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OreShura: Volume 1 Chapter 6

2013-08-31T10:18:56Z

Kyon.Rewrite:

===Chapter 6 - The Inside of a Skirt is Mayhem===

[[File:Oreshura_v01_151.png|thumb]]

This item of news instantly circulated around school.

They called it, "Chihuahua’s Dorarara~live performance event". <ref>"Live" it's spelled with "raibu" in katakana, thus is a play on words by adding Josuke's (from Jojo) kiai</ref>

The story of the “Pitiful Chihuahua” made it to the front page of the newspaper.

The next day after school --

I was curious how the two them felt about yesterday’s failure, so I went to the clubroom— Chiwa and Masuzu were already kneeling inside by a tea set.

"Well, I guess we could say it was acceptable!"

Chiwa anxiously bit into some Japanese pancakes.

"Yes, from the perspective of "getting more attention", this could actually be considered a fairly good start, right?"

Masuzu leisurely sipped her tea.

…… Not good. Chiwa didn't gain any experience at all.

On the table, there was a thermos bottle, teapot, teacup, as well as refreshments such as Japanese pancakes—everything needed for traditional Japanese-style afternoon tea was readily available. It seemed like Masuzu brought all the appliances from the staff room.

I put my schoolbag on the table, and sat on one of the folding chairs.

"Anyway, Sakagami’s little brother will definitely remember Chiwa’s name, but no matter how you look at it, won’t she only be associated to a bad image?

"Whether she has a bad name or not, it makes no difference. If he can’t remember the name first, there’s no opportunity to start."

"Is that so?"

"The opposite of love is not hate, but indifference; all relationships of boyfriend and girlfriend start from some kind of emotional connection."

"Ah..."

Well, if it’s phrased that way, it’s certainly not wrong.

"Even so, Chiwa really was too rough and overdid it. She even took the guitar case and swung it around strenuously."

"Really? I thought it was nothing."

Chiwa said this while nibbling and chewing on her Japanese pancakes, her head tilted to the side.

"If you injured yourself again, like you did before, it'll be really bad... like if your back suddenly started to hurt, what would you do?"

"You really like to worry too much. If you keep that up you’ll go bald!"

"...Even if I go bald, I can just wear a wig. But if your back injury recurs, you won’t be able to walk!"

I subconsciously raised the volume of my voice.

Chiwa stopped eating her Japanese pancakes, and solemnly bowed her head:

"I'm sorry, I was kidding. I got too carried away."

"You… as long as you’ll remember, it’s fine."

"Thank you for worrying about me. I will be careful."

"It's not like I was worrying about you."

"......Hehehe."

I didn’t know why, but Chiwa seemed very happy.

Even after I got angry at her, she was still very happy... was this one a maso?

Earlier, I interrupted Masuzu for something, but she didn’t react. She just quietly sipped her tea.

"Hey…… Natsukawa, can I ask you one thing?"

"What is it, Harusaki-san?"

"Earlier you said, all relationships of boyfriend and girlfriend start from some kind of emotional connection."

"Yes."

"So... What is your emotional connection with Ei-kun? Why did you start dating him?"

I could feel my heart pounding away.

This issue particularly has something to do with my notebook, so I did not want to casually enter the topic.

--How categorically will cut this conversation, Masuzu?

Was what I thought, but Masuzu smiled calmly and said :

"Because he saw my panties<ref>She uses Pantsu ぱんつ, in case you are interested</ref>."

From the shock, half of the Japanese pancake Chiwa was eating fell into her teacup.

"Uh... What?! What was that?!"

"Eita-kun~ my very own ~ panties ~ got a clear view of them."

"............Ei-kun?"

Chiwa stared at me with terrifying eyes.

"W-w-wait! Masuzu! Don’t lie! I didn’t see anything!"

"Thus, the criminal denies the charges.”

"Wait, this again?!"

I definitely did not see them.

I didn’t see!

And it's because the wind blew up her skirt and she wasn’t wearing anything.

Even the other time, when Masuzu flipped her own skirt, she did not reveal that particular area.

"Once a Maiden's undergarments were seen, she can't take any other path than dedicating herself to that gentleman."

Masuzu actually dared to lie so nonchalantly…

In either case, you shouldn’t use that kind of language for an excuse!

"Ah, I see. Something like that happened……"

Even though Chiwa’s tone seemed to grow softer, her eyebrows continued to twitch.

This was a habit of hers when she attempted to repress her anger.

"I j-just said it wasn’t like that! The wind unexpectedly blew up her skirt! I didn’t see anything! Because there wasn’t any underwear to see!"

I desperately tried to defend myself.

I didn’t want Chiwa to think of me as a pervert.

"It’s true, she really wasn’t wearing anything! I’m sure of it! Because in the flashing moment when that gust of wind blew by, I happened to be looking at her skirt! I was locked on her skirt carefully with wide eyes, yet I didn’t see any cloth! If I could see her white glossy smooth thighs, I should have been able to see her panties! Though to be honest, it may have been possible that the wind blew the
skirt between her legs… or maybe her panties were tightly stuck in her body! But if… ugh, wuahhhh!"

Chiwa hit me.

She struck me hard with her fist.

I don’t think she had ever hit me like this since elementary school.

"Y-y-you… You big pervert!"

"N-no, Chiwa...... believe me!"

"Ei-kun actually turned into such pervert. As your childhood friend, I’m ashamed!"

Tears filled the brim of Chiwa’s eyes.

I had provoked my childhood friend into crying through my perverted behavior (though wrongly accused).

"Lis-listen to me... Chiwa... I--"

"I don’t want to! I do not want to hear it! Kneel now Ei-kun! I want you to kneel there for the rest of the day!”

I obediently got down, with my back straight.

I took off my indoor shoes, and knelt on the floor directly.

“We won’t talk about Eita-kun’s perverted actions for now. "

Ignoring my plight on the cold and hard floor, Masuzu calmly continued to drink tea.

“Now that I think of it, maybe “letting him accidentally see them” might be a very effective strategy.”

"Huh?"

"It's kinda regrettable, but as expected, gentlemen are actually always fixated in that particular aspect of women. It is a simple yet highly effective strategy."

"Stop joking! Why should I do such shameless things?"

"This is actually referred to as "Panchira"."

Masuzu spoke with incredible confidence;

"Panchira is not about "I'll show it you" but rather about "It got seen ♪", like something accidentally produced by the direction of the wind."

... Masuzu was such a terrifying tactician.

A natural at Jien otsu!<ref>self performing</ref>

"So what you're saying is, if I actually perform this panchira towards Sakagami-sensi, he’ll fall, groveling at my feet<ref>again オトス from "shooting down a target" is used</ref>?"

"It doesn’t matter if they’re handsome or plain or what. Later in the night, he definitely won’t be able to fall asleep."

"I guess it’s effective...... but I feel like it’s missing something important."

"Oh, I didn’t expect you to be so sensitive about it, Harusaki-san."

"I didn’t expect you to be so bold. I heard that you were a dignified ojou-sama, but you're nothing like that."

"Yes, because I am wearing a cat’s fur.<ref>meaning, she looks docile</ref>"

Meow ♪, Masuzu gave out a cat sound.

"Whatever, I refuse! It’s not like I want to use this kind of strategy anyways."

"You don’t have confidence in your underwear? No wonder you haven’t been able to find a boyfriend."

"T-the underwear I’m wearing is obviously very cute!"

Well......

Although this is very sudden, I will describe all of our relative positions.

Masuzu and Chiwa were separated by the clubroom table, both in chairs that faced each other.

I'm on my knees, a short distance away from the table, overlooking the conversation between the two girls from the side.

Because I was ordered to kneel on the floor, I could see… both of their legs from under the table.

Their skirts were about twenty centimeters above the knees, since school rules did not allow anything shorter. At this length, the thighs would not be exposed while sitting, not to mention that area.

