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Toaru Majutsu no Index: New Testament

2014-10-19T21:51:10Z

Caolsei:

{{Status|Active}}

{{Toaru:Brief}}

'''<big><big>This page is for the second series of Toaru Majutsu no Index. [[Toaru Majutsu no Index|Click here for the first series.]]</big></big>'''

==Alternative Languages==
The ''Toaru Majutsu no Index'' series is also available in the following languages:
*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index (Indonesia)|Toaru Majutsu no Index ~ Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)]]
*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index ~ Russian:NT|Toaru Majutsu no Index ~ Русский (Russian)]]
*[[To Aru Majutsu no Index ~ (Spanish)|Toaru Majutsu no Index ~ Español (Spanish)]]
*[[To Aru Majutsu no Index ~ Deutsch (German)|Toaru Majutsu no Index ~ Deutsch (German)]]
*[[To Aru Majutsu no Index ~ Italiano (Italian)|Toaru Majutsu no Index ~ Italiano (Italian)]]
*[[To Aru Majutsu no Index Polski|Toaru Majutsu no Index ~ Polski (Polish)]]
*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index - Français|Toaru Majutsu no Index ~ Français (French)]]
*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index ~Brazilian Portuguese~|Toaru Majutsu no Index ~ Português Brasileiro (Brazilian Portuguese)]]

(Note: Translation progress varies for each version.)
----
Visit the [http://www.baka-tsuki.org/forums/index.php Baka-Tsuki Project Forum] to discuss this series and other information from Baka-Tsuki.

==Story Synopsis==

[[Image:NT Index Logo.jpg|200px|thumb|New Testament Logo]]
<big>''This series is a direct sequel and continuation of '''[[Toaru Majutsu no Index]]'''.''</big>

World War III, caused in Russia by Fiamma, the final member of the Roman Catholic Church's secret group God's Right Seat, was brought to an end thanks to the efforts of Kamijou Touma. However, he disappeared at the end of that war.

This is a world without that hero.

The magic side is being reorganized and improved, and days of rest have arrived for its believers.

In the headquarters of the science side, Academy City, Accelerator, the strongest Level 5, has cut his ties with the darkness and is now living a noisy but calm normal life with Last Order and Misaka Worst. Not a sign of Group remains.

With the material for negotiating with the darkness in hand, Hamazura Shiage, a former Skill-Out Level 0, has returned from Russia and formed a new Item with Kinuhata, Takitsubo, and the returned Mugino. They have begun their activities once more.

Those graduates of the darkness have obtained peace and quiet. That is, until the brutal Freshmen appear before them.

==Awards==

{{Toaru:Awards}}

==Translation==
'''Translators Needed'''

If you would like to help translate this series, please post in the forums [http://www.baka-tsuki.org/forums/viewtopic.php?f=58&t=3505 here], and we will help you get started. Thank you.

===Registration===

Those who wish to contribute are asked to notify a supervisor beforehand.

Translators are asked to <big>'''[[Toaru_Majutsu_no_Index:Registration Page|register]]'''</big> which chapters they're working on.

===Format Standards===
'''Every edited chapter must conform to not only the general format guidelines, but also this project's own guidelines.'''
*[[Format_guideline|General Format/Style Guideline]]
*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index:Names and Terminology Guideline|Project-Specific Guidelines: Format, Names, and Terminology]]

'''All edited translations are to be in American English.'''

==Updates==

{{Toaru:Updates}}

==Terminologies==

All terminologies, character information, and other series details are hosted on [http://toarumajutsunoindex.wikia.com/wiki/Toaru_Majutsu_no_Index_Wiki this wiki].

{{Toaru:Mtoggle}}

==The '''''Toaru Majutsu no Index: New Testament''''' series by Kazuma Kamachi==
{{Toaru:Second Series}}


<div class="mw-customtoggle-Current mw-customtoggle-CurrentClose mw-customtoggle-CurrentOpen" style="background:#f2ced4;cursor:pointer" align="center">'''<big>Current Story Arc</big>'''</div>
<div class="mw-collapsible" style="text-align:left;margin:5px5pxclear:both;font-size:100%;background:transparent;width:100%" id="mw-customcollapsible-Current">

[[Image:NT vol 11.jpg|x200px|frameless|right]]
===NT Volume 11===
::*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index:NT Volume11 Illustrations|Illustrations]]
::*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index:NT Volume11 Prologue|Prologue: A Certain Entrance — No.05_Open.]]
::*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index:NT Volume11 Chapter 1|Chapter 1: Reminiscence >> Front Hall — Episode_“the_Girl”.]]
::*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index:NT Volume11 Chapter 2|Chapter 2: Blank Paper >> Labyrinth — Broken_road.]]
::*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index:NT Volume11 Chapter 3|Chapter 3: True Motive >> Gallery — Another_Answer.]]
::*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index:NT Volume11 Chapter 4|Chapter 4: Chance Meeting >> Audience Chamber — Duel_in_the_Mind.]]
::*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index:NT Volume11 Epilogue|Epilogue: A Certain Exit — No.05_Closed(and_Next_Door).]] (NO! Someone trolled, please ban him)
::*[[Toaru Majutsu no Index:NT Volume11 Afterword|Afterword]]
[[#toc|'''Back to Contents''']]
<div style="clear:both"> </div>
</div>

==Side Stories==

{{Toaru:Side Stories}}

==Official Parody Stories==

{{Toaru:Parodies}}

==Story Calendar==

<big>[[Index_Calendar|'''A Certain Unified Calendar''']] ↔ '''Updated for June 2014''' ↔ '''(V3-Final)'''</big>

'''An unofficial pictorial representation of all of the events which have occurred in the Toaru Series collective franchise, in calendar format.'''

[[#toc|'''Back to Contents''']]

==Project Staff==

*Supervisor: ''None Designated''
*Project Manager: '''[[User:OH&S|OH&S]]'''

===Translators===
'''ACTIVE'''
:*'''[[User:Js06|Js06]]'''

===Editors===
:{| class="wikitable" width="150" ; style="float:left"
|
*[[User:EnigmaticRepose|EnigmaticRepose]]
*[[User:Tactician J|Tact]]
*[[User:Snorca|Snorca]]
*[[User:CarVac|CarVac]]
*Kuroi Hadou
*[[User:Hiro Hayase|Hiro Hayase]]
*[[User:Skies|Skies]]
*[[User:Cliff|Cliff]]
|-
|}
{| class="wikitable" width="130" ; style="float:left"
|
:Proofreaders
:*[[User:Tactician J|Tact]]
:*[[User:CarVac|CarVac]]
:*[[User:Xionol|Xionol]]

:Page Checkers
:*[[User:Saganatsu|Saganatsu]]
:*[[User:Wilfriback|Wilfriback]]
|-
|}
<div style="clear:both;"> </div>
'''All editors that can speak and write English proficiently are welcome.'''

==Series Overview==

{{Toaru:Series Overview}}

==More Information==
*[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toaru_Majutsu_no_Index The wikipedia article]
*[http://www12.atwiki.jp/index-index/ とある魔術の禁書目録　Index] (日本語、そしてネタバレの危険性がある！)
*[http://toarumajutsunoindex.wikia.com/wiki/Toaru_Majutsu_no_Index_Wiki Toaru Majutsu no Index Wikia]
*[http://r-s.sakura.ne.jp/w/i_m.htm Kiyotaka Haimura website]

[[Category:Dengeki Bunko]]
[[Category:Genre - Action]]
[[Category:Light novel (English)]]
[[Category:Kazuma Kamachi]]

User talk:Par74583

2013-04-04T21:19:42Z

Caolsei:

===== Comments =====
Ooh, thanks a lot cramped! Didn't expect that you'd join BT this soon. Keep the good work! - Anonymous reader (And one of posters at Animesuki)

Thank you for become one of the translators for Madan no Ou to Vanadis! ( Mokata)
===== Expressing Gratitude =====
Tyvm for picking up the Madan no OU to Vandis and releasing a chapter for us readers to enjoy! (Topler)

==== Madan no Ou to Vandis ====

Thank you for your work on Madan no Ou to Vanadis. Your translation is really good !

User talk:MethodtoMadness

2013-03-01T00:12:41Z

Caolsei: Created page with "Shit, can't you wait like the pathetic leecher that you are?"

Shit, can't you wait like the pathetic leecher that you are?

Talk:Mahouka Koukou no Rettousei:Volume 5 Presidential elections and the queen

2012-12-29T23:08:06Z

Caolsei: Created page with "Thanks a lot for the work, I like your translation very much !"

Thanks a lot for the work, I like your translation very much !

User talk:Code-Zero

2011-12-02T18:23:07Z

Caolsei:

you need to have a line spacing for each line. you can check how the other translations are done.

And I'll upgrade your wiki account to translator one after you are more familiar with wiki-editing. --[[User:Larethian|larethian]] 12:00, 13 November 2011 (CST)

^Thanks for all the help larethian. I will contact you if Im in trouble again.

I'm willing to be the editor in this light novel, if you don't mind. I am interested at first glance so I would like to help you in adding the chapters. -deign12

^That will be great. Please fix any error you see because I make lot of mistakes.

Sure thing. If I can suggest, after translating, that you send it to the email so I can proofread it before you post. - deign12

Hi, have set up the main page for the rest of the volumes, and am planning to upload the missing illustrations. Hope this is ok, if not, just say so. - [[User:Ff7_freak|ff7_freak]]

^Please continue uploading the pictures. I didnt how to upload them so you are helping me alot. 

First of all...thanks for this amazing novel.
I wish 2 help u in editing this novel...have already done ch01 and just completed with ch02...can't wait for the next :) - [[User:Chancs|Chancs]]

^I will try to translate it much quicker then.

Once you get upto the last chapter of volume 1, I'll start setting up the pages for volume 2, so you just have to put text into them. And regarding the chapter names, feel free to translate and add them to volume 2 when you have time, or just put them on my talk page, and I can make the edits on High School DxD main page. - [[User:Ff7_freak|ff7_freak]]

^Thanks alot ff7_freak. I was wondering how to make a new pages. You have been a great help.

One suggestion for when you upload the text, try to avoid using two [ or ] next to each other cos that makes them links, thats why they appear red. - [[User:Ff7_freak|ff7_freak]]

^Okay. The novel had it like that.
Also thanks for editing my translation.

Always seem to be the first to edit your translations, probably because of my timezone. My edits are only basic ones, and I will leave the major ones up to the others editing. Thanks for your translations. - [[User:Ff7_freak|ff7_freak]]

Thanks a lot for translating High School DxD !

Talk:High School DxD

2011-12-01T21:13:55Z

Caolsei:

This project requires a '''synopsis''' and '''registration page''' before it can be submitted for approval; that aside, we're still waiting for the higher-ups to come back of course --[[User:Larethian|larethian]] 23:33, 14 November 2011 (CST)

Very nice ! Thanks a lot for translating the novel Code-Zero.

User:Caolsei

2011-11-16T19:05:10Z

Caolsei: Created page with "trying to help edit Campione!"

trying to help edit Campione!

Talk:Campione!:Volume 1 Chapter3

2011-11-06T13:51:27Z

Caolsei: Created page with "Thank you a lot for your work. Campione! is very nice to read. I'll try to edit what mistakes i think i see but if i'm mistaken myself do not hesitate to change them back. Good ..."

Thank you a lot for your work.
Campione! is very nice to read.
I'll try to edit what mistakes i think i see but if i'm mistaken myself do not hesitate to change them back.
Good luck to you if you're planning to continue translating it.

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3.5 Me and Shouko and Kisaragi Highlands

2011-05-11T19:54:40Z

Caolsei:

==Me and Shouko and Kisaragi Highlands==

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 093.jpg|thumb|Me and Shouko and Kisaragi Highlands]]

“Akihisa.”

“Hm? Yuuji, what's up?

“I just thought of it, what will you do with those tickets?”

“Those tickets—are you talking about the free Kisaragi Highlands tickets?”

“Yeah, I remember that they have some trial run before they fully begin operations. Why don't you get Himeji to come along?”

“Wha, what are you saying, Yuuji!? If we use those tickets, the Kisaragi corporaion will use all their power of force those people who went to marry each other! Wouldn't Himeji-san be pitiful if it ends up like this?”

“That's sort of true. They did try their best to come up with that ill omen of 'any couple who goes there will gain happiness'. They probably put in lots of effort to make that a reality.”

“Mmm, that's the case.”

“However, I don't think Himeji will refuse.”

“...Eh?”

“Well, if you summon your courage and try to ask her out, I don't think she will really refuse.”

“Ah, ahhahaha, here we go again. Yuuji, you really love to make fun of me~ how can I possibly get married to Himeji-san? That's totally impossible.”

“Uuu~ since you said so, I'll leave it as that. Then, if you're not going, how are you going to use those tickers?”

“I just so happened to have someone who's about to get married, so I'll just send the tickets to that person.”

“Oh yeah, if someone wants to get married, the tickets will work extremely well. And if they can get married successfully, Kisaragi Corporation will be extremly happy.”

“Yeah, if it's successful, everyone will be happy.”

“Are those two who're getting married getting along well?”

“Nn, they just need an opportunity.”

“I see, it'll be great if they can get together.”

“Don't worry. They'll always be together.”

<center>☆</center>

On a certain holiday morning, the sunlight that seeps through the gaps of the blinds and the chirping of the sparrows woke me from my dream.

When I woke up—

“...Good morning, Yuuji.”

—I found Shouko standing beside my bed.

“...The weather today is good.”

Shouko pulls the blinds, causing the sunlight to shine brightly into my room.

“Hm? Ahh, seems good.”

The overly bright light causes me to narrow my eyes as I closely inspects the figure of my childhood friend.

As today's a holiday, she's not wearing the uniform. The top is a white long-sleeved knitted coat with a thin pink shirt underneath, and matching them at the bottom is a light knee length skirt. There's a piece of cloth meant to hide the interior it should be called an underskirt, right? Shouko would normally wear a T-shirt and jeans or shorts, so seems like she deliberately dolled herself up today.

I'm totally shocked that I actually checked through Shouko's attire, since it's not in my nature. Maybe I haven't woken up, right?

I shake my head hard to get rid of the sleepy sensation, and then turn to look at Shouko.

“I haven't greeted you yet. Morning, Shouko.”

“...Nn, morning.”

I pull my blanket aside and get off the bed.

Speaking of which, why did Shouko come to my room? Do I have a date with her or something?

I start to rack my just-woken-up brain—no good, I can't remember anything.

Since I can't think of anything, it means I don't have a date with her, right? I see.

“Sorry, Shouko, pass me my handphone.”

“...Are you going to make a call?”

“Mm, yeah.”

After receiving the phone that Shouko passed over, I press a few buttons.

If this person is in my room, this means—

“Ah, hello? Is this the police station?”

SHE'S AN INTRUDER!

<center>☆</center>

THOMP THOMP THOMP THOMP THOMP!! CRRRAAAAKKKK!!!

“MOM! TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON HERE!!”

“Oh my, Yuuji, good morning.”

After rushing into the kitchen, I saw my mom standing at the basin as she washes the dishes, even saying good morning to me energetically.

“WHAT MORNING!? WHY WAS SHOUKO IN MY ROOM!? I ENDED UP BEING TREATED BY THE POLICE AS SOME DELUDED MANIAC THAT CAN'T TELL WHAT'S 2-D AND 3-D!!!”

My childhood friend came into my room and called me up—when I said that, the reaction left a pain that won't ever be erased. What I can say is that even if I overslept, this is the greatest mistake I ever made in my entire life!

“...Eh?”

Hearing my complaints, those wide eyes of my mom blink quite a few times. She's almost 40, and yet this look is just like a kid. Maybe it's because of this natural doll-like face that my mom looks a lot younger than what she really is. 'People often mistook me for a college student'—that's was she herself said. However, my dad and I don't even believe this one bit. No matter what, she can't possibly be seen as a college student.

“You were talking about Shouko?”

Mom placed her hand on her face as she said that to me with a bothered look on her face.

Seeing her attitude...did Shouko sneak into my room? Mom didn't help out? If this were the case, I may have failed to think things through when I roared at her.”

“Ahh, nothing much, sorry for shouting at you early in the morning. I thought that mom helped her enter my room—”

“Really, Shouko's too naïve. I helped her create this opportunity, yet she didn't do anything, that's really a pi—oh my, Yuuji, why are you grabbing onto your mom's face?”

“SO YOU'RE THE ONE WHO DID THAT!!!”

Seems like I have to educate her on the common sense a mother should have.

“...Yuuji, you can't bully mom.”

“Shouko, don't say it. As a son, I have to re-educate this mother.”

Appearing later, Shouko tugged my arm as she tried to stop me. Speaking of which, it's rather weird when Shouko just said 'mom' with a different tone. However, I guess I shouldn't retort back at her for my own safety.

“...if you don't listen, I'm going to read this book with mom.”

Shouko pulled out an A4-sized book. Hm? That book...don't tell me—

“Hold, hold on a minute! That shouldn't be what girls should be reading! Hurry up and return it to me!”

Why on earth is it that book! That's the treasure trove that even Muttsulini would even cry over! She actually found it! This is bad! Speaking of which, how did she find it? I hid it in a place that even my mom couldn't find it even though she's living in the same house as me!”

“Oh my, Shouko, is that the secret book with the world history reference cover over it? Yuuji hid it in the double-layer 3rd drawer.”

I have never been so envious of Akihisa's live-alone lifestyle like now.

“I, I got it. I'll let go of mom now.”

I obediently let go of the death grip.

To actually force me to surrender with this trick. This is too despicable!

“...That's good. If so—”

Damn it! Once I get back my book, I'll hide it in a place where you two can't find it. I'll might as well lock it up in maximum security—

“...I'll only forgive you if you burn it.”

“Sorry Shouko, but no matter what, that isn't what one will do after forgiving, right?”

Normally, if I'm forgiven, I should have my book back.

“...Then I won't forgive you even if you burn this book.”

“Isn't there an option of not burning this?”

Though I knew her since elementary school, I will occasionally be unable to tell what the heck is going on with that person's mind.

“Hoho, you two still have quite the good relationship.”

having been released from the grip, my mom doesn't look panicked at all. She washes the last dish and wipes her hands off her apron. Such a carefree mother.

“I don't think we have quite the good relationship here...”

“Oh my, is that so?”

My mom still shows a smiley face. This mother will most likely say 'oh my, isn't that interesting' when she sees me knocked down by a car, right?

“Really, you two...speaking of which, what are you doing here, Shouko?”

“...Date.”

“Date? Do I have a date with you?”

“...Mm.”

Like usual Shouko nods her head as she pulls out a small piece of paper.

That seems to be some sort of ticket. Let me see, that is...

“Oh my, isn't that the Kisaragi Highlands trial ticket? And it says that it's a free experience. It should be a special ticket right? You're amazing Shouko, to be able to get such a ticket~”

“...A kind soul gave it to me.”

“Is that so? That's great~ Yuuji, who're you calling?”

“I got something to say to some scum.”

I first shut off the incoming display number of the handphone, and then dial Akihisa's number.

After a few seconds of dialling, that damned despicable foe picks up his phone with a casual tone.

“Hello hello? Who're you looking for?”

'''''“...............................I'M GOING TO KILL YOU.”'''''

“Eh? What! Who are you? That's really scar—(cuts off)”

Hearing the extremely awkward voice from the phone, I silently cut the phone line. At least I feel better now.

“...Let's go, Yuuji.”

Shouko grabbed my hand. Seems like she really wants to go.

“I don't want to even if I die.”

However, I definitely can't fulfil this wish of yours.

If it were just an ordinary tripe to a theme park, I might consider it a bit. However, that's an activity that Kisaragi Corporation planned, there's definitely something dangerous about it.

If I'm to go along with Shouko and drop into their trap, I'll definitely be forced to to get married with her. No matter what, I have to prevent this sort of thing from happening!

“Oh my, why are you so unwilling, Yuuji? Just go out and play with Shouko.”

My mom, who doesn't know anything at all, said it as if it were so easy.

“Obviously, I don't want to go because of many reasons.”

Only a few people, including Akihisa and me know of the Kisaragi Corporation's plan, and even Shouko, who's from the same school doesn't know anything about it. If she's to know of something like 'mobilizing the entire power of Kisaragi Corporation to force two people to marry', no matter what kind of dirty tactics she'll use, Shouko will definitely force me to join in, because she's that kind of a woman.

“...I want to go with Yuuji.”

It's been about 7 years since this person started to show her affections for me. No matter what I say, she wouldn't budge. In a certain sense, I really have to respect that unwavering will of hers.

That's the case, but I have to refuse, or else I'll really be forced to get married. No matter what, I don't want to marry in High school; I want to enjoy a few more years of my free life.

Okay, since this can't be helped, I'll have to say clearly 'Shouko, you better give up. Thus, I take a deep breath, and then say—

“Shouko.”

“I don't want.”

“You better give—”

Too fast! Way too fast! I only said her name!

“Shou, Shouko! Listen to me first...”

“...If you don't want to go no matter what—”

Overpowering my incomplete words, Shouko pulls out a small booklet from her bag.

“...Choose one.”

What Shouko pulled out was a marriage location recommendation book.

“Sorry, I have no idea how we ended up like this.”

“...You swore to me before that we'll get married if you break our promise.”

Why do I feel that the content of the promise was changed?

“Mommy feels that it's good to go overseas and get married, like Hawaii or some other foreign country~”

“Mom, why aren't you caring about what your own son thinks!?”

“...Yuuji, choose one. I'm going to book the venue.”

“Ah, Eruope seems rather good. Yuuji, which one do you think is good?”

“Uuu...”

No matter what I choose, it doesn't seem like I can avoid the issue of marriage. This scenario's way too precarious. But I'm not going to crumble due to this level of difficulty. Got to find a way to get away from it!

<center>☆</center>

“...I'm really too useless...”

After spending more than 2 hours on the train an don the bus, Shouko and I finally arrived in front of Kisaragi Highlands.

This, this couldn't be helped! If it's just Shouko, fine, but even my mum even agreed to us getting married enthusiastically! I had to get away from that delicate yet hard to define atmosphere! Who can blame me right now!

“...We're finally here.”

Shouko isn't even hiding her delight as she stares at the theme park in front of her.

Okay...seeing her so happy like this, guess it's worth bringing her here. Mm hum.

“Okay, Shouko, since we're already here—”

“...Mn.”

“Let's hurry up and go back.”

CRACK.

“...No, I must go in.”

“Hahaha, Shouko, my arm won't go in that direction.”

My arm got clamped down forcefully as I told Shouko while giving off cold sweat.

Damn it, my fingers are getting numb.

“...This is what couples will do.”

“Hold on Shouko! Are you thinking that this intimate act of holding hands isn't any different from surrendering?”

“?”

Seeing her head full of question marks, this woman's way too terrifying. She probably thinks that all the couples in the world will lock their arms together in order to keep their lovers around

“...Anyway, let's go in.”

“GUH! At least release my hand before going! My arm will really get twisted if this keeps up!”

As my left arm got taken as a hostage, I got dragged by Shouko to the entrance. Since today's a trial operation day before the real opening, we didn't wait long before arriving in front of the attendants.

“Welcome to Kisaragi Highlands!”

This youngster doesn't look like a Japanese, since he's smiling at us while saying that in a weird tone. He looks like an Asian alright, but I don't know if he's a Japanese.

“Today's our trail day. Do you two have an entrance ticket?”

“...Yea.”

Shouko produced that ticket from her pocket.

“Sorry, please excuse me.”

The attendant looked back at us after seeing that coupon, and the smile that was on his face is instantly frozen.

“...Can't this ticket be used?”

Seeing the attendant's expression change, Shouko starts to look rather worried.

“Nonono, this ticket can be used. However, please hold on~”

The attendant immediately whips out a handphone from his pocket as he starts to make a call to someone.

“—It's me. Those two are here. Prepare the wedding now, I'll think of a way to stop them.”

“Oi, hold on! What's with those inappropriate words!”

The youngster's expression immediately became rather scary. Is he a worker of that damned corporation that started all these?

“...Prepare the wedding?”

Shouko tilts her head in bewilderment. Since she doesn't know of what Kisaragi Corporation is planning, she must be feeling puzzled after hearing that 'Prepare Wedding'.

“Please don't mind, this is just a logistics problem.”

The attendant reverts back to his original smile in order to hide the situation, but no matter how I look that it, it's just too strange.

“Oi, wasn't your Japanese really fluent when you were talking on the phone?”

“O~ uu, Japanese is really tough, I don't know what you're saying~”

This guy really bugs me.

“Speaking of which, there's no need to prepare whatsoever wedding. Just let us go in and don't bother us.”

Thanks to the phone call just now, I know what they're planning. However, I'm not planning on letting them do whatever they want. If not, my entire life will be...

“Don't say that, please like us handle this and prepare a super duper wedding for you~”

“No need.”

“You must allow us no matter what.”

“No.”

“Please?”

“I refuse?”

“If you refuse, I'm going to send some rotten crayfish to your house!”

“NO! Our family will get food poisoning if that happens!”

My mum will definitely think that those are Ise shrimps. To actually make such a terrifying threat, this damned fake foreigner!

“Then, let's have a commemorative photo.”

“...Commemorative photo?”

“Yes, this will be a super matching imprint of a couple's love~”

“...Yuuji and I...match each other (blushes).”

Shouko started to blush because of this fake foreigner's nonsense.

“Sorry to keep you waiting. I have the camera here.”

At this moment, another worker's holding onto a camera with one hand as his cap is lowered.

Hm? I seem to have met this guy before. Isn't it too suspicious that he lowered his cap deliberately?

“You specially brought the camera here. Sorry to bother you, you've been a great help.”

The fake foreigner thanked as he received the camera. That's really suspicious! They aren't convenience store workers, is there a need to be so polite to each other in a theme park?

—Hm, let me try this.

“Sorry, I'm going to make a call.”

“Okay, please.”

I pulled out my phone and call this huge idiot named 'Yoshii Akihisa' while not showing my number.

Prrrr Prrrr.

“Ah, sorry, my phone rang.”

Once the phone rang, the butt pocket of the guy who brought the camera over rang.

Success!

''“Yo~ Akihisa, you sure found it interesting, right?”''

“You got the wrong person!”

Dash!

“Ah, damn it! You dare to run away? Let go of me, you fake foreigner!”

“He's one of our workers here, the name's Elizabeth Hanako (35 years old), also known as Steve. He's definitely not called Yoshii or something,”

“Shut up! You actually came up with such a ridiculous name and age without flinching! And no matter what, that sort of name can't possibly be called Steve! Speaking of which, I never called that guy by his surname Yoshii, right?”

Akihisa got away while I was held up by the fake foreigner.

That damned Itsuki's definitely trying to set me up...what is he treating my life as! Is he thinking about payback?

But isn't it too much to actually act as a worker here? This doesn't seem like Akihisa's working alone.

That old granny---let me repeat that again, the principal helped out as well, right? Since that damned old granny's indebted to him, she probably won't refuse.

No, not just the old granny, even the rest should be involved.

“Sorry Shouko, but just endure this for a while.”

“?”

I reach my hand out to grab the stunned Shouko's skirt and lift it up slight—to the length where her underwear can be seen.

“...(Flash)!”

At that moment, from the corner of my eyes, I caught a figure reach his arms and clutch in front of his chest

—Anyway, it's just a guy who's wearing a fox costume.

“To reach his arms quickly in and clutch in front of his chest for a digital camera...even Muttsulini's heee?”

After exchanging glances with me, that fox mascot immediately disappeared agilely like a rabbit.

Since Akihisa and Muttsulini are around, then Hideyoshi and and Himeji should be around somewhere. Really, these guys...why are they so tireless when it comes to other people's misfortune!

“...Yuuji, ecchi.”

Just as I'm wondering how to punish them, I noticed that Shouko's staring at me rather angrily.

“What? You, you're mistaken! I'm not interested in you underwear at all!”

“...I'll be bothered if that's the case.”

“GUUAAHHH!! THAT'S COMPLETELY UNREASONABLE!!!”

Shouko stretched her arm and grabbed my skull.I seem to hear my own bone cracking.

“Okay, it's now time to take the photo. Say cheese.”

The light start to flash nearby, and then an electronic sound can be heard.

“We'll print it immediately, so please wait for us here.”

“...I know, I'll be waiting for you in this position.”

“GUUAHH!! IF YOU MAINTAIN THIS POSITION, MY SKULL WILL...”

Born with an ever honest personality, Shouko didn't even let go as she continues to wait in this position.

Does she really like me?

“It's done. Please take this.”

After a short while, the fake foreigner came back with the photo, and I got released.

“...Thank you.”

Shouko received the photo over happily.

“...Look, Yuuji, this is our memory.”

Shouko said this as she brought the photo right in front of me, who's coughing now.

“What's with this photo!”

The image taken was actually the back of Shouko's head and me being executed painfully. Also—

“I added a special touch for you, you know.”

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The special touch was adding a heart-shaped frame around our photo and adding the words, "We're about to get married".

Surrounding the woman who let out the claw of Heaven and the guy who was suffering because of it. To the unsuspecting folks, they should be wondering what happened between those two that cause them to end up in marriage...but no matter how I look at it, there can never be happiness between these two!

“Can I hang this up in our theme park photo room?”

“Are you still normal? What's the benefit of having such a photo as a decoration?”

Any customer who sees this will definitely retreat.

"...Are you embarrassed, Yuuji?”

“Sorry, but no matter how I look at this, this photo doesn't seem to warrant any need for me to be embarrassed."

Just as I was looking at this ridiculous photo and about to say this—

“Ahh! Someone's taking a photo! Let's get them to take a photo for us~”

“As a wedding commemoration photo of us? That's cool. Oi, you're a worker here, right? Help us take a photo!!”

The arrogant delinquent couple shouted as they head towards us.

“Sorry, but this couple is targeted by the corporation's plan...”

The fake foreigner refused. Seems like this photo is another scheme in the corporation's plan, and only we're entitled to it.

“What are you saying? Is there anything wrong with it? We're customers, you understand!?”

“Waa~ Ryouta's so cool~~”

The man glares angrily a the fake foreigner as he looks from below to top. Seems like this guy's really a delinquent. The woman's who's excited about this guy's roguishness probably has a screw loose or something.

“And our photo should be more attractive compared to those old-fashioned brats, right?

“That's right, compared to that dumb guy, my Ryouta's 100 times cooler than him!”

Never mind, I'll slip away while that delinquent couple's distracted.

“....(tatatatata).”

“Eh Oi, Shouko, where're you going?”

I grabbed Shouko's wrist just as she's angrily charing that the couple.

“...Those two just insulted Yuuji.”

“I say, you... If we're to bother about this, we won't be able to end this.”

We'll definitely not end up with something good if we're to clash with those guys. Besides, no matter what they say, I won't even care about it. Just seeing them is enough to irritate me.

“Let's go, Shouko.”

“...Since Yuuji said so...”

Seems like Shouko doesn't want to see them as well, as she followed after I told her.

“Ahhh! If you continue to drag on like this, I'll report to the media that your customer service is atrocious, you hear me!?”

“That's right~ we're customers!!”

The delinquent couple behind us continue to shout.

The promotional event actually got such customers here. Kisaragi Highland's really unlucky.

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“Okay then, let's go home after we walk around.”

“...We must walk around happily.”

Like what was advertised, the theme park has all sorts of the latest games, from the 3D-effects gaming equipment to the horrifying roller coast, coffee cups, carousels. There are even some attractions with things imagine even with the outer appearances.”

“It'll be easier if there's a cinema somewhere here.”

“...It's rare for us to come by, that won't do.”

My proposal got rejected by Shouko. Though it's troublesome, I'm trying to find an attraction that won't make both sides awkward. At this moment, a mascot came to us while looking like it's going to fall. She seems similar to that fox mascot just now, except in a different outfit. And this one has a large butterfly knot on it, so it should be a female, right?

“Onii-chan, Phi Phi will introduce you to some interesting attractions!”

A youthful girl's voice can be heard from below the mascot, and it seems like it doesn't have a voice changer, since it seems like a normal person...or rather, this is a familiar voice. Am I thinking too much? Why do I feel that this sounds like a certain honor student from our class.

Seems like I have to check it out.

“Speaking of which, the female college student who's working part-time is dating Akihisa to a movie.”

“Ehh, are you talking about Akihisa-kun? Where did you see that?”

These guys actually came here...

“Oi, Himeji! You're here to help?”

“Ah! You, you're mistaken! I—no, Phi Phi isn't called Himeji! As you can see, Phi Phi is a fox girl!”

To actually think of a way to force her way out of this, Himeji's a really serious person.

“Okay Phi Phi, then let's see you introduce the place.”

“Ah? Oh, mm! Phi Phi recommends the haunted house directly opposite.”

Himeji—no, Phi Phi stretched her hand out and points to a building on the other side of the fountain. Hm, so it's the famous haunted house that was built from an abandoned hospital?

“Really, thanks.”

“No problems. Enjoy yourself.”

“Oh, Shouko, let's go to 'some place other than the haunted house'.”

I push Shouko from behind. The moment I said this, Himeji immediately pulled my wrist.

“Wai wai wai wai wait! Why are you not going to the recommended place!”

“You dare to ask me why! I can tell from you tone that there's some trap inside to make fun of me right? I'm not going to go on a suicide run.”

No matter how good her grades is, Himeji really can't fool anyone. She immediately revealed their plan accidentally.

“I, I'll be really bothered! Please, please go there!”

“I refuse.”

I don't want to sell my life away for just her request! I must refuse no matter what, I got a good freedom of youth ahead of me!

“Please~ you'll definitely find the ghost house interesting!”

“I, DON'T, WANT!”

I ignore Himeji, who's tugging at me. However, she continues to tug at me as I drag her. That's really troublesome. Just as I intend to shrug her away, something seems to be heading for us.

“End of the line, Yuuji—no, the ugly guy over there!”

“These dumb movements...is it Akihisa?”

Appearing in a dumb manner is the male mascot I just found. What the heck, a change of costumes?

“How rude! I—no, wait, since when is Noi Noi dumb?”

“Shut up! What's wrong with calling out an idiot who's wearing the mascot head the other way around!”

What's supposed to be a cute and cuddly doll now has its head turned backwards because of Akihisa, and now it's a bone-chilling creature.

“...Yuuji, Noi Noi's just a kid.”

“Shouko, a creature that can put the head wrongly will be annihilated by society.”

You'll die if you don't watch yourself. An existence like him can only exist at the bottom of the food chain.

“Ah, Akihisa-kun, your head's turned backwards! Ahh! The kids were crying once they saw you!”

“Wah, this isn't good! No wonder I can't see what's in front!”

“Hurry up and put the head properly, or Sakamoto-kun will find out!”

To think that you can actually fool me till now, these two are really a match for each other.

“Ah, sorry to keep you waiting.”

An even more troublesome person is here—the fake foreigner from just now. To think that he actually caught up to us so quickly.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please head to the haunted house.”

“Didn't I say that I don't want to!?”

I don't want to deliberately enter that dangerous place.

“If you refuse, I'll send a large amount of food to your house.”

“Don't do that! If you do, my family's lives will be at risk!”

My mum won't even bother about what to do unless we finish up all the food. How can this guy be so vicious?

“Speaking of which, Akihisa-kun, who's the female university student who was with you? To think that you have the time to chase after other girls even during this important situation...”

“Eh? What are you talking about? I never—hm? Why are you taking you phone out? Who're you calling here?”

“I think Minami will be here soon. Before that, please explain clearly.”

“No, no way! If there's a bloodshed incident on opening day, the ratings of this theme park will—GYYAH! I feel that someone's rushing at me angrily! I'll do anything, kneel, beg for forgiveness, just don't kill me!!”

The two fantasy creatures are having a couple's quarrel. What an unbelievable scene.

“Miss Sakamoto Shouko, you may hug your boyfriend when you enter the haunted house in any way that you want.”

“...Yuuji, I want to go.”

“You're really despicable. Actually thinking of using Shouko to force me into the trap! And who asked you to randomly change Shouko's surname! Her surname's Kirishima!”

“...Don't worry, it'll become Sakamoto soon.”

Without noticing it, Shouko again controls my arm. If so, I can't resist!

“Okay, then please sign here.”

The fake foreigner pulls out a document and a pen. What's this?

“Just an ordinary consent form.”

We're just entering a haunted house. Is there really a need to sign a consent form? Is it really that dangerous inside?

“Seems interesting.”

Since there's a consent form, it should mean that there's something that's really scary inside. Maybe it's really interesting.

I'm starting to feel a little interested as I get ready to sign that consent form with the ball-point pen.

'Consent form'

1. I—Sakamoto Yuuji swear to take Kirishima Shouko as my wife, through thick and thin, loving each other for the rest of our lives.
2. I swear that we will get married at Kisaragi Highlands.
3. No matter what happens, I will never leave Kirishima Shouko.

“...Here, Yuuji, here's the seal.”

“The inkpad's here.”

“Am I the only one? Am I the only one who finds this completely ridiculous!?”

These guys are crazy!

“That's a joke. There's no need to sign this, you can just go in.”

“...mn, just joking.”

“You guys prepared the carbon papers, and you actually dare say that you're joking!”

I really have a lot of things to say, but isn't their common sense too cruel or something?

“It'll be rather inconvenient to bring that huge bag around. I'll keep it for you.”

“...Sorry to bother you.”

Shouko hands her bag over to the fake foreigner. Speaking of which, her bag's really huge.

“...The contents inside may spillover, so please don't put it horizontally.”

“You're talking about this bag? I understand, please don't worry.”

Spill out? What's inside that bag?

“Then enjoy to you hearts' content.”

“...Let's go, Yuuji.”

“OWOWOWOWOW! MY ARM'S GOING TO GET TWISTED BY YOU!”

My resistance ends up useless, and after a while, I got dragged by her to the entrance of the haunted house. Did they deliberately try to create the atmosphere? The haunted house has automatic sliding doors, but there's not a single light inside. It feels like someone's making some moves.

“It's me. The prey has already entered the haunted house. We'll start with the plan that Mr Yoshii came up with.”

Before the auto-door closed, I could hear the fake foreigner say that.

So Akihisa came up with the plan? I don't know what's going on, but I won't let that guy get what he wants!

Shouko and I continue to walk down this dark corridor. Kk, kk...the the footsteps on the linoleum's a lot clearer than what I expected.

“As expected of a haunted house that's modified from an abandoned hospital, this sure is rare.”

“...It's a bit scary.”

“It's really rare for you to be afraid even though there's nothing.”

“...Maybe.”

We continue to move on in the directions mapped out by the sign 'move forward'.

There's nothing on the 1st level, and so we head upstairs. Before we can take a few steps, there finally seems to be something going on.

“—fer—ji—”

With a heart chilling wind, a distorted voice can be heard.

Hm? Is this a cry of agony?

“...Is this voice...Yuuji?”

“Hm? Is that so?”

The voice does sound similar to mine. Most likely, Hideyoshi's imitating my voice.

To hear my own voice without me even speaking, it does feel scary. I thought that Akihisa's plan will be rather simple or something—

“I prefer Himeji to Shouko, and her breasts are bigger.”

“...Yuuji, are you ready?”

“Scary! Shouko's face actually became like a Hannya! That's super thrilling!”

How did that damned Akihisa think of such a terrifying method! Is he planning not not letting me escape here alive!?

Just as I'm getting worried, I suddenly hear some sort of mechanism being activated.

Great! Well done! I can protect my own life now.

“Ah, Shouko! Something seemed to have appeared!”

Turning to where the sound came from, something appeared at the originally empty place . That is—

“...How kind of them.”

—A mace?

That damned Akihisa! He actually prepared everything! Though they messed up on how it's supposed to be scary, this is one super duper scary haunted house!”

“...Yuuji, where are you going to escape to?”

Wielding the mace, my childhood friend came pursuing after me in this new method of playing, and I got chased for an entire hour.

However, does Akihisa really think that this will bring Shouko and me together?

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I continued to escape as I tried to explain to Shouko that Hideyoshi was mimicking my voice, and finally managed to calm her down and bring her out from the house.

“It's been tough on you! How about that? Do you two feel like getting married?”

“Only you and that idiot Akihisa will think this will make us get married...”

Forget about creating a gap between us, I'm feeling that the divide between me and Shouko just got wider.

“That's strange? I though those couples who pass through adversity together won't have such a problem with each other...”

“Well, ya, it would have been possible if the crisis didn't come from the ones who should be together...”

This fake foreigner's brain shouldn't be any different from Akihisa, right?

But now at least I can relax a bit. If it's a plan Akihisa came up with, there wouldn't be any delinquents coming up to threaten or extort me. If so, I don't have to keep thinking of ways to escape...how troublesome. If possible, I really want to go home now.

“...About time to eat lunch.”

Shouko stares above the fountain as she mutters. The large clock that's in that direction indicates that it's 1pm. That's right, it's about time to eat.

“...That, my bag--”

“Yes, we prepared a deluxe meal for both guests. Please follow me.”

The fake foreigner walks away after saying this.

They actually prepared lunch for us. That entrance ticket sure isn't for show.

“What's wrong, Shouko?”

“...Nothing.”

“?”
What's with that lonely look on her face out of a sudden?

“...Yuuji, if we don't hurry up, we won't be able to catch up with him.”
“Hm, you're right.”

Maybe believing that we will follow him, the fake foreigner has already walked quite some distance. Well, since he said that they prepared a meal for us, we'll let him treat us.

I hurriedly walk away, and after a walk, what appears in front of me is a trendy-looking restaurant.

“Please enjoy the meal that we'll be preparing for you here.”

Immediately, the fake foreigner ushered us into a wide hall that seems like a party hall.

There's a round table right in the middle, and there is also a stage and some small tables. The atmosphere now doesn't look like a restaurant, but like a—

“...A quiz show?”

That's right, though there's a lot of luxurious food on the table, this is basically a quiz show that we always see on TV.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, welcome.”

Am attendant walks over as he leads us to our seats—what the hack, I know this guy too!

“Why are you dressed up as an attendant, Hideyoshi?”

“Hideyoshi? What are you talking about?”

My classmate shows a poker face. Has this guy gotten into character? Seems like it's hard to rip this guy's mask off.

I'll just use the useful tool that I used on Akihisa!

“Since you deny it, I'll just confirm it.”

I pull out my phone and look for a name in the phonebook called 'Kinoshita Hideyoshi'. But before I could press the call button, the attendant beside me immediately took action.

“Ah, my phone slip!”

Hideyoshi (?) pulls out his phone and threw it hard at the fountain. Ploop, the sound of something landing in the water can be heard.

“Is, is there a need to go to such an extent? Your phone will definitely spoil!”

“I don't understand what you're saying.”

Hideyoshi continues to give me the poke face.

Even if he doesn't really use it, to throw the handphone away without a second thought....the enemy's thoroughly into character.

“Then, if you allow me, please.”

“Ah, ooh...”

We're led by the attendant to the center of the hall.

“As the two guests are underaged, we've prepared these drinks for you.”

After we sat down, the attendant pours some non-alcoholic champagne into our glasses, not even forgetting to introduce us the brand of this champagne. He's really into it, as expected of someone from the drama society.

“Please enjoy your appetiser.”

After putting down the glasses the dishes are served onto this table. Seeing the luxurious food that's only the appetiser, I can only grimace that I'm not used to holding a fork and a knife.

Speaking of which, Shouko should be rather used to this sort of cuisine, right?

Until we finished eating, there doesn't seem to be any traps around. Just as I thought that I can heave a sigh of relief—

“Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for attending this trial trip of Kisaragi Highlands's before it officially opens!”

A loud voice booms throughout the entire hall.
“Actually, in this hall today, there will be a wedding experience event to prepare a high school couple!”

Some of the drink I just gulped down accidentally sputtered out of the nose.

“We at Kisaragi Corporation wish to encourage this couple and created such a scheme! The scheme is called the 'Kisaragi Highlands wedding experience' quiz show~

a heavy sound of the entrance being locked can be heard from the entrance. To actually cut off my escape route, damn you Akihisa! Seems like you have grasped how I would think!

“The content of this scheme is simple. You just need to answer all the 5 provided questions to enjoy the wedding of the highest class! Of course, if you wish, there's no problems with directly registering as a couple.”

That's a huge problem, you big idiot.

“Then Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, please stand on the stage in front!”

As the host earnestly pointed in our direction, everyone in the restaurant turned around to look at us.

“...A wedding experience...I'll do my best!”

“Calm down Shouko. A wedding has to be agreed by both sides—OWWWWW!!! MY EARS ARE ABOUT TO BE RIPPED OFF! I'LL GO! I'LL GO! JUST LET ME GO!”

I continue to keep telling myself that this is just an experience, but I still feel unhappy as I step on on the stage.

With the workers leading us, Shouko and I are assigned to our seats.

“Okay, the 'Kisaragi Highlands wedding experience' quiz show begins now!”

There's a huge button between Shouko and me, and it seems like a standard answering system where we have to press the button before answering.

Well...if I get the answer correct, I'll get a prize, but if I answer a few questions wrongly, this event will be a bust, right? Seems like I'll just have to keep answering wrongly.

“And the first question is up!”

I reach my hand out for the button as I wait for the question.

Come on, show me what questions you have...

“When is Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko's wedding anniversary?”

That's too strange! I don't even understand what this question is about!?

—Ding dong!

Damn it! Before I even noticed, Shouko actually pressed the button. But even if it's Shouko, she can't possibly answer a question that has a non-existent answer—

“Alright, let's have Miss Shouko with the answer!”

“...Everyday's our wedding anniversary.”

“DON'T SAY IT SHOUKO! I'LL BANG MY HEAD AGAINST THE WALL OUT OF EMBARRASSMENT!!”

“Brillant! That's the correct answer!”

That's the correct answer!?

I glare at the host; he actually glanced at me from an angle where the audience can't see him. What the heck! So this was pre-planned! Do you really want us to have a wedding experience?

Find then, if so—I'll show you my passion!

“Second question! Where was the wedding held?”

—Ding dong!

I quickly pressed the button down as I lean near the mic to say the correct answer. These questions aren't questions now, they're just interrogations. But it doesn't matter. If I give a wrong answer, that's nothing!

“Okay, will Mr Sakamoto Yuuji please answer!”

“Miso-stewed Mackerel!”

“Correct answer!”

“What?”

How can such a thing happen! You asked for the location, so how can my miso-stewed mackerel answer be correct!?

“The wedding of these two will be held in front of the phoenix in front of our Kisaragi hotel, also known as the 'Miso-stwed Mackerel'.

“Hold on! You just came up with this nickname, right!? There has to be a limit to this!”

“Third question! Where did the couple first meet?”

No way, they aren't listening to me...but if so, I can guess what they're thinking. I have to say the wrong answer this time. Got to be faster than Shouko and say the wrong answer—

“...Don't you think of doing that.”

—Pwoosh.

“OOOOWWWWW!!! MY EYESS! MMMYYY EEEEEYYYYEEEEESSSS!!!”

—Ding dong.

“Okay, will Miss Shouko answer?”

“...Elementary school.”

“Correct answer.! These two first met each other in elementary school, and after a long time of dating, they're finally about to be married today! Just an intimate pair of childhood friends!”

Didn't he just see my eyes getting poked hard? Since when has our relationship reached such an extent that it can be considered intimate!?

It's too late to answer the question after hearing it, so I have to get the right to answer before Shouko does. If so—

“Next, the fourth question!”

—Ding dong!

Before the host could say the answer, I already pressed the button. Now I can give an answer before being stopped! Though I don't know the question, I'll be 100% correct if I just answer 'I don't know'.

“I don't—”

“Correct answer! Up next, the last question!”
WOAH! He just ignored my answer! Did he give this reply because I ignored the question? I can't even answer a question wrongly now. Just as I'm thinking about giving up—

“Oi~ is there something wrong? We're also about to get married, why is it that only that high school couple can have such special treatment~”

The savior with the irritating tone has arrived.

Just as everyone start to look around for that guy who spoke, he walked up to the stage without anyone askign him to.

“Dear guests, we're having an event not. Sorry, but can you—”

“AHH? STOP YAPPING OVER THERE! WE'RE GUESTS, YOU UNDERTAND THE SITUATION!?”

The coffee-haired guy with piercings threatened the workers.

I actually wanted to mention that those two look familiar. So they're actually the delinquent couple that continued to pester the fake foreigner when we first entered.

“We have a wedding experience as well~”

“Bu, but, this—”

“DIDN'T WE TELL YOU TO STOP YAPPING ABOUT? WE WANT TO ENTER THE QUIZ SHOW. ARE YOU DUMB OR DID YOU NOT HEAR US!?”

“YEAH! HOW ABOUT THAT! WE'LL COME UP WITH THE QUESTION. IF THEY ANSWER IT CORRECTLY, THEY WIN. IF WE ANSWER IT WRONGLY, WE WIN!”

“How, how can it be—”

Ignoring the panicking workers, the delinquent couple stride onto the stage and grab a mic.

Once in a million chance! That host will definitely ignore my answer, but if it's these duo, I may have a chance to escape.

Next, I just need to prevent Shouko from answer...

“...Yu, Yuuji?”

I held Shouko's hand as I put my hand on the contestant's table. If so, she can't poke her fingers into my eye. Now all I need to do is just to give them a wrong answer, and everything will be OK!

“Okay, here's the question.”

The hoodlum deliberately rolls his tongue and says in a tone that's hard to hear out.

Come on, what's the question?
Relax, no matter how simple the question is, I can answer it wrongly—

“WHAT'S THE CAPITAL OF EUROPE?”

“...”

I can't even answer this.

“Oi, hurry up and answer! Don't you know?”

I really don't know what's the answer. In my memory, Europe was never designated as a 'country'. It's impossible to answer this question at all.

“...Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, congratulations on winning the 'Kisaragi Highlands' wedding experience' prize!”

“OI, hold up! These two haven't answered at all! We should be the winners, right?”

“How is that possible? Is that host an idiot!?”

As the idiotic couple continue to create a ruckus, the stage ended.

To think that there's a bigger idiot than Akihisa in this world...this world sure is huge.

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“Congratulations to you two to be able to win this free wedding experience. You two are lucky.”

“...I'm so happy.”

Once we walked out the restaurant, the fake foreigner immediately carries Shouko's bag as he walks towards us. Really, what lucky? You guys planned this right from the beginning.

“Oh yeah, Shouko, what's in your bag? Why is it so big?”

“...No, it's nothing...”

Shouko's reply seems to be a little troubled. What's going on?

However, this person here is someone who'll bring my important stamp around, so it's not strange to see her bring such a large bag.”

“Miss Shouko, for the wedding experience, can you please follow this worker and get ready?”

A 30+ woman walks up to us from behind the fake foreigner and bows to us. She looks just like a professional who specializes in dressing up wedding gowns on others.

“Hello, we've met for the first time. I'll be in charge of putting the wedding gown on this Miss here. For this event to be an unforgettable success, please allow me to help you dress up as the prettiest bride.”

The female worker smiles earnestly at Shouko.

Oi oi oi, aren't you playing it too seriously? You even got a specialist to come all the way here?

If so, Kisaragi Highlands wasn't planning to promote their facilities right from the start, but the wedding experience we're going to have? Seems like my time is wasted on this mock wedding.

“If so, don't I have to wait for quite some time?”

“Please rest assured, as for Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, we've already heard from Mr Yoshii—no, that's not right, we've already thought of the best way to deal with you.”

“There's no need to hide it now. Did Akihisa give you any instructions?”

I suddenly have a bad feeling about this.

“Yes, he said to use this on Mr Sakamoto Yuuji first.”

While saying this, he pulls out something that looks like a taser (200,000 volts)

“Because Mr Sakamoto Yuuji may think of escaping, Mr Yoshii's instruction is to use this taser to knock you out and then change you into the bridegroom's outfit.”

“A, AAAAAKKKKKKIIIIHHHHIIIIIIISSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!”

“Please endure this for a while.”

Before I can hear the terrifying bzzt sound from behind, I got knocked out just like that.

<center>☆</center>

“And now, we'll have the main event of today, the wedding experience! Will all guests please applaud the bridegroom!”

The loud applause seems like it covers the entire theme park. I thought that these guests were air to come here, but even the ordinary guests can't help but applaud on hearing this.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please stand on the stage.”

The fake foreigner who's standing on the stage whispered to me.

How about I try to beat this guy down and immediately run away?

“If you still want to resist, I'll put sea urchins and brown brushes together as a sashimi plate and send it over to you house.”
Uu! If that's sent to my house, my mum will think that they're all sea urchins and eat the brown brushes together...

“Really can't stand you...oh well, at least that's just an experience. I'll just play along...”

In order to let the fake foreigner relax, I deliberately said these words of giving up struggling in a voice loud enough for him to hear.

These guys must be planning to go all the way from exchanging rings to the oath and the kiss. They probably want to use this entire sequence to spread it out to the public and force Shouko and me to get married. But if society's to see this and find me with another girl, I'll get talked about. Frustrating, but a skillful way of forcing us to get married. To come up with such a plan—though they haven't considered the problem of misusing the image rights, the enemy's a famous enterprise, so they will have a way.

If so, I'll just have to escape before the oath is said, and best if everyone can see it. Maybe I can feign illness...they can only end this if they can't handle me. As long as I get away from here, it doesn't matter what happens later.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please head up the stage.”

“Okay okay.”

Dong dong dong, I climb up the slightly steep steps. When I got onto the stage, the scene in front of me makes me somewhat dizzy.

“Oi, that can't be it...what's with this setup!?”

What appeared in front of me are numerous lights and a full audience like a concert. Everything, the dry ice equipment, the balls and smoke are all set up. And there're all sorts of lighting experts around.

“And now, a brief introduction of the bridegroom's life—”

Oh? Introducing my life? That's not too different from a real wedding. Seems like even with the final goal in mind, they got every minor detail in place as well. The quiz show just now was the same as well. Seems like they got lots of details from Akihisa—

“—we'll ignore that.”

'''That's too shoddy!'''

“Haiz! No need to introduce him in the first place.”

“We have no interest in that in the first place~”

“We just need to know that there are people who aren’t worthy of being at our wedding place.”

“That’s right~”

The jerks sitting in front create such a ruckus.

The voices…so it’s that delinquent couple in the quiz show just now.

They’re in the front row, yet they continue to yap away like nobody’s business. These two’s etiquette are as lousy as their looks.

“…In order to avoid creating disturbance to the other guests, will those below the stage, please avoid creating a huge commotion.”

“Were they just talking about us?”

“No way, we’re guests!”

“You’re right~”

“Humph, even if they’re talking about us, we have no need to be mindful about that. The main thing is that we’re not satisfied. Isn’t that right, isn’t that more important?”

“That’s right, that’s right! Well said, Ryouta!”

The self-centred couple continue to increase their volume without any restraint.

The organizers should be really wishing that they can get rid of these meddlesome people, but these jerks that are making such a ruckus are tougher for them to handle. Since this is a promotional event, there’ll be no point to this is there’s negative feedback, so they can only leave those two alone.

“And now, the bride will be here.”

The BGM god deliberately louder as it reaches my ears, and all the lights are switched off. A light smoke rises from the feet, and it can’t be denied that there’s a wedding atmosphere here.

—Haha, it’ll be depressing if Shouko’s wearing a wedding gown that doesn’t suit her!

I’ll run away later. Since it’s like this now, it’ll be interesting to see Shouko in a wedding gown.

After making this decision, I decide to stay here. Before my eyes got used to the darkness, the spotlight lights up.

“Please welcome our female lead in this event, Miss Kirishima Shouko!”

With the audio broadcast, several lights are lit up as they all gather at a part of the stage. The darkness got instantly replaced by the light, forcing people to close teur eyes.

When I try to open my eyes, I see the figure—and is rendered speechless.

Seems like I’ve just met the childhood friend that I’ve known since young in quite a while—seeing her like this, I start to feel a little delusional.

She looks just like a real bride, standing elegantly over there. Who…is she?

“…So pretty.”

A voice can be heard from the silent crowd that’s utterly awestruck. I don’t know who said that, but those words reached my ears without any deterrence.

Maybe it’s because it was delicately made that the pure white gown doesn’t have a single crumple. The length of the skirt seems to nearly reach the floor, as it didn’t get stained while she was walking.

“…Yuuji…”

The face hidden under the wedding gown, my childhood friend, dressed in a silk dress seems to look uncomfortable as she looks up. The bouquet of flowers in her hands at chest level sways about slightly.

“Are you, Shouko…?”

“…Nn.”

My mind is utterly blank, and the question just came out even though I didn’t need to answer that. Maybe the change was so drastic that I had to confirm it.

Seeing me waver, Shouko asks in a somewhat shyly manner,

“…How is it…do, I look like a bride…?”

Maybe it’s because this girl looks like a stranger, or maybe it’s the atmosphere, or maybe it’s some other reason,; I just answered without thinking,

“—Um, no problems. At least no matter what, you don’t look like a bridegroom.”

The fleeting thought of ‘it’ll be depressing if Shouko’s wearing a wedding gown that doesn’t suit her’ got thrown far away. ‘You don’t look like a bridegroom’—I guess it’s a good job that I managed to at least say something.

“…Yuuji…”

Shouko called my name softly as she hugs the bouquet of flowers into her arms.

And then, she seems to be stunned as she remains rooted to the spot.

“Oi, oi, Shouko…?”

What’s wrong? She seems weird, was my answer weird?

Should I get over to her? I hesitate for a while. Just when I’m doing so, Shouko again says,

“…I’m so happy…”

The girl in front of me lowers her head and buries her face into the flowers.

She can no longer say anything more as she can only tremble silently.

“What, what’s going on? The bride seems to be crying?”

As if remembering his own job, the audio broadcast can be heard again.

Is she about to cry? I only noticed it when the host said it. Lowering her head, her shoulders trembling—Shouko’s crying silently in front of me.

“Oi, Shouko, what’s…”

The veil and the bouquet of flowers prevents me from seeing her face clearly. Why is she crying?

The originally silent audience starts to chatter loudly for some reason, and yet Shouko’s able to say to me in an audible voice,

“…Because…this has always been my dream…”

A hoarse voice reaches my ears.

“A dream, huh?”

“…Ever since I was little, I always dreamed of being Yuuji’s bride…always had this dream …of having a wedding that belongs only to Yuuji and me…but, I can’t possibly do it on my own, this dream of mine…”

The normally silent Shouko tries her best to say out some words, creating a weird feeling within me.

Because ‘that incident’ when we were young caused her to harbor affections only for me. The affections were merely supposed to be out of guilt and responsibility—but why must this person here remain so steadfast in her beliefs.

“…So…I’m really happy…to be able to do this, not with anybody else, but with Yuuji…”

Saying all the way till her, Shouko can no longer talk further as she weeps silently.

At this moment, the sound of someone blowing the nose can be heard. Is the audience touched to tears? Some people’s tear glands are really weak.

“So she’s actually crying out of happiness! Our bride here is still as focused as ever. How will the groom react to the bride’s confession?”

How should I respond? Do I need to say it? No matter the time or place, what I should do is to correct this person’s incorrect thinking.

Thinking about this—unbelievably, I can’t even utter a single word.

“Shouko, I—”

“Ah~ ah~ so boring~”

Just as I was about to finally say something, a loud voice can be heard from the audience. I immediately shut my mouth. Even though I don’t know what’s going on, maybe I got all dizzy or something. Maybe I can say that it was god’s grace to prevent me from saying something.

“Such a boring event~ forget about those boring things, can’t we have a performance or something~?”

“That’s right~ we have no interest in listening to your love story.”

Seems like the people who saved me were those two idiots. Their voices can be heard amongst the now silent crowd.

“Speaking of which, what 'being a bride was what I always wanted? Or what? Are you acting pure? Is this what the workers here to you to say? How idiotic is that? It's so disgusting it makes me sick!”

“Are you playing a pure love game? We don't want to waster our precious time on you people~ does that woman have a problem? I find it comical no matter how I hear it~”

“I know! That was a comedy just now right? That's right, where will there be anyone in this world with such a disgusting dream!?”

“Eh~ was that a comedy? It's really comical~”

Those two continue to mock Shouko one after another, but—

“WHAT DID YOU SAY!? SAY THAT AGAIN IF YOU DARE!!”

“AH, AKIHISA-KUN, PLEASE CALM DOWN! YOU'LL RUIN THIS EVENT IF YOU GET SO WORKED UP!”

The angry roar could be heard through the broadcast, and the sounds of violence can be heard from behind the stage. Seems like a certain idiot can't control his anger after hearing those words.

Where is he throwing his tantrum from? I turn my eyes from the couple below the stage to look behind.

But even though I took only a short glance—

“Wh-where's the bride? Where did the bride go?”

Shouko disappeared from the stage. What's left at the place where she was standing are a small bouquet of flowers and a wedding veil.

“..Sigh, really can't stand her.”

I picked up the veil that she threw onto the floor.

The veil that was supposedly as light as a feather now seems a lot heavier after being stained by Shouko's tears.

“Kirishima-san? Kirishima Shouko-san? Dear guests, please help us find the bride!”

The workers are now as anxious as ants on hot water.

Hm, seems like they have to end this wedding experience event. Now that the event they put so much effort in can only end as failure, those thick-skinned people at Kisaragi Highlands are definitely going pale.

“Mr, Mr Sakamoto! Please help us find the bride!”

One of the workers in the hall pants as he runs towards me, probably trying to ask me where that person ran off to.

“Sorry, I'll pass. It's troublesome, and I really want to go to the toilet.”

“Eh? Wa-wait a minute Mr Sakamoto!”

I turn around and leave while still hearing the cries of that worker, and he can only give up reluctantly after seeing me being unwilling to help. Really, if you have the time to ask me, how about you just search for yourself? That'll be faster right?

I get into the prepared crowd as I leave the hall. 5 minutes later, I found my target. Good thing they haven't gone too far off.

“Oh my, that was sooo funny~”

“Yeah, I always...dreamed of marrying you—how was it? Does it look like it? Is it cute?”

“Ahh, that was so like it. But—of course it's disgusting! Who will find it cute!?”

“Ya~”

Finally found them. Let's just settle this once and for all.

I slowly walk towards those two and said as I arrive behind them.

“Oi, you two.”

“Ahhh, what is it!?”

The coffee-colored faces of the two jerks turn to face me.

Those two are the ones who helped me and prevented me from falling into a human life grave. I really have to thank them.

“Ryouta, isn't this guy the one who acted as the groom?”

“Seems like it. WHAT DO YOU FAUX-GROOM WANT US FOR, SAY IT!”

The guy walked forward as he threatens me.

“Oh well, nothing much actually—”

I take off my western coat that I borrowed and loosen my tie. Unbelievable, my body's already so hot even without me doing any warm-ups

“—Let's just have a few words.”

<center>☆</center>

“Yo, you kept me waiting for quite a while.”

“...Yuuji.”

Standing in front of a hotel in Kisaragi Highlands, Shouko finally exits the passageway as she keeps her head down.

“Okay, time to go back.”

I help Shouko carry the large bag that she took back from the fake foreigner as we walk slowly towards the train station.

“...”

Shouko doesn't say anything at all as she silently follows me.

We silently walk down the path to the train station in this sunset.

I don't know how long we walked, but while we're walking that's pretty empty, Shouko finally asks softly,

“...Yuuji.”

“...What is it?”

“...Is my dream..weird?”

She must be bothered by the idiotic couple's mockery.

Shouko stopped, and though her head's lowered to prevent me from seeing her face, I can tell what her expression is.

“This, well, maybe it isn't ordinary.”

I chose my words carefully before making this reply.

“...”

Shouko again remains silent.

The reason why I answered like this is because in these not-so-short 7 years., she always harbored this one unshakeable dream as she stuck onto me. But now that her dream got mocked and denied in front of so many people, I can't even imagine how she feels.

But even so, I don't intend to lie just to comfort her.

“I'll use this chance to state this clearly, your feelings towards me are just derived from that past guilt you had.”

The event that happened 7 years ago was the key reason why Shouko thinks that she fell for me. Up till now, I'm still regretful of that incident. If I had handled it a little better, maybe it wouldn't have ended up like this.

Because of that, that person wasted her time on this useless bum here.

Thus, I have a need to tell her directly 'you're mistaken'—in order to prevent her from wasting time on such a thing.

“...Yuuji...”

Shouko gasped. Maybe this is a blow to her when I said this.

“But—”

But I have no need to hurt her. What's wrong is how this person here understands her feelings, but being able to harbo such feelings for just one person for this long is something she should be proud of.

So I have to tell her this. She isn't completely wrong, she just made a mistake in her target. However, her dream isn't wrong, and it's not strange at all.

“—But then, I won't laugh at your dream. Your dream is amazing, it won't lose to anyone, so you have to be confident of yourself.”

I put the thing that I picked up at the hall on Shouko, who has her head down.”

“However, you cannot mistake who you're going for.”

To have a wedding experience, it shouldn't be bad to have a memory like this, right?

“...This is...the headdress from...just now...”

Shouko reaches her hands out and receives the pure white headdress of the wedding gown as she lifts head head and stares at me in shock.

Seeing her so shocked, I suddenly feel somewhat awkward as I turn my head away.

Ah, now that I mentioned it, I have something else I have to tell her no matter what.

“Also, Shouko—”

I stare at the fading sunset and say softly—

“—The bento was delicious.”

I put the already lighter bag onto Shouko's hands.

“...Ah...my bento. Yuuji, you...notice...?”

“Okay, let's hurry up and head back. We'll be misunderstood if we stay out for far too long.”

“...Yuuji.”

“Especially my mom, no matter how I explain it—”

“Yuuji!”

It's been a while since I heard her speak so loudly, and I inadvertenly stop.

“What is it?”

I replied her call with my usual calm attitude.

Just as I tilt my head to face her, in the orange sunset, I see someone raising the headdress—”

“I didn't make a mistake after all!”

I see—my childhood friend smiling brightly at me.

<center>☆</center>

“Yo, Akihisa.”

Hm? Morning Yuuji, what's up?”

“You did quite a number to me at Kisaragi Highlands, huh?”

