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7 Nights:Chapter 01 part5

2009-08-16T14:47:19Z

OceanBlue: /* Chapter 1 - The woman warrior dances in the night - Part 5 */

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===<noinclude>Chapter 1 - The woman warrior dances in the night - </noinclude>Part 5===



".... eh?"

By the time I noticed, I was in a park.

"A ... again?"

I was totally taken by surprise. No doubt about this place. The same children's park from last night. I'm even wearing the school uniform. Taking my mobile from my side pocket and checking, it says 2:14. Date's Tuesday, June 26, one day in advance.

I should be in my T-shirt and short pants and retiring in my own bedroom. Is this the same dream from last night?

I don't think I'm in a dream, my five senses tell me. Just to be sure, I pinched my own face.

"Ow. This mean this is no dream ..."

If I'm not dreaming, then I'm sleepwalking. I'm worried if that's the case.

Well then, what to do next? I wanted to wake up if this was a dream, but I didn't know how. Even yesterday, I unexpectedly awakened-. Will somebody hit me for me to wake up? ... not a chance. Then, how about lying down and close my eyes? ... riight, I'm totally awake.

"What a pain, might as well explore this dream."

As I was puzzled about what landed me here last night, I hadn't payed much attention to the surroundings. Tonight's the second time, so I was more composed.

"How nostalgic ..."

I scanned the entire garden. This reminds me, this is the place where I first met Mi-ko. When my childhood friend carried the still-kitten Mi-ko in his arms, my face read "cute! cute! cute!".

I haven't met my childhood friend (Akane Shun) for nine months. I used to play with him during elementary school days, but since my relocation to Nanaobi, I only met him in school, and rarely since I got into high school (Shun's in 3rd year middle school at Suijou); well, so much for an association. Shun ... I wonder if he's fine.

<center>◆　◆　◆</center>

Leaving the park, I scanned the same road I went through last night. There really is no one standing in this town, even in the convenience store.

"... phew, tastes good."

After drinking some cola from the convenience store, I continued my exploration. With the cola's sweetness, coldness, and acidic strength, I again began to doubt with thoughts of, "Is this really a dream?".

I got also some beef jerky, a flash light, and a parasol for self-defense. Even with no one manning the counter, I placed the exact amount there. Once, my thoughts varied between, "It's a dream, swiping stuff's fine," and, "It's a dream, my money won't come down." In that place, I want to keep my morals in check.

Incidentally, I can say that this town is 'almost uninhabited', but it doesn't mean that it's 'totally uninhabited'. At least I'm here. That Akeno girl from last night too was here last night. It's totally plausible that someone other that me would be here tonight.

And that's the problem. Right now, there is that feeling on my back, just who is that person?

".........................."

I stopped and listened intently. In this quiet space, and without my own footsteps, surely I'll be able to perceive the person approaching me. A step, then another ... probably the sounds of regular footsteps. Somewhere, these footsteps sounded strained. This one's approaching steadily.

I definitely say my encounter with someone other than me in this ghost town will be anything but welcome. A hidden killer would be terrifying. If it's that girl again ... what next?

Anyhow, I've decided on facing him. I know a thing or two about going through narrow alleys. Shun and I, in our elementary days, used to go through them as shortcuts on the way to school. I'll hide myself there in the darkness, and I'll be able to observe him as he passes through. If I'm found and attacked, I'll ambush him head on.

"... good."

I turn back, entering the alley where no one will find me...

"---- gah-!"



Suddenly stars burst before my eyes! A slow shock spreads from my head throughout my body, and staggering, I completely fall backwards.

"Gu .... tsu ...!!!"

I groan from the head-splitting pain. This pattern, it's the same as last night...!?

Resisting the urge to vomit, I tried to focus on my shaky field of vision and caught sight of a stretched, slender leg from my loafers.

That girl was looking down on me.

"You ... the hell are you!"

Brandishing a bat, she spoke between short, wild breaths. With those words, I was expecting her to question me, but looks like she won't. From her eyes glaring at me, she totally lost her sense of reason.

The girl seems unaware who I am. I was able to see her face clearly thanks to the moonlight, but I don't think she can see me clearly. Moreover she's showing clear hostility towards me.

" ... to, ma ..."

Shit, I could not speak clearly. Will I get the bat again? That would be a good way to escape from my dream. If not, I would only end up crumpling down. A shitty way to die.

On the other hand, I think it's difficult to avoid that bat with my woozy body. If that's the case, then flying towards her would be fine. I might take in a bit of pain. So...

"--Haaaaaaaaah!"

And before the girl could scream and swing her bat, I kicked. It connected smack in her face for a stun!

"Kya--?!"

For a strike, it sure is overkill. The girl quickly and disappointingly went down, and I continued with my attack.

"L... let me go!"

She struggled with me on top of her, striking me with her fists.

"Tch... !"

The feeling of nausea and fatigue recurred again.

"C... calm down!"

I feel awkward with my rough treatment of her, but I'm taking no chances. I grabbed her wrists and slammed them into the ground, stopping all resistance.

"H... help! Somebody!"

Even now, the girl's voice changed to what sounded like she's crying. Damn, this girl's sneaky. Even if I'm the victim and I'm doing it for self-defense, I feel like I'm the attacker here. From the sidelines, it seemed like I'd be caught red-handed for rape.

On the other hand, to stop her rampage, I can't just step aside. How will able to calm her down? "Nobody's coming even if you scream, so shut it-!" would only reinforce the suspicion of rape. In such cases, I must quickly put an end to this. Ah, got it-!

"Akeno!!"

I called her name quickly and sharply.

It had an immediate effect, and the girl replied "Ha...". The screaming stopped. In that instant, I wove my words slowly and precisely.

"Kasugamori Akeno. Suijou Academy, middle school 3-C. Lacross women's team member. ... I presume?"

"H... how did you know me?"

The girl shivered weakly for a change. Am I her acquaintance or her stalker. I bet she could only decide between them two.

"I heard it from your senior. Her name's Kure Nazumu. I'm her classmate."

So it would put everything in order.

"Kure's... classmate... ?"

"That's right, Suijou academy, high school 1-E. Hoshi Sakuya. That's me."

"Hoshi... "

From her murmurs, she's probably searching her memories for my name. But I'm not sure she met me before; I haven't introduced myself.

It's impossible to do a one-sided introduction. Since the girl calmed down, I slowly released my grip on her wrists and stood up releasing her.

"Sorry for my rude introduction. As for what happened... are you hurt?"

I held out my hand to the rising girl.

"Th ... thank you."

The girl hesitated, but grabbed my hand. Standing up, she brushed the dust off from her entire body.

"Hm... I'm fine. I'm so sorry for hitting you so suddenly. Are you all right? ... no, you can't be all right. I struck your head with all my strength with my bat..."

"Ah, it's only a scratch."

Impossible, it hurts like hell. But I endured it, smiling like a gentleman. The girl looked at me for the first time with a modest expression.

"............... ?"

Her gaze unexpectedly sharpened. She then stared at me hard.

"You... where did..."

She finally recognized me. Now, how should I answer her? "Sorry, but we've met before" would only give a bad impression, even to me. Hmmm, if that's the case, I must speak words that would definitely convince her. In other words --

"Last night, I met you in a dream, didn't I?"



“------ !?”

I repeated the same words to the girl I met that morning. Her expression changed as she gazed at me...

“You’re the pervert that morning! And you’ve been stalking me since yesterday!”

I have been humiliated with those words. With my reputation on the line, I have to deny this right now.
“What happened that morning is totally an accident. Moreover, I'm not a stalker. I don’t know what the heck you misunderstood me for but ---”

“Misunderstanding!? Let me tell you my side! You have been stalking me since yesterday, this morning, and even tonight. If that isn't stalking, I don't know what stalking is. Let me tell you something, if you don't get it. For all I know, it is plainly stalking --- admit your crime! Reflect on that if you understood it. Don’t show yourself in front of me again! Do it and I’ll have you expelled from school. I’ll even report to the cops!”

“……………”

With the girl deciding everything, I can only stay silent. Well, if we only consider her situation, her reasoning could be valid. Had she been more considerate, this might not have happened. If that is the case, I should state my case more clearly!

“That’s a total and overly self-conscious misunderstanding! You may think that way, but I have no interest in you. Popular or not, to me you are a 'dangerous girl'! You've hit me with your bat without restraint, just what the hell’s going on in your head! You have made quite an injury! And it’s attempted murder!”

I spoke as severe words went through my head. I'm getting angry.

Her expression paled, as her mouth could only open or close. Well, she’d still be cute if she could maintain her demeanor but... far from dejection, she kept on glaring me.

“This is a legitimate self-defense! I’m only watching myself for some pervert following me. There no way a pervert would complain like that!”

“Enough with your accusations! I have not shadowed you even once! Or should I say you’re the one shadowing me…!”

“Did not! Why would I!? There’s no reason why I would be shadowing you!”

“Quit playing dumb! I’ve always noticing something on my back –”

-- back? That’s strange, and I paused. The one following behind me, there’s no way he would be waiting in front of me.

“Wh… what’s that…”

As I quickly shut my mouth, the girl half-stepped back, confused.

Oh damn it. It’s possible that I inevitably got knocked down for no good reason; damn I totally missed that in the first place. With someone following me, I went through the alleyway to find out just who was stalking me. If that “someone” is not this girl…? If we were quarreling that loud, someone else might notice where were quarreling by now; we didn't notice it if it was approaching closer, on the other hand.

“… … … …”

With that, I slowly and silently turn around. There –

A dragon is approaching.



I thought I misjudged at the onset. However, looking at silhouette from the block wall looking into the alley, it’s obviously not human and more like an abnormal giant reptilian head. The skin, reflecting the moonlight, is covered with numerous scales, and a goggling eyeball is looking pointedly at me. It’s nose is merely two meters from me.

My mind blanked for a moment. Am I looking at a vision? Am I going mad? No, I’m only dreaming. Only a fantastic creature would only confirm that I am in a dream.

<nowiki>*dragon growling*</nowiki>

Dragons are revered, whether in games, manga, or movies. Sometimes they led the heroes, sometimes they fought alongside heroes, sometimes they stand in the heroes’ way. I think it would take many boyhood experiences in exchange for being in a hero’s position.

Then what was the relationship when it met us? In this case it’s neither “guide”, nor “ally”, nor “enemy”. I cannot see any sense of intelligence looking at its inorganic eyes. The eyes are the only organs useful for locking on moving objects. Our relationship is more primitive, that is: 'hunter and hunted'.

“Wh… what’s this thing?”

I was suddenly snapped to my senses by a girl’s voice. My white field of vision became clear. The next instant ---

“---- !!!”

The dragon opened its large mouth, its head thrusting into the alley! I instinctively jumped back, grabbing the girl’s shoulders and diving for the ground! Taking the full brunt of the girl’s weight, we tumbled along the asphalt.

“Ouch, ouch…!”

I can say it’s awfully painful, but it’s nothing compared to being eaten by the dragon. I was certain the dragon’s fangs went for my ankles. Any slower, and I’d be caught by my ankles. From a hopeless position I’d be dragged along and swallowed whole.

<nowiki>*dragon growling*</nowiki>

Furious that it didn’t catch me, the dragon roared. My skin and eardrums vibrated like from an electric shock. Thank god for the narrow alley. With the mammoth lizard caught in the fence, it couldn't reach us by a few centimeters.

“Ne! What is the meaning of this!? Is this really real…!?”

“There’s no way this is real. This is must be the dream’s creation.”

“But it looks real…”

“Ah… at this moment, you could say it’s the 'real thing' in this dream”

“Which way!?”

“I don’t care! Anywhere would be fine. Anyway ---“

<nowiki>*dragon growling*</nowiki>

The dragon further pushed itself in. Cracks are running on the concrete walls at both sides. Shit…!? “RUN FOR IT!”

Determined, I turn my eyes away from the terror. Turning my back to the dragon, I grabbed the hand of the confused girl and ran.

<nowiki>*crash*</nowiki> --- I hear the sound of crumbling rubble behind me. The fence must have been quickly demolished. Nevertheless were still in a small alley. There’s no way a behemoth can go in ---

“It’s coming --- !”

As I reply to the girl’s screams, the approaching dragon’s body leapt into my vision as it destroyed the fence!

“Shit! Shit! Hurry!”

“You don’t have to say hurry!”

Our stamina’s different, out steps are different. The dragon’s quickly approaching!

Tap-tap, the dragon’s footsteps are lighter than I thought. Its movement’s quicker than what I typically imagined for dragons. As we listen to the approaching scream, we ran without hesitation, without looking side to side.

Just ahead of the alley lies a private house’s fence. We’re going to jump into the streets, …

“Head right!”

I stopped in a pinch. With the power forced onto me by the girl, her legs turned to the right without stopping.

“Hyaaa --- !”

However, the girl tumbled forward and ran from the alleyway. Immediately after that …

<nowiki>*slam*</nowiki>

An attack came from my flank, and I felt a floating sensation! My vision blurred and flowed from left to right. And then another crash! I hear a sickening sound from within my body. If I could feel it myself, I was tumbling onto the ground.

<nowiki>*coughing*</nowiki>

Feeling something warm blocking my throat, I coughed. Large amounts of zinc tasting like liquid began to overflow from my mouth. The rich smell numbed my nose. It can’t be…blood?

“Sakuya --- !!!”

A voice calling my name. That girl --- is Akeno calling my name?



I got it. I’m in no case lying down. I’m perfectly awake. So run on ahead of me… I thought, but I couldn'tt say it. A whistle-like sound escaped from my mouth.

Shit! I can't hear why my body’s saying. This is way different from the time Akeno hit me. Not even close. Somehow, I could only move my eyeballs.

“………………”

Soon I saw the dragon beside me.

Within the swirling dust, stepping on some fallen block fragments, the elephant-sized lizard looked down on me. Indeed, I might be charged on and blown off.

<nowiki>*growling*</nowiki>

With the dragon’s growl, its opened mouth suddenly covered my vision! I instinctively put out my right arm to protect my head.
And then that arm’s bitten.

“Ga .. ah?”

The sharp fangs plunged onto my arms! And then my body was dragged along, and lifted into midair…!! With gravity pulling me down, the monster’s fangs won’t let me go. The sinews in my arms are tearing apart. Blood dripped from where the sinews were torn apart onto the ground below.

“Stop it…! Stop it! Let go of him!”

Akeno’s bitter screams called my fading consciousness back. She still standing there! You idiot, run. Run away!

I’m not worried about myself. This is a dream. If I get myself killed in a dream I don’t really die… I want to think that way. Or should I say, let me wake from this dream! Or grant me superhuman powers. If all else fails… somebody help me!

“… ya! Stay tight, Sakuya!”

“…………………………………..”

<nowiki>*crash*</nowiki> goes my body as it fell down. I think I was let go, this is the moment I’ve been expecting for.

<nowiki>*dragon growling again*</nowiki>

Going through a nerve-wracking pain in my right arm, my body again felt light. The dragon’s once downward pointing mouth is now pointing up.

Ah, I got it. This is the way crocodiles throw their prey into their mouths. I then fall, being sucked into the opening void. The warm night swallowing me ---?

<nowiki>*dragon screaming in pain*</nowiki>

I thought my eardrums were split open by the loud sound. My vision, that should be gone by now, is somehow perceiving the moon (a bit bigger than a half-moon) above.

My body was hit severely, by this scraggly flat … asphalt? Did the monster disgorge me?



It must be either good or bad luck that it ended without me dying. I must have fallen from two meters, my body still in one piece. My ribs are dislocated to my left shoulder, my right shin … I know here and there my bones are broken. The blood in my throat, I can’t help but vomit it out.

My head was alive with a thumping sound. The ground before me is still swaying. Damn dragon, releasing me almost dead, just what the hell is it doing?

“Sakuya! Are you all right!?”

I thought if I heard a voice beside me, it must be Akeno peering at me.

“…. I’m alive…”

I answered, because I don’t even have the courage to bluff I’m all right. Along with my words, my blood vomited out.

“…!? Hang on! What to do? What can I do…”

“… the dragon… is it…”

Since Akeno rushed to me, does that mean the dragon’s threat is receding? Even if I can immediately hear its roar…?

“It’s all right… look.”
[[image:7 Nights 002.jpg|thumb]]

I can’t trust Akeno’s reply. For my uneasy, doubtful eyes, I turned to the direction of the sound. Only my eyes moved, locking on what the girl is following.

There, I saw a battle maiden.

The battle maiden, garbed in a feather-plumed helmet and fantastic-looking armor, danced in the night.

In both of her hands was a golden lance. Its spear tip was like a loop enclosing a cross, glistening in the moonlight just like those divine halos in Christianity. Flashing in the moonlight, it easily went through the monster’s hard scale, leaving a straight red line in the behemoth’s body.

<nowiki>*dragon screaming in pain*</nowiki>

Even with the dragon’s rage, its awful fangs could not reach the woman. She easily flowed from left to right, making fun of the dragon, and the dragon could not land a hit. And then ---

“----- !”

With a short scream, the battle maiden unleashed her weapon to the sky. The lance, streaking through the night sky like a meteor, pierced right into the monster’s forehead!

<nowiki>*dragon again screaming in pain*</nowiki>

The dragon reared up, its forelegs raised high up. It let out another scream into the night sky.

But it's on its last legs. Its power suddenly gone from its large body, it was pulled down by gravity, and it went down to the ground with a loud crash. There it remained still.

With her back on the dragon’s spine, the battle maiden landed softly on the earth.

With her elegant dress,

with her long hair fluttering about in the wind,

with her clear eyes sparkling in the moonlight,

--- with her hot figure, I ---

held my breath,

my eyes blurred,

the pain in my tormented body forgotten,

--- as I could do nothing but watch her in awe.

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| Back to [[7 Nights:Chapter 01 part4|Chapter 1 Part 4]]
| Return to [[7 Nights|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[7 Nights:Chapter 02 part1|Chapter 2 Part 1]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

7 Nights:Chapter 01 part4

2009-08-16T13:33:47Z

OceanBlue: Present tense in the beginning, past tense in the end? Changed to past for consistency.

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===<noinclude>Chapter 1 - The woman warrior dances in the night - </noinclude>Part 4===



Classes end at 6 in the evening. Even though it's past summer solstice, the sun's still high and it's too bright to call it "evening". And it's hot.

I walked on my way home, my body smelly and drenched in sweat from club activities. My typical, singly detached house is on the corner of a residential district 15 minutes by foot from school. While it is comparable with the old traditional houses of Shiraishi-cho, there are numerous new houses in Nanaobi. Our house, like most houses, was built by my father in 3 years with funds from a 30-year loan. 

"I'm home--"

The smell of curry greeted me as I entered the entrance hall. 

"I'm home. Is it curry for dinner?"

As I entered the living room, Mom's voice from the kitchen greeted me again.

"Welcome home. You're just in time. Please help me with dinner preparations. Ah, wash your hands before that. Take out the laundry, too."

"''Ha-i.''"

I took my sports bag to the bathroom. Opening it, I took out my dirty tennis gear. As I threw them into the washing machine, the words "Ah-, table tennis ..."

Right now, I'm a rookie tennis player, but I was an active table tennis player in middle school. I had intended to continue playing table tennis in high school also, but the table tennis club was dissolved before I could enter high school, so I moved to the tennis club. I enjoy tennis as a game, but there are times I miss the ping-pong ball. That's it for my side story.

"''Mya-''"

As I did my laundry, something purred at my feet. Mi-ko, a Siamese tabby, approached my shins.

"I'm home, Mi-ko. Have you been a good cat?"

Crouching, I held her just like holding a woman on both sides. As I kissed the cat just like kissing a maiden, Mi-ko too licked my lips with her rough tongue. What a cute cat.

Carrying Mi-ko, I returned to the living room.

"''Hai'', here Mi-chan!"

Mom placed a small dish with some cat food on the floor beside the table. Despite Mom's sweet call, Mi-chan pretended not to hear it. She refused to let go from my leg.

"''Uuu'', when will she grow accustomed to me, I wonder ..."

I could only smile bitterly at her childish words.

"It's too early to be depressed. It hasn't been that long." 

Today's the fourth day since Mi-ko came to live in our house. She was originally raised in my childhood friend's house, but circumstances forced them to relinquish her; my Mom took the cat in. I'm the only one in the house whose acquainted with the cat, and so she's attached only to me.

"Only the first night's a cheat, I wonder." 

"But it's great that I got along with her well. Just keep at it, and don't lose patience."

"I'll do that."

Mom laughed, as she returned to the kitchen. Just to make sure, I nudged the dish closer to Mi-ko.

Suddenly, a familiar tune sounded from the left-on television. A new movie was being introduced from the variety show. "Cosmo Wars Episode 3", the sixth from the world-famous science-fiction epic, will probably open to the public in the middle of the next month. A laser blade toy from said series even lies in my closet.

"Sakuya-, Can you clean up the tableware for me?"

"Ah, right, I'm on it."

Going around and avoiding a still-eating Mi-ko, I went to the kitchen.

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| Back to [[7 Nights:Chapter 01 part3|Chapter 1 Part 3]]
| Return to [[7 Nights|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[7 Nights:Chapter 01 part5|Chapter 1 Part 5]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

User talk:OceanBlue

2009-08-16T13:15:57Z

OceanBlue: Removing all content from page

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume1 The Fifth Question

2009-04-08T01:48:22Z

OceanBlue: Correcting a previous edit.

=== Fifth Question ===

'''In the following sentence, fill in ( ) with the correct answer.'''

Light is a wave and a ( ) as well.

'''Himeji Mizuki's Answer:'''

[particle]

'''Teacher's Comment:'''

Good answer.

'''Kouta Tsuchiya's Answer:'''

[an object which will bounce away all things that get close to it.]

'''Teacher's Comment:'''

Your answer always surprises me!

[[Image:BTS vol 01 101.jpg|thumb]]
'''Akihisa Yoshii's Answer:'''

[A hero's weapon]

'''Teacher's Comment: '''

I like to play RPGs as well.

''“Class Leader of Class D Hiraga Genji Died in Battle!”''

“Oooo---”

The speakers announced this information throughout the school amid the victorious shouts from Class F and the cries from Class D.

“Amazing! I can’t believe we actually won against Class D!”

“Now we can say goodbye to the tatamis and the Japanese-style tables!”

“Ah, now that rotten stuff will belong to Class D!”

“Long live Sakamoto Yuuji!”

“I love Himeji!”

People were praising Class Leader Yuuji from every direction.

I looked at the direction where Yuuji was standing before and saw him surrounded by the Class F students and standing among the crestfallen Class D students.

“Ah, it’s nothing! After being praised by you guys like this, what should I say?”

Yuuji scratched his cheek and turned his face away. Surprisingly, he was pretty shy.

“Sakamoto! I want to shake your hand!”

“Me too!”

Everyone was treating him like a hero. By the looks of this situation, you could understand how much we disliked that classroom. The tatamis in the classroom were really rotten, so it was normal for us to dislike that classroom.

OK, I should blend into the crowd and find the chance to get close to Yuuji.

“Yuuji!”

“Oh, isn’t it Akihisa?”

Yuuji turned his head back.

I went close to him with a refreshing smile on my face.

“I want to shake hands with Yuuji as well!”

And then held my hand out.

“Oooo!”

(crushing sound)

“Yuuji...... I just want to shake your hand, so why are you holding my wrist like this?”

“Shut up.... Of course I have to restrain your hand like this.... Hmph!”

“Wa!”

My hand was turned in the wrong direction.

I couldn't stand the pain, so I shouted out like an impaled pig and accidentally dropped the knife I had been holding in the other hand.

“......”

“......”

“Yuuji, it is good to win this war with everyone.”

“......”

“I never knew that completing jobs with fellow classmates can give you such a good feeling. I am so touched that even my wrist joint is feeling the pain!”

“What were you planning to do just now?”

“I just want to use this hand, which is so painful it feels like it could break anytime, to shake your hand and share the joy of victory!”

“Oi, someone go and get a pincer plier!”

“W... Wait! I am sorry!”

“Hmph.”

He finally let go of me. It was extraordinarily painful!

Come to think of it, what was he going to do with the pincer plier?

“*mumbling*”

It seems Yuuji was mumbling about something. What was he talking about?

“nails...”

I will never fight him anymore.

“I had never imagined that Himeji actually belonged to Class F.... Unbelievable.”

Someone’s voice was coming from my back.

I turned my head to see who was talking and saw Hiraga, who could hardly walk properly, slowly coming toward us.

“Ah, I... I am sorry for what happened just now.”

Himeji also ran towards us from the opposite direction.

“No, you don’t have to apologize. This is just the result we get for not fighting Class F seriously.”

The world of competition was very harsh. They lost because they were being cheated, but there was nothing that Himeji needed to apologize for.

“I will hand over the classroom according to the rules. However, it is very late now, so can we do it tomorrow?”

This was so sad for the general who lost the battle! In the next three months time, they wouldn't be able to declare a Test Summoning War, so he would have to suffer the hatred from his fellow classmates in that lousy room. The class leader would be the hero if the class won in the war, but if they lost he or she would be the sinner.

“Of course there is no problem with doing it tomorrow. Right? Yuuji?”

Looking at his current state, I really couldn’t bear to ask him to hand over the classroom now, so I turned and asked for Yuuji’s opinion.

“No, there is no need for that.”

I couldn't believe the answer coming from Yuuji's mouth.

“Huh? Why?”

“Because I never planned to get Class D's classroom.”

Yuuji told us his plan as if it were there from the beginning, but I had no idea about that at all.

“Yuuji, what’s wrong? It took us so much effort to get these normal facilities, right?”

“Haven't you forgotten something? Our final goal is to defeat Class A!”

Defeating Class A, this was Yuuji's and my final goal.

“If that’s the case, why isn't Class A our target? Isn’t this very strange?”

If we were going to fight them head-on sooner or later, then why didn't we just attack Class A directly, instead of wasting energy doing things here and there.

“Go measure your own capability! This is why you got the nickname ‘Brother Idiot’ from the secondary school students nearby.”

“What are you talking about? Stop saying lies which are half true!”

“Ah, I am sorry. It should be the primary school students nearby, right?”

“...... That’s not the wrong part.”

“What...... Do you really have such a strange nickname?”

D... Don’t look at me! Stop looking at me with those looks on your faces!

“Anyway, I don’t plan to get any of your Class D facilities.”

“Of course, this is the best outcome for us...... but are you sure?”

“Of course, but I have one condition.”

That’s right. If we had let them go so easily, then this war would have been meaningless.

“Let’s listen to it first!”

“Don’t worry, it's nothing special. When I give you the signal, I want you to break that thing by the window. That’s all.”

Yuuji’s finger was pointing at the external section of the air conditioner outside the window.

However, that machine didn’t belong to Class D. Class D's facilities were just normal things you could find in a slightly poorer high school, which didn’t include anything like an air conditioner. It was there because there was no space in the owner's class, so they placed it outside Class D’s classroom.

“Class B’s external section for their air conditioner?”

“Of course, breaking it might cause you to be scolded by the teacher, but this trade should sound good enough for you, right?”