However...

Yes… However……

"Wuuuuuuuuooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"W-what the?! What’s wrong Ei-kun?!"

Shocked, Chiwa turned around and looked at me.

"N-n-n-no-nothing! Nothing! There’s nothing wrong!"

"If it’s nothing, then be quiet!"

Just, just now...

Only for a split-second, Masuzu lifted her own skirt…

Under the table, I could see a slimmer of brilliant, dazzling white thighs.

I was absolutely sure that it was proof. Masuzu was teasing me, and she definitely let me see it intentionally. She is even sticking her tongue out.

Chiwa did not notice this extraordinary situation and continued to talk with Masuzu.

"Well, aren’t there any better combat strategies?"

"Ehh...... That would be troubling. After all without using a woman’s most powerful weapons?"

Masuzu leaned her right hand on her cheek, and gave off the appearance of being contemplative.

Her left hand grabbed her skirt.

"Woouahauuaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"Didn't I tell you to keep quiet!?"

Chiwa forcibly pounded on the table.

"It's about time you stop, Ei-kun. Would you rather go kneel in the hallway?"

“S-S- Sorry! I-I’ll listen!"

She did it again...

This time, Masuzu clutched the edge of her skirt, and wavered back and forth as if to seduce me with her dangling clothes.

Her plump and full thighs were faintly discernible on the chair.

I unconsciously leaned forward.

That was too shameful!

"Why don't you just let me see that notebook?”

"No, I can’t let you see "His" final wishes."

"Tsk, you cheapskate!"

"......!"

The third time, I managed to hold back the sound of my surprised cry, and restrained myself.

By now, she was in quite a risky position.

It was rather dim underneath the table, so it was difficult to see clearly. But you could just barely make out perfectly clear white thighs, exposed nearly all the way.

That's strange.

Too strange...

Generally speaking, at that length revealed, at least, one should be able to see the underwear “inside”, right?

But since I can’t see it, does that mean she's--!!

I looked up, and realized Masuzu was also looking at me.

This was the so-called “talking with your eyes”. Masazu’s ice-cold eyes seemed to say to me :

——How is it? Did you see it?

I stared back at Masuzu, and replied likewise with wide eyes :

——I didn’t see it!

——Oh, not enough?

——That's not what I'm talking about!

——Then I’ll lift it higher then.

——Idiot! That would be too bad!

——But you said you couldn’t see, right?

——Even if I couldn’t see it, if you kept going, I’d see something totally different!

"Ei-kun, what are you doing?"

At the sound of Chiwa’s voice, I sprang up.

"Wuahh!", I even cried out.

Such disgrace.....

"What have you two been doing? You’ve been staring at each other for a while now."

"N-n-no-nothing!"

"Right, we haven’t been doing anything."

Masuzu calmly smiled and said,

"Mutual lovers will stare at each other; it’s only natural."

"I don’t think so? Ei-kun seems to be shocked with tears in his eyes."

"It must be because he’s not accustomed to kneeling, so he got cramped."

"......Ah, right."

Although she nodded, Chiwa looked as if she didn’t believe this explanation.

However, Chiwa is Chiwa. She probably hasn't begun to perceive that we weren’t a normal loving couple.

<center>♦</center>

A few minutes later, Chiwa went to the bathroom. I took advantage of this opportunity and violently asked Masuzu:

"W-wh-what was with that scene?"

Masuzu put out her checks and in an unusual pouting expression said:

"That's because Eita-kun is still accusing me of "not wearing any".

It was rare to see her childish expression.

I found myself lost gazing her.

"Still, how could you do that right in front of Chiwa!?"

"But you were very happy, right?"

"I... wasn’t happy! Chiwa would kill me for it! The anger from before was the real thing!"

"So even our grade’s top ranking student still gets tamed by his childhood friend"

Masuzu smiled and said:

“Harusaki-san just mentioned something earlier -- can I ask about it?"

"What is it?"

"Why are you and Harusaki-san so close to each other?"

"Because she is my childhood friend."

"That’s not the real 'reason', right?"

Masuzu smiled wryly.

"There are many people out there who "have been friends with and lived together since they were little". Is Harusaki-san the only one you’re still together with?"

"Even if you say something like that......"

Honestly, I can only say it happened naturally.

Or was it because I lived very close to her house?

It doesn't matter how much I think about it, a 'reason' seems out of reach.

"It was just like what I said before--"

Masuzu momentarily interrupted me:

"I was a little worried that Harusaki-san will not come to the clubroom, because of the thing that happened yesterday. Maybe she would even start talking about the requirements for withdrawing from a club. I even thought about how to persuade her to stay -- but when I came to the clubroom, I saw her already drinking tea seriously. Already looking forward."

"So it was like that, after all......"

The fact that Masuzu thought like that was not at all surprising.

Despite thinking back of yesterday’s chiri, Dora, and sankyu… Chiwa still acted as though nothing had happened, although she was presumably very frustrated last night. If it were me, I have would been depressed for an entire week. <ref>references to the previous chapter, "chiri" from Red Hot Chili Peppers, "Dora" from Jojo and sankyu from the engrish</ref>

But--

"Chiwa would never give up."

I conclusively said.

"Why?"

"She has never given up anything related to club activities. As long as her goal hadn’t been reached, she would never quit."

I simply explained to Masuzu why Chiwa had to quit the Kendo Club.

One year, near summertime, she was caught in an accident and was forced to abandon her goal.

Even so, her cheerful nature did not change, and she still throws herself passionately after new goals.

"So that was the story, huh..."

Masuzu sighed, nodded, and said:

"I understand the 'reason' now."

"Huh?"

"Eita-kun and Harusaki-san can carry on, now that you have a reason."

"Eh?"

No one said anything like that.

At this point, Masuzu gently wrapped her arms around my back.

Her soft body rubbed against me without a hint of shyness.

Her breasts under her uniform squeezed in, her ribbon lost shape from the pressure, and my breath instantly stopped.

"But, do not forget."

Masuzu’s small red mouth opened and closed.

"Don’t forget, Eita-kun. Right now you're my 'boyfriend'."

I swallowed.

"B-B-but a-a-aren't I a 'fake'?"

"You are a fake, however you are still 'mine', do not misunderstand that. That's why--"

"Don’t be so kind to other girls right in of me."

I realized I was sweating on my back.

It was still a long way before summer.

"................... You, just how much of that was real?"

"How much?"

She pulled her body away from me, and smiled.

"Absolutely Everything. A·b·s·o·l·u·t·e·l·y · E·v·e·r·y·t·h·i·n·g was fake."

This is...

This… Just what type of woman is she?

[[File:Oreshura_v01_168.png|thumb]]

Natsukawa Masuzu.

High School freshman, Eita’s girlfriend(?)

Sharp tongue, a kikokujisho <ref>returnee from abroad</ref>.

Favorite quote: "I won't stop hitting you until you cry" <ref>君が泣くまで殴るのをやめない , A quote from Jonathan in part 1, when he fights Dio with in order to restore Erina's honor (chapter 4)</ref>

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===Notes===
<references/>

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| Back to [[Ore_no_Kanojo_to_Osananajimi_ga_Shuraba_Sugiru:Volume 1 Chapter 5|Chapter 5]]
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| Forward to [[Ore_no_Kanojo_to_Osananajimi_ga_Shuraba_Sugiru:Volume 1 Chapter 7|Chapter 7]]
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<noinclude>
 
----

OreShura: Volume 1 Chapter 5

2013-08-30T18:51:47Z

Kyon.Rewrite:

===Chapter 5 - Light Music is Mayhem===

[[File:Oreshura_v01_125.png|thumb]]

The next day, during lunch break time:

While eating lunch, I narrated in great detail what happened yesterday. Kaoru stared with wide eyes:

"Oh, that’s really an unexpected development."

