BlazBlue:Phase Shift 1 Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Part 1

When there was no memory, there was no past.

When there was no past, there was a period of time when he wasn't alive.

All this time, Kazuma was always wondering whether he was truly alive.

Just what exactly was the he who was standing here presently? Was he alive or dead? Had he truly been born? Did he really even exist?

Such doubts always plague his mind.

Since the next day, Kazuma's mind was lighter.

When he woke up on morning, putting on uniform, and heading toward the academy he had gone to for seven years, he was so cheerful. Greeting the morning with such mood was the first time for him to experience it according to his short-term memory.

Usually, he had been living with uncertainty drifting around him. It felt like there wasn't a purpose even when he breathed.

He had wasted the unending time from these seven years only to wonder how deep rootless grass was buried under.

But today was different. No, it would surely be different starting from today.

His memory still hadn't returned and Kazuma still remained an extremely mediocre student. But there was just one big difference.

Kazuma had gotten a 'purpose'.

The reason was originated from last night.

A mysterious man who called himself Terumi had told him. Its existence was only known to limited number of people, but the Azure certainly existed in this world.

"If you can get the Azure, you can take back whatever you want. Everything. Things you lost, things you forgot, whatever."

Terumi's speech was like a tale from a dream.

Bur for Kazuma, it was indeed like a tale from a dream.

"If I have the thing called Azure, I can get my memories back?"

"Idiot. Not only memories. Everything, eeeeeverything. I said whatever it is, right?"

Whatever it is.

He had heard the most tempting phrase.

Until now, Kazuma had never been proactive in remembering his past. It was because he was afraid if he realized that there was no past to remember. And then, he was also afraid if he realized that he absolutely couldn't remember anything.

But if he got the Azure Terumi was talking about... perhaps he might have a chance.

"Azure..."

It was a warm morning. Kazuma was resting his chin in his hands on a desk of the academy's classroom, muttered while he was doing nothing.

Currently he was in the middle of a class with a female lecturer on her desk explaining about an important turning point regarding the history of magic. But as if her voice was distant like the congestion of the city, it never entered Kazuma's ears.

Kazuma's mind was occupied with nothing but the Azure.

Terumi never mentioned the specifics about that object. However, other than it definitely existed, he only gave a guarantee that it would give everything to Kazuma.

Terumi was a suspicious man whose background was unknown and never frankly showed his contentment.

Kazuma also had a thought that there was something wrong with him to just swallow the words of such a man. Normally when he thought about it, such convenient thing that Terumi had spoken of couldn’t possibly exist.

But even if he had doubts about it, Kazuma thought that it was okay even if it was a lie.

The important thing was that he wanted to get his memories back, and that there was a way to do so.

Out of just walking silently every day in the path of ordinary student which Relius Clover had arranged, it might be possible to return to those days as his true self.

It was okay even if it could only inspire such faint hope.

The bell marking the end of the class rang. Kazuma lifted his face as he came to his senses. In the end, there wasn't a single character filling his notebook. He also couldn't recall the contents of the lesson.

If it was the usual, he would have been more or less regretted that he had been dazing around. But today, there wasn't even a tiny amount of that feeling.

The lesson didn't matter. After Kazuma put the unused notebook and pen to his bag, he stood up with determination.

"...I'll search it."

I want to regain my memories back.

I want to know who and what kind of person I am.

It was the first time he clearly thought about that. As it was the first time he thought so, he felt that he was truly living in this world.

First, he must make it his objective to find out just what the Azure was and where it could be found.

Fortunately, this here was Ishana——the Magic Guild. The history hidden from the whole world was gathered in this island.

As Kazuma grabbed his bag, he left the classroom without looking aside.

Cutting across the academy's courtyard and then proceeded to the side of the auditorium, a building with soaring green roof on white wall appeared.

The building with its size approximately as big as a small scale school was the academy-managed Great Library.

Not only for the students, the library was opened for Magic Guild's staff members as well as the island's inhabitants. As the book collection consisted of books which weren't expected to survive or exist, it wasn't inferior to other libraries around the world.

It was reasonable for this library to have books that had existed in secret.

The inside was very large, and also very quiet.

The walls were white and there were endless polished stone tiles that went on and on. There were towering bookshelves as far as the tall ceilings. Ladders were placed everywhere in order to get book which was placed at high altitude.

The light from outside couldn't enter at all. All the illuminations were produced by magic. Different from artificial light bulb, the gentle lights gave off a whimsical atmosphere in the entire library.

Ever since the noon recess two days ago, Kazuma didn't attend classes, only going back and forth between the dormitory and here.

He attempted to use the search system for the book collection to look up about the Azure, but he was only guided to books that clearly didn't have any relation to it. Although he looked them over just to be sure, the majority of them were some sort of silly stories. Even if it wasn't like that, he couldn't rely upon the likes of artful writings and poems.

