On a Godless Planet:Volume2A Chapter 18
Chapter 18: Gauntlet[edit]
–What do you call a god who fights gods?
●
Bilgamesh was on a mission.
After returning to school with the thunder god’s group and then climbing to the club building’s roof, he saw a group of gods from an unfamiliar mythology stargazing.
They had telescopes arranged in a circle while they observed the movement of the stars.
“I feel like they have that a little wrong, but it’s probably a difference in mythology.”
After speaking with that group, they borrowed some camping equipment.
Then the boys split up the equipment to store it at their respective homes. The plan was to bring that equipment when they met up tomorrow.
But when Bilgamesh returned home, he found a new mission waiting for him.
“Bil, I hate to ask this of you, but remember those pizza things Shifu told us about the other day? I was planning to fix one of those to use up everything in the fridge before tomorrow, but we don’t have any of the cheese it needs.”
“Understood.”
He figured they would have some in the basement of Tachikawa Station, but he found another new mission on the way.
He found the water monster that Eshtar had mentioned.
“Is that the thing Esthar was talking about?”
Curiously, the human was under attack again. Also…
…I sense the after effects of a combat field?
He looked into the sky and saw the faint halo of fading ether light.
That meant this water monster had been battling someone in an illegal combat field. And…
“Who is that man?”
“Well,” said the human. “He’s Mr. Vomit! Cause he got hit in the gut earlier and puked!”
I have no idea what you are talking about.
●
At any rate, that water monster was definitely an enemy.
“Why would it attack the human?”
“Right!? Right!? How could she attack this frail, little bunny of a thing who’d die if you did anything to me at all!? I mean, that shows she’s got excellent taste. I thought I was the only one who knew my true worth – y’know, like something they’d say on an educational show aired at 10:30 PM on a Saturday – but this monster gets it! She must love bunnies! But, wait! That means it’s the bunny-ness that has value, not me! So which is it, Mr. Vomit! Is it the bunny-ness or is it the me-ness!? Which will the world choose!?”
The human was being even more annoying than usual. I am impressed that lifespan goddess can stand him, thought Bilgamesh.
But this was a battle.
He had blocked the enemy attack with a Gauntlet. So…
“The enemy’s attacks do not work on me.”
He moved out ahead. Another blast was incoming.
He blocked it. He felt the impact hit, but the Gauntlet armor was undamaged. It wasn’t even chipped.
So he kept moving forward. Another blast was incoming. Several, in fact.
He blocked the repeated blasts and felt the impacts hit, but the Gauntlet armor remained undamaged. It still wasn’t even chipped.
He ran.
The enemy didn’t have time to adjust her rate of attacks. One then another blast arrived with much more even timing than expected. So just as the third one was completed…
“Gauntlet.”
He struck the enemy with an attack measuring more than 30m.
●
It hit. The enemy was made of water, but Bilgamesh still felt the blow land.
“How about that?”
Half the water monster’s body broke and burst, spray scattering through the shine of the streetlights and producing quite the refreshing sound.
The metal Gauntlet had used its great mass and speed to strike the enemy.
But the impact hadn’t made a sound.
The water fell on the paved footpath more thickly than rain and pooled up on the surface.
Meanwhile, the struck and scattered water monster moved a few of her legs toward the under-construction reservoir.
“–––––––”
The water monster’s form regenerated.
“I see. So I can’t damage her as long as she is near the water.”
Bilgamesh understood now. Physical blows could not defeat this enemy so close to a source of water.
So he attacked. While moving left to evade the incoming water blast.
“Gauntlet.”
He struck her with a second blow.
●
“Is Apology Man focusing on offense!?”
“Excuse me! Who is he!?”
I gave Mr. Vomit the correct answer.
“The great Mesopotamian hero – Apology Man!”
“Apology Man!?”
“Yup! His special move is apologizing on behalf of his own people! His authority is the willpower to keep his shirt tucked in on a hot summer night!”
“…”
“Believe me, Mr. Vomit! I’m the guy who splits the world into two halves: bunnies and non-bunnies! Oh, and I can give myself a sex change with a banana!”
Mr. Vomit didn’t seem to know what I meant, but when I thought about it, neither did I.
However…
“…!?”
Water beams were still flying, but in a different direction now.
The water monster enemy hadn’t fully regenerated yet, but Apology Man had rushed right up to the edge of the reservoir. And…
“Ohh!”
Apology Man used a Gauntlet shield bash to knock the water monster over to the road.
●
Bilgamesh’s plan was to scoop the water monster out of the water.
So he swung his Gauntlet up from below her like it was a shovel. He adjusted its size so it would be 8 meters when he readied it and 12 meters when he shoved it underneath her as if digging into the ground. And when he launched the enemy along with the ground, it would be…
“25 meters.”
