CubexCursedxCurious:Volume7 Chapter1

Chapter 1 - Hello Guillotine

Part 1

One evening on a certain weekend.

"Haruaki, I'm bored out of my mind! I wanna take a walk outside!"

Fear was saying this after one of the common sense lectures conducted whenever there was time—today's being "How to Use the Vacuum Cleaner, Lecture #3 ~The accessory with the pointy tip is not an item for stabbing people to death~"—had ended for some time. Earlier, she had been obediently watching an animal show on television, but now that the show had ended, she seemed to be bored with nothing to do.

Haruaki was in the kitchen preparing dinner. Making a surprised expression, he looked back at her and said:

"Since you're bored, then try finding something to do... Such as helping out with the cooking or the like?"

"I've done that before! How should I put this? I'm not in the mood for helping with cooking right now—That's right! I believe I should broaden my experiences!"

"You make a fair point... But I'm busy cooking right now, so I can't leave the kitchen."

"Why not leave the cooking to Cow Tits?"

Fear swayed her silver hair with displeasure. Standing beside Haruaki, helping out industriously with the cooking, Konoha looked up and said:

"Eh—But Haruaki-kun's cooking still tastes better. Right, if you say you 'don't mind it's not Haruaki-kun's cooking and you want to eat my cooking no matter what!' then I don't mind."

"Muumuu... Hmph, who wants to eat your cooking of full meaty hell? That'll cause the fatal disease that they call m-metabolic syndrome on television. That said, one person already caught it already. Poor thing, there's no hope for her at all..."

"W-Why are you looking at me with eyes filled with tepid eyes?"

The usual back and forth bickering began as always. But at this moment, Fear spoke as though she suddenly had an idea:

"But after more thinking, it's not like I need to have Haruaki by my side. I can manage something as trivial as taking a walk by myself. After all, I'm just going to make one round encircling this house. So can I go for a walk? I can? Okay~ Then I'm off!"

"Hey~ Hold it right there."

"Ooph!"

In any case, Haruaki grabbed her collar first and began to think. Counting from the day this girl was suddenly sent here, quite a few weeks had passed already. Although she was still doing many weird things as always, compared to the beginning, she had already improved greatly. Also, she had started going to school from a while earlier, so she seemed to be slowly getting used to things outside of the house...

Hmm~

Still grabbing onto her collar, Haruaki turned Fear's petite body around and looked her straight in the face.

"Hey, Haruaki you dummy! Let go now, or else I'll curse you!"

"So, you said you want to go for a walk no matter what?"

"Umm—Of course!"

Grumbling, Fear was showing glimmering eyes while nodding vigorously.

"Do you promise that you'll return after making one round in the neighborhood?"

"Yes!"

"Promise you won't run off to somewhere strange?"

"Yes yes!"

"Even if a weirdo calls out to you, you won't pay any attention?"

"Yes yes yes!"

"Then go."

"...! I'll be back before you know it!"

Fear rushed out of the kitchen, leaving only silence behind. Dressed in an apron, Konoha frowned slightly and said:

"Is this okay?"

"After all, she said she's only making one round in the neighborhood. Besides, I can't stay by her side forever, right?"

"Sigh... Well, I just hope she'll return without incident..."

Still feeling worried, Konoha murmured then continued preparing the meal. Her attitude prompted an ominous premonition to suddenly emerge in Haruaki's mind, but it was too late by this point. There should be no problem, right? There must not be a problem, please, no problems... As much as these worries gradually increased in his mind, Haruaki still picked up the kitchen knife again.

However—Based on the result...

Fear's walk this time was precisely the root cause of the later commotion.

Part 2

During dinner in the living room...

"U-Umm, Haruaki, can I eat in my room today?"

"What? Definitely no way. It's a different matter if you're living in the accessory dwelling, but we're living in the same home after all. So long as you're not ill in bed, having meals together is one of this family's rules."

"Muu... No exceptions?"

"Why do you want to eat in your room so much?"

"N-Nothing, okay! It's not like... I particularly... wanna... eat in... my room. Also, I only asked because the thought suddenly occurred to me. In fact, there's no special meaning! Wahaha!"