“Hahaha, what are you talking about? I was playing computer games at home the entire day, how can I possibly go to Kisaragi Highlands?”

“...Really? Well, you can act dumb all you want.”

“Wh, what are you saying? That's so weird~”

“Oh yeah, I got a present for you.”

“Eh? What is it?”

“This is a two-persons ticket to a highly-rated love story movie that's being aired right now. IF YOU HAVE 'SOMEONE YOU LIKE', JUST BRING HER OUT.”

I deliberately increase my volume for everyone in the classroom to hear.

“A two-persons ticket? Uu—even if you give me this, I don't really know who to ask.”

“So be it then.”

I stuff the ticket into Akihisa's hand and turns to walk away.

“Ah, Aki! I want to watch a movie this weekend~”

“Ah, Akihisa-kun! I just so happened to have a movie that I want to watch!”

“Eh? What's going on? Why do you two have such killing intent? I just want to pawn this ticket away for my daily funds—OWWWWW! THEY'RE ABOUT TO BE PULLED OUT! SEVERAL IMPORTANT PARTS OF MY BODY ARE GOING TO BE PULLED OUT BY YOU!!!”

The expected cries of anguish and pain can be heard from behind.

Really...who asked you to pull such a twisted plan in the first place, you big idiot.

<noinclude>
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|-
| Back to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_The Sakamoto Couple's Secret Love Technique Lecture|The Sakamoto Couple's Secret Love Technique Lecture]]
| Return to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Tsuchiya and Kudou's Mini Sex Life Story|Tsuchiya and Kudou's Mini Sex Life Story]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3.5 Me and Shouko and Kisaragi Highlands

2011-05-11T19:43:41Z

Caolsei:

==Me and Shouko and Kisaragi Highlands==

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 093.jpg|thumb|Me and Shouko and Kisaragi Highlands]]

“Akihisa.”

“Hm? Yuuji, what's up?

“I just thought of it, what will you do with those tickets?”

“Those tickets—are you talking about the free Kisaragi Highlands tickets?”

“Yeah, I remember that they have some trial run before they fully begin operations. Why don't you get Himeji to come along?”

“Wha, what are you saying, Yuuji!? If we use those tickets, the Kisaragi corporaion will use all their power of force those people who went to marry each other! Wouldn't Himeji-san be pitiful if it ends up like this?”

“That's sort of true. They did try their best to come up with that ill omen of 'any couple who goes there will gain happiness'. They probably put in lots of effort to make that a reality.”

“Mmm, that's the case.”

“However, I don't think Himeji will refuse.”

“...Eh?”

“Well, if you summon your courage and try to ask her out, I don't think she will really refuse.”

“Ah, ahhahaha, here we go again. Yuuji, you really love to make fun of me~ how can I possibly get married to Himeji-san? That's totally impossible.”

“Uuu~ since you said so, I'll leave it as that. Then, if you're not going, how are you going to use those tickers?”

“I just so happened to have someone who's about to get married, so I'll just send the tickets to that person.”

“Oh yeah, if someone wants to get married, the tickets will work extremely well. And if they can get married successfully, Kisaragi Corporation will be extremly happy.”

“Yeah, if it's successful, everyone will be happy.”

“Are those two who're getting married getting along well?”

“Nn, they just need an opportunity.”

“I see, it'll be great if they can get together.”

“Don't worry. They'll always be together.”

<center>☆</center>

On a certain holiday morning, the sunlight that seeps through the gaps of the blinds and the chirping of the sparrows woke me from my dream.

When I woke up—

“...Good morning, Yuuji.”

—I found Shouko standing beside my bed.

“...The weather today is good.”

Shouko pulls the blinds, causing the sunlight to shine brightly into my room.

“Hm? Ahh, seems good.”

The overly bright light causes me to narrow my eyes as I closely inspects the figure of my childhood friend.

As today's a holiday, she's not wearing the uniform. The top is a white long-sleeved knitted coat with a thin pink shirt underneath, and matching them at the bottom is a light knee length skirt. There's a piece of cloth meant to hide the interior it should be called an underskirt, right? Shouko would normally wear a T-shirt and jeans or shorts, so seems like she deliberately dolled herself up today.

I'm totally shocked that I actually checked through Shouko's attire, since it's not in my nature. Maybe I haven't woken up, right?

I shake my head hard to get rid of the sleepy sensation, and then turn to look at Shouko.

“I haven't greeted you yet. Morning, Shouko.”

“...Nn, morning.”

I pull my blanket aside and get off the bed.

Speaking of which, why did Shouko come to my room? Do I have a date with her or something?

I start to rack my just-woken-up brain—no good, I can't remember anything.

Since I can't think of anything, it means I don't have a date with her, right? I see.

“Sorry, Shouko, pass me my handphone.”

“...Are you going to make a call?”

“Mm, yeah.”

After receiving the phone that Shouko passed over, I press a few buttons.

If this person is in my room, this means—

“Ah, hello? Is this the police station?”

SHE'S AN INTRUDER!

<center>☆</center>

THOMP THOMP THOMP THOMP THOMP!! CRRRAAAAKKKK!!!

“MOM! TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON HERE!!”

“Oh my, Yuuji, good morning.”

After rushing into the kitchen, I saw my mom standing at the basin as she washes the dishes, even saying good morning to me energetically.

“WHAT MORNING!? WHY WAS SHOUKO IN MY ROOM!? I ENDED UP BEING TREATED BY THE POLICE AS SOME DELUDED MANIAC THAT CAN'T TELL WHAT'S 2-D AND 3-D!!!”

My childhood friend came into my room and called me up—when I said that, the reaction left a pain that won't ever be erased. What I can say is that even if I overslept, this is the greatest mistake I ever made in my entire life!

“...Eh?”

Hearing my complaints, those wide eyes of my mom blink quite a few times. She's almost 40, and yet this look is just like a kid. Maybe it's because of this natural doll-like face that my mom looks a lot younger than what she really is. 'People often mistook me for a college student'—that's was she herself said. However, my dad and I don't even believe this one bit. No matter what, she can't possibly be seen as a college student.

“You were talking about Shouko?”

Mom placed her hand on her face as she said that to me with a bothered look on her face.

Seeing her attitude...did Shouko sneak into my room? Mom didn't help out? If this were the case, I may have failed to think things through when I roared at her.”

“Ahh, nothing much, sorry for shouting at you early in the morning. I thought that mom helped her enter my room—”

“Really, Shouko's too naïve. I helped her create this opportunity, yet she didn't do anything, that's really a pi—oh my, Yuuji, why are you grabbing onto your mom's face?”

“SO YOU'RE THE ONE WHO DID THAT!!!”

Seems like I have to educate her on the common sense a mother should have.

“...Yuuji, you can't bully mom.”

“Shouko, don't say it. As a son, I have to re-educate this mother.”

Appearing later, Shouko tugged my arm as she tried to stop me. Speaking of which, it's rather weird when Shouko just said 'mom' with a different tone. However, I guess I shouldn't retort back at her for my own safety.

“...if you don't listen, I'm going to read this book with mom.”

Shouko pulled out an A4-sized book. Hm? That book...don't tell me—

“Hold, hold on a minute! That shouldn't be what girls should be reading! Hurry up and return it to me!”

Why on earth is it that book! That's the treasure trove that even Muttsulini would even cry over! She actually found it! This is bad! Speaking of which, how did she find it? I hid it in a place that even my mom couldn't find it even though she's living in the same house as me!”

“Oh my, Shouko, is that the secret book with the world history reference cover over it? Yuuji hid it in the double-layer 3rd drawer.”

I have never been so envious of Akihisa's live-alone lifestyle like now.

“I, I got it. I'll let go of mom now.”

I obediently let go of the death grip.

To actually force me to surrender with this trick. This is too despicable!

“...That's good. If so—”

Damn it! Once I get back my book, I'll hide it in a place where you two can't find it. I'll might as well lock it up in maximum security—

“...I'll only forgive you if you burn it.”

“Sorry Shouko, but no matter what, that isn't what one will do after forgiving, right?”

Normally, if I'm forgiven, I should have my book back.

“...Then I won't forgive you even if you burn this book.”

“Isn't there an option of not burning this?”

Though I knew her since elementary school, I will occasionally be unable to tell what the heck is going on with that person's mind.

“Hoho, you two still have quite the good relationship.”

having been released from the grip, my mom doesn't look panicked at all. She washes the last dish and wipes her hands off her apron. Such a carefree mother.

“I don't think we have quite the good relationship here...”

“Oh my, is that so?”

My mom still shows a smiley face. This mother will most likely say 'oh my, isn't that interesting' when she sees me knocked down by a car, right?

“Really, you two...speaking of which, what are you doing here, Shouko?”

“...Date.”

“Date? Do I have a date with you?”

“...Mm.”

Like usual Shouko nods her head as she pulls out a small piece of paper.

That seems to be some sort of ticket. Let me see, that is...

“Oh my, isn't that the Kisaragi Highlands trial ticket? And it says that it's a free experience. It should be a special ticket right? You're amazing Shouko, to be able to get such a ticket~”

“...A kind soul gave it to me.”

“Is that so? That's great~ Yuuji, who're you calling?”

“I got something to say to some scum.”

I first shut off the incoming display number of the handphone, and then dial Akihisa's number.

After a few seconds of dialling, that damned despicable foe picks up his phone with a casual tone.

“Hello hello? Who're you looking for?”

'''''“...............................I'M GOING TO KILL YOU.”'''''

“Eh? What! Who are you? That's really scar—(cuts off)”

Hearing the extremely awkward voice from the phone, I silently cut the phone line. At least I feel better now.

“...Let's go, Yuuji.”

Shouko grabbed my hand. Seems like she really wants to go.

“I don't want to even if I die.”

However, I definitely can't fulfil this wish of yours.

If it were just an ordinary tripe to a theme park, I might consider it a bit. However, that's an activity that Kisaragi Corporation planned, there's definitely something dangerous about it.

If I'm to go along with Shouko and drop into their trap, I'll definitely be forced to to get married with her. No matter what, I have to prevent this sort of thing from happening!

“Oh my, why are you so unwilling, Yuuji? Just go out and play with Shouko.”

My mom, who doesn't know anything at all, said it as if it were so easy.

“Obviously, I don't want to go because of many reasons.”

Only a few people, including Akihisa and me know of the Kisaragi Corporation's plan, and even Shouko, who's from the same school doesn't know anything about it. If she's to know of something like 'mobilizing the entire power of Kisaragi Corporation to force two people to marry', no matter what kind of dirty tactics she'll use, Shouko will definitely force me to join in, because she's that kind of a woman.

“...I want to go with Yuuji.”

It's been about 7 years since this person started to show her affections for me. No matter what I say, she wouldn't budge. In a certain sense, I really have to respect that unwavering will of hers.

That's the case, but I have to refuse, or else I'll really be forced to get married. No matter what, I don't want to marry in High school; I want to enjoy a few more years of my free life.

Okay, since this can't be helped, I'll have to say clearly 'Shouko, you better give up. Thus, I take a deep breath, and then say—

“Shouko.”

“I don't want.”

“You better give—”

Too fast! Way too fast! I only said her name!

“Shou, Shouko! Listen to me first...”

“...If you don't want to go no matter what—”

Overpowering my incomplete words, Shouko pulls out a small booklet from her bag.

“...Choose one.”

What Shouko pulled out was a marriage location recommendation book.

“Sorry, I have no idea how we ended up like this.”

“...You swore to me before that we'll get married if you break our promise.”

Why do I feel that the content of the promise was changed?

“Mommy feels that it's good to go overseas and get married, like Hawaii or some other foreign country~”

“Mom, why aren't you caring about what your own son thinks!?”

“...Yuuji, choose one. I'm going to book the venue.”

“Ah, Eruope seems rather good. Yuuji, which one do you think is good?”

“Uuu...”

No matter what I choose, it doesn't seem like I can avoid the issue of marriage. This scenario's way too precarious. But I'm not going to crumble due to this level of difficulty. Got to find a way to get away from it!

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“...I'm really too useless...”

After spending more than 2 hours on the train an don the bus, Shouko and I finally arrived in front of Kisaragi Highlands.

This, this couldn't be helped! If it's just Shouko, fine, but even my mum even agreed to us getting married enthusiastically! I had to get away from that delicate yet hard to define atmosphere! Who can blame me right now!

“...We're finally here.”

Shouko isn't even hiding her delight as she stares at the theme park in front of her.

Okay...seeing her so happy like this, guess it's worth bringing her here. Mm hum.

“Okay, Shouko, since we're already here—”

“...Mn.”

“Let's hurry up and go back.”

CRACK.

“...No, I must go in.”

“Hahaha, Shouko, my arm won't go in that direction.”

My arm got clamped down forcefully as I told Shouko while giving off cold sweat.

Damn it, my fingers are getting numb.

“...This is what couples will do.”

“Hold on Shouko! Are you thinking that this intimate act of holding hands isn't any different from surrendering?”

“?”

Seeing her head full of question marks, this woman's way too terrifying. She probably thinks that all the couples in the world will lock their arms together in order to keep this lovers around

“...Anyway, let's go in.”

“GUH! At least release my hand before going! My arm will really get twisted if this keeps up!”

As my left arm got taken as a hostage, I got dragged by Shouko to the entrance. Since today's a trial operation day before the real opening, we didn't wait long before arriving in front of the attendants.

“Welcome to Kisaragi Highlands!”

This youngster doesn't look like a Japanese, since he's smiling at us while saying that in a weird tone. He looks like an Asian alright, but I don't know if he's a Japanese.

“Today's our trail day. Do you two have an entrance ticket?”

“...Yea.”

Shouko produced that ticket from her pocket.

“Sorry, please excuse me.”

The attendant looked back at us after seeing that coupon, and the smile that was on his face is instantly frozen.

“...Can't this ticket be used?”

Seeing the attendant's expression change, Shouko starts to look rather worried.

“Nonono, this ticket can be used. However, please hold on~”

The attendant immediately whips out a handphone from his pocket as he starts to make a call to someone.

“—It's me. Those two are here. Prepare the wedding now, I'll think of a way to stop them.”

“Oi, hold on! What's with those inappropriate words!”

The youngster's expression immediately became rather scary. Is he a worker of that damned corporation that started all these?

“...Prepare the wedding?”

Shouko tilts her head in bewilderment. Since she doesn't know of what Kisaragi Corporation is planning, she must be feeling puzzled after hearing that 'Prepare Wedding'.

“Please don't mind, this is just a logistics problem.”

The attendant reverts back to his original smile in order to hide the situation, but no matter how I look that it, it's just too strange.

“Oi, wasn't your Japanese really fluent when you were talking on the phone?”

“O~ uu, Japanese is really tough, I don't know what you're saying~”

This guy really bugs me.

“Speaking of which, there's no need to prepare whatsoever wedding. Just let us go in and don't bother us.”

Thanks to the phone call just now, I know what they're planning. However, I'm not planning on letting them do whatever they want. If not, my entire life will be...

“Don't say that, please like us handle this and prepare a super duper wedding for you~”

“No need.”

“You must allow us no matter what.”

“No.”

“Please?”

“I refuse?”

“If you refuse, I'm going to send some rotten crayfish to your house!”

“NO! Our family will get food poisoning if that happens!”

My mum will definitely think that those are Ise shrimps. To actually make such a terrifying threat, this damned fake foreigner!

“Then, let's have a commemorative photo.”

“...Commemorative photo?”

“Yes, this will be a super matching imprint of a couple's love~”

“...Yuuji and I...match each other (blushes).”

Shouko started to blush because of this fake foreigner's nonsense.

“Sorry to keep you waiting. I have the camera here.”

At this moment, another worker's holding onto a camera with one hand as his cap is lowered.

Hm? I seem to have met this guy before. Isn't it too suspicious that he lowered his cap deliberately?

“You specially brought the camera here. Sorry to bother you, you've been a great help.”

The fake foreigner thanked as he received the camera. That's really suspicious! They aren't convenience store workers, is there a need to be so polite to each other in a theme park?

—Hm, let me try this.

“Sorry, I'm going to make a call.”

“Okay, please.”

I pulled out my phone and call this huge idiot named 'Yoshii Akihisa' while not showing my number.

Prrrr Prrrr.

“Ah, sorry, my phone rang.”

Once the phone rang, the butt pocket of the guy who brought the camera over rang.

Success!

''“Yo~ Akihisa, you sure found it interesting, right?”''

“You got the wrong person!”

Dash!

“Ah, damn it! You dare to run away? Let go of me, you fake foreigner!”

“He's one of our workers here, the name's Elizabeth Hanako (35 years old), also known as Steve. He's definitely not called Yoshii or something,”

“Shut up! You actually came up with such a ridiculous name and age without flinching! And no matter what, that sort of name can't possibly be called Steve! Speaking of which, I never called that guy by his surname Yoshii, right?”

Akihisa got away while I was held up by the fake foreigner.

That damned Itsuki's definitely trying to set me up...what is he treating my life as! Is he thinking about payback?

But isn't it too much to actually act as a worker here? This doesn't seem like Akihisa's working alone.

That old granny---let me repeat that again, the principal helped out as well, right? Since that damned old granny's indebted to him, she probably won't refuse.

No, not just the old granny, even the rest should be involved.

“Sorry Shouko, but just endure this for a while.”

“?”

I reach my hand out to grab the stunned Shouko's skirt and lift it up slight—to the length where her underwear can be seen.

“...(Flash)!”

At that moment, from the corner of my eyes, I caught a figure reach his arms and clutch in front of his chest

—Anyway, it's just a guy who's wearing a fox costume.

“To reach his arms quickly in and clutch in front of his chest for a digital camera...even Muttsulini's heee?”

After exchanging glances with me, that fox mascot immediately disappeared agilely like a rabbit.

Since Akihisa and Muttsulini are around, then Hideyoshi and and Himeji should be around somewhere. Really, these guys...why are they so tireless when it comes to other people's misfortune!

“...Yuuji, ecchi.”

Just as I'm wondering how to punish them, I noticed that Shouko's staring at me rather angrily.

“What? You, you're mistaken! I'm not interested in you underwear at all!”

“...I'll be bothered if that's the case.”

“GUUAAHHH!! THAT'S COMPLETELY UNREASONABLE!!!”

Shouko stretched her arm and grabbed my skull.I seem to hear my own bone cracking.

“Okay, it's now time to take the photo. Say cheese.”

The light start to flash nearby, and then an electronic sound can be heard.

“We'll print it immediately, so please wait for us here.”

“...I know, I'll be waiting for you in this position.”

“GUUAHH!! IF YOU MAINTAIN THIS POSITION, MY SKULL WILL...”

Born with an ever honest personality, Shouko didn't even let go as she continues to wait in this position.

Does she really like me?

“It's done. Please take this.”

After a short while, the fake foreigner came back with the photo, and I got released.

“...Thank you.”

Shouko received the photo over happily.

“...Look, Yuuji, this is our memory.”

Shouko said this as she brought the photo right in front of me, who's coughing now.

“What's with this photo!”

The image taken was actually the back of Shouko's head and me being executed painfully. Also—

“I added a special touch for you, you know.”

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The special touch was adding a heart-shaped frame around our photo and adding the words, "We're about to get married".

Surrounding the woman who let out the claw of Heaven and the guy who was suffering because of it. To the unsuspecting folks, they should be wondering what happened between those two that cause them to end up in marriage...but no matter how I look at it, there can never be happiness between these two!

“Can I hang this up in our theme park photo room?”

“Are you still normal? What's the benefit of having such a photo as a decoration?”

Any customer who sees this will definitely retreat.

"...Are you embarrassed, Yuuji?”

“Sorry, but no matter how I look at this, this photo doesn't seem to warrant any need for me to be embarrassed."

Just as I was looking at this ridiculous photo and about to say this—

“Ahh! Someone's taking a photo! Let's get them to take a photo for us~”

“As a wedding commemoration photo of us? That's cool. Oi, you're a worker here, right? Help us take a photo!!”

The arrogant delinquent couple shouted as they head towards us.

“Sorry, but this couple is targeted by the corporation's plan...”

The fake foreigner refused. Seems like this photo is another scheme in the corporation's plan, and only we're entitled to it.

“What are you saying? Is there anything wrong with it? We're customers, you understand!?”

“Waa~ Ryouta's so cool~~”

The man glares angrily a the fake foreigner as he looks from below to top. Seems like this guy's really a delinquent. The woman's who's excited about this guy's roguishness probably has a screw loose or something.

“And our photo should be more attractive compared to those old-fashioned brats, right?

“That's right, compared to that dumb guy, my Ryouta's 100 times cooler than him!”

Never mind, I'll slip away while that delinquent couple's distracted.

“....(tatatatata).”

“Eh Oi, Shouko, where're you going?”

I grabbed Shouko's wrist just as she's angrily charing that the couple.

“...Those two just insulted Yuuji.”

“I say, you... If we're to bother about this, we won't be able to end this.”

We'll definitely not end up with something good if we're to clash with those guys. Besides, no matter what they say, I won't even care about it. Just seeing them is enough to irritate me.

“Let's go, Shouko.”

“...Since Yuuji said so...”

Seems like Shouko doesn't want to see them as well, as she followed after I told her.

“Ahhh! If you continue to drag on like this, I'll report to the media that your customer service is atrocious, you hear me!?”

“That's right~ we're customers!!”

The delinquent couple behind us continue to shout.

The promotional event actually got such customers here. Kisaragi Highland's really unlucky.

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“Okay then, let's go home after we walk around.”

“...We must walk around happily.”

Like what was advertised, the theme park has all sorts of the latest games, from the 3D-effects gaming equipment to the horrifying roller coast, coffee cups, carousels. There are even some attractions with things imagine even with the outer appearances.”

“It'll be easier if there's a cinema somewhere here.”

“...It's rare for us to come by, that won't do.”

My proposal got rejected by Shouko. Though it's troublesome, I'm trying to find an attraction that won't make both sides awkward. At this moment, a mascot came to us while looking like it's going to fall. She seems similar to that fox mascot just now, except in a different outfit. And this one has a large butterfly knot on it, so it should be a female, right?

“Onii-chan, Phi Phi will introduce you to some interesting attractions!”

A youthful girl's voice can be heard from below the mascot, and it seems like it doesn't have a voice changer, since it seems like a normal person...or rather, this is a familiar voice. Am I thinking too much? Why do I feel that this sounds like a certain honor student from our class.

Seems like I have to check it out.

“Speaking of which, the female college student who's working part-time is dating Akihisa to a movie.”

“Ehh, are you talking about Akihisa-kun? Where did you see that?”

These guys actually came here...

“Oi, Himeji! You're here to help?”

“Ah! You, you're mistaken! I—no, Phi Phi isn't called Himeji! As you can see, Phi Phi is a fox girl!”

To actually think of a way to force her way out of this, Himeji's a really serious person.

“Okay Phi Phi, then let's see you introduce the place.”

“Ah? Oh, mm! Phi Phi recommends the haunted house directly opposite.”

Himeji—no, Phi Phi stretched her hand out and points to a building on the other side of the fountain. Hm, so it's the famous haunted house that was built from an abandoned hospital?

“Really, thanks.”

“No problems. Enjoy yourself.”

“Oh, Shouko, let's go to 'some place other than the haunted house'.”

I push Shouko from behind. The moment I said this, Himeji immediately pulled my wrist.

“Wai wai wai wai wait! Why are you not going to the recommended place!”

“You dare to ask me why! I can tell from you tone that there's some trap inside to make fun of me right? I'm not going to go on a suicide run.”

No matter how good her grades is, Himeji really can't fool anyone. She immediately revealed their plan accidentally.

“I, I'll be really bothered! Please, please go there!”

“I refuse.”

I don't want to sell my life away for just her request! I must refuse no matter what, I got a good freedom of youth ahead of me!

“Please~ you'll definitely find the ghost house interesting!”

“I, DON'T, WANT!”

I ignore Himeji, who's tugging at me. However, she continues to tug at me as I drag her. That's really troublesome. Just as I intend to shrug her away, something seems to be heading for us.

“End of the line, Yuuji—no, the ugly guy over there!”

“These dumb movements...is it Akihisa?”

Appearing in a dumb manner is the male mascot I just found. What the heck, a change of costumes?

“How rude! I—no, wait, since when is Noi Noi dumb?”

“Shut up! What's wrong with calling out an idiot who's wearing the mascot head the other way around!”

What's supposed to be a cute and cuddly doll now has its head turned backwards because of Akihisa, and now it's a bone-chilling creature.

“...Yuuji, Noi Noi's just a kid.”

“Shouko, a creature that can put the head wrongly will be annihilated by society.”

You'll die if you don't watch yourself. An existence like him can only exist at the bottom of the food chain.

“Ah, Akihisa-kun, your head's turned backwards! Ahh! The kids were crying once they saw you!”

“Wah, this isn't good! No wonder I can't see what's in front!”

“Hurry up and put the head properly, or Sakamoto-kun will find out!”

To think that you can actually fool me till now, these two are really a match for each other.

“Ah, sorry to keep you waiting.”

An even more troublesome person is here—the fake foreigner from just now. To think that he actually caught up to us so quickly.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please head to the haunted house.”

“Didn't I say that I don't want to!?”

I don't want to deliberately enter that dangerous place.

“If you refuse, I'll send a large amount of food to your house.”

“Don't do that! If you do, my family's lives will be at risk!”

My mum won't even bother about what to do unless we finish up all the food. How can this guy be so vicious?

“Speaking of which, Akihisa-kun, who's the female university student who was with you? To think that you have the time to chase after other girls even during this important situation...”

“Eh? What are you talking about? I never—hm? Why are you taking you phone out? Who're you calling here?”

“I think Minami will be here soon. Before that, please explain clearly.”

“No, no way! If there's a bloodshed incident on opening day, the ratings of this theme park will—GYYAH! I feel that someone's rushing at me angrily! I'll do anything, kneel, beg for forgiveness, just don't kill me!!”

The two fantasy creatures are having a couple's quarrel. What an unbelievable scene.

“Miss Sakamoto Shouko, you may hug your boyfriend when you enter the haunted house in any way that you want.”

“...Yuuji, I want to go.”

“You're really despicable. Actually thinking of using Shouko to force me into the trap! And who asked you to randomly change Shouko's surname! Her surname's Kirishima!”

“...Don't worry, it'll become Sakamoto soon.”

Without noticing it, Shouko again controls my arm. If so, I can't resist!

“Okay, then please sign here.”

The fake foreigner pulls out a document and a pen. What's this?

“Just an ordinary consent form.”

We're just entering a haunted house. Is there really a need to sign a consent form? Is it really that dangerous inside?

“Seems interesting.”

Since there's a consent form, it should mean that there's something that's really scary inside. Maybe it's really interesting.

I'm starting to feel a little interested as I get ready to sign that consent form with the ball-point pen.

'Consent form'

1. I—Sakamoto Yuuji swear to take Kirishima Shouko as my wife, through thick and thin, loving each other for the rest of our lives.
2. I swear that we will get married at Kisaragi Highlands.
3. No matter what happens, I will never leave Kirishima Shouko.

“...Here, Yuuji, here's the seal.”

“The inkpad's here.”

“Am I the only one? Am I the only one who finds this completely ridiculous!?”

These guys are crazy!

“That's a joke. There's no need to sign this, you can just go in.”

“...mn, just joking.”

“You guys prepared the carbon papers, and you actually dare say that you're joking!”

I really have a lot of things to say, but isn't their common sense too cruel or something?

“It'll be rather inconvenient to bring that huge bag around. I'll keep it for you.”

“...Sorry to bother you.”

Shouko hands her bag over to the fake foreigner. Speaking of which, her bag's really huge.

“...The contents inside may spillover, so please don't put it horizontally.”

“You're talking about this bag? I understand, please don't worry.”

Spill out? What's inside that bag?

“Then enjoy to you hearts' content.”

“...Let's go, Yuuji.”

“OWOWOWOWOW! MY ARM'S GOING TO GET TWISTED BY YOU!”

My resistance ends up useless, and after a while, I got dragged by her to the entrance of the haunted house. Did they deliberately try to create the atmosphere? The haunted house has automatic sliding doors, but there's not a single light inside. It feels like someone's making some moves.

“It's me. The prey has already entered the haunted house. We'll start with the plan that Mr Yoshii came up with.”

Before the auto-door closed, I could hear the fake foreigner say that.

So Akihisa came up with the plan? I don't know what's going on, but I won't let that guy get what he wants!

Shouko and I continue to walk down this dark corridor. Kk, kk...the the footsteps on the linoleum's a lot clearer than what I expected.

“As expected of a haunted house that's modified from an abandoned hospital, this sure is rare.”

“...It's a bit scary.”

“It's really rare for you to be afraid even though there's nothing.”

“...Maybe.”

We continue to move on in the directions mapped out by the sign 'move forward'.

There's nothing on the 1st level, and so we head upstairs. Before we can take a few steps, there finally seems to be something going on.

“—fer—ji—”

With a heart chilling wind, a distorted voice can be heard.

Hm? Is this a cry of agony?

“...Is this voice...Yuuji?”

“Hm? Is that so?”

The voice does sound similar to mine. Most likely, Hideyoshi's imitating my voice.

To hear my own voice without me even speaking, it does feel scary. I thought that Akihisa's plan will be rather simple or something—

“I prefer Himeji to Shouko, and her breasts are bigger.”

“...Yuuji, are you ready?”

“Scary! Shouko's face actually became like a Hannya! That's super thrilling!”

How did that damned Akihisa think of such a terrifying method! Is he planning not not letting me escape here alive!?

Just as I'm getting worried, I suddenly hear some sort of mechanism being activated.

Great! Well done! I can protect my own life now.

“Ah, Shouko! Something seemed to have appeared!”

Turning to where the sound came from, something appeared at the originally empty place . That is—

“...How kind of them.”

—A mace?

That damned Akihisa! He actually prepared everything! Though they messed up on how it's supposed to be scary, this is one super duper scary haunted house!”

“...Yuuji, where are you going to escape to?”

Wielding the mace, my childhood friend came pursuing after me in this new method of playing, and I got chased for an entire hour.

However, does Akihisa really think that this will bring Shouko and me together?

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I continued to escape as I tried to explain to Shouko that Hideyoshi was mimicking my voice, and finally managed to calm her down and bring her out from the house.

“It's been tough on you! How about that? Do you two feel like getting married?”

“Only you and that idiot Akihisa will think this will make us get married...”

Forget about creating a gap between us, I'm feeling that the divide between me and Shouko just got wider.

“That's strange? I though those couples who pass through adversity together won't have such a problem with each other...”

“Well, ya, it would have been possible if the crisis didn't come from the ones who should be together...”

This fake foreigner's brain shouldn't be any different from Akihisa, right?

But now at least I can relax a bit. If it's a plan Akihisa came up with, there wouldn't be any delinquents coming up to threaten or extort me. If so, I don't have to keep thinking of ways to escape...how troublesome. If possible, I really want to go home now.

“...About time to eat lunch.”

Shouko stares above the fountain as she mutters. The large clock that's in that direction indicates that it's 1pm. That's right, it's about time to eat.

“...That, my bag--”

“Yes, we prepared a deluxe meal for both guests. Please follow me.”

The fake foreigner walks away after saying this.

They actually prepared lunch for us. That entrance ticket sure isn't for show.

“What's wrong, Shouko?”

“...Nothing.”

“?”
What's with that lonely look on her face out of a sudden?

“...Yuuji, if we don't hurry up, we won't be able to catch up with him.”
“Hm, you're right.”

Maybe believing that we will follow him, the fake foreigner has already walked quite some distance. Well, since he said that they prepared a meal for us, we'll let him treat us.

I hurriedly walk away, and after a walk, what appears in front of me is a trendy-looking restaurant.

“Please enjoy the meal that we'll be preparing for you here.”

Immediately, the fake foreigner ushered us into a wide hall that seems like a party hall.

There's a round table right in the middle, and there is also a stage and some small tables. The atmosphere now doesn't look like a restaurant, but like a—

“...A quiz show?”

That's right, though there's a lot of luxurious food on the table, this is basically a quiz show that we always see on TV.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, welcome.”

Am attendant walks over as he leads us to our seats—what the hack, I know this guy too!

“Why are you dressed up as an attendant, Hideyoshi?”

“Hideyoshi? What are you talking about?”

My classmate shows a poker face. Has this guy gotten into character? Seems like it's hard to rip this guy's mask off.

I'll just use the useful tool that I used on Akihisa!

“Since you deny it, I'll just confirm it.”

I pull out my phone and look for a name in the phonebook called 'Kinoshita Hideyoshi'. But before I could press the call button, the attendant beside me immediately took action.

“Ah, my phone slip!”

Hideyoshi (?) pulls out his phone and threw it hard at the fountain. Ploop, the sound of something landing in the water can be heard.

“Is, is there a need to go to such an extent? Your phone will definitely spoil!”

“I don't understand what you're saying.”

Hideyoshi continues to give me the poke face.

Even if he doesn't really use it, to throw the handphone away without a second thought....the enemy's thoroughly into character.

“Then, if you allow me, please.”

“Ah, ooh...”

We're led by the attendant to the center of the hall.

“As the two guests are underaged, we've prepared these drinks for you.”

After we sat down, the attendant pours some non-alcoholic champagne into our glasses, not even forgetting to introduce us the brand of this champagne. He's really into it, as expected of someone from the drama society.

“Please enjoy your appetiser.”

After putting down the glasses the dishes are served onto this table. Seeing the luxurious food that's only the appetiser, I can only grimace that I'm not used to holding a fork and a knife.

Speaking of which, Shouko should be rather used to this sort of cuisine, right?

Until we finished eating, there doesn't seem to be any traps around. Just as I thought that I can heave a sigh of relief—

“Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for attending this trial trip of Kisaragi Highlands's before it officially opens!”

A loud voice booms throughout the entire hall.
“Actually, in this hall today, there will be a wedding experience event to prepare a high school couple!”

Some of the drink I just gulped down accidentally sputtered out of the nose.

“We at Kisaragi Corporation wish to encourage this couple and created such a scheme! The scheme is called the 'Kisaragi Highlands wedding experience' quiz show~

a heavy sound of the entrance being locked can be heard from the entrance. To actually cut off my escape route, damn you Akihisa! Seems like you have grasped how I would think!

“The content of this scheme is simple. You just need to answer all the 5 provided questions to enjoy the wedding of the highest class! Of course, if you wish, there's no problems with directly registering as a couple.”

That's a huge problem, you big idiot.

“Then Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, please stand on the stage in front!”

As the host earnestly pointed in our direction, everyone in the restaurant turned around to look at us.

“...A wedding experience...I'll do my best!”

“Calm down Shouko. A wedding has to be agreed by both sides—OWWWWW!!! MY EARS ARE ABOUT TO BE RIPPED OFF! I'LL GO! I'LL GO! JUST LET ME GO!”

I continue to keep telling myself that this is just an experience, but I still feel unhappy as I step on on the stage.

With the workers leading us, Shouko and I are assigned to our seats.

“Okay, the 'Kisaragi Highlands wedding experience' quiz show begins now!”

There's a huge button between Shouko and me, and it seems like a standard answering system where we have to press the button before answering.

Well...if I get the answer correct, I'll get a prize, but if I answer a few questions wrongly, this event will be a bust, right? Seems like I'll just have to keep answering wrongly.

“And the first question is up!”

I reach my hand out for the button as I wait for the question.

Come on, show me what questions you have...

“When is Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko's wedding anniversary?”

That's too strange! I don't even understand what this question is about!?

—Ding dong!

Damn it! Before I even noticed, Shouko actually pressed the button. But even if it's Shouko, she can't possibly answer a question that has a non-existent answer—

“Alright, let's have Miss Shouko with the answer!”

“...Everyday's our wedding anniversary.”

“DON'T SAY IT SHOUKO! I'LL BANG MY HEAD AGAINST THE WALL OUT OF EMBARRASSMENT!!”

“Brillant! That's the correct answer!”

That's the correct answer!?

I glare at the host; he actually glanced at me from an angle where the audience can't see him. What the heck! So this was pre-planned! Do you really want us to have a wedding experience?

Find then, if so—I'll show you my passion!

“Second question! Where was the wedding held?”

—Ding dong!

I quickly pressed the button down as I lean near the mic to say the correct answer. These questions aren't questions now, they're just interrogations. But it doesn't matter. If I give a wrong answer, that's nothing!

“Okay, will Mr Sakamoto Yuuji please answer!”

“Miso-stewed Mackerel!”

“Correct answer!”

“What?”

How can such a thing happen! You asked for the location, so how can my miso-stewed mackerel answer be correct!?

“The wedding of these two will be held in front of the phoenix in front of our Kisaragi hotel, also known as the 'Miso-stwed Mackerel'.

“Hold on! You just came up with this nickname, right!? There has to be a limit to this!”

“Third question! Where did the couple first meet?”

No way, they aren't listening to me...but if so, I can guess what they're thinking. I have to say the wrong answer this time. Got to be faster than Shouko and say the wrong answer—

“...Don't you think of doing that.”

—Pwoosh.

“OOOOWWWWW!!! MY EYESS! MMMYYY EEEEEYYYYEEEEESSSS!!!”

—Ding dong.

“Okay, will Miss Shouko answer?”

“...Elementary school.”

“Correct answer.! These two first met each other in elementary school, and after a long time of dating, they're finally about to be married today! Just an intimate pair of childhood friends!”

Didn't he just see my eyes getting poked hard? Since when has our relationship reached such an extent that it can be considered intimate!?

It's too late to answer the question after hearing it, so I have to get the right to answer before Shouko does. If so—

“Next, the fourth question!”

—Ding dong!

Before the host could say the answer, I already pressed the button. Now I can give an answer before being stopped! Though I don't know the question, I'll be 100% correct if I just answer 'I don't know'.

“I don't—”

“Correct answer! Up next, the last question!”
WOAH! He just ignored my answer! Did he give this reply because I ignored the question? I can't even answer a question wrongly now. Just as I'm thinking about giving up—

“Oi~ is there something wrong? We're also about to get married, why is it that only that high school couple can have such special treatment~”

The savior with the irritating tone has arrived.

Just as everyone start to look around for that guy who spoke, he walked up to the stage without anyone askign him to.

“Dear guests, we're having an event not. Sorry, but can you—”

“AHH? STOP YAPPING OVER THERE! WE'RE GUESTS, YOU UNDERTAND THE SITUATION!?”

The coffee-haired guy with piercings threatened the workers.

I actually wanted to mention that those two look familiar. So they're actually the delinquent couple that continued to pester the fake foreigner when we first entered.

“We have a wedding experience as well~”

“Bu, but, this—”

“DIDN'T WE TELL YOU TO STOP YAPPING ABOUT? WE WANT TO ENTER THE QUIZ SHOW. ARE YOU DUMB OR DID YOU NOT HEAR US!?”

“YEAH! HOW ABOUT THAT! WE'LL COME UP WITH THE QUESTION. IF THEY ANSWER IT CORRECTLY, THEY WIN. IF WE ANSWER IT WRONGLY, WE WIN!”

“How, how can it be—”

Ignoring the panicking workers, the delinquent couple stride onto the stage and grab a mic.

Once in a million chance! That host will definitely ignore my answer, but if it's these duo, I may have a chance to escape.

Next, I just need to prevent Shouko from answer...

“...Yu, Yuuji?”

I held Shouko's hand as I put my hand on the contestant's table. If so, she can't poke her fingers into my eye. Now all I need to do is just to give them a wrong answer, and everything will be OK!

“Okay, here's the question.”

The hoodlum deliberately rolls his tongue and says in a tone that's hard to hear out.

Come on, what's the question?
Relax, no matter how simple the question is, I can answer it wrongly—

“WHAT'S THE CAPITAL OF EUROPE?”

“...”

I can't even answer this.

“Oi, hurry up and answer! Don't you know?”

I really don't know what's the answer. In my memory, Europe was never designated as a 'country'. It's impossible to answer this question at all.

“...Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, congratulations on winning the 'Kisaragi Highlands' wedding experience' prize!”

“OI, hold up! These two haven't answered at all! We should be the winners, right?”

“How is that possible? Is that host an idiot!?”

As the idiotic couple continue to create a ruckus, the stage ended.

To think that there's a bigger idiot than Akihisa in this world...this world sure is huge.

<center>☆</center>

“Congratulations to you two to be able to win this free wedding experience. You two are lucky.”

“...I'm so happy.”

Once we walked out the restaurant, the fake foreigner immediately carries Shouko's bag as he walks towards us. Really, what lucky? You guys planned this right from the beginning.

“Oh yeah, Shouko, what's in your bag? Why is it so big?”

“...No, it's nothing...”

Shouko's reply seems to be a little troubled. What's going on?

However, this person here is someone who'll bring my important stamp around, so it's not strange to see her bring such a large bag.”

“Miss Shouko, for the wedding experience, can you please follow this worker and get ready?”

A 30+ woman walks up to us from behind the fake foreigner and bows to us. She looks just like a professional who specializes in dressing up wedding gowns on others.

“Hello, we've met for the first time. I'll be in charge of putting the wedding gown on this Miss here. For this event to be an unforgettable success, please allow me to help you dress up as the prettiest bride.”

The female worker smiles earnestly at Shouko.

Oi oi oi, aren't you playing it too seriously? You even got a specialist to come all the way here?

If so, Kisaragi Highlands wasn't planning to promote their facilities right from the start, but the wedding experience we're going to have? Seems like my time is wasted on this mock wedding.

“If so, don't I have to wait for quite some time?”

“Please rest assured, as for Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, we've already heard from Mr Yoshii—no, that's not right, we've already thought of the best way to deal with you.”

“There's no need to hide it now. Did Akihisa give you any instructions?”

I suddenly have a bad feeling about this.

“Yes, he said to use this on Mr Sakamoto Yuuji first.”

While saying this, he pulls out something that looks like a taser (200,000 volts)

“Because Mr Sakamoto Yuuji may think of escaping, Mr Yoshii's instruction is to use this taser to knock you out and then change you into the bridegroom's outfit.”

“A, AAAAAKKKKKKIIIIHHHHIIIIIIISSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!”

“Please endure this for a while.”

Before I can hear the terrifying bzzt sound from behind, I got knocked out just like that.

<center>☆</center>

“And now, we'll have the main event of today, the wedding experience! Will all guests please applaud the bridegroom!”

The loud applause seems like it covers the entire theme park. I thought that these guests were air to come here, but even the ordinary guests can't help but applaud on hearing this.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please stand on the stage.”

The fake foreigner who's standing on the stage whispered to me.

How about I try to beat this guy down and immediately run away?

“If you still want to resist, I'll put sea urchins and brown brushes together as a sashimi plate and send it over to you house.”
Uu! If that's sent to my house, my mum will think that they're all sea urchins and eat the brown brushes together...

“Really can't stand you...oh well, at least that's just an experience. I'll just play along...”

In order to let the fake foreigner relax, I deliberately said these words of giving up struggling in a voice loud enough for him to hear.

These guys must be planning to go all the way from exchanging rings to the oath and the kiss. They probably want to use this entire sequence to spread it out to the public and force Shouko and me to get married. But if society's to see this and find me with another girl, I'll get talked about. Frustrating, but a skillful way of forcing us to get married. To come up with such a plan—though they haven't considered the problem of misusing the image rights, the enemy's a famous enterprise, so they will have a way.

If so, I'll just have to escape before the oath is said, and best if everyone can see it. Maybe I can feign illness...they can only end this if they can't handle me. As long as I get away from here, it doesn't matter what happens later.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please head up the stage.”

“Okay okay.”

Dong dong dong, I climb up the slightly steep steps. When I got onto the stage, the scene in front of me makes me somewhat dizzy.

“Oi, that can't be it...what's with this setup!?”

What appeared in front of me are numerous lights and a full audience like a concert. Everything, the dry ice equipment, the balls and smoke are all set up. And there're all sorts of lighting experts around.

“And now, a brief introduction of the bridegroom's life—”

Oh? Introducing my life? That's not too different from a real wedding. Seems like even with the final goal in mind, they got every minor detail in place as well. The quiz show just now was the same as well. Seems like they got lots of details from Akihisa—

“—we'll ignore that.”

'''That's too shoddy!'''

“Haiz! No need to introduce him in the first place.”

“We have no interest in that in the first place~”

“We just need to know that there are people who aren’t worthy of being at our wedding place.”

“That’s right~”

The jerks sitting in front create such a ruckus.

The voices…so it’s that delinquent couple in the quiz show just now.

They’re in the front row, yet they continue to yap away like nobody’s business. These two’s etiquette are as lousy as their looks.

“…In order to avoid creating disturbance to the other guests, will those below the stage, please avoid creating a huge commotion.”

“Were they just talking about us?”

“No way, we’re guests!”

“You’re right~”

“Humph, even if they’re talking about us, we have no need to be mindful about that. The main thing is that we’re not satisfied. Isn’t that right, isn’t that more important?”

“That’s right, that’s right! Well said, Ryouta!”

The self-centred couple continue to increase their volume without any restraint.

The organizers should be really wishing that they can get rid of these meddlesome people, but these jerks that are making such a ruckus are tougher for them to handle. Since this is a promotional event, there’ll be no point to this is there’s negative feedback, so they can only leave those two alone.

“And now, the bride will be here.”

The BGM god deliberately louder as it reaches my ears, and all the lights are switched off. A light smoke rises from the feet, and it can’t be denied that there’s a wedding atmosphere here.

—Haha, it’ll be depressing if Shouko’s wearing a wedding gown that doesn’t suit her!

I’ll run away later. Since it’s like this now, it’ll be interesting to see Shouko in a wedding gown.

After making this decision, I decide to stay here. Before my eyes got used to the darkness, the spotlight lights up.

“Please welcome our female lead in this event, Miss Kirishima Shouko!”

With the audio broadcast, several lights are lit up as they all gather at a part of the stage. The darkness got instantly replaced by the light, forcing people to close teur eyes.

When I try to open my eyes, I see the figure—and is rendered speechless.

Seems like I’ve just met the childhood friend that I’ve known since young in quite a while—seeing her like this, I start to feel a little delusional.

She looks just like a real bride, standing elegantly over there. Who…is she?

“…So pretty.”

A voice can be heard from the silent crowd that’s utterly awestruck. I don’t know who said that, but those words reached my ears without any deterrence.

Maybe it’s because it was delicately made that the pure white gown doesn’t have a single crumple. The length of the skirt seems to nearly reach the floor, as it didn’t get stained while she was walking.

“…Yuuji…”

The face hidden under the wedding gown, my childhood friend, dressed in a silk dress seems to look uncomfortable as she looks up. The bouquet of flowers in her hands at chest level sways about slightly.

“Are you, Shouko…?”

“…Nn.”

My mind is utterly blank, and the question just came out even though I didn’t need to answer that. Maybe the change was so drastic that I had to confirm it.

Seeing me waver, Shouko asks in a somewhat shyly manner,

“…How is it…do, I look like a bride…?”

Maybe it’s because this girl looks like a stranger, or maybe it’s the atmosphere, or maybe it’s some other reason,; I just answered without thinking,

“—Um, no problems. At least no matter what, you don’t look like a bridegroom.”

The fleeting thought of ‘it’ll be depressing if Shouko’s wearing a wedding gown that doesn’t suit her’ got thrown far away. ‘You don’t look like a bridegroom’—I guess it’s a good job that I managed to at least say something.

“…Yuuji…”

Shouko called my name softly as she hugs the bouquet of flowers into her arms.

And then, she seems to be stunned as she remains rooted to the spot.

“Oi, oi, Shouko…?”

What’s wrong? She seems weird, was my answer weird?

Should I get over to her? I hesitate for a while. Just when I’m doing so, Shouko again says,

“…I’m so happy…”

The girl in front of me lowers her head and buries her face into the flowers.

She can no longer say anything more as she can only tremble silently.

“What, what’s going on? The bride seems to be crying?”

As if remembering his own job, the audio broadcast can be heard again.

Is she about to cry? I only noticed it when the host said it. Lowering her head, her shoulders trembling—Shouko’s crying silently in front of me.

“Oi, Shouko, what’s…”

The veil and the bouquet of flowers prevents me from seeing her face clearly. Why is she crying?

The originally silent audience starts to chatter loudly for some reason, and yet Shouko’s able to say to me in an audible voice,

“…Because…this has always been my dream…”

A hoarse voice reaches my ears.

“A dream, huh?”

“…Ever since I was little, I always dreamed of being Yuuji’s bride…always had this dream …of having a wedding that belongs only to Yuuji and me…but, I can’t possibly do it on my own, this dream of mine…”

The normally silent Shouko tries her best to say out some words, creating a weird feeling within me.

Because ‘that incident’ when we were young caused her to harbor affections only for me. The affections were merely supposed to be out of guilt and responsibility—but why must this person here remain so steadfast in her beliefs.

“…So…I’m really happy…to be able to do this, not with anybody else, but with Yuuji…”

Saying all the way till her, Shouko can no longer talk further as she weeps silently.

At this moment, the sound of someone blowing the nose can be heard. Is the audience touched to tears? Some people’s tear glands are really weak.

“So she’s actually crying out of happiness! Our bride here is still as focused as ever. How will the groom react to the bride’s confession?”

How should I respond? Do I need to say it? No matter the time or place, what I should do is to correct this person’s incorrect thinking.

Thinking about this—unbelievably, I can’t even utter a single word.

“Shouko, I—”

“Ah~ ah~ so boring~”

Just as I was about to finally say something, a loud voice can be heard from the audience. I immediately shut my mouth. Even though I don’t know what’s going on, maybe I got all dizzy or something. Maybe I can say that it was god’s grace to prevent me from saying something.

“Such a boring event~ forget about those boring things, can’t we have a performance or something~?”

“That’s right~ we have no interest in listening to your love story.”

Seems like the people who saved me were those two idiots. Their voices can be heard amongst the now silent crowd.

“Speaking of which, what 'being a bride was what I always wanted? Or what? Are you acting pure? Is this what the workers here to you to say? How idiotic is that? It's so disgusting it makes me sick!”

“Are you playing a pure love game? We don't want to waster our precious time on you people~ does that woman have a problem? I find it comical no matter how I hear it~”

“I know! That was a comedy just now right? That's right, where will there be anyone in this world with such a disgusting dream!?”

“Eh~ was that a comedy? It's really comical~”

Those two continue to mock Shouko one after another, but—

“WHAT DID YOU SAY!? SAY THAT AGAIN IF YOU DARE!!”

“AH, AKIHISA-KUN, PLEASE CALM DOWN! YOU'LL RUIN THIS EVENT IF YOU GET SO WORKED UP!”

The angry roar could be heard through the broadcast, and the sounds of violence can be heard from behind the stage. Seems like a certain idiot can't control his anger after hearing those words.

Where is he throwing his tantrum from? I turn my eyes from the couple below the stage to look behind.

But even though I took only a short glance—

“Wh-where's the bride? Where did the bride go?”

Shouko disappeared from the stage. What's left at the place where she was standing are a small bouquet of flowers and a wedding veil.

“..Sigh, really can't stand her.”

I picked up the veil that she threw onto the floor.

The veil that was supposedly as light as a feather now seems a lot heavier after being stained by Shouko's tears.

“Kirishima-san? Kirishima Shouko-san? Dear guests, please help us find the bride!”

The workers are now as anxious as ants on hot water.

Hm, seems like they have to end this wedding experience event. Now that the event they put so much effort in can only end as failure, those thick-skinned people at Kisaragi Highlands are definitely going pale.

“Mr, Mr Sakamoto! Please help us find the bride!”

One of the workers in the hall pants as he runs towards me, probably trying to ask me where that person ran off to.

“Sorry, I'll pass. It's troublesome, and I really want to go to the toilet.”

“Eh? Wa-wait a minute Mr Sakamoto!”

I turn around and leave while still hearing the cries of that worker, and he can only give up reluctantly after seeing me being unwilling to help. Really, if you have the time to ask me, how about you just search for yourself? That'll be faster right?

I get into the prepared crowd as I leave the hall. 5 minutes later, I found my target. Good thing they haven't gone too far off.

“Oh my, that was sooo funny~”

“Yeah, I always...dreamed of marrying you—how was it? Does it look like it? Is it cute?”

“Ahh, that was so like it. But—of course it's disgusting! Who will find it cute!?”

“Ya~”

Finally found them. Let's just settle this once and for all.

I slowly walk towards those two and said as I arrive behind them.

“Oi, you two.”

“Ahhh, what is it!?”

The coffee-colored faces of the two jerks turn to face me.

Those two are the ones who helped me and prevented me from falling into a human life grave. I really have to thank them.

“Ryouta, isn't this guy the one who acted as the groom?”

“Seems like it. WHAT DO YOU FAUX-GROOM WANT US FOR, SAY IT!”

The guy walked forward as he threatens me.

“Oh well, nothing much actually—”

I take off my western coat that I borrowed and loosen my tie. Unbelievable, my body's already so hot even without me doing any warm-ups

“—Let's just have a few words.”

<center>☆</center>

“Yo, you kept me waiting for quite a while.”

“...Yuuji.”

Standing in front of a hotel in Kisaragi Highlands, Shouko finally exits the passageway as she keeps her head down.

“Okay, time to go back.”

I help Shouko carry the large bag that she took back from the fake foreigner as we walk slowly towards the train station.

“...”

Shouko doesn't say anything at all as she silently follows me.

We silently walk down the path to the train station in this sunset.

I don't know how long we walked, but while we're walking that's pretty empty, Shouko finally asks softly,

“...Yuuji.”

“...What is it?”

“...Is my dream..weird?”

She must be bothered by the idiotic couple's mockery.

Shouko stopped, and though her head's lowered to prevent me from seeing her face, I can tell what her expression is.

“This, well, maybe it isn't ordinary.”

I chose my words carefully before making this reply.

“...”

Shouko again remains silent.

The reason why I answered like this is because in these not-so-short 7 years., she always harbored this one unshakeable dream as she stuck onto me. But now that her dream got mocked and denied in front of so many people, I can't even imagine how she feels.

But even so, I don't intend to lie just to comfort her.

“I'll use this chance to state this clearly, your feelings towards me are just derived from that past guilt you had.”

The event that happened 7 years ago was the key reason why Shouko thinks that she fell for me. Up till now, I'm still regretful of that incident. If I had handled it a little better, maybe it wouldn't have ended up like this.

Because of that, that person wasted her time on this useless bum here.

Thus, I have a need to tell her directly 'you're mistaken'—in order to prevent her from wasting time on such a thing.

“...Yuuji...”

Shouko gasped. Maybe this is a blow to her when I said this.

“But—”

But I have no need to hurt her. What's wrong is how this person here understands her feelings, but being able to harbo such feelings for just one person for this long is something she should be proud of.

So I have to tell her this. She isn't completely wrong, she just made a mistake in her target. However, her dream isn't wrong, and it's not strange at all.

“—But then, I won't laugh at your dream. Your dream is amazing, it won't lose to anyone, so you have to be confident of yourself.”

I put the thing that I picked up at the hall on Shouko, who has her head down.”

“However, you cannot mistake who you're going for.”

To have a wedding experience, it shouldn't be bad to have a memory like this, right?

“...This is...the headdress from...just now...”

Shouko reaches her hands out and receives the pure white headdress of the wedding gown as she lifts head head and stares at me in shock.

Seeing her so shocked, I suddenly feel somewhat awkward as I turn my head away.

Ah, now that I mentioned it, I have something else I have to tell her no matter what.

“Also, Shouko—”

I stare at the fading sunset and say softly—

“—The bento was delicious.”

I put the already lighter bag onto Shouko's hands.

“...Ah...my bento. Yuuji, you...notice...?”

“Okay, let's hurry up and head back. We'll be misunderstood if we stay out for far too long.”

“...Yuuji.”

“Especially my mom, no matter how I explain it—”

“Yuuji!”

It's been a while since I heard her speak so loudly, and I inadvertenly stop.

“What is it?”

I replied her call with my usual calm attitude.

Just as I tilt my head to face her, in the orange sunset, I see someone raising the headdress—”

“I didn't make a mistake after all!”

I see—my childhood friend smiling brightly at me.

<center>☆</center>

“Yo, Akihisa.”

Hm? Morning Yuuji, what's up?”

“You did quite a number to me at Kisaragi Highlands, huh?”

“Hahaha, what are you talking about? I was playing computer games at home the entire day, how can I possibly go to Kisaragi Highlands?”

“...Really? Well, you can act dumb all you want.”

“Wh, what are you saying? That's so weird~”

“Oh yeah, I got a present for you.”

“Eh? What is it?”

“This is a two-persons ticket to a highly-rated love story movie that's being aired right now. IF YOU HAVE 'SOMEONE YOU LIKE', JUST BRING HER OUT.”

I deliberately increase my volume for everyone in the classroom to hear.

“A two-persons ticket? Uu—even if you give me this, I don't really know who to ask.”

“So be it then.”

I stuff the ticket into Akihisa's hand and turns to walk away.

“Ah, Aki! I want to watch a movie this weekend~”

“Ah, Akihisa-kun! I just so happened to have a movie that I want to watch!”

“Eh? What's going on? Why do you two have such killing intent? I just want to pawn this ticket away for my daily funds—OWWWWW! THEY'RE ABOUT TO BE PULLED OUT! SEVERAL IMPORTANT PARTS OF MY BODY ARE GOING TO BE PULLED OUT BY YOU!!!”

The expected cries of anguish and pain can be heard from behind.

Really...who asked you to pull such a twisted plan in the first place, you big idiot.

<noinclude>
{| border="1" cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 1em 1em 0; background: #f9f9f9; border: 1px #aaaaaa solid; padding: 0.2em; border-collapse: collapse;"
|-
| Back to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_The Sakamoto Couple's Secret Love Technique Lecture|The Sakamoto Couple's Secret Love Technique Lecture]]
| Return to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Tsuchiya and Kudou's Mini Sex Life Story|Tsuchiya and Kudou's Mini Sex Life Story]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3.5 Me and Shouko and Kisaragi Highlands

2011-05-11T19:32:25Z

Caolsei:

==Me and Shouko and Kisaragi Highlands==

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 093.jpg|thumb|Me and Shouko and Kisaragi Highlands]]

“Akihisa.”

“Hm? Yuuji, what's up?

“I just thought of it, what will you do with those tickets?”

“Those tickets—are you talking about the free Kisaragi Highlands tickets?”

“Yeah, I remember that they have some trial run before they fully begin operations. Why don't you get Himeji to come along?”

“Wha, what are you saying, Yuuji!? If we use those tickets, the Kisaragi corporaion will use all their power of force those people who went to marry each other! Wouldn't Himeji-san be pitiful if it ends up like this?”

“That's sort of true. They did try their best to come up with that ill omen of 'any couple who goes there will gain happiness'. They probably put in lots of effort to make that a reality.”

“Mmm, that's the case.”

“However, I don't think Himeji will refuse.”

“...Eh?”

“Well, if you summon your courage and try to ask her out, I don't think she will really refuse.”

“Ah, ahhahaha, here we go again. Yuuji, you really love to make fun of me~ how can I possibly get married to Himeji-san? That's totally impossible.”

“Uuu~ since you said so, I'll leave it as that. Then, if you're not going, how are you going to use those tickers?”

“I just so happened to have someone who's about to get married, so I'll just send the tickets to that person.”

“Oh yeah, if someone wants to get married, the tickets will work extremely well. And if they can get married successfully, Kisaragi Corporation will be extremly happy.”

“Yeah, if it's successful, everyone will be happy.”

“Are those two who're getting married getting along well?”

“Nn, they just need an opportunity.”

“I see, it'll be great if they can get together.”

“Don't worry. They'll always be together.”

<center>☆</center>

On a certain holiday morning, the sunlight that seeps through the gaps of the blinds and the chirping of the sparrows woke me from my dream.

When I woke up—

“...Good morning, Yuuji.”

—I found Shouko standing beside my bed.

“...The weather today is good.”

Shouko pulls the blinds, causing the sunlight to shine brightly into my room.

“Hm? Ahh, seems good.”

The overly bright light causes me to narrow my eyes as I closely inspects the figure of my childhood friend.

As today's a holiday, she's not wearing the uniform. The top is a white long-sleeved knitted coat with a thin pink shirt underneath, and matching them at the bottom is a light knee length skirt. There's a piece of cloth meant to hide the interior it should be called an underskirt, right? Shouko would normally wear a T-shirt and jeans or shorts, so seems like she deliberately dolled herself up today.

I'm totally shocked that I actually checked through Shouko's attire, since it's not in my nature. Maybe I haven't woken up, right?

I shake my head hard to get rid of the sleepy sensation, and then turn to look at Shouko.

“I haven't greeted you yet. Morning, Shouko.”

“...Nn, morning.”

I pull my blanket aside and get off the bed.

Speaking of which, why did Shouko come to my room? Do I have a date with her or something?

I start to rack my just-woken-up brain—no good, I can't remember anything.

Since I can't think of anything, it means I don't have a date with her, right? I see.

“Sorry, Shouko, pass me my handphone.”

“...Are you going to make a call?”

“Mm, yeah.”

After receiving the phone that Shouko passed over, I press a few buttons.

If this person is in my room, this means—

“Ah, hello? Is this the police station?”

SHE'S AN INTRUDER!

<center>☆</center>

THOMP THOMP THOMP THOMP THOMP!! CRRRAAAAKKKK!!!

“MOM! TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON HERE!!”

“Oh my, Yuuji, good morning.”

After rushing into the kitchen, I saw my mom standing at the basin as she washes the dishes, even saying good morning to me energetically.

“WHAT MORNING!? WHY WAS SHOUKO IN MY ROOM!? I ENDED UP BEING TREATED BY THE POLICE AS SOME DELUDED MANIAC THAT CAN'T TELL WHAT'S 2-D AND 3-D!!!”

My childhood friend came into my room and called me up—when I said that, the reaction left a pain that won't ever be erased. What I can say is that even if I overslept, this is the greatest mistake I ever made in my entire life!

“...Eh?”

Hearing my complaints, those wide eyes of my mom blink quite a few times. She's almost 40, and yet this look is just like a kid. Maybe it's because of this natural doll-like face that my mom looks a lot younger than what she really is. 'People often mistook me for a college student'—that's was she herself said. However, my dad and I don't even believe this one bit. No matter what, she can't possibly be seen as a college student.

“You were talking about Shouko?”

Mom placed her hand on her face as she said that to me with a bothered look on her face.

Seeing her attitude...did Shouko sneak into my room? Mom didn't help out? If this were the case, I may have failed to think things through when I roared at her.”

“Ahh, nothing much, sorry for shouting at you early in the morning. I thought that mom helped her enter my room—”

“Really, Shouko's too naïve. I helped her create this opportunity, yet she didn't do anything, that's really a pi—oh my, Yuuji, why are you grabbing onto your mom's face?”

“SO YOU'RE THE ONE WHO DID THAT!!!”

Seems like I have to educate her on the common sense a mother should have.

“...Yuuji, you can't bully mom.”

“Shouko, don't say it. As a son, I have to re-educate this mother.”

Appearing later, Shouko tugged my arm as she tried to stop me. Speaking of which, it's rather weird when Shouko just said 'mom' with a different tone. However, I guess I shouldn't retort back at her for my own safety.

“...if you don't listen, I'm going to read this book with mom.”

Shouko pulled out an A4-sized book. Hm? That book...don't tell me—

“Hold, hold on a minute! That shouldn't be what girls should be reading! Hurry up and return it to me!”

Why on earth is it that book! That's the treasure trove that even Muttsulini would even cry over! She actually found it! This is bad! Speaking of which, how did she find it? I hid it in a place that even my mom couldn't find it even though she's living in the same house as me!”

“Oh my, Shouko, is that the secret book with the world history reference cover over it? Yuuji hid it in the double-layer 3rd drawer.”

I have never been so envious of Akihisa's live-alone lifestyle like now.

“I, I got it. I'll let go of mom now.”

I obediently let go of the death grip.

To actually force me to surrender with this trick. This is too despicable!

“...That's good. If so—”

Damn it! Once I get back my book, I'll hide it in a place where you two can't find it. I'll might as well lock it up in maximum security—

“...I'll only forgive you if you burn it.”

“Sorry Shouko, but no matter what, that isn't what one will do after forgiving, right?”

Normally, if I'm forgiven, I should have my book back.

“...Then I won't forgive you even if you burn this book.”

“Isn't there an option of not burning this?”

Though I knew her since elementary school, I will occasionally be unable to tell what the heck is going on with that person's mind.

“Hoho, you two still have quite the good relationship.”

having been released from the grip, my mom doesn't look panickt at all. She washes the last dish and wipes her hands off her apron. Such a carefree mother.

“I don't think we have quite the good relationship here...”

“Oh my, is that so?”

My mom still shows a smiley face. This mother will most likely say 'oh my, isn't that interesting' when she sees me knocked down by a car, right?

“Really, you two...speaking of which, what are you doing here, Shouko?”

“...Date.”

“Date? Do I have a date with you?”

“...Mm.”

Like usual Shouko nods her head as she pulls out a small piece of paper.

That seems to be some sort of ticket. Let me see, that is...

“Oh my, isn't that the Kisaragi Highlands trial ticket? And it says that it's a free experience. It should be a special ticket right? You're amazing Shouko, to be able to get such a ticket~”

“...A kind soul gave it to me.”

“Is that so? That's great~ Yuuji, who're you calling?”

“I got something to say to some scum.”

I first shut off the incoming display number of the handphone, and then dial Akihisa's number.

After a few seconds of dialling, that damned despicable foe picks up his phone with a casual tone.

“Hello hello? Who're you looking for?”

'''''“...............................I'M GOING TO KILL YOU.”'''''

“Eh? What! Who are you? That's really scar—(cuts off)”

Hearing the extremely awkward voice from the phone, I silently cut the phone line. At least I feel better now.

“...Let's go, Yuuji.”

Shouko grabbed my hand. Seems like she really wants to go.

“I don't want to even if I die.”

However, I definitely can't fulfil this wish of yours.