He jabbed it right through dirt, grass, rocks, and gravel.
A static-like grinding sound threatened to stop it, but he kept going.
He had launched it with divine power. When he swung his arm, he was only providing support and acceleration on top of that.
It worked.
It snatched up and carried the water monster near perfectly.
“…!?”
She flew.
When the water monster fell along with so much dirt, she landed on the road. The asphalt. Hadn’t that material been used in ancient times to create mummies?
The water could not soak into the paved road. The waterway she would want to escape to was located behind Bilgamesh. Then he readied his fist.
“I will punch you.”
●
The liquid was torn apart.
The blows sounded like machines in operation. The first impact produced water spray and the consecutive ones kept pushing.
The pummeled water monster had no way to resist.
She lacked the power to damage the fist – the giant gauntlet – launched by the enemy.
All she had was the ability to regenerate. But even that…
“–––––––!?”
Her water was immune to attacks. But as much as the attacks looked ineffective, they still sent some water flying, reducing the total amount she had to work with when regenerating.
Her enemy’s barrage was straightforward to a fault, but it was still wearing her down.
She only realized this after being pushed back a dozen or so meters.
She swung her arms forward to form a cannon as a counterattack, but…
“…!?”
The cannon wasn’t long enough, so it fell apart.
The cannon was made from the serpents making up her legs, but a few of them now had too little water, causing them to lose their shape and fall away.
She needed more water.
Because she had been separated from the reservoir.
She stared at her hands like they had disappeared, but…
“You must be confident if you don’t feel a need to guard.”
An attack arrived.
This would tear her apart, but she could reform quickly enough.
However, she had failed to form the cannon. She couldn’t do it. It wasn’t possible.
At this rate, she would fall apart entirely. So…
“…!!”
She instantly turned around. She still had enough legs left, so she ran.
She fled.
This was not a retreat. She turned tail and ran as quick as her remaining legs would take her.
She didn’t care where she went. As long as she left this road and found a source of water. Where could she find water? Where?
“–––––––!!”
“What’s the rush?”
She heard a voice from behind.
“Ki, I could use a Heat Body.”
●
“Heat Body!?”
Ki was in the kitchen when she checked the Revelation Board from her partner.
Heat Body was one of her Auth Spells. It superheated Bilgamesh’s equipment. The trick was that it only heated the outer surface, so it was a physical-boosting spell meant for him to tackle the enemy.
Basically, it was a spell that provided rapid heat, but…
“Heat Body. Right.”
She looked in front of her.
A long metal screw was stuck upside-down in the pot on the stove. The bronze-colored screw was part of Bilgamesh’s summoned armor, but it made cooking a breeze when she applied Heat Body to it.
In other words, she was already using Heat Body in the kitchen. And she didn’t see anything wrong with that.
She of course hadn’t told him she used it this way. If he found out, he would probably scowl and he might even start doing the cooking himself. The thing was, he was actually a fairly decent cook. So what was the problem? There wasn’t one? No, there was. It was a matter of her pride. That was it.
…If I switch this one off now, it’ll only be half boiled.
The pot contained sinewy beef. Low temperature cooking was easier with Heat Body than simmering it over a low heat. She considered making a pot out of his summoned armor sometime, but that could wait.
“Right now? Got it. Give me a second.”
●
The effect arrived right away.
Several Auth Spell Revelation Boards opened. The spare heat was created within the ether composing the spell and then it was injected directly into the target object.
“There we go!”
The Gauntlet’s surface superheated, causing it to look red for just a moment.
“Is it glowing?”
“It is superheated!”
This level of heating only worked when the Gauntlet was kept small. But the largest values were still truly massive. It allowed over a dozen meters.
Then he made a short dash that seemed to launch him toward the fleeing water monster’s back.
“This blue Roper is done for!”
●
Oh, she does kind of look like a Roper, I thought.
That was when Mr. Vomit suddenly stepped forward.
“Please wait! That spirit is-”
“Isn’t it a little late to do that now, Mr. Vomit?”
“No! Um, hey!? Wait!”
Apology Man was making his attack while we spoke. He performed a really nice short dash, and…
“Ohhh!”
He hit.
Solidly too. Because he hit her with a shield bash and then stopped. Instead of continuing through her, he hit and stopped. Isn’t that called zanshin? I thought.
Then I heard a metallic sound.
Yeah, it was definitely metallic. And when I heard it…
“Hm?”
Strange.
This seemed odd to me. He had hit water, so why would it sound metallic?
●
“What’s the deal, Apology Man! Did she eat a piece of your equipment!?”