Fear laughed in a clearly unnatural manner then reached out with her chopsticks towards the dishes on the table.

(Hmm... Her behavior is too suspicious.)

Haruaki did not know when exactly she had returned from her walk. After coming home, she had stayed cooped up in her room doing something secretly. Even when he asked her how she felt about her walk, she simply replied with a weird answer of "N-Nothing much, not especially good or bad!" Having gone off on her walk with such enthusiasm, Haruaki expected her to report back happily on various sundry happenings.

"Muu, oh right."

Picking at the dishes as though distracted in thought, Fear suddenly looked up. Her glimmering eyes seemed to be saying "eureka!" Then she said:

"Midnight snack. That's right, I want a midnight snack. Haruaki, roll some rice balls!"

"Hmm? Oh, I can't for today. We don't have much rice left and the amount remaining is barely enough for breakfast tomorrow... You should eat your fill now during dinner so that you don't need a midnight snack."

"Also, why don't you sleep earlier instead of staying up late?"

"M-Muuuuuu..."

Fear's whimpers of displeasure only increased Haruaki and Konoha's doubts.

Then after dinner ended, it was time for tea.

Like a lawyer raising an objection to a judge, Fear knocked on the table and said:

"I demand double the usual amount of rice crackers for today's tea time snack! Four pieces! I want four!"

"What? Don't you have your own personal rice crackers in your room?"

"I finished them long ago! So I need to get the amount I will be eating next!"

"Didn't I give you a pack yesterday? I told you not to consume them too quickly."

"That's because, umm, there's an unpredicted situation... No! In any case, that's what I demand!"

Konoha sipped tea calmly while throwing a slanted glance at Fear's desperate pleading.

"Haruaki-kun, you must not give in to her demands no matter what. Otherwise, she'll simply keep asking for more."

"Well said. So you'll just have to make do with two. Here you go."

"What!?"

Receiving the two rice crackers, Fear was shaking with her head bowed, her silver hair quivering—

"Damn it, whatever! You dummy!"

She rushed out of the living room in a huff. As her inexplicable shouts of "The shameless brat is struck with shameless disease! Cow Tits' boobs are such an eyesore, they should deflate—" gradually receded, the sound of a paper door slamming shut was heard last.

"...What's with her? Although it's completely normal for her to be begging for rice crackers, today's behavior is a bit strange."

"So true~ But that child acting weird is also commonplace. Logically speaking, there is no problem."

Konoha looked exasperated as she poured tea into her cup. At that moment, she eyed her own bosom.

"...That child always says that... Could it really come true...?"

"What's the matter?"

"Eh? Umm, uh... Hmm! This is a good chance, I guess I'll muster my courage to try asking."

"Okay."

"Umm... My bosom, is it... really... an eyesore...?"

"Pffft!"

What kind of senseless question was that? Haruaki desperately tried to stop tea from spurting out of his mouth but could not stop his gaze from being drawn to "that part" while Konoha's body twisted from embarrassment. The way she cradled her bosom with her arms caused that body part to look even more magnificent—

"No! Actually... it's not... an eyesore. I think... it's quite nice. Not an eyesore at all."

Konoha's face suddenly flushed red, then she awkwardly shook her braids.

"Is that so... Aha, I seem to have asked something weird. Please erase this from your memory and pretend I never asked."

"O-Okay. I also find my answer quite weird, so please forget it as well..."

As though trying to hide her embarrassment, Konoha drank her tea in one breath. But then she suddenly frowned, causing Haruaki to ask: "Did something happen?"

"No... I seem to be hearing something strange. Perhaps it's just my imagination."

Konoha answered in her gentle smile as usual. Then saying "Okay, I must work even harder," she stood up. After Haruaki asked in puzzlement: "What do you need to work harder at?", Konoha replied:

"Because the teacher assigned a whole pile of homework that needs to finished quickly by Monday, unless I divide it up to work on for today and tomorrow, it'll be quite tough... Haruaki-kun, didn't your class get homework?"

Part 3

A couple dozen minutes later, Haraki was clutching his head, agonizing before his desk in his room.