Kaoru was right.

The fact that I got a girlfriend was a ridiculously abnormal event.

Yet I never thought that I, famous for always going home after school, would be attending club activities…

"Do you know who is the advisor? If there isn't one, it isn't possible to do any club activities, right?"

“She’s the Classical lesson's teacher Itotani-sensei. Last year she was the instructor of the tea ceremony club, but after the third-years graduated, the club was shut down. We heard she wasn’t very busy, and it worked out that our club could take over the tea ceremony club. " <ref>The advisor's name is 糸谷 in Kanji.</ref>

"Then how did you explain to the teacher the club activities?"

"For the purpose of re-discovering the true appearance of the Japanese maiden, to transform Hanenoyama high school students into dignified, pure, upright, and beautiful girls, learning etiquette or maybe courtesy, etc..."

I listened to Masuzu explain this to the teacher, but I was completely bewildered.

Well, forget it. It was just a spectacle of words.

"Our club activities will have the purpose of making us popular and pleasing everyone, fuhuhuhu~"tehe☆ Now that certainly wasn’t a proper thing to say.

Besides, there was also a more important unresolved priority: whether my notebook would be leaked to Chiwa.

I later asked Masuzu why she had to bring in all this nonsense--

"No special reason. This is just more interesting."

"This diary is full of very interesting subjects... I can clearly sense Eita’s extraordinary talentAura."

"But worry do not, I will not disclose the contents of the diary to Harusaki-san, nor will I let her know that this is in fact your personal diary."

"I promise you, in case this should ever happen, I will lift you from your role of 'boyfriend'Fake."

Well, since she said so, there’s no harm in believing that for now.

But it was impossible to get rid of the lingering unease.

"Having said that, Natsukawa-san’s initiative is really amazing yeah."

"Yeah, I was actually surprised."

In fact, in merely one day spent she found an advisor, applied and settled a club, furthermore she dragged Chiwa into the group. I didn’t expect such power from an ojou-sama.

Incidentally, Masuzu was still not yet in the classroom, and I hadn’t heard that she would go to the student cafeteria... so where was she eating lunch?

"Oh right, what about Chihuahua-chan<ref>Kaoru's nickname for Chiwa</ref>?"

"It looks as if she is truly burning with fighting spirit......"

Even though it seemed like we hadn’t spoken in ages, Chiwa came over last night for dinner.

The dish was Ginger Roast pork, and she continuously refilled her rice bowl three times.

"Even though it's really irritating to be lectured by that woman, I also got to hear something good."

"I want to steal the secret, to be more popular than Natsukawa.... I will absolutely show you!"

Chiwa splattered rice while talking excitedly, looking very happy.

Probably, it's that.

Ever since she was unable to practice Kendo, I think she had too much energy waiting to be spent.

Moreover, she often said she was "looking for new things to get into".

Hehe.

"Somehow, doesn't Eita look extremely pleased right now?"

"Don’t say stupid things. You forced me to reduce study time and I find it very troubling."

However, the expression on my face answered differently.

In fact, Kaoru was completely right. I am a little bit... happy.

Yet it's not because I was taking part in a new club.

Rather, watching Chiwa repeatedly try her hardest -- it doesn’t feel bad.

"Having said that, being sandwiched in between two girls is very hard, too." Kaoru said with a wry smile.

"Yeah, only you can understand me."

"Of course, because we’re best friends."

This kind of empathetic feeling is something I also want to reach with my "girlfriend" and "childhood friend".

I eagerly look forward to it!

<center>♦</center>

After school --

There was a hanging scroll written in calligraphy by Masuzu hanging in front of the clubroom door.

Our Jien Otsu club<ref>自演乙 or Self-Recreation Club</ref> is finally ready to start activities.

"Harusaki-san, are you ready?" Masuzu asked.

Masuzu was wearing snowy white clothes as a cloak, which she mysteriously obtained from who knows where, with one hand holding my notebook, looking as if she were a teacher. The style of dress was utterly well suited to her. As expected, beauties can do things like that.

"Young maidens’ self-recreation, let’s start!"

Chiwa muttered with discontent, but nevertheless knelt onto a seat cushion. Like a true experienced kendo practitioner, her back was diligently straight, and her posture was excellent.

I followed and sat cross-legged on a folding chair, not far from the two girls.

"To start, let’s agree on a goal."

"Goal?"

"First, we target the person you want as your boyfriend. To put it simply, "who do you to make fall<ref>オトス , as in, taking down a target</ref>?""

"Becoming popular without that... isn't possible?"

"I believe setting a goal will make it easier to obtain results from the training."

"......But even if you want me to suddenly pick someone..."

She said, then Chiwa briefly glanced towards me.

What is it?

Is she going to ask for my advice about it?

"That’s right, it’s a rather good thing to have a goal. Well, do have anyone you are troubled over?"

"Ah… How could I have… uh?"

Chiwa bowed her head.

Ehhhhh…

She didn’t like any boy in particular, yet she still wanted to be popular?

This totally exhausts the point of having a goal.

"Don’t think too hard, it’s alright to start with those you think of as friends."

Chiwa bent her head down for a while and said,

"Well..."

She then looked up and continued,

"......Sakata from Men's Basketball? He’s a senior. I always hear the girls in our class discussing how handsome he is."

Sakata?

Does the men's basketball club have a senpai with that name?

"Do you mean Sakagami-senpai? The Third-year."

"Ah, r-right, that’s him."

So it turned out to be that senior?

If it’s really him, even I know his background. He’s going to participate in the High School Interhigh Sports Competition, and he’s the ace of Hanenoyama High School’s basketball team. He is very tall, good-looking, and is definitely considered "THE popular” male senior.

"But he is practically an unattainable flower, is that a problem?"

"Yeah, I definitely...... don’t recommend him." Masuzu said, vaguely.

I was a bit surprised.

I thought she would say, “ambitious goals are very good”.

"...No wait, actually this is very convenient."

She went on, as if putting aside her earlier hesitation. She wildly nodded and said, "Sakagami’s younger brother is in our class. It might be easier to use him to introduce yourself."

"Maybe you can even get him to tell his brother that there is "a very cute girl" in his class.

Even after all the trouble of finally picking a target, Chiwa’s expression still looked particularly unhappy.

"......Well, I guess I can settle for the Sakashita-senpai as a goal."

"You mean Sakagami, right?"

"Ah, right, it’s Sakagami-senpai."

How did her enthusiasm suddenly disappear?

Just yesterday, she was so vigorously spirited.

"Well, since we’ve agreed on a goal— we’ll begin the first day of the lecture."

Masuzu stood in front of a whiteboard (which she got from who knows where), and said:

"First we’ll read aloud "his" diary, so please pay attention and listen."

Huh?

I couldn’t help but be taken aback ... yet Masuzu’s eyes glanced at me with a smile, and told me "don't you worry".

...Well, I’ll believe you for now.

'''May 28 - Clear'''

"I want to introduce my partners – my guitar and Western music, as well as the rhythm of the soul."

Today, I carried my partners out with me.

They are me. Regardless of the time, I can’t let go, pass them away, or substitute them with false avatars.

It is the GUITAR! It is engraved as my soul partner.

When I carry the guitar, I look precisely like an artist.

The eyes of people passing on the street look at me differently.

That’s because they see an artist's eyes - looking forward in the line of sight.

Exposed to this ardent gaze, my partner and I become burning fire, hot, hot.

But my expression has always been KOOL.

Because -- no it’s not like that?

KOOL face × HAT soul = ∞ <ref>Kool (Cool) & Hat (Hot) are there, meant as typos</ref>

If it’s not like that, you can’t make real music --

Come on, today we’re opening the prelude of a live performance!

Let the dispirited school -- heat up now!