If it were just an ordinary tripe to a theme park, I might consider it a bit. However, that's an activity that Kisaragi Corporation planned, there's definitely something dangerous about it.

If I'm to go along with Shouko and drop into their trap, I'll definitely be forced to to get married with her. No matter what, I have to prevent this sort of thing from happening!

“Oh my, why are you so unwilling, Yuuji? Just go out and play with Shouko.”

My mom, who doesn't know anything at all, said it as if it were so easy.

“Obviously, I don't want to go because of many reasons.”

Only a few people, including Akihisa and me know of the Kisaragi Corporation's plan, and even Shouko, who's from the same school doesn't know anything about it. If she's to know of something like 'mobilizing the entire power of Kisaragi Corporation to force two people to marry', no matter what kind of dirty tactics she'll use, Shouko will definitely force me to join in, because she's that kind of a woman.

“...I want to go with Yuuji.”

It's been about 7 years since this person started to show her affections for me. No matter what I say, she wouldn't budge. In a certain sense, I really have to respect that unwavering will of hers.

That's the case, but I have to refuse, or else I'll really be forced to get married. No matter what, I don't want to marry in High school; I want to enjoy a few more years of my free life.

Okay, since this can't be helped, I'll have to say clearly 'Shouko, you better give up. Thus, I take a deep breath, and then say—

“Shouko.”

“I don't want.”

“You better give—”

Too fast! Way too fast! I only said her name!

“Shou, Shouko! Listen to me first...”

“...If you don't want to go no matter what—”

Overpowering my incomplete words, Shouko pulls out a small booklet from her bag.

“...Choose one.”

What Shouko pulled out was a marriage location recommendation book.

“Sorry, I have no idea how we ended up like this.”

“...You swore to me before that we'll get married if you break our promise.”

Why do I feel that the content of the promise was changed?

“Mommy feels that it's good to go overseas and get married, like Hawaii or some other foreign country~”

“Mom, why aren't you caring about what your own son thinks!?”

“...Yuuji, choose one. I'm going to book the venue.”

“Ah, Eruope seems rather good. Yuuji, which one do you think is good?”

“Uuu...”

No matter what I choose, it doesn't seem like I can avoid the issue of marriage. This scenario's way too precarious. But I'm not going to crumble due to this level of difficulty. Got to find a way to get away from it!

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“...I'm really too useless...”

After spending more than 2 hours on the train an don the bus, Shouko and I finally arrived in front of Kisaragi Highlands.

This, this couldn't be helped! If it's just Shouko, fine, but even my mum even agreed to us getting married enthusiastically! I had to get away from that delicate yet hard to define atmosphere! Who can blame me right now!

“...We're finally here.”

Shouko isn't even hiding her delight as she stares at the theme park in front of her.

Okay...seeing her so happy like this, guess it's worth bringing her here. Mm hum.

“Okay, Shouko, since we're already here—”

“...Mn.”

“Let's hurry up and go back.”

CRACK.

“...No, I must go in.”

“Hahaha, Shouko, my arm won't go in that direction.”

My arm got clamped down forcefully as I told Shouko while giving off cold sweat.

Damn it, my fingers are getting numb.

“...This is what couples will do.”

“Hold on Shouko! Are you thinking that this intimate act of holding hands isn't any different from surrendering?”

“?”

Seeing her head full of question marks, this woman's way too terrifying. She probably thinks that all the couples in the world will lock their arms together in order to keep this lovers around

“...Anyway, let's go in.”

“GUH! At least release my hand before going! My arm will really get twisted if this keeps up!”

As my left arm got taken as a hostage, I got dragged by Shouko to the entrance. Since today's a trial operation day before the real opening, we didn't wait long before arriving in front of the attendants.

“Welcome to Kisaragi Highlands!”

This youngster doesn't look like a Japanese, since he's smiling at us while saying that in a weird tone. He looks like an Asian alright, but I don't know if he's a Japanese.

“Today's our trail day. Do you two have an entrance ticket?”

“...Yea.”

Shouko produced that ticket from her pocket.

“Sorry, please excuse me.”

The attendant looked back at us after seeing that coupon, and the smile that was on his face is instantly frozen.

“...Can't this ticket be used?”

Seeing the attendant's expression change, Shouko starts to look rather worried.

“Nonono, this ticket can be used. However, please hold on~”

The attendant immediately whips out a handphone from his pocket as he starts to make a call to someone.

“—It's me. Those two are here. Prepare the wedding now, I'll think of a way to stop them.”

“Oi, hold on! What's with those inappropriate words!”

The youngster's expression immediately became rather scary. Is he a worker of that damned corporation that started all these?

“...Prepare the wedding?”

Shouko tilts her head in bewilderment. Since she doesn't know of what Kisaragi Corporation is planning, she must be feeling puzzled after hearing that 'Prepare Wedding'.

“Please don't mind, this is just a logistics problem.”

The attendant reverts back to his original smile in order to hide the situation, but no matter how I look that it, it's just too strange.

“Oi, wasn't your Japanese really fluent when you were talking on the phone?”

“O~ uu, Japanese is really tough, I don't know what you're saying~”

This guy really bugs me.

“Speaking of which, there's no need to prepare whatsoever wedding. Just let us go in and don't bother us.”

Thanks to the phone call just now, I know what they're planning. However, I'm not planning on letting them do whatever they want. If not, my entire life will be...

“Don't say that, please like us handle this and prepare a super duper wedding for you~”

“No need.”

“You must allow us no matter what.”

“No.”

“Please?”

“I refuse?”

“If you refuse, I'm going to send some rotten crayfish to your house!”

“NO! Our family will get food poisoning if that happens!”

My mum will definitely think that those are Ise shrimps. To actually make such a terrifying threat, this damned fake foreigner!

“Then, let's have a commemorative photo.”

“...Commemorative photo?”

“Yes, this will be a super matching imprint of a couple's love~”

“...Yuuji and I...match each other (blushes).”

Shouko started to blush because of this fake foreigner's nonsense.

“Sorry to keep you waiting. I have the camera here.”

At this moment, another worker's holding onto a camera with one hand as his cap is lowered.

Hm? I seem to have met this guy before. Isn't it too suspicious that he lowered his cap deliberately?

“You specially brought the camera here. Sorry to bother you, you've been a great help.”

The fake foreigner thanked as he received the camera. That's really suspicious! They aren't convenience store workers, is there a need to be so polite to each other in a theme park?

—Hm, let me try this.

“Sorry, I'm going to make a call.”

“Okay, please.”

I pulled out my phone and call this huge idiot named 'Yoshii Akihisa' while not showing my number.

Prrrr Prrrr.

“Ah, sorry, my phone rang.”

Once the phone rang, the butt pocket of the guy who brought the camera over rang.

Success!

''“Yo~ Akihisa, you sure found it interesting, right?”''

“You got the wrong person!”

Dash!

“Ah, damn it! You dare to run away? Let go of me, you fake foreigner!”

“He's one of our workers here, the name's Elizabeth Hanako (35 years old), also known as Steve. He's definitely not called Yoshii or something,”

“Shut up! You actually came up with such a ridiculous name and age without flinching! And no matter what, that sort of name can't possibly be called Steve! Speaking of which, I never called that guy by his surname Yoshii, right?”

Akihisa got away while I was held up by the fake foreigner.

That damned Itsuki's definitely trying to set me up...what is he treating my life as! Is he thinking about payback?

But isn't it too much to actually act as a worker here? This doesn't seem like Akihisa's working alone.

That old granny---let me repeat that again, the principal helped out as well, right? Since that damned old granny's indebted to him, she probably won't refuse.

No, not just the old granny, even the rest should be involved.

“Sorry Shouko, but just endure this for a while.”

“?”

I reach my hand out to grab the stunned Shouko's skirt and lift it up slight—to the length where her underwear can be seen.

“...(Flash)!”

At that moment, from the corner of my eyes, I caught a figure reach his arms and clutch in front of his chest

—Anyway, it's just a guy who's wearing a fox costume.

“To reach his arms quickly in and clutch in front of his chest for a digital camera...even Muttsulini's heee?”

After exchanging glances with me, that fox mascot immediately disappeared agilely like a rabbit.

Since Akihisa and Muttsulini are around, then Hideyoshi and and Himeji should be around somewhere. Really, these guys...why are they so tireless when it comes to other people's misfortune!

“...Yuuji, ecchi.”

Just as I'm wondering how to punish them, I noticed that Shouko's staring at me rather angrily.

“What? You, you're mistaken! I'm not interested in you underwear at all!”

“...I'll be bothered if that's the case.”

“GUUAAHHH!! THAT'S COMPLETELY UNREASONABLE!!!”

Shouko stretched her arm and grabbed my skull.I seem to hear my own bone cracking.

“Okay, it's now time to take the photo. Say cheese.”

The light start to flash nearby, and then an electronic sound can be heard.

“We'll print it immediately, so please wait for us here.”

“...I know, I'll be waiting for you in this position.”

“GUUAHH!! IF YOU MAINTAIN THIS POSITION, MY SKULL WILL...”

Born with an ever honest personality, Shouko didn't even let go as she continues to wait in this position.

Does she really like me?

“It's done. Please take this.”

After a short while, the fake foreigner came back with the photo, and I got released.

“...Thank you.”

Shouko received the photo over happily.

“...Look, Yuuji, this is our memory.”

Shouko said this as she brought the photo right in front of me, who's coughing now.

“What's with this photo!”

The image taken was actually the back of Shouko's head and me being executed painfully. Also—

“I added a special touch for you, you know.”

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 113.jpg|thumb]]

The special touch was adding a heart-shaped frame around our photo and adding the words, "We're about to get married".

Surrounding the woman who let out the claw of Heaven and the guy who was suffering because of it. To the unsuspecting folks, they should be wondering what happened between those two that cause them to end up in marriage...but no matter how I look at it, there can never be happiness between these two!

“Can I hang this up in our theme park photo room?”

“Are you still normal? What's the benefit of having such a photo as a decoration?”

Any customer who sees this will definitely retreat.

"...Are you embarrassed, Yuuji?”

“Sorry, but no matter how I look at this, this photo doesn't seem to warrant any need for me to be embarrassed."

Just as I was looking at this ridiculous photo and about to say this—

“Ahh! Someone's taking a photo! Let's get them to take a photo for us~”

“As a wedding commemoration photo of us? That's cool. Oi, you're a worker here, right? Help us take a photo!!”

The arrogant delinquent couple shouted as they head towards us.

“Sorry, but this couple is targeted by the corporation's plan...”

The fake foreigner refused. Seems like this photo is another scheme in the corporation's plan, and only we're entitled to it.

“What are you saying? Is there anything wrong with it? We're customers, you understand!?”

“Waa~ Ryouta's so cool~~”

The man glares angrily a the fake foreigner as he looks from below to top. Seems like this guy's really a delinquent. The woman's who's excited about this guy's roguishness probably has a screw loose or something.

“And our photo should be more attractive compared to those old-fashioned brats, right?

“That's right, compared to that dumb guy, my Ryouta's 100 times cooler than him!”

Never mind, I'll slip away while that delinquent couple's distracted.

“....(tatatatata).”

“Eh Oi, Shouko, where're you going?”

I grabbed Shouko's wrist just as she's angrily charing that the couple.

“...Those two just insulted Yuuji.”

“I say, you... If we're to bother about this, we won't be able to end this.”

We'll definitely not end up with something good if we're to clash with those guys. Besides, no matter what they say, I won't even care about it. Just seeing them is enough to irritate me.

“Let's go, Shouko.”

“...Since Yuuji said so...”

Seems like Shouko doesn't want to see them as well, as she followed after I told her.

“Ahhh! If you continue to drag on like this, I'll report to the media that your customer service is atrocious, you hear me!?”

“That's right~ we're customers!!”

The delinquent couple behind us continue to shout.

The promotional event actually got such customers here. Kisaragi Highland's really unlucky.

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“Okay then, let's go home after we walk around.”

“...We must walk around happily.”

Like what was advertised, the theme park has all sorts of the latest games, from the 3D-effects gaming equipment to the horrifying roller coast, coffee cups, carousels. There are even some attractions with things imagine even with the outer appearances.”

“It'll be easier if there's a cinema somewhere here.”

“...It's rare for us to come by, that won't do.”

My proposal got rejected by Shouko. Though it's troublesome, I'm trying to find an attraction that won't make both sides awkward. At this moment, a mascot came to us while looking like it's going to fall. She seems similar to that fox mascot just now, except in a different outfit. And this one has a large butterfly knot on it, so it should be a female, right?

“Onii-chan, Phi Phi will introduce you to some interesting attractions!”

A youthful girl's voice can be heard from below the mascot, and it seems like it doesn't have a voice changer, since it seems like a normal person...or rather, this is a familiar voice. Am I thinking too much? Why do I feel that this sounds like a certain honor student from our class.

Seems like I have to check it out.

“Speaking of which, the female college student who's working part-time is dating Akihisa to a movie.”

“Ehh, are you talking about Akihisa-kun? Where did you see that?”

These guys actually came here...

“Oi, Himeji! You're here to help?”

“Ah! You, you're mistaken! I—no, Phi Phi isn't called Himeji! As you can see, Phi Phi is a fox girl!”

To actually think of a way to force her way out of this, Himeji's a really serious person.

“Okay Phi Phi, then let's see you introduce the place.”

“Ah? Oh, mm! Phi Phi recommends the haunted house directly opposite.”

Himeji—no, Phi Phi stretched her hand out and points to a building on the other side of the fountain. Hm, so it's the famous haunted house that was built from an abandoned hospital?

“Really, thanks.”

“No problems. Enjoy yourself.”

“Oh, Shouko, let's go to 'some place other than the haunted house'.”

I push Shouko from behind. The moment I said this, Himeji immediately pulled my wrist.

“Wai wai wai wai wait! Why are you not going to the recommended place!”

“You dare to ask me why! I can tell from you tone that there's some trap inside to make fun of me right? I'm not going to go on a suicide run.”

No matter how good her grades is, Himeji really can't fool anyone. She immediately revealed their plan accidentally.

“I, I'll be really bothered! Please, please go there!”

“I refuse.”

I don't want to sell my life away for just her request! I must refuse no matter what, I got a good freedom of youth ahead of me!

“Please~ you'll definitely find the ghost house interesting!”

“I, DON'T, WANT!”

I ignore Himeji, who's tugging at me. However, she continues to tug at me as I drag her. That's really troublesome. Just as I intend to shrug her away, something seems to be heading for us.

“End of the line, Yuuji—no, the ugly guy over there!”

“These dumb movements...is it Akihisa?”

Appearing in a dumb manner is the male mascot I just found. What the heck, a change of costumes?

“How rude! I—no, wait, since when is Noi Noi dumb?”

“Shut up! What's wrong with calling out an idiot who's wearing the mascot head the other way around!”

What's supposed to be a cute and cuddly doll now has its head turned backwards because of Akihisa, and now it's a bone-chilling creature.

“...Yuuji, Noi Noi's just a kid.”

“Shouko, a creature that can put the head wrongly will be annihilated by society.”

You'll die if you don't watch yourself. An existence like him can only exist at the bottom of the food chain.

“Ah, Akihisa-kun, your head's turned backwards! Ahh! The kids were crying once they saw you!”

“Wah, this isn't good! No wonder I can't see what's in front!”

“Hurry up and put the head properly, or Sakamoto-kun will find out!”

To think that you can actually fool me till now, these two are really a match for each other.

“Ah, sorry to keep you waiting.”

An even more troublesome person is here—the fake foreigner from just now. To think that he actually caught up to us so quickly.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please head to the haunted house.”

“Didn't I say that I don't want to!?”

I don't want to deliberately enter that dangerous place.

“If you refuse, I'll send a large amount of food to your house.”

“Don't do that! If you do, my family's lives will be at risk!”

My mum won't even bother about what to do unless we finish up all the food. How can this guy be so vicious?

“Speaking of which, Akihisa-kun, who's the female university student who was with you? To think that you have the time to chase after other girls even during this important situation...”

“Eh? What are you talking about? I never—hm? Why are you taking you phone out? Who're you calling here?”

“I think Minami will be here soon. Before that, please explain clearly.”

“No, no way! If there's a bloodshed incident on opening day, the ratings of this theme park will—GYYAH! I feel that someone's rushing at me angrily! I'll do anything, kneel, beg for forgiveness, just don't kill me!!”

The two fantasy creatures are having a couple's quarrel. What an unbelievable scene.

“Miss Sakamoto Shouko, you may hug your boyfriend when you enter the haunted house in any way that you want.”

“...Yuuji, I want to go.”

“You're really despicable. Actually thinking of using Shouko to force me into the trap! And who asked you to randomly change Shouko's surname! Her surname's Kirishima!”

“...Don't worry, it'll become Sakamoto soon.”

Without noticing it, Shouko again controls my arm. If so, I can't resist!

“Okay, then please sign here.”

The fake foreigner pulls out a document and a pen. What's this?

“Just an ordinary consent form.”

We're just entering a haunted house. Is there really a need to sign a consent form? Is it really that dangerous inside?

“Seems interesting.”

Since there's a consent form, it should mean that there's something that's really scary inside. Maybe it's really interesting.

I'm starting to feel a little interested as I get ready to sign that consent form with the ball-point pen.

'Consent form'

1. I—Sakamoto Yuuji swear to take Kirishima Shouko as my wife, through thick and thin, loving each other for the rest of our lives.
2. I swear that we will get married at Kisaragi Highlands.
3. No matter what happens, I will never leave Kirishima Shouko.

“...Here, Yuuji, here's the seal.”

“The inkpad's here.”

“Am I the only one? Am I the only one who finds this completely ridiculous!?”

These guys are crazy!

“That's a joke. There's no need to sign this, you can just go in.”

“...mn, just joking.”

“You guys prepared the carbon papers, and you actually dare say that you're joking!”

I really have a lot of things to say, but isn't their common sense too cruel or something?

“It'll be rather inconvenient to bring that huge bag around. I'll keep it for you.”

“...Sorry to bother you.”

Shouko hands her bag over to the fake foreigner. Speaking of which, her bag's really huge.

“...The contents inside may spillover, so please don't put it horizontally.”

“You're talking about this bag? I understand, please don't worry.”

Spill out? What's inside that bag?

“Then enjoy to you hearts' content.”

“...Let's go, Yuuji.”

“OWOWOWOWOW! MY ARM'S GOING TO GET TWISTED BY YOU!”

My resistance ends up useless, and after a while, I got dragged by her to the entrance of the haunted house. Did they deliberately try to create the atmosphere? The haunted house has automatic sliding doors, but there's not a single light inside. It feels like someone's making some moves.

“It's me. The prey has already entered the haunted house. We'll start with the plan that Mr Yoshii came up with.”

Before the auto-door closed, I could hear the fake foreigner say that.

So Akihisa came up with the plan? I don't know what's going on, but I won't let that guy get what he wants!

Shouko and I continue to walk down this dark corridor. Kk, kk...the the footsteps on the linoleum's a lot clearer than what I expected.

“As expected of a haunted house that's modified from an abandoned hospital, this sure is rare.”

“...It's a bit scary.”

“It's really rare for you to be afraid even though there's nothing.”

“...Maybe.”

We continue to move on in the directions mapped out by the sign 'move forward'.

There's nothing on the 1st level, and so we head upstairs. Before we can take a few steps, there finally seems to be something going on.

“—fer—ji—”

With a heart chilling wind, a distorted voice can be heard.

Hm? Is this a cry of agony?

“...Is this voice...Yuuji?”

“Hm? Is that so?”

The voice does sound similar to mine. Most likely, Hideyoshi's imitating my voice.

To hear my own voice without me even speaking, it does feel scary. I thought that Akihisa's plan will be rather simple or something—

“I prefer Himeji to Shouko, and her breasts are bigger.”

“...Yuuji, are you ready?”

“Scary! Shouko's face actually became like a Hannya! That's super thrilling!”

How did that damned Akihisa think of such a terrifying method! Is he planning not not letting me escape here alive!?

Just as I'm getting worried, I suddenly hear some sort of mechanism being activated.

Great! Well done! I can protect my own life now.

“Ah, Shouko! Something seemed to have appeared!”

Turning to where the sound came from, something appeared at the originally empty place . That is—

“...How kind of them.”

—A mace?

That damned Akihisa! He actually prepared everything! Though they messed up on how it's supposed to be scary, this is one super duper scary haunted house!”

“...Yuuji, where are you going to escape to?”

Wielding the mace, my childhood friend came pursuing after me in this new method of playing, and I got chased for an entire hour.

However, does Akihisa really think that this will bring Shouko and me together?

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I continued to escape as I tried to explain to Shouko that Hideyoshi was mimicking my voice, and finally managed to calm her down and bring her out from the house.

“It's been tough on you! How about that? Do you two feel like getting married?”

“Only you and that idiot Akihisa will think this will make us get married...”

Forget about creating a gap between us, I'm feeling that the divide between me and Shouko just got wider.

“That's strange? I though those couples who pass through adversity together won't have such a problem with each other...”

“Well, ya, it would have been possible if the crisis didn't come from the ones who should be together...”

This fake foreigner's brain shouldn't be any different from Akihisa, right?

But now at least I can relax a bit. If it's a plan Akihisa came up with, there wouldn't be any delinquents coming up to threaten or extort me. If so, I don't have to keep thinking of ways to escape...how troublesome. If possible, I really want to go home now.

“...About time to eat lunch.”

Shouko stares above the fountain as she mutters. The large clock that's in that direction indicates that it's 1pm. That's right, it's about time to eat.

“...That, my bag--”

“Yes, we prepared a deluxe meal for both guests. Please follow me.”

The fake foreigner walks away after saying this.

They actually prepared lunch for us. That entrance ticket sure isn't for show.

“What's wrong, Shouko?”

“...Nothing.”

“?”
What's with that lonely look on her face out of a sudden?

“...Yuuji, if we don't hurry up, we won't be able to catch up with him.”
“Hm, you're right.”

Maybe believing that we will follow him, the fake foreigner has already walked quite some distance. Well, since he said that they prepared a meal for us, we'll let him treat us.

I hurriedly walk away, and after a walk, what appears in front of me is a trendy-looking restaurant.

“Please enjoy the meal that we'll be preparing for you here.”

Immediately, the fake foreigner ushered us into a wide hall that seems like a party hall.

There's a round table right in the middle, and there is also a stage and some small tables. The atmosphere now doesn't look like a restaurant, but like a—

“...A quiz show?”

That's right, though there's a lot of luxurious food on the table, this is basically a quiz show that we always see on TV.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, welcome.”

Am attendant walks over as he leads us to our seats—what the hack, I know this guy too!

“Why are you dressed up as an attendant, Hideyoshi?”

“Hideyoshi? What are you talking about?”

My classmate shows a poker face. Has this guy gotten into character? Seems like it's hard to rip this guy's mask off.

I'll just use the useful tool that I used on Akihisa!

“Since you deny it, I'll just confirm it.”

I pull out my phone and look for a name in the phonebook called 'Kinoshita Hideyoshi'. But before I could press the call button, the attendant beside me immediately took action.

“Ah, my phone slip!”

Hideyoshi (?) pulls out his phone and threw it hard at the fountain. Ploop, the sound of something landing in the water can be heard.

“Is, is there a need to go to such an extent? Your phone will definitely spoil!”

“I don't understand what you're saying.”

Hideyoshi continues to give me the poke face.

Even if he doesn't really use it, to throw the handphone away without a second thought....the enemy's thoroughly into character.

“Then, if you allow me, please.”

“Ah, ooh...”

We're led by the attendant to the center of the hall.

“As the two guests are underaged, we've prepared these drinks for you.”

After we sat down, the attendant pours some non-alcoholic champagne into our glasses, not even forgetting to introduce us the brand of this champagne. He's really into it, as expected of someone from the drama society.

“Please enjoy your appetiser.”

After putting down the glasses the dishes are served onto this table. Seeing the luxurious food that's only the appetiser, I can only grimace that I'm not used to holding a fork and a knife.

Speaking of which, Shouko should be rather used to this sort of cuisine, right?

Until we finished eating, there doesn't seem to be any traps around. Just as I thought that I can heave a sigh of relief—

“Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for attending this trial trip of Kisaragi Highlands's before it officially opens!”

A loud voice booms throughout the entire hall.
“Actually, in this hall today, there will be a wedding experience event to prepare a high school couple!”

Some of the drink I just gulped down accidentally sputtered out of the nose.

“We at Kisaragi Corporation wish to encourage this couple and created such a scheme! The scheme is called the 'Kisaragi Highlands wedding experience' quiz show~

a heavy sound of the entrance being locked can be heard from the entrance. To actually cut off my escape route, damn you Akihisa! Seems like you have grasped how I would think!

“The content of this scheme is simple. You just need to answer all the 5 provided questions to enjoy the wedding of the highest class! Of course, if you wish, there's no problems with directly registering as a couple.”

That's a huge problem, you big idiot.

“Then Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, please stand on the stage in front!”

As the host earnestly pointed in our direction, everyone in the restaurant turned around to look at us.

“...A wedding experience...I'll do my best!”

“Calm down Shouko. A wedding has to be agreed by both sides—OWWWWW!!! MY EARS ARE ABOUT TO BE RIPPED OFF! I'LL GO! I'LL GO! JUST LET ME GO!”

I continue to keep telling myself that this is just an experience, but I still feel unhappy as I step on on the stage.

With the workers leading us, Shouko and I are assigned to our seats.

“Okay, the 'Kisaragi Highlands wedding experience' quiz show begins now!”

There's a huge button between Shouko and me, and it seems like a standard answering system where we have to press the button before answering.

Well...if I get the answer correct, I'll get a prize, but if I answer a few questions wrongly, this event will be a bust, right? Seems like I'll just have to keep answering wrongly.

“And the first question is up!”

I reach my hand out for the button as I wait for the question.

Come on, show me what questions you have...

“When is Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko's wedding anniversary?”

That's too strange! I don't even understand what this question is about!?

—Ding dong!

Damn it! Before I even noticed, Shouko actually pressed the button. But even if it's Shouko, she can't possibly answer a question that has a non-existent answer—

“Alright, let's have Miss Shouko with the answer!”

“...Everyday's our wedding anniversary.”

“DON'T SAY IT SHOUKO! I'LL BANG MY HEAD AGAINST THE WALL OUT OF EMBARRASSMENT!!”

“Brillant! That's the correct answer!”

That's the correct answer!?

I glare at the host; he actually glanced at me from an angle where the audience can't see him. What the heck! So this was pre-planned! Do you really want us to have a wedding experience?

Find then, if so—I'll show you my passion!

“Second question! Where was the wedding held?”

—Ding dong!

I quickly pressed the button down as I lean near the mic to say the correct answer. These questions aren't questions now, they're just interrogations. But it doesn't matter. If I give a wrong answer, that's nothing!

“Okay, will Mr Sakamoto Yuuji please answer!”

“Miso-stewed Mackerel!”

“Correct answer!”

“What?”

How can such a thing happen! You asked for the location, so how can my miso-stewed mackerel answer be correct!?

“The wedding of these two will be held in front of the phoenix in front of our Kisaragi hotel, also known as the 'Miso-stwed Mackerel'.

“Hold on! You just came up with this nickname, right!? There has to be a limit to this!”

“Third question! Where did the couple first meet?”

No way, they aren't listening to me...but if so, I can guess what they're thinking. I have to say the wrong answer this time. Got to be faster than Shouko and say the wrong answer—

“...Don't you think of doing that.”

—Pwoosh.

“OOOOWWWWW!!! MY EYESS! MMMYYY EEEEEYYYYEEEEESSSS!!!”

—Ding dong.

“Okay, will Miss Shouko answer?”

“...Elementary school.”

“Correct answer.! These two first met each other in elementary school, and after a long time of dating, they're finally about to be married today! Just an intimate pair of childhood friends!”

Didn't he just see my eyes getting poked hard? Since when has our relationship reached such an extent that it can be considered intimate!?

It's too late to answer the question after hearing it, so I have to get the right to answer before Shouko does. If so—

“Next, the fourth question!”

—Ding dong!

Before the host could say the answer, I already pressed the button. Now I can give an answer before being stopped! Though I don't know the question, I'll be 100% correct if I just answer 'I don't know'.

“I don't—”

“Correct answer! Up next, the last question!”
WOAH! He just ignored my answer! Did he give this reply because I ignored the question? I can't even answer a question wrongly now. Just as I'm thinking about giving up—

“Oi~ is there something wrong? We're also about to get married, why is it that only that high school couple can have such special treatment~”

The savior with the irritating tone has arrived.

Just as everyone start to look around for that guy who spoke, he walked up to the stage without anyone askign him to.

“Dear guests, we're having an event not. Sorry, but can you—”

“AHH? STOP YAPPING OVER THERE! WE'RE GUESTS, YOU UNDERTAND THE SITUATION!?”

The coffee-haired guy with piercings threatened the workers.

I actually wanted to mention that those two look familiar. So they're actually the delinquent couple that continued to pester the fake foreigner when we first entered.

“We have a wedding experience as well~”

“Bu, but, this—”

“DIDN'T WE TELL YOU TO STOP YAPPING ABOUT? WE WANT TO ENTER THE QUIZ SHOW. ARE YOU DUMB OR DID YOU NOT HEAR US!?”

“YEAH! HOW ABOUT THAT! WE'LL COME UP WITH THE QUESTION. IF THEY ANSWER IT CORRECTLY, THEY WIN. IF WE ANSWER IT WRONGLY, WE WIN!”

“How, how can it be—”

Ignoring the panicking workers, the delinquent couple stride onto the stage and grab a mic.

Once in a million chance! That host will definitely ignore my answer, but if it's these duo, I may have a chance to escape.

Next, I just need to prevent Shouko from answer...

“...Yu, Yuuji?”

I held Shouko's hand as I put my hand on the contestant's table. If so, she can't poke her fingers into my eye. Now all I need to do is just to give them a wrong answer, and everything will be OK!

“Okay, here's the question.”

The hoodlum deliberately rolls his tongue and says in a tone that's hard to hear out.

Come on, what's the question?
Relax, no matter how simple the question is, I can answer it wrongly—

“WHAT'S THE CAPITAL OF EUROPE?”

“...”

I can't even answer this.

“Oi, hurry up and answer! Don't you know?”

I really don't know what's the answer. In my memory, Europe was never designated as a 'country'. It's impossible to answer this question at all.

“...Mr Sakamoto Yuuji and Miss Shouko, congratulations on winning the 'Kisaragi Highlands' wedding experience' prize!”

“OI, hold up! These two haven't answered at all! We should be the winners, right?”

“How is that possible? Is that host an idiot!?”

As the idiotic couple continue to create a ruckus, the stage ended.

To think that there's a bigger idiot than Akihisa in this world...this world sure is huge.

<center>☆</center>

“Congratulations to you two to be able to win this free wedding experience. You two are lucky.”

“...I'm so happy.”

Once we walked out the restaurant, the fake foreigner immediately carries Shouko's bag as he walks towards us. Really, what lucky? You guys planned this right from the beginning.

“Oh yeah, Shouko, what's in your bag? Why is it so big?”

“...No, it's nothing...”

Shouko's reply seems to be a little troubled. What's going on?

However, this person here is someone who'll bring my important stamp around, so it's not strange to see her bring such a large bag.”

“Miss Shouko, for the wedding experience, can you please follow this worker and get ready?”

A 30+ woman walks up to us from behind the fake foreigner and bows to us. She looks just like a professional who specializes in dressing up wedding gowns on others.

“Hello, we've met for the first time. I'll be in charge of putting the wedding gown on this Miss here. For this event to be an unforgettable success, please allow me to help you dress up as the prettiest bride.”

The female worker smiles earnestly at Shouko.

Oi oi oi, aren't you playing it too seriously? You even got a specialist to come all the way here?

If so, Kisaragi Highlands wasn't planning to promote their facilities right from the start, but the wedding experience we're going to have? Seems like my time is wasted on this mock wedding.

“If so, don't I have to wait for quite some time?”

“Please rest assured, as for Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, we've already heard from Mr Yoshii—no, that's not right, we've already thought of the best way to deal with you.”

“There's no need to hide it now. Did Akihisa give you any instructions?”

I suddenly have a bad feeling about this.

“Yes, he said to use this on Mr Sakamoto Yuuji first.”

While saying this, he pulls out something that looks like a taser (200,000 volts)

“Because Mr Sakamoto Yuuji may think of escaping, Mr Yoshii's instruction is to use this taser to knock you out and then change you into the bridegroom's outfit.”

“A, AAAAAKKKKKKIIIIHHHHIIIIIIISSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!”

“Please endure this for a while.”

Before I can hear the terrifying bzzt sound from behind, I got knocked out just like that.

<center>☆</center>

“And now, we'll have the main event of today, the wedding experience! Will all guests please applaud the bridegroom!”

The loud applause seems like it covers the entire theme park. I thought that these guests were air to come here, but even the ordinary guests can't help but applaud on hearing this.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please stand on the stage.”

The fake foreigner who's standing on the stage whispered to me.

How about I try to beat this guy down and immediately run away?

“If you still want to resist, I'll put sea urchins and brown brushes together as a sashimi plate and send it over to you house.”
Uu! If that's sent to my house, my mum will think that they're all sea urchins and eat the brown brushes together...

“Really can't stand you...oh well, at least that's just an experience. I'll just play along...”

In order to let the fake foreigner relax, I deliberately said these words of giving up struggling in a voice loud enough for him to hear.

These guys must be planning to go all the way from exchanging rings to the oath and the kiss. They probably want to use this entire sequence to spread it out to the public and force Shouko and me to get married. But if society's to see this and find me with another girl, I'll get talked about. Frustrating, but a skillful way of forcing us to get married. To come up with such a plan—though they haven't considered the problem of misusing the image rights, the enemy's a famous enterprise, so they will have a way.

If so, I'll just have to escape before the oath is said, and best if everyone can see it. Maybe I can feign illness...they can only end this if they can't handle me. As long as I get away from here, it doesn't matter what happens later.

“Mr Sakamoto Yuuji, please head up the stage.”

“Okay okay.”

Dong dong dong, I climb up the slightly steep steps. When I got onto the stage, the scene in front of me makes me somewhat dizzy.

“Oi, that can't be it...what's with this setup!?”

What appeared in front of me are numerous lights and a full audience like a concert. Everything, the dry ice equipment, the balls and smoke are all set up. And there're all sorts of lighting experts around.

“And now, a brief introduction of the bridegroom's life—”

Oh? Introducing my life? That's not too different from a real wedding. Seems like even with the final goal in mind, they got every minor detail in place as well. The quiz show just now was the same as well. Seems like they got lots of details from Akihisa—

“—we'll ignore that.”

'''That's too shoddy!'''

“Haiz! No need to introduce him in the first place.”

“We have no interest in that in the first place~”

“We just need to know that there are people who aren’t worthy of being at our wedding place.”

“That’s right~”

The jerks sitting in front create such a ruckus.

The voices…so it’s that delinquent couple in the quiz show just now.

They’re in the front row, yet they continue to yap away like nobody’s business. These two’s etiquette are as lousy as their looks.

“…In order to avoid creating disturbance to the other guests, will those below the stage, please avoid creating a huge commotion.”

“Were they just talking about us?”

“No way, we’re guests!”

“You’re right~”

“Humph, even if they’re talking about us, we have no need to be mindful about that. The main thing is that we’re not satisfied. Isn’t that right, isn’t that more important?”

“That’s right, that’s right! Well said, Ryouta!”

The self-centred couple continue to increase their volume without any restraint.

The organizers should be really wishing that they can get rid of these meddlesome people, but these jerks that are making such a ruckus are tougher for them to handle. Since this is a promotional event, there’ll be no point to this is there’s negative feedback, so they can only leave those two alone.

“And now, the bride will be here.”

The BGM god deliberately louder as it reaches my ears, and all the lights are switched off. A light smoke rises from the feet, and it can’t be denied that there’s a wedding atmosphere here.

—Haha, it’ll be depressing if Shouko’s wearing a wedding gown that doesn’t suit her!

I’ll run away later. Since it’s like this now, it’ll be interesting to see Shouko in a wedding gown.

After making this decision, I decide to stay here. Before my eyes got used to the darkness, the spotlight lights up.

“Please welcome our female lead in this event, Miss Kirishima Shouko!”

With the audio broadcast, several lights are lit up as they all gather at a part of the stage. The darkness got instantly replaced by the light, forcing people to close teur eyes.

When I try to open my eyes, I see the figure—and is rendered speechless.

Seems like I’ve just met the childhood friend that I’ve known since young in quite a while—seeing her like this, I start to feel a little delusional.

She looks just like a real bride, standing elegantly over there. Who…is she?

“…So pretty.”

A voice can be heard from the silent crowd that’s utterly awestruck. I don’t know who said that, but those words reached my ears without any deterrence.

Maybe it’s because it was delicately made that the pure white gown doesn’t have a single crumple. The length of the skirt seems to nearly reach the floor, as it didn’t get stained while she was walking.

“…Yuuji…”

The face hidden under the wedding gown, my childhood friend, dressed in a silk dress seems to look uncomfortable as she looks up. The bouquet of flowers in her hands at chest level sways about slightly.

“Are you, Shouko…?”

“…Nn.”

My mind is utterly blank, and the question just came out even though I didn’t need to answer that. Maybe the change was so drastic that I had to confirm it.

Seeing me waver, Shouko asks in a somewhat shyly manner,

“…How is it…do, I look like a bride…?”

Maybe it’s because this girl looks like a stranger, or maybe it’s the atmosphere, or maybe it’s some other reason,; I just answered without thinking,

“—Um, no problems. At least no matter what, you don’t look like a bridegroom.”

The fleeting thought of ‘it’ll be depressing if Shouko’s wearing a wedding gown that doesn’t suit her’ got thrown far away. ‘You don’t look like a bridegroom’—I guess it’s a good job that I managed to at least say something.

“…Yuuji…”

Shouko called my name softly as she hugs the bouquet of flowers into her arms.

And then, she seems to be stunned as she remains rooted to the spot.

“Oi, oi, Shouko…?”

What’s wrong? She seems weird, was my answer weird?

Should I get over to her? I hesitate for a while. Just when I’m doing so, Shouko again says,

“…I’m so happy…”

The girl in front of me lowers her head and buries her face into the flowers.

She can no longer say anything more as she can only tremble silently.

“What, what’s going on? The bride seems to be crying?”

As if remembering his own job, the audio broadcast can be heard again.

Is she about to cry? I only noticed it when the host said it. Lowering her head, her shoulders trembling—Shouko’s crying silently in front of me.

“Oi, Shouko, what’s…”

The veil and the bouquet of flowers prevents me from seeing her face clearly. Why is she crying?

The originally silent audience starts to chatter loudly for some reason, and yet Shouko’s able to say to me in an audible voice,

“…Because…this has always been my dream…”

A hoarse voice reaches my ears.

“A dream, huh?”

“…Ever since I was little, I always dreamed of being Yuuji’s bride…always had this dream …of having a wedding that belongs only to Yuuji and me…but, I can’t possibly do it on my own, this dream of mine…”

The normally silent Shouko tries her best to say out some words, creating a weird feeling within me.

Because ‘that incident’ when we were young caused her to harbor affections only for me. The affections were merely supposed to be out of guilt and responsibility—but why must this person here remain so steadfast in her beliefs.

“…So…I’m really happy…to be able to do this, not with anybody else, but with Yuuji…”

Saying all the way till her, Shouko can no longer talk further as she weeps silently.

At this moment, the sound of someone blowing the nose can be heard. Is the audience touched to tears? Some people’s tear glands are really weak.

“So she’s actually crying out of happiness! Our bride here is still as focused as ever. How will the groom react to the bride’s confession?”

How should I respond? Do I need to say it? No matter the time or place, what I should do is to correct this person’s incorrect thinking.

Thinking about this—unbelievably, I can’t even utter a single word.

“Shouko, I—”

“Ah~ ah~ so boring~”

Just as I was about to finally say something, a loud voice can be heard from the audience. I immediately shut my mouth. Even though I don’t know what’s going on, maybe I got all dizzy or something. Maybe I can say that it was god’s grace to prevent me from saying something.

“Such a boring event~ forget about those boring things, can’t we have a performance or something~?”

“That’s right~ we have no interest in listening to your love story.”

Seems like the people who saved me were those two idiots. Their voices can be heard amongst the now silent crowd.

“Speaking of which, what 'being a bride was what I always wanted? Or what? Are you acting pure? Is this what the workers here to you to say? How idiotic is that? It's so disgusting it makes me sick!”

“Are you playing a pure love game? We don't want to waster our precious time on you people~ does that woman have a problem? I find it comical no matter how I hear it~”

“I know! That was a comedy just now right? That's right, where will there be anyone in this world with such a disgusting dream!?”

“Eh~ was that a comedy? It's really comical~”

Those two continue to mock Shouko one after another, but—

“WHAT DID YOU SAY!? SAY THAT AGAIN IF YOU DARE!!”

“AH, AKIHISA-KUN, PLEASE CALM DOWN! YOU'LL RUIN THIS EVENT IF YOU GET SO WORKED UP!”

The angry roar could be heard through the broadcast, and the sounds of violence can be heard from behind the stage. Seems like a certain idiot can't control his anger after hearing those words.

Where is he throwing his tantrum from? I turn my eyes from the couple below the stage to look behind.

But even though I took only a short glance—

“Wh-where's the bride? Where did the bride go?”

Shouko disappeared from the stage. What's left at the place where she was standing are a small bouquet of flowers and a wedding veil.

“..Sigh, really can't stand her.”

I picked up the veil that she threw onto the floor.

The veil that was supposedly as light as a feather now seems a lot heavier after being stained by Shouko's tears.

“Kirishima-san? Kirishima Shouko-san? Dear guests, please help us find the bride!”

The workers are now as anxious as ants on hot water.

Hm, seems like they have to end this wedding experience event. Now that the event they put so much effort in can only end as failure, those thick-skinned people at Kisaragi Highlands are definitely going pale.

“Mr, Mr Sakamoto! Please help us find the bride!”

One of the workers in the hall pants as he runs towards me, probably trying to ask me where that person ran off to.

“Sorry, I'll pass. It's troublesome, and I really want to go to the toilet.”

“Eh? Wa-wait a minute Mr Sakamoto!”

I turn around and leave while still hearing the cries of that worker, and he can only give up reluctantly after seeing me being unwilling to help. Really, if you have the time to ask me, how about you just search for yourself? That'll be faster right?

I get into the prepared crowd as I leave the hall. 5 minutes later, I found my target. Good thing they haven't gone too far off.

“Oh my, that was sooo funny~”

“Yeah, I always...dreamed of marrying you—how was it? Does it look like it? Is it cute?”

“Ahh, that was so like it. But—of course it's disgusting! Who will find it cute!?”

“Ya~”

Finally found them. Let's just settle this once and for all.

I slowly walk towards those two and said as I arrive behind them.

“Oi, you two.”

“Ahhh, what is it!?”

The coffee-colored faces of the two jerks turn to face me.

Those two are the ones who helped me and prevented me from falling into a human life grave. I really have to thank them.

“Ryouta, isn't this guy the one who acted as the groom?”

“Seems like it. WHAT DO YOU FAUX-GROOM WANT US FOR, SAY IT!”

The guy walked forward as he threatens me.

“Oh well, nothing much actually—”

I take off my western coat that I borrowed and loosen my tie. Unbelievable, my body's already so hot even without me doing any warm-ups

“—Let's just have a few words.”

<center>☆</center>

“Yo, you kept me waiting for quite a while.”

“...Yuuji.”

Standing in front of a hotel in Kisaragi Highlands, Shouko finally exits the passageway as she keeps her head down.

“Okay, time to go back.”

I help Shouko carry the large bag that she took back from the fake foreigner as we walk slowly towards the train station.

“...”

Shouko doesn't say anything at all as she silently follows me.

We silently walk down the path to the train station in this sunset.

I don't know how long we walked, but while we're walking that's pretty empty, Shouko finally asks softly,

“...Yuuji.”

“...What is it?”

“...Is my dream..weird?”

She must be bothered by the idiotic couple's mockery.

Shouko stopped, and though her head's lowered to prevent me from seeing her face, I can tell what her expression is.

“This, well, maybe it isn't ordinary.”

I chose my words carefully before making this reply.

“...”

Shouko again remains silent.

The reason why I answered like this is because in these not-so-short 7 years., she always harbored this one unshakeable dream as she stuck onto me. But now that her dream got mocked and denied in front of so many people, I can't even imagine how she feels.

But even so, I don't intend to lie just to comfort her.

“I'll use this chance to state this clearly, your feelings towards me are just derived from that past guilt you had.”

The event that happened 7 years ago was the key reason why Shouko thinks that she fell for me. Up till now, I'm still regretful of that incident. If I had handled it a little better, maybe it wouldn't have ended up like this.

Because of that, that person wasted her time on this useless bum here.

Thus, I have a need to tell her directly 'you're mistaken'—in order to prevent her from wasting time on such a thing.

“...Yuuji...”

Shouko gasped. Maybe this is a blow to her when I said this.

“But—”

But I have no need to hurt her. What's wrong is how this person here understands her feelings, but being able to harbo such feelings for just one person for this long is something she should be proud of.

So I have to tell her this. She isn't completely wrong, she just made a mistake in her target. However, her dream isn't wrong, and it's not strange at all.

“—But then, I won't laugh at your dream. Your dream is amazing, it won't lose to anyone, so you have to be confident of yourself.”

I put the thing that I picked up at the hall on Shouko, who has her head down.”

“However, you cannot mistake who you're going for.”

To have a wedding experience, it shouldn't be bad to have a memory like this, right?

“...This is...the headdress from...just now...”

Shouko reaches her hands out and receives the pure white headdress of the wedding gown as she lifts head head and stares at me in shock.

Seeing her so shocked, I suddenly feel somewhat awkward as I turn my head away.

Ah, now that I mentioned it, I have something else I have to tell her no matter what.

“Also, Shouko—”

I stare at the fading sunset and say softly—

“—The bento was delicious.”

I put the already lighter bag onto Shouko's hands.

“...Ah...my bento. Yuuji, you...notice...?”

“Okay, let's hurry up and head back. We'll be misunderstood if we stay out for far too long.”

“...Yuuji.”

“Especially my mom, no matter how I explain it—”

“Yuuji!”

It's been a while since I heard her speak so loudly, and I inadvertenly stop.

“What is it?”

I replied her call with my usual calm attitude.

Just as I tilt my head to face her, in the orange sunset, I see someone raising the headdress—”

“I didn't make a mistake after all!”

I see—my childhood friend smiling brightly at me.

<center>☆</center>

“Yo, Akihisa.”

Hm? Morning Yuuji, what's up?”

“You did quite a number to me at Kisaragi Highlands, huh?”

“Hahaha, what are you talking about? I was playing computer games at home the entire day, how can I possibly go to Kisaragi Highlands?”

“...Really? Well, you can act dumb all you want.”

“Wh, what are you saying? That's so weird~”

“Oh yeah, I got a present for you.”

“Eh? What is it?”

“This is a two-persons ticket to a highly-rated love story movie that's being aired right now. IF YOU HAVE 'SOMEONE YOU LIKE', JUST BRING HER OUT.”

I deliberately increase my volume for everyone in the classroom to hear.

“A two-persons ticket? Uu—even if you give me this, I don't really know who to ask.”

“So be it then.”

I stuff the ticket into Akihisa's hand and turns to walk away.

“Ah, Aki! I want to watch a movie this weekend~”

“Ah, Akihisa-kun! I just so happened to have a movie that I want to watch!”

“Eh? What's going on? Why do you two have such killing intent? I just want to pawn this ticket away for my daily funds—OWWWWW! THEY'RE ABOUT TO BE PULLED OUT! SEVERAL IMPORTANT PARTS OF MY BODY ARE GOING TO BE PULLED OUT BY YOU!!!”

The expected cries of anguish and pain can be heard from behind.

Really...who asked you to pull such a twisted plan in the first place, you big idiot.

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| Back to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_The Sakamoto Couple's Secret Love Technique Lecture|The Sakamoto Couple's Secret Love Technique Lecture]]
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| Forward to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Tsuchiya and Kudou's Mini Sex Life Story|Tsuchiya and Kudou's Mini Sex Life Story]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

Hidan no Aria:Volume6 Chapter1

2011-05-01T13:21:18Z

Caolsei:

==1st Ammo: Manhunt==

--SVD Sniper Rifle (T/L note: Snayperskaya Vintovka Dragunova)

A slender body design, with a great aesthetic design.

It is very light, and it far surpasses other sniper rifles.

Also, its durability and reliability are not bad, and it is one of the world-class sniper rifles.

"Wa, wait. Wait a moment."

SVD sniper rifle is entirely different than the sniper rifles which only have shooting as an advantage.

In a hostile environment it won’t receive damage, it can continuously shoot through the semi-automatic function, and also, on the peak, there’s a bayonet, and making it usable as a pike……it’s a ‘real combat type’ sniper rifle that is frightening.

“Why are you unhappy……Reki!”

That muzzle, for now, was pointing directly at me.

The one holding the rifle was the Snipe division’s genius, Reki.

She is someone who has the potential of a genius, the S-ranked butei in the same grade as me.

“——You and Aria, cannot be united.”

Without any tone in her voice, Reki replied the same way as she did previously.

Behind her, there was a bit of Tokyo’s chilly night view, with today’s night’s huge moonlight blooming of radiance.

I was stirred up by the sight of that scene with a feeling of uneasiness……

“United……is what?”

After she spoke those weird words, I was slightly blushing.

Just then, Aria and me——

After clearing the Inquesta, we were on this roof. Under the sunset. Just us two.

Looking like this, maybe it looked like a scene of a pair of intimate man and woman who loves each other.

But, why did Reki, who seemed to have seen us two do that kind of thing, draw her gun!?

“Don’t……don’t say rubbish. The relationship between Aria and me isn’t that kind. It should be just the opposite, just then we were
saying……that, from now on……we will be separated. Us two.”　

“Were you talking about breaking up?”

“What, what do you mean by ‘breaking up’?”

“If it’s like this, than it is even better. Because Kinji-san, can be my husband without being bothered.”

That, that point.

Only that point.

The weirdest thing would be that point.

After chasing Aria from here, Reki is now pointing her rifle at me……

(And actually, proposed to me!)

“Reki, you, why are you talking about ‘marriage’……!”

Also, from the beginning, I have the Hysteria Syndrome in my body. I must live far away from women.

That you, actually say ‘marriage’. What the heck is that!

“——If it’s like this, Kinji-san can become ‘Ulus’.”

“Ulus…...?”

“It means ’family member’” (T/L note: Ulus is in Mongolian.)

Family……family member?

I don’t understand. It becomes more and more complicated.

My desire to cry is rising more and more.
“It’s not wrong, that after marriage the man and the woman will become family members. ……But I already have my brother, so it’s more than enough for me. If you want to have family members, you can go consider someone else as a parent.” <!—Kira: Don’t really understand that part.-->

I said that, trying to evade it.

“ ‘The wind says, that it’s you’ ”

Reki, said that with her previous hard tone.

“ ‘The wind says, that it can only be you’ “

——That tone, seemed to have an inexplicably strong confidence.

Her pupils, which look like lenses, were fixing at me so she could shoot.

It is really transparent, the sniper rifle’s viewer.

(……What the heck is that……!)

This Reki, is different from the usual Reki.

This girl’s nickname is ‘Robot Reki’. She's clearly a no words, no emotions, no expression girl. But the Reki now, is making me feel some inexplicable intensity, with the consciousness of a target.

——As if, she has received an order.

“Lis-listen to me. Reki.”

I wanted to move my body out of her shooting line, and stepped back a bit as if it was nothing.

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3.5 Me and Thugs and a Love Letter

2011-04-29T10:02:56Z

Caolsei:

==Me and Thugs and a Love Letter==

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 051.jpg|thumb|Me and Thugs and a Love Letter]]

'''Hello Yoshii Akihisa-kun:'''

'''I'm sorry to write this letter to you so suddenly, but I have something that I really want to tell Yoshii-kun, so this is why I started to write this letter.'''

'''Does Yoshii-kun still remember me? We were in the same class during third grade, you know. From that moment, I always felt that Yoshii-kun's a really interesting person, and is always the one that cheers others up. No matter what happens, you'll always stand up to encourage everyone. When I was class rep once, you helped me out a lot. I really think that Yoshii-kun's really amazing. Though I didn't join you and play around, my heart always felt warm whenever I see Yoshii-kun, whether it's the classroom or the field.'''

'''When we were in Middle school, although we didn't manage to be in the same class, I continued to hear rumors of you. When we occasionally met each other, my heart would beat really fast. Isn't that strange? Why is it so? I often asked myself.'''

'''Maybe it's a coincidence, but when I heard that you entered the same High school as me, I was really happy.'''

'''During the summoning exam, you stepped up to protect me immediately. At that moment, I couldn't fool myself anymore—I think, maybe I love you...until now, I finally realized my feelings for you.'''

'''I love you.'''

'''Right now, it took me all of my courage just to express my feelings to you. Will it be good to let Yoshii-kun understand my feelings and slowly bond ourselves together?'''

'''This letter's basically my own feelings for you, so I'm really sorry. If you have someone you're dating or like, then I'm really sorry about it.'''

'''But then,. But then, I really love you. I love you the most.'''

<center>☆</center>

“Ooo~ how did I end up coming to school this early?”

Such a clear sky today, the air sure is clean, and the sunlight drenches my body as I walk on.”

It's less chaotic and squeezy when I go to school early today, as if I'm on a quiet empty street. How refreshing.

“The ancient people said that the early bird catches the worm. Don't know what i'll get today~”

After school yesterday, I thought of taking a nap, only to unexpectedly sleep till daylight, so I ended up waking up 2 hours earlier than usual.

Once I woke up, I came to school without thinking. However, the weather today's so good, I knew I should have done my laundry first.

“Let's see, what should I do first—hm?”

While pondering and walking, I suddenly find a familiar figure in frong of the school gate. Short-hair cut, light brown skin and sturdy muscles; isn't that Iron—let me try that again, isn't that Nishimura-sensei? Either way, he's still my homeroom teacher. Better say hello to him.

“Morning, sensei!”

I energetically greeted him from behind. Ironman turns back with a light-hearted smile that I never saw before.

“Oh, morning. Participating in morning club activities? How—”

He stopped.

“Sensei?”

“—Sorry, I was mistaken.”

“You mistook me for someone else? Aiya, no need to specially apologize to me for that.”

“What are your intentions for coming to school so early, Yoshii?”

The moment he said this, the light-hearted smile on his face is replaced with a wary expression.

“Eh..so sensei's mistake is the attitude to me?”

Did I really do so many bad things...?

“As a teacher, it's obvious that I have to be wary of you, but it's just nice that you're here. With that 'punishment inspector' ability of yours, I'll have less things to do.”

“Woah, speaking of that 'punishment inspector', you're going to make me work?”

“That's right. Go keep those old goal posts.”

“Really, I shouldn't have come so early...”

I can't help but sigh.

'Punishment inspector'—this is the method of punishment that the 'test summoning system' of our Fumitzuki Gakuen uses. The main idea is to follow the teachers' orders and do all sorts of oddjobs.

This 'test summoning system' is a coincidence formed by science and the supernatural. Since this decides the strength of the summoning system, Fumitzuki Gakuen is a test school that uses this as an incentive to encourage students to study hard. The school's protocol is to use the summoned beasts to fight, and this will definitely pump the students up better than ordinary tests.

“You should be regretful of the attitude that turned you into a 'punishment inspector' and not about coming to school early today, right?”

Ironman looks like he has given up as he sighed deeply.

“Uu...but I haven't done anything so bad that the Heavens won't condone it...”

“...You actually have the cheek to say such words? Enough talk, hurry up and get onto the field.”

“Okay, okay.”

Being led by Ironman, I unhappily entered the field. Those who're running on the track, are they track members doing morning exercie? They sure look energetic.

“It's your turn, Yoshii.”

“Got it—summon.”

Under Ironman's supervision, I summoned my summoned beasts.

The many magical arrays appear beside me, and a super-deformed version of me appears. The three-head sized body is cute, but one can't underestimate it's vicious strength. Though the strength of a summoned beast is decided by the caster's points. My points are still enough to be stronger than men by many times. However, it's just used to do oddjobs.

“Good, drag that goalpost away.”

“Okay~”

The summoned beast obeys my instructions as it easily carries the goalposts that's numerous times taller than it.

“Bring it to the dump outside the city.”

“HOW MANY KILOMETERS DO YOU THINK THAT IS, SENSEI!?”

At least give me a lorry to use!

“Just joking. Take it over a place it near the school gate. Be careful not to block the entrance.”

“What now, you scared me~”

“Thinking about the damages you caused, this level of punishment is nothing.”

“Uuu...”

Regarding that, I'm a bit sorry about that, but at least understand my circumstances...

“The net will have to be separate.”

“Sigh...looks like there won't be anything good today...”

Early bird catches the worm—who said so?

<center>☆</center>

I followed Ironman's instructions and took down the net. I then moved the goalposts over to the school gate. Without knowing it, I almost couldn't make it to self-study period. There's no time to move the net over to the gym storage room, so let's just go to class.

Just as I was thinking this as I open my shoe locker, there seems to be something similar to a love letter.

“WHA, WHAT'S GOING OOONNNN!!!”

This unexpected development caused me to shout out. Ca-ca-ca-calm down, Yoshii Akihisa! You'll die if you think too highly of yourself! Anyway, let's just check through the contents first--

“Yo, Akihisa, what's up?”

“WAAHH!!”

Someone just called my name. I frantically stuffed the letter into my pocket. That was scart!

“Ah, ahh, it's Yuuji. Morning.”

“Morning.”

Raising his hand to say hello to me is my classmate, Sakamoto Yuuji. This guy doesn't look like he has much of a brain, but he's still our class F's representative.

“Oh, oh my~ quite the nice morning! Sure feels like something good will happen this morning!”

“...Why are you so excited?”

“I, I I'm not excited or anything!”

“No way, right? I just saw something like a letter in your hand or something...”

Ugh! He saw it? If anyone sees me with this letter, those guys in our class will wallop me out of jealously!

“Just, just a pampley, that's all! Forget about that, we'll be late for self-study period if we don't hurry up.”

In order to avoid this, I immediately lift the soccer net up and rush forward. Truthfully though, we're really almost late.

“Oh, that late already? We're in school now, so it's a waste if you're late.”

Yuuji's running behind me. Good, seems like I managed to slip out of this.

And the next problem is—where should I read this letter? There'll be trouble if I read it in a crowded place...what should I do?

<center>☆</center>

“Kudou.”

“Here.”

“Kondo.”

“Here.”

We managed to dash into class just as the bell rang. Before we could even rest a bit, Ironman walks into the class and starts to take attendance. One can't really tell from his appearance, but he's really a punctual teacher.

“Kondo.”

“Here.”

“Saito.”

“Here.”

The calm and lazy attendance taking is of common procedure, and everyone in class replies Ironman in a sleepy tone.

This is a silent moment in class. In this spring morning, today's the same and the past, as we continue to welcome the peaceful daily—

“Sakamoto.”

“...Akihisa seemed to have gotten a love letter.”

“KILL HIM!!!”

—But Yuuji's words destroyed all the peace.

“Yu, Yuuji, what are you talking about!?”

I definitely lowered my volume, but it doesn't seem to get past everyone's ears. I really feel that there's something wrong with the students in this class.

“WHAT'S GOING ON! HOW DID YOSHII GET THAT LETTER!?”

“SINCE HE GOT IT, WE SHOULD BE ABLE TO! HURRY UP AND FIND IF THERE'RE ANY LOVE LETTERS NEAR OUR SEATS!!”

“NO! I CAN ONLY FIND A ROTTEN BREAD AND A HALF-EATEN BREAD!?”

“LOOK THOROUGHLY!”

“...FOUND IT! IT'S A SEALED BREAD!'

“WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR!!?”

The angry roars start to echo throughout the class. As I expected, these guys have gone crazy with jealously.

“YOU PEOPLE BETTER SHUT UP!'

—Silence.

Ironman's violent roar caused the entire class to turn silent. Ho, good, good.

“Tezuka.”

“Must kill Yoshii!”

“Todo.”

“Must kill Yoshii!”

“Tozawa.”

“Must kill Yoshii!”

“EVERYONE CALM DOWN! WHY DID IT BECOME 'MUST KILL YOSHII'!?”

“KEEP QUIET, YOSHII!!”

“SENSEI, YOU SHOULDN'T BE SCOLDING ME, RIGHT? IF THIS KEEPS UP, EVERYONE IN CLASS WILL BEAT ME, KICK ME AND DEAL WITH ME THROUGH ALL SORTS OF VIOLENT MEANS!”

“Nitta.”

“Must kill Yoshii!”

“Fuda.”

“Must kill Yoshii viciously!”

“Negishi.”

“Must kill Yoshii and dice him up!”

They, they aren't listening at all...why are these guys so troublesome.

“Alright, no one's late or absent today, so I hope that everyone can study hard today.”

After the attendance was taken, Ironman walks out of the classroom. Doesn't this guy notice the terrifying killer intent in this classroom at all?

“WAIT, SENSEI! DON'T LEAVE! DON'T ABANDON YOU CUTE STUDENT!”

In order to protect myself, I tried all I could to stop Ironman. It's no longer time to save face.

“You're wrong, Yoshii.”

Ironman's places his hand on the door as he replies. I'm mistaken? What's he trying to say?

“You're one extremely ugly guy.”

“I NEVER THOUGHT OF HEARING THAT, YOU BIG IDIOT!”

“Everyone got to pay attention to class.”

“PLEASE WAIT, SENSEI!!! SENSEI15:58, 26 April 2011 (UCT)”

My cry was ever empty and agonizing, but Ironman has already walked out of the classroom, not even looking back. Looks like I can only face all the terrifying killing intent that's flowing in the classroom. Before the first period teacher arrives, there'll definitely be a rain of blood.

“Aki~ can you please explain?”

Suddenly, a strong force nearly dislocated my joints as the hands grabbed my shoulders.

“Ah, ah haha...Minami, you look really scary, you know?”

“You received a letter? Who wrote it to you? What was it about?”

Though she's smiling, the slightly trembling hands seem to be trembling hard, as the butterfly knot on the ponytail seem like a devil's horn. That expression's really terrifying.

“Ah...that...that...”

Truthfully, as I was in a rush, I kept the letter without reading it, so I don't know what is it about. Speaking of which, I want to ask you what kind of letter it is. Uu~I realy want to hide alone somewhere and read the contents!

“Don't talk too much, hurry up and hand me your fingers—no, that letter!”

What! What will happen to my fingers if I don't do so?

“That, Yoshii-kun...”

A voice that's as delightful as a silver bell rings behind me.

“Hm? Yes?'

The one who spoke is the rose among the thorns in our class—Himeji Mizuki-san. Soft fluffy hair, soft looking breasts, a cute looking face; seeing her like this, I guess it'll be another day of guys working hard to chase after her.

“That...if possible, that...I, I want to read that letter as well...”

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 063.jpg|thumb]]

Nudge nudge, shy looking Himeji-san's really cute! But even so, I can't just let her do so.

“Erm...sorry.”

Thus, I honestly apologized to her, since I don't want to reveal the contents of the letter.

“But, but...”

I already refused, yet Himeji-san's not giving up. However—

“Even if it's Himeji-san's request, I can't agree to that.”

“But, I don't want to do something cruel to Yoshii-kun!”

“HOLD ON A MINUTE! IS HIMEJI-SAN GOING TO JOIN THE RANKS OF THOSE WHO'RE GOING TO BULLY ME!?”

To think that Himeji-san has become one with the low-scoring class F.

“Everyone please calm down.”

Just at this moment, a clapping sound can be heard from the frontdesk. The one who spoke up is our class F's representative, my bad friend Sakamoto Yuuji.

“Right now, the problem isn't to read the letter Akihisa got.”

The words that Yuuji said sure are convincing. Hmm, that's the way! Even if he's completely corrupted, we're still friend.

“The problem is—WHAT KIND OF WEIRD MEANS ARE WE GOING TO DEAL WITH AKIHISA!!!”

“THE PROPOSAL'S ALL WRONG, YOU DAMNED Itsuki!!!”

I immediately grabbed my bag and dashed out of the classroom at the fastest speed I could muster. Right now, I can only rely on myself!

“DON'T YOU DARE ESCAPE! FORM GROUPS AND HUNT HIM DOWN!!!”

“TAKE HIS LETTER AWAY!!! KILL YOSHII!!”

“SEARCH AND DEATH!!!”

“WE MUST AT LEAST WRECK HIM!!”

I could hear all the roars from the corridor. Again, I felt it first-hand that if it's this kind of things, our class F becomes more united.

<center>☆</center>

“FOUND YOSHII!! HE'S RUNNING TO AN EMPTY CLASSROOM!”

“ROGER THAT! HURRY UP AND CHASE HIM! DON'T LET HIM GET AWAY! I'LL CONTACT EVERYONE!!”

“OK! SQUAD B WILL MOVE FROM THE FRONT, SQUAD C WILL CUT HIM DOWN FROM THE SIDE!”

“ROGER!”

While dashing madly down the corridor, I could hear this conversation.

They actually gathered in groups in such a short time to hunt me down. Why is our class F acting in such an overkill manner when it comes to this useless trivial stuff!?

Alright! Since you want it like this, I'll show no mercy!

“HAND OVER THAT LETTER, YOSHII!!!”

“FOR YOU TO GET HAPPINESS IS LIKE A DREAMER'S TALK!”

5 classmates have already blocked my getaway. They should be the ones from the group ordered to surround me, and there're also some guys behin me.

Unable to do anything, I can only hide in the abandoned classroom, and everyone chasing after me have barricaded the classroom tightly.

Seeing me hide inside, they all stood outside the entrance to prevent me from escaping. But for me who's being chased, this definitely is the best chance.

“Watch this!”

I got ready to attack.

My attack is the soccer net that I took down this morning. I toss it right at their heads.

“Wha, what's going on?”