Lores which weren't made public, ancient magic patterns, synthetic table of alchemy. Every religious ceremonies around the world from ancient times. On top of those, the latest technology of science and medical treatment, also the combination between alchemy and science.

Even when he searched for books that came into his mind, it didn't appear they had the right description.

"Not good..."

When he closed the last copy of the book he brought from his countless round-trips, Kazuma's head fell over the desk while he groaned.

It looked like it didn't give any result.

He read books and books, but all of them were wrong. Since this failure couldn't make him to proceed even for one millimeter toward somewhere, he got broken hearted as expected.

"...Does it even exist?"

Azure that is.

He didn't expect to be able to examine it in details, but he didn't think that he couldn't find even a glimpse of it.

"In the first place, just what 'Azure' is...? It'd be nice if he just told me that much."

While grumbling, he poked the front cover of the book he had closed, feeling irritated.

Creature, substance, device, organization, belief, or concept. He couldn't get a plausible clue about what kind of object the obscure-named Azure was.

As his forehead hit the desk, Kazuma let out a sigh.

"Maybe I should ask Terumi again..."

However, it didn't seem likely for that man to tell him. He had asked various questions regarding the Azure, but in the end, he was told to look it up himself.

(Hmm, but wait.)

For example, in the case if Azure really existed and was an unfathomable technique that could make everything possible. Such ridiculous thing might not just simply be recorded in books.

Moreover, would such books usually get accessed and placed in these bookshelves which the people on the island or anyone else could read?

(If I think about it, it's not strange for it not to be here.)

It was natural if it was treated like classified information. And it sounded more credible, too.

However, even if that was true, what other places should he investigate? Since the books here didn't have information as far as rumors, there was no other way but to aim for the rumor he heard about the Magic Guild's highly classified information next.

(Magic Guild's highly classified information... huh.)

Despite the current Magic Guild's standpoint, there were things which were considered vital that shouldn't be publicized. Regardless that it was only their existences that were recognized, no one knew about the details.

The way to the deep underground below the Cathedral had secure barrier stretched which wouldn't let anyone other than Ten Saints to trespass. It might be stored there...

"Kazuma-san?"

"UWAH!?"

Tapped on the shoulder from behind, Kazuma, forgetting where he was, let out a hysterical voice.

The impulse made him fell from the chair. In a panic, he clung to the back of the chair and made clattering noise while lifting his face. As he did that, the smiling figure of Trinity was there.

"I'm sorry. Did I surprise you~?"

"I-It's okay. I was just a bit dazed."

Kazuma quickly got a look at his unsightly position. He smiled as if to smooth things over.

Pushing up her large circular glasses with her fingers, Trinity stared at the desk in wonder.

"Were you checking up on something?"

"Aah, yes. Something personal has been on my mind."

While answering without any offense, Kazuma piled up the thrown out books in haste and pushed them to the side of the table.

"Umm. I might sound meddling, but..."

Being conservative while lowering her eyebrows as if she was apologizing, Trinity started with the prelude.

"Today, it seems you didn’t attend the classes. You also didn't yesterday... and the afternoon before, too."

"...So you came to warn me? As one would expect from the well-conducted Trinity Glassfield-san. You don't overlook on your irresponsible fellow classmates."

He unintentionally let sarcasm slipped out.

Not expecting that kind of remark from Kazuma, Trinity looked a bit surprised and had a bewildered expression.

"Well, I have no intention like that. I apologize if I hurt your feeling."

Neatly putting both hands on front of her body, Trinity bowed her head courteously. Her soft platinum blonde hair gently swayed.

"Only... Kazuma-san, until now, you have never skipped classes even for once. I got a little worried in how you're doing~."

"You worried?"

Those words had a strange feeling to it.

How could she feel that way not to herself, but to someone else? Kazuma was baffled. She didn't wish for reward or expecting gratitude. The earnest kindness of Trinity was... awkwardly warm.

Even though he didn't think he deserved to receive such affection that asked nothing in return.

Unrelated to Kazuma's feeling, Trinity kept a light expression and smiled charmingly like a doll.

"If it isn't troubling you, can I assist you in the matter you're checking on? Since I come here often, I have a rough grasp on the kind of book and its whereabouts."

Hesitating to talk, Kazuma scratched his cheek. He would gladly accept it if the matter he was investigating was related to a lesson. But it wasn't the case. Besides.

"It pains me, but I was just about to finish. Sorry."

"Oh my... it's me who should apologize. It'd be nice if I had called out to you much sooner."

"Ha ha. Looks like it."

While using his laugh to feign ignorance, Kazuma didn't look at Trinity's eyes.

As Kazuma arranged the books and stood up, Trinity asked him with her mind in confusion.

"What were you searching for to make you secluded yourself in the library for two days?"