If they ‘accidentally’ broke it, they would just, at most, get serious warnings from a teacher. However, if doing so could help them avoid staying in the broken room for three months, there was no better deal than this.

“This definitely sounds good to us. But why do you want to do this?”

Hiraga’s question was very reasonable. If our aim was Class A, why are we doing unrelated things like targeting Class B and breaking their air conditioner?

“That’s related to our tactics against Class B.”

“Is it? Then I shall gratefully take your offer.”

“I will talk to you again the day after tomorrow, at about this exact time. You can go back now.”

“OK, thanks. Hope you can defeat Class A according to plan.”

“Haha, stop saying things you don't mean. You're actually thinking that we'll definitely lose, right?”

“That’s right. Class F can never win against Class A. That’s just wishful thinking.”

Class D class leader Hiraga raised his hand and then left the scene.

“Everyone! Thanks for the hard work today! Tomorrow, we will be recovering the scores we've used, so everyone should head back and have a good rest! That’s all for today!

After Yuuji gave out the commands, everyone chatted with each other and walked back to the classroom to pack their stuff before leaving.

“Yuuji, should we go as well?”

“Yeah!”

The feeling of winning was really great, but to tell the truth, I was really tired. Tomorrow, we will continue the war, so I should just head back and rest!

“Ah, w... wait, Sakamoto.”

“Huh?”

When Yuuji was preparing to leave with everyone else, someone stopped him. That person was Himeji.

“Oh, Himeji, it’s you!”

“Actually, I have something to ask Sakamoto.”

She pressed her hand against her chest, looking a bit excited. It must be something important; maybe I should avoid them and leave?

“Oh, I know.”

After saying that, Yuuji walked toward Himeji and chatted in front of me. I hardly heard what they were talking about, and somehow, I felt a bit lonely.

Himeji just stared at Yuuji like she was really concentrating and totally forgetting my existence; it had to be something important.

Huh? Could it be...... Himeji actually didn’t realize my existence? Could she have never noticed me at all? Damn! If that's the case, I'll just pull up her skirt until I'm satisfied!

''“This is a good chance, Akihisa. Let’s just pull the skirt! Isn’t about time to see the underwear of such a pretty girl?”'' [http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume1_Translator%27s_Notes#Question_5]

What! Are you the devil in my heart? Damn! Are you here to tempt me to the path of a delinquent? Don’t look down on me! My sense of justice will not lose!

Eh? Where is the angel? Where is the angel in my heart? Wait, come out now! Isn’t this showing that I only have an evil heart?

“Anyway, I was a little bit interested in the beginning, but because that guy came and talked to me about it, I became more interested in it.”

While I was fighting with my own mind, the two of them were walking toward me.

“Eh, why would Yoshii say something like that?”

Both of them didn’t know about the fight I had in my heart and continued to chat.

“Come to think of it, he did mention about what happened during the class division test. Maybe it's related to that, which means even idiots have things they won't give up.”

Yuuji was talking in a very friendly way, adding some jokes in between the conversation. Looking at him, what was he talking about? Could it be a love confession? Himeji liked Yuuji?

“Class division test, that’s right.”

“I can only say this much, but Himeji, I think your guess is correct.”

I see, no wonder Yuuji looked so proud. Being loved by such a cute girl, there was no reason why he wouldn’t feel happy.

By the way, why hasn’t the angel in my heart come out?

“Oi, Akihisa. We should go back now.”

“Ah, OK. Have you finished chatting with Himeji?”

“Yep, now her resolve is stronger. Right, Himeji?”

After being asked by Yuuji, Himeji's face immediately turned red, and I could even imagine a “Boom” sound effect above her head. This skill was really stunning.

“Oh, is it? I'm not sure what's going on, but let's go. Bye, Himeji.”

“Ah, yes! See you tomorrow!”

Himeji’s face was still red. She kept waving her hand and saw Yuuji and me leave the classroom.

''“Nothing’s wrong with pulling up her skirt, right?”''

The angel in my heart, you were too slow! And even you agreed with pulling up her skirt?

<center>☆</center>

“Right.”

“Huh?”

“Was it really necessary to fight Class D? There are many other ways to break the air conditioner, right?”

“Ah, you’re talking about that?”

We were on the way home, and because our houses were in the same direction, we usually went home together.

“There are many other reasons, like making everyone get used to the Test Summoning War, to give pressure to other classes, to improve self confidence, to increase our morale, and so on.”

“I see. Then why don’t we take the Class D facilities?”

“That’s because our final target is Class A. If we take the facilities from Class D, some of the students could be satisfied and start to go against the Test Summoning War. To avoid something like that from happening and to maintain the energy everyone has due to dissatisfaction, I purposely made that decision.”

Surprisingly, this guy thought a lot. After listening to Yuuji, I couldn’t imagine him as a person with bad results. Or I should say... I saw the ‘Genius’ again.

“Can we win against Class A?”

“Of course, leave it to me.”

“Thanks, for the trouble I caused because of me being stubborn.” [Editor Note: What are this and the next sentence supposed to mean?]

“Not really. The reason why I come to this school is to do something big in the Test Summoning War.”

Yuuji unintentionally looked into the distance.

When Yuuji was a kid, he was called ‘Genius’. However, his past glory had faded. Yuuji never said anything about it, but he’s most likely where he is now because of his lack of motivation to study.

The test scores would become the power of the syokanju in the Test Summoning War. Although Class F’s results were obviously bad, if they used their intelligence and strength and strength in this war and won against Class A, it would prove that those who couldn’t study could also stand on top. I think that’s what Yuuji wanted to prove.

“To achieve our goal, you need to help me. Anyway, let’s concentrate on recovering the scores tomorrow.”

“Che.”

This meant we were going to have tests tomorrow. We used up a lot of scores today, so it looks like we are going to have tests on every subject tomorrow. Oh no, it would be tests for the whole day!

“Don’t just play games, read some books before you sleep!”

“Alright, alright. I will at least read the boo....eh?”

This is so strange, why is my bag so light? Maybe....

“Ah, my text books! I forgot about them under the Japanese-style table!”

“Idiot, hurry back and get it.”

“Aww..... Then you go back first.”

“Of course, why should I wait for you?”

“I just knew it, you are heartless.”

I was nearly home. Complaining wasn’t going to help, so let’s just get the book and go home!

I thought about that and ran to the school, which only had a few students participating in club activities left.

“Oh man.”

I sighed and put on my indoor shoes, then headed toward the Class F classroom.

“I’m back!”

Just as if I went back to my own home, I shouted once and walked into the classroom. Because of the Japanese-style table and tatami, this room looked more like home than a classroom.

“Y...Yoshii?”

“Eh? Himeji?”

Himeji was in the classroom, which I thought was empty.

“W... What’s wrong?”

She looked panicked. What’s wrong with her?

I looked towards Himeji’s seat (?), and saw cute letter paper and an envelope on the Japanese-style table.

“Ah, T... This is...”

What was she doing? Although I didn’t know what they were for, it looked just like she had prepared the paper and envelope and was ready to write a love letter for Yuuji.

''“Face the truth, it is a love letter.”''

Shut up, the devil in my heart! I won’t be deceived by your lies! Even if you say so, what proof do you have to show that this is a love letter?

“This is, ah....”

“OK, I understand, no problem.”

“Eh---- Wa!”

With a crashing sound, Himeji tripped on the Japanese-style table.

The letter she was hiding at her back flew in front of me, and I accidentally saw one of the sentences.

'''''“I like you.”'''''

''“Nothing can prove that this is a love letter more than this right?”''

[[Image:BTS vol 01 117.jpg|thumb]]
“......”

''“Understand? This is the truth.”''

“......”

''“Isn’t it time to give up?”''

I folded the letter that flew towards me, and returned it to Himeji.

To show that I was a caring person, I joked:

“This letter of unfortunate is really special!”

''“Are you prepared to neglect it until you die?”''

What are you talking about, you stupid devil! Every time you say something, it causes me misfortune! I won’t be cheated anymore!

“Er, I think you are mistaken......”

“You don’t have to do that, just come to me and tell me, I can do it directly. Ah don’t worry, I will go to borrow the stun gun from Yamashita next door. ”

“Yoshii, this is not letter of unfortunate!”

“No way! This is the letter of unfortunate! I am feeling very unfortunate now!”

“Yoshii.”

I swung my arms like a kid, and suddenly something soft grabbed my hand. When I looked properly, Himeji was holding my hand, tried to stop me from going berserk.

“Calm down, acting like this will harm yourself.”

Her voice was filled with warning.

When I calmed my darkened heart down, these hopeless facts were starting to corrupt my heart.

“...... There is nothing I can do....... I have to accept it.”

My knees felt powerless and I just knelt down. What’s going on? Why did I get this losing feeling in two days continuously?

The person who would receive the letter is Yuuji right? I am concerned about it.

“The person receiving it is our class---”

“Yes, he is our classmate.”

Himeji blushed, but she answered my question without hesitation.

Then it was obvious. That’s right, that person was Yuuji. However I didn’t want to name it and embarrass Himeji.

“Is it? What is good about that guy? Maybe his outlook is acceptable!”

“Ah, no, what attracts me is not the outlook. Ah, of course I like the outlook!”

“Damn! I hate that guy from the bottom of my heart.”

“Is...it?”

“Yeah, for me as a person with no confidence in outlook, that sounds too good.”

“Eh? Why? You look very handsome! My friend is interested in you!”

“Eh? Are you sure?”

Even I think that her friend is mad.

“Yeah. Although I am not too sure about the details, but when she saw you and Sakamoto walking together, she would say ‘Muscular looking Sakamoto and Beauty looking Yoshii walking together, look just like a piece of drawing’.”

“Your friend is a good person, you have to be good to her.”

“Other things she says are ‘Yoshii will be the uke[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume1_Translator%27s_Notes#Question_5]’ and so on.”

“I take back my words, stay away from her! That world is still too early for you Himeji.”

Yuuji and I.... *vomit*!

“Anyway, besides the outlook, isn’t his inner side good as well?”

“Ah, Err....Yes....”

“That’s right, his liver looks very strong and healthy!”

Should be able to sell it at a good price I think?

“That’s an organ inside the body.”

“That, although I think it is not possible, is the personality of that person good?”

“Of course, no problem!”

Waa.. I never imagined Himeji would speak so loudly. I was scared. I never knew she liked Yuuji so much.

“What’s good about his personality?”

“Very...very gentle....”

Gentle?

The person who cheated me to go and got hit in Class D, and nearly broke my arm was a gentle person?

“I'll give you the numbers now, have you prepared your pens and paper? Don’t worry, he is a very good Cranial nerve surgeon. ”

“My brain is perfectly fine!”

How could it be possible? What made you think that he was gentle? What kind of cruel family did you grow up in, Himeji?

“Gentle, bright and optimistic, he is my idol!”

Listening to her honest comment, it gave me a strong feeling that made me unable to laugh at her.

“About that letter..”

“Y...Yes.”

“Good luck.”

In a situation like this, I couldn’t do anything to destroy the relationship. Since Himeji liked Yuuji so much, as a fellow classmate, I couldn’t stop myself from cheering for her.

“Yes!”

The smiling Himeji was just too adorable; I really envied Yuuji from the bottom of my heart.

<center>☆</center>

The next day, I went to school as usual.

In order to replenish the scores we lost in the war, we had to undergo a whole day of tests, I needed to do my best now.

“Good morning---”

Along with the ‘kala--kala’ sound effect, I opened the classroom door.

It was still tatamis and Japanese tables in the classroom. I still felt a little bit pity for not getting class D facilities.

“Oh, Akihisa. You are nearly late! ”

“Ah. Good morning, Yuuji ”

Yuuji arrived earlier before me in the classroom, he sat down near the Japanese table beside mine, with the English textbook in his hand. It seemed he was still planning to do some last minute studying before the test.

“Nobody complain about anything?”

“Huh? Complain about what?”

“About Class D facilities.”

We all put so much effort and won the war, but eventually we didn’t take the enemy facility, it would be normal that some of us to feel unhappy about it.

“Ah, that! I have explained about it with everyone, so no problem at all.”

“Oh.”

I think it's because of Yuuji’s performance yesterday that makes people follow his order so well. Besides when they knew it is possible to win against higher level classes, they lost interest in the facilities of Class D!

“By the way, are you all right?”

“What?”

“About what happened yesterday.”

What, which event is he talking about...... Ah, is it about Yuuji’s execution?

“Ah, even idiot like me will give up doing idiot stuff like that after knowing my nails will be pulled off for doing that.”

“No, I am not talking about what you plan to do to harm me.”

Then what is it you want to talk about? I totally don’t know what Yuuji is trying to tell me.

“What are you trying to say----”

“Yoshii!”

“Wa!”

My speech was broken by a punch from nowhere.

“Sh...Shimada, good morning....”

“This is not the time to say good morning!”

Shimada looked like she was really angry.

I was lying on the ground now and able to see her underwear, but I was not feeling happy at all.

“You idiot, if you couldn’t save me yesterday, that’s fine. But how dare you use the fire extinguisher to break the window, and then blame it on me!”

Oh, now I remember.

“And thanks to you, my ranking on ‘'The Most Unwilling to be Her Boyfriend” is even higher now!”

That’s surprising; I thought you are at the top of that rank already.

“I was planning to tie you up for interrogating and torturing. ”

Suddenly, Shimada calmed down.

By the way, before you tied me up, hadn't you hit me enough already?

“I think you have enough punishment already, I shall forgive you this time!”

“Yeah, I can’t stop my nose from bleeding till now!”

“No, I didn’t mean that.”

“Huh? Then what do you mean?”

“The first test we have today is math.”

Shimada looked really happy--- happy from the bottom of her heart and said:

“And Funakoshi sensei is supervising the test.”

The moment I heard this sentence, I dashed out from the classroom and ran on the corridor.

<center>☆</center>

“Ha....This is tiring.”

I lied on the table and sighed.

Finally we finished the tests on four subjects. The tests by themselves were exhausting, suffering the questioning by Funakoshi sensei at the same time made me even more exhausted.

By the way, I introduced an otaku[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume1_Translator%27s_Notes#Question_5] living around my house (thirty nine years old/ single..... should be male) to Funakoshi sensei, and told her that’s all I wanted to tell her yesterday.

“Hmm, you look exhausted.”

Hideyoshi came from nowhere and said.

He had a pony-tailed hair style today. Owww...... this is exactly what I liked. He is a guy, but he was tempting me with that pose now.

“......(nodding his head like mad)”

Silent pervert, who was always quiet and you could hardly felt his presence, was beside Hideyoshi.

“Good, let’s have lunch now. I will have ramen, katsudon, fried rice with curry today. ”

Yuuji is still looking energetic and standing up, you can’t see any bit of tiredness on his face. What material is he made of? And he eats too much for his lunch.

“Hmm? Yoshii you guys are heading to cafeteria? Can I stick with you guys?”

“Ah, Shimada you want to come as well? No problem for me!”

“Then I shall go with you guys.”

“.....(nod)”

Silent pervert nodded and agreed, maybe he was planning something? Idiot, there was nothing good from a tomboy like Shimada.

“Yoshii, are you thinking something bad about me?”

“Definitely NO.”

Her sixth sense was scary.

Anyway, I finally got the chance to rest in the lunch break, I should eat something nice to recover my strength! However you couldn’t really get anything nice from the cafeteria.

“Then, I will be luxurious today, and have a salted water meal today.”

“Err, everyone...”

When we stood up and prepared to head towards cafeteria, someone’s voice stopped us.

“Hmm? Ah, Himeji is that you? Want to go to cafeteria together with us?”

“Ah, no. Err.... it’s about l...lunch. That, I promised everyone yesterday....”

Himeji looked at us uneasily, what’s wrong?

“OOH, could it be the lovely lunch?”

“Y,Yes, if it is OK for everyone.”

She took out the package from her back after she said that.

Really? Himeji, you are really a good girl! Thanks to you, I might be able to live a few days longer!

“Of course it is ok for everyone, right? Yuuji!”

“Yeah, that’s right. Thank you.”

“Is it? That’s great.”

Himeji shows a happy smile. This is so strange, she is the one who made the lunch, but she is happier than us who are eating it for free, I really don’t understand what gentle girls are thinking.

“Hmph...Mizuki you are pretty aggressive...”

Shimada stared at me fiercely as if I was the murderer who killed her dad.

I don’t understand fierce girls thinking either.

“Then, since we have someone making lunch, let’s eat at the rooftop instead of the classroom.”

“That’s right.”

For such a high class food, it is not acceptable to be eaten in a lousy room filled with rotten tatamis and smelly smell from guy’s sweat. We should go to an enjoyable location such as the rooftop, enjoy the food there and feel grateful to the chef.

“Is it? Then you guys can go there first.”

“Huh? Yuuji, where are you going?”

“I'll go to get some drinks, as a treat to you guys for the effort yesterday.”

“Ah, then I will go with you! You can’t take so many drinks at the same time right?”

It was very rare to see Shimada being so caring; did she take the wrong medicine?

“Thanks.”

“OK.”

Yuuji agreed without a doubt. If it was me, I was sure I would feel worried to be taken to somewhere and got beaten badly.
“Remember to keep a share for us.”

“Don't worry, but I can’t guarantee anything if you come too late.”

“I don’t think I will be late. Let’s go!”

Yuuji and Shimada took their wallets and left the classroom, looks like they were heading to the cooperative store on the first floor.

“We should get going as well.”

“Yeah.”

I took over the package from Himeji, and walked to the rooftop.

These lunch boxes are pretty heavy, it seems that she put a lot of effort into making lots of different dishes, I am so touched.

“Great, the weather is pretty good!”

“Yeah!”

We walked to the roof top and opened the door, and a clear sky without any clouds welcomed us. This was the best weather for eating lunch box.

“Ah, I have brought the cushion.”

Himeji took out the cushion for picnic out of the package. She seems to be well prepared, maybe she has brought the whole set of equipment for picnic?

We felt exited and started preparing together. There was no one else on the roof top, like we had booked the rooftop for ourselves, that’s great.

“This really feels good!”

“.....(nod)”

I lazily lied on the cushion, enjoying the sunlight and the breeze that was blowing towards me.

“Err, I am not very confident....”

Himeji opened the cover of the meal box that was only used during New Year time.

“OH!”

All of us cheered together. It looked so delicious. There were karaage, tempura, onigiri, bamboo shoot rolls and so on. Whatever dishes you could name, all appeared in the lunch box.

“Sorry Yuuji, I will start----”

“....(took a piece)”

“Ah, Silent Pervert you are too cunning!”

Then he smoothly put the food into his mouth---

“…..(fell onto the ground)”

(Sound of Silent Pervert falling to ground.)

Silent Pervert boldly fell down, and his muscles were slightly twitching.

“……”

“……”

Hideyoshi and I looked at each other.

“Wa! Tsuchiya?”

Himeji was panicked and dropped the disposable chopsticks that she prepared to give to us onto the ground.

“……(Suddenly stood up)”

Silent Pervert stood up.

“…….(Great!)”

Then he faced Himeji and raised his thumb.

He probably tried to say “delicious”!

“So, so that suits your taste? That’s good.”

Silent Pervert’s thinking must had been delivered to Himeji, because she looked so happy.

However, Silent Pervert, why did your legs keep on shaking? You looked just like a boxer who was going to get a KO.

“Don’t restrain yourself, eat as much as you can!”

Himeji showed her smile, and told us to eat more.

When she put it this way, it looked like we couldn’t refuse at all. I even had a feeling to eat all of them no matter how awful they were.

However, I still cannot forget silent pervert’s empty looking eye and shaking body.

(Hideyoshi, those dishes, what do you think?)

I used a low volume so that Himeji couldn’t hear, and whispered to Hideyoshi.

(…… No matter how I look at it, it is not faked.)

(That’s right, now we are in deep trouble.)

(Akihisa, is your body strong?)

(To tell the truth, my stomach is very weak. It has degenerated because I rarely eat anything.)

Of course, Hideyoshi and I were using the happiest looking face and talked to each other, we couldn’t allow Himeji to discover our conversation and the shock in our heart.

(Leave this to me!)

Hideyoshi bravely spoke in a low voice.

(Stop kidding, this is too dangerous!)

(No problem. Although I might not look like it, my stomach is very strong. Even sprouted potato can’t harm me.)

(But…)

(Don’t worry! Believe in my iron stomach---)

[[Image:BTS vol 01 133.jpg|thumb]]
He had the outlook of a pretty girl, but he was saying some manly lines. At this moment---

Yuuji appeared on the stage.

“Ah, Yuuji.”

Before we could stop him, he used his hand to take a piece of fried egg.

(Sounds of munching)

(Sounds of Yuuji falling to ground)

(Sounds of juice cans falling on ground)

The juice can fell onto the ground, and spilled everywhere.

“Sa..Sakamoto? Wait, what’s wrong?”

Shimada appeared before him and saw what happened. She immediately dashed towards Yuuji.

There is no mistake about it, Himeji is the real killer chef.

I looked at Yuuji, who was shaking crazily like Silent Pervert.

After that, Yuuji, who was on the floor, used his eyes to ask me:

(Did someone put poison in the food?)

(This is not poison, this is the true ability of Himeji.)

I also used the eye contact to answer his question. This was the secret technique that could only be used by us since we stuck together for a long time; it was very useful in situation like this.

“Ah, my leg… suddenly cramped.”

Yuuji told a kind lie because he was afraid to hurt Himeji’s feeling. Himeji, maybe it is just like what you said yesterday, Yuuji is a gentle guy!

“Ah haha, it must be because you are dashing up and down the stairs right?”

“Ah, maybe that’s the reason.”

“Really? I thought Sakamoto is pretty strong and healthy.”

Shimada, who is totally out of the situation, shows a doubtful face. It seems we should make her get off the stage before she speaks too much.

“By the way, Shimada, the place where your place your hand….”

“Huh? What’s wrong?”

“There is a bug just died there not long ago.”

This is total bullshit.

“What? You should say it earlier!”

She panicked and moved her hand away, this made her look a bit more like a girl.

“I am sorry. You better go to wash the hand.”

“You are right, I will be right back.”

Shimada left the scene. Now the danger was lowered by a little bit.

(We can’t let Shimada eat something like this, right?)

(Of course.)

HAHAHA--- the frank laugh of three guys was spread all over the roof top.

(Akihisa, it is your turn now!)

(D,Don’t be silly, I will definitely die!)

(What happened just now has lowered my determination….)

(Yuuji, eat it! Himeji definitely wants to see you eat it.)

(Is it? I thought this is for you, Akihisa.)

(No way! You don’t understand a girl’s thinking!)

(No, if you put it this way, you are the one here who doesn’t understand---)

(Shut up, stop struggling!)

“Huh? Himeji, what is that?”

“Huh? What?”

Himeji turned around and looked at the direction where my finger was pointing.

(Eat this!)

(Unnn?)

I took the chance and stuffed all the food into Yuuji’s mouth.

Yuuji’s eye had already turn white, I grabbed his lower jaw and helped him to swallow the food---- when you are eating, remember to munch carefully and swallow them slowly.

“Hu, finally finished it.”

“I didn’t know you were so good in torturing!”

Although I am being commented like this by Hideyoshi, I don’t care at all.

Yuuji was lying on the ground, and shaking even more crazily than just now, but I didn’t care as well.

“I am sorry, I think I look wrongly.”

“Ah, I see.”

I could never imagine Himeji to fall for such a classic trick, this is so helpful. But she is too pure; I am worrying for her now.

“The lunch box is very delicious, thanks for the food.”

“Yeah, your cooking skill is very good.”

Thanks to Yuuji, the lunch box was cleared without any problem. Our heart was just as clear as the sky now!

“Ah, that’s fast. Have you finished all of them?”

“Yeah. And Yuuji kept on saying ‘delicious, delicious’, and ate them at the same time.”

Yuuji, who was at the corner of our eyes, weakly shook his head.

Don’t worry, you have left a good impression with Himeji, maybe she will make the lunch for you again.

“Is it? I am so happy.”

“No no no, we are the ones who are happy. Right, Yuuji?”

I signalled Yuuji to show some reaction, since he was still conscious, there should be some reaction from him.

“Argh…argh….T,thanks, Himeji….”

This is so terrible; his eye is looking very empty.

“Talking about good food, there is a café in front of the station that just opened not too long ago.”

In a situation like this, the person who changed the topic was me. This was all for avoiding Himeji to say ‘Then I will bring the lunch for you guys tomorrow’.

“Ah, the comments about that shop are pretty good!”

“Huh? There is a shop there?”

“Yeah. To thank you for the lunch, Yuuji will give you a treat there.”

“You bastard, don’t simply make promises for other people.”

It seemed our tactics were successful. We have finally avoided the crisis.

We were just chatting about everything and enjoying this warm time together.

“Ah, that’s right.”

Himeji put her hands together.

“Huh? What’s up?”

“Actually---”

She put her hand into the bag and searched for something.

“I have prepared dessert as well.”

“Ahh! Himeji, look at that!”

(Akihisa! Even I will die if you do it again!)

Yuuji risked his life to stop my plan.

(Chi, you little bastard, your reaction is pretty quick huh.)

(Akihisa! Are you planning to kill me?)

(There is no other way! This mission can only be done by you, Yuuji! I will leave this to you!)

(Don’t be an idiot! I won’t do it even if you use that frank smile in the shonen manga[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume1_Translator%27s_Notes#Question_5] and ask me to do it.)

(You are hopeless.)

(If you say that, why don’t you do it yourself!)

(What! Why did pose like that? What are you trying to do to me?)

(I am going to punch your heart using my fist, and then stuff everything into your mouth after you faint! Take this!)

(No---- Crazy Killer!)

Yuuji held his fist firmly, just one second before the fight began, Hideyoshi quietly stood up.

(…..Let me do it!)

(Hideyoshi don’t be reckless, this is life threatening!)

(And you actually want to sacrifice me?)

Of course! Compared to you smelly guy, Hideyoshi who has a pretty girl outlook is so much more important.

(No problem. My stomach is very strong, eating these at most cause me Dyspepsia.)

That’s true, Hideyoshi’s stomach can nullify the poison, maybe he can resist these desserts.

“What’s wrong with you guys?”

“Ah, no! Nothing at all!”

“Ah, could it be……”

Himeji’s face suddenly darkens.

Did our thinking of not willing to eat these desserts be exposed?

“I am sorry, I left the spoons in the classroom!”

The dessert inside the container was fruits mixed with yogurt (looks like it anyway), so using chopsticks was really not suitable for eating them.

“I will go to get them now.”

Himeji disappeared at the stairs entrance. Now is the chance---

(Use this chance and eat them!)

Hideyoshi held the container in his hand, looked like a warrior who treated death as returning home.

“I am sorry, I will never forget your kindness.”

“Sorry, and thank you.”

Facing us who were bowing and quiet, Hideyoshi smiled, and spoke as nothing happen:

“Don’t make it like I am going to die, I didn’t plan to do so yet!”

“T..That’s right.”

“Ah! Hideyoshi, we are counting on you!”

“OK, leave this to me. I will start eating now!”

Hideyoshi raised his head, and drank the entire object inside the container.

“Munch munch. What, this is just normal----Wa!”