"Gah, I can't believe I forgot all about it...!"

Clearly, he could not ask the teacher to reduce his homework load using excuses such as "My father never came back after going abroad, meaning I must do all the house work. If I had to mention another thing, there's a silver-haired girl living in my home." What a pain, what a great pain. In Haruaki's view, homework was contemptible for taking away time from important house chores.

(I'll need to finish this handout by today. I need to go shopping tomorrow and it's quite rare for me to feel motivated enough to clean the entire house thoroughly.)

Haruaki's grades were neither great nor terrible. But the enemy known as "formulae" was quite formidable, halting the advance of his homework progress.

"Hmm, I don't get this. I'd better ask Konoha...? No wait, she's quite strict about homework~ Looks like I should try my best on my own... But still... I... don't... get it..."

Just as Haruaki was hunching forward, feeling his strength drained, he thought "No way, I'm gonna fall asleep if this continues" and stretched. Suddenly, the paper door behind him shook. Someone was knocking. Haruaki casually answered "Come in."

"Umm... Is it okay if I come in?"

It was Fear. Haruaki glanced back at the sound of the paper door sliding open and saw her standing there with a timid look. Shoulder hunched, hands behind her back, she gingerly looked towards him.

"I'm quite tied up but whatever. Anyway, it won't affect my progress that much."

"Okay... Then I'm coming in."

"Sure, what's up?"

Thinking "she's probably coming for something like extra rice crackers," Haruaki turned towards the desk again. As the thought of "I'd better work hard and sort out this question, it's very important" crossed his mind, Haruaki proceeded to continue his duel against the handout, still covered in blanks.

At this moment, he heard the paper door slide shut behind him while Fear walked over to him timidly and slowly on the tatami floor.

"I have a something... I need your help with."

"Mmm-hmm."

"No, rather... It's something that must be said, that's what I mean."

"Okay."

Haruaki simply responded indifferently. However, Fear's quiet voice was slowly approaching his back—

"I—may have done something wrong."

"Really really... Huh?"

"Only now did Haruaki notice the atmosphere of dissonance. Fear's tone of voice sounded very serious with a hint of worry. This was definitely not the voice she used in her usual willfulness when demanding rice crackers. Instead, it was more sincere, more unusual—Indeed, it was as though she was forcing out a message from the very depths of her heart—

"I really can't... bear it any longer... So..."

Haruaki felt warm breath against his ear. Why was she... leaning in... so close? An inexplicable sense of pressure made him afraid to look back. All he could hear was irregular panting. He could imagine Fear blushing, breathing irregularly, her lips approaching his ear—What the heck did she want to do exactly?

"Arghhhh... How did explaining what happened become so hard? Anyway, it's this. What I want to tell you is this. So, Haruaki, could you turn your head towards me..."

Haruaki did not dare turn his head. The mechanical pencil in his hand also began to shake. The mathematics handout, originally considered a tough enemy, would be mere fodder worth only 1EXP in comparison. Good heavens~ How did it come to this? Running away from fodder was possible but not for boss characters.

"Ahh..."

"What?"

Haruaki now felt a new sensation against his ear. Amidst the nonstop panting, a soft and slightly wet object was moving back and forth against his earlobe, gently and carefully—No mistake about that.

His ear was being licked.

"W-Woah! W-What are you doing, Fear!? Listen carefully, you must calm down. I don't really get what this is about, but you must first calm down! You must be temporarily out of your mind, right?"

"...Huh? What are you talking about?"

"Stop going 'huh,' okay!?"

Despite his serious confusion, Haruaki still managed to activate the willpower dormant in the depths of his brain cells, turning his head to look all at once. The result—

Lick~

For some reason, the tongue that was even nearer than Fear's voice gave Haruaki's nose a forceful lick.

"Woof woof! ...H-H-Huff!"

Held in Fear's outstretched hands, an especially cute little animal was currently wagging its tail vigorously.

Part 4

In any case...

Fear had apparently picked up a puppy during her walk.

"Oh... I see? That's what happened..."

Haruaki smiled radiantly while pointing to a different direction:

"Put the dog back where you found it."

