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(Maruma Cafe 2019) Short Stories

Gunter’s SS: Take care

Well then, shall we prepare for His Majesty’s trip?

First, a hand cloth to wipe the sweat and juices. In his Majesty’s world, it seems to be called ‘handkerchief’.

Actually, I’ll secretly spray my favorite perfume onto it….

Then, oh! What a great thing! His Majesty and I will smell the same all day.

(image: いってらっしゃい Take care)

Wait a moment! This handkerchief… before I sprayed it, it had a nice smell to it!? I feel like I’ve smelled this before.

Oh! Your majesty are you leaving already!? Please take this handkerchief with you, please take it!

Eh? You’re a hand towel kind a of person, so you don’t need it… Huuuuh!?

Take care (teary voice)

Gwendal’s SS: That’s admirable

If anything happens, report it, you may leave. Ah, close the door all the way.

Oh? Why are you going under the desk, Sandcolored-chan? I didn’t chee you in three days, so I wash very wowied.

Hn? What… what do you have with you? A kitten!?

Even though I hadn’t seen you in 3 days, suddenly you have a kitten!?

(image: えらいぞ That’s admirable.)

Furthermore… this isn’t a kitten, but a puppy!?

Even though you’re a cat you’re going to protect this small puppy?

I see, that’s admirable.

This child will certainly learn about life from the top of your sand colored back.

Now that I think about it, the man who taught me about life, wasn’t my blood related father…

Hey! Stop it, that’s my ear, no milk will come from it.

Anissina’s SS: Sounds good doesn’t it?

Zun-zun zunzurun-zunbazun

Out-of-nowhere Poison Lady,

Inescapable Poison Lady,

zunbazuun

(New Poison Lady Anissina Theme)

Young ladies, it’s going to be alright!

“Why” you ask?

Because I’m here!

What kind of harassment* are you experiencing? Illegitimate child*? Dessert Stomach rib cage*?

In that case, can I tell your boss? That’s OK isn’t it? Of course, sounds good doesn’t it?

(image:いいですね Sounds good doesn’t it?)

If a title determines a person’s value, then eventually a fool will be seen as bald**!

If it were me, I’d say something like this, but

if by any chance you’re the weak type that doesn’t say anything

then first, withdraw strategically to a safe place.

Then make sure to send the pigeons flying and wait for reinforcements.

You don’t have to fight alone.

Sounds good doesn’t it?

Eating through the dishes Poison Lady***

Too-straightforward Poison Lady

zunbazuun

Murata’s SS: Otsukaresama

Ehh, first, make sure the eggs don’t harden, and put them on the rice.

Ah, it’s me, it’s me. Where are you? Ah, you’re already in front of the apartment?

Just come upstairs and open the door: Hello! Sorry to make you wait! Otsukarechan!

I’m sorry, even though I forgot my smartphone, you brought it all the way to my house.

To say thank you, I made some fried rice, so let’s eat!

(image:お疲れさま -Otsukaresama- You must be tired/ Good job today)

Is it okay if we talk as we walk?

Oh, well it might look like I’m too dependent.

Dependence, it’s not that… maybe.

It’s not like I couldn’t uh, nh…. live without you.

Although when you’re not nearby, I’m afraid I may lose* you, and can’t relax.

So what I’m trying to say is

Otsukaresama, thank you for coming by.

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Note: lose as in die: “I’m afraid you might die”

Greta’s SS: Happy Halloween

Tonight is Haallooween!

Appy Appy Haallooween!

It sounds like French? Am I being praised? And who is French? Is it a guy?

As for me you know, I like both Shin Makoku’s Harouin and Earth’s Halloween.

Because if one collects dew early in the morning one can make a beautiful poison, and also because everyone’s baked ghost sweets are cute!

But because Yuuri always tells me a lot of stories, I also wanted to tell him stories about the festivals of the country where I was born… but I realized, I don’t know any…

So I just said congratulations and smiled, because now I’m going to infiltrate the “If you get lost, you’ll never come back Poison Lady Library”!

I’ll read a lot of stories about the festivals in Zorashia, so everyone please wait a little bit!

Yuuri’s SS: Good morning

GOOD MORNING!

Sorry for speaking so loudly. Doing that might ruin the early morning secret inspection.

So let me say it again in a soft voice, good morning.

It’s nice that the south side of the morning market is so lively, and there are so many food booth, each with delicious looking food.

Don’t worry, lately I’ve become a master at handling coins.

Huh, are you a salesperson?

So here’s the change…. and this is your part. We’ll divide it like this, you’re welcome.

(image: おはよう Good morning)

I think we should get a dog.

So instead of leaving like a ninja, I’d simply take the dog out for a walk, just like any dog person. Like in Saitama.

By the way, the day after tomorrow I’ll go to a tree planting site, but because it’s confidential, don’t tell anyone.

All right, see you!

