MaruMA:MaHon:SSS4
Jennifer x Yuuri[edit]
"Hey, Mama, is Santa Claus real?"
"Oh, Yuu-chan, the day where you ask that question has finally come for you too, huh? The day you learn the truth about Santa Claus. What brand are those red clothes? Is that suspicious beard real? And, just how high is his blood sugar level!?"
"Blood sugar? I'm not talking about 'dippicult' stuff like that."
"Ehehe, that's right, that was an adult concern. Of course Santa exists, Yuu-chan. A news reporter somewhere said something like this: the important things are things you can't see."
"… You cut too much out of it so it doesn't make sense."
"You don't get it? Really? But Santa Claus is really real. He exists. I'm not sure what generation he is now, though. A card came in the mail addressed to you, didn't it?"
"… It wasn't handwritten."
"Oh, Yuu-chan! Don't say mean things. Santa is a foreigner so he has a huge complex about not being able to write in Japanese. And now you're asking for a handwritten card? That's bullying. That's a type of foul PLAY."
"But Santa Claus didn't come to our house last year."
"That's right. Scandinavia is really far away from Japan. It's so far away you have to get a connecting flight. Santa is real and he does have a reindeer sled, but that thing about the sled flying is a misunderstanding. I mean, it's impossible that a sled would fly through the sly– no, sky! If an engine like that existed in this world then Mama would have been on the Galaxy Express a long time ago." [1]
"Mama, you can't turn into a 'meter!'"
"Of course I won't turn into one. It's okay. I would never choose Tetsurou[2] over you, Yuu-chan. But if a reindeer sled traveled over land, it would have an accident before it got to Japan. He's not very Santa Close. Okay, that right now was Papa's bad joke, not Mama's." [3]
"But, but I heard that Santa went to my friend's house…"
"Oh dear! They must have unlicensed products in their house! Probably something like the 'Anywhere Doora.' If you have that, then no matter how little mobility a sled has, you can go door-TO-door all the way to Japan. But the Food and Health Bureau hasn't approved that yet so only DR.F. Fujio is allowed to use it. If you don't want your friend to be wanted by the police, keep this a secret between you and Mama." [4]
"Eh? If the real Santa comes he'll get arrested?"
"Shh! Do. Not. Ever. Say. That. Again. But it's okay. Papa has received an official commission from the Santa Company. When it comes to Yuu-chan and Sho-chan's presents, just leave it to Mama and Papa."
"Why is Papa being Santa? I knew that Papa put on red clothes and left the presents, but, but why is Papa Santa!?"
"Papa has been approved as the Shibuya family's official Santa Claus. If he puts on a costume and holds a sack, he's Santa for a day. Even if he's so drunk he can't say the name. Hey, there's a lot of those right? Station master for a day, chief of police for a day, yakuza boss for a day – it's the same thing."
"… Yakuza boss…"
"Of course if Papa is on a business trip then Mama will take on the job. Mini-skirt Santa for the day. If Mama is away, then Sho-chan will be Boy Santa for the day… Oh, what's wrong, Yuu-chan? Why are you crying? Did you not like Boy Santa? Eh, what is it? … Mama's mini-skirt… is… bad? Yuu-chan?"
| Back to Conrad x Gwendal x Günter | Return to MA Series | Forward to Wolfram x Yuuri |
- ↑ Reference to the train Galaxy Express 999 from the anime of the same name. Basically, it was a train that traveled through space.
- ↑ The main character in Galaxy Express 999
- ↑ The original Japanese joke was shoving the word for troubles or hardships(kurou 苦労) into Santa Claus(santa kuroosuサンタクロース) to get this ---> santa kurousuサンタ苦労ス. This makes it into Santa Having-a-hard-times.
- ↑ The 'Anywhere Door' (dokodemo doa) is from Doraemon which was created by Fujiko F. Fujio (pen name). The door was a device that took you anywhere. There's an 'a' on the end of it in the text because Jennifer pronounced it wrong (dokodemo doara)
