[Lone Island Syndrome]

Discuss topics concerning this volume

Moderators: Fringe Security Bureau, Senior Editors, Senior Translators, Alt. Language Translator/Editor, Executive Council, Project Translators, Project Editors

Locked
User avatar
Shiirn
Astral Realm

[Lone Island Syndrome]

Post by Shiirn »

"Welcome everyone, I'm Tamaru Yutaka, right now I'm just an employee helping out at my brother's company. Itsuki always mentions to me about you lot. I was very worried for him when he suddenly had to transfer schools. It's great that he's made so many great friends."
The bold seems very strangely said, might be better to use "Itsuki always talks to me about you" or something along those lines. If the translation was meant to be that way, I digress.
"It's because there's nothing strange that makes him even more suspicious."
'Even more suspicious'? - Doesn't that mean that he had something suspicious about him in the first place? Haruhi stated that there was nothing strange about him, so saying 'even more' is loosely contradicting itself. Might be better to remove the 'even more' and put something like 'very' or 'quite'.

Thank you for listening to my rambling.
User avatar
SubordinateFive
Astral Realm

Post by SubordinateFive »

I don't have copies of the original Japanese novels (yet) but here's my $0.02:
Shiirn wrote:Itsuki always mentions to me about you lot.
Suggestion: Itsuki talks about you all the time.

Reason: Just rewording.
Shiirn wrote:"It's because there's nothing strange that makes him even more suspicious."
Suggestion: "There's nothing suspicious about him. That makes him even more suspicious."

Reason: We know Haruhi basically gets her way (subconsciously). In other words, things tend to happen when she wishes for them. So she's expecting a suspicious character and is disappointed when she doesn't find one.
Locked

Return to “Volume 3 - The Boredom of Suzumiya Haruhi / 第三巻: 涼宮ハルヒの退屈”