Editing CubexCursedxCurious:Volume16 Chapter3 (section)

===Part 6===

Fear was standing in a dark room.

The sensation under her body felt like a futon. Kirika had laid it out when transporting her here. Kirika had remained silent without saying a word. In the end, she left the room after touching her corner lightly. Kirika was very gentle when putting her down.

However, she had no spare mental energy to thank Kirika for her kindness.

All she could do was think the whole time&mdash;What should be done?

She was cursed.

Indeed. Precisely because she was cursed, precisely because she was something cursed...

For centuries, that was why she had been pondering that question.

In other words&mdash;Should she ''not exist''?

(...)

She recalled that man. The Lord of the Knights Dominion, Trinac Agana. In the far depths of her memories, there really seemed to be an alchemist standing next to the castle lord. Her&mdash;creator.

Throughout the long years, truly, these were long years, she had even forgotten his existence. She also wanted to forget. But under completely unexpected circumstances, she encountered him again. Even now, she still found it quite unbelievable.

Even that kind of man.

Even her own creator had asserted that her existence was a mistake and wanted to destroy her.

Expressed even more explicitly&mdash;

Having obtained eternal life from a cursed spear, that man had chosen to gather and destroy objects like her. In other words, that man was driven by willpower of such firm extent, with the conviction that his viewpoint was the absolute truth.

In contrast, she&mdash;

"...!"

Her invisible throat choked and convulsed.

It was really impossible to refute him and prove him wrong. Because&mdash;

''His'' left hand. The smell of seawater. The odor of blood. Wet clothing. The number of missing fingers.

&mdash;She... had harmed Haruaki. This one point was indisputable truth.

As long as she was herself, this risk would continue to exist forever.

Her birth, this form of hers, the fact that she was a cube for torture and execution, impossible to change. Precisely because of that, that man had rejected her existence. After all, she was created with danger as a requirement, how could she possibly not be dangerous?

(What should... I do...?)

She needed the Indulgence Disks after all? The only countermeasure to suppress her mechanisms.

But her unease still could not be dispelled completely.

Having accepted Honatsu's gift, almost sealing up all her mechanisms, leaving only one.

In spite of that, in spite of this current state of hers, she had still harmed Haruaki.

Taking all this into account&mdash;Even if all Indulgence Disks were inserted, there was no guarantee that the madness in her heart would disappear, right?

No one knew what could happen. She definitely would not be able to conjure tools of torture, but even so, that was no guarantee against going berserk. If something like the incident on the ship happened again, she might want to kill the enemy before her, even if it meant hitting people barehanded, stealing other's weapons or biting with her teeth. Then in her mindless state, she might kill a certain precious person or tear apart a certain precious person's throat.

Although this was just imagination, she was quite convinced it could happen. As soon as she thought of the density of the darkness in her heart, as soon as she recalled how her creator had asserted she was a mistake and that her existence was steeped in sin...

Ahhh, I knew it.

Then&mdash;

The easiest and safest method.

The only choice left was disappearing herself&mdash;

"Fear-in-Cube, can we chat in whispers?"

"!"

Without warning, a certain person's quiet voice was heard in the dark room.

Fear's entire body tensed up. This was&mdash;Yamimagari Pakuaki's voice. However, there were no signs of anyone else in this room with all the lights off. Only sound was coming from somewhere.

"You guys were quite busy earlier, right? That's why I took the opportunity to enter the house for a bit, to install a two-way speaker in your room during the chaos.  In other words, just in case... Although talking through a speaker without seeing each other's face is a bit rude, considering the current situation, I really can't believe optimistically that I can evade Muramasa and Kotetsu's surveillance to hold a secret conversation with you directly, so please forgive me. As long as we don't speak too loudly, they shouldn't notice."

"What is... your aim?"

"I told you, right? A chat in whispers. I've got something to tell just you."

"Just like what you did to Kirika... If you think you can trick me with some kind of weird deal and manipulate me to your whims&mdash;"

"The complete opposite. I want to ''stop you from abandoning all action''. Because at this rate, it looks like you're giving up on doing anything. That'd be a bit boring."

"...!"

Perhaps hearing her gasp, Pakuaki chuckled.

"What I want to tell you is very simple. The last Indulgence Disk is in your creator's hands."

"What!?"

"More precisely, it is inside Dainsleif&mdash;the magic sword he had obtained during his wanderings across the world&mdash;who then became the most ancient knight."

"Dain...? You mean Sleif?"

"Indeed. From her standpoint, it matters not what you guys want to call her."

Fear recalled the maiden knight who wore a visor-like helmet. If she was one of their kind&mdash;a cursed sword&mdash;having an Indulgence Disk install inside her would not be strange for sure.

"You... know what Indulgence Disks are?"

"Dear me, have you forgotten what kind of organization I'm the leader of? Unknowns&mdash;"

"Cut the crap and just tell me if you know."