“Calm down! This is just a net! The ones on the outside, hurry up, get out and get Yoshii.”

“Damn it, the net is wet. It's sticking onto the bodies~~”

Being stunned and yet able to make the correct decision immediately, i'll give you that. But unfortunately, you guys are a tad too late!”

“You guys just need to rest on the sickbay's beds.”

I'm definitely holding onto something dangerous. My trapped classrooms widen their eyes in disbelief.

“WHAT! YOSHII, THAT'S...”

“RUN AWAY! EVERYONE GET OUT FROM THE NET!!!”

“Good night, everyone.”

I tossed the activated taser at the wet net. The next moment, there's a cackling sound and some burnt smell.

“WWWAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!”

Hearing my classmates let out blood-curdling screams, I walk out of the classroom.

If I want to read the letter in a quiet place, I'll have to immobilize everyone in class F. if so, I can only fight till the very end!

<center>☆</center>

“Where did that Yoshii run off to? I definitely saw him run down here!”

“Be careful, he should be hiding nearby.”

“Squads F and G have been eliminated. There's only one enemy, but don't let down your guard.”

in the old books storage room in the old school building, my classmates start to exchange words with each other. Maybe they're acting rather wary since I took down quite a few groups through violent means. I peeped from being the bookshelf, and sees that they're leaning their backs against each other to hide any blind spots.

But if they;re gathered together, they'll bind themselves together. Don't they understand this?

I held my breath as I move to the bookshelf near them. I then sneakily pulled one book out and threw it to another corner—BAM!

“What's that sound?”

“Is it Yoshii?

Everyone reacted to the sound as they turn their heads to the same direction. If so, wouldn't there be a blind spot already.

“Rea~dy!”

Next, all I need to do is to push the bookshelf down.

“WHAT!”

“DAMN It—!”

At this moment, since they have already turned their attention to the other side, even if they realize that the bookshelf is collapsing here, they can't react in time, and thus everyone was crushed under the bookshelf.

“HAHA! THOSE WHO TRIES TO OBSTRUCT OTHERS' LOVE PATH WILL END UP LIKE THIS!'

From the corner of my eye, I glanced at my classmates who're trying to crawl out from the bottom of the bookshelf as I walk out of the old books storage room.

“DAMN YOU, YOSHII! YOU TRAITOR!”

“DON'T YOU DARE FORGET THIS! WE'LL DEFINITELY WRECK YOUR HAPPINESS!”

“...Really, how twisted are these guys?”

Once I walked out of the old books storage room, I immediately got a broom to hold the entrance down and block it completely. Seems like I dealt with all my pursuers.

“Good good, now all that's left to do is—WAAAHHH!!!”

A bad presence caused me to instinctively take a few steps backwards. At the place where I was, there're many ball-point pens and sharp knives there're stabbed onto the floor.

“Who's there!”

“...Traitors must atone for their sin with death.”

Holding all sorts of stationery in his hands is my classmate Tsuchiya Kouta. This guy has quite the overwhelming pervertedness, yet he tries to hide it. His nickname is Muttsulini, and he's my friend—no wait, he's no longer my friend, but an enemy I have to take down!”

“Get ready, Muttsulini!”

I clench my fist and dash forward. Sorry, but you have to quietly rest here!

“...I'll throw a penknife next.”

“Alright, then let's talk it through,”

I can't exert violence on my good friend!

“...Got it.”

“Say your request first.”

Though I said it, I knew what he will request. He'll say something like 'hand that letter over'. Let me see, what should I use to negotiate with him?

“...My request is—”

Muttsulini coldly states his request

“—to murder you.”

“HOLD ON A MINUTE! WHY DID YOU JUST JUMP STRAIGHT TO MY EXECUTION!”

I have never went through such a difficult negotiation.

“...Deal broken.”

“Damn it! Looks like I can only do this the hard way!”

I gather all my concentration and aims at the penknife in Muttsulini's hand.

Speaking of which, it's just a love letter. Is there really a need to start slaughtering friends?”

“...Don't worry. I won't aim at your eye.”

“Muttsulini, I'm not an idiot who'll be relaxed after hearing what you said!”

“...Really?”

Whoosh! The penknife lets out an air-ripping sound as it attacks me. The target is—MY RIGHT EYE!

“YOU, YOU LIED!”

I immediately use my hand to block it, and the penknife drops onto the floor. Eh? It didn't hit me? Was the blade not unsheathed?

“...An opening.”

“Uu!”

Muttsulini came rushing in just as I was stunned. Damn it!

“Muttsulini, do you know Himeji-san's bust measurement?”

In order to protect my own life, I frantically mentioned something Muttsulini will be interested in. please take the bait, you huge silent pervert!

“...This is common knowledge!”

No way, I can't shake his concentration at all! Speaking of which, is this really common knowledge? I don't even know!

“Then, then, once I get a girlfriend, I'll send those precious treasures to you, is it alright?”

“...(stops.)”

Muttsulini suddenly stopped. Good! He took the bait!

“...When?”

This friend of mine is one guy that can't be underestimated. He actually went directly to confirming the time instead of confirming the contents and amount.

“Let me think, how about next week?”

“...Deal made.”

To think I actually bribed him like this. I'll use this to deal with him the next time I end up as an enemy of Muttsulini.

“Then I'm going.”

Just as I step aside and prepare to leave, Muttsulini suddenly reaches his hand out to block me. Is there anything else?

“...This is for you to protect youself.”

While saying this, Muttsulini thrusts a small bag at me.

“Protect me?”

“...There're some knives inside. Take them out if anything happens.”

To be honest, these knives should be illegal. However, these are things that I'm really grateful for, since there're still a few people that I haven't took down, and they're definitely antagonistic towards me.

“Thanks. I'll use them when i'm in a fix.”

“...(Thumbs up).”

After giving me a thumbs up, Muttsulini turns away and leaves. I can't continue to stay here. Got to find a place to read that letter. It'll be bad if the letter reads 'I'll be waiting for you at the rooftop during lunchtime' and I can only read this in the afternoon.

“Oh yeah, I better go to the roof to check on everyone.”

No one should be at the roof. If so, I can go there and read the letter properly. Also, that place may be where the confession will take place. Okay, I decided, let's head to the roof!

Right now, I'm on the second level. Got to climb up the stairs if I want to get there.

And thus, on the platform of the stairs—

“I finally found you, Aki!”

“GACK! MINAMI!?”

My eternal nemesis is here.

The killing intent that's radiating from her body is already killing my muscles, and it seems like it'll explode the moment she touches me.

I tighten my nerves, trying to find a way to get past the second level platform. Unexpectedly, she continues to step forward in a calm manner, saying out her requests for me to choose from.

“Either you hand me the letter and let me kill you or let me kill you before taking the letter. Choose one.”

That's strange, why can't I choose an option where I can remain alive?

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT! IT SHOULD BE NONE OF MINAMI'S BUSINESS IF I GET A LETTER, RIGHT!?”

Basically, this is her fault anyway! It'll be great if I can defuse this crisis.

“Unrelated to me? Really...you really think so, Aki...”

“Eh?”

Minami looks like she got really hurt or something. I reconsidered what I just said. Is there anything wrong with me getting a girlfriend?”

“Do you mean...”

“This fact is really embarrassing, so I didn't mention it just now, but I, you...”

Completely different from her ferocious expression, Minami right now looks so pitiful. For some reason, my heat starts to race. What's with this feeling?

“Because of you, I got 3rd in the 'the girl you don't want to date the most' poll!”

“Farewell!”

What's this feeling? How about, monstrously terrifying!?

I followed my basic instincts and escape. Though I want to run off to the rooftop, I start to jump 3 steps down the stairs for the first time, all just to escape for this monstrous demon.

“You're still thinking of escaping? I won't allow you to gain happiness after being forced into despair like this!”

“There're still people who beat you in the poll! Isn't that good!?”

“What's good about that!? How many people do you think there are below me!?”

Let me see. There're about 300 students in the second year. So—

“About 150?”

“Hundred and fif...HOW DO YOU INTEND TO COMPENSATE!? TAKE RESPONSIBLITY!”

“Even if you ask me to, I can't!”

“Anyway, hurry up and hand that letter over!”

“I DON'T WANT TO! YOU'LL DEFINITELY RIP THAT LETTER TO SHREDS!”

“I WON'T DO THAT! I WILL PRINT DOZENS OF COPIES OF THIS LETTER AND SCATTER THEM ALL OVER THE SCHOOL TO PREVENT THIS FROM HAPPENING AGAIN!”

“ISN'T THAT SCARIER!!?”

Damn it! I really want to escape, but I just can't get away from her! Got to stop Minami!

“Oh yeah, Minami, while running down the stairs, I know—”

“What?”

“—you're wearing white today!”

“Wha...”

Minami suddenly stops and uses both hands to push her skirt down. Stupid girl! In this situation, will I even bother to look at your underwear!?

“WOOOHHH!!”

Using this window of opportunity, I immediately increase the distance between me and Minami. The chance to escape will die off soon!

After rushing down the staircase, I then dash down the corridor.

“Ah, Yoshii-kun. How can you run down the corridor?”

Ahh, there's no lessons now? Slowly walking down the corridor, the English teacher slowly noticed my presence. So it's Endo-sensei. Sure appeared at the right time.

“Sorry Endo-sensei, but I got asked to do errands.”

I stood in front of sensei to admit my mistake.

“You're asked to do errands?”

“Yeah, the teacher asked me to go to the empty classroom to move some desks back.”

This is definitely a lie, but Endo-sensei believes it without a second word.

“is that so? However, you can't run down the corridor.”

“I'll take note of that. Well, sensei, I have a little request.”

“Hm, what is it?”

“Those tables are rather heavy, so can sensei grant me permission to summon?”

I have to get a teacher's permission to summon a summoned beast.

“Aki! You dare to trick me!”

Damn it, Minami's catching up!

“Sensei, please follow me for a while!”

“Eh? Ah...okay.”

I dragged sensei over to one of the nearby classrooms. Good thing there're a lot of abandoned classrooms in the old building. Sure got saved now.

“Sensei! Please hurry up and grant me permission to summon!”

“Uu...i don't really know what's going on...okay, I'll allow you to summon.”

“Great! Summon!”

In response to my call, my summoned beast appears from the floating magic array. As long as this guy is around, I'll have no problems even if that enemy's Minami.

“I'm definitely wearing grassy-green underwear today! How could you see it as white!”

A second later, Minami appears. I don't really mind, but...

“Minami, you don't really have to tell me that.”

“Ah!”

My reminder caused Minami to blush heavily. If Muttsulini's to hear this, he'll be absolutely delighted.

“CHANCE!”

“WAH!”

While Minami's wavering, I pushed her into a corner of the classroom. And then—

“Heyo~ watch me!”

I already prepared my summoned beast to let the student's storage cupboard at the back of the classroom and use it to create a road block.

“Oi, what's are you doing! You're too despicable! Let me out!”

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 079.jpg|thumb]]

DONG DONG DONG!!! Minami slams hard at the storage cupboard. With the girl's strength of hers, she should be unable to move such a large thing. I finally rendered Minami powerless.

“What are you doing, Yoshii-kun!”

Seeing this, Endo-sensei lecture me, and the summoned beast immediately disappears. Seems like sensei cancelled my summoning right.

“Sorry! But this is an emergency!”

“Ah! Hold on a minute!”

Ignoring sensei, I again dash down the corridor. A while later, just a bit, and I can open the letter...thinking about this happiness, the dashing feet feel light and fleeting.

“I waited for you for a long time, Yoshii.”

My classmate Sugawa-kun is already getting into position as he waits there for me.

“Sugawa-kun, you're intending to stop me?”

“Of course, I want you to die right now.”

At the same time he said this, he pulled out something from his back.

“A, a wooden sword...”

“ borrowed this from the kendo club in order to stop you!”

“WAH! WOAH~~”

Without saying anything else, Sugawa-kun hacks over at me without holding back. I immediately dodged aside, and at least is barely able to avoid that attack.

“HAND OVER THAT LETTER, YOSHII!”

“Uu...”

I unconsciously bit my lip. To think that this guy will actually prepare a weapon. Right now, I have no chance of winning if I don't go all out. If I have some sort of a weapon—hm? A weapon?

“Oh ya, I still have that!”

I reached into my pocket and grab a small bag. That's right, this is what Muttsulini handed over to me just now, the bag that's full of knives.

“Uu! So you prepared some weapons as well!”

Knowing that his advantage no longer exists, Sugawa-kun seems rather impatient.

“Very good! Then we're even!”

I grabbed a knife from the bag and immediately shrink the distance Sugawa-kun.

Let's decide this now, Sugawa-kun!

“Damn it! I haven't lost yet!”

Sugawa-kun swings his wooden sword down. Unfortunately—

“Too weak!”

I took half a step aside, and his attack nearly hits me, only to miss. And having swung the wooden sword, Sugawa-kun is completely open for an attack as he stands in front of me. There're holes all over the place.

I haven't let a chance slip by, as I aim my nailcutter at Sugawa-kun—

“What the heck, how can I win with this nailcutter, this idiotic me!”

I dejectedly collapse onto the floor. Though it's true that a nailcutter is a type of knife.

“Yoshii...you're one huge idiot...”

Sugawa-kun's pitifully gazes at me.

“Da, damn it! If that's the case, I'll use the nailcutter on you! At least it's better than fighting barehanded!”

“That's not right, isn't it? No matter how I think, you'll have a better chance of winning if you go barehanded, right?”

“SHUT UP!”

In this silent 3rd storey of the old building, Sugawa-kun and I exchanged roars.

“WAHH! MY FINGERNAILS! MY FINGERNNNAAAIIILLLSSS!!!”

From above, I stared down at Sugawa-kun, who's limp and clutching his hand painfully.

To think that I actually won this battle.

“I was rather shocked myself. But then, the most important thing right now is to go up. Sorry.”

“Yo, Yoshii...you traitor...”

Leaving behind Sugawa-kun, who someone's gasping even though I merely cut his fingernails off, I continue to climb up the stairs and head towards the roof. If I can get past the 4th level and past the roof—

“So you came, Akihisa!”

“Yoshii-kun, please surrender quietly.”

“It’s Yuuji and Himeji-san...”

While getting up the staircase, the ones blocking me are the great demon king—Yuuji and Himeji-san.

“How did you two know that I’ll come here?”

“Because the roof is the best place for a confession. With that simple brain of yours, you might think that you can watch over everyone’s actions here. So i guessed that you’ll come here.”

Damn it! As expected of Yuuji, he guessed all of my thought process accurately.

“You could have just hidden inside the toilet and read the letter without any interference.”

Ah!

“Sorry, Yuuji. I just got a stomachache. Got to go to the toilet.”

“Yoshii-kun. Don’t tell me you haven’t realized it?”

Himeji-san stares worriedly at me. I can’t stand that gaze!

“Yuuji, why must you stop me? Even if you do this, it wouldn’t be of any benefit to you, right?”

In order not to let him stick onto me any further, I got to make this clear.

Yuuji looks serious as he answers me.

“You’re right, i won’t get anything good from this. No, before that, i have no intention of getting a girlfriend.”

“If so, why...”

“That’s not the problem, Akihisa, I just...”

That bad friend stares at me without any hesitation and continues,

“—hate seeing you getting happiness!”

“You’re definitely the worst friend!”

Even I’m starting to wonder if we’re really friends.

“Akihisa, I won’t tell you something so old-fashioned like ‘hand that letter over’. Show me your best and bring it on.”

Yuuji takes off his coat and undoes his tie. Looking at the physique of this bad friend of mine, there’s no excess fat on his body. Those forceful looking muscle lines are what all men wants.

“Can you help me take my coat, Himeji?”

“Ah, okay.”

After passing his coat over to Himeji-san and undoing his tie, being unrestrained, Yuuji gets into position as he swings a few punches. Whoosh, quite a few sharp sounds. Just this alone, and I know the difference between an amateur and an expert. This guy...he’s really trying to kill me.

“Yoshii-kun, you better give up...”

Himeji-san moves beside me and looks worried as she stares at my face. It’s obvious why she would be worried for me; as what his appearance shows, Yuuji’s really used to fighting, and I don’t really have much of a chance if i go head on. But—

“Thanks for worrying about me, but I have no intention of giving up.”

For the girl who summoned enough courage to write this letter to me, for my own future, I can’t just run away here!

“Really...I understand. I won’t try to stop you again.”

“...Sorry, i know that you’re doing this for my own good.”

“No...it’s because this is Yoshii-kun’s style.”

“My style? Oh yeah, can you help me hold this?”

“Ah, okay.”

Like Yuuji, I took off my coat. My movements are definitely a lot smoother. Speaking of which, i haven’t fought seriously for a long time, and the opponent’s Yuuji this time. My body would actually tremble, and it shouldn’t be because I took off my coat.

“...Akihisa.”

“Bring it on, Yuuji.”

I clench my fist and got ready to fight.

If I beat this guy, i can just read the letter without any—

“...You’re really an idiot.”

“Eh?”

Yuuji looks rather listless, but he’s not staring at me—but the coat that Himeji-san’s holding onto.

“That, that letter, that letter should be in the pocket...can i read it?”

Himeji-san pulls the letter out from my coat pocket. Eh~ that’s...

“NO, NO!!! READING MY LETTER WITHOUT EVEN A FIGHT, THAT’S AGAINST THE RULES!!!”

“HOW STUPID CAN YOU GET!? DON’T CARE ABOUT HIM, HIMEJI! JUST DISPOSE OF THAT LETTER!”

Yuuji grabbed me just as I’m about to grab Himeji-san.

Damn it! I can’t get away! This perverted muscle freak!

“Eh? Isn’t this...”

Looking back at Himeji-san, she seems bothered by the letter she’s holding in her hand. Maybe she found it too easy to get and is afraid of what’s inside.

“...”

No, that’s not right. It shouldn’t be something like that. Himeji-san would show such an expression because she’s too kind and can’t bear to read a letter that someone else wrote or destroy it mercilessly. I see, so there’s a chance to win!

“Himeji-san.”

“Eh! Ah, yes, is there anything?”

“Actually I know, gentle Himeji-san can’t really stamp on other people’s feelings, so you better—”

“—Rip that letter apart.”

“NO! THAT’S NOT IT! YOU’RE TOO DESPICABLE, YUUJI! TO ACTUALLY ADD WORDS LIKE THAT! THIS IS BASICALLY AGAINST THE RULES!”

“Okay, I got it.”

“No, you shouldn’t be answering ‘okay’ just like that, right? HIMEJI-SANN! YOU DON’T HAVE TO REALLY TEAR THE LETTER LIKE THAT! I CAN’T POSSIBLY READ IT NOW! GIVE IT BACK! GIVE ME BACK MY HAPPY FUTURE AND WHAT I SAID 4 LINES AGO!”

Just as I screamed out in despair, the letter got torn to bits, and it’s no longer in its original shape as what’s left are scraps of the letter.

“Really, to think that Himeji will actually tear that letter herself...sorry Akihisa.”

Yuuji stares at Himeji-san in a shocked manner and then apologized to me. I’m shocked as well, because I thought that Himeji-san’s a girl who won’t do that sort of thing.

“At least let me do this.”

Yuuji said as he picks up all the scraps on the floor.

Yeah, now’s not the time to give up.

“Thanks Yuuji. I’ll bet on the last probability and fix these pieces of paper back!”

“—I’ll kill your last hope.”

Whoosh...burning...

Ah, how warm! The strong flames seem to melt my ice cold heart...

“GYAH! NO WAY! YOU ACTUALLY BURNED THE LETTER!? IS THERE A NEED FOR YOU TO DO THAT? IF SO, I DON’T HAVE ANY CHANCE OF READING THE LETTER ALREADY!? WHERE DID MY HAPPY FUTURE DISAPPEAR TO?”

“Akihisa, you may not understand...”

“WHAT? FORGET ABOUT THAT, HURRY UP AND GET A BUCKET OF WATER!!”

“The thing i hate most is your happiness.”

“WHO WILL UNDERSTAND THAT, YOU BIG IDIOT!? YOU DESPICABLE BASTARD!!”

No matter how hard I tried, that letter was burned to a pile of ash.

“Doesn’t Sakamoto-kun want to know who wrote that letter?”

Seeing the letter burned to ash, Himeji-san seems relaxed for some reason as she turns and asks Yuuji.

“I have no interest at all, since I just want to get rid of Akihisa’s happiness. Besides—”

“Be, besides what?”

“I can sort of guess who wrote that letter.”

“Eh?”

“If what you tore was ‘someone else’s’ letter, it will create quite the trouble, right?”

“That, that...this, this...”

I don’t really understand Himeji-san and Yuuji’s conversation. Do they know who wrote that letter?

“Yuuji! Repeat that again!”

“Ahh! Yoshii-kun can’t eavesdrop!”

“GYAH!!!”

“Himeji, Akihisa’s neck seems to be tilted back completely.”

“So, sorry! I actually did such a cruel thing.”

“Well, you don’t really have to worry about that. Besides, even if he remains alive now, he will be murdered by those guys.”

Squeezing off the last ounce of consciousness, I listen to the voices where Yuuji pointed to.

“A~KI-~ YOU ACTUALLY DARE TO DO SUCH A THING TO ME-~”

“I’LL DEFINITELY KILL YOU, YOSHII!!!”

“““KILL HIM!!! KILL HIM!!!”””

God, I beg you, allow me to safely see the sun tomorrow.

<center>☆</center>

How did that happen? That disappeared letter actually went into Yoshii-kun’s shoe locker! Someone must have picked it up and kindly put it in for me...

It’s because of me that you ended up suffering such a terrible thing...I’m truly sorry, Yoshii-kun.

But like what Yoshii-kun told me before, I hope I can convey my feelings not through a letter, but directly to you.

So, please wait for me.

<noinclude>
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|-
| Back to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Fumizuki News|Fumizuki News (An interview with Yoshii Akihisa from Class 2-F)]]
| Return to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_The Sakamoto Couple's Secret Love Technique Lecture|The Sakamoto Couple's Secret Love Technique Lecture]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3.5 Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～

2011-04-20T15:13:13Z

Caolsei:

==Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～==

'''Please fill in the correct name of the historical person in the blank below.'''

The person who instituted the rakuichi rakuza and abolished monopolies to promote business and economic growth is ______.

'''Himeji Mizuki’s answer:'''

“Oda Nobunaga”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Correct answer.

'''Shimada Minami’s answer:'''

“Chonmage”[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#]

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Gotten used to Japan already? Sensei’s a bit worried on seeing your answer.

'''Yoshii Akihisa’s answer:'''

“Nobu”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

You’re very familiar with him, aren't you?

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 007.jpg|thumb]]

After we shifted here, onee-chan seemed to be a lot more lethargic.

Is it because she’s being bullied at school? Or is it that there’s someone she finds irritating?

But then again, every time onee-chan talked about those classmates, it sounded really interesting. Onee-chan also seemed like she really likes them…

If so, why’s onee-chan so lethargic?

Is it because of school work? Onee-chan did say before the she has some difficulty.

I hope the onee-chan can recover soon.

It’s going to be onee-chan’s birthday, would onee-chan be motivated if I give her a huge plushie? Onee-chan always loved dolls after all.

Mm, let’s do that! I’ll buy a big big Noi doll for onee-chan to cheer her up!

…I wonder if I have enough pocket money?

<center>☆</center>

“EVERYONE FREEZE! PUT YOUR BAGS ON THE TABLE AND LET ME SEE WHAT YOU BROUGHT TO SCHOOL!”

Just right after morning self-study period started, the homeroom teacher in charge of our class, Iron—I’ll try that again, Nishimura-sensei, who’s in charge of our class, suddenly declared this without warning.

Argh! Not good! I brought nothing that’s related to attending lessons at all!

—Should I carry my bag and run away at the fastest speed I can?

For that moment, that idea appeared in my mind.

“Let me tell you beforehand, don’t ever think of running away!”

It’s a difficult task to run away from this homeroom teacher. Besides, this guy’s a brawny teacher with the moniker ‘ironman’. No matter how we try to run, he’ll use this body that’s trained for an ‘Ironman’ triathlon to pursue us relentlessly.

“Alright, I’m going to start checking. If there’s anything unrelated to attending lessons, I will confiscate them without leaving anything.”

Starting from the first row near the corridor, Ironman startst to check the contents of all the bags one by one and confiscate the poker cards and magazines that each person brought.

“Sakamoto, let me see what’s inside your pocket.”

Among us, one of the students has not only his bag, even his pockets are to be checked.

“…Damn it.”

Sakamoto Yuuji makes a sound in agony—he’s my best worst friend.

However, he still obediently rummages through his pocket and pulls out an MP3.

“As expected. I’ll be confiscating this.”

After saying this, Ironman puts Yuuji’s MP3 into his confiscation pouch. Yuuji, who never expected his pocket to be search through, glares at Ironman defiantly.

(This is a disaster, isn’t it, Yuuji?)

I whispered to Yuuji’s ear.

(Really a disaster. Would they normally check pockets? I’m the only one who got my pockets checked!)

(Can’t be helped. Who asked Yuuji to be such a bad person?)

(…Go to hell!)

Looking closely, it seems like Ironman’s method of checking will change according to the student. He’ll only ask the well-behaved students to open their bags and briefly look through their bags once. But for the ill-behaved students, he’ll check thoroughly, even including the inside bags of the bag.

“You’re next, Yoshii Akihisa.”

“Ah, yes.”

Ironman arrives in front of me. Even though I don’t think that he’ll ask me to rummage through my pockets like Yuuji—

“Take off your uniform first, and change into your P.E. attire.”

“Eh? Aren’t you being too wary?”

This level of trust far exceeds what I imagined.

“Well…Nishimura-sensei, for me to change in front of the girls, it’s a bit…”

“That won’t do. you may be hiding some prohibited item in your trousers, so take them out.”

“How can you do this! Even if it’s me, I can’t possibly go to that extent! You should at least trust me—”

Just as I agitatedly approached sensei, ‘CLACK!’, something seemed to drop out from the leg of my trousers.

“Oi, Akihisa, your NDS dropped out.”

I received the handheld gaming console that Yuuji nicely helped me picked up, and after saying thanks, I again face sensei.

“Sensei, believe in me, will you?”

“Forget about wearing P.E. attire.”

How, how is this possible! He’s actually even more wary now!

“You actually brought gaming consoles, manga, light novels, DVD…what one earth are you treating school as?”

My precious stuff are confiscated away, one by one. Speaking of which, why did he do a spot-check when I brought so many things out? The value of those confiscated items may total up to be tens of thousands yen.

“Are these all? I said before, the school is a place for you to learn knowledge, you are not allowed to bring anything unrelated to school.”

After searching, Ironman carried the confiscated items back to the podium. I won’t be able to see my precious again…

“Alright, since you people brought all these along, morning self-study will be cancelled. The first lesson will be ‘summoning practical’, all students are to immediately rush over to the gym.”

After saying this, Ironman carries all the confiscated items and leaves the classroom.

<center>☆</center>

“—Summon!”

Hearing the summoning call echo throughout the gym, I say to Yuuji, who’s beside me.

“…It’s only early morning and we’re already so unlucky.”

“Yeah, that MP3 I bought last month actually got confiscated, damn it.”

“Wah, that’s not too long ago.”

“That one was expensive, you know!”

Yuuji’s wild looking face shrivels with sadness as he continues to complain. I can understand~~this feeling.”

“Akihisa, you got your handheld games confiscated as well, right? There’s quite a few of them.”

“Mm…the total value should be over 30,000 yen.”

Handheld games, game software, DVDs and CDs; totaling up the value of all the confiscated items, the number 1 this time should be either me or Muttsulini. How unlucky…”

“Next, Himeji Mizuki, please step forward.”

“Ye, yes.”

“Oh, it’s Himeji now? Rare for her to wear a P.E. attire. Muttsulini, is it really alright not to take photos of her?”

“…My camera got confiscated.”

“I see, quite the pity. We’re in different classes, so it’s rare to see Himeji-san in a P.E. attire.”

“There’s only this one summoning practical.”

“…(Lowers head dejectedly).”

Muttsulini’s so depressed that he can’t even lift his head up. Sigh, this can’t be helped anyway.

Silky and smooth long hair, and cute and innocent look, an ample chest that seems to be self-aware and supports the uniform; Even if it’s not Muttsulini, any guy will want to take a photo of her pretty figure; I know that I definitely want to.

“Is, is this how you do it? Summon!”

Himeji-san doesn’t really seem confident as she mutters. A geometrical magic array appears beside her feet, and Himeji-san’s summoned beast appears in front of everyone.

“As expect of Himeji, her summoned beast sure looks impressive…”

“Yeah, and cute too.”

Himeji-san’s summoned beast looks really cute. Since a summoned beast is basically formed from the caster’s appearance, and since the caster’s already so cute looking, there’s no need to emphasize it further.

But speaking of which, what makes her summoned beast so impressive—

“Most likely, nobody else will be able to wield such a terrifyingly huge sword.”

“Yeah, only Himeji-san is able to do that.”

Her summoned beast is wielding a Western longsword that’s several times longer than her height, and she’s lifting it effortlessly. Anyone can tell that this summoned beast isn’t to be underestimated.

Class C, Himeji Mizuki, Combined subjects 3943 points.

Vs

Class C, Furukawa Ayumi, Combined subjects 1264 points.

The reference points appear in front of us. These are the results of the previous mid-term exams.

“I see, so that’s why she’s so strong.”

“It’s almost 4000 points. Himeji-san sure is smart.”

Mmm…holed up in a corner, we continue to nod our heads away.

The strength of a summoned beast is equivalent to the points that the owner gets. Since the test summoning system totals up the marks, basically, the higher amount of points a person gets, the stronger the summoned beast will be.

“Speaking of which, don’t Akihisa and Himeji know each other?”

“Mm~ she was my grade school classmate…but we haven’t spoken to each other for years. She should have forgotten about me, right?”

We’re in different classes right now, separated for a long time. If there’s a chance, I’ll definitely want to talk to her, but there’s no real chance for me to talk to any girl from another class. If I’m to go to her class and immediately say “Himeji-san, I got something to say to you”, this will look like a confession no matter what.

“I see, you’ll most likely be streamed into different classes next year. I can you can be erased from Hiemji’s memory.”

“Next year? Are you talking about the streaming exam?”

“Yeah, you definitely won’t be able to be in the same class as her anyway.”

“Now that you mentioned it, that’s right…”

After we entered school, we were streamed into different classes like other schools. But next year, things will be different. We’ll be sorted according to our grades. Though Himeji-san is in class C, when we become second-years, she’ll definitely be sorted into class A with those top grades of hers. If so, me and Yuuji will definitely be unable to be classmates with her since we’re just straddling about in class D anyway.

“I’ll be forgotten by her…this sure feels rather lonely…”

“Yeah, there’s no benefit for her to remember you anyway.”

“How can you say that!”

Just as we’re blankly seeing other classes battle it out and talking away—

“Next! Yoshii Akihisa and Shimada Minami!”

Ironman—let me repeat that again, this is the voice of our homeroom teacher, Nishimura-sensei.

Recovering myself, I find that those before me who were waiting to practice their summoning are all back.

“I’m going then.”

“Go then. You’re a ‘punishment inspector’ candidate anyway, go learn how to control a summoned beast properly.”

“…I say, I’m different from you Yuuji. I’m not some problematic kid!”

I rolled my eyes back at Yuuji. Really, what about being a ‘punishment inspector’? That’s really rude. Aren’t they saying that I’m a problematic student? Why is he calling me this when it’s basically the equivalent of being an idiot?

“Hurry up, Yoshii!!”

“Alright~”

Hearing Ironman roar at me, I hastily increase my pace.

Paying attention, the training partner has already finished her summoning.

“…”

The person stares at the summoned beast in front of her in shock. This girl with an energetic-looking ponytail and attractive long legs is my classmate, Shimada-san. At this moment, she reveals a slight melancholic look that doesn’t fit her. What happened? Why’s she looking so depressed and lethargic? Is her summoned beast even weak and useless than what she thought would be?”

“What’s wrong, Shimada-san? Are you shocked that your summoned beast is so weak?”

After saying this, I see that she seems to be healed by my gentleness. The grey clouds above her are gone, now replaced with a look of delight.

“Ah, so Yoshii’s the opponent. How delightful.”

Shimada-san slightly blushes. Seeing her so happy, I felt happy as well—oh my, to reveal her feelings to me in front of everyone like this, this kid’s really troublesome.”

“Because it’s great to beat up Yoshii.”

…This kid’s really troublesome!

“Shimada-san, the target’s the summoned beast, not us.”

I’m a little worried, so I confirmed the rules with her again. This is the summoning practical that’s meant for the summoning battles next year, so no matter what, this should be a battle between summoned beasts.

“You’re right, we won’t be fighting each other.”

Shimada-san immediately nodded her head in agreement. Great, seems like she understood.

“Since I’ll be the one dishing out the beatdown anyway.”

SEEMS LIKE SHE DIDN’T UNDERSTAND AT ALL!

“That, sensei, what Shimada-san did just now was an act of violence. If you have the time to check our belongings, you should do something about this case of school violence, right?”

“…Shimada, even if the opponent’s Yoshii, violence is bad.”

“But sensei…”

No buts. A no is a no, you understand?”

“…Yes.”

“Really…so you really understand? If so—”

Ironman suddenly reveals a smirk and says,

“—I’ll give you a special discount this time.”

“Eh? Aren’t those words really weird?”

Am I thinking too much? It seemed like a teacher just allowed a case of school violence!

“I’ll do my best!”

“Right, so you must work hard.”

“Ah haha, sensei, Shimada-san, you two are really stupid. Do you think that you two can beat me so easily? If so, I’m going to counter and beat you two—I’M SORRY, IT’S MY FAULT, PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!”

It’s useless even if I apologised.

Don’t tell me…that those cautious words of mine caused this disaster?

<center>☆</center>

“Ho…ever since morning inspection, it’s been one disaster after another today…”

After a day’s worth of lessons, it’s dismissal time. I’m chatting away with those guys who I usually talk to.

“That’s because Akihisa-bro brought so many unnecessary things to school.”

Sitting beside me and showing me a smile is Kinoshita Hideyoshi, who’s in the same class as me, Yuuji and Muttsulini. It’s already weird to hear him speak like an old man, and he has a beauty’s face on him. He really likes to make comments. Even so, I do feel that he’s the most normal person after me, since the other two are so abnormal that words can’t describe them.

“Speaking of which, Hideyoshi didn’t get anything confiscated, right?

“Of course I did, I got some costumes and props confiscated from me. Even though I told sensei that it’s for the drama club, they still got confiscated either way.”

The school has already provided some props and costumes for Hideyoshi, so Hideyoshi himself doesn’t need to bring them. If so, these are unnecessary things. However—

“There’s no need to confiscate them all anyway, he could have given us some leeway. Who expected Ironman’s brain to be so hard.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“His brain’s definitely filled with lead.”

Muttsulini and Yuuji seem to agree with me. This can’t be helped, since they got quite a few things confiscated as well.

And I actually thought that ‘we’re just having summoning practical today, so there’re no lessons; should be rather relaxing today.”

It was supposed to be relaxing, but I guess it’s better to have lessons without the search.

“Summoning practical…”

Hearing my little grumbling, Yuuji muttered to himself.

“Eh? What’s wrong, Yuuji?”

“Nothing. It’s just that I remembered that we have to take part in summoning war next year.”

For some reason, he sure seemed happy when he said this.

Speaking of summoning war, well, it’s about having a summoning battle between classes with the class facilities on the line. If we can move onto second year without any mishaps, we’ll have this summoning war system on us.

“But why must we have this summoning war system? If we want to differentiate the scores clearly, can’t we just stick grades onto everyone?”

“Well, most likely, they prefer a summoning war to tests since it can motivate students, right? As a class, the students will work hard to not drag their classmates down.”

“I see. So they intend to make us work together and improve our grades without breaking us, right?”

“Yeah, this allows the school to do what they want the most, and that’s ‘to groom students who can showcase their real potential in society’.”

“Oh~ Is that so?”

Just as the four of them were chatting away.

“Ah…really, that Yoshii actually left the cleaning work to me. Where did he go off to?”

A certain student can be heard shouting on the corridor. Is that Shimada-san?

“What the heck, Akihisa. You’re in charge of cleaning today?”

“Mm, but I left the cleaning work to Shimada-san and ran off first.”

“Hmm, according to how I see it, you two have quite the relationship.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“Ah haha, it’s not what you think it is.”

“Really. Once I catch him, I’ll tie his limbs up and throw him down the 3rd level!”

That’s a highly difficult stunt even a stuntman will be afraid of.

“Sorry, I don’t think I can protect my own life any longer. I’ll be leaving now!”

Without saying anything else, I grabbed my bag and dashed out of the corridor. I love my life.

“Ah, Yoshii! So you’re hiding here! Hold it right there!”

“I’m not going to wait! You’re going to kill me, right?”

“I’m not angry at all. Just hold on, will you!?”

That’s definitely a lie.

“These two really have rather good feelings.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

She said that she’s not angry, but she’s holding onto a rope for some reason.

<center>☆</center>

“Hoo…that was scary~”

It’s been past 30 minutes since I came running out of school, and before I knew it, I’m on a shopping street.

“Well. I don’t intend to buy anything, so I guess I’ll go back home—hm?”

Just as I intended to head home, I saw a familiar figure walk into a shop. Isn’t that Himeji-san?

“I guess it’s somewhat of a fate for us to meet here. Should I be courageous and call her…”

Though we did study in the same class during elementary school, we were separated into different classes during middle school. Before I knew it, Himeji-san seemed so distant from me. To see her in front of me after so many years, I really want to talk to her—the reason why I feel this way is most likely because of Yuuji’s words ‘She’ll erase you from her memory anyway’.

In order to turn my thoughts into action, I follow Himeji-san closely as I walked into the shop…only to find that there’re so many dolls here, it’s unbelievable. Seems like this is a doll shop that a girl will love the most—what the heck, this shop’s basically a doll shop!

“Well, let’s go back. This shop really doesn’t suit me.”

I immediately hasten my pace and walk towards the exit. Anyway, the most important thing right now is to leave this place.

“This is Hazuki’s only request of this lifetime. Please, uncle!”

“Even if you say that, I have to do business, you know…”

The moment I reached the exit, I suddenly heard this conversation. It seemed like a girl’s standing at the counter and telling the cashier something. She seems rather insistent on this. What’s going on?

I felt a bit mindful, so I turn my head to where the voice came from. As I expected, it’s a cashier uncle and a girl who looks like she’s in elementary school.

“I want to get that big Noi doll no matter what. Please, I beg you!”

“Even if you ask me like this…we’re doing business. Wouldn’t it be unfair to the other customers if I give you a little discount? We shopkeepers do have to treat all customers equally.”

“Even so, please!”

“Uuu…really can’t handle you…”

The cashier uncle looked rather troubled as he said this and scratches his face. The girl however continued to beg earnestly. Seeing such a small girl beg like this, I’ll be seen as really cruel if I’m to walk away like this…

“Hey, little girl, why do you want this doll?”

I know that I’m too nosey, but I still ended up getting involved.

Now that a 3rd party has suddenly appeared, the little girl and the uncle revealed a surprised look on their faces.

“Be, because onee-chan didn’t look too good recently. I wanted to buy the doll that she always wanted to hopefully motivate her…”

“Not looking good?”

“Most likely, because she just came back from Germany and couldn’t understand Japanese well!

Shifted houses…even if it’s within Japanese land, anyone will feel lonely when the friends and environment changes, let alone coming back to Japan.

“Even then, onee-chan took over mommy and daddy and did all the housework like sweeping and washing clothes nicely, and often play together with Hazuki…”

Seemed like it hit her sore spot as Hazuki-chan’s wide eyes start to tear up.

“Waa! Don, don’t cry! Nii-san will help you out here!”

“…Really?”

“Mm, really.”

“…Thank you, onii-chan!”

Wiping away the tears, Hazuki-chan reveals a delightful smile.

“Speaking of which, how much does this doll cost?”

The doll in Hazuki-chan’s arms is about 1m tall. If I make a rough estimate, I don’t think 5,000 yen’s going to be enough.

“Including tax, it’ll be a total of 24,800 yen.”

“Sorry, nii-san already tried, but he can’t do it.”

“Onii-chan?”

Hazuki-chan looks rather sad.

Argh! Didn’t expect one to be that expensive. Under these conditions, the declaration of surrender came out of my mouth without thinking through.

“Then how much does Hazuki-chan has?”

“I only have 10,000yen…”

So we’re missing 15,000. Including my entire fortune, there’s only 11,699 yen. We can’t even hitting the price of 24,800 yen! The most we can pay is half.

“Excuse me, can you sell this doll to us at 11,699 yen?”

“Eh, I just said before that that we’re doing a business here…”

The reply’s still the same.

“Onii-chan, this isn’t any different from before.”

Hazuki-chan whispered to my ear.

She’s right. Up till now, I’ve been doing the same thing as what Hazuki-chan’s been doing. However, things will be different from now on. I’m not an elementary school student; let’s show her how an adult (high school student) does things!

“We have only 11,699 yen in total, that’s about half the price of the doll, right?”

“Ya. That’s still not quite enough.”

“Hazuki-chan wants this doll, and uncle wants to sell this to her, but you’re unwilling to sell it to her at half price. If so, I have a great idea!”

“Hm? What is it?”

“We can rip the doll in half and sell the right side to—eh? What? Why are you two seeing me as an idiot?”

“…Are you really a high school student?”

“…Onii-chan’s an idiot!”

I, I actually got called stupid by an elementary school kid!

“I can’t give you a discount, but I can guarantee that I won’t sell this doll away for the time being. You can go back to discuss with your parents first.”

Making this conclusion, the uncle ended the conversation just like this.

“Can’t you ask your parents to buy it for you, Hazuki-chan?”

Having walked out of the shop, we came to the park to discuss our plans.

“Mommy and daddy aren’t normally at home…so they would leave the money to one-chan. If I want to buy something, onee-chan will definitely ask for a reason…”

“I see, uu~”

Wanting to do something for her beloved older sister—Hazuki-chan’s heart’s ever so glamorous, it’s way different from my family who sent me to Fumitzuki Gakuen on the excuse of ‘not wanting to waste school fees’. I must help Hazuki-chan in order to prevent her from losing this intimacy with her family.

But speaking of which, what should I do? It’ll be good if I have some more money, but my money’s about to be used it…

“Oh ya! Hazuki can get money if she sells her manga to a second-hand shop, right?”

Hazuki-chan thought of this brilliant plan as her eyes sparkle. It’s true that we can get money just like this, but I think that she can’t get so much anyway. Of course, it’s a different case altogether if I have those handheld games that were confiscated this morning—

“Hm? Oh ya, there’s this plan after all!”

“…Onii-chan, have you thought of something?”

“I can’t possibly get it back it my hands anyway. If I’m successful, we may be able to get enough money to buy the doll…”

Though I don’t think it can work…mm! It’s still worth a try though.

“Okay! Hazuki-chan, can you come back to the park tomorrow?”

“Y, yes. I can come over…”

“Then we’ll meet here tomorrow. It’s getting dark now, let’s go home.”

I waved my hands and said goodbye to Hazuki-chan. Anyway, I got to discuss it with Yuuji and the rest tomorrow.

“Ah, mm, bye bye…”

Speaking of which, did Himeji-san really enter that shop?

<center>☆</center>

“So you want to take back those confiscated items?”

The next morning, in the same classroom, I talked to the trio as per usual.

“I do feel that it’s a pity to leave those things that got confiscated yesterday, but…”

“Uu~mm…ya, but the opponent’s that Ironman. We may be designated as ‘Punishment Inspectors’ if we’re not careful…”

Yuuji and Hideyoshi lower their chin and ponder. Seems like they don’t intend to help me. This is bad, looks like I have to deal with this on my own.

“…I approve of Akihisa’s proposal.”

“Eh? Muttsulini? You’re willing to help me?”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

Great! Now at least I have someone who specializes in stealth helping me out.

“…Never mind, let’s give it a go.”

“Ah? So Yuuji’s okay with it?”

“Yeah. I just bought that MP3 recently, and I accumulated quite a debt to Ironman, so let’s settle this once and for all.”

Yuuji smirked. What an enthusiastic bad guy’s face.

“If so, I’ll help out as well. If I can get back those things, I don’t want to give up as well.”

In the end, even Hideyoshi nodded his head, and everyone decided to take part in this. As expected of the group problematic first-years.

“Right now, the most important thing is to investigate where our targets are.”

“That’s right. If we don’t even know where Ironman hid those confiscated items, we can’t possibly get them back even if we want to.”

The confiscated items may have ended up being abandoned, but they were just confiscated yesterday, so Ironman should still have them with him.

“That’s the case. Akihisa, remove the silence function of the phone.”

“Eh? Why?”

“Don’t ask too much, just do it. You want those confiscated items back, right?”

“…I’m not really sure what’s going on, but I just need to remove the silence function, right?”

“That’s right.”

The phone can’t possibly ring during lesson time, there shouldn’t be any problems, right? Let’s just follow what Yuuji told me to do.

I pull my handphone out from my pocket and took it out of silent mode.

“Oi, you people better hurry up and sit down. I’m going to start taking attendance.”

Seeing our homeroom teacher Ironman walk into the classroom, I immediately slip the handphone back into my pocket.

“Alright, let’s begin.”

Thus, our battle for the confiscated items officially begins now.

“Shimada.”

“Here.”

“Shimizu.”

“Here.”

At the usual time of taking attendance, Ironman’s coarse voice echoes clearly throughout the classroom.

“Yamaguchi.”

“Here.”

“Watanabe.”

“Here.”

—Beep beep beep.

Suddenly, a beep interrupted the class while attendance is taken. Whose phone is it? Really, do think that we have such a stupid person in class. The phone will definitely get confiscated when it rings in class.

“…Yoshii, hand over your phone.”

“…Yes.”

The problem is, this stupid person was me.

Damn it! Why must it ring at this moment!? Who called me!?

<<Missed call: Sakamoto Yuuji>>

“Yu, Yuuji, you betrayed me!”

“I’ll consficate the handphone then.”

“Ahh! Handphone! MY HANDPHONE!”

My handphone got taken away by Ironman mercilessly.

“Very good. Nobody’s came late nor skipped classes. I hope that all students will continue to keep this up.”

After taking the attendance, Ironman moves his heavy feet out of the classroom—together with my handphone.

“Very good. Part 1 of the plan is complete.”

“Yuuji! What sort of grudge do you have against me! Now my handphone got confiscated by Ironman all because of you!”

“This is a bait meant to fish out where our targets are. We just need to take them back.”

“Eh? Bait?”

“That’s right. I deliberately allowed Ironman to confiscate your handphone in order to find out where Ironman hid those items.”

“Why didn’t you tell me in the first place…”

And if possible, I hope that you can use your handphone as bait.

“…I’m back.”

“WAHH!”

Suddenly talking right behind me. You scared me~

“Oh, Muttsulini came back already. How was it?”

“…Those confiscated items are placed in the staff storage cupboard.”

“As expected of Muttsulini, erasing your own presence to tail people, that truly is your specialty. I’m impressed.”

Seems like Muttsulini went to tail Ironman and investigate where my handphone was hidden. If it’s tailing others without attracting attention, Yuuji can’t do it, and Hideyoshi doesn’t have the skills.

“…But the cupboard’s locked.”

“Okay. So where’s the key?”

“…In the rear left pocket of Ironman’s pants.”

“I see. If so, we have to snatch the ket from him.”

“Ya, but how are we going to do that?”

“No problems. I got a good idea. We’ll take action during cleaning time.”

Anyway, let's attend lessons and wait for school dismissal.

<center>☆</center>

It's finally dismissal time.

“So, what plan do you have?”

As I tried to sneak out yesterday, I was punished to sweep the entire corridor alone. Thus, I'm discussing the plan with Yuuji and the rest while twisting the mop around. These damned guys don't have any intentions of helping out in the first place.

“We'll be using that.”

Yuuji lifts his chin and points.

“A pail? What are we going to do with that?”

“We're going to use that to splash water on Ironman and make him take off his clothes.”

I see. If so, we can then take his clothes away and take the key to the cupboard,

“Mm hm~ this method is simple and easy to succeed.”

Hideyoshi's right. We can't possibly fail. Basically, there's only the last problem to this plan, and that is—whoever going to splash the water on Ironman will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.

“There's only one problem in this plan, and that's the one who's going to splash the water, 'Akihisa' will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.”

Hold on! Is it decided that I'll be the one in charge of doing this?

“However, that's not really a huge problem.”

THAT'S A HUGE PROBLEM TO ME!

“Oi, isn't that too strange? Let's settle this with rock paper scissors!”

“Ooh, look! Me and our target's already here.”

“Very good. You got to do your best, Akihisa!”

“...Do your best.”

“Eh? Hold on!”

The trio already wordlessly retreated back in the shortest time possible.

Ironman has already climbed up the stairs. If so, I can only do this!

My eyes have already captured the target, and the relative speed was estimated. The prepared weapon's in my hand, everything's okay—time to attack!

“WAAHH! I SLIPPED!”

Dragging the mop, I deliberately fell forward by letting my feet stagger and aim the pail at Ironman, who's on the stairs. GET WET!

“GUAH!”

How, how is it possible! As expected of Ironman! To be able to suddenly react in the blink of an eye and dodge the splash thanks to his superhuman senses! However—

“WHERE ARE YOU ESCAPING TO!?”

I drag the mop in my hand to where Ironman dodged to. I won't admit defeat so easily!

Phoosh, Clak cak cak.

The water from the pail drenched Ironman, and the pail rolls asie. Mission accomplished.

I pick up the pail and mop that I threw out as I remain mindful not to step on the puddle of water, saying to a stunned Ironman “Sorry, I slipped—AHH, sensei! An encyclopaedia isn't to be used as a weapon!”

“I thought I just heard you say 'Where are you escaping to', didn't I?”

“That's just a hallucination.”

“Stop trying to lie to me with such a serious look on your face. Get ready to die!”

“Sen, sensei, please don't use the edge of the encyclopaedia!”

Where are you guys now! Come save me! I'll definitely be beaten down by Ironman into a panda if this keeps up!

“Ahh, Akihisa, you really ended up doing it.”

Yuuji and the rest appeared out of nowhere. Anyway, I'm saved~

“I told you so many times 'not to splash water onto sensei'...”

“Ow, OWW! SENSEI! I SAID THAT I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE ALREADY!”

They, they didn't help out at all! These damned guys! Are they intending to sit around and watch?

“Sensei, punish Akihisa later. I guess you better change your clothes. If you don't mind, I'll lend my P.E. attire to you.”

“That's right. Sorry, then lend me that. Yoshii, stay behind and scrub the floor clean!”

Leaving these words behind, Ironman, who was drenched by me, head off to the classroom with Yuuji and the rest to change clothes.

“...So unfortunate.”

Anyway, I remained behind to clean the floor up. Besides, I have the cleaning tools in my hand.

Just as I'm working hard to wipe the water off the floor, Hideyoshi walks out of the classroom and moves towards me.

“I got the key, Akihisa.”

“Really? Then we just need to enter the staffroom and get back the confiscated items.”

“Umm, let's hurry up before Ironman realizes it.”

“Got it!”

After letting the mop lean against the wall, Hideyoshi and I quickly head towards the staffroom.

“I'm going in then.”

I took the cupboard key from Hideyoshi's hands and reach my hand out for the door.

“There’s no problem, right?”

“No need to worry. I’ll try my best to walk into the staffroom without raising too much attention and get those things back.”

I should be just an ordinary student to every teacher, except for Ironman. I should be more suited for this role as compared to Hideyoshi, who has the look of a beauty.

“Really? Then I’ll just wait here for your good news.”

“Mm, I’m going in then~ ‘cuse me~”

I open the staffroom door slightly. No problem, I’m not some irritating guy.

“Yoshii? Hurry up and get over here!”

“Why!? Why am I noticed so soon after entering the room!?”

I got caught by the Ancient Literature teacher immediately after entering the room. Why?

“I want to hear what excuse you have regarding the essay ‘translate the Tsurezuregusa[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#] into Modern Language’!”

“Ah, I did hand in my homework properly.”

“I’m asking why did you turn the Tsurezuregusa into a rap!?”

“Eh? But sensei wanted it to be translated into the modern language, and speaking of modern Japanese, isn’t it—”

“Ah, Yoshii-kun, remember to come over here after you’re done there.”

“Yoshii, that Chemistry report you handed in was too ridiculous! Come over and explain it to me later.”

Unknowingly, I got surrounded by several teachers. Well, if this is the case, forget about completing the plan, I’ll be hounded by these teachers till night! Got to find a way to get away from them!

“Excuse me…”

Just as I’m pondering on what to do, someone else entered the staffroom. Hm? Isn’t that Hideyoshi?

"Ooh, isn’t that Kinoshita? What’s wrong?”

“I, I suddenly…don’t feel too good…but the health teacher isn’t…in…”

Hideyoshi cupped his mouth. He really doesn’t look too good. Is he sick?

“Hideyoshi, are you—”

I frantically rushed towards him. At this moment, he suddenly blinked at me. I see, so he’s acting! As expected of someone from the drama club, I nearly got fooled.

“Sorry, but can I rest here—”

Before finishing, Hideyoshi collapsed onto the floor.

“Ki, Kinoshita! Are you alright?”

“Anyway, let’s take him to the sickbay!”

“You, you’re right! Sensei, please carry his legs!”

A few teachers start to create quite the ruckus. After that, everyone in the staffroom left to accompany Hideyoshi to the sick bay. Brilliantly done, Hideyoshi!

“Let’s use this opportunity to get back those confiscated items. Let me see, Ironman…no wait, it’s Nishimura. Nishimura’s…”

I checked the nametag on the cupboards which are according to order. Oh, found it. It’s this one.

“…Speaking of which, I somehow imagined that bugs will crawl out of Ironman’s cupboard.”

Though I’m a bit fearful, I have no time to hesitate. I pull out the key Hideyoshi handed to me and pull the door handle down, opening the metal cupboard effortlessly.

“Oh, it’s unexpectedly clean…”

The cupboard’s arranged rather neatly, and the bag of confiscated goods are placed in an obvious place.

“Let’s get out of here before someone notices—hm?”

Just as I was about to lock the cupboard up and run away, I noticed a pile of old books tied up in raffia strings. Should be meant for throwing away.

“Uu~hm…since he’s going to throw it, I might as well take it. Maybe I can get some money as well.”

After grabbing the books with both hands, I immediately dashed out of the staffroom.

“Okay! At least we achieved our goal!”

After what happened just now, I brought the spoils—the bag of confiscated items back to Yuuji, only taking away my own stuff and the pile of old books. I then took them over to a second-hand shop to exchange these spoils for cash.

My handheld games and gaming software garnered a price lower than what I expected, while that pile of books got quite the price; what a nice mistake in estimation. I really got to thank Ironman for this.

“Let me see, is that girl here~”

“Ah! Onii-chan! You're here!”

Hazuki-chan immediately came running over to me the moment I approached the park. She really looked like a cute puppy, and that even warms my heart. Maybe it's because I'm often surrounded by idiots, Ironman and a violent girl...

“Mm, because we arranged to meet each other. Oh yeah, where did you get that doll from?”

Looking closely, Hazuki-chan's hugging something similar to the Noi doll that she wanted to buy (is that what it's called?). It looks as if it was sewn by hand.

“There was a pretty onee-chan who came over and said to me 'If that onii-chan couldn't succeed, then give this to your sister!' and handed it over to me!”

“?”
“And she also said 'If that onii-chan managed to buy the doll, i'll give this doll to you.'.”

The kid's lac of order in her speech confused me.

Erm, let me straighten Hazuki-chan's words out—

—A pretty onee-chan came to Hazuki-chan today.

—And then, she handed this handmade doll over to Hazuki-chan

—This pretty onee-chan even said that if I couldn't do it, she'll give this doll to Hazuki-chan's sister as a gift.

—But if I succeeded, this doll will go to Hazuki-chan.

—So that's how it is.

“Mmm, is that so? Then this doll will go to hazuki-chan.”

“Eh? Really?”

“Yeah. And this doll will go to Hazuki-chan's sister.”

I hand over the large doll in my hand over to Hazuki-chan. It should be tough for her petite body to carry such a large doll, but she still received it delightedly.

“This is great! Thank you, onii-chan!”

“No problems. It'll be great if your sister can cheer up.”

I patted her head. Hazuki-chan seems to enjoy it as she slowly closes her eyes.

“Uu~ Ah, that's right! Onii-chan, can you lend me your ear?”

“Eh? What is it? Are you going to say a secret to me or something?”

“don't ask, just lend me your ear.”

Is she about to thank me? I'm really touched. One can't become a proper adult if the person can't even say 'thank you' or 'sorry'.

“Okay, what is it?”

I bent over to match her height, but unexpectedly—

“Thank you, onii-chan♪”

Whoosh! A cute sensation passes my face. Eh? This...don't tell me this is...

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 043.jpg|thumb]]

“Wha, wha, wha...”

“Onii-chan may be an idiot, but he's so gentle! Hazuki-cahn loves you! When I grow up, I'll let you become my husband!”

Without waiting for me to reply, Hazuki-chan skips out of the park.

Re, recently, these elementary school students are...

I touched my face with my hand, seemingly wanting to wipe away the soft sensation that's left on the face. Even without looking at the mirror, I know my face is red. How, how embarrassing...she's just an elementary school kid...

“Hoo...time for me to go back as well...”

After lifting my bag up and slinging it over my back, I head off towards the exit of the park. While exiting, I see a familiar figure yesterday. That person is—

“Excuse me...are you Himeji-san?”

“Ah, yes, what is it—YO, YOSHII-KUN!”

So it's Himeji-san. It sure is hard to find another pretty girl. I can't possibly be mistaken.

“Sorry, I seemed to have scared you.”

“No, no worries. I was just dazed...”

Our conversation got interrupted just like that. This, this is really awkward...what should I say to a friend who I haven't met for a long time?

“Erm, that...it's really a coincidence that we met here. Did you just finish class? But you look rather tired here, are you?”

“Yes,because I stayed up all night...”

“Hei~so Himeji-san would also stay up.”

The impression she gives is that she lives her life normally, but it's unexpected that she would stay up.

“That's not it, I just stayed up last night, because I got something I have to do no matter what...”

She inadvertently yawned as she continued to talk. Himeji-san sure is cute when she lets out some tears due to sleepiness.

“Then, I'll be going off in this direction, goodbye.”

"Ah, mm, byebye.”

I waved my hand to Himeji-san, who bowed to me courteously.

While walking home, I just realized—oh ya, why did Himeji-san appear in such a place?

<center>☆</center>

“...There was a case of theft in the staffroom room.”

The next morning, during self-study period, Ironman suddenly mentioned this. He's definitely referring to the bag of confiscated items that we got yesterday.

“Such a tragedy worth being angry over, don't you think so, Yoshii?”

He actually threw this question at me. As expected of Ironman, he must have realized that I was the perpetrator, but who will follow you obediently?

“Yeah, sure is worth sighing over.”

I naturally replied with these few words. No problems, I got everything under control.

“Really? Speaking of which, that culprit even took sensei's books.”

Hm? Books? Is he referring to that bundle of books? Wasn't he going to throw them away?

“And that culprit actually had the guts to use his own identity to sell my books to a second-hand shop.”

“Is that so, he sure has guts.”

“Yeah, hahahaha!”

“Ahhahaha...”

Ironman and I started laughing with all enthusiasm. Really, we're laughing with all sorts of happiness—at least it looked that way if not for those eyes.

“YOSHII! GET READY TO DIE!!!”

“So, sorry! Who knew that it was sensei's collection, I didn't—”

“Are you saying that you didn't even think of it?”

“No, I did think about it, but then I thought 'since its Ironman's, it doesn't matter~'! OW! OUCH! SENSEI! MY SKULLCAP GOT SMASHED IN BY YOU!”

“So you idiot has the highest suspicion. Looks like I have to be even more careful and watch you.”

“Sensei! I'm feeling that I've been watched by you all this time, there's no way for you to watch me further!”

“No, there still is, right? I got a really precious title of honor that's suitable for you—“

“Eh, this is...”

“Everyone at the staff meeting this morning have all agreed, so accept this. This is a present that sensei's handing you.”

From who knows when, Ironman suddenly has a piece of paper in his hand. This plain white paper has only a single line on it.

—Yoshii Akihisa.

The above mentioned has been designed as the 'Punishment Inspector' of Fumitzuki Gakuen.

<center>☆</center>

“Onee-chan!”

Hm? Hazuki, what's up?”

“Well, this is for onee-chan!”

“Eh? Isn't this the Noi doll that I always wanted? How did you...”

“Because onee-chan looked so lethargic. Hazuki prepared it for onee-chan to cheer onee-chan up!”

“Hazuki...really, you...thank you, onee-chan's really happy!”

“Schoolwork may be tough, but you must work hard, Minami nee-chan!”

“Hm, I'll do my best! I'll feel like I lost if I continue to mess around like this. And also...”

“And also what?”

“I'm mindful of someone in school.”

“Eh? Onee-chan's mindful of someone? Who is it? How is that person like?”

“Well~as repayment of the Noi doll, I'll only say this to Hazuki. That person is in the same class as me, and he's one huge idiot~”

<noinclude>
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| Back to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Novel Illustrations|Novel Illustrations]]
| Return to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Fumizuki News|Fumizuki News (An interview with Yoshii Akihisa from Class 2-F)]]
|-
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</noinclude>

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3.5 Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～

2011-04-20T15:06:40Z

Caolsei:

==Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～==

'''Please fill in the correct name of the historical person in the blank below.'''

The person who instituted the rakuichi rakuza and abolished monopolies to promote business and economic growth is ______.

'''Himeji Mizuki’s answer:'''

“Oda Nobunaga”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Correct answer.

'''Shimada Minami’s answer:'''

“Chonmage”[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#]

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Gotten used to Japan already? Sensei’s a bit worried on seeing your answer.

'''Yoshii Akihisa’s answer:'''

“Nobu”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

You’re very familiar with him, aren't you?

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 007.jpg|thumb]]

After we shifted here, onee-chan seemed to be a lot more lethargic.

Is it because she’s being bullied at school? Or is it that there’s someone she finds irritating?

But then again, every time onee-chan talked about those classmates, it sounded really interesting. Onee-chan also seemed like she really likes them…

If so, why’s onee-chan so lethargic?

Is it because of school work? Onee-chan did say before the she has some difficulty.

I hope the onee-chan can recover soon.

It’s going to be onee-chan’s birthday, would onee-chan be motivated if I give her a huge plushie? Onee-chan always loved dolls after all.

Mm, let’s do that! I’ll buy a big big Noi doll for onee-chan to cheer her up!

…I wonder if I have enough pocket money?

<center>☆</center>

“EVERYONE FREEZE! PUT YOUR BAGS ON THE TABLE AND LET ME SEE WHAT YOU BROUGHT TO SCHOOL!”

Just right after morning self-study period started, the homeroom teacher in charge of our class, Iron—I’ll try that again, Nishimura-sensei, who’s in charge of our class, suddenly declared this without warning.

Argh! Not good! I brought nothing that’s related to attending lessons at all!

—Should I carry my bag and run away at the fastest speed I can?

For that moment, that idea appeared in my mind.

“Let me tell you beforehand, don’t ever think of running away!”

It’s a difficult task to run away from this homeroom teacher. Besides, this guy’s a brawny teacher with the moniker ‘ironman’. No matter how we try to run, he’ll use this body that’s trained for an ‘Ironman’ triathlon to pursue us relentlessly.

“Alright, I’m going to start checking. If there’s anything unrelated to attending lessons, I will confiscate them without leaving anything.”

Starting from the first row near the corridor, Ironman startst to check the contents of all the bags one by one and confiscate the poker cards and magazines that each person brought.

“Sakamoto, let me see what’s inside your pocket.”

Among us, one of the students has not only his bag, even his pockets are to be checked.

“…Damn it.”

Sakamoto Yuuji makes a sound in agony—he’s my best worst friend.

However, he still obediently rummages through his pocket and pulls out an MP3.

“As expected. I’ll be confiscating this.”

After saying this, Ironman puts Yuuji’s MP3 into his confiscation pouch. Yuuji, who never expected his pocket to be search through, glares at Ironman defiantly.

(This is a disaster, isn’t it, Yuuji?)

I whispered to Yuuji’s ear.

(Really a disaster. Would they normally check pockets? I’m the only one who got my pockets checked!)

(Can’t be helped. Who asked Yuuji to be such a bad person?)

(…Go to hell!)

Looking closely, it seems like Ironman’s method of checking will change according to the student. He’ll only ask the well-behaved students to open their bags and briefly look through their bags once. But for the ill-behaved students, he’ll check thoroughly, even including the inside bags of the bag.

“You’re next, Yoshii Akihisa.”

“Ah, yes.”

Ironman arrives in front of me. Even though I don’t think that he’ll ask me to rummage through my pockets like Yuuji—

“Take off your uniform first, and change into your P.E. attire.”

“Eh? Aren’t you being too wary?”

This level of trust far exceeds what I imagined.

“Well…Nishimura-sensei, for me to change in front of the girls, it’s a bit…”

“That won’t do. you may be hiding some prohibited item in your trousers, so take them out.”

“How can you do this! Even if it’s me, I can’t possibly go to that extent! You should at least trust me—”

Just as I agitatedly approached sensei, ‘CLACK!’, something seemed to drop out from the leg of my trousers.

“Oi, Akihisa, your NDS dropped out.”

I received the handheld gaming console that Yuuji nicely helped me picked up, and after saying thanks, I again face sensei.

“Sensei, believe in me, will you?”

“Forget about wearing P.E. attire.”

How, how is this possible! He’s actually even more wary now!

“You actually brought gaming consoles, manga, light novels, DVD…what one earth are you treating school as?”

My precious stuff are confiscated away, one by one. Speaking of which, why did he do a spot-check when I brought so many things out? The value of those confiscated items may total up to be tens of thousands yen.