Life is like a flower of virtuality, and another flower has fallen in a blink of an eye.

“..Yuuji…”

“..What?”

“Sorry for forcing you to eat those foods just now.”

“……I am glad you understand that.”

The person, who self proclaimed himself ‘Iron Stomach’, was now lying on the floor with white foam at his mouth.

<center>☆</center>

“By the way Sakamoto, about the next target---”

“Huh? About the Test Summoning War?”

“Yeah.”

After the very happening lunch, everyone revived and casually enjoyed the tea, especially Hideyoshi. He was trying to drink as much green tea as he could, I heard that green tea could help to kill the bacteria!

By the way, Shimada only managed to buy green tea. Although she was very angry, we were very grateful.

“The opponent will be Class B right?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

This reminded me that Yuuji mentioned about destroying the Class B air conditioner machine outside Class D yesterday. What was that for?

Since Class B air conditioner had nothing to do with attacking Class A, would that mean we will be dealing with Class B next time?

“Why Class B? Isn’t our final target Class A?”

Class A was our target. Everyone must be wondering why were we challenging Class B, which was one grade lower than Class A right? By the way I didn’t understand why as well.

“I will be frank.”

Yuuji suddenly turned serious.

“No matter what tactics we use, we can never win against Class A with our fighting ability.”

Admitting we lost before fighting? This was not what Yuuji would do.

However this was not news for us. Fumitsuki Gakuen divided the classes from Class A to Class F, and Class A wasn’t just any ordinary class; you could say their abilities were in a totally different dimension from the others. For all the fifty people in Class A, forty of them were still beatable. They were just normal students whose results were a little bit better than Class B. The remaining ten students were totally different. Especially the Class Leader Kirishima Shouko, her ability was totally out of anyone’s imagination. Even if we managed to attack them by surprise, and surrounded her, we would end up getting beaten up badly.

No matter what tactic you used, if you could not defeat the Class Leader, you could never win the war. Since we couldn’t defeat her, we had no chance of winning at all.

“Then our final target will be changed to Class B?”

Although there was still some distance away from Class A, Class B equipment was pretty good as well, I believed no one would be unhappy about it.

“No, that’s not going to happen. Our final target will still be Class A.”

“Yuuji, this is totally different from what you have just said right?”

I continued the conversation after Shimada, being able to defeat Class A or not meant a lot to me.

“If we fight as a class we can never win, so I decided to challenge them to duel.”

“Duel? How should we do it?”

“Use Class B to achieve that.”

Use Class B? How?

“Do you know what happens when the lower level class loses in a Test Summoning War?”

“Eh? O..Of course!”

Actually, I didn’t know.

(Yoshii, if the lower level class loses in the war, their equipment will be one grade lower.)

Luckily Himeji reminded me from my side. I see, that’s what would happen!

“The equipment will be downgraded right?”

“That’s right. Which means, for Class B, the equipment will the downgraded to Class C equipment.”

“Of course, that’s common sense right?”

“What if the higher level class lose?”

“They will be sad.”

“Silent Pervert, go and bring me a pincer plier.”

“Wait! Are you trying to transform my body into one that will never need to use finger nail cutter?”

I didn’t say anything wrong, they would be sad right?

“They will need to exchange the equipment with the lower class.”

Himeji helped me answer this question again; she was such a good girl.

“Yeah, I am going to use this rule, and negotiate with them.”

“Negotiate?”

“If we win against Class B, I will ask them to attack Class A, so that they won’t have to exchange the equipments with us. Even if they lose to Class A, they will only get the equipment of Class C’s level, which is much better than the Class F equipment, this should work smoothly.”

“Hmph, then?”

“I will use this to negotiate with Class A, and warn them ’we will start attacking you after you have finished fighting with Class B’.”

“I see.”

It must be tiring for them to fight another war after they finished the fight with the second level class in the same year.

Although this was the same for Class F, we had our unhappiness which motivated us. We might not be as smart, but we were very motivated.

However it was very different for Class A. They wouldn’t get anything from winning the war, and they didn’t want to waste time with an opponent like Class F, the morale between Class A and us would be very different.

“However, there is a problem with this tactic. This might cost more energy, the process is troublesome, but compared to a duel, the Test Summoning War is much more secure war to win against Class A right? Also---”

“Also?”

“Are you sure we can win in the duel? They must already know that Himeji is in our class.”

After Class F won against Class D, everyone would definitely focus on the winner. Himeji was not our secret weapon now. Therefore, they must have prepared tactics to fight against Himeji.

“I am well aware of this and well prepared, don’t worry.”

Yuuji looked confident, which was totally different from me, who was really worrying now.

“Anyway we will need to fight against Class B first, I will fill everyone with the details later.”

“Is it? Well, it is fine by me as long as you have tactics about it.”

If there was no chance of winning, he wouldn’t be able to say something like that right?

“By the way, Akihisa.”

“Huh?”

“After the tests today, go declare war to Class B.”

“No way. You can go to do it yourself.”

No matter what you say, I won’t change my mind.

“Well, let’s decide who will do the job using paper scissor rock.”

“Paper scissor rock?”

Well, at least this is better than him forcing me to go.

“OK, I accept the challenge.”

“Good, then who ever lose will go, ok?”

Yuuji nodded and said:
“It will be boring if we just play normally, let’s include a psychological battle as well.”

This was Yuuji’s suggestion.

About the psychological battle, it is that, right? Everyone said what they would use, and then guessed whether the opponent would do as they said or lie. I see, this is interesting.

“I understand now, I am going to use rock.”

Yuuji made a pose for paper scissor rock, and told me:

“Are you? Then I am---”

Yuuji, what will you think? Am I going to be honest and use rock, or use others? This is a fight of intelligence as well.

“If you don’t use rock, I will kill you!”

Wait…. What kind of psychological battle is that?

“Ready? Paper, scissor, rock!”

“Waaa!”

Paper----(Yuuji), Rock---(Me)

“Then it is decided, you will go.”

“I will not go!”

I won’t accept this! This is so different from the psychological battle I imagined!

“Are you still worrying about being beaten up badly like in Class D last time?”

“That is one of the reasons!”

“If that’s the reason, you can rest assured, I can guarantee that it won’t happen again.”

Yuuji stared at my eyes.

I won’t be cheated! You keep using the same technique and asking me to do the dirty work!

“Because there are a lot of people in Class B who like handsome boy.”

“Really? Then there is nothing to worry about!”

Only I can complete this difficult mission, the responsibility is huge!

“However you are so ugly……”

Yuuji had a long sigh. Nonsense, that was not true!

“You are so impolite! I am a handsome boy when I look at myself from three hundred and sixty five degrees!”

“There is 5 degrees extra.”

“I think there is only 5 degree!”

“I hate you two.”

I only mixed up three hundred and sixty five days in a year and degrees of circle, so why are you using the magnifying glass to look at my small mistake! Damn!

“Anyway I will leave this to you!”

Yuuji’s voice came from my back, as the lunch time ended; the afternoon which was full of tests had just started.

<center>☆</center>

“I would like to listen to your explanation.”

The test in the afternoon had ended safely; it was now after school time.

I used my hand to cover the sleeve that had been pulled into pieces, and walked towards Yuuji slowly.

“This is just as I thought.”

“Wa--- I am going to kill you! I will cut you into pieces!”

“Cool down.”

“Urgh!”

A…attack at the heart….this is terrible.

“I will head back home now. Tomorrow morning we will have tests, don’t oversleep.”

After saying that in with a frank tone, Yuuji left the classroom. You are a Devil!

“Urgh….my stomach….”

My whole body was in serious pain, it looked like before the effect that Yuuji’s technique caused on my body disappeared, I couldn’t move at all.

I could only lie on the ground and watched every classmate leave the classroom. No one is worried about me, and bringing me to the nursing room. Am I so hateful? Although I think Himeji will worry about me and come to me.

Because I couldn’t move my body, I turned my neck and looked around in the classroom. I saw Himeji still remaining in the classroom, holding her back and looking around as well. She looked very suspicious, it seems like she was guarding something.

---Ah, now I remember, Himeji wrote a letter yesterday right? Maybe she was thinking where she should put her letter.

“Urgh…”

I felt shy about continuing watching her, so I slowly crawled out the classroom.

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| Back to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume1_The_Fourth_Question|The Fourth Question]]
| Return to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume1_The_Sixth_Question|The Sixth Question]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume1 The Fifth Question

2009-04-06T04:03:41Z

OceanBlue: Kinda freely edited based on what I thought the sentence meant, sometimes restructuring entire sentences. I stopped at "letter of unfortunate", since I have no idea what that is.

=== Fifth Question ===

'''In the following sentence, fill in ( ) with the correct answer.'''

Light is a wave and a ( ) as well.

'''Himeji Mizuki's Answer:'''

[particle]

'''Teacher's Comment:'''

Good answer.

'''Kouta Tsuchiya's Answer:'''

[an object which will bounce away all things that get close to it.]

'''Teacher's Comment:'''

Your answer always surprises me!

[[Image:BTS vol 01 101.jpg|thumb]]
'''Akihisa Yoshii's Answer:'''

[A hero's weapon]

'''Teacher's Comment: '''

I like to play RPGs as well.

''“Class Leader of Class D Hiraga Genji Died in Battle!”''

“Oooo---”

The speakers announced this information throughout the school amid the victorious shouts from Class F and the cries from Class D.

“Amazing! I can’t believe we actually won against Class D!”

“Now we can say goodbye to the tatamis and the Japanese-style tables!”

“Ah, now that rotten stuff will belong to Class D!”

“Long live Sakamoto Yuuji!”

“I love Himeji!”

People were praising Class Leader Yuuji from every direction.

I looked at the direction where Yuuji was standing before and saw him surrounded by the Class F students and standing among the crestfallen Class D students.

“Ah, it’s nothing! After being praised by you guys like this, what should I say?”

Yuuji scratched his cheek and turned his face away. Surprisingly, he was pretty shy.

“Sakamoto! I want to shake your hand!”

“Me too!”

Everyone was treating him like a hero. By the looks of this situation, you could understand how much we disliked that classroom. The tatamis in the classroom were really rotten, so it was normal for us to dislike that classroom.

OK, I should blend into the crowd and find the chance to get close to Yuuji.

“Yuuji!”

“Oh, isn’t it Akihisa?”

Yuuji turned his head back.

I went close to him with a refreshing smile on my face.

“I want to shake hands with Yuuji as well!”

And then held my hand out.

“Oooo!”

(crushing sound)

“Yuuji...... I just want to shake your hand, so why are you holding my wrist like this?”

“Shut up.... Of course I have to restrain your hand like this.... Hmph!”

“Wa!”

My hand was turned in the wrong direction.

I couldn't stand the pain, so I shouted out like an impaled pig and accidentally dropped the knife I had been holding in the other hand.

“......”

“......”

“Yuuji, it is good to win this war with everyone.”

“......”

“I never knew that completing jobs with fellow classmates can give you such a good feeling. I am so touched that even my wrist joint is feeling the pain!”

“What were you planning to do just now?”

“I just want to use this hand, which is so painful it feels like it could break anytime, to shake your hand and share the joy of victory!”

“Oi, someone go and get a pincer plier!”

“W... Wait! I am sorry!”

“Hmph.”

He finally let go of me. It was extraordinarily painful!

Come to think of it, what was he going to do with the pincer plier?

“*mumbling*”

It seems Yuuji was mumbling about something. What was he talking about?

“nails...”

I will never fight him anymore.

“I had never imagined that Himeji actually belonged to Class F.... Unbelievable.”

Someone’s voice was coming from my back.

I turned my head to see who was talking and saw Hiraga, who could hardly walk properly, slowly coming toward us.

“Ah, I... I am sorry for what happened just now.”

Himeji also ran towards us from the opposite direction.

“No, you don’t have to apologize. This is just the result we get for not fighting Class F seriously.”

The world of competition was very harsh. They lost because they were being cheated, but there was nothing that Himeji needed to apologize for.

“I will hand over the classroom according to the rules. However, it is very late now, so can we do it tomorrow?”

This was so sad for the general who lost the battle! In the next three months time, they wouldn't be able to declare a Test Summoning War, so he would have to suffer the hatred from his fellow classmates in that lousy room. The class leader would be the hero if the class won in the war, but if they lost he or she would be the sinner.

“Of course there is no problem with doing it tomorrow. Right? Yuuji?”

Looking at his current state, I really couldn’t bear to ask him to hand over the classroom now, so I turned and asked for Yuuji’s opinion.

“No, there is no need for that.”

I couldn't believe the answer coming from Yuuji's mouth.

“Huh? Why?”

“Because I never planned to get Class D's classroom.”

Yuuji told us his plan as if it were there from the beginning, but I had no idea about that at all.

“Yuuji, what’s wrong? It took us so much effort to get these normal facilities, right?”

“Haven't you forgotten something? Our final goal is to defeat Class A!”

Defeating Class A, this was Yuuji's and my final goal.

“If that’s the case, why isn't Class A our target? Isn’t this very strange?”

If we were going to fight them head-on sooner or later, then why didn't we just attack Class A directly, instead of wasting energy doing things here and there.

“Go measure your own capability! This is why you have the nickname ‘Brother Idiot’ from the secondary school students nearby.”

“What are you talking about? Stop saying lies which are half true!”

“Ah, I am sorry. It should be the primary school students nearby, right?”

“...... That’s not the wrong part.”

“What...... Do you really have such a strange nickname?”

D... Don’t look at me! Stop looking at me with those looks on your faces!

“Anyway, I don’t plan to get any of your Class D facilities.”

“Of course, this is the best outcome for us...... but are you sure?”

“Of course, but I have one condition.”

That’s right. If we had let them go so easily, then this war would have been meaningless.

“Let’s listen to it first!”

“Don’t worry, it's nothing special. When I give you the signal, I want you to break that thing by the window. That’s all.”

Yuuji’s finger was pointing at the external section of the air conditioner outside the window.

However, that machine didn’t belong to Class D. Class D's facilities were just normal things you could find in a slightly poorer high school, which didn’t include anything like an air conditioner. It was there because there was no space in the owner's class, so they placed it outside Class D’s classroom.

“Class B’s external section for their air conditioner?”

“Of course, breaking it might cause you to be scolded by the teacher, but this trade should sound good enough for you, right?”

If they ‘accidentally’ broke it, they would just, at most, get serious warnings from a teacher. However, if doing so could help them avoid staying in the broken room for three months, there was no better deal than this.

“This definitely sounds good to us. But why do you want to do this?”

Hiraga’s question was very reasonable. If our aim was Class A, why are we doing unrelated things like targeting Class B and breaking their air conditioner?

“That’s related to our tactics against Class B.”

“Is it? Then I shall gratefully take your offer.”

“I will talk to you again the day after tomorrow, at about this exact time. You can go back now.”

“OK, thanks. Hope you can defeat Class A according to plan.”

“Haha, stop saying things you don't mean. You're actually thinking that we'll definitely lose, right?”

“That’s right. Class F can never win against Class A. That’s just wishful thinking.”

Class D class leader Hiraga raised his hand and then left the scene.

“Everyone! Thanks for the hard work today! Tomorrow, we will be recovering the scores we've used, so everyone should head back and have a good rest! That’s all for today!

After Yuuji gave out the commands, everyone chatted with each other and walked back to the classroom to pack their stuff before leaving.

“Yuuji, should we go as well?”

“Yeah!”

The feeling of winning was really great, but to tell the truth, I was really tired. Tomorrow, we will continue the war, so I should just head back and rest!

“Ah, w... wait, Sakamoto.”

“Huh?”

When Yuuji was preparing to leave with everyone else, someone stopped him. That person was Himeji.

“Oh, Himeji, it’s you!”

“Actually, I have something to ask Sakamoto.”

She pressed her hand against her chest, looking a bit excited. It must be something important; maybe I should avoid them and leave?

“Oh, I know.”

After saying that, Yuuji walked toward Himeji and chatted in front of me. I hardly heard what they were talking about, and somehow, I felt a bit lonely.

Himeji just stared at Yuuji like she was really concentrating and totally forgetting my existence; it had to be something important.

Huh? Could it be...... Himeji actually didn’t realize my existence? Could she have never noticed me at all? Damn! If that's the case, I'll just pull up her skirt until I'm satisfied!

''“This is a good chance, Akihisa. Let’s just pull the skirt! Isn’t about time to see the underwear of such a pretty girl?”'' [http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume1_Translator%27s_Notes#Question_5]

What! Are you the devil in my heart? Damn! Are you here to tempt me to the path of a delinquent? Don’t look down on me! My sense of justice will not lose!

Eh? Where is the angel? Where is the angel in my heart? Wait, come out now! Isn’t this showing that I only have an evil heart?

“Anyway, I was a little bit interested in the beginning, but because that guy came and talked to me about it, I became more interested in it.”

While I was fighting with my own mind, the two of them were walking toward me.

“Eh, why would Yoshii say something like that?”

Both of them didn’t know about the fight I had in my heart and continued to chat.

“Come to think of it, he did mention about what happened during the class division test. Maybe it's related to that, which means even idiots have things they won't give up.”

Yuuji was talking in a very friendly way, adding some jokes in between the conversation. Looking at him, what was he talking about? Could it be a love confession? Himeji liked Yuuji?

“Class division test, that’s right.”

“I can only say this much, but Himeji, I think your guess is correct.”

I see, no wonder Yuuji looked so proud. Being loved by such a cute girl, there was no reason why he wouldn’t feel happy.

By the way, why hasn’t the angel in my heart come out?

“Oi, Akihisa. We should go back now.”

“Ah, OK. Have you finished chatting with Himeji?”

“Yep, now her resolve is stronger. Right, Himeji?”

After being asked by Yuuji, Himeji's face immediately turned red, and I could even imagine a “Boom” sound effect above her head. This skill was really stunning.

“Oh, is it? I'm not sure what's going on, but let's go. Bye, Himeji.”

“Ah, yes! See you tomorrow!”

Himeji’s face was still red. She kept waving her hand and saw Yuuji and me leave the classroom.

''“Nothing’s wrong with pulling up her skirt, right?”''

The angel in my heart, you were too slow! And even you agreed with pulling up her skirt?

<center>☆</center>

“Right.”

“Huh?”

“Was it really necessary to fight Class D? There are many other ways to break the air conditioner, right?”

“Ah, you’re talking about that?”

We were on the way home, and because our houses were in the same direction, we usually went home together.

“There are many other reasons, like making everyone get used to the Test Summoning War, to give pressure to other classes, to improve self confidence, to increase our morale, and so on.”

“I see. Then why don’t we take the Class D facilities?”

“That’s because our final target is Class A. If we take the facilities from Class D, some of the students could be satisfied and start to go against the Test Summoning War. To avoid something like that from happening and to maintain the energy everyone has due to dissatisfaction, I purposely made that decision.”

Surprisingly, this guy thought a lot. After listening to Yuuji, I couldn’t imagine him as a person with bad results. Or I should say... I saw the ‘Genius’ again.

“Can we win against Class A?”

“Of course, leave it to me.”

“Thanks, for the trouble I caused because of me being stubborn.” [Editor Note: What are this and the next sentence supposed to mean?]

“Not really. The reason why I come to this school is to do something big in the Test Summoning War.”

Yuuji unintentionally looked into the distance.

When Yuuji was a kid, he was called ‘Genius’. However, his past glory had faded. Yuuji never said anything about it, but he’s most likely where he is now because of his lack of motivation to study.

The test scores would become the power of the syokanju in the Test Summoning War. Although Class F’s results were obviously bad, if they used their intelligence and strength and strength in this war and won against Class A, it would prove that those who couldn’t study could also stand on top. I think that’s what Yuuji wanted to prove.

“To achieve our goal, you need to help me. Anyway, let’s concentrate on recovering the scores tomorrow.”

“Che.”

This meant we were going to have tests tomorrow. We used up a lot of scores today, so it looks like we are going to have tests on every subject tomorrow. Oh no, it would be tests for the whole day!

“Don’t just play games, read some books before you sleep!”

“Alright, alright. I will at least read the boo....eh?”

This is so strange, why is my bag so light? Maybe....

“Ah, my text books! I forgot about them under the Japanese-style table!”

“Idiot, hurry back and get it.”

“Aww..... Then you go back first.”

“Of course, why should I wait for you?”

“I just knew it, you are heartless.”

I was nearly home. Complaining wasn’t going to help, so let’s just get the book and go home!

I thought about that and ran to the school, which only had a few students participating in club activities left.

“Oh man.”

I sighed and put on my indoor shoes, then headed toward the Class F classroom.

“I’m back!”

Just as if I went back to my own home, I shouted once and walked into the classroom. Because of the Japanese-style table and tatami, this room looked more like home than a classroom.

“Y...Yoshii?”

“Eh? Himeji?”

Himeji was in the classroom, which I thought was empty.

“W... What’s wrong?”

She looked panicked. What’s wrong with her?

I looked towards Himeji’s seat (?), and saw cute letter paper and an envelope on the Japanese-style table.

“Ah, T... This is...”

What was she doing? Although I didn’t know what they were for, it looked just like she had prepared the paper and envelope and was ready to write a love letter for Yuuji.

''“Face the truth, it is a love letter.”''

Shut up, the devil in my heart! I won’t be deceived by your lies! Even if you say so, what proof do you have to show that this is a love letter?

“This is, ah....”

“OK, I understand, no problem.”

“Eh---- Wa!”

With a crashing sound, Himeji tripped on the Japanese-style table.

The letter she was hiding at her back flew in front of me, and I accidentally saw one of the sentences.

'''''“I like you.”'''''

''“Nothing can prove that this is a love letter more than this right?”''

[[Image:BTS vol 01 117.jpg|thumb]]
“......”

''“Understand? This is the truth.”''

“......”

''“Isn’t it time to give up?”''

I folded the letter that flew towards me, and returned it to Himeji.

To show that I was a caring person, I joked:

“This letter of unfortunate is really special!”

''“Are you prepared to neglect it until you die?”''

What are you talking about, you stupid devil! Every time you say something, it causes me misfortune! I won’t be cheated anymore!

“Er, I think you are mistaken......”

“You don’t have to do that, just come to me and tell me, I can do it directly. Ah don’t worry, I will go to borrow the stun gun from Yamashita next door. ”

“Yoshii, this is not letter of unfortunate!”

“No way! This is the letter of unfortunate! I am feeling very unfortunate now!”

“Yoshii.”

I swung my arms like a kid, and suddenly something soft grabbed my hand. When I looked properly, Himeji was holding my hand, tried to stop me from going berserk.

“Calm down, acting like this will harm yourself.”

Her voice was filled with warning.

When I calmed my darkened heart down, these hopeless facts were starting to corrupt my heart.

“...... There is nothing I can do....... I have to accept it.”

My knees felt powerless and I just knelt down. What’s going on? Why did I get this losing feeling in two days continuously?

The person who would receive the letter is Yuuji right? I am concerned about it.

“The person receiving it is our class---”

“Yes, he is our classmate.”

Himeji blushed, but she answered my question without hesitation.

Then it was obvious. That’s right, that person was Yuuji. However I didn’t want to name it and embarrass Himeji.

“Is it? What is good about that guy? Maybe his outlook is acceptable!”

“Ah, no, what attracts me is not the outlook. Ah, of course I like the outlook!”

“Damn! I hate that guy from the bottom of my heart.”

“Is...it?”

“Yeah, for me as a person with no confidence in outlook, that sounds too good.”

“Eh? Why? You look very handsome! My friend is interested in you!”

“Eh? Are you sure?”

Even I think that her friend is mad.

“Yeah. Although I am not too sure about the details, but when she saw you and Sakamoto walking together, she would say ‘Muscular looking Sakamoto and Beauty looking Yoshii walking together, look just like a piece of drawing’.”

“Your friend is a good person, you have to be good to her.”

“Other things she says are ‘Yoshii will be the uke[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume1_Translator%27s_Notes#Question_5]’ and so on.”

“I take back my words, stay away from her! That world is still too early for you Himeji.”

Yuuji and I.... *vomit*!

“Anyway, besides the outlook, isn’t his inner side good as well?”

“Ah, Err....Yes....”

“That’s right, his liver looks very strong and healthy!”

Should be able to sell it at a good price I think?

“That’s an organ inside the body.”

“That, although I think it is not possible, is the personality of that person good?”

“Of course, no problem!”

Waa.. I never imagined Himeji would speak so loudly. I was scared. I never knew she liked Yuuji so much.

“What’s good about his personality?”

“Very...very gentle....”

Gentle?

The person who cheated me to go and got hit in Class D, and nearly broke my arm was a gentle person?

“I'll give you the numbers now, have you prepared your pens and paper? Don’t worry, he is a very good Cranial nerve surgeon. ”

“My brain is perfectly fine!”

How could it be possible? What made you think that he was gentle? What kind of cruel family did you grow up in, Himeji?

“Gentle, bright and optimistic, he is my idol!”

Listening to her honest comment, it gave me a strong feeling that made me unable to laugh at her.

“About that letter..”

“Y...Yes.”

“Good luck.”

In a situation like this, I couldn’t do anything to destroy the relationship. Since Himeji liked Yuuji so much, as a fellow classmate, I couldn’t stop myself from cheering for her.

“Yes!”

The smiling Himeji was just too adorable; I really envied Yuuji from the bottom of my heart.

<center>☆</center>

The next day, I went to school as usual.

In order to replenish the scores we lost in the war, we had to undergo a whole day of tests, I needed to do my best now.

“Good morning---”

Along with the ‘kala--kala’ sound effect, I opened the classroom door.

It was still tatamis and Japanese tables in the classroom. I still felt a little bit pity for not getting class D facilities.

“Oh, Akihisa. You are nearly late! ”

“Ah. Good morning, Yuuji ”

Yuuji arrived earlier before me in the classroom, he sat down near the Japanese table beside mine, with the English textbook in his hand. It seemed he was still planning to do some last minute studying before the test.

“Nobody complain about anything?”

“Huh? Complain about what?”

“About Class D facilities.”

We all put so much effort and won the war, but eventually we didn’t take the enemy facility, it would be normal that some of us to feel unhappy about it.

“Ah, that! I have explained about it with everyone, so no problem at all.”

“Oh.”

I think it's because of Yuuji’s performance yesterday that makes people follow his order so well. Besides when they knew it is possible to win against higher level classes, they lost interest in the facilities of Class D!

“By the way, are you all right?”

“What?”

“About what happened yesterday.”

What, which event is he talking about...... Ah, is it about Yuuji’s execution?

“Ah, even idiot like me will give up doing idiot stuff like that after knowing my nails will be pulled off for doing that.”

“No, I am not talking about what you plan to do to harm me.”

Then what is it you want to talk about? I totally don’t know what Yuuji is trying to tell me.

“What are you trying to say----”

“Yoshii!”

“Wa!”

My speech was broken by a punch from nowhere.

“Sh...Shimada, good morning....”

“This is not the time to say good morning!”

Shimada looked like she was really angry.

I was lying on the ground now and able to see her underwear, but I was not feeling happy at all.

“You idiot, if you couldn’t save me yesterday, that’s fine. But how dare you use the fire extinguisher to break the window, and then blame it on me!”

