Kore wa Zombie desu ka?:Volume 1 Chapter 1

Chapter 1 – "What I like is the Tsubamegaeshi secret sword technique. My special skill is the Tsubamegaeshi secret sword technique. My hobby is the Tsubamegaeshi secret sword technique."

I came to this dirty world in order to exterminate Megalos, but my magical powers have been taken away by that sketchy guy. The situation can't be any worse. Though I wanted to send him flying, I restrained myself to do so, and thus decided to only kick him to make him become a star. However, I didn't think that a B-level Megalo bear would be beaten up by him in just one strike......could it be that he's the rumoured devilish baron?! It...it's possible.

When I opened up my eyes, math class had already ended. The next class has started without me noticing. Also, this class is almost finished too...

I glanced on my left. The curtains of the window were swinging from the wind. Probably because of this torrid weather, the window was opened. Though I don't know who did it, nice curtains. As I was thinking about this, the bell rang to mark the end of the class.

Next is—eh, is it already noon? Bento, bento.

What I took out was a hand-made bento. The one who made this bento – I don't need to hide that – is actually Haruna-chan. Yes, it is the genius-bishoujo-devilish-baron.

"I have a lot of confidence in my omelettes!" she said, while preparing the food with a sense of triumph.

Hehe. I put on the greatest zombie smile and lifted the bento's cover. Instantly, my already dead facial muscles spasmed......

The end has already been decided. I've got that premonition since the beginning.

"Please forgive me."

I muttered while bracing my myself. If it's like this, rice would be better. Pure white rice would be better.

In my bento box, there was only a yellow colour.

"I have a lot of confidence in my omelettes!"

I only know that. However, you are overconfident. It's only omelettes.

What is this green plastic separation made for? At the very least, it wasn't to make something like a ranch fence around the omelettes.

"Aikawa. It's really surprising to see you with a normal bento......"

Over there, a man appeared. His name is Orito. He has tea-coloured spiky hair and wears glasses, and was just an annoying classmate that you see everywhere.

His height and weight is just like any other normal person, his face is also ordinary, and he's not someone with any special trait. He probably understood the latter, and thus decided to have a trademark of his own—that spiky hair. This ill-fated relationship started since daycare, and he's a bothersome guy who always hangs around me.

"Waa......"

Orito saw my bento and was surprised.

Please, don't look at me with that compassionate expression in your eyes that you use to look at dead animals.

"Didn't you take that joke too far? It's so far that I can't even laugh at it."

Shaking his head, Orito dragged the chair beside me, and opened the very ordinary bento on my desk.

"I, simply really like omelettes."

While explaining that, I prepare myself to take a bite—but I didn't have chopsticks.

Hey, hey, why would you commit such a low-level mistake, devilish baron. I'm lucky to have here a pair of one-use chopsticks from the supermarket.

"Hn? What is it?"

"Since when it started? Aikawa never said such things as he'd eat at his seat."

That's because you'd still eat beside me no matter how many times I said that, so I've given up.

"Then, you can go eat at your seat. I want to eat alone. Please don't come."

"Well, what's wrong with that."

For some reason he showed a satisfied smile. Aaah, he's really a troublesome guy.

In the back of the classroom, I took out a pair of chopsticks from the closets that no one locked, and started my battle with the yellow demon in front of my eyes.

How scary. Even though after I've become a zombie I've battled with many types of creatures, compared to them, that's really scary. I get the feeling that something will happen for sure. I plunged my chopsticks into it. I took a deep breath, grabbed a piece and swallowed it in one shot.

"Hmm!"

I unconsciously let out a weird voice.

Delicious! How can it be so delicious!? It's so good as if the cosmos were in my mouth. Is that person a premium cooking chef? I didn't even know that something that simple could touch me to that point.

But—Ah.

I don't need the amount to fill a bento. Plus, since it's so good I long for rice even more. Even tears were almost coming out of my eyes, and for many reasons. The eyes of a zombie can still shed tears.

—That is why I proposed something.

"Hey, Orito. I now hold some really amazing omelettes. Trade with me, even if it's just a bit, for that Japanese spirit."

"Ha? You should have said that you wanted some rice from the beginning. Don't put up that kind of dumb—"

Though he got angry there, he still traded with me.

Taking that omelette which feels like a silver river inside of his mouth, Orito opened his eyes wide.

"What is this!" And he stood up, facing me.

"Hey! Aikawa's omelettes are too amazing! It seems that you can trade it now for rice."

Hey, hey. Orito-kun. Don't do such a rash thing. Zombies are beings who really love peaceful lives.