“Are these all? I said before, the school is a place for you to learn knowledge, you are not allowed to bring anything unrelated to school.”

After searching, Ironman carried the confiscated items back to the podium. I won’t be able to see my precious again…

“Alright, since you people brought all these along, morning self-study will be cancelled. The first lesson will be ‘summoning practical’, all students are to immediately rush over to the gym.”

After saying this, Ironman carries all the confiscated items and leaves the classroom.

<center>☆</center>

“—Summon!”

Hearing the summoning call echo throughout the gym, I say to Yuuji, who’s beside me.

“…It’s only early morning and we’re already so unlucky.”

“Yeah, that MP3 I bought last month actually got confiscated, damn it.”

“Wah, that’s not too long ago.”

“That one was expensive, you know!”

Yuuji’s wild looking face shrivels with sadness as he continues to complain. I can understand~~this feeling.”

“Akihisa, you got your handheld games confiscated as well, right? There’s quite a few of them.”

“Mm…the total value should be over 30,000 yen.”

Handheld games, game software, DVDs and CDs; totaling up the value of all the confiscated items, the number 1 this time should be either me or Muttsulini. How unlucky…”

“Next, Himeji Mizuki, please step forward.”

“Ye, yes.”

“Oh, it’s Himeji now? Rare for her to wear a P.E. attire. Muttsulini, is it really alright not to take photos of her?”

“…My camera got confiscated.”

“I see, quite the pity. We’re in different classes, so it’s rare to see Himeji-san in a P.E. attire.”

“There’s only this one summoning practical.”

“…(Lowers head dejectedly).”

Muttsulini’s so depressed that he can’t even lift his head up. Sigh, this can’t be helped anyway.

Silky and smooth long hair, and cute and innocent look, an ample chest that seems to be self-aware and supports the uniform; Even if it’s not Muttsulini, any guy will want to take a photo of her pretty figure; I know that I definitely want to.

“Is, is this how you do it? Summon!”

Himeji-san doesn’t really seem confident as she mutters. A geometrical magic array appears beside her feet, and Himeji-san’s summoned beast appears in front of everyone.

“As expect of Himeji, her summoned beast sure looks impressive…”

“Yeah, and cute too.”

Himeji-san’s summoned beast looks really cute. Since a summoned beast is basically formed from the caster’s appearance, and since the caster’s already so cute looking, there’s no need to emphasize it further.

But speaking of which, what makes her summoned beast so impressive—

“Most likely, nobody else will be able to wield such a terrifyingly huge sword.”

“Yeah, only Himeji-san is able to do that.”

Her summoned beast is wielding a Western longsword that’s several times longer than her height, and she’s lifting it effortlessly. Anyone can tell that this summoned beast isn’t to be underestimated.

Class C, Himeji Mizuki, Combined subjects 3943 points.

Vs

Class C, Furukawa Ayumi, Combined subjects 1264 points.

The reference points appear in front of us. These are the results of the previous mid-term exams.

“I see, so that’s why she’s so strong.”

“It’s almost 4000 points. Himeji-san sure is smart.”

Mmm…holed up in a corner, we continue to nod our heads away.

The strength of a summoned beast is equivalent to the points that the owner gets. Since the test summoning system totals up the marks, basically, the higher amount of points a person gets, the stronger the summoned beast will be.

“Speaking of which, don’t Akihisa and Himeji know each other?”

“Mm~ she was my grade school classmate…but we haven’t spoken to each other for years. She should have forgotten about me, right?”

We’re in different classes right now, separated for a long time. If there’s a chance, I’ll definitely want to talk to her, but there’s no real chance for me to talk to any girl from another class. If I’m to go to her class and immediately say “Himeji-san, I got something to say to you”, this will look like a confession no matter what.

“I see, you’ll most likely be streamed into different classes next year. I can you can be erased from Hiemji’s memory.”

“Next year? Are you talking about the streaming exam?”

“Yeah, you definitely won’t be able to be in the same class as her anyway.”

“Now that you mentioned it, that’s right…”

After we entered school, we were streamed into different classes like other schools. But next year, things will be different. We’ll be sorted according to our grades. Though Himeji-san is in class C, when we become second-years, she’ll definitely be sorted into class A with those top grades of hers. If so, me and Yuuji will definitely be unable to be classmates with her since we’re just straddling about in class D anyway.

“I’ll be forgotten by her…this sure feels rather lonely…”

“Yeah, there’s no benefit for her to remember you anyway.”

“How can you say that!”

Just as we’re blankly seeing other classes battle it out and talking away—

“Next! Yoshii Akihisa and Shimada Minami!”

Ironman—let me repeat that again, this is the voice of our homeroom teacher, Nishimura-sensei.

Recovering myself, I find that those before me who were waiting to practice their summoning are all back.

“I’m going then.”

“Go then. You’re a ‘punishment inspector’ candidate anyway, go learn how to control a summoned beast properly.”

“…I say, I’m different from you Yuuji. I’m not some problematic kid!”

I rolled my eyes back at Yuuji. Really, what about being a ‘punishment inspector’? That’s really rude. Aren’t they saying that I’m a problematic student? Why is he calling me this when it’s basically the equivalent of being an idiot?

“Hurry up, Yoshii!!”

“Alright~”

Hearing Ironman roar at me, I hastily increase my pace.

Paying attention, the training partner has already finished her summoning.

“…”

The person stares at the summoned beast in front of her in shock. This girl with an energetic-looking ponytail and attractive long legs is my classmate, Shimada-san. At this moment, she reveals a slight melancholic look that doesn’t fit her. What happened? Why’s she looking so depressed and lethargic? Is her summoned beast even weak and useless than what she thought would be?”

“What’s wrong, Shimada-san? Are you shocked that your summoned beast is so weak?”

After saying this, I see that she seems to be healed by my gentleness. The grey clouds above her are gone, now replaced with a look of delight.

“Ah, so Yoshii’s the opponent. How delightful.”

Shimada-san slightly blushes. Seeing her so happy, I felt happy as well—oh my, to reveal her feelings to me in front of everyone like this, this kid’s really troublesome.”

“Because it’s great to beat up Yoshii.”

…This kid’s really troublesome!

“Shimada-san, the target’s the summoned beast, not us.”

I’m a little worried, so I confirmed the rules with her again. This is the summoning practical that’s meant for the summoning battles next year, so no matter what, this should be a battle between summoned beasts.

“You’re right, we won’t be fighting each other.”

Shimada-san immediately nodded her head in agreement. Great, seems like she understood.

“Since I’ll be the one dishing out the beatdown anyway.”

SEEMS LIKE SHE DIDN’T UNDERSTAND AT ALL!

“That, sensei, what Shimada-san did just now was an act of violence. If you have the time to check our belongings, you should do something about this case of school violence, right?”

“…Shimada, even if the opponent’s Yoshii, violence is bad.”

“But sensei…”

No buts. A no is a no, you understand?”

“…Yes.”

“Really…so you really understand? If so—”

Ironman suddenly reveals a smirk and says,

“—I’ll give you a special discount this time.”

“Eh? Aren’t those words really weird?”

Am I thinking too much? It seemed like a teacher just allowed a case of school violence!

“I’ll do my best!”

“Right, so you must work hard.”

“Ah haha, sensei, Shimada-san, you two are really stupid. Do you think that you two can beat me so easily? If so, I’m going to counter and beat you two—I’M SORRY, IT’S MY FAULT, PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!”

It’s useless even if I apologised.

Don’t tell me…that those cautious words of mine caused this disaster?

<center>☆</center>

“Ho…ever since morning inspection, it’s been one disaster after another today…”

After a day’s worth of lessons, it’s dismissal time. I’m chatting away with those guys who I usually talk to.

“That’s because Akihisa-bro brought so many unnecessary things to school.”

Sitting beside me and showing me a smile is Kinoshita Hideyoshi, who’s in the same class as me, Yuuji and Muttsulini. It’s already weird to hear him speak like an old man, and he has a beauty’s face on him. He really likes to make comments. Even so, I do feel that he’s the most normal person after me, since the other two are so abnormal that words can’t describe them.

“Speaking of which, Hideyoshi didn’t get anything confiscated, right?

“Of course I did, I got some costumes and props confiscated from me. Even though I told sensei that it’s for the drama club, they still got confiscated either way.”

The school has already provided some props and costumes for Hideyoshi, so Hideyoshi himself doesn’t need to bring them. If so, these are unnecessary things. However—

“There’s no need to confiscate them all anyway, he could have given us some leeway. Who expected Ironman’s brain to be so hard.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“His brain’s definitely filled with lead.”

Muttsulini and Yuuji seem to agree with me. This can’t be helped, since they got quite a few things confiscated as well.

And I actually thought that ‘we’re just having summoning practical today, so there’re no lessons; should be rather relaxing today.”

It was supposed to be relaxing, but I guess it’s better to have lessons without the search.

“Summoning practical…”

Hearing my little grumbling, Yuuji muttered to himself.

“Eh? What’s wrong, Yuuji?”

“Nothing. It’s just that I remembered that we have to take part in summoning war next year.”

For some reason, he sure seemed happy when he said this.

Speaking of summoning war, well, it’s about having a summoning battle between classes with the class facilities on the line. If we can move onto second year without any mishaps, we’ll have this summoning war system on us.

“But why must we have this summoning war system? If we want to differentiate the scores clearly, can’t we just stick grades onto everyone?”

“Well, most likely, they prefer a summoning war to tests since it can motivate students, right? As a class, the students will work hard to not drag their classmates down.”

“I see. So they intend to make us work together and improve our grades without breaking us, right?”

“Yeah, this allows the school to do what they want the most, and that’s ‘to groom students who can showcase their real potential in society’.”

“Oh~ Is that so?”

Just as the four of them were chatting away.

“Ah…really, that Yoshii actually left the cleaning work to me. Where did he go off to?”

A certain student can be heard shouting on the corridor. Is that Shimada-san?

“What the heck, Akihisa. You’re in charge of cleaning today?”

“Mm, but I left the cleaning work to Shimada-san and ran off first.”

“Hmm, according to how I see it, you two have quite the relationship.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“Ah haha, it’s not what you think it is.”

“Really. Once I catch him, I’ll tie his limbs up and throw him down the 3rd level!”

That’s a highly difficult stunt even a stuntman will be afraid of.

“Sorry, I don’t think I can protect my own life any longer. I’ll be leaving now!”

Without saying anything else, I grabbed my bag and dashed out of the corridor. I love my life.

“Ah, Yoshii! So you’re hiding here! Hold it right there!”

“I’m not going to wait! You’re going to kill me, right?”

“I’m not angry at all. Just hold on, will you!?”

That’s definitely a lie.

“These two really have rather good feelings.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

She said that she’s not angry, but she’s holding onto a rope for some reason.

<center>☆</center>

“Hoo…that was scary~”

It’s been past 30 minutes since I came running out of school, and before I knew it, I’m on a shopping street.

“Well. I don’t intend to buy anything, so I guess I’ll go back home—hm?”

Just as I intended to head home, I saw a familiar figure walk into a shop. Isn’t that Himeji-san?

“I guess it’s somewhat of a fate for us to meet here. Should I be courageous and call her…”

Though we did study in the same class during elementary school, we were separated into different classes during middle school. Before I knew it, Himeji-san seemed so distant from me. To see her in front of me after so many years, I really want to talk to her—the reason why I feel this way is most likely because of Yuuji’s words ‘She’ll erase you from her memory anyway’.

In order to turn my thoughts into action, I follow Himeji-san closely as I walked into the shop…only to find that there’re so many dolls here, it’s unbelievable. Seems like this is a doll shop that a girl will love the most—what the heck, this shop’s basically a doll shop!

“Well, let’s go back. This shop really doesn’t suit me.”

I immediately hasten my pace and walk towards the exit. Anyway, the most important thing right now is to leave this place.

“This is Hazuki’s only request of this lifetime. Please, uncle!”

“Even if you say that, I have to do business, you know…”

The moment I reached the exit, I suddenly heard this conversation. It seemed like a girl’s standing at the counter and telling the cashier something. She seems rather insistent on this. What’s going on?

I felt a bit mindful, so I turn my head to where the voice came from. As I expected, it’s a cashier uncle and a girl who looks like she’s in elementary school.

“I want to get that big Noi doll no matter what. Please, I beg you!”

“Even if you ask me like this…we’re doing business. Wouldn’t it be unfair to the other customers if I give you a little discount? We shopkeepers do have to treat all customers equally.”

“Even so, please!”

“Uuu…really can’t handle you…”

The cashier uncle looked rather troubled as he said this and scratches his face. The girl however continued to beg earnestly. Seeing such a small girl beg like this, I’ll be seen as really cruel if I’m to walk away like this…

“Hey, little girl, why do you want this doll?”

I know that I’m too nosey, but I still ended up getting involved.

Now that a 3rd party has suddenly appeared, the little girl and the uncle revealed a surprised look on their faces.

“Be, because onee-chan didn’t look too good recently. I wanted to buy the doll that she always wanted to hopefully motivate her…”

“Not looking good?”

“Most likely, because she just came back from Germany and couldn’t understand Japanese well!

Shifted houses…even if it’s within Japanese land, anyone will feel lonely when the friends and environment changes, let alone coming back to Japan.

“Even then, onee-chan took over mommy and daddy and did all the housework like sweeping and washing clothes nicely, and often play together with Hazuki…”

Seemed like it hit her sore spot as Hazuki-chan’s wide eyes start to tear up.

“Waa! Don, don’t cry! Nii-san will help you out here!”

“…Really?”

“Mm, really.”

“…Thank you, onii-chan!”

Wiping away the tears, Hazuki-chan reveals a delightful smile.

“Speaking of which, how much does this doll cost?”

The doll in Hazuki-chan’s arms is about 1m tall. If I make a rough estimate, I don’t think 5,000 yen’s going to be enough.

“Including tax, it’ll be a total of 24,800 yen.”

“Sorry, nii-san already tried, but he can’t do it.”

“Onii-chan?”

Hazuki-chan looks rather sad.

Argh! Didn’t expect one to be that expensive. Under these conditions, the declaration of surrender came out of my mouth without thinking through.

“Then how much does Hazuki-chan has?”

“I only have 10,000yen…”

So we’re missing 15,000. Including my entire fortune, there’s only 11,699 yen. We can’t even hitting the price of 24,800 yen! The most we can pay is half.

“Excuse me, can you sell this doll to us at 11,699 yen?”

“Eh, I just said before that that we’re doing a business here…”

The reply’s still the same.

“Onii-chan, this isn’t any different from before.”

Hazuki-chan whispered to my ear.

She’s right. Up till now, I’ve been doing the same thing as what Hazuki-chan’s been doing. However, things will be different from now on. I’m not an elementary school student; let’s show her how an adult (high school student) does things!

“We have only 11,699 yen in total, that’s about half the price of the doll, right?”

“Ya. That’s still not quite enough.”

“Hazuki-chan wants this doll, and uncle wants to sell this to her, but you’re unwilling to sell it to her at half price. If so, I have a great idea!”

“Hm? What is it?”

“We can rip the doll in half and sell the right side to—eh? What? Why are you two seeing me as an idiot?”

“…Are you really a high school student?”

“…Onii-chan’s an idiot!”

I, I actually got called stupid by an elementary school kid!

“I can’t give you a discount, but I can guarantee that I won’t sell this doll away for the time being. You can go back to discuss with your parents first.”

Making this conclusion, the uncle ended the conversation just like this.

“Can’t you ask your parents to buy it for you, Hazuki-chan?”

Having walked out of the shop, we came to the park to discuss our plans.

“Mommy and daddy aren’t normally at home…so they would leave the money to one-chan. If I want to buy something, onee-chan will definitely ask for a reason…”

“I see, uu~”

Wanting to do something for her beloved older sister—Hazuki-chan’s heart’s ever so glamorous, it’s way different from my family who sent me to Fumitzuki Gakuen on the excuse of ‘not wanting to waste school fees’. I must help Hazuki-chan in order to prevent her from losing this intimacy with her family.

But speaking of which, what should I do? It’ll be good if I have some more money, but my money’s about to be used it…

“Oh ya! Hazuki can get money if she sells her manga to a second-hand shop, right?”

Hazuki-chan thought of this brilliant plan as her eyes sparkle. It’s true that we can get money just like this, but I think that she can’t get so much anyway. Of course, it’s a different case altogether if I have those handheld games that were confiscated this morning—

“Hm? Oh ya, there’s this plan after all!”

“…Onii-chan, have you thought of something?”

“I can’t possibly get it back it my hands anyway. If I’m successful, we may be able to get enough money to buy the doll…”

Though I don’t think it can work…mm! It’s still worth a try though.

“Okay! Hazuki-chan, can you come back to the park tomorrow?”

“Y, yes. I can come over…”

“Then we’ll meet here tomorrow. It’s getting dark now, let’s go home.”

I waved my hands and said goodbye to Hazuki-chan. Anyway, I got to discuss it with Yuuji and the rest tomorrow.

“Ah, mm, bye bye…”

Speaking of which, did Himeji-san really enter that shop?

<center>☆</center>

“So you want to take back those confiscated items?”

The next morning, in the same classroom, I talked to the trio as per usual.

“I do feel that it’s a pity to leave those things that got confiscated yesterday, but…”

“Uu~mm…ya, but the opponent’s that Ironman. We may be designated as ‘Punishment Inspectors’ if we’re not careful…”

Yuuji and Hideyoshi lower their chin and ponder. Seems like they don’t intend to help me. This is bad, looks like I have to deal with this on my own.

“…I approve of Akihisa’s proposal.”

“Eh? Muttsulini? You’re willing to help me?”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

Great! Now at least I have someone who specializes in stealth helping me out.

“…Never mind, let’s give it a go.”

“Ah? So Yuuji’s okay with it?”

“Yeah. I just bought that MP3 recently, and I accumulated quite a debt to Ironman, so let’s settle this once and for all.”

Yuuji smirked. What an enthusiastic bad guy’s face.

“If so, I’ll help out as well. If I can get back those things, I don’t want to give up as well.”

In the end, even Hideyoshi nodded his head, and everyone decided to take part in this. As expected of the group problematic first-years.

“Right now, the most important thing is to investigate where our targets are.”

“That’s right. If we don’t even know where Ironman hid those confiscated items, we can’t possibly get them back even if we want to.”

The confiscated items may have ended up being abandoned, but they were just confiscated yesterday, so Ironman should still have them with him.

“That’s the case. Akihisa, remove the silence function of the phone.”

“Eh? Why?”

“Don’t ask too much, just do it. You want those confiscated items back, right?”

“…I’m not really sure what’s going on, but I just need to remove the silence function, right?”

“That’s right.”

The phone can’t possibly ring during lesson time, there shouldn’t be any problems, right? Let’s just follow what Yuuji told me to do.

I pull my handphone out from my pocket and took it out of silent mode.

“Oi, you people better hurry up and sit down. I’m going to start taking attendance.”

Seeing our homeroom teacher Ironman walk into the classroom, I immediately slip the handphone back into my pocket.

“Alright, let’s begin.”

Thus, our battle for the confiscated items officially begins now.

“Shimada.”

“Here.”

“Shimizu.”

“Here.”

At the usual time of taking attendance, Ironman’s coarse voice echoes clearly throughout the classroom.

“Yamaguchi.”

“Here.”

“Watanabe.”

“Here.”

—Beep beep beep.

Suddenly, a beep interrupted the class while attendance is taken. Whose phone is it? Really, do think that we have such a stupid person in class. The phone will definitely get confiscated when it rings in class.

“…Yoshii, hand over your phone.”

“…Yes.”

The problem is, this stupid person was me.

Damn it! Why must it ring at this moment!? Who called me!?

<<Missed call: Sakamoto Yuuji>>

“Yu, Yuuji, you betrayed me!”

“I’ll consficate the handphone then.”

“Ahh! Handphone! MY HANDPHONE!”

My handphone got taken away by Ironman mercilessly.

“Very good. Nobody’s came late nor skipped classes. I hope that all students will continue to keep this up.”

After taking the attendance, Ironman moves his heavy feet out of the classroom—together with my handphone.

“Very good. Part 1 of the plan is complete.”

“Yuuji! What sort of grudge do you have against me! Now my handphone got confiscated by Ironman all because of you!”

“This is a bait meant to fish out where our targets are. We just need to take them back.”

“Eh? Bait?”

“That’s right. I deliberately allowed Ironman to confiscate your handphone in order to find out where Ironman hid those items.”

“Why didn’t you tell me in the first place…”

And if possible, I hope that you can use your handphone as bait.

“…I’m back.”

“WAHH!”

Suddenly talking right behind me. You scared me~

“Oh, Muttsulini came back already. How was it?”

“…Those confiscated items are placed in the staff storage cupboard.”

“As expected of Muttsulini, erasing your own presence to tail people, that truly is your specialty. I’m impressed.”

Seems like Muttsulini went to tail Ironman and investigate where my handphone was hidden. If it’s tailing others without attracting attention, Yuuji can’t do it, and Hideyoshi doesn’t have the skills.

“…But the cupboard’s locked.”

“Okay. So where’s the key?”

“…In the rear left pocket of Ironman’s pants.”

“I see. If so, we have to snatch the ket from him.”

“Ya, but how are we going to do that?”

“No problems. I got a good idea. We’ll take action during cleaning time.”

Anyway, let's attend lessons and wait for school dismissal.

<center>☆</center>

It's finally dismissal time.

“So, what plan do you have?”

As I tried to sneak out yesterday, I was punished to sweep the entire corridor alone. Thus, I'm discussing the plan with Yuuji and the rest while twisting the mop around. These damned guys don't have any intentions of helping out in the first place.

“We'll be using that.”

Yuuji lifts his chin and points.

“A pail? What are we going to do with that?”

“We're going to use that to splash water on Ironman and make him take off his clothes.”

I see. If so, we can then take his clothes away and take the key to the cupboard,

“Mm hm~ this method is simple and easy to succeed.”

Hideyoshi's right. We can't possibly fail. Basically, there's only the last problem to this plan, and that is—whoever going to splash the water on Ironman will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.

“There's only one problem in this plan, and that's the one who's going to splash the water, 'Akihisa' will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.”

Hold on! Is it decided that I'll be the one in charge of doing this?

“However, that's not really a huge problem.”

THAT'S A HUGE PROBLEM TO ME!

“Oi, isn't that too strange? Let's settle this with rock paper scissors!”

“Ooh, look! Me and our target's already here.”

“Very good. You got to do your best, Akihisa!”

“...Do your best.”

“Eh? Hold on!”

The trio already wordlessly retreated back in the shortest time possible.

Ironman has already climbed up the stairs. If so, I can only do this!

My eyes have already captured the target, and the relative speed was estimated. The prepared weapon's in my hand, everything's okay—time to attack!

“WAAHH! I SLIPPED!”

Dragging the mop, I deliberately fell forward by letting my feet stagger and aim the pail at Ironman, who's on the stairs. GET WET!

“GUAH!”

How, how is it possible! As expected of Ironman! To be able to suddenly react in the blink of an eye and dodge the splash thanks to his superhuman senses! However—

“WHERE ARE YOU ESCAPING TO!?”

I drag the mop in my hand to where Ironman dodged to. I won't admit defeat so easily!

Phoosh, Clak cak cak.

The water from the pail drenched Ironman, and the pail rolls asie. Mission accomplished.

I pick up the pail and mop that I threw out as I remain mindful not to step on the puddle of water, saying to a stunned Ironman “Sorry, I slipped—AHH, sensei! An encyclopaedia isn't to be used as a weapon!”

“I thought I just heard you say 'Where are you escaping to', didn't I?”

“That's just a hallucination.”

“Stop trying to lie to me with such a serious look on your face. Get ready to die!”

“Sen, sensei, please don't use the edge of the encyclopaedia!”

Where are you guys now! Come save me! I'll definitely be beaten down by Ironman into a panda if this keeps up!

“Ahh, Akihisa, you really ended up doing it.”

Yuuji and the rest appeared out of nowhere. Anyway, I'm saved~

“I told you so many times 'not to splash water onto sensei'...”

“Ow, OWW! SENSEI! I SAID THAT I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE ALREADY!”

They, they didn't help out at all! These damned guys! Are they intending to sit around and watch?

“Sensei, punish Akihisa later. I guess you better change your clothes. If you don't mind, I'll lend my P.E. attire to you.”

“That's right. Sorry, then lend me that. Yoshii, stay behind and scrub the floor clean!”

Leaving these words behind, Ironman, who was drenched by me, head off to the classroom with Yuuji and the rest to change clothes.

“...So unfortunate.”

Anyway, I remained behind to clean the floor up. Besides, I have the cleaning tools in my hand.

Just as I'm working hard to wipe the water off the floor, Hideyoshi walks out of the classroom and moves towards me.

“I got the key, Akihisa.”

“Really? Then we just need to enter the staffroom and get back the confiscated items.”

“Umm, let's hurry up before Ironman realizes it.”

“Got it!”

After letting the mop lean against the wall, Hideyoshi and I quickly head towards the staffroom.

“I'm going in then.”

I took the cupboard key from Hideyoshi's hands and reach my hand out for the door.

“There’s no problem, right?”

“No need to worry. I’ll try my best to walk into the staffroom without raising too much attention and get those things back.”

I should be just an ordinary student to every teacher, except for Ironman. I should be more suited for this role as compared to Hideyoshi, who has the look of a beauty.

“Really? Then I’ll just wait here for your good news.”

“Mm, I’m going in then~ ‘cuse me~”

I open the staffroom door slightly. No problem, I’m not some irritating guy.

“Yoshii? Hurry up and get over here!”

“Why!? Why am I noticed so soon after entering the room!?”

I got caught by the Ancient Literature teacher immediately after entering the room. Why?

“I want to hear what excuse you have regarding the essay ‘translate the Tsurezuregusa[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#] into Modern Language’!”

“Ah, I did hand in my homework properly.”

“I’m asking why did you turn the Tsurezuregusa into a rap!?”

“Eh? But sensei wanted it to be translated into the modern language, and speaking of modern Japanese, isn’t it—”

“Ah, Yoshii-kun, remember to come over here after you’re done there.”

“Yoshii, that Chemistry report you handed in was too ridiculous! Come over and explain it to me later.”

Unknowingly, I got surrounded by several teachers. Well, if this is the case, forget about completing the plan, I’ll be hounded by these teachers till night! Got to find a way to get away from them!

“Excuse me…”

Just as I’m pondering on what to do, someone else entered the staffroom. Hm? Isn’t that Hideyoshi?

"Ooh, isn’t that Kinoshita? What’s wrong?”

“I, I suddenly…don’t feel too good…but the health teacher isn’t…in…”

Hideyoshi cupped his mouth. He really doesn’t look too good. Is he sick?

“Hideyoshi, are you—”

I frantically rushed towards him. At this moment, he suddenly blinked at me. I see, so he’s acting! As expected of someone from the drama club, I nearly got fooled.

“Sorry, but can I rest here—”

Before finishing, Hideyoshi collapsed onto the floor.

“Ki, Kinoshita! Are you alright?”

“Anyway, let’s take him to the sickbay!”

“You, you’re right! Sensei, please carry his legs!”

A few teachers start to create quite the ruckus. After that, everyone in the staffroom left to accompany Hideyoshi to the sick bay. Brilliantly done, Hideyoshi!

“Let’s use this opportunity to get back those confiscated items. Let me see, Ironman…no wait, it’s Nishimura. Nishimura’s…”

I checked the nametag on the cupboards which are according to order. Oh, found it. It’s this one.

“…Speaking of which, I somehow imagined that bugs will crawl out of Ironman’s cupboard.”

Though I’m a bit fearful, I have no time to hesitate. I pull out the key Hideyoshi handed to me and pull the door handle down, opening the metal cupboard effortlessly.

“Oh, it’s unexpectedly clean…”

The cupboard’s arranged rather neatly, and the bag of confiscated goods are placed in an obvious place.

“Let’s get out of here before someone notices—hm?”

Just as I was about to lock the cupboard up and run away, I noticed a pile of old books tied up in raffia strings. Should be meant for throwing away.

“Uu~hm…since he’s going to throw it, I might as well take it. Maybe I can get some money as well.”

After grabbing the books with both hands, I immediately dashed out of the staffroom.

“Okay! At least we achieved our goal!”

After what happened just now, I brought the spoils—the bag of confiscated items back to Yuuji, only taking away my own stuff and the pile of old books. I then took them over to a second-hand shop to exchange these spoils for cash.

My handheld games and gaming software garnered a price lower than what I expected, while that pile of books got quite the price; what a nice mistake in estimation. I really got to thank Ironman for this.

“Let me see, is that girl here~”

“Ah! Onii-chan! You're here!”

Hazuki-chan immediately came running over to me the moment I approached the park. She really looked like a cute puppy, and that even warms my heart. Maybe it's because I'm often surrounded by idiots, Ironman and a violent girl...

“Mm, because we arranged to meet each other. Oh yeah, where did you get that doll from?”

Looking closely, Hazuki-chan's hugging something similar to the Noi doll that she wanted to buy (is that what it's called?). It looks as if it was sewn by hand.

“There was a pretty onee-chan who came over and said to me 'If that onii-chan couldn't succeed, then give this to your sister!' and handed it over to me!”

“?”
“And she also said 'If that onii-chan managed to buy the doll, i'll give this doll to you.'.”

The kid's lac of order in her speech confused me.

Erm, let me straighten Hazuki-chan's words out—

—A pretty onee-chan came to Hazuki-chan today.

—And then, she handed this handmade doll over to Hazuki-chan

—This pretty onee-chan even said that if I couldn't do it, she'll give this doll to Hazuki-chan's sister as a gift.

—But if I succeeded, this doll will go to Hazuki-chan.

—So that's how it is.

“Mmm, is that so? Then this doll will go to hazuki-chan.”

“Eh? Really?”

“Yeah. And this doll will go to Hazuki-chan's sister.”

I hand over the large doll in my hand over to Hazuki-chan. It should be tough for her petite body to carry such a large doll, but she still received it delightedly.

“This is great! Thank you, onii-chan!”

“No problems. It'll be great if your sister can cheer up.”

I patted her head. Hazuki-chan seems to enjoy it as she slowly closes her eyes.

“Uu~ Ah, that's right! Onii-chan, can you lend me your ear?”

“Eh? What is it? Are you going to say a secret to me or something?”

“don't ask, just lend me your ear.”

Is she about to thank me? I'm really touched. One can't become a proper adult if the person can't even say 'thank you' or 'sorry'.

“Okay, what is it?”

I bent over to match her height, but unexpectedly—

“Thank you, onii-chan♪”

Whoosh! A cute sensation passes my face. Eh? This...don't tell me this is...

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 043.jpg|thumb]]

“Wha, wha, wha...”

“Onii-chan may be an idiot, but he's so gentle! Hazuki-cahn loves you! When I grow up, I'll let you become my husband!”

Without waiting for me to reply, Hazuki-chan skips out of the park.

Re, recently, these elementary school students are...

I touched my face with my hand, seemingly wanting to wipe away the soft sensation that's left on the face. Even without looking at the mirror, I know my face is red. How, how embarrassing...she's just an elementary school kid...

“Hoo...time for me to go back as well...”

After lifting my bag up and slinging it over my back, I head off towards the exit of the park. While exiting, I see a familiar figure yesterday. That person is—

“Excuse me...are you Himeji-san?”

“Ah, yes, what is it—YO, YOSHII-KUN!”

So it's Himeji-san. It sure is hard to find another pretty girl. I can't possibly be mistaken.

“Sorry, I seemed to have scared you.”

“No, no worries. I was just dazed...”

Our conversation got interrupted just like that. This, this is really awkward...what should I say to a friend who I haven't met for a long time?

“Erm, that...it's really a coincidence that we met her. Did you just finish class? But you look rather tired here, are you?”

“Yes,because I stayed up all night...”

“Hei~so Himeji-san would also stay up.”

The impression she gives is that she lives her life normally, but it's unexpected that she would stay up.

“That's not it, I just stayed up last night, because I got something I have to do no matter what...”

She inadvertently yawned as she continued to talk. Himeji-san sure is cute when she lets out some tears due to sleepiness.

“Then, I'll be going off in this direction, goodbye.”

Ah, mm, byebye.”

I waved my hand to Himeji-san, who bowed to me courteously.

While walking home, I just realized—oh ya, why did Himeji-san appear in such a place?

<center>☆</center>

“...There was a case of theft in the staffroom room.”

The next morning, during self-study period, Ironman suddenly mentioned this. He's definitely referring to the bag of confiscated items that we got yesterday.

“Such a tragedy worth being angry over, don't you think so, Yoshii?”

He actually threw this question at me. As expected of Ironman, he must have realized that I was the perpetrator, but who will follow you obediently?

“Yeah, sure is worth sighing over.”

I naturally replied with these few words. No problems, I got everything under control.

“Really? Speaking of which, that culprit even took sensei's books.”

Hm? Books? Is he referring to that bundle of books? Wasn't he going to throw them away?

“And that culprit actually had the guts to use his own identity to sell my books to a second-hand shop.”

“Is that so, he sure has guts.”

“Yeah, hahahaha!”

“Ahhahaha...”

Ironman and I started laughing with all enthusiasm. Really, we're laughing with all sorts of happiness—at least it lookde that way if not for those eyes.

“YOSHII! GET READY TO DIE!!!”

“So, sorry! Who knew that it was sensei's collection, I didn't—”

“Are you saying that you didn't even think of it?”

“No, I did think about it, but then I thought 'since its Ironman's, it doesn't matter~'! OW! OUCH! SENSEI! MY SKULLCAP GOT SMASHED IN MY YOU!”

“So you idiot has the highest suspicion. Looks like I have to be even more careful and watch you.”

“Sensei! I'm feeling that I've been watched by you all this time, there's no way for you to watch me further!”

“No, there still is, right? I got a really precious title of honor that's suitable for you—“

“Eh, this is...”

“Everyone at the staff meeting this morning have all agreed, so accept this. This is a present that sensei's handing you.”

From who knows when, Ironman suddenly has a piece of paper in his hand. This plain white paper has only a single line on it.

—Yoshii Akihisa.

The above mentioned has been designed as the 'Punishment Inspector' of Fumitzuki Gakuen.

<center>☆</center>

“Onee-chan!”

Hm? Hazuki, what's up?”

“Well, this is for onee-chan!”

“Eh? Isn't this the Noi doll that I always wanted? How did you...”

“Because onee-chan looked so lethargic. Hazuki prepared it for onee-chan to cheer onee-chan up!”

“Hazuki...really, you...thank you, onee-chan's really happy!”

“Schoolwork may be tough, but you must work hard, Minami nee-chan!”

“Hm, I'll do my best! I'll feel like I lost if I continue to mess around like this. And also...”

“And also what?”

“i'm mindful of someone in school.”

“Eh? Onee-chan's mindful of someone? Who is it? How is that person like?”

“Well~as repayment of the Noi doll, I'll only say this to Hazuki. That person is in the same class as me, and he's one huge idiot~”

<noinclude>
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|-
| Back to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Novel Illustrations|Novel Illustrations]]
| Return to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Fumizuki News|Fumizuki News (An interview with Yoshii Akihisa from Class 2-F)]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3.5 Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～

2011-04-20T15:05:55Z

Caolsei:

==Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～==

'''Please fill in the correct name of the historical person in the blank below.'''

The person who instituted the rakuichi rakuza and abolished monopolies to promote business and economic growth is ______.

'''Himeji Mizuki’s answer:'''

“Oda Nobunaga”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Correct answer.

'''Shimada Minami’s answer:'''

“Chonmage”[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#]

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Gotten used to Japan already? Sensei’s a bit worried on seeing your answer.

'''Yoshii Akihisa’s answer:'''

“Nobu”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

You’re very familiar with him, aren't you?

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 007.jpg|thumb]]

After we shifted here, onee-chan seemed to be a lot more lethargic.

Is it because she’s being bullied at school? Or is it that there’s someone she finds irritating?

But then again, every time onee-chan talked about those classmates, it sounded really interesting. Onee-chan also seemed like she really likes them…

If so, why’s onee-chan so lethargic?

Is it because of school work? Onee-chan did say before the she has some difficulty.

I hope the onee-chan can recover soon.

It’s going to be onee-chan’s birthday, would onee-chan be motivated if I give her a huge plushie? Onee-chan always loved dolls after all.

Mm, let’s do that! I’ll buy a big big Noi doll for onee-chan to cheer her up!

…I wonder if I have enough pocket money?

<center>☆</center>

“EVERYONE FREEZE! PUT YOUR BAGS ON THE TABLE AND LET ME SEE WHAT YOU BROUGHT TO SCHOOL!”

Just right after morning self-study period started, the homeroom teacher in charge of our class, Iron—I’ll try that again, Nishimura-sensei, who’s in charge of our class, suddenly declared this without warning.

Argh! Not good! I brought nothing that’s related to attending lessons at all!

—Should I carry my bag and run away at the fastest speed I can?

For that moment, that idea appeared in my mind.

“Let me tell you beforehand, don’t ever think of running away!”

It’s a difficult task to run away from this homeroom teacher. Besides, this guy’s a brawny teacher with the moniker ‘ironman’. No matter how we try to run, he’ll use this body that’s trained for an ‘Ironman’ triathlon to pursue us relentlessly.

“Alright, I’m going to start checking. If there’s anything unrelated to attending lessons, I will confiscate them without leaving anything.”

Starting from the first row near the corridor, Ironman startst to check the contents of all the bags one by one and confiscate the poker cards and magazines that each person brought.

“Sakamoto, let me see what’s inside your pocket.”

Among us, one of the students has not only his bag, even his pockets are to be checked.

“…Damn it.”

Sakamoto Yuuji makes a sound in agony—he’s my best worst friend.

However, he still obediently rummages through his pocket and pulls out an MP3.

“As expected. I’ll be confiscating this.”

After saying this, Ironman puts Yuuji’s MP3 into his confiscation pouch. Yuuji, who never expected his pocket to be search through, glares at Ironman defiantly.

(This is a disaster, isn’t it, Yuuji?)

I whispered to Yuuji’s ear.

(Really a disaster. Would they normally check pockets? I’m the only one who got my pockets checked!)

(Can’t be helped. Who asked Yuuji to be such a bad person?)

(…Go to hell!)

Looking closely, it seems like Ironman’s method of checking will change according to the student. He’ll only ask the well-behaved students to open their bags and briefly look through their bags once. But for the ill-behaved students, he’ll check thoroughly, even including the inside bags of the bag.

“You’re next, Yoshii Akihisa.”

“Ah, yes.”

Ironman arrives in front of me. Even though I don’t think that he’ll ask me to rummage through my pockets like Yuuji—

“Take off your uniform first, and change into your P.E. attire.”

“Eh? Aren’t you being too wary?”

This level of trust far exceeds what I imagined.

“Well…Nishimura-sensei, for me to change in front of the girls, it’s a bit…”

“That won’t do. you may be hiding some prohibited item in your trousers, so take them out.”

“How can you do this! Even if it’s me, I can’t possibly go to that extent! You should at least trust me—”

Just as I agitatedly approached sensei, ‘CLACK!’, something seemed to drop out from the leg of my trousers.

“Oi, Akihisa, your NDS dropped out.”

I received the handheld gaming console that Yuuji nicely helped me picked up, and after saying thanks, I again face sensei.

“Sensei, believe in me, will you?”

“Forget about wearing P.E. attire.”

How, how is this possible! He’s actually even more wary now!

“You actually brought gaming consoles, manga, light novels, DVD…what one earth are you treating school as?”

My precious stuff are confiscated away, one by one. Speaking of which, why did he do a spot-check when I brought so many things out? The value of those confiscated items may total up to be tens of thousands yen.

“Are these all? I said before, the school is a place for you to learn knowledge, you are not allowed to bring anything unrelated to school.”

After searching, Ironman carried the confiscated items back to the podium. I won’t be able to see my precious again…

“Alright, since you people brought all these along, morning self-study will be cancelled. The first lesson will be ‘summoning practical’, all students are to immediately rush over to the gym.”

After saying this, Ironman carries all the confiscated items and leaves the classroom.

<center>☆</center>

“—Summon!”

Hearing the summoning call echo throughout the gym, I say to Yuuji, who’s beside me.

“…It’s only early morning and we’re already so unlucky.”

“Yeah, that MP3 I bought last month actually got confiscated, damn it.”

“Wah, that’s not too long ago.”

“That one was expensive, you know!”

Yuuji’s wild looking face shrivels with sadness as he continues to complain. I can understand~~this feeling.”

“Akihisa, you got your handheld games confiscated as well, right? There’s quite a few of them.”

“Mm…the total value should be over 30,000 yen.”

Handheld games, game software, DVDs and CDs; totaling up the value of all the confiscated items, the number 1 this time should be either me or Muttsulini. How unlucky…”

“Next, Himeji Mizuki, please step forward.”

“Ye, yes.”

“Oh, it’s Himeji now? Rare for her to wear a P.E. attire. Muttsulini, is it really alright not to take photos of her?”

“…My camera got confiscated.”

“I see, quite the pity. We’re in different classes, so it’s rare to see Himeji-san in a P.E. attire.”

“There’s only this one summoning practical.”

“…(Lowers head dejectedly).”

Muttsulini’s so depressed that he can’t even lift his head up. Sigh, this can’t be helped anyway.

Silky and smooth long hair, and cute and innocent look, an ample chest that seems to be self-aware and supports the uniform; Even if it’s not Muttsulini, any guy will want to take a photo of her pretty figure; I know that I definitely want to.

“Is, is this how you do it? Summon!”

Himeji-san doesn’t really seem confident as she mutters. A geometrical magic array appears beside her feet, and Himeji-san’s summoned beast appears in front of everyone.

“As expect of Himeji, her summoned beast sure looks impressive…”

“Yeah, and cute too.”

Himeji-san’s summoned beast looks really cute. Since a summoned beast is basically formed from the caster’s appearance, and since the caster’s already so cute looking, there’s no need to emphasize it further.

But speaking of which, what makes her summoned beast so impressive—

“Most likely, nobody else will be able to wield such a terrifyingly huge sword.”

“Yeah, only Himeji-san is able to do that.”

Her summoned beast is wielding a Western longsword that’s several times longer than her height, and she’s lifting it effortlessly. Anyone can tell that this summoned beast isn’t to be underestimated.

Class C, Himeji Mizuki, Combined subjects 3943 points.

Vs

Class C, Furukawa Ayumi, Combined subjects 1264 points.

The reference points appear in front of us. These are the results of the previous mid-term exams.

“I see, so that’s why she’s so strong.”

“It’s almost 4000 points. Himeji-san sure is smart.”

Mmm…holed up in a corner, we continue to nod our heads away.

The strength of a summoned beast is equivalent to the points that the owner gets. Since the test summoning system totals up the marks, basically, the higher amount of points a person gets, the stronger the summoned beast will be.

“Speaking of which, don’t Akihisa and Himeji know each other?”

“Mm~ she was my grade school classmate…but we haven’t spoken to each other for years. She should have forgotten about me, right?”

We’re in different classes right now, separated for a long time. If there’s a chance, I’ll definitely want to talk to her, but there’s no real chance for me to talk to any girl from another class. If I’m to go to her class and immediately say “Himeji-san, I got something to say to you”, this will look like a confession no matter what.

“I see, you’ll most likely be streamed into different classes next year. I can you can be erased from Hiemji’s memory.”

“Next year? Are you talking about the streaming exam?”

“Yeah, you definitely won’t be able to be in the same class as her anyway.”

“Now that you mentioned it, that’s right…”

After we entered school, we were streamed into different classes like other schools. But next year, things will be different. We’ll be sorted according to our grades. Though Himeji-san is in class C, when we become second-years, she’ll definitely be sorted into class A with those top grades of hers. If so, me and Yuuji will definitely be unable to be classmates with her since we’re just straddling about in class D anyway.

“I’ll be forgotten by her…this sure feels rather lonely…”

“Yeah, there’s no benefit for her to remember you anyway.”

“How can you say that!”

Just as we’re blankly seeing other classes battle it out and talking away—

“Next! Yoshii Akihisa and Shimada Minami!”

Ironman—let me repeat that again, this is the voice of our homeroom teacher, Nishimura-sensei.

Recovering myself, I find that those before me who were waiting to practice their summoning are all back.

“I’m going then.”

“Go then. You’re a ‘punishment inspector’ candidate anyway, go learn how to control a summoned beast properly.”

“…I say, I’m different from you Yuuji. I’m not some problematic kid!”

I rolled my eyes back at Yuuji. Really, what about being a ‘punishment inspector’? That’s really rude. Aren’t they saying that I’m a problematic student? Why is he calling me this when it’s basically the equivalent of being an idiot?

“Hurry up, Yoshii!!”

“Alright~”

Hearing Ironman roar at me, I hastily increase my pace.

Paying attention, the training partner has already finished her summoning.

“…”

The person stares at the summoned beast in front of her in shock. This girl with an energetic-looking ponytail and attractive long legs is my classmate, Shimada-san. At this moment, she reveals a slight melancholic look that doesn’t fit her. What happened? Why’s she looking so depressed and lethargic? Is her summoned beast even weak and useless than what she thought would be?”

“What’s wrong, Shimada-san? Are you shocked that your summoned beast is so weak?”

After saying this, I see that she seems to be healed by my gentleness. The grey clouds above her are gone, now replaced with a look of delight.

“Ah, so Yoshii’s the opponent. How delightful.”

Shimada-san slightly blushes. Seeing her so happy, I felt happy as well—oh my, to reveal her feelings to me in front of everyone like this, this kid’s really troublesome.”

“Because it’s great to beat up Yoshii.”

…This kid’s really troublesome!

“Shimada-san, the target’s the summoned beast, not us.”

I’m a little worried, so I confirmed the rules with her again. This is the summoning practical that’s meant for the summoning battles next year, so no matter what, this should be a battle between summoned beasts.

“You’re right, we won’t be fighting each other.”

Shimada-san immediately nodded her head in agreement. Great, seems like she understood.

“Since I’ll be the one dishing out the beatdown anyway.”

SEEMS LIKE SHE DIDN’T UNDERSTAND AT ALL!

“That, sensei, what Shimada-san did just now was an act of violence. If you have the time to check our belongings, you should do something about this case of school violence, right?”

“…Shimada, even if the opponent’s Yoshii, violence is bad.”

“But sensei…”

No buts. A no is a no, you understand?”

“…Yes.”

“Really…so you really understand? If so—”

Ironman suddenly reveals a smirk and says,

“—I’ll give you a special discount this time.”

“Eh? Aren’t those words really weird?”

Am I thinking too much? It seemed like a teacher just allowed a case of school violence!

“I’ll do my best!”

“Right, so you must work hard.”

“Ah haha, sensei, Shimada-san, you two are really stupid. Do you think that you two can beat me so easily? If so, I’m going to counter and beat you two—I’M SORRY, IT’S MY FAULT, PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!”

It’s useless even if I apologised.

Don’t tell me…that those cautious words of mine caused this disaster?

<center>☆</center>

“Ho…ever since morning inspection, it’s been one disaster after another today…”

After a day’s worth of lessons, it’s dismissal time. I’m chatting away with those guys who I usually talk to.

“That’s because Akihisa-bro brought so many unnecessary things to school.”

Sitting beside me and showing me a smile is Kinoshita Hideyoshi, who’s in the same class as me, Yuuji and Muttsulini. It’s already weird to hear him speak like an old man, and he has a beauty’s face on him. He really likes to make comments. Even so, I do feel that he’s the most normal person after me, since the other two are so abnormal that words can’t describe them.

“Speaking of which, Hideyoshi didn’t get anything confiscated, right?

“Of course I did, I got some costumes and props confiscated from me. Even though I told sensei that it’s for the drama club, they still got confiscated either way.”

The school has already provided some props and costumes for Hideyoshi, so Hideyoshi himself doesn’t need to bring them. If so, these are unnecessary things. However—

“There’s no need to confiscate them all anyway, he could have given us some leeway. Who expected Ironman’s brain to be so hard.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“His brain’s definitely filled with lead.”

Muttsulini and Yuuji seem to agree with me. This can’t be helped, since they got quite a few things confiscated as well.

And I actually thought that ‘we’re just having summoning practical today, so there’re no lessons; should be rather relaxing today.”

It was supposed to be relaxing, but I guess it’s better to have lessons without the search.

“Summoning practical…”

Hearing my little grumbling, Yuuji muttered to himself.

“Eh? What’s wrong, Yuuji?”

“Nothing. It’s just that I remembered that we have to take part in summoning war next year.”

For some reason, he sure seemed happy when he said this.

Speaking of summoning war, well, it’s about having a summoning battle between classes with the class facilities on the line. If we can move onto second year without any mishaps, we’ll have this summoning war system on us.

“But why must we have this summoning war system? If we want to differentiate the scores clearly, can’t we just stick grades onto everyone?”

“Well, most likely, they prefer a summoning war to tests since it can motivate students, right? As a class, the students will work hard to not drag their classmates down.”

“I see. So they intend to make us work together and improve our grades without breaking us, right?”

“Yeah, this allows the school to do what they want the most, and that’s ‘to groom students who can showcase their real potential in society’.”

“Oh~ Is that so?”

Just as the four of them were chatting away.

“Ah…really, that Yoshii actually left the cleaning work to me. Where did he go off to?”

A certain student can be heard shouting on the corridor. Is that Shimada-san?

“What the heck, Akihisa. You’re in charge of cleaning today?”

“Mm, but I left the cleaning work to Shimada-san and ran off first.”

“Hmm, according to how I see it, you two have quite the relationship.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“Ah haha, it’s not what you think it is.”

“Really. Once I catch him, I’ll tie his limbs up and throw him down the 3rd level!”

That’s a highly difficult stunt even a stuntman will be afraid of.

“Sorry, I don’t think I can protect my own life any longer. I’ll be leaving now!”

Without saying anything else, I grabbed my bag and dashed out of the corridor. I love my life.

“Ah, Yoshii! So you’re hiding here! Hold it right there!”

“I’m not going to wait! You’re going to kill me, right?”

“I’m not angry at all. Just hold on, will you!?”

That’s definitely a lie.

“These two really have rather good feelings.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

She said that she’s not angry, but she’s holding onto a rope for some reason.

<center>☆</center>

“Hoo…that was scary~”

It’s been past 30 minutes since I came running out of school, and before I knew it, I’m on a shopping street.

“Well. I don’t intend to buy anything, so I guess I’ll go back home—hm?”

Just as I intended to head home, I saw a familiar figure walk into a shop. Isn’t that Himeji-san?

“I guess it’s somewhat of a fate for us to meet here. Should I be courageous and call her…”

Though we did study in the same class during elementary school, we were separated into different classes during middle school. Before I knew it, Himeji-san seemed so distant from me. To see her in front of me after so many years, I really want to talk to her—the reason why I feel this way is most likely because of Yuuji’s words ‘She’ll erase you from her memory anyway’.

In order to turn my thoughts into action, I follow Himeji-san closely as I walked into the shop…only to find that there’re so many dolls here, it’s unbelievable. Seems like this is a doll shop that a girl will love the most—what the heck, this shop’s basically a doll shop!

“Well, let’s go back. This shop really doesn’t suit me.”

I immediately hasten my pace and walk towards the exit. Anyway, the most important thing right now is to leave this place.

“This is Hazuki’s only request of this lifetime. Please, uncle!”

“Even if you say that, I have to do business, you know…”

The moment I reached the exit, I suddenly heard this conversation. It seemed like a girl’s standing at the counter and telling the cashier something. She seems rather insistent on this. What’s going on?

I felt a bit mindful, so I turn my head to where the voice came from. As I expected, it’s a cashier uncle and a girl who looks like she’s in elementary school.

“I want to get that big Noi doll no matter what. Please, I beg you!”

“Even if you ask me like this…we’re doing business. Wouldn’t it be unfair to the other customers if I give you a little discount? We shopkeepers do have to treat all customers equally.”

“Even so, please!”

“Uuu…really can’t handle you…”

The cashier uncle looked rather troubled as he said this and scratches his face. The girl however continued to beg earnestly. Seeing such a small girl beg like this, I’ll be seen as really cruel if I’m to walk away like this…

“Hey, little girl, why do you want this doll?”

I know that I’m too nosey, but I still ended up getting involved.

Now that a 3rd party has suddenly appeared, the little girl and the uncle revealed a surprised look on their faces.

“Be, because onee-chan didn’t look too good recently. I wanted to buy the doll that she always wanted to hopefully motivate her…”

“Not looking good?”

“Most likely, because she just came back from Germany and couldn’t understand Japanese well!

Shifted houses…even if it’s within Japanese land, anyone will feel lonely when the friends and environment changes, let alone coming back to Japan.

“Even then, onee-chan took over mommy and daddy and did all the housework like sweeping and washing clothes nicely, and often play together with Hazuki…”

Seemed like it hit her sore spot as Hazuki-chan’s wide eyes start to tear up.

“Waa! Don, don’t cry! Nii-san will help you out here!”

“…Really?”

“Mm, really.”

“…Thank you, onii-chan!”

Wiping away the tears, Hazuki-chan reveals a delightful smile.

“Speaking of which, how much does this doll cost?”

The doll in Hazuki-chan’s arms is about 1m tall. If I make a rough estimate, I don’t think 5,000 yen’s going to be enough.

“Including tax, it’ll be a total of 24,800 yen.”

“Sorry, nii-san already tried, but he can’t do it.”

“Onii-chan?”

Hazuki-chan looks rather sad.

Argh! Didn’t expect one to be that expensive. Under these conditions, the declaration of surrender came out of my mouth without thinking through.

“Then how much does Hazuki-chan has?”

“I only have 10,000yen…”

So we’re missing 15,000. Including my entire fortune, there’s only 11,699 yen. We can’t even hitting the price of 24,800 yen! The most we can pay is half.

“Excuse me, can you sell this doll to us at 11,699 yen?”

“Eh, I just said before that that we’re doing a business here…”

The reply’s still the same.

“Onii-chan, this isn’t any different from before.”

Hazuki-chan whispered to my ear.

She’s right. Up till now, I’ve been doing the same thing as what Hazuki-chan’s been doing. However, things will be different from now on. I’m not an elementary school student; let’s show her how an adult (high school student) does things!

“We have only 11,699 yen in total, that’s about half the price of the doll, right?”

“Ya. That’s still not quite enough.”

“Hazuki-chan wants this doll, and uncle wants to sell this to her, but you’re unwilling to sell it to her at half price. If so, I have a great idea!”

“Hm? What is it?”

“We can rip the doll in half and sell the right side to—eh? What? Why are you two seeing me as an idiot?”

“…Are you really a high school student?”

“…Onii-chan’s an idiot!”

I, I actually got called stupid by an elementary school kid!

“I can’t give you a discount, but I can guarantee that I won’t sell this doll away for the time being. You can go back to discuss with your parents first.”

Making this conclusion, the uncle ended the conversation just like this.

“Can’t you ask your parents to buy it for you, Hazuki-chan?”

Having walked out of the shop, we came to the park to discuss our plans.

“Mommy and daddy aren’t normally at home…so they would leave the money to one-chan. If I want to buy something, onee-chan will definitely ask for a reason…”

“I see, uu~”

Wanting to do something for her beloved older sister—Hazuki-chan’s heart’s ever so glamorous, it’s way different from my family who sent me to Fumitzuki Gakuen on the excuse of ‘not wanting to waste school fees’. I must help Hazuki-chan in order to prevent her from losing this intimacy with her family.

But speaking of which, what should I do? It’ll be good if I have some more money, but my money’s about to be used it…

“Oh ya! Hazuki can get money if she sells her manga to a second-hand shop, right?”

Hazuki-chan thought of this brilliant plan as her eyes sparkle. It’s true that we can get money just like this, but I think that she can’t get so much anyway. Of course, it’s a different case altogether if I have those handheld games that were confiscated this morning—

“Hm? Oh ya, there’s this plan after all!”

“…Onii-chan, have you thought of something?”

“I can’t possibly get it back it my hands anyway. If I’m successful, we may be able to get enough money to buy the doll…”

Though I don’t think it can work…mm! It’s still worth a try though.

“Okay! Hazuki-chan, can you come back to the park tomorrow?”

“Y, yes. I can come over…”

“Then we’ll meet here tomorrow. It’s getting dark now, let’s go home.”

I waved my hands and said goodbye to Hazuki-chan. Anyway, I got to discuss it with Yuuji and the rest tomorrow.

“Ah, mm, bye bye…”

Speaking of which, did Himeji-san really enter that shop?

<center>☆</center>

“So you want to take back those confiscated items?”

The next morning, in the same classroom, I talked to the trio as per usual.

“I do feel that it’s a pity to leave those things that got confiscated yesterday, but…”

“Uu~mm…ya, but the opponent’s that Ironman. We may be designated as ‘Punishment Inspectors’ if we’re not careful…”

Yuuji and Hideyoshi lower their chin and ponder. Seems like they don’t intend to help me. This is bad, looks like I have to deal with this on my own.

“…I approve of Akihisa’s proposal.”

“Eh? Muttsulini? You’re willing to help me?”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

Great! Now at least I have someone who specializes in stealth helping me out.

“…Never mind, let’s give it a go.”

“Ah? So Yuuji’s okay with it?”

“Yeah. I just bought that MP3 recently, and I accumulated quite a debt to Ironman, so let’s settle this once and for all.”

Yuuji smirked. What an enthusiastic bad guy’s face.

“If so, I’ll help out as well. If I can get back those things, I don’t want to give up as well.”

In the end, even Hideyoshi nodded his head, and everyone decided to take part in this. As expected of the group problematic first-years.

“Right now, the most important thing is to investigate where our targets are.”

“That’s right. If we don’t even know where Ironman hid those confiscated items, we can’t possibly get them back even if we want to.”

The confiscated items may have ended up being abandoned, but they were just confiscated yesterday, so Ironman should still have them with him.

“That’s the case. Akihisa, remove the silence function of the phone.”

“Eh? Why?”

“Don’t ask too much, just do it. You want those confiscated items back, right?”

“…I’m not really sure what’s going on, but I just need to remove the silence function, right?”

“That’s right.”

The phone can’t possibly ring during lesson time, there shouldn’t be any problems, right? Let’s just follow what Yuuji told me to do.

I pull my handphone out from my pocket and took it out of silent mode.

“Oi, you people better hurry up and sit down. I’m going to start taking attendance.”

Seeing our homeroom teacher Ironman walk into the classroom, I immediately slip the handphone back into my pocket.

“Alright, let’s begin.”

Thus, our battle for the confiscated items officially begins now.

“Shimada.”

“Here.”

“Shimizu.”

“Here.”

At the usual time of taking attendance, Ironman’s coarse voice echoes clearly throughout the classroom.

“Yamaguchi.”

“Here.”

“Watanabe.”

“Here.”

—Beep beep beep.

Suddenly, a beep interrupted the class while attendance is taken. Whose phone is it? Really, do think that we have such a stupid person in class. The phone will definitely get confiscated when it rings in class.

“…Yoshii, hand over your phone.”

“…Yes.”

The problem is, this stupid person was me.

Damn it! Why must it ring at this moment!? Who called me!?

<<Missed call: Sakamoto Yuuji>>

“Yu, Yuuji, you betrayed me!”

“I’ll consficate the handphone then.”

“Ahh! Handphone! MY HANDPHONE!”

My handphone got taken away by Ironman mercilessly.

“Very good. Nobody’s came late nor skipped classes. I hope that all students will continue to keep this up.”

After taking the attendance, Ironman moves his heavy feet out of the classroom—together with my handphone.

“Very good. Part 1 of the plan is complete.”

“Yuuji! What sort of grudge do you have against me! Now my handphone got confiscated by Ironman all because of you!”

“This is a bait meant to fish out where our targets are. We just need to take them back.”

“Eh? Bait?”

“That’s right. I deliberately allowed Ironman to confiscate your handphone in order to find out where Ironman hid those items.”

“Why didn’t you tell me in the first place…”

And if possible, I hope that you can use your handphone as bait.

“…I’m back.”

“WAHH!”

Suddenly talking right behind me. You scared me~

“Oh, Muttsulini came back already. How was it?”

“…Those confiscated items are placed in the staff storage cupboard.”

“As expected of Muttsulini, erasing your own presence to tail people, that truly is your specialty. I’m impressed.”

Seems like Muttsulini went to tail Ironman and investigate where my handphone was hidden. If it’s tailing others without attracting attention, Yuuji can’t do it, and Hideyoshi doesn’t have the skills.

“…But the cupboard’s locked.”

“Okay. So where’s the key?”

“…In the rear left pocket of Ironman’s pants.”

“I see. If so, we have to snatch the ket from him.”

“Ya, but how are we going to do that?”

“No problems. I got a good idea. We’ll take action during cleaning time.”

Anyway, let's attend lessons and wait for school dismissal.

<center>☆</center>

It's finally dismissal time.

“So, what plan do you have?”

As I tried to sneak out yesterday, I was punished to sweep the entire corridor alone. Thus, I'm discussing the plan with Yuuji and the rest while twisting the mop around. These damned guys don't have any intentions of helping out in the first place.

“We'll be using that.”

Yuuji lifts his chin and points.

“A pail? What are we going to do with that?”

“We're going to use that to splash water on Ironman and make him take off his clothes.”

I see. If so, we can then take his clothes away and take the key to the cupboard,

“Mm hm~ this method is simple and easy to succeed.”

Hideyoshi's right. We can't possibly fail. Basically, there's only the last problem to this plan, and that is—whoever going to splash the water on Ironman will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.

“There's only one problem in this plan, and that's the one who's going to splash the water, 'Akihisa' will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.”

Hold on! Is it decided that I'll be the one in charge of doing this?

“However, that's not really a huge problem.”

THAT'S A HUGE PROBLEM TO ME!

“Oi, isn't that too strange? Let's settle this with rock paper scissors!”

“Ooh, look! Me and our target's already here.”

“Very good. You got to do your best, Akihisa!”

“...Do your best.”

“Eh? Hold on!”

The trio already wordlessly retreated back in the shortest time possible.

Ironman has already climbed up the stairs. If so, I can only do this!

My eyes have already captured the target, and the relative speed was estimated. The prepared weapon's in my hand, everything's okay—time to attack!

“WAAHH! I SLIPPED!”

Dragging the mop, I deliberately fell forward by letting my feet stagger and aim the pail at Ironman, who's on the stairs. GET WET!

“GUAH!”

How, how is it possible! As expected of Ironman! To be able to suddenly react in the blink of an eye and dodge the splash thanks to his superhuman senses! However—

“WHERE ARE YOU ESCAPING TO!?”

I drag the mop in my hand to where Ironman dodged to. I won't admit defeat so easily!

Phoosh, Clak cak cak.

The water from the pail drenched Ironman, and the pail rolls asie. Mission accomplished.

I pick up the pail and mop that I threw out as I remain mindful not to step on the puddle of water, saying to a stunned Ironman “Sorry, I slipped—AHH, sensei! An encyclopaedia isn't to be used as a weapon!”

“I thought I just heard you say 'Where are you escaping to', didn't I?”

“That's just a hallucination.”

“Stop trying to lie to me with such a serious look on your face. Get ready to die!”

“Sen, sensei, please don't use the edge of the encyclopaedia!”

Where are you guys now! Come save me! I'll definitely be beaten down by Ironman into a panda if this keeps up!

“Ahh, Akihisa, you really ended up doing it.”

Yuuji and the rest appeared out of nowhere. Anyway, I'm saved~

“I told you so many times 'not to splash water onto sensei'...”

“Ow, OWW! SENSEI! I SAID THAT I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE ALREADY!”

They, they didn't help out at all! These damned guys! Are they intending to sit around and watch?

“Sensei, punish Akihisa later. I guess you better change your clothes. If you don't mind, I'll lend my P.E. attire to you.”

“That's right. Sorry, then lend me that. Yoshii, stay behind and scrub the floor clean!”

Leaving these words behind, Ironman, who was drenched by me, head off to the classroom with Yuuji and the rest to change clothes.

“...So unfortunate.”

Anyway, I remained behind to clean the floor up. Besides, I have the cleaning tools in my hand.

Just as I'm working hard to wipe the water off the floor, Hideyoshi walks out of the classroom and moves towards me.

“I got the key, Akihisa.”

“Really? Then we just need to enter the staffroom and get back the confiscated items.”

“Umm, let's hurry up before Ironman realizes it.”

“Got it!”

After letting the mop lean against the wall, Hideyoshi and I quickly head towards the staffroom.

“I'm going in then.”

I took the cupboard key from Hideyoshi's hands and reach my hand out for the door.

“There’s no problem, right?”

“No need to worry. I’ll try my best to walk into the staffroom without raising too much attention and get those things back.”

I should be just an ordinary student to every teacher, except for Ironman. I should be more suited for this role as compared to Hideyoshi, who has the look of a beauty.

“Really? Then I’ll just wait here for your good news.”

“Mm, I’m going in then~ ‘cuse me~”

I open the staffroom door slightly. No problem, I’m not some irritating guy.

“Yoshii? Hurry up and get over here!”

“Why!? Why am I noticed so soon after entering the room!?”

I got caught by the Ancient Literature teacher immediately after entering the room. Why?

“I want to hear what excuse you have regarding the essay ‘translate the Tsurezuregusa[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#] into Modern Language’!”

“Ah, I did hand in my homework properly.”

“I’m asking why did you turn the Tsurezuregusa into a rap!?”

“Eh? But sensei wanted it to be translated into the modern language, and speaking of modern Japanese, isn’t it—”

“Ah, Yoshii-kun, remember to come over here after you’re done there.”

“Yoshii, that Chemistry report you handed in was too ridiculous! Come over and explain it to me later.”

Unknowingly, I got surrounded by several teachers. Well, if this is the case, forget about completing the plan, I’ll be hounded by these teachers till night! Got to find a way to get away from them!

“Excuse me…”

Just as I’m pondering on what to do, someone else entered the staffroom. Hm? Isn’t that Hideyoshi?