Oh, now I remember.

“And thanks to you, my ranking on ‘'The Most Unwilling to be Her Boyfriend” is even higher now!”

That’s surprising; I thought you are at the top of that rank already.

“I was planning to tie you up for interrogating and torturing. ”

Suddenly, Shimada calmed down.

By the way, before you tied me up, hadn't you hit me enough already?

“I think you have enough punishment already, I shall forgive you this time!”

“Yeah, I can’t stop my nose from bleeding till now!”

“No, I didn’t mean that.”

“Huh? Then what do you mean?”

“The first test we have today is math.”

Shimada looked really happy--- happy from the bottom of her heart and said:

“And Funakoshi sensei is supervising the test.”

The moment I heard this sentence, I dashed out from the classroom and ran on the corridor.

<center>☆</center>

“Ha....This is tiring.”

I lied on the table and sighed.

Finally we finished the tests on four subjects. The tests by themselves were exhausting, suffering the questioning by Funakoshi sensei at the same time made me even more exhausted.

By the way, I introduced an otaku[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume1_Translator%27s_Notes#Question_5] living around my house (thirty nine years old/ single..... should be male) to Funakoshi sensei, and told her that’s all I wanted to tell her yesterday.

“Hmm, you look exhausted.”

Hideyoshi came from nowhere and said.

He had a pony-tailed hair style today. Owww...... this is exactly what I liked. He is a guy, but he was tempting me with that pose now.

“......(nodding his head like mad)”

Silent pervert, who was always quiet and you could hardly felt his presence, was beside Hideyoshi.

“Good, let’s have lunch now. I will have ramen, katsudon, fried rice with curry today. ”

Yuuji is still looking energetic and standing up, you can’t see any bit of tiredness on his face. What material is he made of? And he eats too much for his lunch.

“Hmm? Yoshii you guys are heading to cafeteria? Can I stick with you guys?”

“Ah, Shimada you want to come as well? No problem for me!”

“Then I shall go with you guys.”

“.....(nod)”

Silent pervert nodded and agreed, maybe he was planning something? Idiot, there was nothing good from a tomboy like Shimada.

“Yoshii, are you thinking something bad about me?”

“Definitely NO.”

Her sixth sense was scary.

Anyway, I finally got the chance to rest in the lunch break, I should eat something nice to recover my strength! However you couldn’t really get anything nice from the cafeteria.

“Then, I will be luxurious today, and have a salted water meal today.”

“Err, everyone...”

When we stood up and prepared to head towards cafeteria, someone’s voice stopped us.

“Hmm? Ah, Himeji is that you? Want to go to cafeteria together with us?”

“Ah, no. Err.... it’s about l...lunch. That, I promised everyone yesterday....”

Himeji looked at us uneasily, what’s wrong?

“OOH, could it be the lovely lunch?”

“Y,Yes, if it is OK for everyone.”

She took out the package from her back after she said that.

Really? Himeji, you are really a good girl! Thanks to you, I might be able to live a few days longer!

“Of course it is ok for everyone, right? Yuuji!”

“Yeah, that’s right. Thank you.”

“Is it? That’s great.”

Himeji shows a happy smile. This is so strange, she is the one who made the lunch, but she is happier than us who are eating it for free, I really don’t understand what gentle girls are thinking.

“Hmph...Mizuki you are pretty aggressive...”

Shimada stared at me fiercely as if I was the murderer who killed her dad.

I don’t understand fierce girls thinking either.

“Then, since we have someone making lunch, let’s eat at the rooftop instead of the classroom.”

“That’s right.”

For such a high class food, it is not acceptable to be eaten in a lousy room filled with rotten tatamis and smelly smell from guy’s sweat. We should go to an enjoyable location such as the rooftop, enjoy the food there and feel grateful to the chef.

“Is it? Then you guys can go there first.”

“Huh? Yuuji, where are you going?”

“I'll go to get some drinks, as a treat to you guys for the effort yesterday.”

“Ah, then I will go with you! You can’t take so many drinks at the same time right?”

It was very rare to see Shimada being so caring; did she take the wrong medicine?

“Thanks.”

“OK.”

Yuuji agreed without a doubt. If it was me, I was sure I would feel worried to be taken to somewhere and got beaten badly.
“Remember to keep a share for us.”

“Don't worry, but I can’t guarantee anything if you come too late.”

“I don’t think I will be late. Let’s go!”

Yuuji and Shimada took their wallets and left the classroom, looks like they were heading to the cooperative store on the first floor.

“We should get going as well.”

“Yeah.”

I took over the package from Himeji, and walked to the rooftop.

These lunch boxes are pretty heavy, it seems that she put a lot of effort into making lots of different dishes, I am so touched.

“Great, the weather is pretty good!”

“Yeah!”

We walked to the roof top and opened the door, and a clear sky without any clouds welcomed us. This was the best weather for eating lunch box.

“Ah, I have brought the cushion.”

Himeji took out the cushion for picnic out of the package. She seems to be well prepared, maybe she has brought the whole set of equipment for picnic?

We felt exited and started preparing together. There was no one else on the roof top, like we had booked the rooftop for ourselves, that’s great.

“This really feels good!”

“.....(nod)”

I lazily lied on the cushion, enjoying the sunlight and the breeze that was blowing towards me.

“Err, I am not very confident....”

Himeji opened the cover of the meal box that was only used during New Year time.

“OH!”

All of us cheered together. It looked so delicious. There were karaage, tempura, onigiri, bamboo shoot rolls and so on. Whatever dishes you could name, all appeared in the lunch box.

“Sorry Yuuji, I will start----”

“....(took a piece)”

“Ah, Silent Pervert you are too cunning!”

Then he smoothly put the food into his mouth---

“…..(fell onto the ground)”

(Sound of Silent Pervert falling to ground.)

Silent Pervert boldly fell down, and his muscles were slightly twitching.

“……”

“……”

Hideyoshi and I looked at each other.

“Wa! Tsuchiya?”

Himeji was panicked and dropped the disposable chopsticks that she prepared to give to us onto the ground.

“……(Suddenly stood up)”

Silent Pervert stood up.

“…….(Great!)”

Then he faced Himeji and raised his thumb.

He probably tried to say “delicious”!

“So, so that suits your taste? That’s good.”

Silent Pervert’s thinking must had been delivered to Himeji, because she looked so happy.

However, Silent Pervert, why did your legs keep on shaking? You looked just like a boxer who was going to get a KO.

“Don’t restrain yourself, eat as much as you can!”

Himeji showed her smile, and told us to eat more.

When she put it this way, it looked like we couldn’t refuse at all. I even had a feeling to eat all of them no matter how awful they were.

However, I still cannot forget silent pervert’s empty looking eye and shaking body.

(Hideyoshi, those dishes, what do you think?)

I used a low volume so that Himeji couldn’t hear, and whispered to Hideyoshi.

(…… No matter how I look at it, it is not faked.)

(That’s right, now we are in deep trouble.)

(Akihisa, is your body strong?)

(To tell the truth, my stomach is very weak. It has degenerated because I rarely eat anything.)

Of course, Hideyoshi and I were using the happiest looking face and talked to each other, we couldn’t allow Himeji to discover our conversation and the shock in our heart.

(Leave this to me!)

Hideyoshi bravely spoke in a low voice.

(Stop kidding, this is too dangerous!)

(No problem. Although I might not look like it, my stomach is very strong. Even sprouted potato can’t harm me.)

(But…)

(Don’t worry! Believe in my iron stomach---)

[[Image:BTS vol 01 133.jpg|thumb]]
He had the outlook of a pretty girl, but he was saying some manly lines. At this moment---

Yuuji appeared on the stage.

“Ah, Yuuji.”

Before we could stop him, he used his hand to take a piece of fried egg.

(Sounds of munching)

(Sounds of Yuuji falling to ground)

(Sounds of juice cans falling on ground)

The juice can fell onto the ground, and spilled everywhere.

“Sa..Sakamoto? Wait, what’s wrong?”

Shimada appeared before him and saw what happened. She immediately dashed towards Yuuji.

There is no mistake about it, Himeji is the real killer chef.

I looked at Yuuji, who was shaking crazily like Silent Pervert.

After that, Yuuji, who was on the floor, used his eyes to ask me:

(Did someone put poison in the food?)

(This is not poison, this is the true ability of Himeji.)

I also used the eye contact to answer his question. This was the secret technique that could only be used by us since we stuck together for a long time; it was very useful in situation like this.

“Ah, my leg… suddenly cramped.”

Yuuji told a kind lie because he was afraid to hurt Himeji’s feeling. Himeji, maybe it is just like what you said yesterday, Yuuji is a gentle guy!

“Ah haha, it must be because you are dashing up and down the stairs right?”

“Ah, maybe that’s the reason.”

“Really? I thought Sakamoto is pretty strong and healthy.”

Shimada, who is totally out of the situation, shows a doubtful face. It seems we should make her get off the stage before she speaks too much.

“By the way, Shimada, the place where your place your hand….”

“Huh? What’s wrong?”

“There is a bug just died there not long ago.”

This is total bullshit.

“What? You should say it earlier!”

She panicked and moved her hand away, this made her look a bit more like a girl.

“I am sorry. You better go to wash the hand.”

“You are right, I will be right back.”

Shimada left the scene. Now the danger was lowered by a little bit.

(We can’t let Shimada eat something like this, right?)

(Of course.)

HAHAHA--- the frank laugh of three guys was spread all over the roof top.

(Akihisa, it is your turn now!)

(D,Don’t be silly, I will definitely die!)

(What happened just now has lowered my determination….)

(Yuuji, eat it! Himeji definitely wants to see you eat it.)

(Is it? I thought this is for you, Akihisa.)

(No way! You don’t understand a girl’s thinking!)

(No, if you put it this way, you are the one here who doesn’t understand---)

(Shut up, stop struggling!)

“Huh? Himeji, what is that?”

“Huh? What?”

Himeji turned around and looked at the direction where my finger was pointing.

(Eat this!)

(Unnn?)

I took the chance and stuffed all the food into Yuuji’s mouth.

Yuuji’s eye had already turn white, I grabbed his lower jaw and helped him to swallow the food---- when you are eating, remember to munch carefully and swallow them slowly.

“Hu, finally finished it.”

“I didn’t know you were so good in torturing!”

Although I am being commented like this by Hideyoshi, I don’t care at all.

Yuuji was lying on the ground, and shaking even more crazily than just now, but I didn’t care as well.

“I am sorry, I think I look wrongly.”

“Ah, I see.”

I could never imagine Himeji to fall for such a classic trick, this is so helpful. But she is too pure; I am worrying for her now.

“The lunch box is very delicious, thanks for the food.”

“Yeah, your cooking skill is very good.”

Thanks to Yuuji, the lunch box was cleared without any problem. Our heart was just as clear as the sky now!

“Ah, that’s fast. Have you finished all of them?”

“Yeah. And Yuuji kept on saying ‘delicious, delicious’, and ate them at the same time.”

Yuuji, who was at the corner of our eyes, weakly shook his head.

Don’t worry, you have left a good impression with Himeji, maybe she will make the lunch for you again.

“Is it? I am so happy.”

“No no no, we are the ones who are happy. Right, Yuuji?”

I signalled Yuuji to show some reaction, since he was still conscious, there should be some reaction from him.

“Argh…argh….T,thanks, Himeji….”

This is so terrible; his eye is looking very empty.

“Talking about good food, there is a café in front of the station that just opened not too long ago.”

In a situation like this, the person who changed the topic was me. This was all for avoiding Himeji to say ‘Then I will bring the lunch for you guys tomorrow’.

“Ah, the comments about that shop are pretty good!”

“Huh? There is a shop there?”

“Yeah. To thank you for the lunch, Yuuji will give you a treat there.”

“You bastard, don’t simply make promises for other people.”

It seemed our tactics were successful. We have finally avoided the crisis.

We were just chatting about everything and enjoying this warm time together.

“Ah, that’s right.”

Himeji put her hands together.

“Huh? What’s up?”

“Actually---”

She put her hand into the bag and searched for something.

“I have prepared dessert as well.”

“Ahh! Himeji, look at that!”

(Akihisa! Even I will die if you do it again!)

Yuuji risked his life to stop my plan.

(Chi, you little bastard, your reaction is pretty quick huh.)

(Akihisa! Are you planning to kill me?)

(There is no other way! This mission can only be done by you, Yuuji! I will leave this to you!)

(Don’t be an idiot! I won’t do it even if you use that frank smile in the shonen manga[http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Baka_to_Tesuto_to_Syokanju:Volume1_Translator%27s_Notes#Question_5] and ask me to do it.)

(You are hopeless.)

(If you say that, why don’t you do it yourself!)

(What! Why did pose like that? What are you trying to do to me?)

(I am going to punch your heart using my fist, and then stuff everything into your mouth after you faint! Take this!)

(No---- Crazy Killer!)

Yuuji held his fist firmly, just one second before the fight began, Hideyoshi quietly stood up.

(…..Let me do it!)

(Hideyoshi don’t be reckless, this is life threatening!)

(And you actually want to sacrifice me?)

Of course! Compared to you smelly guy, Hideyoshi who has a pretty girl outlook is so much more important.

(No problem. My stomach is very strong, eating these at most cause me Dyspepsia.)

That’s true, Hideyoshi’s stomach can nullify the poison, maybe he can resist these desserts.

“What’s wrong with you guys?”

“Ah, no! Nothing at all!”

“Ah, could it be……”

Himeji’s face suddenly darkens.

Did our thinking of not willing to eat these desserts be exposed?

“I am sorry, I left the spoons in the classroom!”

The dessert inside the container was fruits mixed with yogurt (looks like it anyway), so using chopsticks was really not suitable for eating them.

“I will go to get them now.”

Himeji disappeared at the stairs entrance. Now is the chance---

(Use this chance and eat them!)

Hideyoshi held the container in his hand, looked like a warrior who treated death as returning home.

“I am sorry, I will never forget your kindness.”

“Sorry, and thank you.”

Facing us who were bowing and quiet, Hideyoshi smiled, and spoke as nothing happen:

“Don’t make it like I am going to die, I didn’t plan to do so yet!”

“T..That’s right.”

“Ah! Hideyoshi, we are counting on you!”

“OK, leave this to me. I will start eating now!”

Hideyoshi raised his head, and drank the entire object inside the container.

“Munch munch. What, this is just normal----Wa!”

Life is like a flower of virtuality, and another flower has fallen in a blink of an eye.

“..Yuuji…”

“..What?”

“Sorry for forcing you to eat those foods just now.”

“……I am glad you understand that.”

The person, who self proclaimed himself ‘Iron Stomach’, was now lying on the floor with white foam at his mouth.

<center>☆</center>

“By the way Sakamoto, about the next target---”

“Huh? About the Test Summoning War?”

“Yeah.”

After the very happening lunch, everyone revived and casually enjoyed the tea, especially Hideyoshi. He was trying to drink as much green tea as he could, I heard that green tea could help to kill the bacteria!

By the way, Shimada only managed to buy green tea. Although she was very angry, we were very grateful.

“The opponent will be Class B right?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

This reminded me that Yuuji mentioned about destroying the Class B air conditioner machine outside Class D yesterday. What was that for?

Since Class B air conditioner had nothing to do with attacking Class A, would that mean we will be dealing with Class B next time?

“Why Class B? Isn’t our final target Class A?”

Class A was our target. Everyone must be wondering why were we challenging Class B, which was one grade lower than Class A right? By the way I didn’t understand why as well.

“I will be frank.”

Yuuji suddenly turned serious.

“No matter what tactics we use, we can never win against Class A with our fighting ability.”

Admitting we lost before fighting? This was not what Yuuji would do.

However this was not news for us. Fumitsuki Gakuen divided the classes from Class A to Class F, and Class A wasn’t just any ordinary class; you could say their abilities were in a totally different dimension from the others. For all the fifty people in Class A, forty of them were still beatable. They were just normal students whose results were a little bit better than Class B. The remaining ten students were totally different. Especially the Class Leader Kirishima Shouko, her ability was totally out of anyone’s imagination. Even if we managed to attack them by surprise, and surrounded her, we would end up getting beaten up badly.

No matter what tactic you used, if you could not defeat the Class Leader, you could never win the war. Since we couldn’t defeat her, we had no chance of winning at all.

“Then our final target will be changed to Class B?”

Although there was still some distance away from Class A, Class B equipment was pretty good as well, I believed no one would be unhappy about it.

“No, that’s not going to happen. Our final target will still be Class A.”

“Yuuji, this is totally different from what you have just said right?”

I continued the conversation after Shimada, being able to defeat Class A or not meant a lot to me.

“If we fight as a class we can never win, so I decided to challenge them to duel.”

“Duel? How should we do it?”

“Use Class B to achieve that.”

Use Class B? How?

“Do you know what happens when the lower level class loses in a Test Summoning War?”

“Eh? O..Of course!”

Actually, I didn’t know.

(Yoshii, if the lower level class loses in the war, their equipment will be one grade lower.)

Luckily Himeji reminded me from my side. I see, that’s what would happen!

“The equipment will be downgraded right?”

“That’s right. Which means, for Class B, the equipment will the downgraded to Class C equipment.”

“Of course, that’s common sense right?”

“What if the higher level class lose?”

“They will be sad.”

“Silent Pervert, go and bring me a pincer plier.”

“Wait! Are you trying to transform my body into one that will never need to use finger nail cutter?”

I didn’t say anything wrong, they would be sad right?

“They will need to exchange the equipment with the lower class.”

Himeji helped me answer this question again; she was such a good girl.

“Yeah, I am going to use this rule, and negotiate with them.”

“Negotiate?”

“If we win against Class B, I will ask them to attack Class A, so that they won’t have to exchange the equipments with us. Even if they lose to Class A, they will only get the equipment of Class C’s level, which is much better than the Class F equipment, this should work smoothly.”

“Hmph, then?”

“I will use this to negotiate with Class A, and warn them ’we will start attacking you after you have finished fighting with Class B’.”

“I see.”

It must be tiring for them to fight another war after they finished the fight with the second level class in the same year.

Although this was the same for Class F, we had our unhappiness which motivated us. We might not be as smart, but we were very motivated.

However it was very different for Class A. They wouldn’t get anything from winning the war, and they didn’t want to waste time with an opponent like Class F, the morale between Class A and us would be very different.

“However, there is a problem with this tactic. This might cost more energy, the process is troublesome, but compared to a duel, the Test Summoning War is much more secure war to win against Class A right? Also---”

“Also?”

“Are you sure we can win in the duel? They must already know that Himeji is in our class.”

After Class F won against Class D, everyone would definitely focus on the winner. Himeji was not our secret weapon now. Therefore, they must have prepared tactics to fight against Himeji.

“I am well aware of this and well prepared, don’t worry.”

Yuuji looked confident, which was totally different from me, who was really worrying now.

“Anyway we will need to fight against Class B first, I will fill everyone with the details later.”

“Is it? Well, it is fine by me as long as you have tactics about it.”

If there was no chance of winning, he wouldn’t be able to say something like that right?

“By the way, Akihisa.”

“Huh?”

“After the tests today, go declare war to Class B.”

“No way. You can go to do it yourself.”

No matter what you say, I won’t change my mind.

“Well, let’s decide who will do the job using paper scissor rock.”

“Paper scissor rock?”

Well, at least this is better than him forcing me to go.

“OK, I accept the challenge.”

“Good, then who ever lose will go, ok?”

Yuuji nodded and said:
“It will be boring if we just play normally, let’s include a psychological battle as well.”

This was Yuuji’s suggestion.

About the psychological battle, it is that, right? Everyone said what they would use, and then guessed whether the opponent would do as they said or lie. I see, this is interesting.

“I understand now, I am going to use rock.”

Yuuji made a pose for paper scissor rock, and told me:

“Are you? Then I am---”

Yuuji, what will you think? Am I going to be honest and use rock, or use others? This is a fight of intelligence as well.

“If you don’t use rock, I will kill you!”

Wait…. What kind of psychological battle is that?

“Ready? Paper, scissor, rock!”

“Waaa!”

Paper----(Yuuji), Rock---(Me)

“Then it is decided, you will go.”

“I will not go!”

I won’t accept this! This is so different from the psychological battle I imagined!

“Are you still worrying about being beaten up badly like in Class D last time?”

“That is one of the reasons!”

“If that’s the reason, you can rest assured, I can guarantee that it won’t happen again.”

Yuuji stared at my eyes.

I won’t be cheated! You keep using the same technique and asking me to do the dirty work!

“Because there are a lot of people in Class B who like handsome boy.”

“Really? Then there is nothing to worry about!”

Only I can complete this difficult mission, the responsibility is huge!

“However you are so ugly……”

Yuuji had a long sigh. Nonsense, that was not true!

“You are so impolite! I am a handsome boy when I look at myself from three hundred and sixty five degrees!”

“There is 5 degrees extra.”

“I think there is only 5 degree!”

“I hate you two.”

I only mixed up three hundred and sixty five days in a year and degrees of circle, so why are you using the magnifying glass to look at my small mistake! Damn!

“Anyway I will leave this to you!”

Yuuji’s voice came from my back, as the lunch time ended; the afternoon which was full of tests had just started.

<center>☆</center>

“I would like to listen to your explanation.”

The test in the afternoon had ended safely; it was now after school time.

I used my hand to cover the sleeve that had been pulled into pieces, and walked towards Yuuji slowly.

“This is just as I thought.”

“Wa--- I am going to kill you! I will cut you into pieces!”

“Cool down.”

“Urgh!”

A…attack at the heart….this is terrible.

“I will head back home now. Tomorrow morning we will have tests, don’t oversleep.”

After saying that in with a frank tone, Yuuji left the classroom. You are a Devil!

“Urgh….my stomach….”

My whole body was in serious pain, it looked like before the effect that Yuuji’s technique caused on my body disappeared, I couldn’t move at all.

I could only lie on the ground and watched every classmate leave the classroom. No one is worried about me, and bringing me to the nursing room. Am I so hateful? Although I think Himeji will worry about me and come to me.

Because I couldn’t move my body, I turned my neck and looked around in the classroom. I saw Himeji still remaining in the classroom, holding her back and looking around as well. She looked very suspicious, it seems like she was guarding something.

---Ah, now I remember, Himeji wrote a letter yesterday right? Maybe she was thinking where she should put her letter.

“Urgh…”

I felt shy about continuing watching her, so I slowly crawled out the classroom.

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| Forward to [[Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume1_The_Sixth_Question|The Sixth Question]]
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</noinclude>

CubexCursedxCurious:Volume1 Chapter1

2009-03-15T04:10:08Z

OceanBlue: Stopped at, " 'I'm not sure what happened, but I've won. I feel great.' "

===Chapter One: Night of Rubik's Cube===

"...What is this? Custard pudding?"

The girl said as she poked the yellowish-white object in front of her with a sulky expression.

"Have a taste and you'll know."

"Hmmm... hm?! T-this...."

She guided the spoon into her mouth, then froze up.

"It's not sweet! This is a fake! What a nasty food... When you say a soft pedestal and a black sauce, it just has to be a pudding!"

"Don't say nasty to the food. It's just tofu, a solidified soybean soup. You didn't like it?"

Haruaki sat just opposite of the girl after removing the apron he had on.
The girl's ill temper was obvious as she chewed the Yakko-Doufu. She was now wearing a borrowed shirt and hot pants.

"Hmph, it's not bad. It's inferior to the crunchy snack I was munching earlier, though."

"Poor tofu, being compared to a rice-cracker."

"So, that was called a rice-cracker. Now, that one had a unique food texture. It was sweet but spicy at the same time, and that feeling while crunching at it... h-huh?
Why are you looking at me?"

Haruaki simply answered that it was nothing, and looked away from the face that said she was caught off-guard. He started eating, too. Haruaki thought that this situation was just like what the old sayings wanted to share: to eat while you can, since you can't fight a war with an empty stomach.
The girl who sat opposite of him unnecessarily checked that the food in front of her was a fish, looking at the broiled mackerel pike as if she had never seen one before.
After her thorough observation, she placed down the spoon and fork she was holding. Haruaki imagined what she was going to do and initiated a warning before the girl's
bare hands got the mackerel.

"Wait. You'll have to go over my dead body first before you can eat something with bare hands in front of me."

Haruaki reached for the mackerel plate to prevent her hands from grasping it, but for some reason the girl suddenly backed off the tatami space she was sitting on.

"Hey wait. I just misunderstood things earlier. I was a little confused at first, but I'm alright now. I even lent you those clothes, didn't I?"

"I-I'm not sure.... I mean, you recently played with THAT part of my body earlier in front of the gate..."

"But I didn't know I was touching THAT part of your body. Oh hell, I'm sorry anyway. Just forgive me already, 'kay?"

Haruaki asked her a cliched apology while he started on the mackerel pike with his chopsticks.

"Watch me on how to dismantle this mackerel. Just do it first like this, then grab its head, and then pull it away with those nasty fishbones. It's easy, isn't it?"

The girl watched with interest for a while, but she quickly recovered her wary face. After a few seconds, she snorted with an ill temper as she sat back in front of the table.

"By the way, what's your name?"

"...I'm called Fear."

Fear quickly shut her mouth, as if she were surprised that she'd told him her name.

"Fear, is it?"

"Well, yes. It's none of your business though... you can just call me whatever you want."

"Unfortunately, you're part of my business now. You just became my top priority. In fact, the way you became my top priority was almost foul play. So, what are you anyway?
What kind of box are you?"

"Er..."

"Er?"

Without warning, she raised her eyebrows in outrage and started making holes in the broiled mackerel, just after Haruaki raised a question mark at her answer.

"Shut up! It's none of your business, you fool!"

"Whoa! What kind of cursing was that?! I haven't heard them for a while. Anyway, are you a brat, having an outburst like that?!"

"W-Why you?!"

"I haven't heard that for a while too... wha, hey! Stop attacking that mackerel and close your mouth!"

"Digging up a lady's past like that! You should learn some respect, you shameless brat!"

Haruaki thought that he didn't want to hear that from HER. But being the sensible one, he decided to give up.

"Whew.... Well, I won't push you if you don't want to tell me about your past. I know it's not exactly filled with happy memories."

It seemed that her temper cooled down some because of Haruaki's honest words. She was at a loss for words and turned her face down.

"I... hate that appearance. I wouldn't want to turn into that form unless its absolutely necessary. Someone told me that coming here would be easier with that form so
I had no choice but to give up..."

"Who told you? My old man?"

"He said his name was Honatsu... Are you his son?"

"Yeah. And my name's Haruaki. How's my old man doing?"

"I don't know. He said that he still had something to do over there."

"As much of a freeman as usual, I see. Geez, I'm tired of complaining about him though. As long as he keeps sending money for my living, I'll keep up with his game."

"I don't understand you two... I mean, you and your father. I thought an ordinary man wouldn't try to understand the likes of me."

"We've been receiving cursed tools like you since I was a kid. Usually, tools that we accept are those with a slight curse in it, but there are rare occasions where a tool who
can assume human form like you comes here for help."

After a brief silence, Fear let out a sigh and placed down the fork she was holding. Her serious gaze pierced Haruaki as she looked up, her silver hair swaying slightly.