This is also a secret matter,

I’m really happy I’ll get to say “Good morning” to you again tomorrow,

I’m really happy!

Wolfram SS: Welcome Home

Basically, I don’t wait.

At any rate, there’s no reason to wait, right?

Whether is a boat trip, a battlefield, or an enemy country, I’ll go with you.

To do that, I ended up sneaking into a wooden box, but even if I have that much strength and determination, and also because after all you’re a henachoko, when I leave you alone, I worry.

So just let Gunter who stays in the castle, have the role of the person who says “Welcome home” .

(image: Welcome home)

However, I can’t travel with you to ‘that world over there’.

Because if I push myself to go there, my nose will grow!

And not just my nose, but my chin will stretch, too; Anissina said so!

That’s why, only when you come to Shin Makoku from Earth….

only at that time, I will say to you, along with all the citizens of the country, from the bottom of my heart

“Welcome home”, I was waiting for you.

Saralegui SS: That’s really interesting, huh?

Even if you collect three of these cards with my image on them, you don’t win anything~!

What? Instead of that you want to hear about the next letter?

Pigeon sender: Lilit Latchie… you were a nice little pigeon weren’t you?

I can’t read the rest because of the poop on it.

Hmm, let’s see…“ How are you doing mother-in-law? Recently in the Blood Pledge Castle, there’s been a big commotion with His Majesty’s Toto*”

I wonder what that is? His Majesty’s Toto…

(image: That’s really interesting, huh?)

“Lord Weller’s popularity is still high, but His Excellency the Third Son’s attractiveness raising rate is causing great changes.”

When they say Lord Weller do they mean…. hn, That’s really interesting, huh?

Although this is indeed intelligence meant to reach Shin Makoku snatched from a pigeon, I wonder what kind of kid the new king of that country is?

I wonder what he likes, what he dislikes.

I look forward to meeting you New Maou.

I’m sure I’ll meet you soon.

———————————————

Note: Heika Toto-> “TOkubetsu TOkuguu yossou” in English “His Majesty’s Special Treatment Forecast”. However in translation, the pun is lost. Toto is the most famous toilet company in JP and saying “His Majesty’s Toto” sounds like saying “His Majesty’s toilet” to me and I find it hilarious every time.

Yuuri’ SS: I’m Home

When I go home to my family on earth, I say ‘I’m home’ right?

But I also return to Shin Makoku, so here I say “I’m home” as well.

But if I’m returning home, I should bring some souvenirs, right?

Weeeell, in regards to time on Earth, I return as soon as I leave though.

However, no matter where I go, I always return empty handed.

And even so, I’m always received by that smiling face. I’m truly such a lucky guy.

(image: “I’m home”)

But I’m sure some years ago… and even now, somewhere in the world, maybe even in a place nearby, there are people who couldn’t say “I’m home” and people who couldn’t say “Welcome home”.

So everyone who’s going home, please happily say “I’m home”, and I think it’d be great if everyone who waits for them could say “Welcome home” with a big smile.

You don’t need any souvenirs.

If you can safely hug them, that’s enough.

Jozak SS: Leave that to me

If a person alone has a super flashy hair color, they can be easily targeted, but in my case I think great! I’ll be your target.

Rather than bullying a cute new recruit, come and defeat me, Gurrier Jozak.

Because I’m the kind of man that when someone asks “Who’s going first?”

I say “ Leave that to me”.

But when I didn’t feel like shaving at all the Captain said, it’s fine if you know your place.

(image : “ Leave that to me”)

And that’s how this Gurie ended up affiliating to the “Old Men Wig Club*” sponsored by Mr. Hyscliff. Because it’s fun~! It’s convenient~! It’s cutting edge~!

I mean isn’t it lovely? Even without cutting this mazoku inherited hair

I can become a landlady, a shrine maiden, or a princess.

I can infiltrate any place!

All while keeping this sunset colored mane.

———————————————————

Note: Pun, Ossans’ Love (Ossan-> old men, Tsura-> Wig ; Bu-> Club –>Ossantsu Rabu)

Conrad SS: Good night

When I was near the border, a house had several ornamental altars, that welcomed the spirits of friends and family.

Outside several people dressed as skeletons were making a fuss.

It seems they had mixed Halloween and Day of the Dead.

Once the festival was done, the children would write letters to Santa Claus.

I believe that there’s a Santa.

As much as I believe that this country has a Maou.

(image: Good Night)

At any rate, kids may have found out about you.

Sooo, give me the letters and I’ll fill the bag, and then

I’ll have to come through the roof like an early Santa Claus.

I asked the palace guards to turn a blind eye, because I'm Santoku rosu*.

Once I give you this and greet you, I’ll go home.

Good night.

I wanted to say a night greeting.

I wanted to say it at night.

——————————————

Note: Pun of Santa Claus: Santoku rosu忖度ロース: Lit. Considerate Pork Loin

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