"Ooh, isn’t that Kinoshita? What’s wrong?”

“I, I suddenly…don’t feel too good…but the health teacher isn’t…in…”

Hideyoshi cupped his mouth. He really doesn’t look too good. Is he sick?

“Hideyoshi, are you—”

I frantically rushed towards him. At this moment, he suddenly blinked at me. I see, so he’s acting! As expected of someone from the drama club, I nearly got fooled.

“Sorry, but can I rest here—”

Before finishing, Hideyoshi collapsed onto the floor.

“Ki, Kinoshita! Are you alright?”

“Anyway, let’s take him to the sickbay!”

“You, you’re right! Sensei, please carry his legs!”

A few teachers start to create quite the ruckus. After that, everyone in the staffroom left to accompany Hideyoshi to the sick bay. Brilliantly done, Hideyoshi!

“Let’s use this opportunity to get back those confiscated items. Let me see, Ironman…no wait, it’s Nishimura. Nishimura’s…”

I checked the nametag on the cupboards which are according to order. Oh, found it. It’s this one.

“…Speaking of which, I somehow imagined that bugs will crawl out of Ironman’s cupboard.”

Though I’m a bit fearful, I have no time to hesitate. I pull out the key Hideyoshi handed to me and pull the door handle down, opening the metal cupboard effortlessly.

“Oh, it’s unexpectedly clean…”

The cupboard’s arranged rather neatly, and the bag of confiscated goods are placed in an obvious place.

“Let’s get out of here before someone notices—hm?”

Just as I was about to lock the cupboard up and run away, I noticed a pile of old books tied up in raffia strings. Should be meant for throwing away.

“Uu~hm…since he’s going to throw it, I might as well take it. Maybe I can get some money as well.”

After grabbing the books with both hands, I immediately dashed out of the staffroom.

“Okay! At least we achieved our goal!”

After what happened just now, I brought the spoils—the bag of confiscated items back to Yuuji, only taking away my own stuff and the pile of old books. I then took them over to a second-hand shop to exchange these spoils for cash.

My handheld games and gaming software garnered a price lower than what I expected, while that pile of books got quite the price; what a nice mistake in estimation. I really got to thank Ironman for this.

“Let me see, is that girl here~”

“Ah! Onii-chan! You're here!”

Hazuki-chan immediately came running over to me the moment I approached the park. She really looked like a cute puppy, and that even warms my heart. Maybe it's because I'm often surrounded by idiots, Ironman and a violent girl...

“Mm, because we arranged to meet each other. Oh yeah, where did you get that doll from?”

Looking closely, Hazuki-chan's hugging something similar to the Noi doll that she wanted to buy (is that what it's called?). It looks as if it was sewn by hand.

“There was a pretty onee-chan who came over and said to me 'If that onii-chan couldn't succeed, then give this to your sister!' and handed it over to me!”

“?”
“And she also said 'If that onii-chan managed to buy the doll, i'll give this doll to you.'.”

The kid's lac of order in her speech confused me.

Erm, let me straighten Hazuki-chan's words out—

—A pretty onee-chan came to Hazuki-chan today.

—And then, she handed this handmade doll over to Hazuki-chan

—This pretty onee-chan even said that if I couldn't do it, she'll give this doll to Hazuki-chan's sister as a gift.

—But if I succeeded, this doll will go to Hazuki-chan.

—So that's how it is.

“Mmm, is that so? Then this doll will go to hazuki-chan.”

“Eh/ Really?”

“Yeah. And this doll will go to Hazuki-chan's sister.”

I hand over the large doll in my hand over to Hazuki-chan. It should be tough for her petite body to carry such a large doll, but she still received it delightedly.

“This is great! Thank you, onii-chan!”

“No problems. It'll be great if your sister can cheer up.”

I patted her head. Hazuki-chan seems to enjoy it as she slowly closes her eyes.

“Uu~ Ah, that's right! Onii-chan, can you lend me your ear?”

“Eh? What is it? Are you going to say a secret to me or something?”

“don't ask, just lend me your ear.”

Is she about to thank me? I'm really touched. One can't become a proper adult if the person can't even say 'thank you' or 'sorry'.

“Okay, what is it?”

I bent over to match her height, but unexpectedly—

“Thank you, onii-chan♪”

Whoosh! A cute sensation passes my face. Eh? This...don't tell me this is...

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 043.jpg|thumb]]

“Wha, wha, wha...”

“Onii-chan may be an idiot, but he's so gentle! Hazuki-cahn loves you! When I grow up, I'll let you become my husband!”

Without waiting for me to reply, Hazuki-chan skips out of the park.

Re, recently, these elementary school students are...

I touched my face with my hand, seemingly wanting to wipe away the soft sensation that's left on the face. Even without looking at the mirror, I know my face is red. How, how embarrassing...she's just an elementary school kid...

“Hoo...time for me to go back as well...”

After lifting my bag up and slinging it over my back, I head off towards the exit of the park. While exiting, I see a familiar figure yesterday. That person is—

“Excuse me...are you Himeji-san?”

“Ah, yes, what is it—YO, YOSHII-KUN!”

So it's Himeji-san. It sure is hard to find another pretty girl. I can't possibly be mistaken.

“Sorry, I seemed to have scared you.”

“No, no worries. I was just dazed...”

Our conversation got interrupted just like that. This, this is really awkward...what should I say to a friend who I haven't met for a long time?

“Erm, that...it's really a coincidence that we met her. Did you just finish class? But you look rather tired here, are you?”

“Yes,because I stayed up all night...”

“Hei~so Himeji-san would also stay up.”

The impression she gives is that she lives her life normally, but it's unexpected that she would stay up.

“That's not it, I just stayed up last night, because I got something I have to do no matter what...”

She inadvertently yawned as she continued to talk. Himeji-san sure is cute when she lets out some tears due to sleepiness.

“Then, I'll be going off in this direction, goodbye.”

Ah, mm, byebye.”

I waved my hand to Himeji-san, who bowed to me courteously.

While walking home, I just realized—oh ya, why did Himeji-san appear in such a place?

<center>☆</center>

“...There was a case of theft in the staffroom room.”

The next morning, during self-study period, Ironman suddenly mentioned this. He's definitely referring to the bag of confiscated items that we got yesterday.

“Such a tragedy worth being angry over, don't you think so, Yoshii?”

He actually threw this question at me. As expected of Ironman, he must have realized that I was the perpetrator, but who will follow you obediently?

“Yeah, sure is worth sighing over.”

I naturally replied with these few words. No problems, I got everything under control.

“Really? Speaking of which, that culprit even took sensei's books.”

Hm? Books? Is he referring to that bundle of books? Wasn't he going to throw them away?

“And that culprit actually had the guts to use his own identity to sell my books to a second-hand shop.”

“Is that so, he sure has guts.”

“Yeah, hahahaha!”

“Ahhahaha...”

Ironman and I started laughing with all enthusiasm. Really, we're laughing with all sorts of happiness—at least it lookde that way if not for those eyes.

“YOSHII! GET READY TO DIE!!!”

“So, sorry! Who knew that it was sensei's collection, I didn't—”

“Are you saying that you didn't even think of it?”

“No, I did think about it, but then I thought 'since its Ironman's, it doesn't matter~'! OW! OUCH! SENSEI! MY SKULLCAP GOT SMASHED IN MY YOU!”

“So you idiot has the highest suspicion. Looks like I have to be even more careful and watch you.”

“Sensei! I'm feeling that I've been watched by you all this time, there's no way for you to watch me further!”

“No, there still is, right? I got a really precious title of honor that's suitable for you—“

“Eh, this is...”

“Everyone at the staff meeting this morning have all agreed, so accept this. This is a present that sensei's handing you.”

From who knows when, Ironman suddenly has a piece of paper in his hand. This plain white paper has only a single line on it.

—Yoshii Akihisa.

The above mentioned has been designed as the 'Punishment Inspector' of Fumitzuki Gakuen.

<center>☆</center>

“Onee-chan!”

Hm? Hazuki, what's up?”

“Well, this is for onee-chan!”

“Eh? Isn't this the Noi doll that I always wanted? How did you...”

“Because onee-chan looked so lethargic. Hazuki prepared it for onee-chan to cheer onee-chan up!”

“Hazuki...really, you...thank you, onee-chan's really happy!”

“Schoolwork may be tough, but you must work hard, Minami nee-chan!”

“Hm, I'll do my best! I'll feel like I lost if I continue to mess around like this. And also...”

“And also what?”

“i'm mindful of someone in school.”

“Eh? Onee-chan's mindful of someone? Who is it? How is that person like?”

“Well~as repayment of the Noi doll, I'll only say this to Hazuki. That person is in the same class as me, and he's one huge idiot~”

<noinclude>
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| Back to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Novel Illustrations|Novel Illustrations]]
| Return to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Fumizuki News|Fumizuki News (An interview with Yoshii Akihisa from Class 2-F)]]
|-
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</noinclude>

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3.5 Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～

2011-04-20T15:04:28Z

Caolsei:

==Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～==

'''Please fill in the correct name of the historical person in the blank below.'''

The person who instituted the rakuichi rakuza and abolished monopolies to promote business and economic growth is ______.

'''Himeji Mizuki’s answer:'''

“Oda Nobunaga”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Correct answer.

'''Shimada Minami’s answer:'''

“Chonmage”[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#]

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Gotten used to Japan already? Sensei’s a bit worried on seeing your answer.

'''Yoshii Akihisa’s answer:'''

“Nobu”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

You’re very familiar with him, aren't you?

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 007.jpg|thumb]]

After we shifted here, onee-chan seemed to be a lot more lethargic.

Is it because she’s being bullied at school? Or is it that there’s someone she finds irritating?

But then again, every time onee-chan talked about those classmates, it sounded really interesting. Onee-chan also seemed like she really likes them…

If so, why’s onee-chan so lethargic?

Is it because of school work? Onee-chan did say before the she has some difficulty.

I hope the onee-chan can recover soon.

It’s going to be onee-chan’s birthday, would onee-chan be motivated if I give her a huge plushie? Onee-chan always loved dolls after all.

Mm, let’s do that! I’ll buy a big big Noi doll for onee-chan to cheer her up!

…I wonder if I have enough pocket money?

<center>☆</center>

“EVERYONE FREEZE! PUT YOUR BAGS ON THE TABLE AND LET ME SEE WHAT YOU BROUGHT TO SCHOOL!”

Just right after morning self-study period started, the homeroom teacher in charge of our class, Iron—I’ll try that again, Nishimura-sensei, who’s in charge of our class, suddenly declared this without warning.

Argh! Not good! I brought nothing that’s related to attending lessons at all!

—Should I carry my bag and run away at the fastest speed I can?

For that moment, that idea appeared in my mind.

“Let me tell you beforehand, don’t ever think of running away!”

It’s a difficult task to run away from this homeroom teacher. Besides, this guy’s a brawny teacher with the moniker ‘ironman’. No matter how we try to run, he’ll use this body that’s trained for an ‘Ironman’ triathlon to pursue us relentlessly.

“Alright, I’m going to start checking. If there’s anything unrelated to attending lessons, I will confiscate them without leaving anything.”

Starting from the first row near the corridor, Ironman startst to check the contents of all the bags one by one and confiscate the poker cards and magazines that each person brought.

“Sakamoto, let me see what’s inside your pocket.”

Among us, one of the students has not only his bag, even his pockets are to be checked.

“…Damn it.”

Sakamoto Yuuji makes a sound in agony—he’s my best worst friend.

However, he still obediently rummages through his pocket and pulls out an MP3.

“As expected. I’ll be confiscating this.”

After saying this, Ironman puts Yuuji’s MP3 into his confiscation pouch. Yuuji, who never expected his pocket to be search through, glares at Ironman defiantly.

(This is a disaster, isn’t it, Yuuji?)

I whispered to Yuuji’s ear.

(Really a disaster. Would they normally check pockets? I’m the only one who got my pockets checked!)

(Can’t be helped. Who asked Yuuji to be such a bad person?)

(…Go to hell!)

Looking closely, it seems like Ironman’s method of checking will change according to the student. He’ll only ask the well-behaved students to open their bags and briefly look through their bags once. But for the ill-behaved students, he’ll check thoroughly, even including the inside bags of the bag.

“You’re next, Yoshii Akihisa.”

“Ah, yes.”

Ironman arrives in front of me. Even though I don’t think that he’ll ask me to rummage through my pockets like Yuuji—

“Take off your uniform first, and change into your P.E. attire.”

“Eh? Aren’t you being too wary?”

This level of trust far exceeds what I imagined.

“Well…Nishimura-sensei, for me to change in front of the girls, it’s a bit…”

“That won’t do. you may be hiding some prohibited item in your trousers, so take them out.”

“How can you do this! Even if it’s me, I can’t possibly go to that extent! You should at least trust me—”

Just as I agitatedly approached sensei, ‘CLACK!’, something seemed to drop out from the leg of my trousers.

“Oi, Akihisa, your NDS dropped out.”

I received the handheld gaming console that Yuuji nicely helped me picked up, and after saying thanks, I again face sensei.

“Sensei, believe in me, will you?”

“Forget about wearing P.E. attire.”

How, how is this possible! He’s actually even more wary now!

“You actually brought gaming consoles, manga, light novels, DVD…what one earth are you treating school as?”

My precious stuff are confiscated away, one by one. Speaking of which, why did he do a spot-check when I brought so many things out? The value of those confiscated items may total up to be tens of thousands yen.

“Are these all? I said before, the school is a place for you to learn knowledge, you are not allowed to bring anything unrelated to school.”

After searching, Ironman carried the confiscated items back to the podium. I won’t be able to see my precious again…

“Alright, since you people brought all these along, morning self-study will be cancelled. The first lesson will be ‘summoning practical’, all students are to immediately rush over to the gym.”

After saying this, Ironman carries all the confiscated items and leaves the classroom.

<center>☆</center>

“—Summon!”

Hearing the summoning call echo throughout the gym, I say to Yuuji, who’s beside me.

“…It’s only early morning and we’re already so unlucky.”

“Yeah, that MP3 I bought last month actually got confiscated, damn it.”

“Wah, that’s not too long ago.”

“That one was expensive, you know!”

Yuuji’s wild looking face shrivels with sadness as he continues to complain. I can understand~~this feeling.”

“Akihisa, you got your handheld games confiscated as well, right? There’s quite a few of them.”

“Mm…the total value should be over 30,000 yen.”

Handheld games, game software, DVDs and CDs; totaling up the value of all the confiscated items, the number 1 this time should be either me or Muttsulini. How unlucky…”

“Next, Himeji Mizuki, please step forward.”

“Ye, yes.”

“Oh, it’s Himeji now? Rare for her to wear a P.E. attire. Muttsulini, is it really alright not to take photos of her?”

“…My camera got confiscated.”

“I see, quite the pity. We’re in different classes, so it’s rare to see Himeji-san in a P.E. attire.”

“There’s only this one summoning practical.”

“…(Lowers head dejectedly).”

Muttsulini’s so depressed that he can’t even lift his head up. Sigh, this can’t be helped anyway.

Silky and smooth long hair, and cute and innocent look, an ample chest that seems to be self-aware and supports the uniform; Even if it’s not Muttsulini, any guy will want to take a photo of her pretty figure; I know that I definitely want to.

“Is, is this how you do it? Summon!”

Himeji-san doesn’t really seem confident as she mutters. A geometrical magic array appears beside her feet, and Himeji-san’s summoned beast appears in front of everyone.

“As expect of Himeji, her summoned beast sure looks impressive…”

“Yeah, and cute too.”

Himeji-san’s summoned beast looks really cute. Since a summoned beast is basically formed from the caster’s appearance, and since the caster’s already so cute looking, there’s no need to emphasize it further.

But speaking of which, what makes her summoned beast so impressive—

“Most likely, nobody else will be able to wield such a terrifyingly huge sword.”

“Yeah, only Himeji-san is able to do that.”

Her summoned beast is wielding a Western longsword that’s several times longer than her height, and she’s lifting it effortlessly. Anyone can tell that this summoned beast isn’t to be underestimated.

Class C, Himeji Mizuki, Combined subjects 3943 points.

Vs

Class C, Furukawa Ayumi, Combined subjects 1264 points.

The reference points appear in front of us. These are the results of the previous mid-term exams.

“I see, so that’s why she’s so strong.”

“It’s almost 4000 points. Himeji-san sure is smart.”

Mmm…holed up in a corner, we continue to nod our heads away.

The strength of a summoned beast is equivalent to the points that the owner gets. Since the test summoning system totals up the marks, basically, the higher amount of points a person gets, the stronger the summoned beast will be.

“Speaking of which, don’t Akihisa and Himeji know each other?”

“Mm~ she was my grade school classmate…but we haven’t spoken to each other for years. She should have forgotten about me, right?”

We’re in different classes right now, separated for a long time. If there’s a chance, I’ll definitely want to talk to her, but there’s no real chance for me to talk to any girl from another class. If I’m to go to her class and immediately say “Himeji-san, I got something to say to you”, this will look like a confession no matter what.

“I see, you’ll most likely be streamed into different classes next year. I can you can be erased from Hiemji’s memory.”

“Next year? Are you talking about the streaming exam?”

“Yeah, you definitely won’t be able to be in the same class as her anyway.”

“Now that you mentioned it, that’s right…”

After we entered school, we were streamed into different classes like other schools. But next year, things will be different. We’ll be sorted according to our grades. Though Himeji-san is in class C, when we become second-years, she’ll definitely be sorted into class A with those top grades of hers. If so, me and Yuuji will definitely be unable to be classmates with her since we’re just straddling about in class D anyway.

“I’ll be forgotten by her…this sure feels rather lonely…”

“Yeah, there’s no benefit for her to remember you anyway.”

“How can you say that!”

Just as we’re blankly seeing other classes battle it out and talking away—

“Next! Yoshii Akihisa and Shimada Minami!”

Ironman—let me repeat that again, this is the voice of our homeroom teacher, Nishimura-sensei.

Recovering myself, I find that those before me who were waiting to practice their summoning are all back.

“I’m going then.”

“Go then. You’re a ‘punishment inspector’ candidate anyway, go learn how to control a summoned beast properly.”

“…I say, I’m different from you Yuuji. I’m not some problematic kid!”

I rolled my eyes back at Yuuji. Really, what about being a ‘punishment inspector’? That’s really rude. Aren’t they saying that I’m a problematic student? Why is he calling me this when it’s basically the equivalent of being an idiot?

“Hurry up, Yoshii!!”

“Alright~”

Hearing Ironman roar at me, I hastily increase my pace.

Paying attention, the training partner has already finished her summoning.

“…”

The person stares at the summoned beast in front of her in shock. This girl with an energetic-looking ponytail and attractive long legs is my classmate, Shimada-san. At this moment, she reveals a slight melancholic look that doesn’t fit her. What happened? Why’s she looking so depressed and lethargic? Is her summoned beast even weak and useless than what she thought would be?”

“What’s wrong, Shimada-san? Are you shocked that your summoned beast is so weak?”

After saying this, I see that she seems to be healed by my gentleness. The grey clouds above her are gone, now replaced with a look of delight.

“Ah, so Yoshii’s the opponent. How delightful.”

Shimada-san slightly blushes. Seeing her so happy, I felt happy as well—oh my, to reveal her feelings to me in front of everyone like this, this kid’s really troublesome.”

“Because it’s great to beat up Yoshii.”

…This kid’s really troublesome!

“Shimada-san, the target’s the summoned beast, not us.”

I’m a little worried, so I confirmed the rules with her again. This is the summoning practical that’s meant for the summoning battles next year, so no matter what, this should be a battle between summoned beasts.

“You’re right, we won’t be fighting each other.”

Shimada-san immediately nodded her head in agreement. Great, seems like she understood.

“Since I’ll be the one dishing out the beatdown anyway.”

SEEMS LIKE SHE DIDN’T UNDERSTAND AT ALL!

“That, sensei, what Shimada-san did just now was an act of violence. If you have the time to check our belongings, you should do something about this case of school violence, right?”

“…Shimada, even if the opponent’s Yoshii, violence is bad.”

“But sensei…”

No buts. A no is a no, you understand?”

“…Yes.”

“Really…so you really understand? If so—”

Ironman suddenly reveals a smirk and says,

“—I’ll give you a special discount this time.”

“Eh? Aren’t those words really weird?”

Am I thinking too much? It seemed like a teacher just allowed a case of school violence!

“I’ll do my best!”

“Right, so you must work hard.”

“Ah haha, sensei, Shimada-san, you two are really stupid. Do you think that you two can beat me so easily? If so, I’m going to counter and beat you two—I’M SORRY, IT’S MY FAULT, PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!”

It’s useless even if I apologised.

Don’t tell me…that those cautious words of mine caused this disaster?

<center>☆</center>

“Ho…ever since morning inspection, it’s been one disaster after another today…”

After a day’s worth of lessons, it’s dismissal time. I’m chatting away with those guys who I usually talk to.

“That’s because Akihisa-bro brought so many unnecessary things to school.”

Sitting beside me and showing me a smile is Kinoshita Hideyoshi, who’s in the same class as me, Yuuji and Muttsulini. It’s already weird to hear him speak like an old man, and he has a beauty’s face on him. He really likes to make comments. Even so, I do feel that he’s the most normal person after me, since the other two are so abnormal that words can’t describe them.

“Speaking of which, Hideyoshi didn’t get anything confiscated, right?

“Of course I did, I got some costumes and props confiscated from me. Even though I told sensei that it’s for the drama club, they still got confiscated either way.”

The school has already provided some props and costumes for Hideyoshi, so Hideyoshi himself doesn’t need to bring them. If so, these are unnecessary things. However—

“There’s no need to confiscate them all anyway, he could have given us some leeway. Who expected Ironman’s brain to be so hard.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“His brain’s definitely filled with lead.”

Muttsulini and Yuuji seem to agree with me. This can’t be helped, since they got quite a few things confiscated as well.

And I actually thought that ‘we’re just having summoning practical today, so there’re no lessons; should be rather relaxing today.”

It was supposed to be relaxing, but I guess it’s better to have lessons without the search.

“Summoning practical…”

Hearing my little grumbling, Yuuji muttered to himself.

“Eh? What’s wrong, Yuuji?”

“Nothing. It’s just that I remembered that we have to take part in summoning war next year.”

For some reason, he sure seemed happy when he said this.

Speaking of summoning war, well, it’s about having a summoning battle between classes with the class facilities on the line. If we can move onto second year without any mishaps, we’ll have this summoning war system on us.

“But why must we have this summoning war system? If we want to differentiate the scores clearly, can’t we just stick grades onto everyone?”

“Well, most likely, they prefer a summoning war to tests since it can motivate students, right? As a class, the students will work hard to not drag their classmates down.”

“I see. So they intend to make us work together and improve our grades without breaking us, right?”

“Yeah, this allows the school to do what they want the most, and that’s ‘to groom students who can showcase their real potential in society’.”

“Oh~ Is that so?”

Just as the four of them were chatting away.

“Ah…really, that Yoshii actually left the cleaning work to me. Where did he go off to?”

A certain student can be heard shouting on the corridor. Is that Shimada-san?

“What the heck, Akihisa. You’re in charge of cleaning today?”

“Mm, but I left the cleaning work to Shimada-san and ran off first.”

“Hmm, according to how I see it, you two have quite the relationship.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“Ah haha, it’s not what you think it is.”

“Really. Once I catch him, I’ll tie his limbs up and throw him down the 3rd level!”

That’s a highly difficult stunt even a stuntman will be afraid of.

“Sorry, I don’t think I can protect my own life any longer. I’ll be leaving now!”

Without saying anything else, I grabbed my bag and dashed out of the corridor. I love my life.

“Ah, Yoshii! So you’re hiding here! Hold it right there!”

“I’m not going to wait! You’re going to kill me, right?”

“I’m not angry at all. Just hold on, will you!?”

That’s definitely a lie.

“These two really have rather good feelings.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

She said that she’s not angry, but she’s holding onto a rope for some reason.

<center>☆</center>

“Hoo…that was scary~”

It’s been past 30 minutes since I came running out of school, and before I knew it, I’m on a shopping street.

“Well. I don’t intend to buy anything, so I guess I’ll go back home—hm?”

Just as I intended to head home, I saw a familiar figure walk into a shop. Isn’t that Himeji-san?

“I guess it’s somewhat of a fate for us to meet here. Should I be courageous and call her…”

Though we did study in the same class during elementary school, we were separated into different classes during middle school. Before I knew it, Himeji-san seemed so distant from me. To see her in front of me after so many years, I really want to talk to her—the reason why I feel this way is most likely because of Yuuji’s words ‘She’ll erase you from her memory anyway’.

In order to turn my thoughts into action, I follow Himeji-san closely as I walked into the shop…only to find that there’re so many dolls here, it’s unbelievable. Seems like this is a doll shop that a girl will love the most—what the heck, this shop’s basically a doll shop!

“Well, let’s go back. This shop really doesn’t suit me.”

I immediately hasten my pace and walk towards the exit. Anyway, the most important thing right now is to leave this place.

“This is Hazuki’s only request of this lifetime. Please, uncle!”

“Even if you say that, I have to do business, you know…”

The moment I reached the exit, I suddenly heard this conversation. It seemed like a girl’s standing at the counter and telling the cashier something. She seems rather insistent on this. What’s going on?

I felt a bit mindful, so I turn my head to where the voice came from. As I expected, it’s a cashier uncle and a girl who looks like she’s in elementary school.

“I want to get that big Noi doll no matter what. Please, I beg you!”

“Even if you ask me like this…we’re doing business. Wouldn’t it be unfair to the other customers if I give you a little discount? We shopkeepers do have to treat all customers equally.”

“Even so, please!”

“Uuu…really can’t handle you…”

The cashier uncle looked rather troubled as he said this and scratches his face. The girl however continued to beg earnestly. Seeing such a small girl beg like this, I’ll be seen as really cruel if I’m to walk away like this…

“Hey, little girl, why do you want this doll?”

I know that I’m too nosey, but I still ended up getting involved.

Now that a 3rd party has suddenly appeared, the little girl and the uncle revealed a surprised look on their faces.

“Be, because onee-chan didn’t look too good recently. I wanted to buy the doll that she always wanted to hopefully motivate her…”

“Not looking good?”

“Most likely, because she just came back from Germany and couldn’t understand Japanese well!

Shifted houses…even if it’s within Japanese land, anyone will feel lonely when the friends and environment changes, let alone coming back to Japan.

“Even then, onee-chan took over mommy and daddy and did all the housework like sweeping and washing clothes nicely, and often play together with Hazuki…”

Seemed like it hit her sore spot as Hazuki-chan’s wide eyes start to tear up.

“Waa! Don, don’t cry! Nii-san will help you out here!”

“…Really?”

“Mm, really.”

“…Thank you, onii-chan!”

Wiping away the tears, Hazuki-chan reveals a delightful smile.

“Speaking of which, how much does this doll cost?”

The doll in Hazuki-chan’s arms is about 1m tall. If I make a rough estimate, I don’t think 5,000 yen’s going to be enough.

“Including tax, it’ll be a total of 24,800 yen.”

“Sorry, nii-san already tried, but he can’t do it.”

“Onii-chan?”

Hazuki-chan looks rather sad.

Argh! Didn’t expect one to be that expensive. Under these conditions, the declaration of surrender came out of my mouth without thinking through.

“Then how much does Hazuki-chan has?”

“I only have 10,000yen…”

So we’re missing 15,000. Including my entire fortune, there’s only 11,699 yen. We can’t even hitting the price of 24,800 yen! The most we can pay is half.

“Excuse me, can you sell this doll to us at 11,699 yen?”

“Eh, I just said before that that we’re doing a business here…”

The reply’s still the same.

“Onii-chan, this isn’t any different from before.”

Hazuki-chan whispered to my ear.

She’s right. Up till now, I’ve been doing the same thing as what Hazuki-chan’s been doing. However, things will be different from now on. I’m not an elementary school student; let’s show her how an adult (high school student) does things!

“We have only 11,699 yen in total, that’s about half the price of the doll, right?”

“Ya. That’s still not quite enough.”

“Hazuki-chan wants this doll, and uncle wants to sell this to her, but you’re unwilling to sell it to her at half price. If so, I have a great idea!”

“Hm? What is it?”

“We can rip the doll in half and sell the right side to—eh? What? Why are you two seeing me as an idiot?”

“…Are you really a high school student?”

“…Onii-chan’s an idiot!”

I, I actually got called stupid by an elementary school kid!

“I can’t give you a discount, but I can guarantee that I won’t sell this doll away for the time being. You can go back to discuss with your parents first.”

Making this conclusion, the uncle ended the conversation just like this.

“Can’t you ask your parents to buy it for you, Hazuki-chan?”

Having walked out of the shop, we came to the park to discuss our plans.

“Mommy and daddy aren’t normally at home…so they would leave the money to one-chan. If I want to buy something, onee-chan will definitely ask for a reason…”

“I see, uu~”

Wanting to do something for her beloved older sister—Hazuki-chan’s heart’s ever so glamorous, it’s way different from my family who sent me to Fumitzuki Gakuen on the excuse of ‘not wanting to waste school fees’. I must help Hazuki-chan in order to prevent her from losing this intimacy with her family.

But speaking of which, what should I do? It’ll be good if I have some more money, but my money’s about to be used it…

“Oh ya! Hazuki can get money if she sells her manga to a second-hand shop, right?”

Hazuki-chan thought of this brilliant plan as her eyes sparkle. It’s true that we can get money just like this, but I think that she can’t get so much anyway. Of course, it’s a different case altogether if I have those handheld games that were confiscated this morning—

“Hm? Oh ya, there’s this plan after all!”

“…Onii-chan, have you thought of something?”

“I can’t possibly get it back it my hands anyway. If I’m successful, we may be able to get enough money to buy the doll…”

Though I don’t think it can work…mm! It’s still worth a try though.

“Okay! Hazuki-chan, can you come back to the park tomorrow?”

“Y, yes. I can come over…”

“Then we’ll meet here tomorrow. It’s getting dark now, let’s go home.”

I waved my hands and said goodbye to Hazuki-chan. Anyway, I got to discuss it with Yuuji and the rest tomorrow.

“Ah, mm, bye bye…”

Speaking of which, did Himeji-san really enter that shop?

<center>☆</center>

“So you want to take back those confiscated items?”

The next morning, in the same classroom, I talked to the trio as per usual.

“I do feel that it’s a pity to leave those things that got confiscated yesterday, but…”

“Uu~mm…ya, but the opponent’s that Ironman. We may be designated as ‘Punishment Inspectors’ if we’re not careful…”

Yuuji and Hideyoshi lower their chin and ponder. Seems like they don’t intend to help me. This is bad, looks like I have to deal with this on my own.

“…I approve of Akihisa’s proposal.”

“Eh? Muttsulini? You’re willing to help me?”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

Great! Now at least I have someone who specializes in stealth helping me out.

“…Never mind, let’s give it a go.”

“Ah? So Yuuji’s okay with it?”

“Yeah. I just bought that MP3 recently, and I accumulated quite a debt to Ironman, so let’s settle this once and for all.”

Yuuji smirked. What an enthusiastic bad guy’s face.

“If so, I’ll help out as well. If I can get back those things, I don’t want to give up as well.”

In the end, even Hideyoshi nodded his head, and everyone decided to take part in this. As expected of the group problematic first-years.

“Right now, the most important thing is to investigate where our targets are.”

“That’s right. If we don’t even know where Ironman hid those confiscated items, we can’t possibly get them back even if we want to.”

The confiscated items may have ended up being abandoned, but they were just confiscated yesterday, so Ironman should still have them with him.

“That’s the case. Akihisa, remove the silence function of the phone.”

“Eh? Why?”

“Don’t ask too much, just do it. You want those confiscated items back, right?”

“…I’m not really sure what’s going on, but I just need to remove the silence function, right?”

“That’s right.”

The phone can’t possibly ring during lesson time, there shouldn’t be any problems, right? Let’s just follow what Yuuji told me to do.

I pull my handphone out from my pocket and took it out of silent mode.

“Oi, you people better hurry up and sit down. I’m going to start taking attendance.”

Seeing our homeroom teacher Ironman walk into the classroom, I immediately slip the handphone back into my pocket.

“Alright, let’s begin.”

Thus, our battle for the confiscated items officially begins now.

“Shimada.”

“Here.”

“Shimizu.”

“Here.”

At the usual time of taking attendance, Ironman’s coarse voice echoes clearly throughout the classroom.

“Yamaguchi.”

“Here.”

“Watanabe.”

“Here.”

—Beep beep beep.

Suddenly, a beep interrupted the class while attendance is taken. Whose phone is it? Really, do think that we have such a stupid person in class. The phone will definitely get confiscated when it rings in class.

“…Yoshii, hand over your phone.”

“…Yes.”

The problem is, this stupid person was me.

Damn it! Why must it ring at this moment!? Who called me!?

<<Missed call: Sakamoto Yuuji>>

“Yu, Yuuji, you betrayed me!”

“I’ll consficate the handphone then.”

“Ahh! Handphone! MY HANDPHONE!”

My handphone got taken away by Ironman mercilessly.

“Very good. Nobody’s came late nor skipped classes. I hope that all students will continue to keep this up.”

After taking the attendance, Ironman moves his heavy feet out of the classroom—together with my handphone.

“Very good. Part 1 of the plan is complete.”

“Yuuji! What sort of grudge do you have against me! Now my handphone got confiscated by Ironman all because of you!”

“This is a bait meant to fish out where our targets are. We just need to take them back.”

“Eh? Bait?”

“That’s right. I deliberately allowed Ironman to confiscate your handphone in order to find out where Ironman hid those items.”

“Why didn’t you tell me in the first place…”

And if possible, I hope that you can use your handphone as bait.

“…I’m back.”

“WAHH!”

Suddenly talking right behind me. You scared me~

“Oh, Muttsulini came back already. How was it?”

“…Those confiscated items are placed in the staff storage cupboard.”

“As expected of Muttsulini, erasing your own presence to tail people, that truly is your specialty. I’m impressed.”

Seems like Muttsulini went to tail Ironman and investigate where my handphone was hidden. If it’s tailing others without attracting attention, Yuuji can’t do it, and Hideyoshi doesn’t have the skills.

“…But the cupboard’s locked.”

“Okay. So where’s the key?”

“…In the rear left pocket of Ironman’s pants.”

“I see. If so, we have to snatch the ket from him.”

“Ya, but how are we going to do that?”

“No problems. I got a good idea. We’ll take action during cleaning time.”

Anyway, let's attend lessons and wait for school dismissal.

<center>☆</center>

It's finally dismissal time.

“So, what plan do you have?”

As I tried to sneak out yesterday, I was punished to sweep the entire corridor alone. Thus, I'm discussing the plan with Yuuji and the rest while twisting the mop around. These damned guys don't have any intentions of helping out in the first place.

“We'll be using that.”

Yuuji lifts his chin and points.

“A pail? What are we going to do with that?”

“We're going to use that to splash water on Ironman and make him take off his clothes.”

I see. If so, we can then take his clothes away and take the key to the cupboard,

“Mm hm~ this method is simple and easy to succeed.”

Hideyoshi's right. We can't possibly fail. Basically, there's only the last problem to this plan, and that is—whoever going to splash the water on Ironman will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.

“There's only one problem in this plan, and that's the one who's going to splash the water, 'Akihisa' will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.”

Hold on! Is it decided that I'll be the one in charge of doing this?

“However, that's not really a huge problem.”

THAT'S A HUGE PROBLEM TO ME!

“Oi, isn't that too strange? Let's settle this with rock paper scissors!”

“Ooh, look! Me and our target's already here.”

“Very good. You got to do your best, Akihisa!”

“...Do your best.”

“Eh? Hold on!”

The trio already wordlessly retreated back in the shortest time possible.

Ironman has already climbed up the stairs. If so, I can only do this!

My eyes have already captured the target, and the relative speed was estimated. The prepared weapon's in my hand, everything's okay—time to attack!

“WAAHH! I SLIPPED!”

Dragging the mop, I deliberately fell forward by letting my feet stagger and aim the pail at Ironman, who's on the stairs. GET WET!

“GUAH!”

How, how is it possible! As expected of Ironman! To be able to suddenly react in the blink of an eye and dodge the splash thanks to his superhuman senses! However—

“WHERE ARE YOU ESCAPING TO!?”

I drag the mop in my hand to where Ironman dodged to. I won't admit defeat so easily!

Phoosh, Clak cak cak.

The water from the pail drenched Ironman, and the pail rolls asie. Mission accomplished.

I pick up the pail and mop that I threw out as I remain mindful not to step on the puddle of water, saying to a stunned Ironman “Sorry, I slipped—AHH, sensei! An encyclopaedia isn't to be used as a weapon!”

“I thought I just heard you say 'Where are you escaping to', didn't I?”

“That's just a hallucination.”

“Stop trying to lie to me with such a serious look on your face. Get ready to die!”

“Sen, sensei, please don't use the edge of the encyclopaedia!”

Where are you guys now! Come save me! I'll definitely be beaten down by Ironman into a panda if this keeps up!

“Ahh, Akihisa, you really ended up doing it.”

Yuuji and the rest appeared out of nowhere. Anyway, I'm saved~

“I told you so many times 'not to splash water onto sensei'...”

“Ow, OWW! SENSEI! I SAID THAT I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE ALREADY!”

They, they didn't help out at all! These damned guys! Are they intending to sit around and watch?

“Sensei, punish Akihisa later. I guess you better change your clothes. If you don't mind, I'll lend my P.E. attire to you.”

“That's right. Sorry, then lend me that. Yoshii, stay behind and scrub the floor clean!”

Leaving these words behind, Ironman, who was drenched by me, head off to the classroom with Yuuji and the rest to change clothes.

“...So unfortunate.”

Anyway, I remained behind to clean the floor up. Besides, I have the cleaning tools in my hand.

Just as I'm working hard to wipe the water off the floor, Hideyoshi walks out of the classroom and moves towards me.

“I got the key, Akihisa.”

“Really? Then we just need to enter the staffroom and get back the confiscated items.”

“Umm, let's hurry up before Ironman realizes it.”

“Got it!”

After letting the mop lean against the wall, Hideyoshi and I quickly head towards the staffroom.

“I'm going in then.”

I took the cupboard key from Hideyoshi's hands and reach my hand out for the door.

“There’s no problem, right?”

“No need to worry. I’ll try my best to walk into the staffroom without raising too much attention and get those things back.”

I should be just an ordinary student to every teacher, except for Ironman. I should be more suited for this role as compared to Hideyoshi, who has the look of a beauty.

“Really? Then I’ll just wait here for your good news.”

“Mm, I’m going in then~ ‘cuse me~”

I open the staffroom door slightly. No problem, I’m not some irritating guy.

“Yoshii? Hurry up and get over here!”

“Why!? Why am I noticed so soon after entering the room!?”

I got caught by the Ancient Literature teacher immediately after entering the room. Why?

“I want to hear what excuse you have regarding the essay ‘translate the Tsurezuregusa[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#] into Modern Language’!”

“Ah, I did hand in my homework properly.”

“I’m asking why did you turn the Tsurezuregusa into a rap!?”

“Eh? But sensei wanted it to be translated into the modern language, and speaking of modern Japanese, isn’t it—”

“Ah, Yoshii-kun, remember to come over here after you’re done there.”

“Yoshii, that Chemistry report you handed in was too ridiculous! Come over and explain it to me later.”

Unknowingly, I got surrounded by several teachers. Well, if this is the case, forget about completing the plan, I’ll be hounded by these teachers till night! Got to find a way to get away from them!

“Excuse me…”

Just as I’m pondering on what to do, someone else entered the staffroom. Hm? Isn’t that Hideyoshi?

"Ooh, isn’t that Kinoshita? What’s wrong?”

“I, I suddenly…don’t feel too good…but the health teacher isn’t…in…”

Hideyoshi cupped his mouth. He really doesn’t look too good. Is he sick?

“Hideyoshi, are you—”

I frantically rushed towards him. At this moment, he suddenly blinked at me. I see, so he’s acting! As expected of someone from the drama club, I nearly got fooled.

“Sorry, but can I rest here—”

Before finishing, Hideyoshi collapsed onto the floor.

“Ki, Kinoshita! Are you alright?”

“Anyway, let’s take him to the sickbay!”

“You, you’re right! Sensei, please carry his legs!”

A few teachers start to create quite the ruckus. After that, everyone in the staffroom left to accompany Hideyoshi to the sick bay. Brilliantly done, Hideyoshi!

“Let’s use this opportunity to get back those confiscated items. Let me see, Ironman…no wait, it’s Nishimura. Nishimura’s…”

I checked the nametag on the cupboards which are according to order. Oh, found it. It’s this one.

“…Speaking of which, I somehow imagined that bugs will crawl out of Ironman’s cupboard.”

Though I’m a bit fearful, I have no time to hesitate. I pull out the key Hideyoshi handed to me and pull the door handle down, opening the metal cupboard effortlessly.

“Oh, it’s unexpectedly clean…”

The cupboard’s arranged rather neatly, and the bag of confiscated goods are placed in an obvious place.

“Let’s get out of here before someone notices—hm?”

Just as I was about to lock the cupboard up and run away, I noticed a pile of old books tied up in raffia strings. Should be meant for throwing away.

“Uu~hm…since he’s going to throw it, I might as well take it. Maybe I can get some money as well.”

After grabbing the books with both hands, I immediately dashed out of the staffroom.

“Okay! At least we achieved our goal!”

After what happened just now, I brought the spoils—the bag of confiscated items back to Yuuji, only taking away my own stuff and the pile of old books. I then took them over to a second-hand shop to exchange these spoils for cash.

My handheld games and gaming software garnered a price lower than what I expected, while that pile of books got quite the price; what a nice mistake in estimation. I really got to thank Ironman for this.

“Let me see, is that girl here~”

“Ah! Onii-chan! You're here!”

Hazuki-chan immediately came running over to me the moment I approached the park. She really looked like a cute puppy, and that even warms my heart. Maybe it's because I'm often surrounded by idiots, Ironman and a violent girl...

“Mm, because we arranged to meet each other. Oh yeah, where did you get that doll from?”

Looking closely, Hazuki-chan's hugging something similar to the Noi doll that she wanted to buy (is that what it's called?). It looks as if it was sewn by hand.

“There was a pretty onee-chan who came over and said to me 'If that onii-chan couldn't succeed, then give this to your sister!' and handed it over to me!”

“?”
“And she also said 'If that onii-chan managed to buy the doll, i'll give this doll to you.'.”

The kid's lac of order in her speech confused me.

Erm, let me straighten Hazuki-chan's words out—

—A pretty onee-chan came to Hazuki-chan today.

—And then, she handed this handmade doll over to Hazuki-chan

—This pretty onee-chan even said that if I couldn't do it, she'll give this doll to Hazuki-chan's sister as a gift.

—But if I succeeded, this doll will go to Hazuki-chan.

—So that's how it is.

“Mmm, is that so? Then this doll will go to hazuki-chan.”

“Eh/ Really?”

“Yeah. And this doll will go to Hazuki-chan's sister.”

I hand over the large doll in my hand over to Hazuki-chan. It should be tough for her petite body to carry such a large doll, but she still received it delightedly.

“This is great! Thank you, onii-chan!”
“No problems. It'll be great if your sister can cheer up.”

I patted her head. Hazuki-chan seems to enjoy it as she slowly closes her eyes.

“Uu~ Ah, that's right! Onii-chan, can you lend me your ear?”

“Eh? What is it? Are you going to say a secret to me or something?”

“don't ask, just lend me your ear.”

Is she about to thank me? I'm really touched. One can't become a proper adult if the person can't even say 'thank you' or 'sorry'.

“Okay, what is it?”

I bent over to match her height, but unexpectedly—

“Thank you, onii-chan♪”

Whoosh! A cute sensation passes my face. Eh? This...don't tell me this is...

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 043.jpg|thumb]]

“Wha, wha, wha...”

“Onii-chan may be an idiot, but he's so gentle! Hazuki-cahn loves you! When I grow up, I'll let you become my husband!”

Without waiting for me to reply, Hazuki-chan skips out of the park.

Re, recently, these elementary school students are...

I touched my face with my hand, seemingly wanting to wipe away the soft sensation that's left on the face. Even without looking at the mirror, I know my face is red. How, how embarrassing...she's just an elementary school kid...

“Hoo...time for me to go back as well...”

After lifting my bag up and slinging it over my back, I head off towards the exit of the park. While exiting, I see a familiar figure yesterday. That person is—

“Excuse me...are you Himeji-san?”

“Ah, yes, what is it—YO, YOSHII-KUN!”

So it's Himeji-san. It sure is hard to find another pretty girl. I can't possibly be mistaken.

“Sorry, I seemed to have scared you.”

“No, no worries. I was just dazed...”

Our conversation got interrupted just like that. This, this is really awkward...what should I say to a friend who I haven't met for a long time?

“Erm, that...it's really a coincidence that we met her. Did you just finish class? But you look rather tired here, are you?”

“Yes,because I stayed up all night...”

“Hei~so Himeji-san would also stay up.”

The impression she gives is that she lives her life normally, but it's unexpected that she would stay up.

“That's not it, I just stayed up last night, because I got something I have to do no matter what...”

She inadvertently yawned as she continued to talk. Himeji-san sure is cute when she lets out some tears due to sleepiness.

“Then, I'll be going off in this direction, goodbye.”

Ah, mm, byebye.”

I waved my hand to Himeji-san, who bowed to me courteously.

While walking home, I just realized—oh ya, why did Himeji-san appear in such a place?

<center>☆</center>

“...There was a case of theft in the staffroom room.”

The next morning, during self-study period, Ironman suddenly mentioned this. He's definitely referring to the bag of confiscated items that we got yesterday.

“Such a tragedy worth being angry over, don't you think so, Yoshii?”

He actually threw this question at me. As expected of Ironman, he must have realized that I was the perpetrator, but who will follow you obediently?

“Yeah, sure is worth sighing over.”

I naturally replied with these few words. No problems, I got everything under control.

“Really? Speaking of which, that culprit even took sensei's books.”

Hm? Books? Is he referring to that bundle of books? Wasn't he going to throw them away?

“And that culprit actually had the guts to use his own identity to sell my books to a second-hand shop.”

“Is that so, he sure has guts.”

“Yeah, hahahaha!”

“Ahhahaha...”

Ironman and I started laughing with all enthusiasm. Really, we're laughing with all sorts of happiness—at least it lookde that way if not for those eyes.

“YOSHII! GET READY TO DIE!!!”

“So, sorry! Who knew that it was sensei's collection, I didn't—”

“Are you saying that you didn't even think of it?”

“No, I did think about it, but then I thought 'since its Ironman's, it doesn't matter~'! OW! OUCH! SENSEI! MY SKULLCAP GOT SMASHED IN MY YOU!”

“So you idiot has the highest suspicion. Looks like I have to be even more careful and watch you.”

“Sensei! I'm feeling that I've been watched by you all this time, there's no way for you to watch me further!”

“No, there still is, right? I got a really precious title of honor that's suitable for you—“

“Eh, this is...”

“Everyone at the staff meeting this morning have all agreed, so accept this. This is a present that sensei's handing you.”

From who knows when, Ironman suddenly has a piece of paper in his hand. This plain white paper has only a single line on it.

—Yoshii Akihisa.

The above mentioned has been designed as the 'Punishment Inspector' of Fumitzuki Gakuen.

<center>☆</center>

“Onee-chan!”

Hm? Hazuki, what's up?”

“Well, this is for onee-chan!”

“Eh? Isn't this the Noi doll that I always wanted? How did you...”

“Because onee-chan looked so lethargic. Hazuki prepared it for onee-chan to cheer onee-chan up!”

“Hazuki...really, you...thank you, onee-chan's really happy!”

“Schoolwork may be tough, but you must work hard, Minami nee-chan!”

“Hm, I'll do my best! I'll feel like I lost if I continue to mess around like this. And also...”

“And also what?”

“i'm mindful of someone in school.”

“Eh? Onee-chan's mindful of someone? Who is it? How is that person like?”

“Well~as repayment of the Noi doll, I'll only say this to Hazuki. That person is in the same class as me, and he's one huge idiot~”

<noinclude>
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|-
| Back to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Novel Illustrations|Novel Illustrations]]
| Return to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Fumizuki News|Fumizuki News (An interview with Yoshii Akihisa from Class 2-F)]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3.5 Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～

2011-04-20T15:00:41Z

Caolsei:

==Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～==

'''Please fill in the correct name of the historical person in the blank below.'''

The person who instituted the rakuichi rakuza and abolished monopolies to promote business and economic growth is ______.

'''Himeji Mizuki’s answer:'''

“Oda Nobunaga”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Correct answer.

'''Shimada Minami’s answer:'''

“Chonmage”[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#]

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Gotten used to Japan already? Sensei’s a bit worried on seeing your answer.

'''Yoshii Akihisa’s answer:'''

“Nobu”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

You’re very familiar with him, aren't you?

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 007.jpg|thumb]]

After we shifted here, onee-chan seemed to be a lot more lethargic.

Is it because she’s being bullied at school? Or is it that there’s someone she finds irritating?

But then again, every time onee-chan talked about those classmates, it sounded really interesting. Onee-chan also seemed like she really likes them…

If so, why’s onee-chan so lethargic?

Is it because of school work? Onee-chan did say before the she has some difficulty.

I hope the onee-chan can recover soon.

It’s going to be onee-chan’s birthday, would onee-chan be motivated if I give her a huge plushie? Onee-chan always loved dolls after all.

Mm, let’s do that! I’ll buy a big big Noi doll for onee-chan to cheer her up!

…I wonder if I have enough pocket money?

<center>☆</center>

“EVERYONE FREEZE! PUT YOUR BAGS ON THE TABLE AND LET ME SEE WHAT YOU BROUGHT TO SCHOOL!”

Just right after morning self-study period started, the homeroom teacher in charge of our class, Iron—I’ll try that again, Nishimura-sensei, who’s in charge of our class, suddenly declared this without warning.

Argh! Not good! I brought nothing that’s related to attending lessons at all!

—Should I carry my bag and run away at the fastest speed I can?

For that moment, that idea appeared in my mind.

“Let me tell you beforehand, don’t ever think of running away!”

It’s a difficult task to run away from this homeroom teacher. Besides, this guy’s a brawny teacher with the moniker ‘ironman’. No matter how we try to run, he’ll use this body that’s trained for an ‘Ironman’ triathlon to pursue us relentlessly.

“Alright, I’m going to start checking. If there’s anything unrelated to attending lessons, I will confiscate them without leaving anything.”

Starting from the first row near the corridor, Ironman startst to check the contents of all the bags one by one and confiscate the poker cards and magazines that each person brought.

“Sakamoto, let me see what’s inside your pocket.”

Among us, one of the students has not only his bag, even his pockets are to be checked.

“…Damn it.”

Sakamoto Yuuji makes a sound in agony—he’s my best worst friend.

However, he still obediently rummages through his pocket and pulls out an MP3.

“As expected. I’ll be confiscating this.”

After saying this, Ironman puts Yuuji’s MP3 into his confiscation pouch. Yuuji, who never expected his pocket to be search through, glares at Ironman defiantly.

(This is a disaster, isn’t it, Yuuji?)

I whispered to Yuuji’s ear.

(Really a disaster. Would they normally check pockets? I’m the only one who got my pockets checked!)

(Can’t be helped. Who asked Yuuji to be such a bad person?)

(…Go to hell!)

Looking closely, it seems like Ironman’s method of checking will change according to the student. He’ll only ask the well-behaved students to open their bags and briefly look through their bags once. But for the ill-behaved students, he’ll check thoroughly, even including the inside bags of the bag.

“You’re next, Yoshii Akihisa.”

“Ah, yes.”

Ironman arrives in front of me. Even though I don’t think that he’ll ask me to rummage through my pockets like Yuuji—

“Take off your uniform first, and change into your P.E. attire.”

“Eh? Aren’t you being too wary?”

This level of trust far exceeds what I imagined.

“Well…Nishimura-sensei, for me to change in front of the girls, it’s a bit…”

“That won’t do. you may be hiding some prohibited item in your trousers, so take them out.”

“How can you do this! Even if it’s me, I can’t possibly go to that extent! You should at least trust me—”

Just as I agitatedly approached sensei, ‘CLACK!’, something seemed to drop out from the leg of my trousers.

“Oi, Akihisa, your NDS dropped out.”

I received the handheld gaming console that Yuuji nicely helped me picked up, and after saying thanks, I again face sensei.

“Sensei, believe in me, will you?”

“Forget about wearing P.E. attire.”

How, how is this possible! He’s actually even more wary now!

“You actually brought gaming consoles, manga, light novels, DVD…what one earth are you treating school as?”

My precious stuff are confiscated away, one by one. Speaking of which, why did he do a spot-check when I brought so many things out? The value of those confiscated items may total up to be tens of thousands yen.

“Are these all? I said before, the school is a place for you to learn knowledge, you are not allowed to bring anything unrelated to school.”

After searching, Ironman carried the confiscated items back to the podium. I won’t be able to see my precious again…

“Alright, since you people brought all these along, morning self-study will be cancelled. The first lesson will be ‘summoning practical’, all students are to immediately rush over to the gym.”

After saying this, Ironman carries all the confiscated items and leaves the classroom.

<center>☆</center>

“—Summon!”

Hearing the summoning call echo throughout the gym, I say to Yuuji, who’s beside me.

“…It’s only early morning and we’re already so unlucky.”

“Yeah, that MP3 I bought last month actually got confiscated, damn it.”

“Wah, that’s not too long ago.”

“That one was expensive, you know!”

Yuuji’s wild looking face shrivels with sadness as he continues to complain. I can understand~~this feeling.”

“Akihisa, you got your handheld games confiscated as well, right? There’s quite a few of them.”

“Mm…the total value should be over 30,000 yen.”

Handheld games, game software, DVDs and CDs; totaling up the value of all the confiscated items, the number 1 this time should be either me or Muttsulini. How unlucky…”

“Next, Himeji Mizuki, please step forward.”

“Ye, yes.”

“Oh, it’s Himeji now? Rare for her to wear a P.E. attire. Muttsulini, is it really alright not to take photos of her?”

“…My camera got confiscated.”

“I see, quite the pity. We’re in different classes, so it’s rare to see Himeji-san in a P.E. attire.”

“There’s only this one summoning practical.”

“…(Lowers head dejectedly).”

Muttsulini’s so depressed that he can’t even lift his head up. Sigh, this can’t be helped anyway.

Silky and smooth long hair, and cute and innocent look, an ample chest that seems to be self-aware and supports the uniform; Even if it’s not Muttsulini, any guy will want to take a photo of her pretty figure; I know that I definitely want to.

“Is, is this how you do it? Summon!”

Himeji-san doesn’t really seem confident as she mutters. A geometrical magic array appears beside her feet, and Himeji-san’s summoned beast appears in front of everyone.

“As expect of Himeji, her summoned beast sure looks impressive…”

“Yeah, and cute too.”

Himeji-san’s summoned beast looks really cute. Since a summoned beast is basically formed from the caster’s appearance, and since the caster’s already so cute looking, there’s no need to emphasize it further.

But speaking of which, what makes her summoned beast so impressive—

“Most likely, nobody else will be able to wield such a terrifyingly huge sword.”

“Yeah, only Himeji-san is able to do that.”

Her summoned beast is wielding a Western longsword that’s several times longer than her height, and she’s lifting it effortlessly. Anyone can tell that this summoned beast isn’t to be underestimated.

Class C, Himeji Mizuki, Combined subjects 3943 points.

Vs

Class C, Furukawa Ayumi, Combined subjects 1264 points.

The reference points appear in front of us. These are the results of the previous mid-term exams.

“I see, so that’s why she’s so strong.”

“It’s almost 4000 points. Himeji-san sure is smart.”

Mmm…holed up in a corner, we continue to nod our heads away.

The strength of a summoned beast is equivalent to the points that the owner gets. Since the test summoning system totals up the marks, basically, the higher amount of points a person gets, the stronger the summoned beast will be.

“Speaking of which, don’t Akihisa and Himeji know each other?”

“Mm~ she was my grade school classmate…but we haven’t spoken to each other for years. She should have forgotten about me, right?”

We’re in different classes right now, separated for a long time. If there’s a chance, I’ll definitely want to talk to her, but there’s no real chance for me to talk to any girl from another class. If I’m to go to her class and immediately say “Himeji-san, I got something to say to you”, this will look like a confession no matter what.

“I see, you’ll most likely be streamed into different classes next year. I can you can be erased from Hiemji’s memory.”

“Next year? Are you talking about the streaming exam?”

“Yeah, you definitely won’t be able to be in the same class as her anyway.”

“Now that you mentioned it, that’s right…”

After we entered school, we were streamed into different classes like other schools. But next year, things will be different. We’ll be sorted according to our grades. Though Himeji-san is in class C, when we become second-years, she’ll definitely be sorted into class A with those top grades of hers. If so, me and Yuuji will definitely be unable to be classmates with her since we’re just straddling about in class D anyway.

“I’ll be forgotten by her…this sure feels rather lonely…”

“Yeah, there’s no benefit for her to remember you anyway.”

“How can you say that!”

Just as we’re blankly seeing other classes battle it out and talking away—

“Next! Yoshii Akihisa and Shimada Minami!”

Ironman—let me repeat that again, this is the voice of our homeroom teacher, Nishimura-sensei.

Recovering myself, I find that those before me who were waiting to practice their summoning are all back.

“I’m going then.”

“Go then. You’re a ‘punishment inspector’ candidate anyway, go learn how to control a summoned beast properly.”

“…I say, I’m different from you Yuuji. I’m not some problematic kid!”

I rolled my eyes back at Yuuji. Really, what about being a ‘punishment inspector’? That’s really rude. Aren’t they saying that I’m a problematic student? Why is he calling me this when it’s basically the equivalent of being an idiot?

“Hurry up, Yoshii!!”

“Alright~”

Hearing Ironman roar at me, I hastily increase my pace.

Paying attention, the training partner has already finished her summoning.

“…”

The person stares at the summoned beast in front of her in shock. This girl with an energetic-looking ponytail and attractive long legs is my classmate, Shimada-san. At this moment, she reveals a slight melancholic look that doesn’t fit her. What happened? Why’s she looking so depressed and lethargic? Is her summoned beast even weak and useless than what she thought would be?”

“What’s wrong, Shimada-san? Are you shocked that your summoned beast is so weak?”

After saying this, I see that she seems to be healed by my gentleness. The grey clouds above her are gone, now replaced with a look of delight.

“Ah, so Yoshii’s the opponent. How delightful.”

Shimada-san slightly blushes. Seeing her so happy, I felt happy as well—oh my, to reveal her feelings to me in front of everyone like this, this kid’s really troublesome.”

“Because it’s great to beat up Yoshii.”

…This kid’s really troublesome!

“Shimada-san, the target’s the summoned beast, not us.”

I’m a little worried, so I confirmed the rules with her again. This is the summoning practical that’s meant for the summoning battles next year, so no matter what, this should be a battle between summoned beasts.

“You’re right, we won’t be fighting each other.”

Shimada-san immediately nodded her head in agreement. Great, seems like she understood.

“Since I’ll be the one dishing out the beatdown anyway.”

SEEMS LIKE SHE DIDN’T UNDERSTAND AT ALL!

“That, sensei, what Shimada-san did just now was an act of violence. If you have the time to check our belongings, you should do something about this case of school violence, right?”

“…Shimada, even if the opponent’s Yoshii, violence is bad.”

“But sensei…”

No buts. A no is a no, you understand?”

“…Yes.”

“Really…so you really understand? If so—”

Ironman suddenly reveals a smirk and says,

“—I’ll give you a special discount this time.”

“Eh? Aren’t those words really weird?”

Am I thinking too much? It seemed like a teacher just allowed a case of school violence!

“I’ll do my best!”

“Right, so you must work hard.”

“Ah haha, sensei, Shimada-san, you two are really stupid. Do you think that you two can beat me so easily? If so, I’m going to counter and beat you two—I’M SORRY, IT’S MY FAULT, PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!”

It’s useless even if I apologised.

Don’t tell me…that those cautious words of mine caused this disaster?

<center>☆</center>

“Ho…ever since morning inspection, it’s been one disaster after another today…”

After a day’s worth of lessons, it’s dismissal time. I’m chatting away with those guys who I usually talk to.

“That’s because Akihisa-bro brought so many unnecessary things to school.”

Sitting beside me and showing me a smile is Kinoshita Hideyoshi, who’s in the same class as me, Yuuji and Muttsulini. It’s already weird to hear him speak like an old man, and he has a beauty’s face on him. He really likes to make comments. Even so, I do feel that he’s the most normal person after me, since the other two are so abnormal that words can’t describe them.

“Speaking of which, Hideyoshi didn’t get anything confiscated, right?

“Of course I did, I got some costumes and props confiscated from me. Even though I told sensei that it’s for the drama club, they still got confiscated either way.”

The school has already provided some props and costumes for Hideyoshi, so Hideyoshi himself doesn’t need to bring them. If so, these are unnecessary things. However—

“There’s no need to confiscate them all anyway, he could have given us some leeway. Who expected Ironman’s brain to be so hard.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“His brain’s definitely filled with lead.”

Muttsulini and Yuuji seem to agree with me. This can’t be helped, since they got quite a few things confiscated as well.

And I actually thought that ‘we’re just having summoning practical today, so there’re no lessons; should be rather relaxing today.”

It was supposed to be relaxing, but I guess it’s better to have lessons without the search.

“Summoning practical…”

Hearing my little grumbling, Yuuji muttered to himself.

“Eh? What’s wrong, Yuuji?”

“Nothing. It’s just that I remembered that we have to take part in summoning war next year.”

For some reason, he sure seemed happy when he said this.

Speaking of summoning war, well, it’s about having a summoning battle between classes with the class facilities on the line. If we can move onto second year without any mishaps, we’ll have this summoning war system on us.

“But why must we have this summoning war system? If we want to differentiate the scores clearly, can’t we just stick grades onto everyone?”

“Well, most likely, they prefer a summoning war to tests since it can motivate students, right? As a class, the students will work hard to not drag their classmates down.”

“I see. So they intend to make us work together and improve our grades without breaking us, right?”

“Yeah, this allows the school to do what they want the most, and that’s ‘to groom students who can showcase their real potential in society’.”

“Oh~ Is that so?”

Just as the four of them were chatting away.

“Ah…really, that Yoshii actually left the cleaning work to me. Where did he go off to?”

A certain student can be heard shouting on the corridor. Is that Shimada-san?

“What the heck, Akihisa. You’re in charge of cleaning today?”

“Mm, but I left the cleaning work to Shimada-san and ran off first.”

“Hmm, according to how I see it, you two have quite the relationship.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“Ah haha, it’s not what you think it is.”

“Really. Once I catch him, I’ll tie his limbs up and throw him down the 3rd level!”

That’s a highly difficult stunt even a stuntman will be afraid of.

“Sorry, I don’t think I can protect my own life any longer. I’ll be leaving now!”

Without saying anything else, I grabbed my bag and dashed out of the corridor. I love my life.

“Ah, Yoshii! So you’re hiding here! Hold it right there!”

“I’m not going to wait! You’re going to kill me, right?”

“I’m not angry at all. Just hold on, will you!?”

That’s definitely a lie.

“These two really have rather good feelings.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

She said that she’s not angry, but she’s holding onto a rope for some reason.

<center>☆</center>

“Hoo…that was scary~”

It’s been past 30 minutes since I came running out of school, and before I knew it, I’m on a shopping street.

“Well. I don’t intend to buy anything, so I guess I’ll go back home—hm?”

Just as I intended to head home, I saw a familiar figure walk into a shop. Isn’t that Himeji-san?

“I guess it’s somewhat of a fate for us to meet here. Should I be courageous and call her…”

Though we did study in the same class during elementary school, we were separated into different classes during middle school. Before I knew it, Himeji-san seemed so distant from me. To see her in front of me after so many years, I really want to talk to her—the reason why I feel this way is most likely because of Yuuji’s words ‘She’ll erase you from her memory anyway’.

In order to turn my thoughts into action, I follow Himeji-san closely as I walked into the shop…only to find that there’re so many dolls here, it’s unbelievable. Seems like this is a doll shop that a girl will love the most—what the heck, this shop’s basically a doll shop!

“Well, let’s go back. This shop really doesn’t suit me.”

I immediately hasten my pace and walk towards the exit. Anyway, the most important thing right now is to leave this place.

“This is Hazuki’s only request of this lifetime. Please, uncle!”

“Even if you say that, I have to do business, you know…”

The moment I reached the exit, I suddenly heard this conversation. It seemed like a girl’s standing at the counter and telling the cashier something. She seems rather insistent on this. What’s going on?

I felt a bit mindful, so I turn my head to where the voice came from. As I expected, it’s a cashier uncle and a girl who looks like she’s in elementary school.

“I want to get that big Noi doll no matter what. Please, I beg you!”

“Even if you ask me like this…we’re doing business. Wouldn’t it be unfair to the other customers if I give you a little discount? We shopkeepers do have to treat all customers equally.”

“Even so, please!”

“Uuu…really can’t handle you…”

The cashier uncle looked rather troubled as he said this and scratches his face. The girl however continued to beg earnestly. Seeing such a small girl beg like this, I’ll be seen as really cruel if I’m to walk away like this…

“Hey, little girl, why do you want this doll?”

I know that I’m too nosey, but I still ended up getting involved.

Now that a 3rd party has suddenly appeared, the little girl and the uncle revealed a surprised look on their faces.

“Be, because onee-chan didn’t look too good recently. I wanted to buy the doll that she always wanted to hopefully motivate her…”

“Not looking good?”

“Most likely, because she just came back from Germany and couldn’t understand Japanese well!

Shifted houses…even if it’s within Japanese land, anyone will feel lonely when the friends and environment changes, let alone coming back to Japan.