Pakuaki exhaled as though speechlessly but continued without making a fuss:

"Indulgence Disks&mdash;You guys think it's "a device for lightening curses," right? But strictly speaking, they're not. That's just a secondary effect. They have another, original purpose."

"What is it?"

"Do you need to ask? ''Namely, to seal your mechanisms. Those things were originally limiters existing to restrict your actions''."

If anything&mdash;

She had already sensed this vaguely&mdash;a very long time ago.

Those slots of hers which were the perfect fit for Indulgence Disks, as well as the few Disks that were inside her from the start... There was a clear difference between her and other cursed tools where Indulgence Disks had been forcibly installed. The level of unity was also different. Among them, there was Aiko, a former member of the Knights Dominion, who also had a device installed to reduce curses while acting as a life collateral system to prevent betrayal&mdash;called Euthanasia, right?&mdash;Compared to that kind of forced mishmash, it was like the difference between heaven and earth.

"In other words.... Like me, the Indulgence Disks were created by that man too?"

"Indeed. To match your design of transforming into thirty-two mechanisms, he also made thirty-two limiters. But naturally, the customer ordered your creation because he wanted to use you, so after receiving the goods, he took out almost all of the Indulgence Disks. By the way, even I have no idea how to take out an Indulgence Disk and put it back in. Since it's related to your core and of a black box design, I don't think anything as convenient as an eject button would exist there. I'm guessing that only the Dominion Lord, Trinac Agana himself, has the know-how to make modifications."

Removal. Asking the enemy for a favor to remove them, in order to fight the enemy. Clearly scared of losing control, yet still wanting to liberate more combat abilities. What paradoxical behavior. Too ludicrous.

"The few that were kept inside you from the beginning... Perhaps those mechanisms were too unstable to use, or too dangerous, or just didn't match the customer's tastes. Anyway, I think they were sealed to prevent mechanisms from malfunctioning."

"..."

"Feeling regret for his past actions, he probably still had many Indulgence Disks on hand during his wanderings. This is the reason why many of the Knights Dominion's possessions have them installed. That being said, many of the Disks were lost outside throughout the years."

Probably because the explanation basically ended, Pakuaki's voice went silent for a while.

Indulgence Disks. Originally kept inside her, created for her, devices for sealing her mechanisms.

But conversely, it meant that the Indulgence Disks were not meant to lessen the curses branded upon her body by the numerous victims when she was used as a tool of torture and execution, right?

New unease. Unchanging unease.

"I understand that Indulgence Disks existed for my sake from the start. But so what? Even if all the Indulgence Disks were gathered and the last one inserted inside me to seal all the mechanisms, the curses surrounding me won't necessarily go away. I might turn to using my hands, teeth or nails to fight in a frenzy, then hurt someone important again&mdash;"

"Oh, you don't need to worry about that."

Pakuaki said with absolute confidence.

Without forcefulness, without seeming like he was lying, he spoke as though this was only natural.

Fear stared wide-eyed with her invisible eyes, looking up with her invisible face. The room was still all dark inside and she did not know where Pakuaki's speaker was installed.

Fear asked in a trembling voice:

"R-Really...?"

"Of course."

Then he told her the reason.

Somehow, in a tone of voice that almost seemed to conjure the image of him giggling&mdash;

"''Because''&mdash;"


......

............

..................


Then&mdash;


"...Haha."

Fear made a hoarse sound from her throat. She laughed.

She could only laugh.

If she were in human form, the result might be different. Perhaps something might slide from the corner of her eye. A momentary impulse. However, surely, at least she was certain she would show a smile. Hence, she was aware that this was right.

Only one thing was certain.

If that were done, she would never hurt anyone again.

Indeed beyond a doubt.

"Why... are you telling me this? Doesn't it contradict what you said earlier?"

"Hmm, frankly speaking&mdash;"

His tone was lively, which actually made Fear feel that he was speaking from the heart.

"I believe that things to research about you have almost been exhausted. This is the final unknown left that I'd like to see with my own eyes."

To the point that the Lab Chief's Nation's leader, whose only interest lay in turning unknowns into knowns, would say something like this&mdash;

She was currently at the culminating point, she had this feeling.

She also felt like laughing now.

At this moment, Fear noticed a presence outside the room.

"...Someone's coming."

"Oh. That's pretty much all I wanted to say at the moment. I will be retreating now..."

Pakuaki's voice was not heard again after that.

Footsteps were gradually approaching along the corridor. That rhythm was very familiar.

Hence, Fear quietly waited for that person to open the room's sliding door.

Several seconds later&mdash;

"...Hi, are you awake?"

"...Yeah."

Just as expected, before her eyes was his usual smile.

The instant she saw it, her heart overflowed with the same feeling as just now.

She wanted to laugh a bit.

At the same time, she wanted to cry a bit too.