"What!? Are you even human? How could you be so heartless!? No way, no way, I—DON'T—WANNA—! Because this little guy is so fuzzy and soft! You've really disappointed me, Haruaki!"

Fear hugged the puppy tightly in both arms and hunched herself as though trying to protect it from Haruaki's harm.

"You... How could you just suddenly start keeping a dog?"

Konoha spoke with her hand against her temple. Like Haruaki and Fear, she was sitting at the living room table. Hearing all the commotion, she had left her room to ask what was happening at the living room.

"I-It's not like I'm asking for your opinion, Cow Tits! Like me, you're not the master of the house, so you don't have any authority to decide... No wait! Dangerous! You're very dangerous! You meat demon! Could it be that y-you wanna eat him?"

"...I'm not going to eat him."

Seeing Fear hide the puppy behind her with a worried expression, Konoha reacted with a twitch on the edge of her face. Perhaps thinking that the discussion would definitely be derailed if she blew up at Fear right now, Konoha was probably suppressing her emotions. What amazing self-control.

"However, now at least I understand why you're behaving so suspiciously. So you just wanted to get food for him... And you also fed your original stash of rice crackers to him."

"Muu... That's right. But it feels like it's not enough for him... Also, I was thinking I can't keep hiding him, so I wanted to try discussing with you..."

Fear curled herself up . Haruaki went "hmm" and examined the dog held in her embrace.

A small-sized dog with lovely colored fur. Not very knowledgeable much about dogs, Haruaki did not know what breed the dog was but got the impression it was foreign. In other words, the dog looked very expensive... To think this kind of dog would be abandoned.

It was also wearing a collar that seemed to have the owner's telephone there but could not be read due to serious abrasive damage. Most likely, it was done on purpose before the abandoning the dog.

"What should we do in this kind of situation? I guess we should contact the police? If we call the police, they should be able to seek out the original owner, right?"

"I dunno~"

"...If they don't help find the owner, then what?"

"Well... Probably find a new owner... But if a new owner cannot be found..."

Haruaki did not finish. As a result, even though Fear was unfamiliar with how Japan dealt with stray dogs, she still received an ominous impression. Greatly alarmed, she hugged the dog even tighter.

"I think letting him stay and keeping him as a pet is the best solution! It must be! Come on Haruaki, please, please! I'll listen to whatever you say from now on and obey any command. Even if you ask me to scrub your back in the bathroom like last time, I'll do it! It's embarrassing, but I'll bear it!"

"You clearly did that on your own without my permission!"

Completely ignoring Haruaki's retort, Fear frowned and kept pestering "Pretty please? Pretty please?" as she brought her face up close, almost touching his nose. Haruaki frantically cast his gaze to the side and happened to look into the eyes of the puppy in her arms.

Big, round eyes. Innocent look. The puppy's unwary expression displayed its trust in these three people as it tilted its head blankly as though stating that malevolence did not exist in this world.

(Ooh...)

Haruaki felt his heart getting shot by something. Argghhh, damn it, so cute~ If we abandon this little guy, he'll really be pitifully alone. On television, it was also reported that dogs at shelters only had a very low percentage of getting adopted~ Please be more kind, people of Japan. And I'm Japanese too, ahhhhh.

"Nuu... Gggg..."

"Haruaki, what's the matter, Haruaki~?"

Fear continued to ask to be spoiled while staring at Haruaki from the right, the left and down below while he was frozen, head bowed. She tugged at his sleeve like a little child. Although Haruaki did not react to her gestures, he slowly looked up after a short while.

"If we release him outside now... It'll be us who are abandoning him... Right?"

"—! Th-That's right, that's what it'll end up!"

"Anyway, yeah, let's do it this way first. We'll try asking classmates at school first. Perhaps someone might be willing to adopt him. Before that, let him stay here for now... Perhaps... that might... be better."

"O-O-O-O-O-Of course we need to do that! We are responsible! And I get the feeling it'd be best if no one adopts him. Rather, there won't be, but don't mind that! Before we find someone to adopt him, we must protect him!"

"...Then it's decided."