After hearing this, some people walked towards us. Alas, it can't be helped. The quantity of omelettes is stupidly great. It's not as if I can't share with you guys.

Though I thought of this at the beginning, there was a hot spectacular event of "Aikawa's ultimate omelettes", and before I noticed it, the yellow-cloured bento has become full of rice. And it was filled with every kind of taste.

It's true that I've said just before that "Compared to that, pure white rice is better", but it's really sad.

I didn't think that the greatest simple thing in this century would be traded into rice.

However, I didn't say "Why did it turn out like this".

Seeing the schoolgirls put on a smiling face and saying "Delicious, delicious", how can I say such a thing?

Even if it was a game or a movie, occasionally zombies can read the atmosphere, right?

—That is the same for me.

The afternoon classes calmly ended.

......Though I've slept through them.

After noon, that sun was quite foul. I thought that I'd die, really. Now I'll wait until the sun entirely falls before going back home.

I turned my gaze to the schoolyard under the sunset. The track and field team was running around on the orange field like kids playing in a park. What is there to be happy with? Everyone's vibrant smiles seem to be overflowing. Looking at the girls on the field, I hold an immense respect for the one who invented bloomers.

Now, there was basically no student in the classroom. Every time, it's just me and Orito who leave last. The ordinary students who are living their life of youth, left the classroom while smiling.

Orito is also getting ready to go home, placing the bag on his back, he yawned deeply.

"Aikawa. Speaking of which, you seem to go home very late. What are you doing at school?"

"Sleeping."

"You still plan to sleep even after sleeping that much?"

Orito patted my back while laughing. Though that is called sleep, it's rather falling from a battle with the sun......they're all the same.

"My house is nearby, so it's alright. There are many murder cases in these times, right? Shouldn't you be careful?"

So YOU are worried about me. Hehe, I laughed a bit with my nose. There are indeed some frequent dismembering murder cases in the past few days. It is probably done by the same person.

Plus, I was also killed by him. Right now, I'm the victim.

"Though I want to meet the murderer."

"Oh right, I almost forgot. Talking about meeting someone, Aikawa, my little sister's friend is also a victim in the serial murder case. She's called Kyoko-chan. Do you know her?"

Eh—Eh? There's a survivor? Hey, hey. She's a survivor from the serial murder case? Well, I should also be counted as one too.

"I don't know her name. What kind of kid is she?"

"As for the age, she's 14, just like my little sister. She's slightly taller than the average middle schooler, but she has the face of a child. Her chest is very big. She's many times cuter than my little sister.

"I don't know her. That, does Kyoko-chan want to see me for something?"

"Hehe, Aikawa doesn't know, but Kyoko-chan knows about you. That means that it's love at first sight."

Hehe. Exposing a smile like an idiot. The pair of eyes behind those glasses are the ones of a pervert.

"Isn't it way too one-sided if you only rely on that point."

"I don't even know how many things Kyoko-chan asked about you......she's in love with you for sure! She's a middle school girl who lost both of her parents, and want to meet with the man she loves. Don't you understand~ can you go meet her at least once, please?"

How can there be anyone as bothersome as that guy. To join both of his hands while showing that kind of smile makes me really want to send you flying twenty meters away. No, it actually doesn't matter. I need clues. Clues about the murder cases are there.

"It's perfectly okay. I also hold some interest in this kid."

"......Aikawa......you are, as I thought, a lolicon."

"I'm not one for sure. I don't have any interest towards her in a sexual way. Rather, why don't you make a move?"

"Hey, Aikawa, don't put me in the same category as you. I, on the other hand, prefer mature women."

"How should I tell you that even though I'm in the flat-chested faction, I'm not a lolicon."

"I got it. I got it. Don't be so serious about it. Lolicon."

"Fine. Now, tell me the thing you love the most in the world—I'll transform it to the best that I can."

"In short, you can even meet her today if you want to."

"I got it. I'll meet her tomorrow at dusk."

"Speaking of which, why didn't I come to your house the past few days, Aikawa? Even though I always came there in the past."

I don't remember calling you over even once......hey, hey, don't think of any strange things.

"It has been long since I've come, can I go visit it today?"

You see. I know that it'd be like this—it'd be a headache. If you'd came here now, it'd be a headache. NO, not just now, but it'd always be a headache from now on.

"It's not possible. That......there are many important things I have to do. It's not easy to live by yourself, I'm really busy."

Is there something wrong? If you ask that question then I won't be able to say something back.

