Use of novel terminology for manga translation

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Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby yxpoh1989 » Mon Jul 15, 2013 11:59 pm

Hi, actually i was trying to translate the manga version of Campione. I have not uploaded it yet, for those worried.

I must say due to reading the translations here, the magic "Instruction" instantaneous got used. And i also can't seem to find any good replacement for it. :(
Some of my other translation might also be influenced from what I read here as well.

So I thought I should ask permission or even notify the people here before I continue on my next step. As I don't want to be labelled a copy.. (-_-")

Hope it's okay.. ( ' _ ' )
PS: I already planned to credit the people here if you are concerned about it as well.
And sorry if I post this on the wrong thread.
Kanji:我は言霊の技を以て、世に義を顕す。これらの呪文は強力にして雄弁なり。強力にして勝利をもたらし、強力にして癒しをもたらす。
Romanji: Ware wa kotodama no waza wo motte, yo ni gi wo arawasu. Korera no jumon wa kyouryoku ni shite youben nari. Kyouryoku nishite shouri wo motarashi, kyouryoku nishite iyashi wo motarasu.
The 7th King, Kusanagi Godou's Incantation of the 10th Incarnation, "Warrior",
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby Kadi » Wed Jul 17, 2013 3:04 am

yxpoh1989 wrote:Hi, actually i was trying to translate the manga version of Campione. I have not uploaded it yet, for those worried.

I must say due to reading the translations here, the magic "Instruction" instantaneous got used. And i also can't seem to find any good replacement for it. :(
Some of my other translation might also be influenced from what I read here as well.

So I thought I should ask permission or even notify the people here before I continue on my next step. As I don't want to be labelled a copy.. (-_-")

Hope it's okay.. ( ' _ ' )
PS: I already planned to credit the people here if you are concerned about it as well.
And sorry if I post this on the wrong thread.


[Was] Not the appropriate thread, but since NONE of the threads would really be [have been] appropriate, it doesn't [didn't] matter (to me).

So, you want to ask for permission to use our terminology? Sure, go ahead. Use the terminology page as much as you can, I'd really like to see consistent terminology over all the different media (I'd also like to see natural terminology, but that tends to be difficult in some cases. And is unrelated here). Frankly, I'd be tempted to find and kick you if you went out of your way to find awkward replacements when there's actually no need, just because of something we chose.

P.S.: If you ever have any questions, feel free to ask here, whether it's about terminology, Campione translation in general or even a particularly stupid sentence. We'll be glad to help any time. Or come on IRC, it's that's your thing. With some luck you'll find someone who actually read Campione (wait, that's not reassuring, is it?)



[Edit: Split from the thread it was originally in. Hope I didn't misunderstand the question~~]
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby yxpoh1989 » Wed Jul 17, 2013 8:26 am

Haha.. Thanks.. then i shall go ahead and publish my first, or half a chapter when i am free
(I did say on the first page that my translations are quick ones... hope they don't mind :P haha)

Actually after translating 2nd part of Chapter 1, (since another scans already did the 1st part), I found 2.5 parts where I use some of the stuff from here.

First is the "Instruction" magic.

Second is actually the incantation for "Boar", but i only reuse "crush the spine, gouge out the bones, hair and the brain."(because that is what I manage to translate as well), the rest were all quite different from what i read from the light novel though... no, actually from the translated light novel.
This is my version:
The master has spoke, to give judgement to the sinner.
Crush the spine, Gouge out the bones, hair and brain.
Trample his blood with the soil.
To the One that keenly approach difficulty, (Might be Problematic;Original: 鋭く近寄り難き者よ、)
Drop the hammer of Justice for the crime of breaking the oath.


Or at least that is what I translated from the Japanese manga.

LOL.. the .5 is due to using True History Compilation Committee for only 1 part of the manga.. (-_-")
Kanji:我は言霊の技を以て、世に義を顕す。これらの呪文は強力にして雄弁なり。強力にして勝利をもたらし、強力にして癒しをもたらす。
Romanji: Ware wa kotodama no waza wo motte, yo ni gi wo arawasu. Korera no jumon wa kyouryoku ni shite youben nari. Kyouryoku nishite shouri wo motarashi, kyouryoku nishite iyashi wo motarasu.
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby Kadi » Wed Jul 17, 2013 11:19 am

Right, the HCC... back in the day Aorii said "there's only one history" and he just dropped the "true" or "official" or whatever... it stuck.