Although Haruaki saw Konoha sigh helplessly on the side, he pretended not to see. On the other hand, Fear instantly stood up in all smiles, lifting the puppy up like a trophy.

"Waha—! Wonderful, from today on, you'll be a member of this family! Uh—Right, we need a name! We need to name him first!"

"Pooch is basically the most commonly used in Japan."

"What kind of tasteless statement is that! This guy is like family that I found. Right, so I wanna give him a name that's clearly related to me the moment you hear it... Uh..."

Fear lifted and spun the puppy for a while. The puppy barked in concert with the act. Then Fear suddenly stopped and grinned as though saying "This is perfect!"

"Yes! Your name is—Guillotine!"

"Th-That's the worst name!"

"What—You don't like it... By the way, the second candidate is Iron Maiden."

"No no no no~"

Haruaki did not even know where to begin. Just as he waved his hand before his face, Fear started to explain the meaning on her own.

"Oh~ Right, I forgot to confirm something important... Hmm, she's female. Then there's no problem. No wait, this means that the second candidate is more fitting? But Guillotine sounds more catchy..."

Holding the puppy under its forearms, Fear muttered and looked between its legs. At this moment, the sounds of a cheesy drama could be heard from the television that had been on all this time. 'Shouji-san! I love you!' 'Shouko... I'm sorry.'—Hearing these lines, Fear nodded vigorously with a sudden realization.

"I see. So Japanese names have rules of gender variations, right? Then out of respect for Haruaki, I'll follow the basic rules of this country. In that case... Let's call her Guillotine-ko."

"This name is so bad it's unbelievable! In all sorts of ways!"

"Why are you complaining so much? Otherwise, what should I do?"

"Sigh... Just call her Guillotine, it basically sounds like a French name..."

"Then why didn't you say so from the start?"

Although Fear pouted in her reply, she was still quite happy and even gave her blessing by singing "Guillotine~ Guillotine~ Guilotiiiiine—!" in her own improvised melody... Should she be stopped?

However, there was still one person present who was not pleased by the blessing.

"I cannot accept this."

"...Konoha?"

Sitting formally in seiza with narrowed eyes, Konoha continued in a calm but forceful voice:

"I understand Haruaki-kun has a heart of kindness. However, you must reflect more on your situation. You clearly have no idea how to take care of a dog and your schedule is already packed from handling household matters and school. If you increase your burdens any further... There will be a problem."

"C-Cow Tits! I'll take care of Guillotine myself, so there!"

"You want to take care of her when you're lacking in basic common sense? Don't be ludicrous. Surely, Haruaki-kun will end up taking care of the dog in your place."

This comment really sliced to the core of the matter. As much as Fear wanted to object, she knew clearly her lack of common sense. Consequently, she could only gnash her teeth while glaring at Konoha.

"No, uh—Umm, Konoha...? You should know too that we can't just throw her out, right?"

"But it is also true that we cannot afford keeping her. I'm really reluctant to say this but it's not like feeding a dog doesn't cost money. And we can't skimp on shots and vaccines, right? Our home expenses have increased ever since this child's arrival. Do we have excess cash to spend in this area?"

"Ugh!"

The very correct argument of budget issues stabbed mercilessly into Haruaki's chest. Hence, amidst the heavy atmosphere on scene, Konoha stood up slowly and looked at Haruaki and Fear coldly.

"Please allow your brains to calm down, then consider things carefully. Of course, it needs to be a solution apart from keeping the dog as a pet. I will ponder carefully during bath time as well—We'll discuss again after my bath."

Saying that without allowing any objections, Konoha walked out of the living room, leaving Haruaki and Fear to exchange glances.

"What do we do, Fear?"

"This pisses me off, damn Cow Tits! Is her massive bust our final obstacle!?"

"No, it's got nothing to do with busts."

"Hold on, I've got a plan... Fufu, my eyes cannot be deceived...!"

Haruaki watched in puzzlement as Fear clenched her fists and muttered emphatically.

Held in Fear's hands, Guillotine also tilted her head as though imitating Haruaki's posture.

Part 5

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Part 6

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Part 7

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Translator's Notes and References

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