"Ku- oooooooooooouuuu-" <ref>yes, this is Eita's death scream</ref>

This is ...

T-this is sooooo ...

Masuzu really did follow our agreement, as she had made subtle changes, deleting specific terms, so one couldn’t tell that I wrote the diary.

She did this very well, and I wanted to praise her.

B-but...

But…

Aaaaaaaaaggghhhhhhhhhhh…

"Hey, Hey, Ei-kun! Are you okay?"

I found Chiwa shaking my shoulder.

"Yeah I’m fine, Chiwa, haha, what’s wrong? You look so surprised."

"Because you suddenly started banging your head on the wall! Eh! You… you’re bleeding!"

Chiwa quickly took out a red disinfectant fluid and a gauze from her bag. It seems she had developed a habit of carrying first-aid since participating in the Kendo Club. She was very practiced and skilled with treating my injury.

“Would Ei-kun like to go to the school infirmary? "

Masuzu was also surprisingly caring.

-- Oh wait, wasn’t she the one guilty for this?!

Damn.....

I never imagined that reading the notebook in front of others would have such great destructive power.

It really exceeded my expectations.

Maybe it really will affect my life.

I have to hurry and make Chiwa popular, and then stop the club activities, otherwise...

"S-sorry, I’m fine! We can keep going."

Masuzu nodded, and stood again in front of the whiteboard.

"The point of this diary entry is – ‘people who are in a band, are popular’! In particular: the guitar. In fact, ninety-seven percent of high school boys who start to learn the guitar do so to become “popular”. The investigation data is very clear; in other words, the guitar has a very good effect on popularity. Of course, this also applies to high school girls."

Although Masuzu calmly sneaked in some false rumors, I have to agree that her claims might have some truth even though she inverted the reasoning.

People who play in bands are really popular. But is this because "bands make people popular" or just because "popular people play in bands?" Which of these, I am not quite sure.

"But what if I can’t play the guitar?"

"Then what can you play?"

Chiwa tilted her head to the side and said:

"Ehhh.................................... the Shinai<ref>the bamboo sword used in Kendo</ref>?"

"The Shinai is not a musical instrument."

"Eh? But they make a sound when you hit with them."

"What kind of pitch is that?"

"Face hit ♪ Face hit ♪ <ref>In Kendo, you have to yell the body part you are attacking, here she is referencing here mask (men) gets hit</ref>"

"How you can say that so casually?!"

Masuzu tapped her baton on the whiteboard and said:

"It's alright even if you can’t play."

"Eh?"

"You just have to look as if you know how to play. You’ll have no chance to perform during school anyways. "

"That’s right..."

"For a while, the "air guitar" was really fashionable<ref>Air Guitar is where one pretends to play a guitar. Google it, there are even championships for it</ref>, right? That’s the best evidence that if you want to be popular, you don’t actually need to make music."

Masuzu pulled out a guitar case from behind the whiteboard.

It was a huge, hard, black-colored case.

"Here, this is for you."

Chiwa took the box, flipped it around and rolled her eyes:

"There’s no guitar in here?"

Masuzu shrugged, as if to mean, "What is this child saying?" with her body language. She asked, "If we put it in, wouldn’t it be too heavy?"

"......"

"Please carry this case with you. As a guitar player would say, a guitar is the equivalent of one’s own body, right, Eita-kun?"

"S- Sure."

In the notebook, it was written like that.

Though in reality, I know nothing about the guitar.

My diary entry was entirely based on the idea, "If I could play the guitar". You could say it was a type of psychological preparation or vision for the future... or well… maybe a kind of ideal dream narrative.

Ugh.

No...

"Waaahhhhhhhhh! If you jump from that window, you’ll be killed!"

"What is wrong with you?! Calm down, Ei-kun!"

I finally gave up on the idea of suicide with Chiwa’s attempts to calm me.

Masuzu cleared her throat and said,

"If anyone wants to touch this case, just angrily rebuke them, "Do not defile my soul!" or "Let go of your dirty hands!" Characteristic irritability is a distinctive trait of a guitarist."

That was a seriously prejudiced stereotype.

"But the inside is empty, right?"

"Well, if you put a guitar in, won’t it be too heavy?"

"......"

Chiwa wore an indescribable expression on her face, while staring at the case.

"Also, you have to completely belittle traditional Japanese music."

"W-why is that?"

"This is the predisposition of the guitarist. Listening to traditional music is scum, trash, dirty bugs! You need to have this kind of mental preparation, especially while listening to Johnny or AK. <ref>These are jpop artists. Johnny is probably Johnny Kitagawa & AK Akemi Krivit</ref> The moment you hear this kind of music, let your ears rot, acknowledge that."

Huh?

Does Masuzu really have an irreconcilable hatred of traditional Japanese music?

"Will this really make me popular?"

Chiwa said, wrinkling her eyebrows.

It seemed like she finally began to feel suspicious.

"Of course, "his" notes are more perfect than the Bible."

Even faced with doubtful questions, Masuzu was unwavering.

"Hatred of traditional music and love of Western music is an unconditional requirement for a guitarist."

"I’ve never listened to Western music, and I don’t know any singers."

"Not singers. They’re called "artists"<ref>Chiwa was using the japanese term for singer [ 歌手 ] , Masuzu corrects her with the English one</ref>."

Masuzu carefully corrected the details.

"Don’t worry, if someone asks which artists you like, just pick a name from the Stands of Jojo’s Bizarre Adventures Part IV, as famously recorded in the notebook."

"......"

Please forgive me, Araki Hirohiko-Sensei<ref>creator of Jojo</ref>.

"Oh..., by the way, what's "JoJo"?"

"Ehh?!"

Masuzu stared at Chiwa with a stunned expression:

"You’re saying you do not know of JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure?"

"Nope. Does it have something to do with a Yakiniku Shop?"

"............"

Masuzu sighed deeply.

Does this mean that, despite her appearance, she loves shounen manga just like how Chiwa likes shoujo manga?

"I finally know the reason why you are unpopular, Harusaki Chiwa. Someone who doesn't know Jojo is at the same level of the Peking Man<ref>a fossil, believed to be among the first evolutionary stages of the human man</ref>."

"Do- don't say stupid stuff! I’m fully-fledged Japanese!"

No, you should be throwing a tsukkomi to the "primitive man" part <ref>A little detail, by "Peking Man" Chiwa didn't understood that she was being called primitive, she merely understood that she was being called "someone from Peking"</ref>.

"If you wish to claim things that you’re a Japanese person living in the modern era, please finish reading JoJo first. Popular or not, this is where it starts."

"JoJo turned out to be such an important factor......"

Chiwa dejectedly hung her head.

But only for a few seconds.

"I know, I’ll stop by the bookstore to buy them on the way home!"

Her hair abruptly flicked up as she lifted her head, her pupils flaring up again with excitement.

"Originally, I wanted you to read it all from the beginning of the first part, but since we are actually concerned with the fourth part, get volumes twenty-nine to forty-seven. A single set is four hundred ten yen, so altogether that’s a total of 7790 yen."

"That’s so expensive! I only get five thousand yen in allowance every month!"

"Please understand the point. In order to be popular, one surely will need money."

"Really, this so-called love... it depends on how much money......"

Chiwa's eyes had a faraway look.

Yare yare<ref>A type of sigh, also regularly used by Jojo main characters</ref>…

"Don’t worry, Chiwa, if it's JoJo I have all volumes, I'll lend them to you."

"T-thank you, Ei-kun~!"

Chiwa looked exactly like a puppy that had been fed a treat, and excitedly moved closer to me.

"If you really liked what you read, be sure to get your own copy afterwards, okay?"

Masuzu urged her to do so. It was evident that she was a hard-core fan of JoJo.

After that, we talked about the details of the popularity-operation to be carried out the next day.

<center>♦</center>

The next day after school --

"Hey, hey -- Ei-kun."