"I'm going to say something serious."

"....Go ahead."

"I... I was placed in some dark dungeon, thrown away long ago by my last owner. Yachi Honatsu came one day and found me. He tried to talk to me, and I told him my wish."

"A wish?"

Haruaki already had an idea what her wish was. But, cursed tools who came here with their own will were often the ones who needed to confirm the purpose of their existence
by putting them into words. Knowing that, he chose to let her say it out loud from her own mouth.

The girl who was not human answered in a whisper, biting her lips softly,

"I want to free myself from my curse."

"How much do you know...? About the curse, and about tools like me?"

"Well, here's what I know; First, a tool changes its quality into negative direction if it continues to receive negative thoughts.
Second, a tool that receives negative thoughts often affect the owner and the people around it.
And third, in exchange with the negative effect it brings upon the people around it, it may show mysterious charm and function..."

"Is that all?"

Haruaki narrowed his eyes and looked at Fear, who was speaking with her eyes looking down at the table.

"To add one more, I know that after receiving all the negative thoughts and curses from humans, an item would become... something that's in front of me right now."

Yes. A tool which received too much grudge from humans will earn a human quality----

Haruaki didn't know the specific details, but he knew that an item gains a personal thought which affects its essence as a tool. It was a result of receiving grudges from people
over and over again. In the end, they'll possess their own mind, soul, and an ability to change forms with its own will.

"That's right. It started with a single grudge. I was made to harm people and because of it, I had received much hatred, grievances, and murderous intents. From those grudges,
I was branded with an abominable curse of [driving my owner into insanity.]"

Haruaki noticed that the girl was gripping her hands tightly. He thought it was better not to ask more about her about concrete details of the tool that she was and
about what she meant by driving her owner into insanity.

"My curse doesn't end there. The grudge I received gave me [human qualities] and my own will. To me who was nothing but a tool in the beginning. Let me correct, I was not given;
I was forced to have those capabilities. Have you ever thought about how bad the affinity between a will and a curse was? I envy those tools which only have a slight curse. They won't
realize by themselves that they were burdened by a curse. How fortunate it is to be blessed with ignorance!"

For a moment, she took a deep breath.

"I came here believing in Honatsu's words that I can free my curse here in this place. That's the reason why I came, but I was not told about the details of what I have to do. Tell me
honestly---- Will I, will I be able to lift the curse from myself without affecting the people around me? Remember that Honatsu sent me to you, so that makes you my current owner. If you're
just lying about here being a place to free one's self from a curse, you would be the first to receive the harmful effects that come with it."

Her eyes looked straight into his. But those eyes reflected undeniable fright and doubt.
That was why Haruaki simply told her,

"Yes, you can."

"....Huh?"

"I said you can free yourself from your curse here. You see, I don't have strong spiritual sense or special ability like my father, but it seems that I have a unique body constitution which
repels curses, which makes me unaffected by them. So, whatever your curse is, it doesn't work on me. Hahaha! Be afraid of me, you violent little girl!"

"What the...?! Wait, you said that I could lift my curse here, but how?"

"I'm not sure about the details, but this place has been a very pure land for a long time, and the area where this house was built was the center of the pure energy that comes from the land.
That's why just being here would fill you with positive energy. They say that this place is protected by some kind of force field, though the rate of cleansing is kinda slow. Just leaving the tools here would eventually lift the curse."

Haruaki remembered the woman who set the force field around the house. Her outfit caught many eyes, and she said that the force field would last for the next hundred years. He supposed that
there won't be a chance to see her again, if the force field would really last that long.

"And, there's another way of lifting a curse. The mechanic is simple; if a curse comes from negative thoughts, you just have to receive positive thoughts by helping people around you. If you keep on
receiving them, the curse will be neutralized eventually."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean to say that you have to vaguely perform acts that people will be thankful for, I suppose. You just have to live here and work as a part-timer or volunteer for public events... I think?"

"W-Wait, why was there a question mark in the end?"

Fear leaned forward, which sent the mackerel bits flying at Haruaki's face. He wondered if Fear did that on purpose.

"Well, its not like I actually experienced trying to lift a curse from myself. That was just what I heard."

She puffed out her cheeks like a child, making a sullen expression.

"I can't believe it... I mean, I don't think that simply sleeping or working here would lift the curse. Besides, I doubt that my curse could be lifted in a leisurely phase..."

"You're right about going leisurely. Being able to assume human form would mean that many curses have been gathered in your body, so it would take years to free yourself. I don't know any
other ways of lifting a curse, so maybe you'll just have to be patient about it."

"Hmmmmmmmmmmm, I still can't believe it."

"Don't worry so much about it. Even if you can't believe for----"

Ding dong. The door bell rung suddenly. Fear seemed to be frightened by it, so Haruaki told her that it was just a bell that said there was a visitor. He stood up and pointed at the table.

"The food'll grow cold, so eat it now. Especially the mackerel pike."

<center>* * *</center>

"Good evening, Haruaki-kun."

A familiar smile greeted Haruaki as he opened the door. The smiling girl was wearing big round glasses like ones that you'd see in a manga. She had an apron around her well-endowed
body and it was impressionable. The pot that she was holding reinforced the familial impression that shrouded her.

"Hey, Konoha. What is it?"

"I've made too much Nikujaga for myself, so I thought that I'd share some with you. Its a bit late already, so maybe you can have it for your breakfast tomorrow."

"That'll be a great help. I was just having my dinner right now... Oh yeah, it's just great that you came now. I have a favor to ask of you."

Konoha slanted her head in question. At that exact moment, Haruaki heard footsteps coming toward him.

"Hey, Haruaki. The food was kind of lacking in quantity. Isn't there any left? I would like to request for a rice cracker if there's still any left."

"You eat too fast!"

Needless to say, the person who came behind Haruaki was Fear.

"Um, Haruaki-kun? Who is that child?"

"Oh yeah, the favor I was going to ask you was about---"

An openly belligerent voice came from Fear as she broke into the conversation.

"Hey, you there! We've just met and you started calling me a child. How dare you speak to me like that, you unfortunate-looking woman!"

"Unfortunate-looking....?!"

Konoha was still smiling, but Haruaki sensed a dangerous aura coming out from her. Fear stood behind him with arms crossed, looking aggressively at Konoha.
Haruaki thought he saw a lightning bolt run between Konoha and Fear.

"You two there. Why are you raising a hostile aura in front of my house?"

"I think you're just imagining things. I'm not angry, really. After all, they're just words of a CHILD."

At that moment, Haruaki felt a violent aura rising behind him. He sensed danger, so he quickly changed the topic.

"Er....Oh yeah! Hey Konoha, have you made anything else besides this? I mean, have you eaten your dinner? Why don't you eat here for a change? It's been a long time since the last time you ate here.
It seems that I have to cook more food anyway."

"Well, if you say so... I think I will. Come to think of it, it has been a long time since the last time we ate together, Haruaki-kun."

"My cooking skills haven't improved though."

"It was great, so don't worry. I think I'm getting hungry just thinking about the dishes you make."

Konoha smiled and entered the house. Suddenly, an insulting snort came out from nowhere.

"Go ahead and eat. Hah, I think that being able to send all the nutrients you eat to your breasts is some kind of talent. I bet that your brain's very light."

Haruaki heard a clashing metal sound. Almost at the same time, he saw Konoha kneeling on the floor, catching the pot that almost fell from her hands.
He looked at the floor and saw the handle of the pot, which was cut cleanly in half.

"...I think it's very sad when a person eats, but the nutrients don't go to their breasts... Oh, I was just talking to myself."

"W-Why you?!"

"Ahahaha-- I'll go ahead now."

Konoha let out a feigned laugh and went into the living room. Fear was staring at her back and was murmuring with hatred;

"What kind of character does that woman have...! Maybe I should curse her!"

"She's not usually like that. In fact, I have this feeling that you were the one who started the fight. Why are you being so hostile anyway?"

"It's none of your business! I just didn't like what she said when she saw me. That's enough reason for my hostility. Besides..."

A weird smile came from her angry expression.

"I just realized now that bullying that cow-tits woman is going to be fun. She'll see, I won't lose the next time...!"

Fear went back into the living room, letting out an evil snort as she walked to the living room.

Haruaki was worried about what could happen if he left those two together in the living room. But, he had to cook some food for Konoha and the hungry juvenile so he had
no choice but to leave those two together in the living room.
Haruaki made a plate full of an easy saute dish. Adding together some rice and miso soup for Konoha, he brought the food into the living room.
He was greeted by a view of two girls throwing dry laughs at each other. Only God knows what happened while he was in the kitchen. He didn't even want to know.

"I only sauted what was left in the fridge. Is that okay for you?"

"No problem. I've made quite lot of Nikujaga anyway."

With a "Ta-da" sound effect, Konoha lifted the lid of the pot she brought with her.
Inside the pot was a steaming soup of brownish broth and beef, letting out a fragrant smell of soy sauce. To put it simply, it looked delicious.
If you'll take a good look at it, you'll notice that an excessive amount of beef was covering all the other ingredients like potatoes. The beef formed a great pile,
just like a mountain sitting on a pot. If you ask me, it's more of a Niku-Niku-Nikujaga instead of a simple Nikujaga.

"Um, so, doesn't that look good?"

"It looks delicious, just as always."

Meat-demon Konoha's face lit up with a smile.

"I see, this definitely looks delicious. You can easily see that it was made by a gluttonous incarnate of appetite."

With that remark, the round lid that Konoha was holding fell on the table, cut into half. Without a word, she picked up the half circles and threw them behind her.
After that, Konoha mouthed an Itadakimasu and started eating with a cheerful (that was how Haruaki interpreted Konoha's expression) face.

"I've no clue why or how this meal has turned into a tense atmosphere, but I guess I have to make an easy introduction at least. Konoha, our visitor here is called Fear.
As you might guess, she was sent by my old man."

Konoha sent a look at Fear while she took loads of beef from the pot. Fear, on the other hand, completely ignored her.

"Fear, this is Konoha. Well, what can I say... er, she lives in the room inside the house's outer building, and we're also in the same school level though our classes are different.
She'd been like a childhood friend since I was a kid and----"

"And she's not human."

Fear said without a pretense. It was followed by few seconds of silence and,

".... That's right. She's like your sempai here in this place."

"I thought so. A lid would never break into half by itself. I know that tools who could assume human form could usually keep the nature of their original form even if they turn
into human form----I suppose you're some kind of blade aren't you?"

"Would you answer me if I asked what was your original form?"

Konoha asked with a smile pasted on her face. Fear replied with a snort.
Uncomfortable silence went on as they ate their dinner. All of their plates were almost empty when Fear spoke to Haruaki.

"So, you wanted to say earlier that I could believe what you said because there's a precedent."

"Er....Yeah. that's right. Konoha did a lot of helpful things like working part-time since when she first came here."

"He's right. Thanks to my deeds, I'm almost free from all of my curses."

"Almost, you say. What would happen if you become completely free from curse?"

"Tools with only a slight curse would just turn back into a normal tool. But according to my old man, the negative energy that built up inside the tools who could assume human form
went over the original nature that it had so even if you were able to neutralize those negative thoughts, their human form will be kept. That means that you two will just be
free from the curse that you have."

"So, I won't turn back into my original form..... I see."

"To be honest, I don't know much about it. Just ask my old man once he comes back."

Fear wasn't even listening to Haruaki. She just kept silent and nodded, murmuring "I see... I wouldn't...I see..." as she did.
It was as if she was trying to hide the expression of relief on her face.
Fear finished up the remaining food on her plate and asked a question to Konoha.

"Haruaki said earlier that you've been together with him for more than ten years now. Does it really take that much time?"

"I think it also depends on the degree of your curse, but..."

Two empty plates covered the table. For a moment, two eyes----one silent and one with a hint of hostility----looked at each other.

"The amount of grudge that we'd accumulated within ourselves are so great that whatever you do, we can't easily forget, throw away, or repent for them... You get on my nerves,
but at least, in that aspect, we could have something in common. This is something that could be shared between you and me, as a same ruined state of mind."

Fear started to say something, but just looked away and said;

"....It's the same for me, you know. You get on my nerves too...."

"Well, you just have to take it easy. I think there's nothing I could help with though."

It was a composed statement of a senior. Konoha had said those words with a lot of ease. Fear, of course, just snorted.

After that, Haruaki also finished his meal, so he cleaned up the table with Konoha and went to the kitchen to wash them. When he came back, Fear was hugging her knees and was looking up
at the ceiling with a blank stare. He brought an after-dinner tea, so he handed one to Fear and started drinking his.

"Oh yeah, Konoha, could you bring some of your old clothes? I wouldn't say right now but I just thought that it would be better if Fear had something to wear. I know that the size won't fit though."

"...Sorry for having small breasts!"

"I didn't mention any part of your body that wouldn't fit!"

Haruaki almost dropped the yunomi that came from the opposite side of the table.

"I guess that can't be helped.... Alright, I'll bring some as soon as I can."

"I'm counting on it."

"Say, what are you going to do for tonight, like where'll she sleep?"

"Huh? Well, I suppose she's gonna spend her night here. I'll just lend her one of the Japanese rooms."

"S-She'll be staying here?! Isn't that a bad idea, since I think it is!"

"But you see, the outer building's already full... Kuroe isn't home and her room is locked."

The outer building was made like an apartment, with two rooms inside. Konoha was living there with another housemate, but she was always away for about half a month, so Konoha
didn't really feel that she had a housemate living next door.

"By the way, make the guest room as luxurious as possible. That way, you can compensate for what you did to me."

"Compensate?"

Haruaki asked Fear, and he received a reply with a threatening attitude.

"Don't say you already forgot what you did to my body earlier! Playing with my body like that... I've never had someone put his finger [there]! My face was burning with
embarrassment!"

Haruaki was about to say that Fear was just a box at that time, when he heard a sound of yunomi rolling off on the tatami. He saw that Konoha was trembling as she stood up.
A false smile covered her expression for a while but it eventually broke into tears.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I can't believe it! Have you two already done THOSE kind of things?!"

Konoha ran away from the living room covering her face with her hands.
They just heard the violent sound of the entrance door being shut. Fear just nodded with content and said,

"I'm not sure what happened, but I've won. I feel great."

<center>* * *</center>

Dull-colored stone floor was all that there was. The room smelled of metal and of metal-like stink. The air was congested but it wasn't stagnant.
The air was clear. Clear like the air inside a tomb or a casket.
There wasn't anything that could tell time. There was only a dead space, without a trace of any living things.
The only thing that you could feel from there was the constancy and blockade.
The mass of steel that was left there didn't have anything to do other than to whisper the same words over and over again.
It wasn't even said aloud. It just made circles within its mind. Like an endless loop.
When it's awake, while it's asleep, when it opened its mind, and when it closed its mind.
It's freezing, it's cold, it's dark, it's freezing, it's cold, it's dark, it's freezing, it's cold, it's dark, it's freezing, it's cold, it's dark.
It went on and on-----

She opened her eyes. There was nothing inside the Japanese room. She raked up and embraced the futon that was given to her. There was only the sound of scraping futon.
There was some warmth left in the futon but it was a false warmth... It was just an accumulated heat from covering someone. So, it was the same as having no warmth at all.
Shards of her dream sent a chill down her spine. She knew that there was a difference between this room and the dungeon room where she was kept.
But, however there was a slight warmth and sound inside this room, She couldn't help thinking that this room was the same as the place where she was kept.
She silently opened the sliding door and walked along the porch. Moon light illuminated her path as she arrived in front of another room. She entered.
A boy was sleeping. He was laying in an odd position and his futon came off below his waist. A slight snort came from a faintly smiling face.
The girl kneeled down before the rolled-up futon and slowly reached for it. She stroked it for a while, then she brought it up to her cheeks.
It was someone else's smell.
Someone else's warmth.
That, perhaps, was the first time that she felt those things.

<center>* * *</center>

Next day, during lunch break at school. Haruaki opened the lid of his lunch box and thoughts about the problem he left alone in his house came to his mind.

(I wonder If she'll be alright alone. I left her a note and some leftovers from my lunch box, but... Wait, what if she can't read?)

When Haruaki visited the girl in her room this morning, she was still sound asleep with a happy expression. He tried to wake her but she didn't wake up
so he just left her a note that says he's going to school and he'd left her some food.
Haruaki wondered if she was still asleep. When he woke up this morning, his futon was gone. When he entered the girl's room, he saw that the girl was covered
with HIS futon while hers was abandoned on the corner of her room. How it happened was still a mystery to him.

"Hey Haruaki! What's with you? You petrified all of a sudden after you opened your lunch box... Maybe you should be moving your body more, not just for cooking and housework.
Baseball is great, if you'd just give it a try!"

A classmate whom Haruaki always had his lunch with spoke to him. His name was Hakuto Taizo.

"His withered expression is nothing new, but it does have a different glow compared to his usual expression. Maybe---- he made some girl pregnant? Hahaha!"

"Kana! Enough of your vulgar jokes!"

A girl with healthy sun-kissed skin, Miyama Kana, followed Taizo's teasing with her own.
The class rep, Ueno Kirika, remonstrated Kana about her vulgar remark.

Kirika let out a disgusted sigh and turned to face Haruaki.

"Forget Kana's reckless remark. But, I too think that you lack the concentration that you usually have. Is there some thing that makes you anxious?"

"Huh? No, no, I don't have any problem. Maybe I caught a chill last night."

"Did you hear that Taizo-san? Kirika-chan just said something like this: I'm always looking at Yachi so I know something's wrong with him! Ohh, If there was something I
could do to comfort him..."

"What a villain you are Haruaki! Since when did you steal the class rep's heart? Did you save a princess? Have you set a fire to a forged bill factory? Did you kill someone
in a clocktower with pair of scissors?"

"Both of you! Stop s-saying nonsense! How foolish!"

Taizo and Kana had been Haruaki's friend since his junior high years while Kirika became his friend in high school.

Kirika was a formidable class rep. She was calm and composed at all times and her grades were top-notch. She always wore a knee-length long skirt, which gave her an impression
that she was born two decades later than she should have. She also hated to expose much of her skin, and was always wearing a jersey during physical education classes and
even at summer, she wore a long-sleeved blouse.
Because of this, only few people tried to get close to her and she was often alone during her first few days. It was only Kana, who was friendly to everyone, who forcefully
brought Kirika with them.
There was a specific reason though, why Kirika started to take her lunch together with them.

"Setting aside those worthless remarks, let us proceed to our daily showdown. I'm confident with my fried eggs today. I'll get back for all my previous losses! I'm counting
on you two for the judge."

Kirika opened her lunch box and brought it to Taizo and Kana's table.

"So, Kirika-chan. Do you think you have a chance of success today?"

"I've tasted it several times. Plus, I got hold of the fact that Yachi might have caught a cold... that means his taste organ might not be working well. I decided that today
is the day."

A spirited glare pierced Haruaki.

"Oh...where is she getting all that motivation...?"

"Well, they say that maintaining health is part of the battle. We only care about the taste, so don't worry. After all, we are the judges. Alright, here I go---!"

"I'll have this first! ------Wow Kirika-chan! These fried eggs are just great! I love the crunchy bacon bits!"

"Really now? So, It's great huh? Hehehehe.....!"

Kirika saw the two gave her food a good evaluation and smirked. But, that smirk was off her face immediately since the battle was still ongoing.
The judges reached for Haruaki's lunch box and-----

"Akki's fried eggs are delicious too! It's soooo good! .... Hmm I wonder where this strange taste comes from?"

"Haruaki, what did you add to your fried eggs?"

"I've put some avocados in it. Hehe, I based it from an old cooking manga."

Taizo and Kana looked at each other and nodded. They grabbed the winner's lunchbox and raised it above their heads, looking like funny symmetrical statues holding a
lunch box.

"Um, the tastes were both great but we decided that Haruaki won for his novel idea!"

In that moment, Kirika lowered her head, both her hands shaking.

"Ugh....! Novelty.... They're right. My attention was tied to the taste and I failed to give a thought about an original idea....! So I learned today that a conservative
idea alone is not enough to go against the ever-changing idea these days!"

".....Hey, class rep, I keep telling you that you shouldn't be THAT serious with the battles."

Haruaki tried to reassure her. Kirika raised her head and said;

"I can't keep on losing to a man especially when it's about cooking! I'll win for sure next time!"

He'd already heard that line many times. But, telling that now to the class rep would be suicidal so he kept his mouth shut and just returned a bitter smile.

After that, they proceeded on having their own lunch for a while.
A little later, Haruaki heard a classmate calling out to him that he had a visitor. He looked at the door and saw a familiar face.

"It's Konoha-san! She's just as...well, you know, as always! Damn it Haruaki, please tell her that I, Taizo, send my appreciation for her being as beautiful as
a belladonna!"

"I don't know why Hakuto would choose a poisonous flower to compare her to. It's plain stupid."

Haruaki ignored the conversation behind him and walked over to the door. It was his first time seeing Konoha in school today.

"What's up?"

"There's nothing important, really... It's just that I worry about that girl..."

"I tried to wake her up but she wouldn't so I just left her alone with a note."

"What?"

She froze.

"Was it ok to leave her alone?"

"From what I saw last night, I think that she's harmless enough but, hmmm... now that you mentioned it, I started to worry about her. After all, we didn't talk that much."

"Have you seen her.... original form?"

"Just a little bit, when I saw her for the first time. She was a big mysterious box."

He started to think about something for a moment but decided that he had no idea what she was and shook his head in surrender.

"Well, if you say that she's alright, I guess she is. I suppose there's nothing to worry about."

Konoha bowed her head in good bye and went back to her classroom.

(She said there's nothing to worry about, but....)

When a person starts to worry, it won't leave him until he checked on what was worrying him. It was like having second thoughts about your answer in an examination when you
checked it over for a correction. Haruaki had no choice but to stare at the slow-moving clock inside the classroom and wait for the time to go home.

After the classes, Haruaki and Konoha met in front of the school entrance.

"Don't you have a student council meeting today?"

"I've passed for today. I felt like it."

There was an understanding between the two. Haruaki hurried back to his house together with Konoha who was publicly known as his related cousin.
They arrived at the gate, opened it quickly, then entered the house. There they saw----

"What the?!"

They saw that the inside was horrible. Turned back table was standing in a slant position, its leg piercing the sliding door. The cabinets turned over. On the floor was
unnecessary things that should have been inside the closet scattered all over.

....Just in a half day, his place of rest became a place of chaos. Something extraordinary must have happened here.

Haruaki searched for the silver-haired girl, his heart beating wildly. He found her immediately.
She was lying face-down on the porch. Not a movement from her. He kneeled over her and picked her up.
He tried to talk to her while he shook her body. Her eyes opened and she blinked with a blank stare.
Konoha went to the kitchen to get some water but hurriedly came back.

"We've got a problem! The kitchen too is in wretched condition!"

"Just what in the world happened here... Fear! Come on, Fear!"

"Ugh...... Stop shaking me... I'm alright..."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Oh, you just don't know what I've been through."

Fear sat up and held her head. Her head was drooped as she breathed in and out, as if saying that she was about to say something very important. She raised her head and said;

"Listen... A light green-colored alien with three legs came here a while ago and----"

"Haaaa!"

Before Fear could finish, Haruaki's hand went to the back of her head. A good sound came out from his strike.

"W-what are you doing all of a sudden?! You want me to curse you?!"

"I should be the one asking you what were you doing! I get it, you had nothing to do so you tried to destroy the house didn't you? Look at what you did!"

"Y-you're wrong..."

Fear faced away.

"Then how can you explain my collection of rare dishes being sucked by the vaccuum cleaner?! I could only take it as a presentation of malice against me! Have I done anything
to you?!"

Haruaki cornered her. Fear just made a sullen face and glared at Haruaki.

"Shut up! I don't care what you say about me! I'm feeling sleepy so I'll go get some sleep! Don't even try bothering me!"

She ran away to her room. Haruaki was taken back by her sudden outburst and lost the will power to follow her.

"That little... tsk, she should try to be the one who'll fix these things up! So this is how she repays me for my kindness!"

"...Um, excuse me?"

Konoha was the one who was poking Haruaki's shoulder. She said to Haruaki in an awkward manner;

"I think that in that situation, you have some faults too, you know."

"Why? I can't explain what she did other than playing a prank against me."

"Well, if you try to look at things around you, maybe you'll see what I mean. Try to look over there on the garden. Or at the kitchen"

Haruaki tried to look at where she pointed out. It was totally different from how he left them this morning. He still couldn't see anything other than Fear trying to play a-----

"....Huh?.... That girl... was she trying to...?"

What Fear did first when she entered her room was to mount on a pillow and punch it to get some stress out of her body. The moment she got out of breath, she took the futon out
and covered herself with it. But, that didn't completely take out her anger.

"Hmph....Hmph! That idiot, that shameless brat....! He doesn't have to be so..."

He didn't even try to listen to my explanation. How annoying.
Well, to tell the truth, she wasn't that enthusiastic about trying to explain things to him...

"There's no way I could tell him what I've been up to."

She can't explain THAT to him. It was too embarrassing and too disappointing. She had that much pride, at least. She couldn't help it but----it was annoying.
After letting out a big snort. She rearranged the futon and covered her head again.

<center>* * *</center>

For the few days that Fear spent together with Honatsu, she was taught by him the basic Japanese reading and writing, as well as the common knowledge about the modern world.
That was why Fear was able to read the note that Haruaki left for her. She thought that leaving her alone here was impertinent but there wasn't anything she could do about
it so she just ate the breakfast/lunch that Haruaki left for her. After the meal, Fear murmured to her self.

"..... Phew. How boring."

She was sitting at the porch and looking up at the sky. That was when the "urge" hit her. It was a refreshing experience since it was her first time, but it was kind of
embarrassing thinking about it------The call of nature.

"Being a human wasn't as comfortable as I thought."

She went to the washroom, making a face. After a few moments, her mission was completed.

"Now that was convenient. Haruaki said that it was called a faucet. I was quite amazed."

Fear stood before the wash stand, washing her hands and thinking about the great changes of the world around her. She mastered the use of faucet. Though she was amazed
sometimes at the technology, she taught that it was not enough to make her afraid.
While she was shaking the water off her hands, something inside the room caught her eye.

"Hm. I know that machine. It's called a "Washing machine". You put water and detergent to it and it will wash the clothes automatically."

Fear remembered what Haruaki said last night. She had to do something that [people would be thankful for] in order to lift her curse. Now, she thought about her current
condition. She had nothing to do. Maybe she should start doing something that would be helpful for people. Haruaki also said that it would take a lot of time to lift the
curse. If so, she should start early to finish earlier than it will originally take.

"....Hehehe. Thank me for what I'm going to do. And marvel at my true capacity...!"

First of all, she grabbed the clothes in the laundry basket and put them inside the washing machine. Next, she searched for a box of laundry detergent and found a box of powder
besides the washing machine. She tried to smell and it smelled like soap. She thought with confidence that this was the laundry detergent. Finally, she put the detergent inside
the washing machine-----one whole box of it. After the procedure, she tried to push different buttons and saw that the machine started to operate.

