Generic Translated Content, Feedback Appreciated

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Enigma
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Re: Generic Translated Content, Feedback Appreciated

Post by Enigma »

YoakeNoHikari wrote:天気がいいなぁ
The weather sure is nice...
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cramped
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Re: Generic Translated Content, Feedback Appreciated

Post by cramped »

Can anyone help me with this sentence, not sure about it coz the last sentence doesn't seem to fit in with the rest.
然而,不管是撒旦还是阿尔谢埃尔,一项在这个国家通用的特别的技术都没有。“工作经历:魔界之王、特长/爱好 征服世界”什么的是万万不能写的,于是不得将目标限定为“欢迎初学者”的职种。
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Re: Generic Translated Content, Feedback Appreciated

Post by Zephyrus »

然而,不管是撒旦还是阿尔谢埃尔,一项在这个国家通用的特别的技术都没有。“工作经历:魔界之王、特长/爱好 征服世界”什么的是万万不能写的,于是不得将目标限定为“欢迎初学者”的职种。
However, both Satan and Ashiya had no particular skills that could be used in this country. Since he couldn't just write "Work experience: Demon King, Skills/Interests: Conquering the world" on their resume, he had no choice but to lock onto jobs that welcomed beginners.
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Re: Generic Translated Content, Feedback Appreciated

Post by pudding321 »

Zephyrus wrote:
然而,不管是撒旦还是阿尔谢埃尔,一项在这个国家通用的特别的技术都没有。“工作经历:魔界之王、特长/爱好 征服世界”什么的是万万不能写的,于是不得将目标限定为“欢迎初学者”的职种。
However, both Satan and Ashiya had no particular skills that could be used in this country. Since he couldn't just write "Work experience: Demon King, Skills/Interests: Conquering the world" on their resume, he had no choice but to lock onto jobs that welcomed beginners.
I'm not trying to compete here; I'm just trying to provide you with more advice. (btw, you have to change the pronouns 'he' in zephyrus's translation to 'they')

The unpalatable truth is that, despite their roles as Satan or Ashiya, they weren't equipped with the skills or crafts that would allow them to find a job in this country. They couldn't possibly put "Occupational experience: Demon King; Strengths/Interests: Conquering the world" in their introductions, and as a result, they were forced to choose jobs that require little occupational or educational background.
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Re: Generic Translated Content, Feedback Appreciated

Post by zzhk »

I'm not sure why pudding is adding embellishments like "unpalatable truth" when cramped is simply asking for meaning.

Also, no, Zephyrus is correct in using "he" because only one of them (Satan) is the Demon King, Ashiya would not call himself king.

Furthermore, since their demon names are being used here, Alciel/Alsiel should be used instead of Ashiya the Japanese alias.

I don't see any compelling reason to change the punctuation or shorten 魔界之王(King of the Demon Realm) to 魔王(Demon King), so here is what I would consider a translation that keeps close to the meaning:

However, neither Satan nor Alsiel possessed any special skills marketable in this country. Since one could not possibly write down "Work Experience: King of the Demon Realm, Skills/Interests: Conquering the World" on a job application, there was no choice but to limit job types to those labeled "beginners welcomed."

Of course, the use of passive voice might be frowned upon even though it sidesteps the lack of pronouns in the source.
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Re: Generic Translated Content, Feedback Appreciated

Post by pudding321 »

zzhk wrote:I'm not sure why pudding is adding embellishments like "unpalatable truth" when cramped is simply asking for meaning.

Also, no, Zephyrus is correct in using "he" because only one of them (Satan) is the Demon King, Ashiya would not call himself king.

Furthermore, since their demon names are being used here, Alciel/Alsiel should be used instead of Ashiya the Japanese alias.

I don't see any compelling reason to change the punctuation or shorten 魔界之王(King of the Demon Realm) to 魔王(Demon King), so here is what I would consider a translation that keeps close to the meaning:

However, neither Satan nor Alsiel possessed any special skills marketable in this country. Since one could not possibly write down "Work Experience: King of the Demon Realm, Skills/Interests: Conquering the World" on a job application, there was no choice but to limit job types to those labeled "beginners welcomed."

Of course, the use of passive voice might be frowned upon even though it sidesteps the lack of pronouns in the source.
Okay, I messed it up. The pronoun should be 'he' there.

And if you're wondering the raison d'etre of those 'embellishments' I have there, I'll tell you: it's basically there because I want it. It's translated liberally. Nothing beats that.

I'd say Demon King is the same as "King of the Demon Realm", if not better since it's shorter. Same thing goes for Pokemon and Pocket Monsters. :roll:

Okay, to be honest, "there were no choice but to limit job types to those labeled "beginners welcomed." sounds awkward in English. I changed it to something else. It's up to the translator anyway. No point in debating about this.
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Re: Generic Translated Content, Feedback Appreciated

Post by Talinnilat »

I am entirely and completely lost with this sentence. Usually I can figure out something from the individual words I can't put it together. Could anyone give a few hints?

It's page 103, line 4 of Ore no Nounai (俺の脳内選択肢が、学園ラブコメを全力で邪魔している) book 1.

「このせかいは、一日ごとに『表時間』と『裏時間』がくりかえされていて、裏時間になると、人類とてきたいする『魔導獣』がいっせいに攻めてくるんですよね?」
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Re: Generic Translated Content, Feedback Appreciated

Post by Kouen no Ten »

Talinnilat wrote:I am entirely and completely lost with this sentence. Usually I can figure out something from the individual words I can't put it together. Could anyone give a few hints?

It's page 103, line 4 of Ore no Nounai (俺の脳内選択肢が、学園ラブコメを全力で邪魔している) book 1.

「このせかいは、一日ごとに『表時間』と『裏時間』がくりかえされていて、裏時間になると、人類とてきたいする『魔導獣』がいっせいに攻めてくるんですよね?」
"This world repeats (External time) and (Internal time) every day, when it is in internal time (Magical beasts) who are malicious towards humanity, start attacking all at once, that's how it is right?"

Edited ver,

"This world repeats (External time) and (Internal time) every day. When it is in internal time, (Magical beasts) who are malicious towards humanity, start attacking all at once, that's how it is right?"
Last edited by Kouen no Ten on Sat Nov 30, 2013 11:57 am, edited 1 time in total.
Talinnilat
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Re: Generic Translated Content, Feedback Appreciated

Post by Talinnilat »

Thanks, I'll have to think about that one for a bit still. Sounds like an anime or manga reference.
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