While holding the guitar case, Chiwa came to our classroom.

"Hey -- isn't it Chiwa? Why did you bring a guitar with you today?"

"This is, of course, my soul! The guitar is my soul."

Chiwa and I were reciting our lines word-by-word.

As for Masuzu, she sat next to me, completely indifferent to us while writing the day-duty log. If there were any problems, if anything wrong happens, she'll add herself and follow through the situation.

Sakagami-senpai’s little brother sat on the desk three rows in front of the one on my right.

He was chatting with a female friend, which meant he hadn’t gone home yet.

It was a good opportunity.

"That’s strange? Chihuahua-chan can play the guitar?"

The one who spoke out was the leader of a group of girls -- Akano Mei. <ref>The girl's name is 赤野メイ in kanji.</ref>

She was said to have a large circle of friends. No matter in which class, boy or girl, she had friends, practically as if she were the embodiment of the popular girl<ref>Riajuu (successful in social life) is used</ref>.

She and Chiwa should have only been on speaking terms, so the fact she was called by her nickname was a really worthy change.

"Hi, Mei-chan! Yes, I can play the guitar, ahahahha."

"How long have you played?"

"H-how long, um… I’ve been holding guitar picks since before I drank from milk bottles!"

"Are you part of a band?"

"M-me… I play on my own! Occasionally, I make solo performances in front of the train station!"

"Amazing, you’re like a street musician?"

"Y-yeah! Aha! Ahahaha!"

Hey......

Don’t be so boastful like that, alright?

Yet nonetheless, this conversation seemed to be useful. I saw the younger brother of Sakagami glancing from time to time at Chiwa.

We faced Masuzu to the side and noticed that under the table, she had put up an index finger.

That was the signal to continue.

"What kind of music do you normally listen to?”

One of Akano’s friends -- Aoba Satsuki added the topic. <ref>青葉さつき in kanji.</ref>

The two girls were the social core of our class, commonly known as the "Red-Green combo”<ref>The Ao from Aoba is from "green" (or blue) and the Aka from Akano is from "red"</ref>.

"Uh-uh, like reddo hotto, chiri Pepper. There’s also ba- baddo canpany and such, right?<ref>Chiwa correctly memorized the "names", but her pronunciation of them was strange (proven by using mostly hiragana instead of katakana). If you notice she only got the Pepper part quasi-right</ref>"

Although she stumbled about slowly, Chiwa still answered with the proper name of the Stands.

Evidently, she completely read all of Part IV last night.

"RED HOT.... What’s that?"

"You don’t know it? They’re a very famous American band."

Akano blinked with awe towards Aoba, willing to lend an explanation.

It seemed that Aoba was an "I know it" type.

"Harusaki-san, do you like RECHILI?"

Assorted puffer-fish hot pot? I’ve eaten it when I traveled with my family in Kyushu, but I much prefer pork shabu-shabu."

Hey, idiot Chiwa!

You should just think about the context! RECHILI is an abbreviation of RED HOT CHILI PEPPER!

"Ahhh, sorry, Harusaki-san doesn’t like this abbreviation, right?"

"Huh?"

“Old fans all abbreviate RHCP or CHILI PEPPERS, my father said so. "

Chiwa looked as if she finally understood.

"Ahhh! Uh, I was an old fan of theirs! I am an OLD TYPE!"

It seems that Chiwa won't be able to use Funnels. <ref>Funnels is a type of remote / mind controlled weapon of Gundam, the characters that can use these are labeled as "NEW TYPES". Eita's pun strikes twice, first that Chiwa calls herself Old type (and thus, isn't a new type) and second is that in katakana the "Fun" of "Funnels" is the same as "Fan", thus he implies that she isn't a good fan</ref>

"Well, since you’re a fan of the CHILI PEPPERS, your guitar should also be a STRAT, right?"

"Huh?"

"Frusciante is really handsome! It’s too bad he left the band."

“Fr-fruscian? Then whose Stand is that?”

“Stand?"

This conversation isn’t working.

Although I would have very much liked to help her, I have almost no knowledge of Western music. Even I just learned that RED HOT CHILI PEPPER"S" was their correct name moments ago.

Faced with this kind of situation, I gave a sidelong glance towards Masuzu.

"Ahhhh... the clouds are red like blood, the gods of twilightRagnarok are near."

Masuzu leaned on the desk with her hand supporting her cheek, as if she became a poet who lazily gazed out of the window.

It was as if everything had nothing to do with her.

I've never seen such a hideous person!

"Let me see your guitar."

Akano said this decisive sentence.

"N-no! This is my soul! I can’t just let other people casually look at it!"

Chiwa protectively shifted her (empty) guitar case behind her.

"Huh? Why not, just let me look at your precious STRAT."

"You should play a little for us then! Even a little bit would be great!"

This was the limit.

"Come on Chiwa! It’s about time for you to go to your live concert, right?"

I wanted to help her, but --

"Yeah, I want to see it too!"

At this point, Sakagami’s brother chimed in.

"My brother's hobby is collecting old guitars. His room is full of guitars. Maybe Harusaki would be able to get along with him."

Exactly like his brother, he has a handsome face. He approached Chiwa.

Finally backed into a corner, Chiwa trembled all over and clung to the guitar case.

I profoundly noticed how short her body was.

Carrying a large guitar case made her little body seem especially short; after all, Chihuahua was her nickname for a reason.

Yet her physique was clearly very strong.

Female high school students generally can’t even compare with her. After eight years of Kendo experience, the results were not just skin deep.

With this, Chiwa stammered:

“O-o-ooooo-o-k-okay? I-I-IIiiiii-I’ll let you see... "

She grabbed the neck of the guitar case, and raised it up as if it were a Shinai.

"DORAA!"

Chiwa issued a roar from the depths of her stomach:

"DORARARARARARARARARARARA!" <ref>This is Josuke Higashikata (led of Jojo's Part 4) multi-punch battle cry</ref>

She was like a crazy destructive guitarist at a live performance, and soon after began waving the guitar case!

"DORARARARARARARARARARARA!"

Sakagami’s little brother was dumbfounded, and stared blankly.

Everyone in the class held their breath, or was petrified while staring at Chiwa’s disheveled hair and destructive actions. Luckily, her arms were very short, so she didn’t cause any damage to anything around her.

"Uuuf-- DORA-!"

Finally, she gave one last epic-finishing cry, reminiscent of her glorious days in the Kendo Club.

The classroom was absolutely silent.

"Ro- rokkun ro-ru-! Sankyu!<ref>again, wrong pronunciation</ref> I love you!"

Chiwa’s face was stiff with a grin as she waved vigorously to the audience.

That was the end of the live performance.

"..................I’m done!"

Chiwa again grabbed her guitar case, and fled like a rabbit from the classroom.

No one tried to run after her.

We all remained motionless.

And didn’t even speak a word.

In this frozen classroom, only one person let out a sound.

Natsukawa Masuzu.

She had buried her face on the desk, her body shaking with vibration.

I was under the impression that she was devastated by the tragic failure, since she was the sponsor of this project. It's what I was expecti--

"Pufufufu, fufufufufu, ufufufufufu, fufufufufufufufufufu--"<ref>a very characteristic type of laugh, interpret it as mischievous for this case</ref>

She was laughing.

Crying.

Her shoulders quivered.

Her entire body burst out laughing.

...

Certainly, I really have never seen such a hideous person!

----------

===Notes===
<references/>

<noinclude>
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| Back to [[Ore_no_Kanojo_to_Osananajimi_ga_Shuraba_Sugiru:Volume 1 Chapter 4|Chapter 4]]
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| Forward to [[Ore_no_Kanojo_to_Osananajimi_ga_Shuraba_Sugiru:Volume 1 Chapter 6|Chapter 6]]
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</noinclude>

<noinclude>
 
----

OreShura: Volume 1 Chapter 5

2013-08-30T18:47:17Z

Kyon.Rewrite:

===Chapter 5 - Light Music is Mayhem===

[[File:Oreshura_v01_125.png|thumb]]

The next day, during lunch break time:

While eating lunch, I narrated in great detail what happened yesterday. Kaoru stared with wide eyes:

"Oh, that’s really an unexpected development."