"I can do this...hehehe. I'm amazed by my adaptation ability. Well, maybe I should clean the house next!"

The thing that she needed was called a vacuum cleaner. According to Haruaki, it was a box with long nose attached to it. She found the vacuum cleaner inside the closet.

"I know too that this machine requires electricity. There should be a nose-like hole on the walls. Hm, this should be it. It does look like a nose hole. But, hmmmm this
fork at the back of the vaccuum machine won't reach those holes......Wha?!"

The cord extended as she played with the plug. She was surprised by the unexpected movement.
She coughed, held her head high, and looked at her left and right.

"......It was just a feint. I knew about that."

She inserted the plug into the consent and tried to push all the buttons of the vacuum cleaner. It revved up and started to suck in dust. Perfect.
Fear slowly moved the vacuum and cleaned the whole room. She started to enjoy using the vacuum, so she proceeded on cleaning anywhere that she pleased.
She gradually got used to it and became faster as she cleaned. Though, there were some unknown phenomenon where the cord became heavier and crashing sounds resounded
behind her. Fear tried to look back but something more important entered her sight. It was a black eight-legged insect that was crawling above the tatami.

"A s-spider?!"

Goosebumps rose all over her. Fear asked herself why did it have to appear in front of her.
She vilificated her luck and tried to run away but she quickly turned back in self denial, thinking that she shouldn't back off against a spider.
Grabbing the vacuum cleaner, Fear rushed to the spider. The machine she was holding wasn't a convenient vacuum cleaner anymore. It was an advanced weapon that could
send that wretched spider into another dimension.

"Turn into ash with the power of electricity!"

The spider quickly changed its direction and was able to evade the attack. It went inside the open closet where the vacuum cleaner was placed.
Fear couldn't hold back so she inserted the vacuum inside the closet and tried to suck in the spider. The vacuum hit other things inside the closet while
fear was maneuvering it. They came crashing out of the closet.
The vacuum must have sucked in something big since the vacum suddenly stopped working after raising a weird sound.

"What the?!"

She was the one attacking a while ago but now the table was turned against her. She backed a few steps and quickly shut the closet door. She sat down, let out a sigh and
thought of letting go of the closet door.
What should I do? Should I attack again? No, there's no need. he won't be able to get out unless I open this door. That's right, I'll just keep it shut. I'll just have
Haruaki terminate it when he comes home.

"I didn't see anything..... Yes, that's how it is."

Fear saw an object familiar to her rolling near her feet. It must have come from the closet. It was a cube in a size where one could hold it in their palm, having a surface of
3x3 tiles. Every tile was painted with different colors.
She slanted her head and tried moving the cube. The colored tile shifted. She thought that if the tiles are moved right, the color on surface of the cube would be uniform.

"...... ...... ...... Oh! I forgot that there are things that I should be doing right now."

Fear placed the cube back on the floor. That moment, she heard a buzzing sound coming from the washing machine. She remembered that she was washing clothes.

"....Well, it certainly is showy. I wonder if it was necessary to do that much."

Bubbles were bursting out from the washing machine like a mountain. Not only that, the overflowing water made a pool on the floor.
Anyway, if there are washed clothes then they must be hung to let them dry.
Fear rescued the washed clothes out of the washing machine and placed them in a basket. She got out into the garden and went to the drying pole. The garden was carpeted
with green grass and it felt good to her bare feet.
Fear stood before the drying pole, wrung the clothes and set them on the pole to dry. There were triangular beak-like things on the pole but she didn't know what its used for
so she put them away. Maybe it was a charm or something.

"This is the last....one. Phew. It's perfect."

The clothes waved like a flag. Thinking that she was the one who did it caused a strange sense of fulfillment course through her.

It came when she tried to turn back, confident about her victorious feat-----A gust of wind.

There was no way she could go after it, and the towel went up over the roof. She made a wry face and jumped high onto the roof.
She heard a sound of something breaking below her but the towel was more important at that moment. She collected the towel and jumped down to the ground.
At that moment, another gust of wind came, as if it was playing a prank against her. Because of this, some of the clothes flew high up onto the branch of a tall tree.
She clucked and placed the collected towel on the pole. The moment she let go of the towel, the gust carried it up again, on to the tree branch. Damn. It was endless.

"..... Er, well. Clothes will dry faster if there was a wind to dry it. That means that those clothes over there on branch will dry faster. When viewed from a broad
perspective, it was better that it went up there on the tree.... or at least, I think that way."

She forcefully convinced herself and turned back to the house's direction, trying not to look at the waving clothes on the tree
a strange thing came into her view. And it was....

First, there was the living room. The cabinets were turned over and the table on the center was slanted into a weird position. Its foot pierced through the sliding door.
The cord constricted around the table. She didn't notice because of the appearance of the spider and the cubic toy. Somehow, she thought she knew what that caused weird phenomenon earlier.
Adding to that, many things which came from the closet were scattered on the floor and the vacuum cleaner was lying dead on the floor.
Fear also noticed that something fell from the roof and saw that it was a gray-colored roof tile. It must have been the breaking sound she heard when she jumped over to the roof.

It was the first time that fear thought that something was strange. It seemed that the house became disarranged, more than before she started cleaning. In fact, she had a
feeling that it was completely wretched. She wondered why.

"Could it be that I have done something wrong?"

Two people's footsteps answered her question.
Fear slowly went over the porch and laid on her stomach, thinking.
A poltergeist or an alien. Which would be more credible if she were to reason out?

<center>* * *</center>

"Hmmmmmmmmm. I have this feeling that what she tried to do was too predictable but, could it be really...?"

Haruaki murmured to himself while looking up at the laundered clothes swaying on the branches of the tree located in the garden.

"If she was just playing around, she wouldn't think to put laundry detergent into the washing machine.... Except for the amount she put in it. If you go to the washing machine
right now, you'll see for yourself that it's throwing out bubbles like a crab."

Konoha raised her hands and formed a "scissors", trying to imitate a crab. Haruaki picked up the Rubik's cube that was laying on the floor.

"Really. Where did she find this thing?"

"Um, Haruaki-kun...? Do you remember the time when I first came here?"

"I can't remember much of the details, but I do. You did some strange things back then."

She came to this house when Haruaki was about to enter grade school. Of course, he didn't remember the clear details but he could still remember Konoha's impression.

"I thought so. Well, I wanted you to forget all about it at first but thinking about it it now, I'm glad that you still remember how I used to be."

"Why?"

"Hehe. You just have to tell Fear-san what you told me back when we first met. With that, I bet all the problems will be solved."

"I don't remember what I told you. What did I say back then?"

"Well, Haruaki-kun didn't change a bit so you just have to tell her what's on your mind right now."

After that, Konoha offered to help cleaning up the house but Haruaki politely refused. He felt that it was something he had to do, and not anyone else. Konoha didn't argue
with him.
Later, after Konoha went back to the outer building, Haruaki left the Rubik's cube on the table and looked up at the ceiling.

"Oh hell. What am I supposed to do...."

In that evening.

"Hey. Are you awake?"

He waited patiently for the answer. After few moments, it came to him.

"Shut up. I'm asleep."

"No you're not. You answered my question."

"Shut up and be silent if you don't wanna be cursed."

"Alright, alright. So, don't you have something to say?"

After an interlude of silence, Fear replied that she didn't have anything to say to him. Haruaki said never mind and sighed. Talk about being stubborn.

"You might not have anything to say to me, but I do. Well, er... I'm sorry."

There was no reply. There wasn't anything he could do for her silence so he just continued speaking.

"I already knew what I should have done, but I forgot. You look like a human but you aren't-----but in reality, you're a human so you might have some difficulties at first. There might
be things that you wouldn't understand, and there might be times where you bother other people. There also might be times where you have a quarrel with someone. Konoha also
went through all of that."

"I'm not sure what you're talking about but don't compare me to that cowtits. It's unpleasant."

"Yeah, okay. Well, what I want to say is... that you don't have to hurry trying to lift your curse. And, if there is something that you don't know, just ask me and I'll teach you
so long as it is something that I know. I left your dinner at the kitchen so you can have it when you get hungry. I'll be going now. Oh, I forgot, here's my present for you.
Take it."

Haruaki left the paper bag he was carrying onto the floor in front of the sliding door. After that, he went back to his room, yawning as he walked away.
After a few minutes, the sliding door silently opened. After some minutes of observation, a white hand came out and took the paper bag. The sliding door moved silently as the
sliding door closed.

Inside the paper bag was some clothes. They were kind of big but most of them were universally fitting one pieces. There was also new underwear that was wrapped in a plastic.
A note fell from it saying "Only underwear should be brand new for infants"....

"Drop dead!"

Fear threw the note on the floor by reflex. She noticed that behind the paper was another note addressed to her. It said, "If you want a bra, try to work part-time and buy it yourself. You'll be able to do so when you get used to living here..... Well, we're cursed tools so our bodies won't grow. That means that there won't be a need to, I mean, it would
be just a waste of time if you...."

A heel drop struck the paper before Fear could finish reading.
There were other things inside the paper bag other than the clothes. It was the cubic toy from earlier. And, there was also...

"....a rice cracker."

Her stomach growled. Haruaki said that she ate all the stock so he must have bought it for her.

"H-Hmph. I won't be bribed that easily. Does he think I'm such a child that I'll fall to his scheme?"

Despite her muttered complaints, her hands opened the snack and dug-in to the treat. Her other hand played with the Rubik's cube. Sound of creaking plastic filled the room.

"Hm. Sesame seeds. It's coated with sesame seeds. How fragrant..."

Fear thought about Haruaki while two sounds resounded inside her room.
Well, I'll forgive that shameless brat for now. He should thank my merciful heart. First things first-----I should ask him where this wonderful snack is being sold.

<noinclude>
{| border="1" cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 1em 1em 0; background: #f9f9f9; border: 1px #aaaaaa solid; padding: 0.2em; border-collapse: collapse;"
|-
| Back to [[CubexCursedxCurious:Volume1_Prologue|Prologue]]
| Return to [[CubexCursedxCurious|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[CubexCursedxCurious:Volume1_Chapter2|Chapter 2]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

CubexCursedxCurious:Volume1 Prologue

2009-03-15T03:18:49Z

OceanBlue: Tried to edit as little as possible while leaving the style intact, but....

I. A tool changes its quality into negative direction if it continues to receive negative thoughts.

II. A tool that receives negative thoughts often affects the owner and the people around it.

III. In exchange for the negative effect it brings upon the people around it, it may show mysterious charm and function.

IV. At the end of receiving all the negative thoughts and curses from humans, it will obtain human qualities.

===Prologue===

A black cube.

It was the only way to describe it when you looked at it.
One side was about 1 meter long, and there was no hint as to the object's use.

Yachi Haruaki stared at it with an obvious look of disbelief on his face.

"Excuse me, sir, could I have your signature?"

"Oh, yes, sure."

Haruaki checked the receipt.
It was written in English since it was sent from abroad, but the name written for the sender was just as he expected.

''Another one of THOSE, you stupid old man?!'' Haruaki groaned silently to himself.

"Thank you, sir! Phew, I've had a hard time carrying this. It was so heavy! Well, may I ask what this thing is, sir?"

"Er, you see, my father loves to collect antique objects, so he sends some that he bought while abroad every once in a while... Hmmm... I also wonder what this is!"

Haruaki tried to evade the question.
It was no lie though.
It was just that he wasn't sure how weird this particular object that his father had sent to him this time was.
Of course, he didn't bother explaining that to the delivery man.

After the delivery man had driven away, Haruaki looked down again at the strange box lying in front of his gate.

"What is this, really? Well, it was my old man who sent it, so it's got to be something troublesome for sure."

The important question was to what degree will it be troubling?
Haruaki cautiously touched the cube, feeling the cold sensation of the steel.
It had no lid, so he supposed that it was a boxed-shaped "something", rather than a box to put "something" in.
He examined the surface closely and noticed that there were numerous lines and curves that hinted a joint seam.

"Is it some kind of puzzle box? Maybe it has to undergo a certain process to activate or something...? Hmmmm, maybe I'm just thinking too much. I suppose these kind of things are the ones that don't have a specific use, now that I think about it. I've made up my mind! It's nothing important, I'm sure. My peaceful life will go on just as it was..."

Haruaki told himself this as he played with the seams.
He thought he heard a surprised wail.
He stopped moving and closed his eyes.
After he calmed down he told himself,

"...That was an auditory hallucination."

While he was trying to convince himself, the cube let out a sound of grazing steel, and a part of its surface moved.
Haruaki peeked at the space visible from the part of the cube that looked like a popped-out CD tray.
He saw metal parts with different shapes that looked like cogs entangled inside.
He tried to trace it with his finger but all did it was move.
Nothing had happened except for the low moan that he thought he heard.

"Oh, another auditory hallucination! That's it, uh-huh. Well, it's none of my business anyway! Since it has nothing to do with me, the best thing to do is to leave it alone!"

He chose not to question this for the moment.
But still, it would be bad if he left the cube at the front of his gate, so he brought it to the room where the other objects that his father sent were being stored.

"Oh... God...! It's so damn heavy!"

He started to walk toward the main building of his house.
On his way, he thought heard a dissatisfied snort but, of course, he decided it was another one of those auditory hallucinations.

Haruaki woke up inside his 6-[[CubexCursedxCurious:Volume1_Translation_Notes#Tatami_Mat|tatami]] Japanese room.
He hurriedly checked the clock and saw that it was already past 7:00 PM.
It was already dark outside the window. He only planned to take a nap after carrying the black cube to the storage room, but ended up sleeping until now.
Maybe it was because he wasn't able to sleep well last night.

''Oh hell, my stomach's already complaining in hunger, but I still haven't made anything to eat...''

He did have a housemate living in a separate building, but he was usually alone, so it was unlikely that he'd find a cooked meal.
Besides, the package that his father sent came right after he came home from school, so he hadn't had the chance to prepare something to eat.
Haruaki got out of the bed and was thinking about the chores he was going to do when he heard faint sounds.
The sound of someone's footsteps, the sound of someone scavenging inside the cabinet, and finally, an unknown crunching sound.

''Could it be... Konoha?''

Haruaki looked out the window and checked the second floor of the other building.
There were two windows and one of them had lights on.
That meant that his housemate was there.

[[Image:C3 01-015.jpg|thumb]]
His whole body tensed.
This traditional Japanese house was old and wide.
It was an excellent prey for burglars.
Haruaki opened the sliding door and walked silently down the hallway.
The sound came from the kitchen.
He held his breath and silently walked towards the kitchen, feeling like a burglar himself.

The moonlight illuminated a small figure crouching in front of the cabinet.
It also reflected long silver hair.
Observing its shadow, Haruaki decided that the figure was female.
Her hand was alternating from her mouth to the plastic bag she was holding.
The unknown crunching sound was coming from there.
His calm observation ended when he realized the amazing view in front of him.
Without a thought, he pointed his finger at the female figure and shouted,

"A naked rice cracker thief?!"

"Huh?"

The girl stared back at Haruaki.
She had long silver hair and fair white skin, with a slender body and a beautiful face.
It was shrouded with grace and strong will, with contradicting qualities playing in her expression like trick art.
A fragment of a rice cracker in her mouth fell as she also pointed her finger towards Haruaki and shouted,

"Wha..?! Hey! You're that impudent man from earlier!"

The girl looked down at her body and a shade of red spread across her face.

"Don't tell me you're planning to play with my body again?! What a shameless man!"

She knelt down and started to throw every object that was within her grasp: a tray, a wooden plate, a teapot, among other things.
She did it with great control.
Haruaki slipped on the object that he had accidentally stepped on while trying to parry the flying projectiles.
Objects started to pile above him.

"Ouch! H-hold on for a second! Ow! If you come near me, I'll..."

The girl crossed her arms in front of her conservative breasts, her hands still holding the round-shaped rice crackers.
Haruaki lost his voice as he froze up from seeing the unpredictable expression on her face.
The girl tensed up for a moment and shouted at him,

"...I, I'll put a curse on you!"

Haruaki understood from the words she said that SHE was the box that he received this afternoon.
Tension left his shoulders and he dropped them as he thought,

''I knew it. That stupid old man... He did it again.''

''He sent another Cursed Tool again!''

<noinclude>
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|-
| Back to [[CubexCursedxCurious:Volume1_Illustrations|Illustrations]]
| Return to [[CubexCursedxCurious|Main Page]]
| Forward to [[CubexCursedxCurious:Volume1_Chapter1|Chapter 1]]
|-
|}
</noinclude>

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-08-21T01:57:24Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0055, <Translator asked for a TL check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 09:24, 24 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
***Changed to, <"In the middle of this, Fuuko's carving is the only noise I can hear."> Original: "In the middle of that, the only noise I can her is that of Fuuko carving." --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 09:24, 24 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
***Changed to, <It does seem they are improving. Their shapes aren't bad.>. Pluralized the second sentence to agree with the first.
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
***Replaced 'be' with 'mean'. --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 09:24, 24 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <Asterisk'ed.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0397, <'Could' is the past tense of 'can'. Should 'could' be replaced with 'can'? It doesn't sound right, but....> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:55, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1503]]
**Line 0006, <'Round and round' is an uncommon expression. 'Around' is more common.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0018, <Is "aren't I good" slang? Rearranged, it makes, "I aren't good?" I can't think of a better replacement, though.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0022, <Alt. and original translations mean different things.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <'Obvious' doesn't fit, because 'obvious' and 'new' aren't related.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <Poorly worded. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <'Should have been' or 'should be'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <'Around' is implied in this sentence and is unneeded.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0484, <Would 'treating' be a better replacement with 'how to treat'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1504]]
**Line 0072, <Can this be phrased better? The second part is unclear.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0075, <Can 'vacation' be taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0092, <This is phrased awkwardly.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <"How painful the days" is missing a verb.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1505]]
**Line 0073, <'Advocating' doesn't seem right. [advocate: To speak, plead, or argue in favor of. See Synonyms at support. | thefreedictionary.com]> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What's a 'demihuman'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0098, <Either change 'be,' to 'be?' or replace with alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1506]]
**Line 0092, <Can this be rephrased so it doesn't have 'such that'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <Is this 'any more uneasy' or 'uneasy anymore'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1507]]
**Line 0018, <This line seems odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <What's 'Peering out his eyes' mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0114, <'turned on'? Is this really the right phrase?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1511]]
**Line 0101, <Would Tomoya say that, or would Fuuko say that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0105, <This doesn't really make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0183, <Are this and 0184 supposed to coordinate with 0101?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0218, <Is 'bad' correct? It's followed by 'late', so...> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0276, <Cutting?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0362, <Sentence is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <Are the pronouns like this in the Japanese version? Too many "she"s.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0469, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0585, <Is he saying, 'I had never thought of any of my teachers as beautiful.' or 'I didn't have any beautiful teachers.'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <What does the tip of her nose have to do with her breathing?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0676, <'Take care of her' followed by 'Not at all'.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0692, <Same as 0676.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <Odd phrasing. I don't understand it enough to rephrase it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1513]]
**Line 0012, <Odd phrasing. I can't understand what it's saying, so I can't rephrase it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1515]]
**Line 0081, <The first clause is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:12, 21 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0161, <This is phrased oddly. 'Crossed by'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:12, 21 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1516]]
**Line 0001, <The line seems like it's saying the wedding is that day.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:44, 21 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0224, <'Gah' doesn't seem to fit.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:44, 21 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4415]]
**Line 0107, <He already knew he was skipping class, so wouldn't it be, "remember"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:57, 28 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]]
**Line 0188, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:57, 20 August 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-29T02:57:20Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-24T16:24:31Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

User talk:OceanBlue

2008-07-23T01:54:45Z

OceanBlue:

I guess I'll start recording Clannad edits. I'll probably miscount the number of lines edited a lot.
I need someone to translation check [[Clannad:SEEN1518]].

==July 20, 2008. Sunday==

Total number of edits: 9
Total number of SEENs edited: 8
Total number of lines edited: 139
----
*[[Clannad:SEEN1504]]
**Lines edited: 14
**Character difference: -37
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1505]]
**Lines edited: 20
**Character difference: -9
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1506]]
**Lines edited: 27
**Character difference: -20
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1507]]
**Lines edited: 44
**Comments added/changed: 12
**Character difference: +562
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN2417]]
**Lines edited: 3
**Character difference: -4
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: ellipsis on lines 37 and 316 expanded to three periods, dashes on line 111 changed (rlc chokes on it otherwise)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2417]]
**Lines edited: 24
**Comments added/changed: 9
**Character difference: +403
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: 0147, 0170, 0181, 0194, 0215, 0219, 0223, 0226, 0236, 0247, 0278, 0285, 0297, 0304, 0307, 0312, 0315, 0316, 0319, 0323, 0335, 0337, 0338 minor reword
*[[Clannad:SEEN2425]]
**Lines edited: 4
**Comments added/changed: 7
**Character difference: +64
**Editor: Kinny Riddle
*[[Clannad:SEEN3417]]
**Lines edited: 2
**Character difference: -5
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits: 0149, 0203
*[[Clannad:SEEN3429]]
**Lines edited: 1
**Character difference: -2
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edit in line 280, also removed bad char (causing rlc to choke)

==July 21, 2008. Monday==

Total number of edits: 11
Total number of SEENs edited: 9
Total number of lines edited: 206
----
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +196
**Editor: Shirohane
**Summary added: Reply to Kinny Riddle's comment, line 0122
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +260
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1508]]
**Lines edited: 7
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +72
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1511]]
**Lines edited: 109 [I probably miscounted.]
**Comments added/changed: 13
**Character difference: +868
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1512]]
**Lines edited: 9
**Comments added/changed: 4
**Character difference: +301
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1512]]
**Lines edited: 1
**Character difference: 0
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1513]]
**Lines edited: 40
**Comments added/changed: 6
**Character difference: +308
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1514]]
**Lines edited: 31
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +116
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN2417]]
**Lines edited: 1
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +203
**Editor: Shizuka
**Summary added: 0345: Yup, you're the real thing -> Genuine [consistency with 0354 and 0349]
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Lines edited: 7
**Comments added/changed: 11
**Character difference: +307
**Editor: Kinny Riddle
*[[Clannad:SEEN2428]]
**Lines edited: 1
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +3
**Editor: Kinny Riddle

==July 22, 2008. Tuesday==

Total number of edits: -
Total number of SEENs edited: -
Total number of lines edited: -
*Note: Some edits have not been recorded.
**http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Clannad:SEEN6421&curid=2208&diff=31038&oldid=29165
**http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Clannad:SEEN0421&curid=2170&diff=31039&oldid=26501
**http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Clannad:SEEN1421&curid=2180&diff=31041&oldid=29271
**http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Clannad:SEEN1001&curid=2270&diff=31043&oldid=25344
**http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Clannad:SEEN6421&curid=2208&diff=31048&oldid=31038
----

*[[Clannad:SEEN0420]]
**Lines edited: 43
**Comments added/changed: 16
**Character difference: +1,031
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits: 2, 6, 7, 9, 11, 12, 16, 18, 22, 24, 25, 27, 28, 30, 32-35, 37, 41, 46, 47, 55, 58-60, 62-64, 69-70, 72, 81, 83, 84, 86, 87
*[[Clannad:SEEN1001]]
**Lines edited:
**Comments added/changed:
**Character difference: +287
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor rewording
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Lines edited:
**Comments added/changed:
**Character difference: +851
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits
*[[Clannad:SEEN1515]]
**Lines edited: 47
**Comments added/changed: 6
**Character difference: +270
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1516]]
**Lines edited: 72
**Comments added/changed: 15
**Character difference: +765
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN3419]]
**Lines edited: 5
**Character difference: +9
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits: 0130, 0133, 0156, 0184, 0188
*[[Clannad:SEEN6418]]
**Lines edited: 9
**Comments added/changed: 3
**Character difference: +132
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: missing endquote in 0139; tense in 0164; reword 0384, 0398, 0400, 0440
*[[Clannad:SEEN6419]]
**Lines edited: 15
**Comments added/changed: 2
**Character difference: +64
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: tense in 0089; reword 0057, close quote 0104, minor reword 0203, 0263, 0309, 0320, 0325, 0326, 0332, 0360, 0362, 0393, 0419, 0449
*[[Clannad:SEEN6420]]
**Lines edited: 12
**Comments added/changed: 3
**Character difference: +176
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits: 0000, 0007, 0009, 0016, 0019, 0032, 0035, 0045, 0069, 0093, 0125
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Lines edited: [*Twitch* After counting 7100, I feel like I can't do any more....]
**Comments added/changed:
**Character difference: +4,155
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor rewordings
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Lines edited:
**Comments added/changed:
**Character difference: +237
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: cleaning up a couple of earlier edits.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6900]]
**Lines edited: 6
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +71
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits: 0182, 0190, 0197, 0212, 0222, 0237
*[[Clannad:SEEN7100]]
**Lines edited: 343 [Wow! And I probably miscounted.]
**Comments added/changed: [I'll put something here... eventually... maybe.]
**Character difference: +5,583
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: reword S-1 and S-2
*[[Clannad:SEEN7100]]
**Lines edited: 33
**Comments added/changed: 5
**Character difference: +307
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: cleaning up a couple of my edits.

User talk:OceanBlue

2008-07-23T01:52:26Z

OceanBlue: /* July 22, 2008. Tuesday */

I guess I'll start recording Clannad edits. I'll probably miscount the number of lines edited a lot.