“No!” replied Bilgamesh, looking in front of him.
Someone stood between him and the water monster.
A girl.
She was younger than him and had red hair tied back in a braid. She wore a school uniform and she held her right hand out toward Bilgamesh.
“Name yourself.”
“Very well,” she replied in a ringing voice. “I am the war goddess of 7th Generation Olympus mythology. Is that enough for you?”
●
Bilgamesh thought about this.
“Hm.”
He considered the question she had asked him.
…7th Generation?
That much he understood.
…Olympus mythology?
He had heard of that.
…War goddess?
No clue.
…Is that enough for me?
It was not.
To sum it all up: who was this girl?
He tried to figure out what to do about this.
The goddesses in his Mesopotamian mythology held a lot of power. That said, the local humans had developed a legal system that favored men and established a strongly patriarchal society, perhaps as a result of all the wars of dominance fought between the city-states, so what accounted for the discrepancy between the power of women seen in the society and in its mythology? He had a feeling he would receive an explanation along with a lot of extraneous information If he asked the Norse or Shinto knowledge gods.
That aside, the goddesses from his mythology, like Esthar and Shamhat, had some wild stories about them and even his mother, the goddess Shamash, was a fairly powerful figure.
In other words, there wasn’t much difference between male and female when it came to the gods. The warrior gods in particular were all equal.
And this girl here had called herself a war god.
He approved of her spirit. Because she had named herself despite knowing who he was. But…
…Who is she?
Did they know each other? It wasn’t unusual for someone to remember him when he had forgotten them, but that would be really awkward here.
Furthermore, this girl seemed to think she was a major god. The “is that enough for you?” implied it should be enough. But it very much wasn’t for him.
…Then again, it would be historically impossible for a 5th generation god like me to know about a later generation.
Then it wasn’t his fault. Bilgamesh held his right hand out toward her.
“Pause.”
●
“Huh!?”
The girl sent him a frantic shout of confusion, so he responded.
“You don’t know what that means?”
He couldn’t blame her for that. He hadn’t known until recently.
It happened back in the game club’s clubroom when the thunder god showed off a game modeled after Bilgamesh, Ki, and Eshtar. The thunder god had suddenly frozen the game.
“Hmm!? Did it break!?”
“No, I just hit the pause button. That lets you take a short break.”
“Pause?”
“Oh,” replied the harvest goddess while she lined snacks up on the table. “I hear people say that a lot at tourist destinations. They’ll hold their camera up and go, ‘say pause’. Or was that cheese?”
“Why would it be cheese? That’s a food.”
“Then it must’ve been pause.”
“Anyway, the point is it forcibly stops everything. The concept was created by a powerful company in Kyoto, so now that one word will stop anything, whether it’s a myth, a great war, or an adventure story.”
“That word stops everything, you say?”
“Well, sometimes it brings up your inventory too, but it still stops things.”
That was a major discovery.
It was apparently a human rule, but he figured it had to be obeyed if everyone was working to recreate this era. So…
“If someone says that word in this Divine World, you must temporarily stop.”
“Since when!?”
“I will omit the details, but Kyoto etiquette says even myths and wars must temporarily stop when that word is uttered.”
“Did the humans come up with that rule!?”
“They did,” said Bilgamesh. “It was likely created to prevent conflicts like this one. It took them thousands of years, but I am pleased to see the humans have finally acquired a way of ensuring peace. And since we gods have greater intelligence than the humans, it follows that we too can master the use of this rule. Don’t you agree?”
“I-I guess…”
“Excellent,” said Bilgamesh, opening a Revelation Board.
●
“Excuse me, human. Who is this in front of me?”
“I’m pretty sure I know who’s to blame for what’s happening in front of me, but that is one of the worst excuses I’ve ever heard.”
<Your opinion notwithstanding, I am considering making that an official rule.>
“Will it be official if we do it a couple more times?”
“I am not sure what you are talking about, but I would appreciate it if you answered my question.”
“Okay. I think the girl in front of you is Athena.”
“You mean her name is Athena?”
“Yeah. She wears a red micro bikini and fights with a flaming sword. She has her own theme song.”
“How indecent.”
<I feel like most gods might just die of shock if they heard a Mesopotamian god calling them that.>
“How bad is Shinto?”
<I could at least hold an intelligible conversation with the Mesopotamian gods. Something I can’t always say about Shinto.>
“Hey, don’t be mean! Senpai and I hold intelligible conversations all the time!”
<Bilgamesh, do you have anything to add?>
“It is possible to communicate without holding a conversation. More importantly, what kind of god is this Athena?”