Kaoru was right.

The fact that I got a girlfriend was a ridiculously abnormal event.

Yet I did not think that in a million years that I, famous for always going home after school, would be attending club activities…

"Do you know who is the advisor? If there isn't one, it isn't possible to do any club activities, right?"

“She’s the Classical lesson's teacher Itotani-sensei. Last year she was the instructor of the tea ceremony club, but after the third-years graduated, the club was shut down. We heard she wasn’t very busy, and it worked out that our club could take over the tea ceremony club. " <ref>The advisor's name is 糸谷 in Kanji.</ref>

"Then how did you explain to the teacher the club activities?"

"For the purpose of re-discovering the true appearance of the Japanese maiden, to transform Hanenoyama high school students into dignified, pure, upright, and beautiful girls, learning etiquette or maybe courtesy, etc..."

I listened to Masuzu explain this to the teacher, but I was completely bewildered.

Well, forget it. It was just a spectacle of words.

"Our club activities will have the purpose of making us popular and pleasing everyone, fuhuhuhu~"tehe☆ Now that certainly wasn’t a proper thing to say.

Besides, there was also a more important unresolved priority: whether my notebook would be leaked to Chiwa.

I later asked Masuzu why she had to bring in all this nonsense--

"No special reason. This is just more interesting."

"This diary is full of very interesting subjects... I can clearly sense Eita’s extraordinary talentAura."

"But worry do not, I will not disclose the contents of the diary to Harusaki-san, nor will I let her know that this is in fact your personal diary."

"I promise you, in case this should ever happen, I will lift you from your role of 'boyfriend'Fake."

Well, since she said so, there’s no harm in believing that for now.

But it was impossible to get rid of the lingering unease.

"Having said that, Natsukawa-san’s initiative is really amazing yeah."

"Yeah, I was actually surprised."

In fact, in merely one day spent she found an advisor, applied and settled a club, furthermore she dragged Chiwa into the group. I didn’t expect such power from an ojou-sama.

Incidentally, Masuzu was still not yet in the classroom, and I hadn’t heard that she would go to the student cafeteria... so where was she eating lunch?

"Oh right, what about Chihuahua-chan<ref>Kaoru's nickname for Chiwa</ref>?"

"It looks as if she is truly burning with fighting spirit......"

Even though it seemed like we hadn’t spoken in ages, Chiwa came over last night for dinner.

The dish was Ginger Roast pork, and she continuously refilled her rice bowl three times.

"Even though it's really irritating to be lectured by that woman, I also got to hear something good."

"I want to steal the secret, to be more popular than Natsukawa.... I will absolutely show you!"

Chiwa splattered rice while talking excitedly, looking very happy.

Probably, it's that.

Ever since she was unable to practice Kendo, I think she had too much energy waiting to be spent.

Moreover, she often said she was "looking for new things to get into".

Hehe.

"Somehow, doesn't Eita look extremely pleased right now?"

"Don’t say stupid things. You forced me to reduce study time and I find it very troubling."

However, the expression on my face answered differently.

In fact, Kaoru was completely right. I am a little bit... happy.

Yet it's not because I was taking part in a new club.

Rather, watching Chiwa repeatedly try her hardest -- it doesn’t feel bad.

"Having said that, being sandwiched in between two girls is very hard, too." Kaoru said with a wry smile.

"Yeah, only you can understand me."

"Of course, because we’re best friends."

This kind of empathetic feeling is something I also want to reach with my "girlfriend" and "childhood friend".

I eagerly look forward to it!

<center>♦</center>

After school --

There was a hanging scroll written in calligraphy by Masuzu hanging in front of the clubroom door.

Our Jien Otsu club<ref>自演乙 or Self-Recreation Club</ref> is finally ready to start activities.

"Harusaki-san, are you ready?" Masuzu asked.

Masuzu was wearing snowy white clothes as a cloak, which she mysteriously obtained from who knows where, with one hand holding my notebook, looking as if she were a teacher. The style of dress was utterly well suited to her. As expected, beauties can do things like that.

"Young maidens’ self-recreation, let’s start!"

Chiwa muttered with discontent, but nevertheless knelt onto a seat cushion. Like a true experienced kendo practitioner, her back was diligently straight, and her posture was excellent.

I followed and sat cross-legged on a folding chair, not far from the two girls.

"To start, let’s agree on a goal."

"Goal?"

"First, we target the person you want as your boyfriend. To put it simply, "who do you to make fall<ref>オトス , as in, taking down a target</ref>?""

"Becoming popular without that... isn't possible?"

"I believe setting a goal will make it easier to obtain results from the training."

"......But even if you want me to suddenly pick someone..."

She said, then Chiwa briefly glanced towards me.

What is it?

Is she going to ask for my advice about it?

"That’s right, it’s a rather good thing to have a goal. Well, do have anyone you are troubled over?"

"Ah… How could I have… uh?"

Chiwa bowed her head.

Ehhhhh…

She didn’t like any boy in particular, yet she still wanted to be popular?

This totally exhausts the point of having a goal.

"Don’t think too hard, it’s alright to start with those you think of as friends."

Chiwa bent her head down for a while and said,

"Well..."

She then looked up and continued,

"......Sakata from Men's Basketball? He’s a senior. I always hear the girls in our class discussing how handsome he is."

Sakata?

Does the men's basketball club have a senpai with that name?

"Do you mean Sakagami-senpai? The Third-year."

"Ah, r-right, that’s him."

So it turned out to be that senior?

If it’s really him, even I know his background. He’s going to participate in the High School Interhigh Sports Competition, and he’s the ace of Hanenoyama High School’s basketball team. He is very tall, good-looking, and is definitely considered "THE popular” male senior.

"But he is practically an unattainable flower, is that a problem?"

"Yeah, I definitely...... don’t recommend him." Masuzu said, vaguely.

I was a bit surprised.

I thought she would say, “ambitious goals are very good”.

"...No wait, actually this is very convenient."

She went on, as if putting aside her earlier hesitation. She wildly nodded and said, "Sakagami’s younger brother is in our class. It might be easier to use him to introduce yourself."

"Maybe you can even get him to tell his brother that there is "a very cute girl" in his class.

Even after all the trouble of finally picking a target, Chiwa’s expression still looked particularly unhappy.

"......Well, I guess I can settle for the Sakashita-senpai as a goal."

"You mean Sakagami, right?"

"Ah, right, it’s Sakagami-senpai."

How did her enthusiasm suddenly disappear?

Just yesterday, she was so vigorously spirited.

"Well, since we’ve agreed on a goal— we’ll begin the first day of the lecture."

Masuzu stood in front of a whiteboard (which she got from who knows where), and said:

"First we’ll read aloud "his" diary, so please pay attention and listen."

Huh?

I couldn’t help but be taken aback ... yet Masuzu’s eyes glanced at me with a smile, and told me "don't you worry".

...Well, I’ll believe you for now.

'''May 28 - Clear'''

"I want to introduce my partners – my guitar and Western music, as well as the rhythm of the soul."

Today, I carried my partners out with me.

They are me. Regardless of the time, I can’t let go, pass them away, or substitute them with false avatars.

It is the GUITAR! It is engraved as my soul partner.

When I carry the guitar, I look precisely like an artist.

The eyes of people passing on the street look at me differently.

That’s because they see an artist's eyes - looking forward in the line of sight.

Exposed to this ardent gaze, my partner and I become burning fire, hot, hot.