As for the Boar incantation, I think the current version may be based on the Chinese and not very literal? Well, doesn't matter~~ Or rather, I'm the only one who could do something about it and I'm lazy :-)
"Oniichan... Did you just have your own ignition?" - Rika
『また兄さんに騙されました・・・・・・。これで通算482回目ですよ』-さくや
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby florza » Thu Jul 18, 2013 2:23 am

I believe we've had a conversation about the Boar one before on IRC, and none of us could figure out who translated that incantation first. If I recall, we seemed to have attempted in vain to rephrase it, but alas, it was to no avail.

TL Note: When I say "we", I meant me, zzhk, some readers and maybe Kadi.
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby yxpoh1989 » Fri Jul 19, 2013 6:57 pm

Sorry, have been busy on my side.

Okay, i got it. Guess i will change to hcc.

But for the boar incantation, should i change to the current one or can i use my own translation?

On a side note, anyone read the manga?
There is a portion where only a dragon came out but during liliana's explanation, she said 2 dragons.
My only theory is because the dragon contains the essence of the other dragon lol... Tiamat..

Anyone know of this?
Kanji:我は言霊の技を以て、世に義を顕す。これらの呪文は強力にして雄弁なり。強力にして勝利をもたらし、強力にして癒しをもたらす。
Romanji: Ware wa kotodama no waza wo motte, yo ni gi wo arawasu. Korera no jumon wa kyouryoku ni shite youben nari. Kyouryoku nishite shouri wo motarashi, kyouryoku nishite iyashi wo motarasu.
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby Neiseri » Fri Jul 19, 2013 7:45 pm

Well her reaction with the kissing is priceless. I like glasses girls.
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby Kadi » Fri Jul 19, 2013 11:08 pm

@boar: Your choice, really. I doubt I will ever change it in the novels, but it may happen. Or someone else changes it. So if you want to take the shared terminology as far as you can, use (a part of) our version. If you want to stay true to the original meaning, use yours.

@manga: I read some chapters, long ago. "I cant say I liked it", or in other words, I hated its guts. Art is fugly, glasses girl is a train wreck and that's only the stuff I remember. There must've been more. It just didn't feel like Campione. Can't help you with the 2 dragons, though.
"Oniichan... Did you just have your own ignition?" - Rika
『また兄さんに騙されました・・・・・・。これで通算482回目ですよ』-さくや
「お金持ちだから」-巣鴨涼
『もきゅ!』
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby yxpoh1989 » Sat Jul 20, 2013 6:01 pm

Kadi wrote:@boar: Your choice, really. I doubt I will ever change it in the novels, but it may happen. Or someone else changes it. So if you want to take the shared terminology as far as you can, use (a part of) our version. If you want to stay true to the original meaning, use yours.

@manga: I read some chapters, long ago. "I cant say I liked it", or in other words, I hated its guts. Art is fugly, glasses girl is a train wreck and that's only the stuff I remember. There must've been more. It just didn't feel like Campione. Can't help you with the 2 dragons, though.


Haha.. okay, looks like I am more forgiving for alternates of Campione.. :P
Regarding the dragons, I just wanted to make a confirmation but I am pretty sure I didn't make a mistake, so most likely its a hidden meaning type of sentence, so its cool :D

Regards to the Boar, I guess I will stick to mine since I have already translated it and placed it in.. :oops:
And Thanks, Everyone, for your help.
Kanji:我は言霊の技を以て、世に義を顕す。これらの呪文は強力にして雄弁なり。強力にして勝利をもたらし、強力にして癒しをもたらす。
Romanji: Ware wa kotodama no waza wo motte, yo ni gi wo arawasu. Korera no jumon wa kyouryoku ni shite youben nari. Kyouryoku nishite shouri wo motarashi, kyouryoku nishite iyashi wo motarasu.
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby Krozam » Thu Aug 01, 2013 10:11 pm

yxpoh1989 wrote:Second is actually the incantation for "Boar", but i only reuse "crush the spine, gouge out the bones, hair and the brain."(because that is what I manage to translate as well), the rest were all quite different from what i read from the light novel though... no, actually from the translated light novel.
This is my version:
The master has spoke, to give judgement to the sinner.
Crush the spine, Gouge out the bones, hair and brain.
Trample his blood with the soil.
To the One that keenly approach difficulty, (Might be Problematic;Original: 鋭く近寄り難き者よ、)
Drop the hammer of Justice for the crime of breaking the oath.