==July 20, 2008. Sunday==

Total number of edits: 9
Total number of SEENs edited: 8
Total number of lines edited: 139
----
*[[Clannad:SEEN1504]]
**Lines edited: 14
**Character difference: -37
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1505]]
**Lines edited: 20
**Character difference: -9
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1506]]
**Lines edited: 27
**Character difference: -20
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1507]]
**Lines edited: 44
**Comments added/changed: 12
**Character difference: +562
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN2417]]
**Lines edited: 3
**Character difference: -4
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: ellipsis on lines 37 and 316 expanded to three periods, dashes on line 111 changed (rlc chokes on it otherwise)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2417]]
**Lines edited: 24
**Comments added/changed: 9
**Character difference: +403
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: 0147, 0170, 0181, 0194, 0215, 0219, 0223, 0226, 0236, 0247, 0278, 0285, 0297, 0304, 0307, 0312, 0315, 0316, 0319, 0323, 0335, 0337, 0338 minor reword
*[[Clannad:SEEN2425]]
**Lines edited: 4
**Comments added/changed: 7
**Character difference: +64
**Editor: Kinny Riddle
*[[Clannad:SEEN3417]]
**Lines edited: 2
**Character difference: -5
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits: 0149, 0203
*[[Clannad:SEEN3429]]
**Lines edited: 1
**Character difference: -2
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edit in line 280, also removed bad char (causing rlc to choke)

==July 21, 2008. Monday==

Total number of edits: 11
Total number of SEENs edited: 9
Total number of lines edited: 206
----
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +196
**Editor: Shirohane
**Summary added: Reply to Kinny Riddle's comment, line 0122
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +260
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1508]]
**Lines edited: 7
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +72
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1511]]
**Lines edited: 109 [I probably miscounted.]
**Comments added/changed: 13
**Character difference: +868
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1512]]
**Lines edited: 9
**Comments added/changed: 4
**Character difference: +301
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1512]]
**Lines edited: 1
**Character difference: 0
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1513]]
**Lines edited: 40
**Comments added/changed: 6
**Character difference: +308
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1514]]
**Lines edited: 31
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +116
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN2417]]
**Lines edited: 1
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +203
**Editor: Shizuka
**Summary added: 0345: Yup, you're the real thing -> Genuine [consistency with 0354 and 0349]
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Lines edited: 7
**Comments added/changed: 11
**Character difference: +307
**Editor: Kinny Riddle
*[[Clannad:SEEN2428]]
**Lines edited: 1
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +3
**Editor: Kinny Riddle

==July 22, 2008. Tuesday==

Total number of edits: -
Total number of SEENs edited: -
Total number of lines edited: -
*Note: Some edits have not been recorded.
**http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Clannad:SEEN6421&curid=2208&diff=31038&oldid=29165
**http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Clannad:SEEN0421&curid=2170&diff=31039&oldid=26501
**http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Clannad:SEEN1421&curid=2180&diff=31041&oldid=29271
**http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Clannad:SEEN1001&curid=2270&diff=31043&oldid=25344
**http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Clannad:SEEN6421&curid=2208&diff=31048&oldid=31038
----

*[[Clannad:SEEN0420]]
**Lines edited: 43
**Comments added/changed: 16
**Character difference: +1,031
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits: 2, 6, 7, 9, 11, 12, 16, 18, 22, 24, 25, 27, 28, 30, 32-35, 37, 41, 46, 47, 55, 58-60, 62-64, 69-70, 72, 81, 83, 84, 86, 87
*[[Clannad:SEEN1001]]
**Lines edited:
**Comments added/changed:
**Character difference: +287
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor rewording
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Lines edited:
**Comments added/changed:
**Character difference: +851
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits
*[[Clannad:SEEN1515]]
**Lines edited: 47
**Comments added/changed: 6
**Character difference: +270
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN1516]]
**Lines edited: 72
**Comments added/changed: 15
**Character difference: +765
**Editor: OceanBlue
*[[Clannad:SEEN3419]]
**Lines edited: 5
**Character difference: +9
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits: 0130, 0133, 0156, 0184, 0188
*[[Clannad:SEEN6418]]
**Lines edited: 9
**Comments added/changed: 3
**Character difference: +132
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: missing endquote in 0139; tense in 0164; reword 0384, 0398, 0400, 0440
*[[Clannad:SEEN6419]]
**Lines edited: 15
**Comments added/changed: 2
**Character difference: +64
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: tense in 0089; reword 0057, close quote 0104, minor reword 0203, 0263, 0309, 0320, 0325, 0326, 0332, 0360, 0362, 0393, 0419, 0449
*[[Clannad:SEEN6420]]
**Lines edited: 12
**Comments added/changed: 3
**Character difference: +176
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits: 0000, 0007, 0009, 0016, 0019, 0032, 0035, 0045, 0069, 0093, 0125
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Lines edited: [*Twitch* After counting 7100, I feel like I can't do any more....]
**Comments added/changed:
**Character difference: +4,155
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor rewordings
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Lines edited:
**Comments added/changed:
**Character difference: +237
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: cleaning up a couple of earlier edits.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6900]]
**Lines edited: 6
**Comments added/changed: 1
**Character difference: +71
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: minor edits: 0182, 0190, 0197, 0212, 0222, 0237
*[[Clannad:SEEN7100]]
**Lines edited: 343 [Wow! And I probably miscounted.]
**Comments added/changed: [I'll put something here... eventually... maybe.]
**Character difference: +5,583
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: reword S-1 and S-2
*[[Clannad:SEEN7100]]
**Lines edited: 33
**Comments added/changed: 5
**Character difference: +307
**Editor: Richard 23
**Summary added: cleaning up a couple of my edits.

User talk:OceanBlue

2008-07-22T04:00:10Z

OceanBlue: /* July 22, 2008. Tuesday */

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-22T03:44:50Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0397, <'Could' is the past tense of 'can'. Should 'could' be replaced with 'can'? It doesn't sound right, but....> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:55, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1503]]
**Line 0006, <'Round and round' is an uncommon expression. 'Around' is more common.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0018, <Is "aren't I good" slang? Rearranged, it makes, "I aren't good?" I can't think of a better replacement, though.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0022, <Alt. and original translations mean different things.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <'Obvious' doesn't fit, because 'obvious' and 'new' aren't related.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <Poorly worded. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <'Should have been' or 'should be'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <'Around' is implied in this sentence and is unneeded.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0484, <Would 'treating' be a better replacement with 'how to treat'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1504]]
**Line 0072, <Can this be phrased better? The second part is unclear.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0075, <Can 'vacation' be taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0092, <This is phrased awkwardly.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <"How painful the days" is missing a verb.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1505]]
**Line 0073, <'Advocating' doesn't seem right. [advocate: To speak, plead, or argue in favor of. See Synonyms at support. | thefreedictionary.com]> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What's a 'demihuman'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0098, <Either change 'be,' to 'be?' or replace with alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1506]]
**Line 0092, <Can this be rephrased so it doesn't have 'such that'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <Is this 'any more uneasy' or 'uneasy anymore'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1507]]
**Line 0018, <This line seems odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <What's 'Peering out his eyes' mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0114, <'turned on'? Is this really the right phrase?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1511]]
**Line 0101, <Would Tomoya say that, or would Fuuko say that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0105, <This doesn't really make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0183, <Are this and 0184 supposed to coordinate with 0101?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0218, <Is 'bad' correct? It's followed by 'late', so...> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0276, <Cutting?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0362, <Sentence is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <Are the pronouns like this in the Japanese version? Too many "she"s.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0469, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0585, <Is he saying, 'I had never thought of any of my teachers as beautiful.' or 'I didn't have any beautiful teachers.'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <What does the tip of her nose have to do with her breathing?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0676, <'Take care of her' followed by 'Not at all'.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0692, <Same as 0676.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <Odd phrasing. I don't understand it enough to rephrase it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1513]]
**Line 0012, <Odd phrasing. I can't understand what it's saying, so I can't rephrase it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1515]]
**Line 0081, <The first clause is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:12, 21 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0161, <This is phrased oddly. 'Crossed by'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:12, 21 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1516]]
**Line 0001, <The line seems like it's saying the wedding is that day.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:44, 21 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0224, <'Gah' doesn't seem to fit.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:44, 21 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-22T03:12:35Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0397, <'Could' is the past tense of 'can'. Should 'could' be replaced with 'can'? It doesn't sound right, but....> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:55, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1503]]
**Line 0006, <'Round and round' is an uncommon expression. 'Around' is more common.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0018, <Is "aren't I good" slang? Rearranged, it makes, "I aren't good?" I can't think of a better replacement, though.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0022, <Alt. and original translations mean different things.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <'Obvious' doesn't fit, because 'obvious' and 'new' aren't related.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <Poorly worded. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <'Should have been' or 'should be'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <'Around' is implied in this sentence and is unneeded.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0484, <Would 'treating' be a better replacement with 'how to treat'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1504]]
**Line 0072, <Can this be phrased better? The second part is unclear.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0075, <Can 'vacation' be taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0092, <This is phrased awkwardly.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <"How painful the days" is missing a verb.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1505]]
**Line 0073, <'Advocating' doesn't seem right. [advocate: To speak, plead, or argue in favor of. See Synonyms at support. | thefreedictionary.com]> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What's a 'demihuman'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0098, <Either change 'be,' to 'be?' or replace with alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1506]]
**Line 0092, <Can this be rephrased so it doesn't have 'such that'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <Is this 'any more uneasy' or 'uneasy anymore'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1507]]
**Line 0018, <This line seems odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <What's 'Peering out his eyes' mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0114, <'turned on'? Is this really the right phrase?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1511]]
**Line 0101, <Would Tomoya say that, or would Fuuko say that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0105, <This doesn't really make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0183, <Are this and 0184 supposed to coordinate with 0101?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0218, <Is 'bad' correct? It's followed by 'late', so...> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0276, <Cutting?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0362, <Sentence is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <Are the pronouns like this in the Japanese version? Too many "she"s.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0469, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0585, <Is he saying, 'I had never thought of any of my teachers as beautiful.' or 'I didn't have any beautiful teachers.'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <What does the tip of her nose have to do with her breathing?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0676, <'Take care of her' followed by 'Not at all'.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0692, <Same as 0676.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <Odd phrasing. I don't understand it enough to rephrase it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1513]]
**Line 0012, <Odd phrasing. I can't understand what it's saying, so I can't rephrase it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1515]]
**Line 0081, <The first clause is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:12, 21 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0161, <This is phrased oddly. 'Crossed by'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:12, 21 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

User talk:OceanBlue

2008-07-22T02:54:01Z

OceanBlue:

User talk:OceanBlue

2008-07-22T02:51:29Z

OceanBlue: /* July 21, 2008. Monday */

User talk:OceanBlue

2008-07-21T04:04:59Z

OceanBlue: /* July 21, 2008. Monday */

User talk:OceanBlue

2008-07-21T03:47:19Z

OceanBlue:

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-21T02:58:39Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0397, <'Could' is the past tense of 'can'. Should 'could' be replaced with 'can'? It doesn't sound right, but....> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:55, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1503]]
**Line 0006, <'Round and round' is an uncommon expression. 'Around' is more common.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0018, <Is "aren't I good" slang? Rearranged, it makes, "I aren't good?" I can't think of a better replacement, though.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0022, <Alt. and original translations mean different things.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <'Obvious' doesn't fit, because 'obvious' and 'new' aren't related.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <Poorly worded. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <'Should have been' or 'should be'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <'Around' is implied in this sentence and is unneeded.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0484, <Would 'treating' be a better replacement with 'how to treat'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1504]]
**Line 0072, <Can this be phrased better? The second part is unclear.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0075, <Can 'vacation' be taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0092, <This is phrased awkwardly.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <"How painful the days" is missing a verb.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1505]]
**Line 0073, <'Advocating' doesn't seem right. [advocate: To speak, plead, or argue in favor of. See Synonyms at support. | thefreedictionary.com]> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What's a 'demihuman'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0098, <Either change 'be,' to 'be?' or replace with alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1506]]
**Line 0092, <Can this be rephrased so it doesn't have 'such that'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <Is this 'any more uneasy' or 'uneasy anymore'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1507]]
**Line 0018, <This line seems odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <What's 'Peering out his eyes' mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0114, <'turned on'? Is this really the right phrase?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1511]]
**Line 0101, <Would Tomoya say that, or would Fuuko say that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0105, <This doesn't really make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0183, <Are this and 0184 supposed to coordinate with 0101?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0218, <Is 'bad' correct? It's followed by 'late', so...> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0276, <Cutting?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0362, <Sentence is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <Are the pronouns like this in the Japanese version? Too many "she"s.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0469, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0585, <Is he saying, 'I had never thought of any of my teachers as beautiful.' or 'I didn't have any beautiful teachers.'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <What does the tip of her nose have to do with her breathing?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0676, <'Take care of her' followed by 'Not at all'.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0692, <Same as 0676.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <Odd phrasing. I don't understand it enough to rephrase it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1513]]
**Line 0012, <Odd phrasing. I can't understand what it's saying, so I can't rephrase it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-21T01:19:06Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0397, <'Could' is the past tense of 'can'. Should 'could' be replaced with 'can'? It doesn't sound right, but....> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:55, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1503]]
**Line 0006, <'Round and round' is an uncommon expression. 'Around' is more common.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0018, <Is "aren't I good" slang? Rearranged, it makes, "I aren't good?" I can't think of a better replacement, though.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0022, <Alt. and original translations mean different things.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <'Obvious' doesn't fit, because 'obvious' and 'new' aren't related.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <Poorly worded. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <'Should have been' or 'should be'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <'Around' is implied in this sentence and is unneeded.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0484, <Would 'treating' be a better replacement with 'how to treat'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1504]]
**Line 0072, <Can this be phrased better? The second part is unclear.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0075, <Can 'vacation' be taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0092, <This is phrased awkwardly.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <"How painful the days" is missing a verb.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1505]]
**Line 0073, <'Advocating' doesn't seem right. [advocate: To speak, plead, or argue in favor of. See Synonyms at support. | thefreedictionary.com]> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What's a 'demihuman'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0098, <Either change 'be,' to 'be?' or replace with alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1506]]
**Line 0092, <Can this be rephrased so it doesn't have 'such that'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <Is this 'any more uneasy' or 'uneasy anymore'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1507]]
**Line 0018, <This line seems odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <What's 'Peering out his eyes' mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0114, <'turned on'? Is this really the right phrase?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1511]]
**Line 0101, <Would Tomoya say that, or would Fuuko say that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0105, <This doesn't really make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0183, <Are this and 0184 supposed to coordinate with 0101?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0218, <Is 'bad' correct? It's followed by 'late', so...> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0276, <Cutting?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0362, <Sentence is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <Are the pronouns like this in the Japanese version? Too many "she"s.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0469, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0585, <Is he saying, 'I had never thought of any of my teachers as beautiful.' or 'I didn't have any beautiful teachers.'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <What does the tip of her nose have to do with her breathing?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0676, <'Take care of her' followed by 'Not at all'.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0692, <Same as 0676.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <Odd phrasing. I don't understand it enough to rephrase it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:19, 20 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-20T23:58:21Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0397, <'Could' is the past tense of 'can'. Should 'could' be replaced with 'can'? It doesn't sound right, but....> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:55, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1503]]
**Line 0006, <'Round and round' is an uncommon expression. 'Around' is more common.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0018, <Is "aren't I good" slang? Rearranged, it makes, "I aren't good?" I can't think of a better replacement, though.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0022, <Alt. and original translations mean different things.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <'Obvious' doesn't fit, because 'obvious' and 'new' aren't related.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <Poorly worded. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <'Should have been' or 'should be'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <'Around' is implied in this sentence and is unneeded.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0484, <Would 'treating' be a better replacement with 'how to treat'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1504]]
**Line 0072, <Can this be phrased better? The second part is unclear.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0075, <Can 'vacation' be taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0092, <This is phrased awkwardly.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <"How painful the days" is missing a verb.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1505]]
**Line 0073, <'Advocating' doesn't seem right. [advocate: To speak, plead, or argue in favor of. See Synonyms at support. | thefreedictionary.com]> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What's a 'demihuman'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0098, <Either change 'be,' to 'be?' or replace with alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1506]]
**Line 0092, <Can this be rephrased so it doesn't have 'such that'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <Is this 'any more uneasy' or 'uneasy anymore'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1507]]
**Line 0018, <This line seems odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <What's 'Peering out his eyes' mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0114, <'turned on'? Is this really the right phrase?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:58, 20 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-20T03:38:05Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0397, <'Could' is the past tense of 'can'. Should 'could' be replaced with 'can'? It doesn't sound right, but....> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:55, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1503]]
**Line 0006, <'Round and round' is an uncommon expression. 'Around' is more common.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0018, <Is "aren't I good" slang? Rearranged, it makes, "I aren't good?" I can't think of a better replacement, though.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0022, <Alt. and original translations mean different things.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <'Obvious' doesn't fit, because 'obvious' and 'new' aren't related.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <Poorly worded. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <'Should have been' or 'should be'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <'Around' is implied in this sentence and is unneeded.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0484, <Would 'treating' be a better replacement with 'how to treat'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1504]]
**Line 0072, <Can this be phrased better? The second part is unclear.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0075, <Can 'vacation' be taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0092, <This is phrased awkwardly.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <"How painful the days" is missing a verb.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:1505]]
**Line 0073, <'Advocating' doesn't seem right. [advocate: To speak, plead, or argue in favor of. See Synonyms at support. | thefreedictionary.com]> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What's a 'demihuman'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0098, <Either change 'be,' to 'be?' or replace with alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:1506]]
**Line 0092, <Can this be rephrased so it doesn't have 'such that'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <Is this 'any more uneasy' or 'uneasy anymore'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:38, 19 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-20T03:02:49Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0397, <'Could' is the past tense of 'can'. Should 'could' be replaced with 'can'? It doesn't sound right, but....> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:55, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1503]]
**Line 0006, <'Round and round' is an uncommon expression. 'Around' is more common.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0018, <Is "aren't I good" slang? Rearranged, it makes, "I aren't good?" I can't think of a better replacement, though.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0022, <Alt. and original translations mean different things.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <'Obvious' doesn't fit, because 'obvious' and 'new' aren't related.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <Poorly worded. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <'Should have been' or 'should be'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <'Around' is implied in this sentence and is unneeded.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0484, <Would 'treating' be a better replacement with 'how to treat'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1504]]
**Line 0072, <Can this be phrased better? The second part is unclear.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0075, <Can 'vacation' be taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0092, <This is phrased awkwardly.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <"How painful the days" is missing a verb.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:1505]]
**Line 0073, <'Advocating' doesn't seem right. [advocate: To speak, plead, or argue in favor of. See Synonyms at support. | thefreedictionary.com]> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What's a 'demihuman'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0098, <Either change 'be,' to 'be?' or replace with alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:02, 19 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-20T02:48:03Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0397, <'Could' is the past tense of 'can'. Should 'could' be replaced with 'can'? It doesn't sound right, but....> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:55, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1503]]
**Line 0006, <'Round and round' is an uncommon expression. 'Around' is more common.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0018, <Is "aren't I good" slang? Rearranged, it makes, "I aren't good?" I can't think of a better replacement, though.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0022, <Alt. and original translations mean different things.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <'Obvious' doesn't fit, because 'obvious' and 'new' aren't related.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <Poorly worded. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <'Should have been' or 'should be'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <'Around' is implied in this sentence and is unneeded.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0484, <Would 'treating' be a better replacement with 'how to treat'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1504]]
**Line 0072, <Can this be phrased better? The second part is unclear.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0075, <Can 'vacation' be taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0092, <This is phrased awkwardly.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <"How painful the days" is missing a verb.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:48, 19 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-17T19:55:19Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0397, <'Could' is the past tense of 'can'. Should 'could' be replaced with 'can'? It doesn't sound right, but....> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:55, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1503]]
**Line 0006, <'Round and round' is an uncommon expression. 'Around' is more common.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0018, <Is "aren't I good" slang? Rearranged, it makes, "I aren't good?" I can't think of a better replacement, though.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0022, <Alt. and original translations mean different things.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <'Obvious' doesn't fit, because 'obvious' and 'new' aren't related.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <Poorly worded. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <'Should have been' or 'should be'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <'Around' is implied in this sentence and is unneeded.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0484, <Would 'treating' be a better replacement with 'how to treat'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-17T19:45:23Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1503]]
**Line 0006, <'Round and round' is an uncommon expression. 'Around' is more common.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0018, <Is "aren't I good" slang? Rearranged, it makes, "I aren't good?" I can't think of a better replacement, though.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0022, <Alt. and original translations mean different things.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0070, <'Obvious' doesn't fit, because 'obvious' and 'new' aren't related.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0108, <Poorly worded. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <'Should have been' or 'should be'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0132, <'Around' is implied in this sentence and is unneeded.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0484, <Would 'treating' be a better replacement with 'how to treat'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:45, 17 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Talk:Clannad

2008-07-17T18:57:48Z

OceanBlue:

== Spreadsheets ==
I made some adjustments to the section of content availability as well as submission formats. The proper name for .ods files is "OpenDocument Format (ODF) spreadsheets" because the standard is a wide-open standard, ISO/IEC 26300, which can be implemented by absolutely anyone without royalties due, including by Microsoft (which they are very grudgingly trying to implement as a second-class format; go hit [http://www.groklaw.net Groklaw]for more details). Packages which can use ODF files include OpenOffice.org (rather than "OpenOffice" which could run afoul with Microsoft's "Office" trademark), KOffice's KSpread, and Sun Microsystem's StarOffice.

-- [[User:IRJustman|IRJustman]]

The spreadsheet format has been dropped for the sake of using wikitext for versioning.

-- [[User:Velocity7|velocity7]]

After talking with Velocity7, I've taken up the menu work. When the translations to the menus are complete, please email them to me, so I can reinsert them.

-- [[User:RaptorFB|RaptorFB]]

:If you guys are going to try to retain the old yellow chipboard color scheme (which I hope), I'd choose font type 10 over here [http://www.baka-tsuki.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=873] as it goes well with the style.

:-- [[User:Jc100|Jc100]] 14:28, 14 February 2007 (PST)

Apologize for my poor English first,I'm one of clannad gamers in China,you know,we have a translate group named Key Fans Club(KFC),they've done the translation of the Clannad,except for KOTOMI and After Story.Another group of translators(they're defer,dwing,yreer and so on)have done the machine-translated Clannad(All Contents),and they've just done the manual translation of KOTOMI.As you can see,the only part we need is After Story,which takes about one third of Clannad.We have already done the CRACK of RealLive(ver.1.3.5.4,support audio replay),and KFC even added some features in order to be sure that the KFC Translated Version will not be modified or used by other translators.And another group,especially dwing,he has already added a feature that Clannad can use AAC or OGG format for audio storage.As for a gamer,I'll be glad if we can work together,that we,gamers could get the full version of Clannad sooner.(KFC has been translating Clannad for about 2 years).
You may contact KFC at its GuestBook http://www.keyfc.net/bbs/list.asp?boardid=15,and you can contact Defer GROUP at yreer@163.com.(yreer is one of the important members of the group.)-------------A Sincerely Gamer.

== Patch section? ==

I know this is really jumping the gun, but maybe you should consider adding a "Patch" section. There are a few questions I've seen people ask like "Will the voice patch work?" etc. Instead of having them go all the way to the forums, it would be easier for them to just look at the project page and see a few frequently asked questions answered. Well, this the translation isn't even 80% complete and the editing is ongoing, etc. so it probably is too early to add a section like this.

--[[User:Jumpyshoes|Jumpyshoes]] 21:08, 19 October 2007 (PDT)

== SEEN ==
Yatta! All of the SEENS are bolded! [[User:Hiiragi Kagami|Hiiragi Kagami]] 19:33, 29 February 2008 (PST)

:Omedetou gozaimasu! ^^

== Broken Link? ==

Shouldn't someone fix the [http://clannad.thewafflehouse.net/ websites'] link to the wiki? It's redirecting to http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index2.php?title=Clannad which shows No Input File Specified rather than http://www.baka-tsuki.net/project/index.php?title=Clannad which works.

The Screenshots and Download links also have an extra 2 after the index in both their links which stops it from working.

[Edit: Someone fixed it now. Thanks.]

== Clannad Standard with PS2 voice patch? ==

Just wondering if the normal edition of clannad with the ps2 voice patch as ogg files is going to be fully supported? [[User:122.109.43.82|122.109.43.82]] 07:52, 8 May 2008 (PDT)

== Consistency Questions ==

For Fuuko, are we going with wood carving or wooden carving?
[Will insert more later. Feel free to put your own question here as well if you have one.]

Are we using '?!' or '!?' ? A lot of the SEEN files I've gone through use '?!', so I'm assuming that's what we should use.
Also, I think [Not completely sure.] that the text switches between 'okay' and 'ok' in some parts. Are we using 'okay' or 'ok'.

:On an English level, the interrobang (?!)comes in both forms. It works as a tone modifier when making an explicative sentence. If it's more of a question, the question mark comes first. If it's more of a shout, the exclamation leads. Though, the writers of the ''Chicago Manual of Style'' would kill me for stating this.
:[[User:M|M]] 14:41, 13 June 2008 (PDT)

Big Dango Family, Dango Daikazoku, or Big Dumpling Family?
:It should be "The Big Dango Family" if it's about the title and not a description of a one huge family. Reason is, all dango are dumplings but not all dumplings are dango. Dango are a kind of dumpling much like sharks are a kind of fish. Leaving it as it is should be fine. -DGreater1

Gramps and Pops are proper nouns, yet they are uncapitalized in the text. Should they stay uncapitalized, or should they be capitalized.

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-10T13:08:52Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1502]]
**Line 0079, <Original's meaning is different from alternate's.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0142, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0145, <"Break off from him"? Could be phrased better.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0148, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0164, <Check comments.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0170, <Same as 0145.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <Compare original and alternate.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0278, <Would 'if' be more clear if it were replaced with 'as long as'?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 06:08, 10 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-10T02:10:37Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1501]]
**Line 0171, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0230, <The original and new wordings have different meanings.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0283, <The transition is shaky. Why is it, "That's the idea"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0307, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0318, <Alternate is completely different from original.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0321, <It might just be me, but this sentence is weird.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 19:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-10T01:10:24Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same 0336.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1430]]
**Line 0055, <Confusing phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0117, <Same 0055.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0358, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0488, <Suggest the alternate. The original is worded awkwardly.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <Suggest moving the second clause in front.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 18:10, 9 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-10T00:32:33Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1429]]
**Line 0045, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0109, <Doesn't suggest asking.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0120, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0138, <Translation check.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0295, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0336, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0348, <Same as above.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:32, 9 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Talk:Clannad

2008-07-09T23:10:58Z

OceanBlue:

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-09T23:10:50Z

OceanBlue:

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-09T23:06:45Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
*[Clannad:SEEN1428]]
**Line 0023, <Phrased ambiguously.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0026, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0088, <Shouldn't we add some apostrophes in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0140, <Might need to be rephrased.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0299, <Should the two 'it' be changed to them?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0311, <Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0344, <Word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0848, <Can we switch around the clauses, so the reader has context before we describe the person?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0889, <It would make more sense if the clauses are switched around.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)
**Line 1093, <"Since a while" sounds odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:06, 9 July 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-07-01T03:01:11Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

The following pages have been marked for cleanup. See [[Template:Clannad:Cleanup]] for more information.