"Eh... Ah."

Just now, his body stiffened.

Peeking with sidelong glance, he saw Trinity looking at his direction with a curious look on her face.

She shouldn't have any ulterior motive. He understood that much. But having such pure and innocent eyes directed at him, made him couldn't help but think that she was only pretending to inflict great harm to him.

"Umm... It was something... about my memory."

He couldn't lie, but he couldn’t say the truth either.

However, Trinity didn’t have a slight doubt to Kazuma's vague reply. Putting both hands on her white cheeks, her eyes sparkled as she was both astonished and joyful.

"Oh! Could it be that you've remembered something?"

"No, it's not like that. Only, it seems... there's a way to recover it. But since the method isn't widely known, I thought that maybe I can get some clue."

Kazuma packed the books and arranged it before putting them back to the desk again.

He took a light breath. As he was with Trinity, he wanted to keep things like planning and calculating away.

When she was near, it was like time flowed slower.

Even with a slight hesitation remained in Kazuma's mind, he rubbed them off and opened his mouth again.

"...Can we have a little talk?"

"But of course."

Trinity's soft voice gently urged him.

Kazuma hesitated again... and then he began to talk.

"I haven't given much thought about my memory loss. But when I talked with someone and tried to do something in common... I can't handle it well no matter what. When something like that happens, the memory-less me feels cheated. It felt like my feelings and emotions weren't enough when compared to other person."

The impression he wanted to do was lacking and didn't strike at home. He didn't get the right tuning point.

He had a feeling like an important part was completely left out when his human soul was taking form.

"Sometimes, it feels like I'm different from other people. It'd be preferable if I were superior than the others, but I have a big disadvantage compared to other people. ...I feel like it's only me who don't have a presence."

"It must be... lonely."

Trinity murmured sympathy.

Saying sympathy that didn't have even a slight sarcasm on it seemed like Trinity's virtue.

"Of course I got used to it. It's not like I feels agony every day, you know? ...But."

Couldn't find the right word for it, Kazuma closed his mouth.

However, it was already enough. He felt that his feeling got a little bit refreshed.

Trinity was the first person he spoke his mind to. It might be because of the air she put, or rather the indifferent silence of the Great Library.

When the warm feeling came to an end, this time as he felt too much of embarrassment, Kazuma seemingly scratched his head roughly.

"Ah."

Suddenly, he had a thought.

When he raised his face, his eyes met Trinity's gaze while she had a blank look. Since Trinity herself couldn't clearly see Kazuma's eyes, it was Kazuma who knew that their gazes had collided.

"Trinity Glassfield-san. If I'm not mistaken, you are a close friend to Nine of the Ten Saints, right?"

"Eh? Yes, that's right~."

"Then can you talk over with her? It's extremely unlikely for the matter I'm searching for to be discovered in this library's books. But if it's the Magic Guild's highly classified information... if it's the confidential information that's stored inside the Cathedral by the Ten Saints, then...!"

Nine was a Ten Saints. Let alone inspecting highly classified information, she was in charge of it.

Certainly, she wouldn't comply if it was Kazuma who was asking. But she might be if it were Trinity's words. As he felt a slight hope, he lifted his head with a bit of expectation.

"Kazuma-san."

However, even that disappeared with Trinity's single word.

Trinity retracted her sweet smile and had her pink lips tightening. With seriousness that didn't suit her, she stared straight at Kazuma.

"I understand the matter you're searching for is very important to you. I know it's something beyond my comprehension, and I can tell you're really serious about it. But... your request isn't possible."

With meek demeanor, there was firm strength hidden in Trinity's words.

Kazuma sighed in disappointment. He didn't consider that it would go smoothly, but he got depressed after being strongly rejected.

"So it's no good?"

"Yes, it's not possible."

Even then, Trinity still gave a modest smile.

"I'm really sorry that I can't be of help."

"Oh no, forgive me for asking unreasonable things."

If he thought about it calmly, it was unthinkable for the gentle Trinity who also had a strong sense of duty to do something that would hurt her position as a friend. Once he knew it was useless, Kazuma had to think about the next step no matter what.

As he held the piled up books along with his bag, Kazuma lightly smiled in a friendly manner.

"It seems I said a rather strange story. Please forget about it. And thank you for your concern. I will return to the dorm once I put these books away."

Before he got questioned too many, Kazuma prepared to leave from the spot as if he was fleeing.

Trinity's voice stopped him from doing that. This time, it was the voice he had always heard. A sweet voice that was filled with affection.

"I'm sure Kazuma-san will get those memories back. That's why, please don't be so reckless. I'm willing to give you a hand if I'm capable of it."

Kazuma only looked over his shoulder. He replied with indifferent smile.

He was thankful with her sympathy. But sympathy alone wouldn't make him reach the Azure.

Part 4

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