“Even then, onee-chan took over mommy and daddy and did all the housework like sweeping and washing clothes nicely, and often play together with Hazuki…”

Seemed like it hit her sore spot as Hazuki-chan’s wide eyes start to tear up.

“Waa! Don, don’t cry! Nii-san will help you out here!”

“…Really?”

“Mm, really.”

“…Thank you, onii-chan!”

Wiping away the tears, Hazuki-chan reveals a delightful smile.

“Speaking of which, how much does this doll cost?”

The doll in Hazuki-chan’s arms is about 1m tall. If I make a rough estimate, I don’t think 5,000 yen’s going to be enough.

“Including tax, it’ll be a total of 24,800 yen.”

“Sorry, nii-san already tried, but he can’t do it.”

“Onii-chan?”

Hazuki-chan looks rather sad.

Argh! Didn’t expect one to be that expensive. Under these conditions, the declaration of surrender came out of my mouth without thinking through.

“Then how much does Hazuki-chan has?”

“I only have 10,000yen…”

So we’re missing 15,000. Including my entire fortune, there’s only 11,699 yen. We can’t even hitting the price of 24,800 yen! The most we can pay is half.

“Excuse me, can you sell this doll to us at 11,699 yen?”

“Eh, I just said before that that we’re doing a business here…”

The reply’s still the same.

“Onii-chan, this isn’t any different from before.”

Hazuki-chan whispered to my ear.

She’s right. Up till now, I’ve been doing the same thing as what Hazuki-chan’s been doing. However, things will be different from now on. I’m not an elementary school student; let’s show her how an adult (high school student) does things!

“We have only 11,699 yen in total, that’s about half the price of the doll, right?”

“Ya. That’s still not quite enough.”

“Hazuki-chan wants this doll, and uncle wants to sell this to her, but you’re unwilling to sell it to her at half price. If so, I have a great idea!”

“Hm? What is it?”

“We can rip the doll in half and sell the right side to—eh? What? Why are you two seeing me as an idiot?”

“…Are you really a high school student?”

“…Onii-chan’s an idiot!”

I, I actually got called stupid by an elementary school kid!

“I can’t give you a discount, but I can guarantee that I won’t sell this doll away for the time being. You can go back to discuss with your parents first.”

Making this conclusion, the uncle ended the conversation just like this.

“Can’t you ask your parents to buy it for you, Hazuki-chan?”

Having walked out of the shop, we came to the park to discuss our plans.

“Mommy and daddy aren’t normally at home…so they would leave the money to one-chan. If I want to buy something, onee-chan will definitely ask for a reason…”

“I see, uu~”

Wanting to do something for her beloved older sister—Hazuki-chan’s heart’s ever so glamorous, it’s way different from my family who sent me to Fumitzuki Gakuen on the excuse of ‘not wanting to waste school fees’. I must help Hazuki-chan in order to prevent her from losing this intimacy with her family.

But speaking of which, what should I do? It’ll be good if I have some more money, but my money’s about to be used it…

“Oh ya! Hazuki can get money if she sells her manga to a second-hand shop, right?”

Hazuki-chan thought of this brilliant plan as her eyes sparkle. It’s true that we can get money just like this, but I think that she can’t get so much anyway. Of course, it’s a different case altogether if I have those handheld games that were confiscated this morning—

“Hm? Oh ya, there’s this plan after all!”

“…Onii-chan, have you thought of something?”

“I can’t possibly get it back it my hands anyway. If I’m successful, we may be able to get enough money to buy the doll…”

Though I don’t think it can work…mm! It’s still worth a try though.

“Okay! Hazuki-chan, can you come back to the park tomorrow?”

“Y, yes. I can come over…”

“Then we’ll meet here tomorrow. It’s getting dark now, let’s go home.”

I waved my hands and said goodbye to Hazuki-chan. Anyway, I got to discuss it with Yuuji and the rest tomorrow.

“Ah, mm, bye bye…”

Speaking of which, did Himeji-san really enter that shop?

<center>☆</center>

“So you want to take back those confiscated items?”

The next morning, in the same classroom, I talked to the trio as per usual.

“I do feel that it’s a pity to leave those things that got confiscated yesterday, but…”

“Uu~mm…ya, but the opponent’s that Ironman. We may be designated as ‘Punishment Inspectors’ if we’re not careful…”

Yuuji and Hideyoshi lower their chin and ponder. Seems like they don’t intend to help me. This is bad, looks like I have to deal with this on my own.

“…I approve of Akihisa’s proposal.”

“Eh? Muttsulini? You’re willing to help me?”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

Great! Now at least I have someone who specializes in stealth helping me out.

“…Never mind, let’s give it a go.”

“Ah? So Yuuji’s okay with it?”

“Yeah. I just bought that MP3 recently, and I accumulated quite a debt to Ironman, so let’s settle this once and for all.”

Yuuji smirked. What an enthusiastic bad guy’s face.

“If so, I’ll help out as well. If I can get back those things, I don’t want to give up as well.”

In the end, even Hideyoshi nodded his head, and everyone decided to take part in this. As expected of the group problematic first-years.

“Right now, the most important thing is to investigate where our targets are.”

“That’s right. If we don’t even know where Ironman hid those confiscated items, we can’t possibly get them back even if we want to.”

The confiscated items may have ended up being abandoned, but they were just confiscated yesterday, so Ironman should still have them with him.

“That’s the case. Akihisa, remove the silence function of the phone.”

“Eh? Why?”

“Don’t ask too much, just do it. You want those confiscated items back, right?”

“…I’m not really sure what’s going on, but I just need to remove the silence function, right?”

“That’s right.”

The phone can’t possibly ring during lesson time, there shouldn’t be any problems, right? Let’s just follow what Yuuji told me to do.

I pull my handphone out from my pocket and took it out of silent mode.

“Oi, you people better hurry up and sit down. I’m going to start taking attendance.”

Seeing our homeroom teacher Ironman walk into the classroom, I immediately slip the handphone back into my pocket.

“Alright, let’s begin.”

Thus, our battle for the confiscated items officially begins now.

“Shimada.”

“Here.”

“Shimizu.”

“Here.”

At the usual time of taking attendance, Ironman’s coarse voice echoes clearly throughout the classroom.

“Yamaguchi.”

“Here.”

“Watanabe.”

“Here.”

—Beep beep beep.

Suddenly, a beep interrupted the class while attendance is taken. Whose phone is it? Really, do think that we have such a stupid person in class. The phone will definitely get confiscated when it rings in class.

“…Yoshii, hand over your phone.”

“…Yes.”

The problem is, this stupid person was me.

Damn it! Why must it ring at this moment!? Who called me!?

<<Missed call: Sakamoto Yuuji>>

“Yu, Yuuji, you betrayed me!”

“I’ll consficate the handphone then.”

“Ahh! Handphone! MY HANDPHONE!”

My handphone got taken away by Ironman mercilessly.

“Very good. Nobody’s came late nor skipped classes. I hope that all students will continue to keep this up.”

After taking the attendance, Ironman moves his heavy feet out of the classroom—together with my handphone.

“Very good. Part 1 of the plan is complete.”

“Yuuji! What sort of grudge do you have against me! Now my handphone got confiscated by Ironman all because of you!”

“This is a bait meant to fish out where our targets are. We just need to take them back.”

“Eh? Bait?”

“That’s right. I deliberately allowed Ironman to confiscate your handphone in order to find out where Ironman hid those items.”

“Why didn’t you tell me in the first place…”

And if possible, I hope that you can use your handphone as bait.

“…I’m back.”

“WAHH!”

Suddenly talking right behind me. You scared me~

“Oh, Muttsulini came back already. How was it?”

“…Those confiscated items are placed in the staff storage cupboard.”

“As expected of Muttsulini, erasing your own presence to tail people, that truly is your specialty. I’m impressed.”

Seems like Muttsulini went to tail Ironman and investigate where my handphone was hidden. If it’s tailing others without attracting attention, Yuuji can’t do it, and Hideyoshi doesn’t have the skills.

“…But the cupboard’s locked.”

“Okay. So where’s the key?”

“…In the rear left pocket of Ironman’s pants.”

“I see. If so, we have to snatch the ket from him.”

“Ya, but how are we going to do that?”

“No problems. I got a good idea. We’ll take action during cleaning time.”

Anyway, let's attend lessons and wait for school dismissal.

<center>☆</center>

It's finally dismissal time.

“So, what plan do you have?”

As I tried to sneak out yesterday, I was punished to sweep the entire corridor alone. Thus, I'm discussing the plan with Yuuji and the rest while twisting the mop around. These damned guys don't have any intentions of helping out in the first place.

“We'll be using that.”

Yuuji lifts his chin and points.

“A pail? What are we going to do with that?”

“We're going to use that to splash water on Ironman and make him take off his clothes.”

I see. If so, we can then take his clothes away and take the key to the cupboard,

“Mm hm~ this method is simple and easy to succeed.”

Hideyoshi's right. We can't possibly fail. Basically, there's only the last problem to this plan, and that is—whoever going to splash the water on Ironman will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.

“There's only one problem in this plan, and that's the one who's going to splash the water, 'Akihisa' will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.”

Hold on! Is it decided that I'll be the one in charge of doing this?

“However, that's not really a huge problem.”

THAT'S A HUGE PROBLEM TO ME!

“Oi, isn't that too strange? Let's settle this with rock paper scissors!”

“Ooh, look! Me and our target's already here.”

“Very good. You got to do your best, Akihisa!”

“...Do your best.”

“Eh? Hold on!”

The trio already wordlessly retreated back in the shortest time possible.

Ironman has already climbed up the stairs. If so, I can only do this!

My eyes have already captured the target, and the relative speed was estimated. The prepared weapon's in my hand, everything's okay—time to attack!

“WAAHH! I SLIPPED!”

Dragging the mop, I deliberately fell forward by letting my feet stagger and aim the pail at Ironman, who's on the stairs. GET WET!

“GUAH!”

How, how is it possible! As expected of Ironman! To be able to suddenly react in the blink of an eye and dodge the splash thanks to his superhuman senses! However—

“WHERE ARE YOU ESCAPING TO!?”

I drag the mop in my hand to where Ironman dodged to. I won't admit defeat so easily!

Phoosh, Clak cak cak.

The water from the pail drenched Ironman, and the pail rolls asie. Mission accomplished.

I pick up the pail and mop that I threw out as I remain mindful not to step on the puddle of water, saying to a stunned Ironman “Sorry, I slipped—AHH, sensei! An encyclopaedia isn't to be used as a weapon!”

“I thought I just heard you say 'Where are you escaping to', didn't I?”

“That's just a hallucination.”

“Stop trying to lie to me with such a serious look on your face. Get ready to die!”

“Sen, sensei, please don't use the edge of the encyclopaedia!”

Where are you guys now! Come save me! I'll definitely be beaten down by Ironman into a panda if this keeps up!

“Ahh, Akihisa, you really ended up doing it.”

Yuuji and the rest appeared out of nowhere. Anyway, I'm saved~

“I told you so many times 'not to splash water onto sensei'...”

“Ow, OWW! SENSEI! I SAID THAT I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE ALREADY!”

They, they didn't help out at all! These damned guys! Are they intending to sit around and watch?

“Sensei, punish Akihisa later. I guess you better change your clothes. If you don't mind, I'll lend my P.E. attire to you.”

“That's right. Sorry, then lend me that. Yoshii, stay behind and scrub the floor clean!”

Leaving these words behind, Ironman, who was drenched by me, head off to the classroom with Yuuji and the rest to change clothes.

“...So unfortunate.”

Anyway, I remained behind to clean the floor up. Besides, I have the cleaning tools in my hand.

Just as I'm working hard to wipe the water off the floor, Hideyoshi walks out of the classroom and moves towards me.

“I got the key, Akihisa.”

“Really? Then we just need to enter the staffroom and get back the confiscated items.”

“Umm, let's hurry up before Ironman realizes it.”

“Got it!”

After letting the mop lean against the wall, Hideyoshi and I quickly head towards the staffroom.

“I'm going in then.”

I took the cupboard key from Hideyoshi's hands and reach my hand out for the door.

“There’s no problem, right?”

“No need to worry. I’ll try my best to walk into the staffroom without raising too much attention and get those things back.”

I should be just an ordinary student to every teacher, except for Ironman. I should be more suited for this role as compared to Hideyoshi, who has the look of a beauty.

“Really? Then I’ll just wait here for your good news.”

“Mm, I’m going in then~ ‘cuse me~”

I open the staffroom door slightly. No problem, I’m not some irritating guy.

“Yoshii? Hurry up and get over here!”

“Why!? Why am I noticed so soon after entering the room!?”

I got caught by the Ancient Literature teacher immediately after entering the room. Why?

“I want to hear what excuse you have regarding the essay ‘translate the Tsurezuregusa[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#] into Modern Language’!”

“Ah, I did hand in my homework properly.”

“I’m asking why did you turn the Tsurezuregusa into a rap!?”

“Eh? But sensei wanted it to be translated into the modern language, and speaking of modern Japanese, isn’t it—”

“Ah, Yoshii-kun, remember to come over here after you’re done there.”

“Yoshii, that Chemistry report you handed in was too ridiculous! Come over and explain it to me later.”

Unknowingly, I got surrounded by several teachers. Well, if this is the case, forget about completing the plan, I’ll be hounded by these teachers till night! Got to find a way to get away from them!

“Excuse me…”

Just as I’m pondering on what to do, someone else entered the staffroom. Hm? Isn’t that Hideyoshi?

"Ooh, isn’t that Kinoshita? What’s wrong?”

“I, I suddenly…don’t feel too good…but the health teacher isn’t…in…”

Hideyoshi cupped his mouth. He really doesn’t look too good. Is he sick?

“Hideyoshi, are you—”

I frantically rushed towards him. At this moment, he suddenly blinked at me. I see, so he’s acting! As expected of someone from the drama club, I nearly got fooled.

“Sorry, but can I rest here—”

Before finishing, Hideyoshi collapsed onto the floor.

“Ki, Kinoshita! Are you alright?”

“Anyway, let’s take him to the sickbay!”

“You, you’re right! Sensei, please carry his legs!”

A few teachers start to create quite the ruckus. After that, everyone in the staffroom left to accompany Hideyoshi to the sick bay. Brilliantly done, Hideyoshi!

“Let’s use this opportunity to get back those confiscated items. Let me see, Ironman…no wait, it’s Nishimura. Nishimura’s…”

I checked the nametag on the cupboards which are according to order. Oh, found it. It’s this one.

“…Speaking of which, I somehow imagined that bugs will crawl out of Ironman’s cupboard.”

Though I’m a bit fearful, I have no time to hesitate. I pull out the key Hideyoshi handed to me and pull the door handle down, opening the metal cupboard effortlessly.

“Oh, it’s unexpectedly clean…”

The cupboard’s arranged rather neatly, and the bag of confiscated goods are placed in an obvious place.

“Let’s get out of here before someone notices—hm?”

Just as I was about to lock the cupboard up and run away, I noticed a pile of old books tied up in raffia strings. Should be meant for throwing away.

“Uu~hm…since he’s going to throw it, I might as well take it. Maybe I can get some money as well.”

After grabbing the books with both hands, I immediately dashed out of the staffroom.

“Okay! At least we achieved our goal!”

After what happened just now, I brought the spoils—the bag of confiscated items back to Yuuji, only taking away my own stuff and the pile of old books. I then took them over to a second-hand shop to exchange these spoils for cash.

My handheld games and gaming software garnered a price lower than what I expected, while that pile of books got quite the price; what a nice mistake in estimation. I really got to thank Ironman for this.

“Let me see, is that girl here~”

“Ah! Onii-chan! You're here!”

Hazuki-chan immediately came running over to me the moment I approached the park. She really looked like a cute puppy, and that even warms my heart. Maybe it's because I'm often surrounded by idiots, Ironman and a violent girl...

“Mm, because we arranged to meet each other. Oh yeah, where did you get that doll from?”

Looking closely, Hazuki-chan's hugging something similar to the Noi doll that she wanted to buy (is that what it's called?). It looks as if it was sewn by hand.

“There was a pretty onee-chan who came over and said to me 'If that onii-chan couldn't succeed, then give this to your sister!' and handed it over to me!”

“?”
“And she also said 'If that onii-chan managed to buy the doll, i'll give this doll to you.'.”

The kid's lac of order in her speech confused me.

Erm, let me straighten Hazuki-chan's words out—

—A pretty onee-chan came to Hazuki-chan today.

—And then, she handed this handmade doll over to Hazuki-chan

—This pretty onee-chan even said that if I couldn't do it, she'll give this doll to Hazuki-chan's sister as a gift.

—But if I succeeded, this doll will go to Hazuki-chan.

—So that's how it is.

“Mmm, is that so? Then this doll will go to hazuki-chan.”

“Eh/ Really?”

“Yeah. And this doll will go to Hazuki-chan's sister.”

I hand over the large doll in my hand over to Hazuki-chan. It should be tough for her petite body to carry such a large doll, she she still received it delightedly.

“This is great! Thank you, onii-chan!”
“No problems. It'll be great if your sister can cheer up.”

I patted her head. Hazuki-chan seems to enjoy it as she slowly closes her eyes.

“Uu~ Ah, that's right! Onii-chan, can you lend me your ear?”

“Eh? What is it? Are you going to say a secret to me or something?”

“don't ask, just lend me your ear.”

Is she about to thank me? I'm really touched. One can't become a proper adult if the person can't even say 'thank you' or 'sorry'.

“Okay, what is it?”

I bent over to match her height, but unexpectedly—

“Thank you, onii-chan♪”

Whoosh! A cute sensation passes my face. Eh? This...don't tell me this is...

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 043.jpg|thumb]]

“Wha, wha, wha...”

“Onii-chan may be an idiot, but he's so gentle! Hazuki-cahn loves you! When I grow up, I'll let you become my husband!”

Without waiting for me to reply, Hazuki-chan skips out of the park.

Re, recently, these elementary school students are...

I touched my face with my hand, seemingly wanting to wipe away the soft sensation that's left on the face. Even without looking at the mirror, I know my face is red. How, how embarrassing...she's just an elementary school kid...

“Hoo...time for me to go back as well...”

After lifting my bag up and slinging it over my back, I head off towards the exit of the park. While exiting, I see a familiar figure yesterday. That person is—

“Excuse me...are you Himeji-san?”

“Ah, yes, what is it—YO, YOSHII-KUN!”

So it's Himeji-san. It sure is hard to find another pretty girl. I can't possibly be mistaken.

“Sorry, I seemed to have scared you.”

“No, no worries. I was just dazed...”

Our conversation got interrupted just like that. This, this is really awkward...what should I say to a friend who I haven't met for a long time?

“Erm, that...it's really a coincidence that we met her. Did you just finish class? But you look rather tired here, are you?”

“Yes,because I stayed up all night...”

“Hei~so Himeji-san would also stay up.”

The impression she gives is that she lives her life normally, but it's unexpected that she would stay up.

“That's not it, I just stayed up last night, because I got something I have to do no matter what...”

She inadvertently yawned as she continued to talk. Himeji-san sure is cute when she lets out some tears due to sleepiness.

“Then, I'll be going off in this direction, goodbye.”

Ah, mm, byebye.”

I waved my hand to Himeji-san, who bowed to me courteously.

While walking home, I just realized—oh ya, why did Himeji-san appear in such a place?

<center>☆</center>

“...There was a case of theft in the staffroom room.”

The next morning, during self-study period, Ironman suddenly mentioned this. He's definitely referring to the bag of confiscated items that we got yesterday.

“Such a tragedy worth being angry over, don't you think so, Yoshii?”

He actually threw this question at me. As expected of Ironman, he must have realized that I was the perpetrator, but who will follow you obediently?

“Yeah, sure is worth sighing over.”

I naturally replied with these few words. No problems, I got everything under control.

“Really? Speaking of which, that culprit even took sensei's books.”

Hm? Books? Is he referring to that bundle of books? Wasn't he going to throw them away?

“And that culprit actually had the guts to use his own identity to sell my books to a second-hand shop.”

“Is that so, he sure has guts.”

“Yeah, hahahaha!”

“Ahhahaha...”

Ironman and I started laughing with all enthusiasm. Really, we're laughing with all sorts of happiness—at least it lookde that way if not for those eyes.

“YOSHII! GET READY TO DIE!!!”

“So, sorry! Who knew that it was sensei's collection, I didn't—”

“Are you saying that you didn't even think of it?”

“No, I did think about it, but then I thought 'since its Ironman's, it doesn't matter~'! OW! OUCH! SENSEI! MY SKULLCAP GOT SMASHED IN MY YOU!”

“So you idiot has the highest suspicion. Looks like I have to be even more careful and watch you.”

“Sensei! I'm feeling that I've been watched by you all this time, there's no way for you to watch me further!”

“No, there still is, right? I got a really precious title of honor that's suitable for you—“

“Eh, this is...”

“Everyone at the staff meeting this morning have all agreed, so accept this. This is a present that sensei's handing you.”

From who knows when, Ironman suddenly has a piece of paper in his hand. This plain white paper has only a single line on it.

—Yoshii Akihisa.

The above mentioned has been designed as the 'Punishment Inspector' of Fumitzuki Gakuen.

<center>☆</center>

“Onee-chan!”

Hm? Hazuki, what's up?”

“Well, this is for onee-chan!”

“Eh? Isn't this the Noi doll that I always wanted? How did you...”

“Because onee-chan looked so lethargic. Hazuki prepared it for onee-chan to cheer onee-chan up!”

“Hazuki...really, you...thank you, onee-chan's really happy!”

“Schoolwork may be tough, but you must work hard, Minami nee-chan!”

“Hm, I'll do my best! I'll feel like I lost if I continue to mess around like this. And also...”

“And also what?”

“i'm mindful of someone in school.”

“Eh? Onee-chan's mindful of someone? Who is it? How is that person like?”

“Well~as repayment of the Noi doll, I'll only say this to Hazuki. That person is in the same class as me, and he's one huge idiot~”

<noinclude>
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| Back to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Novel Illustrations|Novel Illustrations]]
| Return to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Fumizuki News|Fumizuki News (An interview with Yoshii Akihisa from Class 2-F)]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3.5 Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～

2011-04-20T14:16:34Z

Caolsei:

==Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju ～Preparation Chapter～==

'''Please fill in the correct name of the historical person in the blank below.'''

The person who instituted the rakuichi rakuza and abolished monopolies to promote business and economic growth is ______.

'''Himeji Mizuki’s answer:'''

“Oda Nobunaga”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Correct answer.

'''Shimada Minami’s answer:'''

“Chonmage”[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#]

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Gotten used to Japan already? Sensei’s a bit worried on seeing your answer.

'''Yoshii Akihisa’s answer:'''

“Nobu”

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

You’re very familiar with him, aren't you?

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 007.jpg|thumb]]

After we shifted here, onee-chan seemed to be a lot more lethargic.

Is it because she’s being bullied at school? Or is it that there’s someone she finds irritating?

But then again, every time onee-chan talked about those classmates, it sounded really interesting. Onee-chan also seemed like she really likes them…

If so, why’s onee-chan so lethargic?

Is it because of school work? Onee-chan did say before the she has some difficulty.

I hope the onee-chan can recover soon.

It’s going to be onee-chan’s birthday, would onee-chan be motivated if I give her a huge plushie? Onee-chan always loved dolls after all.

Mm, let’s do that! I’ll buy a big big Noi doll for onee-chan to cheer her up!

…I wonder if I have enough pocket money?

<center>☆</center>

“EVERYONE FREEZE! PUT YOUR BAGS ON THE TABLE AND LET ME SEE WHAT YOU BROUGHT TO SCHOOL!”

Just right after morning self-study period started, the homeroom teacher in charge of our class, Iron—I’ll try that again, Nishimura-sensei, who’s in charge of our class, suddenly declared this without warning.

Argh! Not good! I brought nothing that’s related to attending lessons at all!

—Should I carry my bag and run away at the fastest speed I can?

For that moment, that idea appeared in my mind.

“Let me tell you beforehand, don’t ever think of running away!”

It’s a difficult task to run away from this homeroom teacher. Besides, this guy’s a brawny teacher with the moniker ‘ironman’. No matter how we try to run, he’ll use this body that’s trained for an ‘Ironman’ triathlon to pursue us relentlessly.

“Alright, I’m going to start checking. If there’s anything unrelated to attending lessons, I will confiscate them without leaving anything.”

Starting from the first row near the corridor, Ironman startst to check the contents of all the bags one by one and confiscate the poker cards and magazines that each person brought.

“Sakamoto, let me see what’s inside your pocket.”

Among us, one of the students has not only his bag, even his pockets are to be checked.

“…Damn it.”

Sakamoto Yuuji makes a sound in agony—he’s my best worst friend.

However, he still obediently rummages through his pocket and pulls out an MP3.

“As expected. I’ll be confiscating this.”

After saying this, Ironman puts Yuuji’s MP3 into his confiscation pouch. Yuuji, who never expected his pocket to be search through, glares at Ironman defiantly.

(This is a disaster, isn’t it, Yuuji?)

I whispered to Yuuji’s ear.

(Really a disaster. Would they normally check pockets? I’m the only one who got my pockets checked!)

(Can’t be helped. Who asked Yuuji to be such a bad person?)

(…Go to hell!)

Looking closely, it seems like Ironman’s method of checking will change according to the student. He’ll only ask the well-behaved students to open their bags and briefly look through their bags once. But for the ill-behaved students, he’ll check thoroughly, even including the inside bags of the bag.

“You’re next, Yoshii Akihisa.”

“Ah, yes.”

Ironman arrives in front of me. Even though I don’t think that he’ll ask me to rummage through my pockets like Yuuji—

“Take off your uniform first, and change into your P.E. attire.”

“Eh? Aren’t you being too wary?”

This level of trust far exceeds what I imagined.

“Well…Nishimura-sensei, for me to change in front of the girls, it’s a bit…”

“That won’t do. you may be hiding some prohibited item in your trousers, so take them out.”

“How can you do this! Even if it’s me, I can’t possibly go to that extent! You should at least trust me—”

Just as I agitatedly approached sensei, ‘CLACK!’, something seemed to drop out from the leg of my trousers.

“Oi, Akihisa, your NDS dropped out.”

I received the handheld gaming console that Yuuji nicely helped me picked up, and after saying thanks, I again face sensei.

“Sensei, believe in me, will you?”

“Forget about wearing P.E. attire.”

How, how is this possible! He’s actually even more wary now!

“You actually brought gaming consoles, manga, light novels, DVD…what one earth are you treating school as?”

My precious stuff are confiscated away, one by one. Speaking of which, why did he do a spot-check when I brought so many things out? The value of those confiscated items may total up to be tens of thousands yen.

“Are these all? I said before, the school is a place for you to learn knowledge, you are not allowed to bring anything unrelated to school.”

After searching, Ironman carried the confiscated items back to the podium. I won’t be able to see my precious again…

“Alright, since you people brought all these along, morning self-study will be cancelled. The first lesson will be ‘summoning practical’, all students are to immediately rush over to the gym.”

After saying this, Ironman carries all the confiscated items and leaves the classroom.

<center>☆</center>

“—Summon!”

Hearing the summoning call echo throughout the gym, I say to Yuuji, who’s beside me.

“…It’s only early morning and we’re already so unlucky.”

“Yeah, that MP3 I bought last month actually got confiscated, damn it.”

“Wah, that’s not too long ago.”

“That one was expensive, you know!”

Yuuji’s wild looking face shrivels with sadness as he continues to complain. I can understand~~this feeling.”

“Akihisa, you got your handheld games confiscated as well, right? There’s quite a few of them.”

“Mm…the total value should be over 30,000 yen.”

Handheld games, game software, DVDs and CDs; totaling up the value of all the confiscated items, the number 1 this time should be either me or Muttsulini. How unlucky…”

“Next, Himeji Mizuki, please step forward.”

“Ye, yes.”

“Oh, it’s Himeji now? Rare for her to wear a P.E. attire. Muttsulini, is it really alright not to take photos of her?”

“…My camera got confiscated.”

“I see, quite the pity. We’re in different classes, so it’s rare to see Himeji-san in a P.E. attire.”

“There’s only this one summoning practical.”

“…(Lowers head dejectedly).”

Muttsulini’s so depressed that he can’t even lift his head up. Sigh, this can’t be helped anyway.

Silky and smooth long hair, and cute and innocent look, an ample chest that seems to be self-aware and supports the uniform; Even if it’s not Muttsulini, any guy will want to take a photo of her pretty figure; I know that I definitely want to.

“Is, is this how you do it? Summon!”

Himeji-san doesn’t really seem confident as she mutters. A geometrical magic array appears beside her feet, and Himeji-san’s summoned beast appears in front of everyone.

“As expect of Himeji, her summoned beast sure looks impressive…”

“Yeah, and cute too.”

Himeji-san’s summoned beast looks really cute. Since a summoned beast is basically formed from the caster’s appearance, and since the caster’s already so cute looking, there’s no need to emphasize it further.

But speaking of which, what makes her summoned beast so impressive—

“Most likely, nobody else will be able to wield such a terrifyingly huge sword.”

“Yeah, only Himeji-san is able to do that.”

Her summoned beast is wielding a Western longsword that’s several times longer than her height, and she’s lifting it effortlessly. Anyone can tell that this summoned beast isn’t to be underestimated.

Class C, Himeji Mizuki, Combined subjects 3943 points.

Vs

Class C, Furukawa Ayumi, Combined subjects 1264 points.

The reference points appear in front of us. These are the results of the previous mid-term exams.

“I see, so that’s why she’s so strong.”

“It’s almost 4000 points. Himeji-san sure is smart.”

Mmm…holed up in a corner, we continue to nod our heads away.

The strength of a summoned beast is equivalent to the points that the owner gets. Since the test summoning system totals up the marks, basically, the higher amount of points a person gets, the stronger the summoned beast will be.

“Speaking of which, don’t Akihisa and Himeji know each other?”

“Mm~ she was my grade school classmate…but we haven’t spoken to each other for years. She should have forgotten about me, right?”

We’re in different classes right now, separated for a long time. If there’s a chance, I’ll definitely want to talk to her, but there’s no real chance for me to talk to any girl from another class. If I’m to go to her class and immediately say “Himeji-san, I got something to say to you”, this will look like a confession no matter what.

“I see, you’ll most likely be streamed into different classes next year. I can you can be erased from Hiemji’s memory.”

“Next year? Are you talking about the streaming exam?”

“Yeah, you definitely won’t be able to be in the same class as her anyway.”

“Now that you mentioned it, that’s right…”

After we entered school, we were streamed into different classes like other schools. But next year, things will be different. We’ll be sorted according to our grades. Though Himeji-san is in class C, when we become second-years, she’ll definitely be sorted into class A with those top grades of hers. If so, me and Yuuji will definitely be unable to be classmates with her since we’re just straddling about in class D anyway.

“I’ll be forgotten by her…this sure feels rather lonely…”

“Yeah, there’s no benefit for her to remember you anyway.”

“How can you say that!”

Just as we’re blankly seeing other classes battle it out and talking away—

“Next! Yoshii Akihisa and Shimada Minami!”

Ironman—let me repeat that again, this is the voice of our homeroom teacher, Nishimura-sensei.

Recovering myself, I find that those before me who were waiting to practice their summoning are all back.

“I’m going then.”

“Go then. You’re a ‘punishment inspector’ candidate anyway, go learn how to control a summoned beast properly.”

“…I say, I’m different from you Yuuji. I’m not some problematic kid!”

I rolled my eyes back at Yuuji. Really, what about being a ‘punishment inspector’? That’s really rude. Aren’t they saying that I’m a problematic student? Why is he calling me this when it’s basically the equivalent of being an idiot?

“Hurry up, Yoshii!!”

“Alright~”

Hearing Ironman roar at me, I hastily increase my pace.

Paying attention, the training partner has already finished her summoning.

“…”

The person stares at the summoned beast in front of her in shock. This girl with an energetic-looking ponytail and attractive long legs is my classmate, Shimada-san. At this moment, she reveals a slight melancholic look that doesn’t fit her. What happened? Why’s she looking so depressed and lethargic? Is her summoned beast even weak and useless than what she thought would be?”

“What’s wrong, Shimada-san? Are you shocked that your summoned beast is so weak?”

After saying this, I see that she seems to be healed by my gentleness. The grey clouds above her are gone, now replaced with a look of delight.

“Ah, so Yoshii’s the opponent. How delightful.”

Shimada-san slightly blushes. Seeing her so happy, I felt happy as well—oh my, to reveal her feelings to me in front of everyone like this, this kid’s really troublesome.”

“Because it’s great to beat up Yoshii.”

…This kid’s really troublesome!

“Shimada-san, the target’s the summoned beast, not us.”

I’m a little worried, so I confirmed the rules with her again. This is the summoning practical that’s meant for the summoning battles next year, so no matter what, this should be a battle between summoned beasts.

“You’re right, we won’t be fighting each other.”

Shimada-san immediately nodded her head in agreement. Great, seems like she understood.

“Since I’ll be the one dishing out the beatdown anyway.”

SEEMS LIKE SHE DIDN’T UNDERSTAND AT ALL!

“That, sensei, what Shimada-san did just now was an act of violence. If you have the time to check our belongings, you should do something about this case of school violence, right?”

“…Shimada, even if the opponent’s Yoshii, violence is bad.”

“But sensei…”

No buts. A no is a no, you understand?”

“…Yes.”

“Really…so you really understand? If so—”

Ironman suddenly reveals a smirk and says,

“—I’ll give you a special discount this time.”

“Eh? Aren’t those words really weird?”

Am I thinking too much? It seemed like a teacher just allowed a case of school violence!

“I’ll do my best!”

“Right, so you must work hard.”

“Ah haha, sensei, Shimada-san, you two are really stupid. Do you think that you two can beat me so easily? If so, I’m going to counter and beat you two—I’M SORRY, IT’S MY FAULT, PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!”

It’s useless even if I apologised.

Don’t tell me…that those cautious words of mine caused this disaster?

<center>☆</center>

“Ho…ever since morning inspection, it’s been one disaster after another today…”

After a day’s worth of lessons, it’s dismissal time. I’m chatting away with those guys who I usually talk to.

“That’s because Akihisa-bro brought so many unnecessary things to school.”

Sitting beside me and showing me a smile is Kinoshita Hideyoshi, who’s in the same class as me, Yuuji and Muttsulini. It’s already weird to hear him speak like an old man, and he has a beauty’s face on him. He really likes to make comments. Even so, I do feel that he’s the most normal person after me, since the other two are so abnormal that words can’t describe them.

“Speaking of which, Hideyoshi didn’t get anything confiscated, right?

“Of course I did, I got some costumes and props confiscated from me. Even though I told sensei that it’s for the drama club, they still got confiscated either way.”

The school has already provided some props and costumes for Hideyoshi, so Hideyoshi himself doesn’t need to bring them. If so, these are unnecessary things. However—

“There’s no need to confiscate them all anyway, he could have given us some leeway. Who expected Ironman’s brain to be so hard.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“His brain’s definitely filled with lead.”

Muttsulini and Yuuji seem to agree with me. This can’t be helped, since they got quite a few things confiscated as well.

And I actually thought that ‘we’re just having summoning practical today, so there’re no lessons; should be rather relaxing today.”

It was supposed to be relaxing, but I guess it’s better to have lessons without the search.

“Summoning practical…”

Hearing my little grumbling, Yuuji muttered to himself.

“Eh? What’s wrong, Yuuji?”

“Nothing. It’s just that I remembered that we have to take part in summoning war next year.”

For some reason, he sure seemed happy when he said this.

Speaking of summoning war, well, it’s about having a summoning battle between classes with the class facilities on the line. If we can move onto second year without any mishaps, we’ll have this summoning war system on us.

“But why must we have this summoning war system? If we want to differentiate the scores clearly, can’t we just stick grades onto everyone?”

“Well, most likely, they prefer a summoning war to tests since it can motivate students, right? As a class, the students will work hard to not drag their classmates down.”

“I see. So they intend to make us work together and improve our grades without breaking us, right?”

“Yeah, this allows the school to do what they want the most, and that’s ‘to groom students who can showcase their real potential in society’.”

“Oh~ Is that so?”

Just as the four of them were chatting away.

“Ah…really, that Yoshii actually left the cleaning work to me. Where did he go off to?”

A certain student can be heard shouting on the corridor. Is that Shimada-san?

“What the heck, Akihisa. You’re in charge of cleaning today?”

“Mm, but I left the cleaning work to Shimada-san and ran off first.”

“Hmm, according to how I see it, you two have quite the relationship.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

“Ah haha, it’s not what you think it is.”

“Really. Once I catch him, I’ll tie his limbs up and throw him down the 3rd level!”

That’s a highly difficult stunt even a stuntman will be afraid of.

“Sorry, I don’t think I can protect my own life any longer. I’ll be leaving now!”

Without saying anything else, I grabbed my bag and dashed out of the corridor. I love my life.

“Ah, Yoshii! So you’re hiding here! Hold it right there!”

“I’m not going to wait! You’re going to kill me, right?”

“I’m not angry at all. Just hold on, will you!?”

That’s definitely a lie.

“These two really have rather good feelings.”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

She said that she’s not angry, but she’s holding onto a rope for some reason.

<center>☆</center>

“Hoo…that was scary~”

It’s been past 30 minutes since I came running out of school, and before I knew it, I’m on a shopping street.

“Well. I don’t intend to buy anything, so I guess I’ll go back home—hm?”

Just as I intended to head home, I saw a familiar figure walk into a shop. Isn’t that Himeji-san?

“I guess it’s somewhat of a fate for us to meet here. Should I be courageous and call her…”

Though we did study in the same class during elementary school, we were separated into different classes during middle school. Before I knew it, Himeji-san seemed so distant from me. To see her in front of me after so many years, I really want to talk to her—the reason why I feel this way is most likely because of Yuuji’s words ‘She’ll erase you from her memory anyway’.

In order to turn my thoughts into action, I follow Himeji-san closely as I walked into the shop…only to find that there’re so many dolls here, it’s unbelievable. Seems like this is a doll shop that a girl will love the most—what the heck, this shop’s basically a doll shop!

“Well, let’s go back. This shop really doesn’t suit me.”

I immediately hasten my pace and walk towards the exit. Anyway, the most important thing right now is to leave this place.

“This is Hazuki’s only request of this lifetime. Please, uncle!”

“Even if you say that, I have to do business, you know…”

The moment I reached the exit, I suddenly heard this conversation. It seemed like a girl’s standing at the counter and telling the cashier something. She seems rather insistent on this. What’s going on?

I felt a bit mindful, so I turn my head to where the voice came from. As I expected, it’s a cashier uncle and a girl who looks like she’s in elementary school.

“I want to get that big Noi doll no matter what. Please, I beg you!”

“Even if you ask me like this…we’re doing business. Wouldn’t it be unfair to the other customers if I give you a little discount? We shopkeepers do have to treat all customers equally.”

“Even so, please!”

“Uuu…really can’t handle you…”

The cashier uncle looked rather troubled as he said this and scratches his face. The girl however continued to beg earnestly. Seeing such a small girl beg like this, I’ll be seen as really cruel if I’m to walk away like this…

“Hey, little girl, why do you want this doll?”

I know that I’m too nosey, but I still ended up getting involved.

Now that a 3rd party has suddenly appeared, the little girl and the uncle revealed a surprised look on their faces.

“Be, because onee-chan didn’t look too good recently. I wanted to buy the doll that she always wanted to hopefully motivate her…”

“Not looking good?”

“Most likely, because she just came back from Germany and couldn’t understand Japanese well!

Shifted houses…even if it’s within Japanese land, anyone will feel lonely when the friends and environment changes, let alone coming back to Japan.

“Even then, onee-chan took over mommy and daddy and did all the housework like sweeping and washing clothes nicely, and often play together with Hazuki…”

Seemed like it hit her sore spot as Hazuki-chan’s wide eyes start to tear up.

“Waa! Don, don’t cry! Nii-san will help you out here!”

“…Really?”

“Mm, really.”

“…Thank you, onii-chan!”

Wiping away the tears, Hazuki-chan reveals a delightful smile.

“Speaking of which, how much does this doll cost?”

The doll in Hazuki-chan’s arms is about 1m tall. If I make a rough estimate, I don’t think 5,000 yen’s going to be enough.

“Including tax, it’ll be a total of 24,800 yen.”

“Sorry, nii-san already tried, but he can’t do it.”

“Onii-chan?”

Hazuki-chan looks rather sad.

Argh! Didn’t expect one to be that expensive. Under these conditions, the declaration of surrender came out of my mouth without thinking through.

“Then how much does Hazuki-chan has?”

“I only have 10,000yen…”

So we’re missing 15,000. Including my entire fortune, there’s only 11,699 yen. We can’t even hitting the price of 24,800 yen! The most we can pay is half.

“Excuse me, can you sell this doll to us at 11,699 yen?”

“Eh, I just said before that that we’re doing a business here…”

The reply’s still the same.

“Onii-chan, this isn’t any different from before.”

Hazuki-chan whispered to my ear.

She’s right. Up till now, I’ve been doing the same thing as what Hazuki-chan’s been doing. However, things will be different from now on. I’m not an elementary school student; let’s show her how an adult (high school student) does things!

“We have only 11,699 yen in total, that’s about half the price of the doll, right?”

“Ya. That’s still not quite enough.”

“Hazuki-chan wants this doll, and uncle wants to sell this to her, but you’re unwilling to sell it to her at half price. If so, I have a great idea!”

“Hm? What is it?”

“We can rip the doll in half and sell the right side to—eh? What? Why are you two seeing me as an idiot?”

“…Are you really a high school student?”

“…Onii-chan’s an idiot!”

I, I actually got called stupid by an elementary school kid!

“I can’t give you a discount, but I can guarantee that I won’t sell this doll away for the time being. You can go back to discuss with your parents first.”

Making this conclusion, the uncle ended the conversation just like this.

“Can’t you ask your parents to buy it for you, Hazuki-chan?”

Having walked out of the shop, we came to the park to discuss our plans.

“Mommy and daddy aren’t normally at home…so they would leave the money to one-chan. If I want to buy something, onee-chan will definitely ask for a reason…”

“I see, uu~”

Wanting to do something for her beloved older sister—Hazuki-chan’s heart’s ever so glamorous, it’s way different from my family who sent me to Fumitzuki Gakuen on the excuse of ‘not wanting to waste school fees’. I must help Hazuki-chan in order to prevent her from losing this intimacy with her family.

But speaking of which, what should I do? It’ll be good if I have some more money, but my money’s about to be used it…

“Oh ya! Hazuki can get money if she sells her manga to a second-hand shop, right?”

Hazuki-chan thought of this brilliant plan as her eyes sparkle. It’s true that we can get money just like this, but I think that she can’t get so much anyway. Of course, it’s a different case altogether if I have those handheld games that were confiscated this morning—

“Hm? Oh ya, there’s this plan after all!”

“…Onii-chan, have you thought of something?”

“I can’t possibly get it back it my hands anyway. If I’m successful, we may be able to get enough money to buy the doll…”

Though I don’t think it can work…mm! It’s still worth a try though.

“Okay! Hazuki-chan, can you come back to the park tomorrow?”

“Y, yes. I can come over…”

“Then we’ll meet here tomorrow. It’s getting dark now, let’s go home.”

I waved my hands and said goodbye to Hazuki-chan. Anyway, I got to discuss it with Yuuji and the rest tomorrow.

“Ah, mm, bye bye…”

Speaking of which, did Himeji-san really enter that shop?

<center>☆</center>

“So you want to take back those confiscated items?”

The next morning, in the same classroom, I talked to the trio as per usual.

“I do feel that it’s a pity to leave those things that got confiscated yesterday, but…”

“Uu~mm…ya, but the opponent’s that Ironman. We may be designated as ‘Punishment Inspectors’ if we’re not careful…”

Yuuji and Hideyoshi lower their chin and ponder. Seems like they don’t intend to help me. This is bad, looks like I have to deal with this on my own.

“…I approve of Akihisa’s proposal.”

“Eh? Muttsulini? You’re willing to help me?”

“…(Nods head forcefully).”

Great! Now at least I have someone who specializes in stealth helping me out.

“…Never mind, let’s give it a go.”

“Ah? So Yuuji’s okay with it?”

“Yeah. I just bought that MP3 recently, and I accumulated quite a debt to Ironman, so let’s settle this once and for all.”

Yuuji smirked. What an enthusiastic bad guy’s face.

“If so, I’ll help out as well. If I can get back those things, I don’t want to give up as well.”

In the end, even Hideyoshi nodded his head, and everyone decided to take part in this. As expected of the group problematic first-years.

“Right now, the most important thing is to investigate where our targets are.”

“That’s right. If we don’t even know where Ironman hid those confiscated items, we can’t possibly get them back even if we want to.”

The confiscated items may have ended up being abandoned, but they were just confiscated yesterday, so Ironman should still have them with him.

“That’s the case. Akihisa, remove the silence function of the phone.”

“Eh? Why?”

“Don’t ask too much, just do it. You want those confiscated items back, right?”

“…I’m not really sure what’s going on, but I just need to remove the silence function, right?”

“That’s right.”

The phone can’t possibly ring during lesson time, there shouldn’t be any problems, right? Let’s just follow what Yuuji told me to do.

I pull my handphone out from my pocket and took it out of silent mode.

“Oi, you people better hurry up and sit down. I’m going to start taking attendance.”

Seeing our homeroom teacher Ironman walk into the classroom, I immediately slip the handphone back into my pocket.

“Alright, let’s begin.”

Thus, our battle for the confiscated items officially begins now.

“Shimada.”

“Here.”

“Shimizu.”

“Here.”

At the usual time of taking attendance, Ironman’s coarse voice echoes clearly throughout the classroom.

“Yamaguchi.”

“Here.”

“Watanabe.”

“Here.”

—Beep beep beep.

Suddenly, a beep interrupted the class while attendance is taken. Whose phone is it? Really, do think that we have such a stupid person in class. The phone will definitely get confiscated when it rings in class.

“…Yoshii, hand over your phone.”

“…Yes.”

The problem is, this stupid person was me.

Damn it! Why must it ring at this moment!? Who called me!?

<<Missed call: Sakamoto Yuuji>>

“Yu, Yuuji, you betrayed me!”

“I’ll consficate the handphone then.”

“Ahh! Handphone! MY HANDPHONE!”

My handphone got taken away by Ironman mercilessly.

“Very good. Nobody’s came late nor skipped classes. I hope that all students will continue to keep this up.”

After taking the attendance, Ironman moves his heavy feet out of the classroom—together with my handphone.

“Very good. Part 1 of the plan is complete.”

“Yuuji! What sort of grudge do you have against me! Now my handphone got confiscated by Ironman all because of you!”

“This is a bait meant to fish out where our targets are. We just need to take them back.”

“Eh? Bait?”

“That’s right. I deliberately allowed Ironman to confiscate your handphone in order to find out where Ironman hid those items.”

“Why didn’t you tell me in the first place…”

And if possible, I hope that you can use your handphone as bait.

“…I’m back.”

“WAHH!”

Suddenly talking right behind me. You scared me~

“Oh, Muttsulini came back already. How was it?”

“…Those confiscated items are placed in the staff storage cupboard.”

“As expected of Muttsulini, erasing your own presence to tail people, that truly is your specialty. I’m impressed.”

Seems like Muttsulini went to tail Ironman and investigate where my handphone was hidden. If it’s tailing others without attracting attention, Yuuji can’t do it, and Hideyoshi doesn’t have the skills.

“…But the cupboard’s locked.”

“Okay. So where’s the key?”

“…In the rear left pocket of Ironman’s pants.”

“I see. If so, we have to snatch the ket from him.”

“Ya, but how are we going to do that?”

“No problems. I got a good idea. We’ll take action during cleaning time.”

Anyway, let's attend lessons and wait for school dismissal.

<center>☆</center>

It's finally dismissal time.

“So, what plan do you have?”

As I tried to sneak out yesterday, I was punished to sweep the entire corridor alone. Thus, I'm discussing the plan with Yuuji and the rest while twisting the mop around. These damned guys don't have any intentions of helping out in the first place.

“We'll be using that.”

Yuuji lifts his chin and points.

“A pail? What are we going to do with that?”

“We're going to use that to splash water on Ironman and make him take off his clothes.”

I see. If so, we can then take his clothes away and take the key to the cupboard,

“Mm hm~ this method is simple and easy to succeed.”

Hideyoshi's right. We can't possibly fail. Basically, there's only the last problem to this plan, and that is—whoever going to splash the water on Ironman will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.

“There's only one problem in this plan, and that's the one who's going to splash the water, 'Akihisa' will get pursued by him to the ends of the Earth.”

Hold on! Is it decided that I'll be the one in charge of doing this?

“However, that's not really a huge problem.”

THAT'S A HUGE PROBLEM TO ME!

“Oi, isn't that too strange? Let's settle this with rock paper scissors!”

“Ooh, look! Me and our target's already here.”

“Very good. You got to do your best, Akihisa!”

“...Do your best.”

“Eh? Hold on!”

The trio already wordlessly retreated back in the shortest time possible.

Ironman has already climbed up the stairs. If so, I can only do this!

My eyes have already captured the target, and the relative speed was estimated. The prepared weapon's in my hand, everything's okay—time to attack!

“WAAHH! I SLIPPED!”

Dragging the mop, I deliberately fell forward by letting my feet stagger and aim the pail at Ironman, who's on the stairs. GET WET!

“GUAH!”

How, how is it possible! As expected of Ironman! To be able to suddenly react in the blink of an eye and dodge the splash thanks to his superhuman senses! However—

“WHERE ARE YOU ESCAPING TO!?”

I drag the mop in my hand to where Ironman dodged to. I won't admit defeat so easily!

Phoosh, Clak cak cak.

The water from the pail drenched Ironman, and the pail rolls asie. Mission accomplished.

I pick up the pail and mop that I threw out as I remain mindful not to step on the puddle of water, saying to a stunned Ironman “Sorry, I slipped—AHH, sensei! An encyclopaedia isn't to be used as a weapon!”

“I thought I just heard you say 'Where are you escaping to', didn't I?”

“That's just a hallucination.”

“Stop trying to lie to me with such a serious look on your face. Get ready to die!”

“Sen, sensei, please don't use the edge of the encyclopaedia!”

Where are you guys now! Come save me! I'll definitely be beaten down by Ironman into a panda if this keeps up!

“Ahh, Akihisa, you really ended up doing it.”

Yuuji and the rest appeared out of nowhere. Anyway, I'm saved~

“I told you so many times 'not to splash water onto sensei'...”

“Ow, OWW! SENSEI! I SAID THAT I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE ALREADY!”

They, they didn't help out at all! These damned guys! Are they intending to sit around and watch?

“Sensei, punish Akihisa later. I guess you better change your clothes. If you don't mind, I'll lend my P.E. attire to you.”

“That's right. Sorry, then lend me that. Yoshii, stay behind and scrub the floor clean!”

Leaving these words behind, Ironman, who was drenched by me, head off to the classroom with Yuuji and the rest to change clothes.

“...So unfortunate.”

Anyway, I remained behind to clean the floor up. Besides, I have the cleaning tools in my hand.

Just as I'm working hard to wipe the water off the floor, Hideyoshi walks out of the classroom and moves towards me.

“I got the key, Akihisa.”

“Really? Then we just need to enter the staffroom and get back the confiscated items.”

“Umm, let's hurry up before Ironman realizes it.”

“Got it!”

After letting the mop lean against the wall, Hideyoshi and I quickly head towards the staffroom.

“I'm going in then.”

I took the cupboard key from Hideyoshi's hands and reach my hand out for the door.

“There’s no problem, right?”

“No need to worry. I’ll try my best to walk into the staffroom without raising too much attention and get those things back.”

I should be just an ordinary student to every teacher, except for Ironman. I should be more suited for this role as compared to Hideyoshi, who has the look of a beauty.

“Really? Then I’ll just wait here for your good news.”

“Mm, I’m going in then~ ‘cuse me~”

I open the staffroom door slightly. No problem, I’m not some irritating guy.

“Yoshii? Hurry up and get over here!”

“Why!? Why am I noticed so soon after entering the room!?”

I got caught by the Ancient Literature teacher immediately after entering the room. Why?

“I want to hear what excuse you have regarding the essay ‘translate the Tsurezuregusa[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Translation_Notes_and_References#] into Modern Language’!”

“Ah, I did hand in my homework properly.”

“I’m asking why did you turn the Tsurezuregusa into a rap!?”

“Eh? But sensei wanted it to be translated into the modern language, and speaking of modern Japanese, isn’t it—”

“Ah, Yoshii-kun, remember to come over here after you’re done there.”

“Yoshii, that Chemistry report you handed in was too ridiculous! Come over and explain it to me later.”

Unknowingly, I got surrounded by several teachers. Well, if this is the case, forget about completing the plan, I’ll be hounded by these teachers till night! Got to find a way to get away from them!

“Excuse me…”

Just as I’m pondering on what to do, someone else entered the staffroom. Hm? Isn’t that Hideyoshi?

‘Ooh, isn’t that Kinoshita? What’s wrong?”

“I, I suddenly…don’t feel too good…but the health teacher isn’t…in…”

Hideyoshi cupped his mouth. He really doesn’t look too good. Is he sick?

“Hideyoshi, are you—”

I frantically rushed towards him. At this moment, he suddenly blinked at me. I see, so he’s acting! As expected of someone from the drama club, I nearly got fooled.

“Sorry, but can I rest here—”

Before finishing, Hideyoshi collapsed onto the floor.

“Ki, Kinoshita! Are you alright?”

“Anyway, let’s take him to the sickbay!”

“You, you’re right! Sensei, please carry his legs!”

A few teachers start to create quite the ruckus. After that, everyone in the staffroom left to accompany Hideyoshi to the sick bay. Brilliantly done, Hideyoshi!

“Let’s use this opportunity to get back those confiscated items. Let me see, Ironman…no wait, it’s Nishimura. Nishimura’s…”

I checked the nametag on the cupboards which are according to order. Oh, found it. It’s this one.

“…Speaking of which, I somehow imagined that bugs will crawl out of Ironman’s cupboard.”

Though I’m a bit fearful, I have no time to hesitate. I pull out the key Hideyoshi handed to me and pull the door handle down, opening the metal cupboard effortlessly.

“Oh, it’s unexpectedly clean…”

The cupboard’s arranged rather neatly, and the bag of confiscated goods are placed in an obvious place.

“Let’s get out of here before someone notices—hm?”

Just as I was about to lock the cupboard up and run away, I noticed a pile of old books tied up in raffia strings. Should be meant for throwing away.

“Uu~hm…since he’s going to throw it, I might as well take it. Maybe I can get some money as well.”

After grabbing the books with both hands, I immediately dashed out of the staffroom.

“Okay! At least we achieved our goal!”

After what happened just now, I brought the spoils—the bag of confiscated items back to Yuuji, only taking away my own stuff and the pile of old books. I then took them over to a second-hand shop to exchange these spoils for cash.

My handheld games and gaming software garnered a price lower than what I expected, while that pile of books got quite the price; what a nice mistake in estimation. I really got to thank Ironman for this.

“Let me see, is that girl here~”

“Ah! Onii-chan! You're here!”

Hazuki-chan immediately came running over to me the moment I approached the park. She really looked like a cute puppy, and that even warms my heart. Maybe it's because I'm often surrounded by idiots, Ironman and a violent girl...

“Mm, because we arranged to meet each other. Oh yeah, where did you get that doll from?”

Looking closely, Hazuki-chan's hugging something similar to the Noi doll that she wanted to buy (is that what it's called?). It looks as if it was sewn by hand.

“There was a pretty onee-chan who came over and said to me 'If that onii-chan couldn't succeed, then give this to your sister!' and handed it over to me!”

“?”
“And she also said 'If that onii-chan managed to buy the doll, i'll give this doll to you.'.”

The kid's lac of order in her speech confused me.

Erm, let me straighten Hazuki-chan's words out—

—A pretty onee-chan came to Hazuki-chan today.

—And then, she handed this handmade doll over to Hazuki-chan

—This pretty onee-chan even said that if I couldn't do it, she'll give this doll to Hazuki-chan's sister as a gift.

—But if I succeeded, this doll will go to Hazuki-chan.

—So that's how it is.

“Mmm, is that so? Then this doll will go to hazuki-chan.”

“Eh/ Really?”

“Yeah. And this doll will go to Hazuki-chan's sister.”

I hand over the large doll in my hand over to Hazuki-chan. It should be tough for her petite body to carry such a large doll, she she still received it delightedly.

“This is great! Thank you, onii-chan!”
“No problems. It'll be great if your sister can cheer up.”

I patted her head. Hazuki-chan seems to enjoy it as she slowly closes her eyes.

“Uu~ Ah, that's right! Onii-chan, can you lend me your ear?”

“Eh? What is it? Are you going to say a secret to me or something?”

“don't ask, just lend me your ear.”

Is she about to thank me? I'm really touched. One can't become a proper adult if the person can't even say 'thank you' or 'sorry'.

“Okay, what is it?”

I bent over to match her height, but unexpectedly—

“Thank you, onii-chan♪”

Whoosh! A cute sensation passes my face. Eh? This...don't tell me this is...

[[Image:BTS vol 03.5 043.jpg|thumb]]

“Wha, wha, wha...”

“Onii-chan may be an idiot, but he's so gentle! Hazuki-cahn loves you! When I grow up, I'll let you become my husband!”

Without waiting for me to reply, Hazuki-chan skips out of the park.

Re, recently, these elementary school students are...

I touched my face with my hand, seemingly wanting to wipe away the soft sensation that's left on the face. Even without looking at the mirror, I know my face is red. How, how embarrassing...she's just an elementary school kid...

“Hoo...time for me to go back as well...”

After lifting my bag up and slinging it over my back, I head off towards the exit of the park. While exiting, I see a familiar figure yesterday. That person is—

“Excuse me...are you Himeji-san?”

“Ah, yes, what is it—YO, YOSHII-KUN!”

So it's Himeji-san. It sure is hard to find another pretty girl. I can't possibly be mistaken.

“Sorry, I seemed to have scared you.”

“No, no worries. I was just dazed...”

Our conversation got interrupted just like that. This, this is really awkward...what should I say to a friend who I haven't met for a long time?

“Erm, that...it's really a coincidence that we met her. Did you just finish class? But you look rather tired here, are you?”

“Yes,because I stayed up all night...”

“Hei~so Himeji-san would also stay up.”

The impression she gives is that she lives her life normally, but it's unexpected that she would stay up.

“That's not it, I just stayed up last night, because I got something I have to do no matter what...”

She inadvertently yawned as she continued to talk. Himeji-san sure is cute when she lets out some tears due to sleepiness.

“Then, I'll be going off in this direction, goodbye.”

Ah, mm, byebye.”

I waved my hand to Himeji-san, who bowed to me courteously.

While walking home, I just realized—oh ya, why did Himeji-san appear in such a place?

<center>☆</center>

“...There was a case of theft in the staffroom room.”

The next morning, during self-study period, Ironman suddenly mentioned this. He's definitely referring to the bag of confiscated items that we got yesterday.

“Such a tragedy worth being angry over, don't you think so, Yoshii?”

He actually threw this question at me. As expected of Ironman, he must have realized that I was the perpetrator, but who will follow you obediently?

“Yeah, sure is worth sighing over.”

I naturally replied with these few words. No problems, I got everything under control.

“Really? Speaking of which, that culprit even took sensei's books.”

Hm? Books? Is he referring to that bundle of books? Wasn't he going to throw them away?

“And that culprit actually had the guts to use his own identity to sell my books to a second-hand shop.”

“Is that so, he sure has guts.”

“Yeah, hahahaha!”

“Ahhahaha...”

Ironman and I started laughing with all enthusiasm. Really, we're laughing with all sorts of happiness—at least it lookde that way if not for those eyes.

“YOSHII! GET READY TO DIE!!!”

“So, sorry! Who knew that it was sensei's collection, I didn't—”

“Are you saying that you didn't even think of it?”

“No, I did think about it, but then I thought 'since its Ironman's, it doesn't matter~'! OW! OUCH! SENSEI! MY SKULLCAP GOT SMASHED IN MY YOU!”

“So you idiot has the highest suspicion. Looks like I have to be even more careful and watch you.”

“Sensei! I'm feeling that I've been watched by you all this time, there's no way for you to watch me further!”

“No, there still is, right? I got a really precious title of honor that's suitable for you—“

“Eh, this is...”

“Everyone at the staff meeting this morning have all agreed, so accept this. This is a present that sensei's handing you.”

From who knows when, Ironman suddenly has a piece of paper in his hand. This plain white paper has only a single line on it.

—Yoshii Akihisa.

The above mentioned has been designed as the 'Punishment Inspector' of Fumitzuki Gakuen.

<center>☆</center>

“Onee-chan!”

Hm? Hazuki, what's up?”

“Well, this is for onee-chan!”

“Eh? Isn't this the Noi doll that I always wanted? How did you...”

“Because onee-chan looked so lethargic. Hazuki prepared it for onee-chan to cheer onee-chan up!”

“Hazuki...really, you...thank you, onee-chan's really happy!”

“Schoolwork may be tough, but you must work hard, Minami nee-chan!”

“Hm, I'll do my best! I'll feel like I lost if I continue to mess around like this. And also...”

“And also what?”

“i'm mindful of someone in school.”

“Eh? Onee-chan's mindful of someone? Who is it? How is that person like?”

“Well~as repayment of the Noi doll, I'll only say this to Hazuki. That person is in the same class as me, and he's one huge idiot~”

<noinclude>
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|-
| Back to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Novel Illustrations|Novel Illustrations]]
| Return to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3.5_Fumizuki News|Fumizuki News (An interview with Yoshii Akihisa from Class 2-F)]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

Talk:Itsuka Tenma no Kuro Usagi:Volume 1 Chapter 2

2011-03-25T21:43:08Z

Caolsei: Created page with "Very nice, thank you for the chapter"

Very nice, thank you for the chapter

Talk:Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3

2011-03-05T16:59:02Z

Caolsei: New page: Thank you a lot for your work on Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju Volume 3 Teh Ping.

Thank you a lot for your work on Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju Volume 3 Teh Ping.

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3 The Sixth Question

2011-02-24T15:07:47Z

Caolsei:

==The Sixth Question==

'''Please write down your thoughts regarding this training camp.'''

'''Himeji Mizuki’s comment:'''

‘I benefitted a lot from studying with students from the other classes, and managed to get many beneficial tips from quite a few reference books involving subjects that I’m frustrated with, which I believe will help me in my studies. Though it may be rather loud at night, it’s still our school’s characteristic. Also, I managed to get a great secret photo from a certain someone, I’m so happy!’

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

Himeji-san’s grades for every subject are rather impressive, and sensei didn’t realise that you have subjects that you are unfamiliar with; I’m really sorry about that. However, it’s good that you found a way to solve the problems. It’s really been beneficial for you to study with class A students, so work hard during the next streaming exam. Also, please don’t be affected by the noise that those idiots caused.

'''Shimada Minami’s comment:'''

‘I will never ever forget about what happened on the third night. What should I do? I can’t discuss this with anyone, and I couldn’t find time to talk to that person…I knew about Mizuki’s feelings, so have I betrayed her? But if it’s in terms of liking, I liked him since last year, so I should be the earlier one, right? Arrgghh~! I don’t know what to do!’

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

What happened? It doesn’t feel normal when you can’t even discuss it with your friends. If you want, you can talk to sensei. Since I lived longer than you by a few years, I should be able to help out. But seeing you mention the word ‘feelings’ here, I’m wondering if it’s related to love?

If so, sensei can only say this. Don’t make a rash decision that you’ll regret for the rest of your life. A student’s responsibility is to think, be bothered, and grow up to be an accomplished adult.

'''Yoshii Akihisa’s comment:'''

‘Didn’t expect so many troublesome things to occur, this is really shocking. I lost consciousness on the first day and was carted directly into the hotel, so I didn’t have any memories of it. After that, I got labeled as a peeping tom, and those suspicious stares around me really bothered me. In order to train myself, I tried hard to break through the strongholds to peep inside the girls bathing area, but is this really alright? Actually, I’m really worried. This training camp really made me think about a lot of things.’

'''Teacher’s comment:'''

That’s right.

“Uuu….ahhh…”

Without thinking of holding back, I made a huge yawn.

I want to sleep. Anyway, I really want to sleep. I’m so sleepy I’m about to drop. I would have slept if it wasn’t for the precious breakfast time now.

“I’m so sleepy…”

Beside me, Yuuji’s rubbing his eyes as well.

It’s expected that we want to sleep. We got lectured by Ironman (with fists) into the morning. It’s been three consecutive days now, so It’s impossible for us to not want to sleep.

“You guys are really unlucky…”

Hideyoshi said with an apologetic tone. Is he feeling guilty that only the two of us got lectured? He doesn’t need to feel sorry since he was asleep.

“Even if we’re unlucky, it’s too—Uuahhh~~”

I can’t take it already. I continued to stretch my back. Today’s the last day already, so we got to replenish our sleep during the self-study period…

“It’s useless! Seeing you guys like this, for tonight’s attack, we might have to…”

“It’s not that we’re completely asleep. If we’re motivated, we will definitely wake up—Huahh~~”

Making a yawn just after opening the mouth, seems like the symptoms are really serious. As for how serious it is, let’s just say that even with the sliced salmon and delicious dishes in front of me, it’s unlikely for me to overcome the sleep demon.

“I can’t make it as well, not motivated at all—OOOHHHH!!”

“Wha, what’s with you, Yuuji?”

The dazed and sleepy Yuuji suddenly widened his eyes after seeing something. What? What did he see?

“…Super effective.”

“Ah, you’re here, Muttsulini. Good morning.”

Muttsulini appeared at the door and walked towards us. He seems to be holding something in his hand.

“Muttsulini, what did you show Yuuji just now? He seems really excited.”

“…A magic photo.”

It’s rare for Muttsulini to proudly lift his chest and make such a claim.

“Oh? Can you let me see it?”