“She has bodyguards with constellation motifs, her head is trapped inside a jar, and she tries to trap her opponent in a jar, but her catchphrase is ‘you can solve any problem if you’re willing to throw your life away’.”
“She sounds like a demon.”
<To be clear, Greek mythology contains no such stories.>
●
Bilgamesh understood well enough.
He didn’t wholly understand, but he had a feeling this was enough for now.
…We should be able to communicate!
So he faced the girl who had been glaring at him for a while now.
I understand thee well enough. So…
“You are Athena, aren’t you!? I will omit the details, but I know that much.”
“You mean you didn’t even know that!?”
He had the right answer but he had failed to communicate.
…What went wrong?
He had no clue. So he gave up trying to think it out.
The situation was underway.
Past Athena, the water monster had been weakened after losing so much mass. She was doing her very best to escape but this path passed through the school, meaning there was no water nearby.
There was a culvert on the road out front, but…
“I am working to slay an enemy. I apologize, but can this wait?”
“It can’t. That water monster is under my jurisdiction. Also…”
The girl ejected a Revelation Board from her right hand.
“I am an inspector. You will obey me.”
●
“…?”
Bilgamesh was confused.
“That water monster is attempting to attack the human there. One of our duties is to eliminate all obstacles to the safe progression of the terraforming. Thus, I must eliminate that water monster.”
“Again, she is under my jurisdiction. You do realize disobeying an inspector is the same as defying the DC, don’t you?”
“An inspector would overlook an obstacle to the terraforming?”
“I never said anything about overlooking this. I will capture her.”
“No!!”
Bilgamesh heard a voice from behind. Athena frowned and Bilgamesh looked back.
“Hey! Mr. Vomit! Looks like you’ve got something to say, but don’t push yourself too hard! You give off major ‘weakling’ vibes!”
“Mr. Vomit.”
“That is his name.”
“You expect me to believe that!?”
“Only the humans can create myths. So if a human named him that, I fail to see the problem.”
“Oh!? I like the way you think, Apology Man! Keep that respect coming my way!”
“Apology Man?”
“He is wrong about that one. My name is Bilgamesh.”
That one needed correction. But he heard another voice from behind.
“You must not let Olympus capture her!”
“Why not?”
“Eh!? You actually listened to me!?”
Was it that much of a surprise?
“Mr. Vomit, you can speak up for yourself!? So what is it!? What do you want!? Out with it!”
The human was getting annoying. After a slight pause, the older god spoke slowly as if choosing his words carefully.
“Olympus gods hope to increase their position within the DC by capturing her. The highest position, in fact. We have worked with them for a long time and, while we have benefited from that arrangement, I do not want this to happen…so I came here to stop it.”
●
Bilgamesh had no interest in social status. He was a king and “He who Saw the Deep”. But…
“I do not like it when people use underhanded methods to get ahead.”
“Are you going to disobey an inspector?”
“If the enforcer of the law is corrupt, then disobedience is true obedience to the law.”
“That’s so cool, Tucked Shirt!”
Do not compliment me. I am only speaking the truth.
“If you cannot prove the righteousness of your actions, I will determine the truth for myself.”
●
Athena inhaled.
She was regulating her breathing. Or trying to.
“Gauntlet.”
Gilgamesh attacked before she could.
…He’s fast!
She knew of Bilgamesh. He apparently didn’t know of her, but they were both gods of mythologies who ranked high enough for the DC to send them out as inspectors.
For later mythologies, it was crucial to study up on the fighters from the earlier mythologies. Especially in cases like this when she knew what gods she would be up against. But…
“…!”
This seemed very different from the data she had on him.
●
I saw sparks fly and heard clashing metal.
“Apology Man!”
Apology Man flew through the air.
Tucked Shirt eliminated his giant Gauntlet and flipped twice before landing.
He had clearly blocked some kind of attack and been knocked backwards by it.
That meant two things. First…
“Apology Man’s artifact didn’t work!?”
That weapon had engaged in a serious fistfight with Raidou-senpai, but it was repelled here? And second…
“Is this that thing where the new team member jobs to the new villain in the very next episode!?”
“What does any of that mean?”
Apology Man landed in front of me. He’s surprisingly nimble, I noted. But…
“What is that?”
I saw the thing that had responded to Apology Man’s attack and blown him away.
“Athena Ek Mekhanes.”
Athena said the words, but she was no longer there. In her place was…
“A life-size garage kit.”
A humanoid machine stood there with a height of at least 10m.
It was colored white, it had a feminine shape, and it was equipped with a shield that doubled as a spear.
“We call it a Dynamo Theos. The Olympus gods created them to fight against the Giants. But in this world, perhaps I should use the terminology used during the Earth Age.”
She named it.
“God of War – Victorious Empress.”
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