== Files To be TL Checked ==
'''Translators, please pass over the list of files here and mark when it's done. Thanks.
*[[Clannad:SEEN6801]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6802]]
*[[Clannad:SEEN6803]]

== Files to be reviewed ==
Editors, please enter here any SEEN files that you feel you would like to change tense for, but have no idea if it will affect Japanese meaning. A Translator will look over your change and approve it if it is deemed acceptable. Format is the following:

<pre>
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
*[[Clannad:SEENxxxx]]
**Line ####, <insert note here> --~~~~
</pre>

*[[Clannad:SEEN2419]]
**Line 0000, <Sunohara appeared after first period ended, so the tense should reflect this.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2421]]
**Line 0038, <This line should be the same tense as line 39.> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0069, <There's and was should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0105, <"They made a bitter smile" sounds weird - maybe "They smiled bitterly"? Also, who are they bidding farewell?> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0174, <showed, pretend, and doesn't should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0229, <called and we're should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0385, <tumbles and started should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0395, <arrive and rang should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 15:34, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN2426]]
**Line 0031, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0033, <Check that revision is correct> --[[User:A|A]] 23:09, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3416]]
**Line 0081, <talked should be the same tense as walk> --[[User:A|A]] 13:04, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN3424]]
**Line 0010, <Although the sentence is grammatically correct, I recommend changing it to "She stares at me with her hands on her hips."> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0191, <left and move should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0401, <says and showed should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 23:04, 9 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN4423]] === *Checked*
**Line 0112, I can't quite put my finger on why, but this sentence needs to be reworded. --[[User:A|A]] 17:42, 8 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6421]]
**Line 0168, <First part of the sentence should happen before or at the same time as the second.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0181, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0423, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6422]]
**Line 0403, <Fuuko should use third person, right? This also applies to lines 405-408.> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0558, <Check that revision is still correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0763, <Have should be had so that it matches the tense of the rest of the clause> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0816, <Sentence should be one tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6423]]
**Line 0325, <Both verbs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6425]]
**Line 0296, <Should this be "Just let him go"?> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6426]]
**Line 0268, <Check that revision is correct(See history for details)> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
**Line 0470, <"Stepped out" sounds awkward> --[[User:A|A]] 17:19, 7 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6427]]
**Line 0086, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0199, <Should this be "that big of an accomplishment"?> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0400, <Needs clarification (What does 'a notes' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0434, <Needs clarification (What does 'please tuck in' mean?)> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0462, <Needs clarification> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0465, <pressed, reads, and packs should be the same tense> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0499, <See line 400> --[[User:A|A]]
**Line 0540, <See line 434> --[[User:A|A]] 00:09, 11 March 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6726]]
**Line 0116, <Check that revision is correct ("for that" seems redundant)> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6727]]
**Line 0118, <what is plotters supposed to mean?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN6729]]
**Line 0268, <Should this be "Furukawa Bakery's land mine"?> --[[User:A|A]] 19:18, 5 March 2008 (PST)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1417]]
**Line 0087, <Wording doesn't suggest scoring. If the wording is changed, 0088 will have to be changed to agree.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0115, <Wouldn't "seriously" fit better when it's modifying "hurt" instead of "get"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0119, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0121, <It would be better if "do" is replaced with "make".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0129, <Comma splice. See comment.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1418]]
**Line 0034, <Is "grab a hold" a common saying? Suggesting removing "a hold of".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <What does "Tonbi." mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0061, <What is "Hyo~ hyororo~"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0094, <What does "hold it just in front of her" mean? Will it mean the same thing if "just" is taken out?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:58, 13 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1421]]
**Line 0004, <Comma splice. Recommending either splitting the sentence into two sentences or using a semicolon.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <Wouldn't "turn a corner" be better than "turn to a corner"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0057, <We need to change the past tense, since she's still remembering it. How about, "She's remembering" or "She remembers"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0079, <"make with" would fit better than "do about"> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0118, <The pronouns are confusing. The sentence needs to point out that he's talking about the starfish.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1422]]
**Line 0016, <Fuuko's trying to do something or make something that people will be happy with?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0017, <If line 0016 is supposed to be "make", then this line should be changed to reflect that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0051, <Would "it's got to be her" work better as "it has to be her"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0058, <The current sentence says that he's stretching a wooden starfish. Needs revision/rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0067, <Previous and this sentence start with "But". Can we get rid of this one?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1423]]
**Line 0003, <What does "poking in the doorway" mean?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0020, <What does this line mean? Also, is this supposed to be redundant with 0021?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0032, <Why would he say, "This is amusing" and follow with, "Go away"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0036, <Sentence has odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0039, <Since Fuuko uses "Strange Person" as a name, why don't we keep that in this sentence?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0065, <Need translator check, since alt and original are very different.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0066, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0073, <How does, "Don't you have something to say to Fuuko" lead to this? It doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0074, <Where did "earlobes" come from?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0192, <Would it work if "that sort of person doesn't exist." was changed to "doesn't exist."? Also, recommending that "person" is changed to "people" to match the next line.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0253, <Sentence has odd phrasing> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1426]]
**Line 0029, <Maybe we should add a subject to this sentence.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "I wonder what sort of things would be good to talk about?" - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0040, <How can the rustling of something be still? It isn't rustling then.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "The noises in the corridor ceased." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0132, <The end of the sentence seems to be missing something. Might need rephrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
***Fixed with "She began speaking as though it were difficult for her to say." (Wrong Tense) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0142, <"So are you quitting?" seems inappropriate for this situation.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Not sure what to say for this one... I'd would've said 'bailing' but Nagisa wouldn't say that :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]]
**Line 0149, <Nagisa didn't skip a grade. She was held back.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "Having had repeated a grade, she only thought of herself as a nuisance." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0188, <Needs to be present tense, but "knew" is messing me up.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Tense seems correct, leaving it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0212, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Replaced with “But, when I next get a chance to talk with you for a while..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0243, <The way it's phrased implies that Furukawa calls Ibuki over, but Ibuki calls Furukawa over.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** The line is grammatically correct, it has more of a neutral implication/no implication. It is worded a little awkwardly, but I can't offer a better alternative. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0249, <Why do I feel that "them" needs to be "it"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I'm leaning towards 'it' as well, but I dunno really :P - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0346, <She's still thinking that, so shouldn't it be, "I'm always..."?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I'm always thinking about that." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0369, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Basically they intend to return at another time. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0395, <Why does he wonder that if it's already been told to him?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Fixed with "I guess they never told anyone but the sleeping Fuuko..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0467, <Is 'I' supposed to be 'I'd'? He didn't laugh in the past, but it's awkward in the present tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** "Laugh" should be "answer/reply". Fixed with "So, that's how I replied." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0662, <Would it be better if "if" were replaced with "when"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I think 'when' is better (a tad less accurate though?) Replaced with "Even if you get treated like that, you're still angry..." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0820, <He pokes her head, but Nagisa says "hit".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** That's Nagisa mistaking Tomoya's little prod ;) - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0834, <Don't understand this sentence. Fuuko wouldn't be lying if she says her last name is Ibuki.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** Apparently "Ghost Fuuko"'s name is "Isogai Fuuko"? Really unsure on this one. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0873, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 17:24, 14 June 2008 (PDT)
*** I feel it needs revision, I have no better alternative though. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0414]]
**Line 0045, <The guidelines say that this is supposed to be in the present tense, yet DG1's comment says that the original Japanese line is in the past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0046, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0047, <The tense of this line depends on the tense of line 0045.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 is definitely past tense, we should leave it. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0076, <Does Tomoya say this during the lesson or after the lesson? If during, lines 0077 and 0078 should be in the present tense. If after, "has" should be "had".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***I can definitely see where you're coming from, but the tenses in the lines now are correct, even if 0076 itself sounds a bit weird. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 17 June 2008
**Line 0097, <One part of the sentence is in the past tense and the other is in the present tense. Is he still reflecting or commenting on what should be done now?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***Line 0045 fixed with "It would've been better if he had just completely ignored me." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0127, <Can "that" be changed with "them"? The current line could either read as, "I can't afford headphones" or "I can't afford to listen to headphones." "them" would be more precise.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The line is saying he doesn't have stuff that valuable, I think the current line is a good fit between literal meaning and readability. - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
**Line 0166, <Alts. suggest that Tomoya means "At the time of graduation," but the current line doesn't convey that.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 12:54, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
***The original Japanese line doesn't convey it, it only says "Well, only that time." - [[User:Blatt|Blatt]] 18 June 2008
*[[Clannad:SEEN0415]]
**Line 0071, <Hip-hop isn't a noun.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0099, <What's the past tense for "spit"? The sentence should be in past tense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0124, <What is "There" referring to? I think it's referring to the "original", in which case "There isn't!" should be 'It wasn't!'> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0156, <This is translated differently than 0303, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0169, <"That's right" doesn't make sense in this context, does it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0202, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0219, <This is translated differently than 0366, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0244, <This is translated differently than 0389, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Shouldn't it be, "No, I wouldn't, I wouldn't... or something like that?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0301, <"then" disrupts the sentence. We need it to read like Dickens wrote it.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0303, <This is translated differently than 0156, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0316, <See 0169.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0349, <See 0202.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0366, <This is translated differently than 0219, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0389, <This is translated differently than 0244, even if they have the same Japanese text. Consistency problem.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0412, <See 0267.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0551, <This line doesn't make sense. It makes the most sense if it's what happens if Tomoya decides not to visit Nagisa, but then "when" should be "if", "approached" should be "approach", and "was" should be "would be" or "would seem".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0562, <Probably supposed to be one sentence, and what does it mean by, "worrying about your junior"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0597, <Sentence doesn't agree with discussion. Discussion places it as recent but sentence says, "Just a while ago".> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0864, <Uses present tense, but he isn't asking right now. Should be, "You'll ask", but I'm not completely sure.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 14:23, 17 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0416]]
**Line 0084, <Not sure if this should be past tense. He thought that when they first met in the past, right?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0151, <Tense? Also, does anyone agree that "topic" should be plural because of "all"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0157, <Either take out "had" or change it to "has", depending on the context.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Either means, "If I leave out lunch, I'm in the dormitory the entire time." or "If I don't eat lunch, I'll be in the dormitory the entire time."> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0203, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0268, <Inconsistent with 0606.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <Inconsistent with 0619.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0422, <"Beside" is odd.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0606, <Inconsistent with 0268.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0619, <Inconsistent with 0281.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0641, <Agree with Delwack.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0656, <Is this supposed to signify that afternoon classes and homeroom have ended?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0661, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0696, <See 0656.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0728, <Doesn't agree with alts.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0729, <Japanese text uses a comma, not an ellipsis.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0731, <Japanese text uses an ellipsis, not a comma.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 16:49, 18 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN0417]]
**Line 0142, <"Nobody" is singular, and "they" is plural.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0267, <Same as 0142.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0372, <Shouldn't "that" be "if"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0534, <Odd phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0540, <"also leave"? With who?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0564, <"usual thing as always" is redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0603, <"be" doesn't make sense.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0611, <"gets" seems unnecessary.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0650, <"myself as well" is redundant, because "myself" makes "as well" implied.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 10:54, 23 June 2008 (PDT)
*[[Clannad:SEEN1427]]
**Line 0070, <"can hear is that of Fuuko carving." is awkward.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0081, <"this" or "these"?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0085, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0086, <Tense inconsistency.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0106, <Question with word choice.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0143, <This line and the next are weird. Also with asterisk.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0167, <Same as 0143> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0189, <Can we change or omit, "In return"? It makes the sentence seem redundant.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0212, --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0233, <Awkward phrasing.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0273, <Shouldn't this be in the present tense?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0274, <See 0273.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0281, <How can you quietly gaze at the floor and say something at the same time?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0297, <Popular?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0354, <Same as 0297.> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0364, <Without who knowing it?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)
**Line 0398, <Quiet conversation?> --[[User:OceanBlue|OceanBlue]] 20:01, 30 June 2008 (PDT)

You may return to the main page [[Clannad|here]].

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-06-23T17:54:57Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-06-18T23:49:39Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-06-17T21:23:06Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-06-17T19:54:42Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-06-16T03:38:25Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

User talk:OceanBlue

2008-06-15T00:25:36Z

OceanBlue:

Random CLANNAD editing notes:

Confused with <0064> - <0074> on SEEN1423.
Currently re/editing: SEEN1427. Working on Fuuko's route. Remember to record in ClanandCleanup.

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-06-15T00:24:57Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-06-14T04:05:24Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

User talk:OceanBlue

2008-06-14T04:00:01Z

OceanBlue:

Random CLANNAD editing notes:

Confused with <0064> - <0074> on SEEN1423.
Currently re/editing: SEEN1419. Working on Fuuko's route. Remember to record in ClanandCleanup.

Category:ClannadCleanup

2008-06-14T03:58:03Z

OceanBlue: /* Files to be reviewed */

User talk:OceanBlue

2008-06-13T17:52:42Z

OceanBlue: New page: Random CLANNAD editing notes: Confused with <0064> - <0074> on SEEN1423.

Random CLANNAD editing notes:

Confused with <0064> - <0074> on SEEN1423.

Talk:Clannad

2008-06-13T17:51:32Z

OceanBlue:

Talk:Clannad

2008-06-13T03:01:00Z

OceanBlue:

Kara no Kyoukai:Chapter05 05

2008-06-01T17:15:57Z

OceanBlue: defaced , --> defaced,

'''/5 Paradigm Paradox'''

Winter's arrived. 

Like my summer, the autumn that came to these streets seems to have been short as well. 

Looking out from the office window, the streets are overcast by a cold sky that threatens to snow at any time. Day by day the traces of autumn disappear to the point where one begins to think the abnormal weather has erased the word autumn from the list of seasons. 

That's right. In the short period from the end of September to this day of November 7, I ran through life like a prized racehorse. 

To speak of my life during that time, from the start of October I was at a driving school ran by one of my relatives. This school is like a boarding school where students stay for 3 weeks and finish a normal course in a shorter space of time. 

Leaving this street for nearly a month didn't appeal to me, but I couldn't turn down my relative's offer and Touko-san - my boss at work - approved the trip, so I ended up having no choice but to go. And so my 3 weeks in the school, which felt like a concentration camp in some ways, finished and I came back to this place, where I was born and grew up. 

"... Mmm, name: Kokuto Mikiya." 

For no reason at all, I read the contents on the license in my hand. 

My name is clearly printed on the small license. Apart from that, my registration location, my birth date, current address, and a photo of my face are on it. There's really only a minimal amount of personal information entered on it, but among all the proofs of identity an individual can possess it is the one with the greatest range of uses. --- That point was just so strange that I couldn't stand it. 

"What kind of qualification would this thing called a license be, Touko-san?" 

I address Touko-san, who is sleeping on the bed in one corner of the same room. Of course, I don't expect anything like a response. 

"--- It's a contract, that thing." 

However, Touko-san kindly responded. 

This person caught a horrible cold and has already spent nearly a week lying in bed. She was sleeping till a moment ago with a 38 degree fever, but it seems she just woke up. 

The reason --- she's probably hungry. 

It's reasonable, the time is already past noon. 

Right now, I'm at the company office. 

To be accurate, this is Touko-san's personal room, which is on the fourth floor of the building where the office is; this room is a place I don't normally frequent. Having moved the chair to be by the window, I'm looking at the license I got only a short time ago while Touko-san is lying in bed. 

... Nevertheless it wasn't an ero-material situation. It was simply that Touko-san is lying in bed with a cold. What awaited me when I got back from the boarding school was a Shiki who silently condemned me for something, and my boss who was in bed with a cold. 

These two people claimed to have become friendlier in the time I was away, but Shiki flatly refused to nurse Touko-san, and I think she even went so far as to say something along the lines of, 'I hope your brain melts away'. ... Shiki, who displayed the same coldness as ever, is a friend of mine from high school. Full name, Ryougi Shiki. Sex, female. Her manner of speaking is rough so now and then there are people who confuse her gender. 

On the other hand, the woman in front of me who has a cold towel upon her head is called Aozaki Touko and is the boss of the company where I work. I am the only employee, so it is a little awkward to call it a company. 

This person has a genius's nature and, as those kinds of people sometimes do, has few acquaintances. Even after catching a cold, she said that she didn't do anything and laid in bed for the whole day. The person in question was saying that it couldn't be helped since she didn't have an immunity to this cold at the current time or some nonsense like that. 

... Personally, I think that if you don't have any immunity it's really not the time to be sleeping, but as a magus Touko-san probably doesn't feel like seeing a doctor. No doubt the thing called pride is stopping her. 

Due to those circumstances, I couldn't really meet up with Shiki after a month away and ended up nursing Touko-san for the whole day.

A contract. Weakly uttering her reply, Touko-san picked up the glasses on the bedside table. 

Normally, she seems so sinister that one doesn't quite notice that she is a beautiful woman, but the current Touko-san, who was suffering from a cold, was so gentle and pretty that you could think she was someone else. 

In order to clear her still drowsy consciousness, Touko-san keeps talking. 

"That, you see, is a contract saying you have mastered driving. It says that you have learnt something important, but the objective has changed. In this country, it's no longer a matter of getting a qualification as a result of learning, but learning in order to get the qualification. When you obtain the qualification, what you learnt loses its meaning. A qualification which has degraded to merely being evidence saying 'I have learnt this much' is like a contract." 

Touko-san raised herself up and added, does the chicken come first, or the egg?. 

"But isn't a qualification something like that? After all, everyone studies with a goal in mind." 

"Of course, there are always opposites. It's a topic with no conclusion because goals and results, behaviours and processes are dissociated things (Translator note: uhh what the heck does this mean Touko? Stop speaking in professor mode!) . There will be people who start driving because they got a license, just as there will be those who, while they get their driver's license, skip any instruction and take the exam right away." 

She normally speaks gently when she has her glasses on, she's even gentler then usual today, maybe because she's sick. 

I digress, but when this person went to take the test, she got such flawless results in the written and practical tests that she apparently got her license while being glared at by the examiner. 

"I did hear about people getting a license without going to a driving school, and I see Touko-san was such a case. ... Speaking of which, the image of you going to a driving school is just ---." 

--- So scary, I can't imagine it. 

Apparently unamused by my hastily swallowed comment, Touko-san frowns and looks sharply in this direction. "Isn't that a discourtesy  Mikiya-kun? In those days I was still a student, so there would have been nothing strange about me going to a driving school if I chose to. I was no different from any ordinary university student." 

Touko-san talks with her eyes closed as if she's complaining. 

"... That's right. Now that I think about it, Touko-san was once a teen too." Imagining what she would have looked like as a lovable young girl still in her studies, I couldn't help but swallow my breath, because that was a mental attack strong enough to squeeze my heart. 

"... That picture seems a whole lot more abnormal ma'am." 

"--- You are slowly revealing your true sentiments while the other party is a patient, aren't you?" 

Of course. Usually I'm the one that keeps getting picked on, so if I don't at least retaliate at a time like this, things don't balance out. 

When I stood up to replace the towel for her, Touko-san said she was hungry, revealing a very frank craving. Distressingly, the porridge that was made for her ran out this morning. 

"Shall I go an buy something from the store? Say, udon with eggs." 

"No ~, that's all soggy. Hey, Mikiya-kun, won't you make something for me? You live alone, so you know how to cook right?" 

The idea that if you live alone you know how to cook, just who spread that groundless rumour? Letting my shoulders fall (Translator's note: There a phrase that would fit in to replace that but I can't think of it) under Touko-san's anticipatory gaze, I firmly declared to her the harsh truth. 

"Sorry, the only things I can make are noodles. The lowest rank consisting of pouring hot water into a cup of instant noodles, and the highest rank being pasta. If that's okay I will use the kitchen for a bit." 

As expected, Touko-san wore a bluntly disgusted face. 

"Then where did you get this morning's porridge from? It was a taste that couldn't have come from a convenience store." 

"That was Shiki's. She says that she doesn't cook very often, but it turns out she's pretty skilled when it comes to Japanese food." 

Oho, Touko-san goes  and blinks as if she's surprised. I was of that opinion too, but really, Shiki has cooked well enough to shame a chef. Shiki comes from a distinguished family and because of that, her sense of taste is extraordinarily high class. For herself, she will eat anything, but I think that's because she didn't make it so any taste can be forgiven. Shiki cooking meant preparing something that she herself could tolerate, so it's really no wonder that her cooking skills went up as a result. 

"--- How surprising, Shiki doing something for me. But well, that fits. Since that kid is adept at using a knife. ... I suppose it can't be helped. There are some bottles of pills on the desk, so can you get them for me?" 

Realising she can't get a meal off of me, Touko-san lies back on the bed. 

When I went to get the three medicine bottles on Touko-san's desk --- one photo caught my attention. 

It looks like a scene from a foreign land. A brick road and a clock tower that looks as if it could come from a movie. Beneath a grey sky that looks as if it will start snowing at any moment, three people are standing next to each other. 

Two men and a girl. 

Both men are of tall stature and one seems Japanese. The other person looks native to that land and fits in so well with the scenery that there is no sense of incongruity about him. No --- it's actually that the presence of the Japanese man is so strong. The sense of existence that flows off that Japanese man standing there with a dark expression is so powerful, it rises up from the picture. ... A heaviness so strong it becomes hard to breathe. I once felt it close up.  

That was, yeah. Could it have just been a sensation from that unforgettable time. While I gazed at the photo to try and confirm that, something even more striking caught my eye. 

The Japanese man is wearing a coat reminiscent of a black kimono, and the handsome blond man with blue eyes is in a red coat. 

There is a girl standing between those two. 

Ebon black hair which makes the black coat of the Japanese man look pale. The hair that flows down below her waist; rather than hair it seems like some wonderfully beautiful decoration. 

A calm face that still tinged with the innocence of childhood; in one word I could describe it as radiant. The girl is so excessively beautiful that it feels like she will snatch away my soul through the photo. --- One is provoked into wondering if mixing a Japanese ghost with the beauty of a flower blooming in the shadows and a fairy from a western fairy tale wouldn't result in a human like this. 

"Touko-san, this photo ---." 

Without even realising it, I was mumbling those words. 

Touko-san takes off her glasses as she replies. 

"Oh? Ah, those are my old friends. I couldn't remember what they looked like, so I took that out of my album. --- Around the time I was in London, it was a unique mistake." 

When Touko-san takes off her glasses, her manner of speaking is the first thing to change. Previously, my friend Ryougi Shiki had a somewhat obscure dual personality, but this person called Aozaki Touko really changes identities as if flicking a switch. She says that it's actually her personality and not her identity that changes, but from my perspective it doesn't really matter what it is. 

To sum up the Touko-san who has taken off her glasses in one phrase, she's a cold person. 

A cold mode of behaviour and speech, a cold ideology, a cold reason --- an image of humanity formed from those sorts of things, that is the Touko-san without glasses. 

"I guess it's a few years back now. Around the time when my little sister was entering high school, roughly eight years ago now. Remembering people's faces is my specialty, but for some reason I'm poor at recalling those memories. And I don't feel like tidying it up into a nice shape either since it's a pointless exercise." 

Still lying on the bed, Touko-san keeps talking as if she's absorbed in thought. ... For Touko-san to be talking about her past, it's not something you see very often. I think it was true when she said that this was her first time catching a cold. I guess sick people do act differently. (TN: this is a very rough translation, it does have something to do concern sick people acting weird)  

"London --- that's the capital of England right?" 

Putting the three medicine bottles at the head of Touko-san's bed, I pull up a nearby chair and sit down next to the bed. Touko-san takes out some pills from the bottles and swallows them, then lies down and starts talking. 

"Yes. At the time, having run away from my grandfather, there was nowhere for me to go. I calculated that there was nothing else for an amateur mage, who didn't even have the skills or the resources to make an atelier, to do but go under the wing of a large organisation. It's like an university. The equipment is worn, defaced, and failing, but there's nothing wrong with the establishment itself. In the shadows of a large museum, there was a western-eastern ancient and modern age research department. Of course it was actually the association that nourished so many of today's mages. That  was also a treasury beyond my wildest hopes." 

Soliloquising  as if dazed by the fever, Touko-san's complexion kept getting paler. When I got worried thinking that those pills might have been poison instead of medicine, Touko-san assured me that it wasn't poison. 

"It's a good opportunity, so just let me talk a little longer. 

... It was difficult for a girl not yet twenty to study abroad, especially since an Aozaki gets treated like a heretic. In order to enter that place I decided to specialise in rune sorcery. At the time rune wasn't popular, and there were few people studying it. The association side needed a researcher too, so stabilising the rune characters from that side took me 2 years, and another few years to approach the originals in the Tule association, so it may have been about the time I just got my own workroom. 

One day, while I was absorbed in making the doll that was my goal, I met that man. Someone who possessed a unique personal history, like originally being a Tamil priest. He was a hellish man. His strong will and tempered shell, it was like an eternally burning drive for achievement. 

... Hellish. What I mean by saying that, Kokuto, is that if the idea of Hell was to gain a will and take the form of a man, my hypothesis is that it would be something like him. To the degree that he couldn't accept others, he was just absorbing misery. His ability as a mage was full of flaws, but his strong ego surpassed everything. 

--- It was a coarse guy like that who I fell for." 

As if she's looking at the man in her memories, Touko-san thinly opens her eyes. Her look is an undecipherable one that looked of either hatred or compassion. 

Without even really knowing the contents of the story very well, I say, "Oh, that's how it was," and agree with her. Not annoying the patient is the main point behind nursing. 

"Oho, so Touko-san's doll making is a foreign art?" 

To that question which was perfectly unsuited to the mood, Touko-san says, yes it is, and nods seriously (TN: awful phrasing here I know | "Yes it is", Touko-san nods seriously to this question entirely unsuited to her mood.) . 

Listening to Touko-san's mutterings is fine, but not being able to understand what it means makes me feel sorry as a listener. That's why I would prefer that she tells this kind of story to Shiki or Azaka, but the fever-addled Touko-san raised the gear on the story's incomprehensibility. 

"The reason I got into doll making you see, was to reach 「out for the perfect」through the perfect human body. 

Adversely he chose to try and reach 「out for the」through the soul, or in other words, an existence that is 「there」but 「not there」, like a cat inside an unfathomable box. The box has a definite form, so you can't see inside it, but the formless soul can be seen into. 

It's similar to the collective subconsciousness some psychologist proposed. He probably thought that if he felt his way along that chain, he would eventually reach the heart. 

Ah, but you see, we both were trying for  the original work. The one original, you could call it, humanity's individuality . Modern humans have become so divided that their lineages and attributes are already impossible to divine. Therefore it's impossible to reach the origin. Lineages and attributes, or in other words fate. It's like a number form, so a life only achieves a certain result if this ability and that role is poured in.  A life that can only achieve this result. It's natural, since the genes have only been granted those abilities. If you call that fate then it will be fate. 

The pinnacle of creation has become too complicated. Probably as a result of being invested with too many abilities after pursuing omnipotence. The genes that are the data which form a human are nothing more than four different bases, but the simple spiral formed by stacking those four types of bases has fallen into the paradox that, by being piled up till it was impossible to measure, it really has become impossible to measure. 

So --- I decided that the only thing to do was to make it myself, although the result was cruel. No matter how hard I tried, the only thing I could make was a perfect me." 

The medicine must have started working as the colour returns to Touko-san's cheeks. 

The eyes that stare into the air too, their focus gets steadily blurred. 

"But --- that person will still be going on.  

The guy that looked toward humanity's 'origin', he said that he got expelled by his teacher while searching for the form of the soul. ... There must be some sort of karma, for him to be getting involved in this kind of thing at this point. Do you understand, Kokuto? I'll warn you beforehand: no matter what happens, do not approach the man in the photo." 

Touko-san spoke as if squeezing out the last dregs of her strength, then she fell asleep straight away. 

Her slight chest moves up and down, repeating quiet breaths. The medicine had definitely taken effect, and she has fallen asleep. 

Changing the wet towel on Touko-san's forehead, I left the room so as not to wake her. 

There's no one in the office next door. 

Only a high toned noise can be heard from the factories around the building. 

Feeling that trailing noise on my skin I muttered to myself. 

"--- Don't approach him? I can't, Touko-san. You see, I knew that guy two years ago." 

But what significance that fact has, I can't know. No, I'm not even sure if the person who helped me then is the guy in the photo. 

Inside me, that person in the photo is unidentifiable, and the fever-ridden Touko-san's words are scattered around like puzzle pieces. 

Uncertain things call out uncertain words. It's only that, but the air that was calm till just now thins out, and it feels like I'll run out of oxygen. 

An uneasiness I can't express with words sends a shiver down my spine.