"Then it can't be helped......"

Orito looked through the window with a lonely expression. The happy voices of the sweating highschoolers in their club activities came from outside.

"I'm sorry. Right, how about going bowling next time? There's no way that you can beat me now."

Because I'm a zombie? I said that kind of voice out in my head.

"Fine! It has been long since we've place a comic book as wager! Let's go tomorrow!"

Rotating his wrist, Orito started to laugh in the corner of his mouth. That guy really loves bowling.

Just like this, we've casually chattered like this for a bit, and Orito left the classroom first. After hearing the footsteps completely disappear, I gazed again throughout the window.

The sky, dyed by the colour of dusk......I didn't continue on what I was about to say. I've already encountered that kind of situation, I guess.

Haa, what a good whether. Go eat shit. Sun, quickly fall and go eat shit.

Suddenly, I felt that the lights flashed for an instance, and it was followed by an ear-piercing noise due to the windows which broke, and it seemed that something entered the classroom. You'd understand if you look at it closely. It was a lobster. Wearing the school uniform, and slightly taller than an average person—WOW, THAT GUY'S REALLY BIG!

"I felt the magical energy of a masou shoujo and thus came her to see......"

The lobster shoved down the shards of the broken windows with his pliers, and furtively looked around in the classroom. Then, he fixed me with his cute little eyes.

"Masou—Shoujo......?"

It seemed that he inclined his head due to his astonishment. He's really full of human smell.

"Who are you? There are quite a few male masou-shoujos. Plus, your magical energy is really low. You, are you really a masou-shoujo?"

"Though I want to deny this, I guess I still count as a masou-shoujo."

"......Anyway, there are many responses in this area. I'm looking forward to that."

How is that called? The term use for these guys.

"Hn? There's one that is moving towards here......good timing. I can kill two masou-shoujos.

Oh, yeah, it's "megalo". The term used for these guys. I really remembered it.

At this time, beside the slowly drifting curtains, she appeared.

She was wearing a T-shirt and a pair of trousers. With a chainsaw in her hand, Haruna appeared in the opened windows.

With the track court tainted by dusk as background, with her shirt and ahoge swaying in the wind. How magical and comical was her posture.

"Ayumu! What the heck are you doing! Beat the megalo until it pisses in his pants in terror!"

I don't know what would be the state where he "pisses in his pants in terror". Rather why did Haruna enter the scene like this?

"Haha! Another wrong guess! I can only wait for the ones left...after I kill you two."

The lobster bastard clicked his pliers, emitted a lively laugh. You're Baltan or what. Ah, the shape of the pliers is different. (T/N: Baltan from Ultraman. Google it if you don't know who he is.)

"Ayumu, finish him quickly! Wait, hey! Don't look here!"

Just like what the clearly angry Haruna asked, I faced the lobster standing on a chair. It seems that the reason why Haruna is blushing is because she feels incredibly embarrassed at the fact that her panties have been seen. If it's like this, then why did you go outside in this outfit? You fellow.

"Rather, what would the classroom become?"

"Ha. Something like that can also be fixed, because I'm a masou-shoujo."

"Then I can be in peace. First, that's a lobster, right?"

"Yes, that guy's an AA-class megalo, the lobster-mage."

That guy's a mage? I can't tell that by looking.

"Ah, no. Isn't it rather a super-evil outrageous lobster?"

"Hahaha! Then, let's begin!"

Suddenly, a warm wind came from the lobster.

From the looks, it seemed only to be a huge fart. Why did it do that? The disgusting purple wind seemed to be surrounding my body. Then, Haruna let out a low-pitched "Eh" and embraced herself. After receiving that wind, she should have felt a disgusting feeling, just like me, I guess.

"What, this is......impossible."

"What is it? Are you OK?"

"Ayumu......that feeling of numbness is......"

The lobster took a step close to us. Haruna shut her eyes tightly, and her shoulders were shaking.

"You, could it be that you're scared?"

"What,what kind of joke was that! The possibility that I, would be scared of megalos......how can it be—"

At this moment, Haruna stopped talking. She suddenly felt strenghtless, and immediately sat on the ground. A ripple appeared on her glabella, and while clenching her teeth, she tried the hardest possible to control her shaking.

Anyway, I should first cut down the distance, and just like with the bear last time, the goal is the lobster's head.

However, before my hand could grasp the lobster's head, it already fell on the floor, bleeding.

"Oho? You are more capable that you look......male masou-shoujo!"

With his large pliers covering his eyes, it was laughing.

"Ayumu!"