But my expression has always been KOOL.

Because -- no it’s not like that?

KOOL face × HAT soul = ∞ <ref>Kool (Cool) & Hat (Hot) are there, meant as typos</ref>

If it’s not like that, you can’t make real music --

Come on, today we’re opening the prelude of a live performance!

Let the dispirited school -- heat up now!

"Ku- oooooooooooouuuu-" <ref>yes, this is Eita's death scream</ref>

This is ...

T-this is sooooo ...

Masuzu really did follow our agreement, as she had made subtle changes, deleting specific terms, so one couldn’t tell that I wrote the diary.

She did this very well, and I wanted to praise her.

B-but...

But…

Aaaaaaaaaggghhhhhhhhhhh…

"Hey, Hey, Ei-kun! Are you okay?"

I found Chiwa shaking my shoulder.

"Yeah I’m fine, Chiwa, haha, what’s wrong? You look so surprised."

"Because you suddenly started banging your head on the wall! Eh! You… you’re bleeding!"

Chiwa quickly took out a red disinfectant fluid and a gauze from her bag. It seems she had developed a habit of carrying first-aid since participating in the Kendo Club. She was very practiced and skilled with treating my injury.

“Would Ei-kun like to go to the school infirmary? "

Masuzu was also surprisingly caring.

-- Oh wait, wasn’t she the one guilty for this?!

Damn.....

I never imagined that reading the notebook in front of others would have such great destructive power.

It really exceeded my expectations.

Maybe it really will affect my life.

I have to hurry and make Chiwa popular, and then stop the club activities, otherwise...

"S-sorry, I’m fine! We can keep going."

Masuzu nodded, and stood again in front of the whiteboard.

"The point of this diary entry is – ‘people who are in a band, are popular’! In particular: the guitar. In fact, ninety-seven percent of high school boys who start to learn the guitar do so to become “popular”. The investigation data is very clear; in other words, the guitar has a very good effect on popularity. Of course, this also applies to high school girls."

Although Masuzu calmly sneaked in some false rumors, I have to agree that her claims might have some truth even though she inverted the reasoning.

People who play in bands are really popular. But is this because "bands make people popular" or just because "popular people play in bands?" Which of these, I am not quite sure.

"But what if I can’t play the guitar?"

"Then what can you play?"

Chiwa tilted her head to the side and said:

"Ehhh.................................... the Shinai<ref>the bamboo sword used in Kendo</ref>?"

"The Shinai is not a musical instrument."

"Eh? But they make a sound when you hit with them."

"What kind of pitch is that?"

"Face hit ♪ Face hit ♪ <ref>In Kendo, you have to yell the body part you are attacking, here she is referencing here mask (men) gets hit</ref>"

"How you can say that so casually?!"

Masuzu tapped her baton on the whiteboard and said:

"It's alright even if you can’t play."

"Eh?"

"You just have to look as if you know how to play. You’ll have no chance to perform during school anyways. "

"That’s right..."

"For a while, the "air guitar" was really fashionable<ref>Air Guitar is where one pretends to play a guitar. Google it, there are even championships for it</ref>, right? That’s the best evidence that if you want to be popular, you don’t actually need to make music."

Masuzu pulled out a guitar case from behind the whiteboard.

It was a huge, hard, black-colored case.

"Here, this is for you."

Chiwa took the box, flipped it around and rolled her eyes:

"There’s no guitar in here?"

Masuzu shrugged, as if to mean, "What is this child saying?" with her body language. She asked, "If we put it in, wouldn’t it be too heavy?"

"......"

"Please carry this case with you. As a guitar player would say, a guitar is the equivalent of one’s own body, right, Eita-kun?"

"S- Sure."

In the notebook, it was written like that.

Though in reality, I know nothing about the guitar.

My diary entry was entirely based on the idea, "If I could play the guitar". You could say it was a type of psychological preparation or vision for the future... or well… maybe a kind of ideal dream narrative.

Ugh.

No...

"Waaahhhhhhhhh! If you jump from that window, you’ll be killed!"

"What is wrong with you?! Calm down, Ei-kun!"

I finally gave up on the idea of suicide with Chiwa’s attempts to calm me.

Masuzu cleared her throat and said,

"If anyone wants to touch this case, just angrily rebuke them, "Do not defile my soul!" or "Let go of your dirty hands!" Characteristic irritability is a distinctive trait of a guitarist."

That was a seriously prejudiced stereotype.

"But the inside is empty, right?"

"Well, if you put a guitar in, won’t it be too heavy?"

"......"

Chiwa wore an indescribable expression on her face, while staring at the case.

"Also, you have to completely belittle traditional Japanese music."

"W-why is that?"

"This is the predisposition of the guitarist. Listening to traditional music is scum, trash, dirty bugs! You need to have this kind of mental preparation, especially while listening to Johnny or AK. <ref>These are jpop artists. Johnny is probably Johnny Kitagawa & AK Akemi Krivit</ref> The moment you hear this kind of music, let your ears rot, acknowledge that."

Huh?

Does Masuzu really have an irreconcilable hatred of traditional Japanese music?

"Will this really make me popular?"

Chiwa said, wrinkling her eyebrows.

It seemed like she finally began to feel suspicious.

"Of course, "his" notes are more perfect than the Bible."

Even faced with doubtful questions, Masuzu was unwavering.

"Hatred of traditional music and love of Western music is an unconditional requirement for a guitarist."

"I’ve never listened to Western music, and I don’t know any singers."

"Not singers. They’re called "artists"<ref>Chiwa was using the japanese term for singer [ 歌手 ] , Masuzu corrects her with the English one</ref>."

Masuzu carefully corrected the details.

"Don’t worry, if someone asks which artists you like, just pick a name from the Stands of Jojo’s Bizarre Adventures Part IV, as famously recorded in the notebook."

"......"

Please forgive me, Araki Hirohiko-Sensei<ref>creator of Jojo</ref>.

"Oh..., by the way, what's "JoJo"?"

"Ehh?!"

Masuzu stared at Chiwa with a stunned expression:

"You’re saying you do not know of JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure?"

"Nope. Does it have something to do with a Yakiniku Shop?"

"............"

Masuzu sighed deeply.

Does this mean that, despite her appearance, she loves shounen manga just like how Chiwa likes shoujo manga?

"I finally know the reason why you are unpopular, Harusaki Chiwa. Someone who doesn't know Jojo is at the same level of the Peking Man<ref>a fossil, believed to be among the first evolutionary stages of the human man</ref>."

"Do- don't say stupid stuff! I’m fully-fledged Japanese!"

No, you should be throwing a tsukkomi to the "primitive man" part <ref>A little detail, by "Peking Man" Chiwa didn't understood that she was being called primitive, she merely understood that she was being called "someone from Peking"</ref>.

"If you wish to claim things that you’re a Japanese person living in the modern era, please finish reading JoJo first. Popular or not, this is where it starts."

"JoJo turned out to be such an important factor......"

Chiwa dejectedly hung her head.

But only for a few seconds.

"I know, I’ll stop by the bookstore to buy them on the way home!"

Her hair abruptly flicked up as she lifted her head, her pupils flaring up again with excitement.

"Originally, I wanted you to read it all from the beginning of the first part, but since we are actually concerned with the fourth part, get volumes twenty-nine to forty-seven. A single set is four hundred ten yen, so altogether that’s a total of 7790 yen."

"That’s so expensive! I only get five thousand yen in allowance every month!"

"Please understand the point. In order to be popular, one surely will need money."

"Really, this so-called love... it depends on how much money......"

Chiwa's eyes had a faraway look.

Yare yare<ref>A type of sigh, also regularly used by Jojo main characters</ref>…

"Don’t worry, Chiwa, if it's JoJo I have all volumes, I'll lend them to you."

"T-thank you, Ei-kun~!"

