Failing Witch:Index Crossover3

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A Certain Magical Index Collab SS: Myousou Yagoro and Kamijou Touma[edit]

It was late at night and a pointy-haired high schooler named Kamijou Touma found nothing but a world of swords and sorcery as far as the eye could see. He stood next to a giant pumpkin lamp in dazed shock.

“Was it a truck?”

A shadow fell over Mr. Misfortune’s face.

He was already pulling an invisible gloominess toward himself.

“It must’ve been either a truck or exhaustion. Oh, who am I kidding – it was exhaustion! The most peaceful method would be if I was summoned here by a cute elf priestess in see-through clothing so I could save the world, but it obviously wasn’t that. I mean, I can’t exactly pass through an occult portal when I have Imagine Breaker in my right hand, can I!? I also haven’t played any homemade video games or read any mysterious books I found in a used bookstore, so the ‘traveling worlds after dying’ option is really all that’s left, right!? I can’t believe this! Did I really drop dead from exhaustion in high school!? How busy is my life!?”

A tutor named Myousou Yagoro gave him a skeptical look.

The blond boy was carrying a cloth bag full of the vegetables he had bought at a street stall shortly before closing time.

“What am I looking at here? That school uniform and phone do not belong in this city of swords and sorcery. How would you even get your hands on synthetic fibers and plastic here? Wait, wait, wait. He didn’t make those based on knowledge picked up from me, did he?”

“And look. The first person from the other world I meet isn’t even a cute girl. It’s some filthy boy. That’s how you know my misfortune really is the strongest.”

“Hey, you, come with me. If you disturb the order of this world wandering around dressed like that, you’ll be in trouble once the Benandanti spot you. And I get the feeling you don’t have anywhere to stay.”

“No, I couldn’t possibly impose myself on a complete stranger. Besides, if I’m stuck in another world, I want to have some fun! There must be an adventurer’s guild with hunting quests I can use to earn enough money to stay at an inn! Hell, yes! Wait for me, bunny-filled casino and matching lobby full of scantily-clad girls who all want to join my party!!”

“That’s the squatters district. If an outsider like you sets foot in there, you’ll get yourself stabbed. With an unhygienic rusty knife, I might add.”

“Huh? Is this one of those worlds where the criminals have competing guilds too?”

“There are no job hunting sites or foodbanks in this world. Without any kind of safety net to catch you, it’s impossible to crawl your way back up, so a different system is needed to help people survive. And when the law isn’t protecting them, people don’t hesitate to break it.”

Kamijou was nearly convinced, but then he tilted his head.

Where had this person heard about job hunting sites and foodbanks while living a life of swords and sorcery?

“Huh? Is that a friend of yours over there?”

“?”

Someone was approaching them. While waving.

They were…

They were…!!

“Huh, that’s another outfit I haven’t seen in forever.”

Yagoro just about accepted that, but then he focused on the newcomer again.

“No, wait,” he said. “That isn’t quite the outfit I’m familiar with. Could this be someone you know instea-”

Kamijou took off running in the opposite direction.

In fact, he was running away. He was fleeing with all his might. That was one of the standard survival strategies in a fantasy RPG.

“No! Academy City’s harsh schedule already killed me once, so I want nothing to do with anyone from that city!! I died and wound up in another world, so I’m getting some rest no matter what it takes. I swear I’m going to plow a field in the forest, cook a stew with dragon or chimera meat, and enjoy a relaxing slow liiiiiiiiiiiife!!”

Myousou Yagoro watched him go with an exasperated sigh.

He didn’t even need to compare the speed and stamina of the two parties. The result was already plain to see.

Kamijou Touma could not escape!!


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