This needs a bit of editing, though. "The master has spoken", "Trample his blood to the soil", and what I get from the second-to-last line without the full text is something like "Keenly approach the difficult one", though I don't know if that makes any more sense...
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby Rohan123 » Thu Aug 01, 2013 10:56 pm

Krozam wrote:
The master has spoke, to give judgement to the sinner.
Crush the spine, Gouge out the bones, hair and brain.
Trample his blood with the soil.
To the One that keenly approach difficulty, (Might be Problematic;Original: 鋭く近寄り難き者よ、)
Drop the hammer of Justice for the crime of breaking the oath.


This needs a bit of editing, though. "The master has spoken", "Trample his blood to the soil", and what I get from the second-to-last line without the full text is something like "Keenly approach the difficult one", though I don't know if that makes any more sense...


I think that "To the One that keenly approach difficulty" means a person who keenly faces hardships. Though it should be edited to "To the One that keenly approaches difficulty" to fix the grammar.
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby zzhk » Fri Aug 02, 2013 3:10 am

I think that "To the One that keenly approach difficulty" means a person who keenly faces hardships. Though it should be edited to "To the One that keenly approaches difficulty" to fix the grammar.


You're completely off. There's no need for groundless speculation because Verethragna's incantations are all based on Zoroastrian scripture. In particular, hymns from the Yasna.

For an in-depth discussion of the Boar incantation, please refer to past posts in the Terminology thread.
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby Rohan123 » Fri Aug 02, 2013 3:26 am

zzhk wrote:
I think that "To the One that keenly approach difficulty" means a person who keenly faces hardships. Though it should be edited to "To the One that keenly approaches difficulty" to fix the grammar.


You're completely off. There's no need for groundless speculation because Verethragna's incantations are all based on Zoroastrian scripture. In particular, hymns from the Yasna.

For an in-depth discussion of the Boar incantation, please refer to past posts in the Terminology thread.


I was not speculating anything, I was simply stating that when translated to English, "To the One that keenly approaches difficulty" is more grammatically correct, since 'One' is singular so 'approaches' goes with it. Or, it could also be "To the Ones that keenly approach difficulty".
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby yxpoh1989 » Mon Aug 05, 2013 6:21 pm

Oh.
Didn't notice that.. Thanks.

For the editing portions, I tried to translate as similar as possible
Example, the Trample with the soil..

Well, now that I think about it, why did i use "spoke" instead of spoken?
LOL.. Can't rmb..
Kanji:我は言霊の技を以て、世に義を顕す。これらの呪文は強力にして雄弁なり。強力にして勝利をもたらし、強力にして癒しをもたらす。
Romanji: Ware wa kotodama no waza wo motte, yo ni gi wo arawasu. Korera no jumon wa kyouryoku ni shite youben nari. Kyouryoku nishite shouri wo motarashi, kyouryoku nishite iyashi wo motarasu.
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Re: Use of novel terminology for manga translation

Postby yxpoh1989 » Thu Aug 08, 2013 10:08 pm

Need comments for this:

我は主の御名を告げ
世界の中心にて
御身を讃え
帰依し奉り!

My translation is:

Your name is spread and praised from the middle of the world.
May you bless the devoted!

it was just a quick translation on my part.
Wonder if it is totally off?
Thanks again.
Kanji:我は言霊の技を以て、世に義を顕す。これらの呪文は強力にして雄弁なり。強力にして勝利をもたらし、強力にして癒しをもたらす。
Romanji: Ware wa kotodama no waza wo motte, yo ni gi wo arawasu. Korera no jumon wa kyouryoku ni shite youben nari. Kyouryoku nishite shouri wo motarashi, kyouryoku nishite iyashi wo motarasu.
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