Chiwa looked exactly like a puppy that had been fed a treat, and excitedly moved closer to me.

"If you really liked what you read, be sure to get your own copy afterwards, okay?"

Masuzu urged her to do so. It was evident that she was a hard-core fan of JoJo.

After that, we talked about the details of the popularity-operation to be carried out the next day.

<center>♦</center>

The next day after school --

"Hey, hey -- Ei-kun."

While holding the guitar case, Chiwa came to our classroom.

"Hey -- isn't it Chiwa? Why did you bring a guitar with you today?"

"This is, of course, my soul! The guitar is my soul."

Chiwa and I were reciting our lines word-by-word.

As for Masuzu, she sat next to me, completely indifferent to us while writing the day-duty log. If there were any problems, if anything wrong happens, she'll add herself and follow through the situation.

Sakagami-senpai’s little brother sat on the desk three rows in front of the one on my right.

He was chatting with a female friend, which meant he hadn’t gone home yet.

It was a good opportunity.

"That’s strange? Chihuahua-chan can play the guitar?"

The one who spoke out was the leader of a group of girls -- Akano Mei. <ref>The girl's name is 赤野メイ in kanji.</ref>

She was said to have a large circle of friends. No matter in which class, boy or girl, she had friends, practically as if she were the embodiment of the popular girl<ref>Riajuu (successful in social life) is used</ref>.

She and Chiwa should have only been on speaking terms, so the fact she was called by her nickname was a really worthy change.

"Hi, Mei-chan! Yes, I can play the guitar, ahahahha."

"How long have you played?"

"H-how long, um… I’ve been holding guitar picks since before I drank from milk bottles!"

"Are you part of a band?"

"M-me… I play on my own! Occasionally, I make solo performances in front of the train station!"

"Amazing, you’re like a street musician?"

"Y-yeah! Aha! Ahahaha!"

Hey......

Don’t be so boastful like that, alright?

Yet nonetheless, this conversation seemed to be useful. I saw the younger brother of Sakagami glancing from time to time at Chiwa.

We faced Masuzu to the side and noticed that under the table, she had put up an index finger.

That was the signal to continue.

"What kind of music do you normally listen to?”

One of Akano’s friends -- Aoba Satsuki added the topic. <ref>青葉さつき in kanji.</ref>

The two girls were the social core of our class, commonly known as the "Red-Green combo”<ref>The Ao from Aoba is from "green" (or blue) and the Aka from Akano is from "red"</ref>.

"Uh-uh, like reddo hotto, chiri Pepper. There’s also ba- baddo canpany and such, right?<ref>Chiwa correctly memorized the "names", but her pronunciation of them was strange (proven by using mostly hiragana instead of katakana). If you notice she only got the Pepper part quasi-right</ref>"

Although she stumbled about slowly, Chiwa still answered with the proper name of the Stands.

Evidently, she completely read all of Part IV last night.

"RED HOT.... What’s that?"

"You don’t know it? They’re a very famous American band."

Akano blinked with awe towards Aoba, willing to lend an explanation.

It seemed that Aoba was an "I know it" type.

"Harusaki-san, do you like RECHILI?"

Assorted puffer-fish hot pot? I’ve eaten it when I traveled with my family in Kyushu, but I much prefer pork shabu-shabu."

Hey, idiot Chiwa!

You should just think about the context! RECHILI is an abbreviation of RED HOT CHILI PEPPER!

"Ahhh, sorry, Harusaki-san doesn’t like this abbreviation, right?"

"Huh?"

“Old fans all abbreviate RHCP or CHILI PEPPERS, my father said so. "

Chiwa looked as if she finally understood.

"Ahhh! Uh, I was an old fan of theirs! I am an OLD TYPE!"

It seems that Chiwa won't be able to use Funnels. <ref>Funnels is a type of remote / mind controlled weapon of Gundam, the characters that can use these are labeled as "NEW TYPES". Eita's pun strikes twice, first that Chiwa calls herself Old type (and thus, isn't a new type) and second is that in katakana the "Fun" of "Funnels" is the same as "Fan", thus he implies that she isn't a good fan</ref>

"Well, since you’re a fan of the CHILI PEPPERS, your guitar should also be a STRAT, right?"

"Huh?"

"Frusciante is really handsome! It’s too bad he left the band."

“Fr-fruscian? Then whose Stand is that?”

“Stand?"

This conversation isn’t working.

Although I would have very much liked to help her, I have almost no knowledge of Western music. Even I just learned that RED HOT CHILI PEPPER"S" was their correct name moments ago.

Faced with this kind of situation, I gave a sidelong glance towards Masuzu.

"Ahhhh... the clouds are red like blood, the gods of twilightRagnarok are near."

Masuzu leaned on the desk with her hand supporting her cheek, as if she became a poet who lazily gazed out of the window.

It was as if everything had nothing to do with her.

I've never seen such a hideous person!

"Let me see your guitar."

Akano said this decisive sentence.

"N-no! This is my soul! I can’t just let other people casually look at it!"

Chiwa protectively shifted her (empty) guitar case behind her.

"Huh? Why not, just let me look at your precious STRAT."

"You should play a little for us then! Even a little bit would be great!"

This was the limit.

"Come on Chiwa! It’s about time for you to go to your live concert, right?"

I wanted to help her, but --

"Yeah, I want to see it too!"

At this point, Sakagami’s brother chimed in.

"My brother's hobby is collecting old guitars. His room is full of guitars. Maybe Harusaki would be able to get along with him."

Exactly like his brother, he has a handsome face. He approached Chiwa.

Finally backed into a corner, Chiwa trembled all over and clung to the guitar case.

I profoundly noticed how short her body was.

Carrying a large guitar case made her little body seem especially short; after all, Chihuahua was her nickname for a reason.

Yet her physique was clearly very strong.

Female high school students generally can’t even compare with her. After eight years of Kendo experience, the results were not just skin deep.

With this, Chiwa stammered:

“O-o-ooooo-o-k-okay? I-I-IIiiiii-I’ll let you see... "

She grabbed the neck of the guitar case, and raised it up as if it were a Shinai.

"DORAA!"

Chiwa issued a roar from the depths of her stomach:

"DORARARARARARARARARARARA!" <ref>This is Josuke Higashikata (led of Jojo's Part 4) multi-punch battle cry</ref>

She was like a crazy destructive guitarist at a live performance, and soon after began waving the guitar case!

"DORARARARARARARARARARARA!"

Sakagami’s little brother was dumbfounded, and stared blankly.

Everyone in the class held their breath, or was petrified while staring at Chiwa’s disheveled hair and destructive actions. Luckily, her arms were very short, so she didn’t cause any damage to anything around her.

"Uuuf-- DORA-!"

Finally, she gave one last epic-finishing cry, reminiscent of her glorious days in the Kendo Club.

The classroom was absolutely silent.

"Ro- rokkun ro-ru-! Sankyu!<ref>again, wrong pronunciation</ref> I love you!"

Chiwa’s face was stiff with a grin as she waved vigorously to the audience.

That was the end of the live performance.

"..................I’m done!"

Chiwa again grabbed her guitar case, and fled like a rabbit from the classroom.

No one tried to run after her.

We all remained motionless.

And didn’t even speak a word.

In this frozen classroom, only one person let out a sound.

Natsukawa Masuzu.

She had buried her face on the desk, her body shaking with vibration.

I was under the impression that she was devastated by the tragic failure, since she was the sponsor of this project. It's what I was expecti--

"Pufufufu, fufufufufu, ufufufufufu, fufufufufufufufufufu--"<ref>a very characteristic type of laugh, interpret it as mischievous for this case</ref>

She was laughing.

Crying.

Her shoulders quivered.

Her entire body burst out laughing.

...

Certainly, I really have never seen such a hideous person!

----------

===Notes===
<references/>

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