Editing A Simple Survey:Volume1 End3 (section)

===Part 4===

(How strange.)

He had that thought right after his afternoon class when he was thinking of heading to the supermarket to get a bento for dinner.

He owned a cell phone, but he did not have a smartphone. He had won a small mobile computer (that was about the size of a makeup pouch) at a drawing in the shopping district, so he had no need for another small device with which to access the internet.

The background wallpaper was set to a picture taken over summer break when he and a few others from his apartment complex had helped out some kids with a project. If he recalled correctly, it had been a water rocket for their middle school. As expected, everyone involved had ended up soaking wet. One of the people who had helped out, ''a white-haired girl of about 12'' had only moved in recently. He still had some contact with her over the phone, but he could never seem to contact her from his end for some reason.

Suddenly, a small red popup appeared in the bottom left side of the small screen.

It said the following:

''Malicious code “Int.worm/Gold_Stealer” detected.

''Resolving the situation.

''Click the report for details.

“…”

That in and of itself was not too strange. Actually getting infected by a computer virus was one thing, but anyone who had almost constant access to the internet was familiar with having one blocked.

The problem was the name.

Just as Anzai was feeling a bit uneasy, Kozue (who had approached him at some point) whispered in his ear.

“…What a familiar name.”

“Wah!?”

“What a familiar name. Gold Stealer. …Wasn’t that part of that professor’s survey? I believe it was in a story about a computer virus that looked like a kunoichi.”

“…Wait, do you even have a class in this building?”

“That is a trivial issue,” she said smoothly before pointing at the bottom left of the screen with her slender finger. “This is the bigger issue. What is that? I see a fairy and you get a computer virus…”

“No, wait. There’s no connection there…wait, is there?”

Anzai recalled that there had also been a small fairy dressed in green clothes in one of the short films from that professor’s survey. The story had been about creating a casket bed.

“But a fairy is like a ghost or a UFO. This is just a virus. In fact, the professor might have based that short film on a virus that actually exists.”

“I just did a search on my phone, but I could not find a single example of a virus called Gold Stealer. It keeps assuming I misspelled it and giving me other names to search for. It is pissing me off.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Anzai frowned. “There’s no official name for viruses anyway, right? That might just be what the security company calls it. Since the software detected it and is calling it Gold Stealer, the security company must call it that.”

“But I cannot find anything no matter how much I search.”

“What…?”

Anzai brought up the security software’s official site on his mobile computer and entered the virus name in the search box.

But it came up with 0 results.

“…Then what was that popup?”

“Yes, I wonder. Hee hee. It does not have quite the impact of the fairy I saw, but you could still call this an unexplainable absurd phenomenon. Hee hee.”

“Why are you looking so triumphant?”

“I-I am not looking triumphant!!”

“How suspicious. Did you send this to me to get me wrapped up in all this?”

“A ridiculous accusation! Are you using me as a scapegoat to keep your thoughts in the realm of the realistic!?”

“If you added it to the malware list in my security software, it would show a popup saying it had detected the Gold Stealer. That is much more realistic than thinking a virus that is like an AI out of a manga actually exists. And you are the only one who would benefit from this.”

“Nonsense! Utter nonsense!! Also, I find that super hacker-like ability you are suggesting to be much more absurd than a fairy!!”

Kozue continued to protest, but Anzai did not care. He put the mobile computer back in his bag and headed for the supermarket to buy a cheap meal.

However, the next oddity occurred as soon as he left the evening lecture hall and entered the hallway.

He saw arrows.

Colorful arrows stretched across the different routes through the hallway.

“…These were in the short films, too.”

“What now?”

“I think the arrows display the genre of your destiny. Like love comedy or horror.”

However, he refused to accept it.

(Wait, didn’t the story say you needed some kind of implant installed in your brain to see these!? That’s scary! I’ll never accept this is true!!)

Anzai’s brain denied it with all its might. It was similar to the thought pattern that led to late detection of cancer. His fear was getting in the way.

“I was asking how you were going to explain this absurd phenomenon.”

“S-someone painted them on as a prank. Look, it’s so obvious on that red arrow.”

“That arrow looks black to me.”

“Then you must be crazy.”

“That I cannot accept! Do not lower your estimation of me to explain this realistically!!”

“I don’t believe in it, so this doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter which arrow I follow. It’s just a coincidence if I happen to follow the pink love comedy arrow!!” shouted Anzai as he ran full speed down the hallway.

But the next oddity was waiting for him not even 15 seconds later.

Rounded, goat-like horns.

Thin, bat-like wings.