“…(Hands over)”

Muttsulini slides the photos in his hand between Hideyoshi and me.

“A magic photo? What nonsense are you talking about? We’re already high school students, how can we be motivated by just a single photo—WWOOOWWW!!”

“Oh, this photo is…”

The first photo Muttsulini showed us is the photo of Himeji-san and Hideyoshi in yukatas.

Dressed in yukatas, Himeji-san and Hideyoshi seemed rather shy as they looked up at the camera, in a somewhat sexy manner, and there’s also a glimpse of the breasts!

[[Image:BTS vol 03 195.jpg|thumb]]

“It’s great to live on this world…”

This picture doesn’t really show that much skin, but why am I feeling all excited? However, I’ll do anything just to get a photo of these two bathing!

“What’s the second photo, Akihisa?”

“Let me see…”

I pulled aside the first photo. It’s a double shot of Kirishima-san closing in while dressed in a yukata and Minami who’s in sports shorts.

“This, this is great! Muttsulini, this photo was taken at a perfect angle! You have my utmost respect!”

“That’s really amazing…to be able to cut Akihisa and Yuuji out of the photo, isn’t this of professional level already?”

This photo isn’t any different from those self-photos sold on the market! Though it’s too bad that not everyone’s in a yukata, it’s still a very viewable photo. To be able to even bring out Minami’s attractive side in such a healthy manner, I can only say that Muttsulini’s photo-taking skills are near godlike!

“And the third photo?”

“Ah, Mm! The third photo is—”

I pull out another photo from below. The third photo that appears in front of me is—isn’t this me in the sailor uniform?

“…It was taken beautifully, so I developed that one.”

“LET GO OF ME, HIDEYOSHI! I MUST SLICE THAT IDIOT’S HEAD APART!!”

“Calm down first, Akihisa! Isn’t this photo taken beautifully?”

Hideyoshi hugged me tightly, not allowing me to deal the killer blow.

When was that photo taken anyway?

“That’s amazing, Muttsulini. When did you take that photo?”

Yuuji’s eyes have regained their vigour as he suddenly praised Muttsulini. For Yuuji to react like this when he doesn’t even show that much reaction to girls, it’s likely that ordinary guy will react a lot more than him.

“Now we just need to hope for reinforcements.”

Hideyoshi’s right, it’s unlikely for those guys to not falter once they see these photos. As a guy, I understand this the most, but…

“…Do we really have to show these photos to the rest?”

Ah~ if possible, I hope that I can stuff these photos directly into my bag.

“Akihisa, don’t forget our initial aim. We won’t be able to succeed if we don’t care about the entire plan.”

“Uu…I know that…”

I just feel that it’s a pity that we have to show it to the rest!

Even so, I know that Yuuji’s right. Our aim isn’t to get these photos, but to be able to successfully peep inside the girls bathing area.

“Sorry, my bad. These photos are meant to achieve our goal, so I should abstain from such thoughts. Besides, I will tell Muttsulini to prepare one gross [http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume3_Translator%27s_Notes#The Sixth Question]for me, so I just need to endure it.”

“Isn’t one gross too much?”

“You’re not thinking of abstaining!”

Stop bothering me, you guys!

“Alright, if so, then—”

Yuuji pulled out a pen from who knows where, and writes a few messy words behind the photos.

‘Pass these photos to all the guys, and don’t let the girls or the teachers see it! If anyone is to try and take these photos for their own, they will executed under the name Sakamoto Yuuji!’

I see, if we don’t write down these notes, these photos will likely be stolen.

“Oi, Sugawa, pass these to the guys.”

Yuuji passes the photos to Sugawa-san, who’s beside our eating breakfast. He receives the photos with a puzzled look.

“WAAAAHHH—”

And the next moment, he’s awake.

“Oh yeah, Yuuji, you should have taken away my photos, right?”

“Relax, passing that kind of thing around will only demoralise them. I did take away that photo of yours.”

“I see. It’s good that you took it.”

If those photos are to be passed out, it’s utterly meaningless for me to even think of preventing those photos of me in girls’ clothes to be spread around.

“Eh? Muttsulini, you still have more photos?”

Hideyoshi sees that Muttsulini still has a photo in his hand. Really, what did he take?

“Let me see, what did you take here?”

“Ah, me too!”

I peek in to look at the photo that Hideyoshi received from Muttsulini.

What’s on the photo is—me in a sailor uniform (with underwear revealed)

“…I couldn’t help but take it.”

“LET GO OF ME, HIDEYOSHI! I MUST RIP THAT IDIOT’S HEAD OUT AND MINCE IT!!!”

“I DIDN’T SEE ANYTHING! I DIDN’T SEE ANYTHING, SO PLEASE CALM DOWN!!”

Anyway, whatever the case, our momentum’s at the highest now due to these photos.

<center>☆</center>

Tida tida—for some reason, the sound made by the second hand becomes really loud. I didn’t really bother about it in the past, and unexpectedly, I started to be mindful of it.

“Akihisa, don’t get anxious right before the event. We got our points replenished and passed the photos over for everyone to see. We already did what we can do, and we just need to do fight with our best effort.”

Resting in a corner of the room with his eyes closed, Yuuji warned me. The more critical the situation is, the more I feel like praising this guy’s nerves.

“The three classes D, E and F will be participating with full strength like yesterday, so we’ll just see if the other three classes A, B and C are willing to help out.”

Since we had to focus on the tests in order to replenish our points, we didn’t have time to talk to the other boys, so we have no idea how effective the photos are now. We can only see the effects during the battle.

“…I must take revenge today.”

Even Muttsulini’s getting pumped. Maybe it’s because he’s satisfied with the photos he took that he managed to answer quite a lot of questions with a lot of enthusiasm during the day tests. Muttsulini’s attitude tonight is already terrifying.

“It’s about time to battle, so let’s get our final battle meeting done.”

Opening his eyes, Yuuji walked over to me, with Hideyoshi and Muttsulini following suit.

“We’re now on the third level, and we have to break through the four areas, third level, second level, first level and the girls bathing area before we can get to our final destination.”

If it’s according to room allocation, the third level will be handled by classes E and F; the second level will be handled by classes C and D, classes A and B for the first level. In other words, our location is the further to the girls’ bathing area.

“Those guys from classes E and F will help out suppress our enemies on the third level, and class D will be handling the enemies on the second level, however…”

“It’s hard to defend fully with only class C, right?”

The teachers will also distribute the forces according to the strength of the students, so without class C, it’s going to be hard to break through the second level.

“However, we can only do this in the end.”

“That’s a certainty, and after we break through the second level—”

“…We’ll have to face Takahashi-sensei.”

“That’s right, as the level head, the resistance led by Takahashi-sensei will be guarding the first level. I guess Shouko, Himeji and Kudo Aiko will be waiting for us there.”

One of the biggest problems in our operation today will be the first level guarded by Takahashi-sensei. Whether we can succeed in this operation will be greatly dependent on whether we can break through this pass.

“I’ll create the space for Akihisa and Muttsulini to break through. However, you guys better be mentally prepared, since I won’t be able to stop Takahashi-sensei, Shouko and the rest for long.”

It’s impossible for Yuuji to stop those three alone, no, it’s likely that those three won’t be our only opponents. Those class A girls will likely be helping out, and I don’t dare to imagine how hard it is to try and stop them.

“If we can’t stop them…”

“That’s right, we’re finished once Akihisa and Muttsulini get pincered, and everything will be over. My remaining life will be ripped apart by Shouko, and Akihisa will be treated as a pervert for the rest of his life.”

“Even if we fail though, it doesn’t feel like anything will change…”

WHAT NONSENSE IS HIDEYOSHI SPOUTING!?

“Anyway, we can only try our best to stop Takahashi-sensei. If classes A and B are willing to help out, we should still have a chance of winning.”

“Uh hm, anyway, forget about class A, there shouldn’t be any problem for class B to join in, right? Their boys, seem to be interested in girls, especially their class rep. That photo should be rather effective.”

“Ah hahaha, hearing Hideyoshi say this, it seems like class A’s rep doesn’t seem interested in girls at all.”

“““…”””

Eh? Why is everyone looking away awkwardly?

“Once we get past Takahashi-sensei, the rest of the job will be yours. Akihisa, Muttsulini, you guys know what to do?”

“..I’ll definitely beat Daishima-sensei.”

“And I’ll have to take on Ironman, right?”

Really, I have never had such a tough battle in all the battles I took part in, because there are too many unknown variables. However…

“…No problem. We will definitely succeed.”

“Mn.”

“That’s to be expected.”

“That’s right.”

“Yeah.”

As long as we work together, we can definitely do something and make the impossible possible.

—Hua hua!

An electronic sound can be heard. It’s the reporting time of 8pm, and also the sound to signal the imminent battle.

“It’s finally the moment. You guys better get ready to give a good fight!”

“““OOOSSSUU!!”””

“No matter whether our opponents are the teachers or the girls, class A or class F, it doesn’t matter. AS MEN, WE’LL MAKE THEM SEE OUR STRONG FIGHTING SPIRIT!!!”

“““OOOSSSUU!!”””

“THIS IS OUR LAST CHANCE! THE FOUR OF US STARTED THIS, AND THERE SHALL BE NO OUTCOME OTHER THAN VICTORY!!!”

“““THAT’S RIGHT!!!”””

“THE FOURTH NIGHT OF TRAINING CAMP, THE FINAL FIGHT WILL BEGIN NOW!!!”

“““WATCH US!!!”””

At 8pm of the fourth night of training camp. At this moment, the final fight to peep begins.

<center>☆</center>

“We spotted them! Those four are the main culprits!”

“Hasegawa-sensei! Let us deal with those four!”

The moment we stepped out of our room, we immediately face off against the girls led by Hasegawa-sensei. Seems like we were targeted right from the beginning.

“Humph, do you think you shrimps can beat me? Summon!”

Facing the two girls who charged forward, Yuuji summons his summoned beast without any hesitation.

They should be class E’s girls, right? If it were Yuuji two months ago, they should still have a chance, but there’s no chance now.

Class E, Furukawa Ayumi, Maths 83 points & class E, Minamoto Ryoka, Maths 77 points

Class F, Sakamoto Yuuji, Maths 224 points.

“Study some more before facing against me!”

““WAAAAAAHHHH—””

Yuuji’s summoned beast closed in extremely quickly and dished out some heavy punches. Just one hit is enough to determine the winner, and it’s impossible for class E to fight when they don’t have any experience against us who have tons of experience.

“Sakamoto-kun! Hold it right there!”

After the two girls got beaten, the leader of this girls’ bridage, Hasegawa-sensei, steps forward. Unfortunately for her though, she’s one step too slow.

“Sorry Hasegawa-sensei, but we won’t let you pass here.”

Stepping between us and Hasegawa-sensei are Sugawa-san and the rest.

“Yoshii, Sakamoto, leave this to us! You guys head on first! Summon!”

“““Summon!”””

Sugawa-san and the rest line up their summoned beasts like an iron wall.

“We’ll leave this to you guys, Sugawa-san!”

“Sure thing! But make sure you beat Ironman! Or else we won’t be able to peep either way!”

“I get it! We’ll meet at the girls’ bathing area then!”

Leaving this area to Sugawa-san, we turn our backs and head off in the other direction, and the brave warriors who won’t back down in the face of a teacher let out loud howls from deep within their spirits—

“MISS SHOUKO! MISS SHOUKO! WAHAHAHAHAAAAAHAAA!!!”

“SHIMADA’S CUTE FLAT CHEEEESSSSTTTT—!!!”

“HIMEJI-SAN, LET’S GET MARRIED!!!”

EVERYONE JUST WENT CRAZY!

“Such amazing morale! We should be able to take down the third level now.”

“This is because everyone’s working together.”

There are four people defending the third level, including Hasegawa-sensei, but no matter whether it’s sensei or the other girls coming over to help, they are suppressed by the boys of class E and class F, so the third level is a safe zone.

“However, the next one’s a tough one…”

“That’s right! We don’t know whether class C is participating or whether class D is doing it alone…”

Seems like there are battles going on downstairs. If only class D is participating, there is almost no time to avoid the teachers already. If we can’t successfully take down the forces on the second level, we’ll be pincered even if we’re to break through this pass, and our efforts will be futile.

“…No time to hesitate.”

“You’re right. Let’s roll!”

The four of us dash down the staircase. Jumping down two steps at a time and rounding around the platform, the scene that unfolds in front of us is—

“Don’t stop us from peeping! Summon!”

“Sensei! Please be prepared!”

“Eve, even you guys are participating in this…”

Chemistry teacher, Fuse Fumihiro, Chemistry 663 points

Class C, Kurosaki Tooru, Chemistry 144 points & Class C, Noguchi Isshin 132 points.

“Class C! You’re here to help!”

Those are the reinforcements that we so awaited.

“CLASS C, CLASS D! THANKS FOR YOUR HELP! WE’LL LEAVE THE SECOND LEVEL TO YOU!”

Yuuji let out a highly motivated shout to encourage classes C and D, who are here for the same purpose.

“WHAT? WE SHOULD BE THE ONES HELPING OUT IN THE FIRST PLACE!”

“IF WE DON’T PEEP, WHAT’S THE POINT OF US BEING GUYS!?”

“WELL SAID, BUT DON’T PULL US DOWN!”

Amazing! Everyone’s so pumped up that they’re shouting all over the place. To think that we mesh well with classes C and D.

“I say, this will get anyone excited.”

“Yeah, what gets us excited more than increasing our comrades?”

The opponents whom we faced off in the previous summoning battles are now fighting alongside us against the teachers and the girls. This is really touching.

“But the girls who were our comrades are now our enemies…”

“Don’t mind that.”

Speaking of which, the second level is clear. What’s next are the first level and the strongest opponent in front of the bathing area.

“Looking at the way things are going, class A and class B will definitely help out!”

“Don’t be so sure. Who knows whether it will be that smooth sailing?”

We head down another level, and the first level is already in front of us. If the two classes aren’t willing to help out, we shouldn’t be hearing any sounds of battle…

“…Help out…will ya…”

“…Fine fine…you win…”

Great! Seems like we won the bet! It’s a riot on the first level!

“Nice! Seems like we can take down the first level—”

“No, wait! Something’s not right!”

We hide back inside the darkness and analyse the situation. But what’s in front of us is the pitiful sight of the alliance of the teachers and the girls forcing the class B boys into a corner.

Class A, Kirishima Shouko, Combined subjects 4762 points & Class F, Himeji Mizuki, Combined subjects 4472 points.

Class B, Kasai Shinichi, Combine subjects 1692 points.

The overwhelming difference in points cause our forces to fall one after another. What’s going on!?

“…End of the line here, Yuuji.”

“Akihisa-kun, I won’t let you continue on.”

“IT’S SHOUKO!”

“Himeji-san, you…”

We got blocked at the staircase leading downstairs. Like what Yuuji predicted, it’s the strongest duo of Kirishima-san and Himeji-san. There are many defeated summoned beasts around them.

“Seems like class A isn’t here…”

Looking around, Hideyoshi unhappily states this fact. No matter whether it’s the combined subjects battles in front of us or the physics battles slightly further away, there’s no sign of class A. So in the end, only class B is willing to help out…?

“To think that they would deliberately set up such a formation, damn it!”

Seeing the defensive formation in front of the stairs, Yuuji cursed. Standing right tn front of the stairs is Takahashi-sensei, and it seems like she has no intention of moving aside. And surrounding her are Himeji-san, Kirishima-san and some other girls from class A. Takahashi-sensei’s role is most likely to take down another who tries to pass this place. As long as sensei don’t move aside, it’s hard to break past this area.

“Yuuji, what about the battle plan just now?”

“It’s alright to use it now, but you’ll get pincered once you get down to the basement. Thus, we need forces to hold them for now.”

The No.1 and No.2 of our school year are here, and Takahashi-sensei’s leading them with double their points. We can’t belittle the rest as well here; the situation here is critical. Most of class B’s boys are being held off by the physics teacher Kimura-sensei, who’s standing in the middle of the corridor, and English teacher Endo-sensei, so we can’t expect any reinforcements from them.

“…Yuuji. Take this punishment.”

“Ugh! Nemoto shield!”

“Sa, Sakamoto! Is this how you treat any ally when he steps up to help you?”

Class A, Kirishima Shouko, Combined subjects 4762 points.

Class B, Nemoto Kyoji, Combine subjects 1931 points.

No way! Kirishima-san’s summoned beast is too powerful. Class B’s rep Nemoto was mercilessly buried without much work.

“Akihisa-kun, please surrender quietly.”

Himeji-san slowly walk towards me with her summoned beast in front of her, and nearby, Yuuji’s being cornered by Kirishima-san.

“It’s hopeless…how can we get past Himeji, Kirishima and Takahashi-sensei?”

“And if Himeji and Kirishima aren’t in the bathing area, there’s no point to peep already…”

The remaining two boys from class B say this dejectedly.

“HOW CAN WE GIVE UP LIKE THIS!? KINOSHITA YUUKO AND MINAMI AREN’T HERE, SO THEY MUST BE BATHING! JUST THAT ALONE SHOULD BE ENOUGH FOR US TO PEEP ON!”

How is it possible for these girls to not bath? Speaking of which, those girls that aren’t around should still be bathing now!

Seeing me getting worked up, Hideyoshi shows a surprised look, and asks,

“Akihisa, anyone can see that the situation is extremely disadvantageous to us, so why do you still not want to give up? You’re a ‘punishment inspector’, all the damage the summoned beast gets will end up affecting you. Even if you want to get back those photos, is there really a need to make such a sacrifice?”

In the end, nobody will change their opinion of you anyway—Hideyoshi adds on.

It’s not stupid for Hideyoshi to say this, since the pain suffered by the summoned beast of a ‘punishment inspector’ will be passed back to the controller. In addition, the situation is already so disadvantegous. It’s better to surrender before the punishment gets worse, right? But—

“—Listen, Hideyoshi. It’s not like this.”

“Not like this?”

Hideyoshi’s mistaken. The reason why I’m doing this is just for those photos.

“It’s true that I only thought of seizing the photos and capture the real culprit to erase the misconception that I was the peeping tom. But after seeing our comrades fall one by one, and as we continued to move on, I finally realised something.”

“What are you saying, Akihisa?”

That’s right. Right now, I understood everything. Till now, I’ve always been lying to myself and making some noble reason to hide my true thoughts.

But no matter how much I pretend, I really have only one aim. All I did up till now were to mask that unwavering will.

“—Even if it’s not a crime that can be forgiven, I can’t deceive myself any longer. Basically, I—JUST WANT TO PEEP INSIDE THE GIRLS’ BATHING AREA TO SATISFY MY OWN LUST!!!”

“HOW IDIOTIC CAN YOU GET!”

It has nothing to do with the blackmail anyway, it doesn’t matter who the real culprit is. Right now, my only wish is to charge forward and peep on that sweet heaven that those girls on the photos are.

“Akihisa-kun, so you want to peep on Minami who’s bathing now instead of me…I won’t forgive you! Peeping is a crime!”

Himeji-san commands her summoned beast. Even if I can’t beat her, I will fight by my belief till the bitter end!

‘This has nothing to do with social views! No matter what anyone thinks, I must live on by being honest with my feelings.”

I called out my summoned beast, getting into position to take on Himeji-san.

But at this moment—

“Well said, Yoshii Akihisa-san!”

A seemingly familiar voice echoes throughout the corridor.

“Who, who’s that?”

My momentum got cut off by half, and Himeji-san stopped her summoning movement as she looks around to find the one who spoke.

“We kept you waiting, Yoshii-san. Those words of yours were filled with your emotions, and I received it.”

This voice, this manner of speaking, can’t be mistaken…he’s—

“Kubo-san! You’re finally here!”

“Sorry I’m late. I was unable to take the final step, so I was really bothered while preparing for this…but after hearing those motivated words of yours, I finally decided to take part.”

“You said you decided, that means…”

“That’s right, from this moment on, the 24 boys of class A will help in Yoshii Akihisa’s peeping with all their might! EVERYONE IN CLASS A, DO YOU HEAR THAT? EVERYONE’S TO SUMMON THEIR SUMMONED BEAST AND MAKE A WAY FOR YOSHII AKIHISA!”

“““WOOOOHHH!!!”””

“WHAT ARE YOU GUYS SAYING? HAS EVERYONE GONE NUTS?”

“Kubo-san, thank you very much! I knew that you guys will help us!”

At this moment, the boys of class A have finally become our comrade. With this, all the second year boys of Fumitsuki Gakuen are participating in this battle. There’s nothing more exhilarating than this!

What’s going on? Why do I feel chilly out of a sudden?

“No, I’m the one who have to thank you. That’s right, just as you said, I shan’t lie to myself any further—even if it’s a love that society won’t accept, it can’t be helped if I like someone!”

“Kubo-kun, please don’t try and prevent me from punishing Akihisa-kun.”

“That won’t do, Himeji-san. We’ve already decided to help him peep. The only force that can beat Nishimura-sensei can’t fall here.”

Kubo-san and the rest of class A’s boys stepped up in order to protect me. Now’s the chance!

“Yuuji!”

“I know! Akihisa, Muttsulini, run forward!”

The reinforcements surround Kirishima-san at such a terrifying pace, and Yuuji himself rushes over at Takahashi-sensei, with me and Muttsulini following behind.

“Didn’t think that the boys from class A would help, but it’s alright, since nobody can get past me—summon!”

Takahashi-sensei’s summoned beast appears in front of us. The nightmare yesterday appear in our mind, but now’s not the time to hesitate.

“Sorry Takahashi-sensei, but we have to get past this stage! Let’s start—activate!”

Under Yuuji’s summon, the platinum bracelet obtained from the last tournament activates. The power of Yuuji’s bracelet is to create a competitive areana. In other words—

“An interference? Well done, Sakamoto-kun…”

“Hurry up and go, Akihisa! Beat Ironman, and lead us to Fantasy Heaven!”

“Leave it to me!”

Activating two different arenas at the same time will cause both effects to be negated. Thus, there aren’t any summoned beasts here. If so, the opponent is just an ordinary girl, and therefore, there’s not much effort required to get past her.

“FOLLOW YOSHII AND CHARGE!”

The other boys follow me.

“Damn it! Though Yoshii and Tsuchiya managed to slip past, I can’t just let you brats slip past like that!”

At this moment, Takahashi-sensei summons her summoned beast again.

“To be able to think quickly, as expected of Takahashi-sensei.”

Yuuji’s low voice can be heard from her. Seems like Takahashi-sensei automatically negated her own field, waited till Yuuji’s field is left, and summons her summoned beast again. Now, Yuuji would be unable to catch up. Since he has to use points to activate the platinum bracelet, he can’t just turn it on or off so easily, and so Muttsulini and I move on.

“Muttsulini, you’ll take on Daishima-sensei.”

“…Got it.”

We hastily move down the stairs that’s longer than the last few, and right now, it’s the largest distance left to our fantasy heaven.

After dashing down the staircase, as what Yuuji expected, Daishima-sensei is—no, that’s also someone else waiting there.

“Muttsulini-kun, I waited for you for quite a long time. I even thought that you won’t be able to make it here.”

“Ku, Kudo-san.”

It can be said that her appearance here is unexpected. The path isn’t wide here, so we thought that there would only be a teacher guarding here.

“Kudo-san, can you let us through? We don’t want to be your opponent.”

“Eh? You’re thinking of this now?”

“Eh? You’re not coming for this now?”

After saying that, she pulls out that familiar tape recorder from her pocket.

“It doesn’t matter already. We have other aims that we want to attain.”

“I see…but even if you say that, I can’t let you guys pass. No matter what, I’m a girl after all, so I have to prevent you perverts from peeping. Isn’t that right?”

I thought we could persuade her, but it seems that the situation’s a lot tougher now.

“Can’t be help. Muttsulini, I’ll assist you here!”

If it’s a battle involving health education, our disadvantage can be seen clearly in contrast to those those. But even if Muttsulini’s strong, he can’t possibly take on those two, right?

“—The plan hasn’t changed, leave it to me.”

“Eh?”

I couldn’t help but doubt my ears.

Stop joking around, how can how beat those two alone?

“…I got a score to settle with them.”

But Muttsulini’s eyes are ever serious. He really thinks that he can beat those two, beat the duo made up of a student from an elite class and a teacher.

“Is it really alright, Muttsulini?”

“…Of course there’s no problem.”

Muttsulini gives me a carefree smile. This guy really thinks that he has the ability to beat them, he knows that he will definitely not lose.

Since he said this, how can I, as his partner, doubt him?

“I got it, then I’ll leave it to you here! However, I will beat Ironman as well!”

Leaving behind Muttsulini, I head on to the end of the corridor. Behind me, Kudo-san and Daishima-sensei don’t seem like they want to stop me.

“Since Muttsulini-kun requested it, I’ll let you pass.”

While passing by, I seem to hear Kudo-san say that.

Don’t ever lose, Muttsulini!

<center>☆</center>

“Tsuchiya, you really disappoint me. To think that you can actually beat a teacher…”

“Daishima-sensei, you don’t have to take action. I’ll take care of Muttsulini-kun.”

“Really? Then I’ll leave it to you then. However, I’ll summon my summoned beast and witness your ability from behind then.”

“Yes, leave it to me, sensei!”

“…Who decided that?”

“Hm? What did you say, Muttsulini-kun?”

“…Who said that a student can’t beat a teacher?”

“Oh my? Muttsulini-kun sure is interesting. However, if you want to beat sensei, you have to get past me, you know? Summon!”

“…Summon.”

Health Education Teacher, Daishima Takeshi, Health Education 501 points and Class A, Kudo Aiko, Health Education, 383 points

Class F, Tsuchiya Kouta, Health Education, 774 points.

“Eh? Muttsulini-kun…what’s with your points?”

“…A human’s belief can make the impossible possible.”

“774 points? How is it possible? I’ve never heard of anyone who can get these marks!”

“(Glares), Tsuchiya, when did you increase your ability to this extent?”

“…No time to waste. You two, bring it on.”

<center>☆</center>

I could feel a summoned beast appearing behind me. Seems like Muttsulini’s about to fight.

It came down to this, and I can only believe him. Besides, instead of getting involved in someone else’s battle, there’s still something that I have to settle in front of me.

“Everyone, thank you…”

The moment I realised this, the words have already came out of my mouth.

I originally thought that this was an unwinnable battle. But with the help of so many comrades, there’s a chance to succeed.

Right now, everything will be over if I can win here.

There’s just a high wall that I have to climb over…

The time now is 20.15, and it’s the best time to achieve our aim. I could actually reach this place at this time, and it’s all because of all my comrades who assisted us. Because of you guys, we were able to create such a miracle.

“I must reach my goal!”

This is the final pass. A few more steps, and it will be the Fantasy Heaven that every male dreams of.

“…You really came here, Yoshii.”

The final enemy who’s standing in front of the entrance slowly widens his eyes, silently getting into a battle position.

“LET’S SETTLE THIS, IRONMAN! I’LL SHOW YOU MY REAL PROWESS HERE!!”

It’s finally this moment, and the final battle of this long training camp starts now.

<noinclude>
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| Back to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3_The_Fifth_Question|The Fifth Question]]
| Return to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3_The_Seventh_Question|The Seventh Question]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3 The Sixth Question

2011-02-19T18:21:29Z

Caolsei:

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume2 The Seventh Question

2010-12-09T11:19:31Z

Caolsei:

===The Seventh Question===

'''Please answer the followwing question.'''

On which year (AD) was the Kan'i Jūnikai system created?

'''Himeji Mizuki's answer:'''

'603'

'''Teacher's comment:'''

That's correct.

'''Sakamoto Yuuji's answer:'''

'603'.

'''Teaher's comment:'''

[[Image:BTS vol 02 217.jpg|thumb]]
What happened? Sensei's surprised that you got it correct.

'''Yoshii Akihisa's answer:'''

'603'.

'''Teacher's comment:'''

Please forgive sensei for giving you an 'X' on seeing your name.

"Morning, Aki~"

"Good morning, Yoshii-kun."

"Ah, good morning you girls."

On the second morning of the school festival, Himeji-san and Minami arrive at school.

My mind is carefully thinking about what to say.

"AH, yes...did you two sleep well last night?"

"Eh? Yeah, I did slept rather soundly."

"Really? Then...did you finish your breakfast?"

"Yes, I came here after eating my breakfast."

"Erm, then, did you have any weird dreams last night or--"

"*Giggles* Yoshii-kun. Looks like you were thinking too much?"

Oh my, looks like I was seen through. However since they were nearly raped, it would be normal to worry about the impact on them.

"Don't worry. It was scary, but I'm really calm, so calm that it's inexplicable."

"Really?"

"Yes, because everyone was alright in the end...and Yoshii-kun came to save us."

After saying that, a natural smile appears on Himeji-san's face.

"Instead of Aki, I suppose it's better to say that we're saved by Sakamoto and Tsuchiya."

Minami also looks rather indifferent. These two sure have guts, I'm somewhat feeling a bit sorry that I underestimated them.

"I'm relaxed now that you two are so energetic. Then, this morning, we'll be--"

"...No abnormalities."

"Nothing strange's going on here."

"Really, thanks guys."

Hideyoshi and Muttsulini also arrived in school. Because of what happened yesterday, I requested Hideyoshi and Muttsulini to accompany the girls to school.l even lent a taser that I borrowed to them.

"There's no need to thank us over such a small thing, and I didn't really help out yesterday anyway..."

"Nope, it can't be helped when you're tied up."

Or it's better to say that Hideyoshi's fate was really bad, such that he was touched on the butt several times.

"Oh, are you two okay today?"

Yuuji scratches his head as he enters the classroom. Seems like he's not too worried about the girls, maybe it's because Muttsulini and Hideyoshi were accompanying them.

"Eh? Sakamoto, you're here already?"

"Yoshii-kun and Sakamoto-kun really came early today."

"We came here early in the morning to take some exams. Hooo..."

I give a yawn due to fatigue. Of course, this can't be helped when I pulled an all-nighter.

"Really, won't it affect the results later? The opponents are third years."

"Seems like it, and it's said that they have some of the best grades."

In terms of how they took action, those two really look stupid, especially that baldy.

"There shouldn't be any difference. The third years' exams are much more difficult, and the battle conditions are the same."

"It's not that, I'm worried that you two may be too weak to take them on..."

Minami's words seem to indicate that she's already giving up. Why so rude?

"If you have time to worry about this, go open the shop, huahhh..."

"You really are not interested with what's going on with the store. Aren't you going to help out with it?"

"I'm sorry, can you let me sleep for a while? I didn't really sleep much nowadays, and my mind's now a bit dazed because I stayed up all night."

No matter what, it's hard to maintain concentrate like this. I'm rather confident in my fitness, so I should be able to recover after taking a little nap.

"Is that so? Then please go and take a nap."

"That's right, leave the teahouse to me."

"...(nods head)"

"Can't be helped. I'll call you two up if you two aren't awake later. Okay?"

"Thanks. then can you please wake me up at 11?"

"11? Isn't the match's at 1pm?"

"I'll come and help during the busy lunch period."

Even though we have only 3 hours to sleep, that's enough for Yuuji and me.

"Then, wake me up as well. I'm going to the roof to sleep. Yawn..."

Yuuji uses his hand to cover his mouth as he uses his other hand to reach for the door handle.

I see, to the roof. The audio equipment that's set up for the night festival is located there, and we won't be disturbed. The weather today is extremely good, so it's good for taking an afternoon nap.

"Then I'll go up and sleep as well. I'll leave it to you later."

I press down on my heavily dazed head as I stand up.

(They're going to sleep together...)

(Can't be mistaken, he's going to lean on Sakamoto's shoulder...)

Well, I might as well abandon all the noises behind me as I leave, or else I'm going to have nightmares

<center>☆</center>

"Then, let's go, Yuuji."

"You're right. Shimada, is it alright if we go first?"

"I can't do anything even if I say no, right? You're going to compete in the finals anyway."

In the end, Yuuji and I only managed to help out for half an hour. As they saw that we were really tired, they compassionately allowed us to sleep a little more. No matter what, I do feel that our classmates are really gentle.

"We'll go over to cheer for you guys later."

Himeji-san's cheongsam get-up today is as ever dazzling. Her charm is definitely one reason why the earnings on our second day increased dramatically.

"It comes down to this. Don't get careless, okay?"

"...(win)."

"I got it. I won't make the same mistake twice. Then, I'm leaving."

"Really, those words are irritating my ears."

After Yuuji and I gently punch Hideyoshi and Muttsulini's outstretched hands, we head off to the arena.

"I thought we might get distracted before the match. Didn't expect nothing to happen though."

"If it's not because they gave up due to being unable use those petty tricks, then it's because they don't know where we were."

"I see. Only those people who want to use the audio equipment would go up and use it."

And the audio equipment will only be used during the night festival later. It's basically a tailor-made hiding spot for us.

"Hideyoshi and Muttsulini were watching the shop as well."

"I heard that the taser is a dangerous thing that can also conduct electricity through clothes."

"It's alright, at least it's not fatal."

I strongly feel that the taser I gave to those two is a forbidden item, and it looks dangerous anyway. Most people would run away in fear, so there shouldn't be a problem.

"We've done everything, and now, we just need to win this."

"You're right."

After that, we remain silent, and walk down the path to the arena.

"Oh, there's quite a lot of spectators."

"As expected of the finals."

My heart paces as I arrive at the front of the arena. I'll be lying if I say that I'm not nervous.

"Yoshii and Sakamoto, please hurry up, it's time to go in."

The teacher in charge of the arena waves to us on seeing us. They even arranged for duty personnel at the arena, the finals is really different from all the other matches we had up till now.

"Then ladies and gentlemen, we've kept you waiting! The finals of the summoning tournament that uses our test battle system is about to officially start!"

The audio broadcast airs a voice that I have never heard before. Maybe the school hired some professional emcees. Since this is a highly anticipated event, it's possible that such a thing may happen.

"Will the participants please enter the arena!!"

"Then, please go in."

The teacher pats us on the back, and moves off to the audience in front.

"These two are Sakamoto Yuuji of Class 2-F, and Yoshii Akihisa Of Class 2-F! Will everyone please give a round of applause!"

The huge rain-like applause descend on us. There's quite a lot of people watching this, and Himeji-san's father would definitely be here watching as well.

"The group that managed to beat the best, Class A is unexpectedly the lowest combination of Class F! Maybe we need to change our rigid view of Class F!"

(Those words sound good for once.)

(Ya. It can also give Himeji-san's father a good impression.)

Perhaps the reason the spectators are giving us an ovation is to promote the test summoning system by showing that 'because of the test summoning system, even those who are weak would work harder'. But no matter the motive, we can't ask for anything better than that.

"And on the other side, we have Tsunemura Yuusaku from Class 3-A, and Natsukawa Shunpei, who's from Class A as well!"

The ones who were called up and appearing in front of us are the Toko-Natsu group that caused us a whole lot of trouble yesterday.

"Though they're one of the few third-years participating, they did make their way into the finals. Now, will we see them display the prowess of the third-years?"

While receiving the applause from the crowd, both of them slowly move towards us.

"Then now, I'll briefly explain the rules of the match. The strength of the summoned beast is equivalent to the grades-"

The announcer starts to explain the rules, and we ignore it as we're already familiar with them, continuing to glare at each other.

"Yo, sempais, have you run out of your bad ideas?"

Yuuji folds his arms as he looks like he's treating the sempais as idiots. He sure looks cool in this situation.

"We're very understanding, we don't want you guys to embarrass yourselves in front of the crowd. However, for your F-class brains, you probably won't understand it."

The baldy-sempai won't give up as he replies Yuuji, taunting us while stroking his chin. Seems like both sides are really able to agitate their opponents.

"Such a pity, I can't understand your words even if you're from Class A. You should polish up your Japanese first, you baldy king of the ape mountain."

"You, you kiddos dare to treat your sempais..."

Both sides continue to taunt each other with a volume only they can hear. Looks like Yuuji has quite a lot of unhappy words he want to express as well.

I also have something that I want to confirm with them.

"Sempais, I have something to ask you."

"Huh?"

"What's your reason for helping the head of teaching staff?"

Hearing this, the baldy-sempai reveals a shocked expression.

"...Is it? Looks like you guys know all about this."

"Sort of, so why?"

"For our graduation. If we're successful, he would write a recommendation letter for us. We would have no need to studying for the entrance exams."

"Really? Then--Natsukawa-sempai, you're the same as well?"

"Sort of."

"...I see."

I slightly nod my head as I end this conversation. This is all I want to know.

"Actually, we didn't need to use any tricks. There's a whole world of difference in level between Class A and Class F."

"ReallY? Since you two went all the way with those things, I suppose both of you are afraid of Akihisa and me, right?"

"Ha! And you dare to say this! Your methods of winning is to use some cheap tricks by making use of the opponents' personalities and weaknesses. If your opponents are us, you would have absolutely no chance of winning."

Maybe that's true, the reason why we were able to win up till now was because we clearly understand our opponents. We can't beat these opponents if we're to use the same trick now.

"And now, the match will begin! All contestants, please get ready!"

After the explanation, the refereeing teacher stands right between us.

""""SUMMON""""

We shout out and summon our summoned beasts.

Our opponents' equipment are of traditional swords and armour. As they have rather high grades, even their equipment looks impressive.

A class, Tsunemura Yuusaku, Japanese History 209 points & A class, Natsukawa Shunpei, Japanese History 197 points.

As expected of Class A , their marks are pretty impressive. If they can get such good marks, this means that their summoned beasts are rather strong, and not swiss cheese.

Looks like these two are rather good with their homework as well.

"So now, can you see that our marks are great?"

"Since this are marks that Class F can never see, it's expected for you to have this response."

Seeing the sempais show off like this, I'm speechless. THis really are marks that they can brag about. Very, strong.

But since they can get these grades, it means that they can graduate with their own ability, since these marks can get them anywhere.

However, they didn't challenge for something that they can definitely do, but tried to wreck our one and only second-year school festival, preventing us from creating wonderful memories--even almost creating a tragedy of us being unable to keep the most important person to me.

"Alright, let everyone see your atrocious marks."

"Tsunemaru, don't bully them too much. They're going to show it now anyway, right?"

The mohican-head sempai lets out an irritaint laugh.

Facing these two, a strong surge of emotions wells up inside me.

Because of these guys, I'm unable to prevent Himeji-san from transferring schools? THIS IS SO STUPID!

"A while ago..."

"Hm?"

"A while ago, a certain girl in my class said this."

"What? She told you how to escape before embarrassing yourself?"

The baldy-sempai laughs out.

Himeji-san's words during the summoning battle echoes in my mind. Yes, she said this.

"She said, "I can continue to work hard for the one I like"."

"EH? What dreamy words are you saying?"

"--I have a similar feeling recently."

F class, Sakamoto Yuuji, Japanese History 215 points & F class, Yoshii Akihisa, Japanese History 166 points.

""WHAT!?""

On seeing the scores on the display screen, both of them are shocked, immediately turning pale.

"THIS TIME, WE WON'T USE ANY PETTY TRICKS! WE'LL BEAT YOU BASTARDS HEAD ON WITH OUR ABILITY!!"

The summoned beasts wield their specialised weapons as they get into a battle stance. The fight begins now.

<center>☆</center>

"Akihisa, I worked hard with you all the way to this extent. I won't forgive you if you lose!"

"I know. Thanks for teaching me. Didn't expect your mind to be pretty good."

"Everyone's good when compared to you--now, we're going!"

Yuuji's summoned beast is the first one to move. Its equipment is a lot lighter, and thus, it's a lot more agile.

"Tsunemura! Leave this to me!"

The mohican-head sempai frantically stands in front of Yuuji. As he was too slow, he let Yuuji's summoned beast get close to him.

"Then my opponent would be sempai."

"Bring it on! I just got distracted, stop getting cocky!"

The baldy-sempai's summoned beast raises its sword as it attacks me from the front.

It's fast, but--

"Sempai, you're too panicky, you know? This simple sudden attack is basically inviting me to dodge--"

I slightly move my upper body aside. This straightforward attack that wasn't even thought through won't even cut the edge of my jacket.

"Damn it, you bastard...!"

Though the opponent reveals his belly out wide as he attacks, he still manages to turn around and swing his sword over.

"Ho!"

I slightly move my body away to avoid this attack, and in this instant, I strike him 3 times.

"GWAAH!"

The baldy sempai barely manages to use his sword to shield himself and takes a huge step back to regain his posture.

"You damn brat, you averaged only about 60 points during the summoning battles..."

The baldy-sempai's tone changes as he glares at me. Seems like they collected some information of our battles.

"Except for this subject, my standard now isn't a whole lot different from what it was before."

"Damn you...you planned this right from the start...?"

"That's right. You're pretty understanding."

I swing my wooden sword at baldy-sempai, who's biting his teeth hard and revealing a vengeful expression. Since my marks are so high, my wooden sword's so strong that it won't break in a direct clash with the opponent's sword.

"What now? Sempai doesn't look so good?"

"You two bastards, you're from class F..."

The conversation between Yuuji and the mohican-head sempai can be heard. Yuuji's light summoned beast is matching his opponent's attacks with his agile moves.

"Can't be helped. Though it's a bit childish to use this on second-years, let me teach you what's the difference in experience!"

After saying that, baldy-sempai's summoned beast moves back. Besides me, even baldy-sempai himself is a lot further away. If even the controller's a lot further away, what's he planning? It's tougher for a summoned beast to do battle if he's standing a lot further away.

"There're some tricks you don't know."

Baldy-sempai said some unexpected words to me while I'm still confused.Now that he said this, I'll be focused on the opponent's summoned beast no matter whether I like it or not. Just as I'm focusing on every single motion of the opponent's summoned beast, the opponent summoned beast looks like it's about to charge forward.

Do the sempais really have some unknown power that we don't know of?

"WOOOHH!!"

Baldy-sempai focuses all his strength. Though I don't know what the enemy will do, I'll take him down before he does anything!

"GO!"

I let my summoned beast charge head on. Though the battle distance is too great for me, this disadvantegeous condition should also apply to the enemy.

"See, you've been tricked."

Baldy-sempai's mocking voice can be heard, and at the same time, something flies into my eye. This...a stone? The enemy hurt my eye with a stone!

"DAMN--IT!!"

That's why he purposely made such an exaggerated action. The witnesses and audiences are all focused on the summoned beasts that's far away from each other, so no one noticed Baldy-sempai's actions. I was tricked!

"This is the difference in experience."

Not good! The enemy's attacking!

"Guu!" As I haven't regained my vision, I can only jump aside on instincts. After that, I can only feel a sharp pain on my left abdomen.

I rub off this pain as I force myself to open my eyes, and what's appears in front of me explains the pain--my summoned beast got cut on the left side of the abdomen by the enemy's sword.

"So you're a 'punishment inspector'? The next hit will be painful, you know?"

After that, the enemy hits me on the chin with a punch, and I can only see blank as my head gets concussed.

With the feeling of the head being shaked up and the burning pain on my abdomen, I feel like puking. Looks like this isn't good...

This unbearable pain makes my vision all blurry, and my consciousness start to sway.

"AKIHISA, LET ME SEE YOUR DETERMINATION!!"

"--!"

POM!

I stamp hard onto the floor and regain my footing.

"Well done, partner. Ready to continue on?"

"...Of course!"

Yuuji's roar helped me. Yes, I can still fight. And yes, I don't want to lose to this sort of person EVEN IF I DIE!

"STOP TRYING TO HANG IN THERE, I'LL GIVE YOU A BASHING YOU'LL NEVER FORGET!!"

Baldy-sempai's summoned beast charges forward again.

My summoned beast has lost some strength. I won't have a chance of winning if I don't settle this now!

"--HA!"

I endure this pain as I let my summoned beast go past the enemy, and then send a kick to the enemy while he's completely exposed at the back.

"AIYA!"

Though the injuries cause me to be weakened badly, it's enough to make the enemy lose balance and allow me some time.

"YUUJI!"

"Ho!"

Yuuji confirms my situation before letting his summoned beast charge directly at the other enemy, the mohican-head sempai.

"DON'T LOOK DOWN ON ME!"

Mohican-head sempai swings his longsword, yet Yuuji doesn't let his summoned beast dodge.

"GOT YOU!"

The blade's about to hit the head of Yuuji's summoned beast. However, at that instance--

CLANG!

My summoned beast tosses it's wooden blade and hits the blade precisely, changing the trajectory of the blade.

"Ugh! OH NO..."

Just as the blade misses, Yuuji's summoned beast lands right at the best position.

"WATCH ME SEND YOU FLYING!!"

The huge impact of the punch moves towards the enemy, as Yuuji's shout is complimented with the roar of the crowd.

"YOU BRAT! YOU DARE TO THROW YOUR FAVOURITE WEAPON AWAY!"

After that, baldy-sempai's summoned beast charge over. I'm unarmed, and the enemy's a 3rd year student, so it's different from students of the same year who aren't used

to controlling the summoned beast, since I can't just take him head on barehanded.

However, if the opponent's distracted, I can still dodge the first hit.

"ACK! WHAT'S THIS--?"

Baldy-sempai's summoned beast freezes for a moment, and this is because mohican-head sempai's summoned beast was sent flying over in front of him. This is revenge for the little stone just now.

I use this gap to let the summoned beast advance. Baldy-sempai's summoned beast missed the best chance to land his longsword since his rhythm got messed up, and so, I can dodge past it!

"CHEH!"

Pulling back the missed sword, the enemy tries to come up with another attack. This time though, it's my turn.

"WATCH THIS!"

I use this momentum to let my summoned beast headbutt him. Though the power isn't great, it's enough to restrain his actions.

I endure the minimal pain on my head as I wait for my partner's response.

"AKIHISA!"

Yuuji's summoned beast kicks the wooden sword that I threw just now right back at me. He's not used to controlling the summoned beast, yet he can pass it rather well!

"I'VE KEPT YOU WAITING!"

I let my summoned beast quickly pick up the wooden sword. With this, it'll be over!

"DAMN IT! HOW CAN I, A THIRD-YEAR, LOSE TO YOU SMALL FRIES--"

"GO AND DIE!!!"

CRACK! A sharp pain can be felt in my left wrist, and the pain spreads from the hand to the fingers, as if my entire hand got sliced off.

The back of my abdomen got injured as well. I can no longer fight on, but--

"Oh, for your standard, that's rather good, Akihisa."

[[Image:BTS vol 02 239.jpg|thumb]]
The enemy's blade slices my left hand--and I managed to use my wooden sword to inflict a critical wound by stabbing through the throat.

"Sakamoto and Yoshii's group wins!!!"

"Gr...eat...!"

The pain corrodes my entire body, and I can't restrain this vomitting feeling for long. However, I'm so happy that I feel like I'm on the clouds.

<center>☆</center>

“It’s been tough for both of you. It’s really impressive.”

“Ah hahaha, not really.”

“Baka onii-chan was brilliant~!”

“Hazuki, you’ll make Aki feel really troubled, you know?”

Minami can only smile awkwardly as she looks at Hazuki, who’s constantly rubbing herself on my chest.

If this keeps up, it would end up being a fatal injury for me. Thus, I politely push her away. Though Hazuki does looks unhappy, she obediently followed what I did.

“Erm, Yoshii-kun.”

“Ah, Himeji-san. Did you see my exciting performance just now?”

“Yes! It was really brilliant! It was so great that I wanted to get a tape from Tsuchiya-san!”\

Himeji-san’s eyes are glittering. Seeing her like this, it seems like my hard work finally paid off.

“Erm…the tape. Did Muttsulini record it?”

“Yes. He was very focused in filming it, right?”

“…(Turning the face away)”

Muttsulini looks away. Did this guy ignore the match and went on to film some of the audiences wearing mini-skirts?

"You did rather well for your Japanese History, Sakamoto, considering that your grades were really bad during the summoning battles."

"It's because my grades were really bad during the summoning battles that I worked hard on this subject after that."

"So you can get such good grades because of that?"

"It's simple saying it, but it was tough for us. Especially since after Akihisa heard about those things (Himeji-san transferring schools), I've been forced to stay back every night and revise it with him."

"Oh...forget about Sakamoto, it's really unexpected for Aki to get such good grades."

"That's because that guy wanted to see what he can do if he really worked hard. Also, it's also a case of 'hard work overcoming stupidity. To be honest, his concentration is really amazing."

Yuuji continued to converse with Minami while their backs are facing Himeji-san. This is to prevent the rest from knowing that we knew about Himeji-san transferring schools.

"Erm, about, about that..."

"Hm, ah, is there anything?"

Himeji-san continues to play with her fingers in front of her. She really looks like a cute kouhai girl confessing to a male sempai.

"I got something to say after the night festival, please come over to the carpark!"

After saying this while blushing like a tomato, she runs off to continue her work as a waitress.

Oh, that really sounds like a confession. Looks like I just saw something good.

"...Eh?"

Suddenly, I feel that something's amiss. What the hell? Eh--who was Himeji-san saying those words to?

[That's you. Yoshii Akihisa.]

Oh my--it's been a while since I last saw my inner devil. You're still trying to trick me with that smooth talk. As expected of a real devil.

[Nope, I'm not lying. This is real. You should know if you think through the whole conversation, right?]

The whole conversation? If so...

[THAT'S A LIE!! HOW CAN A STUPID AND UGLY AKIHISA END UP WITH THIS? I CAN'T LET THE DEVIL'S WORDS TRICK ME!]

"GET OUT, O WHITE ANGEL!"

I thought that it would finally come out now, yet I didn't expect it the words to come out of my mouth!

[Then check it out for yourself. If I'm wrong, go ahead and finish off Himeji-san's cooking.]

[Bring it on! If I'm wrong, you'll do the same!]

I'm sorry, but can you please stop ignoring the host and say it like this? If I have to say it, no matter which side loses, I'll be the one who would undergo this test of life and death.

"Sakamoto, Akihisa, sorry to interrupt you, but can you help out at the teahouse? The number of customers have increased because of your win, so we're really busy here."

Just as I was worrying about how to try and calm myself down, Hideyoshi, who's in a really skimpy cheongsam, comes running over. Come to think of it, what's he wearing underneath the cheongsam?

"Ah, you're right. Oi, Aki! The tournament's over, so you got to do your best and help out, okay?"

"Mm, I'll make up for the lack of effort before this."

"Ooo, i feel so weak."

"Sakamoto, stop complaining!"

"I know, this is for Himeji-san, right?"

Yuuji intentionally looked at me, but I turn away.

Himeji-san, huh? What did she mean when she said those words?

<center>☆</center>

“From now on, the cool summer festival will be officially closed to the public. Will all students please quickly clear up.”

“It, it’s finally over…”

“So tiring…”

“…(Nods head)”

The moment I heard the audio broadcast, my entire body goes limp.

Serving the food to the customers who are coming in like waves, and getting back on standby after serving the food, I’ve never known that a waiter’s work can be so tiring.

“Oh yeah, what did Himeji-san’s father say?”

“Hm? Are you mindful of your father-in-law’s view?”

“Wha? No, no, that’s not the case!”

“She said that she will talk to her father after the night festival, so we’ll have an answer then.”

Hideyoshi answered my question.

I see. Though we don’t know the conclusion, it should be alright. But why am I feeling a bit uncomfortable…

“Then, we’re going to change.”

Just as I’m deep in thought, these even more cruel and unreasonable words reach my ears.

“EH? WHY!?”

“Why are you asking this…if you want to know, it’s that it’s really embarrassing? “

“Sorry, I’ll be back soon.”

“WAIT! CAN YOU TWO THINK ABOUT THIS!? COME BACK!!” (Note: the words ‘come back’ are written in English)

My plea isn’t effective, as Himeji-san and Minami leave the scene and head off to the changing room. What a pity.

On a side note, Hazuki just wore the waitress costume as she went out. One would certainly worry about her future.

“Mm, then I’ll go and—”

“WE WON’T LET YOU! NO WAY WILL WE LET HIDEYOSHI CHANGE CLOTHES!”

I desperately cling my tired body onto Hideyoshi’s leg. At least we can’t let this person change back!

“Wha? What are you doing, Akihisa?”

“...(Nodding head violently)”

Muttsulini’s doing the same thing as well. As expected of someone who’s thinking the same thing.

“Oi, Akihisa, stop playing. We’re going to the principal’s office.”

Our class rep doesn’t look tired at all as he stare at us with a ‘can’t be helped’ look.

“The principal’s office? You two got something with the principal?”

“We got to clear the debt of the deal. Though it’s late, we didn’t have time just now thanks to the teahouse, so we’re thinking of going over.”

Though the principal would fulfil the deal with us, a deal is still a deal, so at least we should go over and report.

“Then I’ll use this time to go change.”

“NOO!! TAKE HIDEYOSHI ALONG WITH US!!!”

“…(tugging slightly)”

“Ah, Muttsulini wants to come along as well?”

“…(Nods head)”

As expected of someone who’s thinking of the same thing, he sure knows what a player should do.

“So troubling. Yuuji, can’t you say something?”

“Hm…ah, nevermind, Hideyoshi and Muttsulini can come along with us. Besides, it’s tough to convince Akihisa.”

Oh, it’s rare to see Yuuji being so understanding.

“Really, even Yuuji…can’t be helped, I’ll change later.”

“Alright, Akihisa and Muttsulini, release Hideyoshi’s legs.”

“Mm.”

“…(Nods head)”

“Sigh, seeing me in such an ugly state is useless, you know…”

I personally feel that that’s not the case.

“Excuse me.”

“Sorry to disturb you.”

After knocking the door and saying some greetings, I push the door of the principal’s room aside.

“I do feel that you two aren’t respectful at all…”

“Really? But we did knock the door and say hello.”

—Besides, I feel that I’m a lot more polite than Yuuji.

“Didn’t I tell you people to only enter after there’s a response?”

“Ah, principal. We came to report our win.”

“You don’t need to tell me that. Who do you think was the one who presented the prizes to you?”

This old granny is still as rude in her tone as ever. I suppose she should understand other people’s plight even more.

“Come to mention it, you did bring quite a lot of companions along.”

On seeing Hideyoshi and Muttsulini, the principal said to us in a rebuking tone. She probably has some things that she wants to complain about.

“These guys were troubled greatly because of what you done, so letting them see the person behind all this shouldn’t merit a punishment.”

“…Humph, really. Then I’m sorry.”

The principal gives a bored sound. She sure isn’t a cute granny; but then again, if she is, it’ll be really troubling.

“Then, do we have to return you the platinum bracelets?”

Actually, the platinum bracelets are different from the gold bracelets that appear when the controller has high marks, since they are worn on the controller.

“No need, you can return it to me anytime later. Besides, I can’t fix those malfunctions so soon.”

“Eh, Akihisa? What’s with the malfunctions?”

“Ah yes, Hideyoshi doesn’t know about it, right? These platinum bracelets have a little flaw, and that’s if this is given to someone with high scores, the owner will lose control of it.

“I see…oh? What’s wrong, Yuuji?”

Yuuji looks like he’s in deep thought again. Does he like to think so thoroughly in this room?

[Come to think of it, how did those guys know that we had a deal with that old granny…]

Though I don’t know what Yuuji’s muttering about, it’s better not to bother about him. Besides, I won’t understand anything if he doesn’t explain it anyway.

“So we had a deal with the principal to use this tool as an exchange for the repairs to our classroom—”

“HOLD ON, AKIHISA! YOU CAN’T SAY IT OUT LOUD!”

“Eh?”

Yuuji suddenly looks extremely serious. What’s going on?

“…Someone’s listening.”

“So we fell for their trap?”

After Muttsulini said this, Yuuji immediately runs over and pushes the principal’s door aside. At this moment, he can hear multiple footsteps.

“It’s those guys…! Let’s go, Akihisa!”

“Wait…Yuuji, what’s the situation?”

“They’re eavesdropping on us! Those guys installed a bug here!”

“WHAT DID YOU SAY?”

“They should have heard everything we just said. If they recorded it, this would be bad!”

“Recorded it? Stop joking!”

If this is to be revealed like this, all our efforts till now will go to waste! The school will lose all credibility, and even its existence would be questioned. If it ends up like this, forget about Himeji-san alone, all the students in this school would have to transfer out! We got to quickly destroy the evidence!

“Hurry up!”

“Got it! Hideyoshi, Muttsulini, come help too!”

“No problem!”

“…(Nods head)”

The four of us dash out of the principal’s office at the same time.

“Yuuji! It’s the Toko-Natsu group again, right?”

“Yeah, I got a glimpse of their hairstyles, it got to be them!”

“In other words, there’re two of them! Let’s split up into two groups!”

It’ll be bad if we split up and get counterattacked. It’s better to split up into two groups and look for them.

“Then tell me the special characteristics of those guys.”

“The baldy and the Mohican-head! You’ll recognise them immediately!”

“Got it! I’ll go and look for them outside with Muttsulini!”

I see. It’ll be bad if they ran off to copy this, so Hideyoshi intended to look for them at the school gate.

“…Akihisa.”

“Hm?”

Muttsulini continues to run as he passes something to me. This—

“The binoculars that Muttsulini likes to use?”

“…For standby purposes.”

Forget about standby, I don’t think there’s even a need for a telescope here in school. However in this situation, I’ll take it as goodwill and borrow it thankfully.

“Thanks Muttsulini.”

“…I love this school.”

It’s because of the girls and the cute uniforms, right? No matter what, we don’t wish for this school to close down.

“Contact each other if we see our targets!”

“Got it!”

After this, we form up into two groups, the indoor group and the outdoor group. Speaking of which, I’ve been running around all over the place these 2 days.

“Akihisa! To the broadcast room!”

We hurry off to the broadcast room, which is the most dangerous. If they’re to broadcast it, it’ll be impossible for shut so many witnesses up. Thus, even if we take back the medium, it’ll be futile. This is something that we can’t allow to fail.

~Broadcast room~

“Excuse me.”

“You, what are you doing here!?”

“Yuuji, there are only idiots who're smoking here and people selling pirated porn DVDs in this school festival here!”

“Really? Then let's confiscate these cigarettes and pirated DVDs and head off to the next place!”

“You're right, they broke the rules anyway.”

“Th, thief! THIEF!!”

~Corridor~

“Eh? Aki, Sakamoto? What's the rush?”

“Sorry Minami, we'll take a move first! We'll talk later

“Ah, wait! You dropped something! Eh—'The Bondage Life Story of a High School girl'..what is this?”

“RUN, YUUJI! I'M SEEING A BATTLE AURA GATHER AROUND MINAMI!”

“Wait! Why do you have this kind of thing?”

“ARGH! SHE'S CHASING US!”

~In front of Classroom 2-A~

“…Yuuji.”

“Shouko! Sorry, I have no time to bother you!”

“…No problem. I can go to the district office myself. I just need to hand the wedding application over.”

“What are you—HOLD ON, I DON’T REMEMBER STAMPING ON IT, NO?”

“Yuuji, there’s no sign of them here. Onto the next place!”

“WAIT, AKIHISA! I HAVE A SUDDEN SITUATION THAT I NEED TO HANDLE HERE!”

“Then see ya, Kirishima-san!”

“OI! AKIHISA! PLEASE WAIT!!!”

As there was no sign of them from the 1st level all the way up to the 4th level, Yuuji and I begin to focus on places that are hard to spot, like the corners of the field.

“Not good…we lost quite a bit of time.”

“That’s right. Where are they anyway—hm?”

Something foreign was placed on the school grounds. What’s that?

“You found it…what, it’s just fireworks.”

“AH, it’s those things that they use during a closing ceremony? Wow~so they place them in this kind of places?”

I seem to have seen it on television before. They would use cloth to wrap it up and put it on the floor.

“EH? Why don’t they have a cannon here to shoot it up into the air?”

“The cannons have to be placed somewhere so that they can fire them, right? Fireworks are still a form of pyrotechnics, so putting them someplace else where there’s no fire is a rule to be obeyed at all times.”

Pyrotechnics, huh? Then it’s no different from dynamite then. The only difference I can see is whether there would be pretty fireworks created or not.

“As expected of a school, to be so rich. To think that they actually prepared such large fireworks.”

“Is this the time to be impressed? The enemy’s about to make their move—”

Dururu Dururu!

At this moment, a cold, hard and inorganic handphone ring can be heard. The sound comes from the handphone in my pocket.

“Hello?”

“As expected of Muttsulini, to be able to see them from afar.”

This is Hideyoshi’s voice. Good job!

“NICE (Written in English again)! Where’re those guys?”

“Inside the new campus.”

“In the new campus? How can it be!? Yuuji and I looked through every corner—”

“No, they’re not inside the building. They’re at the rooftop!”

Damn it! We didn’t check the roof!

“Yuuji! At the roof of the new building!”

I passed Muttsulini’s binoculars over to Yuuji. It’s hard to see the roof from here with just the naked eye.

“Damn it! Those guys are preparing to use the audio equipment over there!”

“WHAT DID YOU SAY!?”

To think that those guys are planning to use the equipment that’s meant to be used for the night festival!

“Hideyoshi! Where are you guys?”

“At the club societies building.”

It’ll take them about 5 minutes to get from the club societies building to the roof.

“Akihisa! Looks like they’re about to start playing!”

It’ll take about the same amount of time for us to get over there. And since it looks like they’re going to play it now, it means that we won’t be able to make it.

Now how are we going to stop them from playing the contents of the recording—

“…Yuuji.”

“…You thought of it as well.”

“Yeah. There’s no other way.”

“You’re right. There is no other way.”

“Then Yuuji, I’ll leave it to you.”

“Got it—activate!”

“You done over there, Natsukawa?”

“No problems. Hehe. With this, it’ll be a reversal win for us.”

“Yeah. Even if we don’t prepare for the entrance exams—WWOOOAAHHH!!”

“What’s with you, Tsunemura—WA!! NO WAY!!?”

“ANYWAY! GET DOWN!!”

BOOM!! Pakarararara—

“You missed! Akihisa! A little lower!”

Yuuji, who’s looking through the binoculars and aiming at the enemy, gives this instruction. Damn it, did I make a mistake on the first shot?

Modern Japanese

70 points, F class, Yoshii Akihisa.

And

UNKNOWN

The test marks are displayed. I heard that the test subject is randomly decided, and it looks like it’s modern Japanese this time. Good thing it wasn’t Japanese History.

“A little lower!”

I remember that feeling, and slightly adjust the trajectory that my summoned beast would be throwing the cannonball.

“Go, light it!”

“Got it!”

After that, I use a lighter to ignite the fuse before throwing the ball of fireworks at the roof!

Whoosh……BOOM!!

The firework ball flies to a place where it would definitely be unable to be thrown at—exploding right above the roof. As expected for a summoned beast which has numerous times the strength of an ordinary human, even throwing is a piece of cake for it.

“Alright! We destroyed the audio equipment!”

“Fireworks are really scary…”

This is Yuuji and my final tactic. We’ll call it the ‘Sure-kill fireworks attack’ (All good kids shouldn’t try this, alright?)

“There’re more audio equipment! Fire another one slightly right!”

“Got it!”

I followed Yuuji’s instructions and aim right this time.

Now, why can I use a summoned beast without a teacher around? It’s because of the platinum bracelet that Yuuji’s wearing. This platinum bracelet is unable to give any special functions to the summoned beast, but it can create a summoning field around the user. In other words, it can replace the teachers as a witness.

“Prepare the next shot!”

“I know!”

The summoned beast holds the fireworks ball steadily. The function of being able to touch physical objects really comes in handy here.

“Here I go, Yuuji!”

“Go!”

“FIRE!”

I use the lighter that I confiscated just now and let the summoned beast throw the 2 metre long fireworks ball with all its strength. I’ve never expected myself to be able to personally get the experience of firing fireworks.

“Alright! We hit the audio equipment! They should be unable to do anything now!”

“Really!? Then we shouldn’t stay here for long!”

“You’re right. Let’s fire another one at the Toko-Natsu group before getting out of here.”

“Mn.”

Yes, we have to get rid of as much evil as possible.

“You got to aim a bit left this time. Wooh, they moved away slightly. Make it a little right.”

“…Here? Then let’s make the final shot! Ready—”

“YOU TWO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!”

“WA!”

The low and hoarse roar can be heard from behind. Damn it! I didn’t managed to control the summoned beast!

Whoosh~……BOOM!

“Ah, Akihisa! You hit the school!?”

“AH! The school’s now a pile of ruin!”

The misfired fireworks hit splendidly onto a corner of the school. The walls and doors is now reduced to a pile of rubble.

“YOU, YOU TWO! YOU TWO ACTUALLY CHOSE TO HIT THE HEAD OF TEACHING STAFF’S OFFICE DIRECTLY!”

Sensei lets out a frantic voice. Looks like this is the first time something this big has ever happened ever since this school was established.

“YOSHII!!! SAKAMOTO!!! DON’T THINK YOU CAN GET AWAY ALIVE!!!”

After that, the familiar low voice can be heard. This is the only voice I don’t want to hear.

“IT’S IRONMAN! AKIHISA! LET’S RUN!!”

“OOH!”

“DON’T THINK ABOUT RUNNING AWAY! I WON’T LET YOU GO BACK TONIGHT!!!”

“SENSEI! YOU’RE MISTAKEN! WE WERE TRYING TO SAVE THE SCHOOL!!!”

“SAVE THE SCHOOL!? CUT THIS NONSENSE! WEREN’T YOU TWO DESTROYING EVERYTHING JUST NOW!?”

“THERE, THERE’S A REASON!!”

Speaking of which, I feel that Ironman’s the cause of all these.”

“AKIHISA! I OWE YOU ONE! THANKS FOR LURING IRONMAN AWAY!”

“DAMN IT! YUUJI, YOU’RE TOO SLY! SENSEI! SAKAMOTO RAN TO THE OTHER SIDE!!”

“I’LL SETTLE YOU FIRST, YOSHII!!”

“WHY IS IT ALWAYS ME!? SOMEONE HELP ME!! HENTAI-SENSEI’S TRYING TO HARASS ME—!!!”

“YOU DARE TO SCREAM THAT!!”

And thus, the marathon with Ironman begins. To think that fear and muscle aches will fill my school festival memories.

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