A pointed, arrow-like tail.

A little girl with all those things and wearing a leather outfit cut across the hallway.

“Wh-what the heeeeeeeeeeeellllllllllllllllllllllllll!!!???”

He had seen her before.

She had been in the short film about the hero and the demon king.

But because of what that would mean, the logical part of Anzai’s mind rejected it completely.

This was not a computer virus or a brain implant. It was pure fantasy. A different sort of feeling of rejection assaulted him.

“What now?” asked Kozue. At some point, she had become the questioner. “How will you describe the absurd phenomenon you see before your very eyes?”

“A theatre club?”

“I see you are keeping things nice and safe. But how did they make the wings move so much like a real living creature’s?”

“Ehh? W-was it really all that realistic? I thought it looked like styrofoam…heh…eh heh heh…”

“Now you are altering your memories because there is no footage to prove you wrong!?”

After that, they ran across a carnivorous plant so large it could likely swallow a human whole, a kunoichi with SF technology, a jealous Japanese goddess, a stubborn sushi chef, and other absurdities. However, Anzai would not accept them. He refused to accept them. With that desperate mindset, Anzai found a way to realistically explain away each and every one of them. He was afraid of accepting even one of them because he felt he would be dragged into some fantastical alternate world if he did.

In exasperation, Kozue said, “I think it is unfair to explain any of them away with ‘special makeup’. You have used that explanation for most of them.”

“If only it was video footage, then I could claim it was CG. Seeing it in person is a pain in the ass.”

“You may be able to get by each individual one like this, but can you explain how it all fits together. Why would the theatre club be dressed up in special makeup and acting en masse to trick you?”

“Uuh…!? U-um…”

“If you cannot explain that, then your theories lose some credibility. Hee hee. And then you will have to believe me about the fairy I saw. Hee hee.”

“M-maybe this is all part of that professor’s plan and this is part of a continuing psychological experiment centered around that survey.”

“Oh?”

“Or maybe this kind of thing happens frequently around the professor, so he made short films based on them to look for any mental changes in the viewers or to see how well they could withstand-…Ah!?”

“I see. Hee hee.”

“No! That doesn’t deny the premise!! These absurdities don’t exist! They just don’t!! Basing the short films on something that doesn’t exist doesn’t explain this! The easiest explanation would be to say you’re behind all of it, Kozue!!”

“Would you please stop placing me in the villain’s role whenever you run out of ideas!?”

Anzai forced himself to focus on the realistic goal of a supermarket bento, so he had no choice but to deny all of those psychedelic digressions. He had a feeling the fact that he “had no choice” but to deny it meant he was cornered, but he did not want to face it all head on.

If he did, he had a feeling his brain would be overcome by eccentric thought patterns like “The neighborhood cat has been a bit unfriendly of late → Is it related to the sinking of the lost continent of Mu!? →Japan is in danger of sinking!!”

That was why he had to deny it all.

He could feel something crumbling at the edges of his explanations, but he still had to deny it all.

He was pretty sure that demon king’s wings were not made of styrofoam, but he had to deny it all.

Anzai (and Kozue who was following him for some reason) finally made it outside the school building. However…

“What now?”

“…”

Anzai felt a great blast of air.

However, it was not the wind blowing. It was the flow of air created by a giant object moving. Anzai felt the same feeling on his cheek as when a subway train approached the station.

It was caused by…

What Anzai saw walking between the buildings beyond the campus was…

“How do you explain that?”

“…It only appeared for an instant.”

“How do you deny that?”

“It appeared for an instant in the story involving a magical girl and heroes wearing tights! It’s hard to tell what this is!! It would have been easier if it had simply been the magical girl!!”

“That certainly looks like a giant combining robot to me. I can think of no other way to describe it.”

“…”

The robot looked their way with the sound of whirring motors.

It looked as if it would soon head for the university campus.

He had to explain it.

Any explanation would do. Special makeup, a mass of cardboard boxes, or maybe a new weapon from the JSDF. He just had to come up with any reason at all that he was mistaken in thinking what he saw was (something like) a giant robot 20 meters tall walking his way.

“I do not see how you can explain this.”

“No, I can do it!! In a way, I want to deny giant robots more than fairies!! If it’s real, there are endless questions about its design like why something that big would be walking on two legs, so denying it has to be simpler!!”

“I still do not see how you can do so. I am going to run away, but I will tell you the quickest method of denying it.”

“What is it?”

“Let it step on you. If it does not crush you, you have proof that it is made of cardboard boxes or styrofoam. Then I am sure you can easily deny that giant robot.”

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