Editing Phenomeno:Case 13


 

==Case 13: Spiritual Paths==

It was a clear winter morning.

Karasu-san—her real name being Yukiko Nadare on the family register, had silently been cremated.

After a simple ceremony had been held with just her family, the body that had lived in this world as ‘Karasu’, was reduced to beautiful ash. The girl contained in the funerary urn was so small, her long slender figure, glamorous body, beautiful black hair and large eyes – all traces of her face had already disappeared.

And, right now, I was staring at it in front of the altar at the back of the assembly hall in the annex of the funerary hall.

Her funerary urn was adorned with countless Anemone(Which Karasu-san loved before her death), and above it was a large photograph of her. I was worried that I would shamefully break down in tears when I stood before Karasu-san who ended up in ashes– however, I disappointingly betrayed that. Because, in the extra-large sized picture, Karasu-san had a broad grin on her face. She cutely winked with one eye, as if to say, “Well, I’ll be seeing the so-called other side first.” Her eyes twinkled with excitement as she said that, and she even made a peace sign. I was taken aback by that smile, and I had my jaw slightly open as I looked back at the outrageousness of that portrait, which was nothing at all like a portrait of a deceased person, when-- <image here>

“Yo, Nagi-kun, it’s been a long time.”

I turned around after being called out, and there was Suu-san’s well-rounded smile. Like me, he was a regular of ‘Ikaigabuchi’, an old man who was one of the oldest members of the site, his primary business was being the owner of a liquor store.

“Wow, last time we met was in the previous offline meeting, huh? How have you been doing? ...Haha. I guess you’re not doing so well.”

“Ahh… Haha. I’m fine.”

I laughed so for the moment, but to be honest, a dull aching pain remained here and there. I stood there as a very painful figure, with both sides of my torso wrapped in a cast under my navy-blue suit, and a bandage on my right arm. I hadn't actually been cleared to leave the hospital yet, but I forced the doctor to expedite my discharge just for this day.

“But, it sure is amazing—this venue. No matter how you look at it, it’s nothing like a funeral, and nothing like a memorial either.”

I looked around at Suu-san's exclamatory words, and replied, “That’s quite true.” 

There were countless people in the assembly hall. In addition to her friends, acquaintances, and the regulars from ‘Ikaigabuchi’, more than a hundred people had gathered, there were also her professional clients as a "fortune teller"—in short, company presidents, politicians, people from the backstreets, and countless others arrived one after the other. The rather large venue was completely filled.

And everyone had a radiant smile on their faces. In the first place, I didn't see anyone in mourning attire. There were people in jeans and T-shirts, biker men dressed in leather, and I even saw a woman wearing a party dress. If you entered this place without knowing anything about it, you might mistake it for a wedding party or something, and the atmosphere was so convivial that nowhere did it feel solemn or subdued or anything like that.

Right—to be precise, what was being held here today was not a ‘funeral’. The hall with the tall ceiling was filled with lively Western rock and jazz music, and all kinds of snacks and drinks were set in one corner of the room, and above all, there was a flashy sign put up at the entrance to the hall that said, ‘Farewell Party’.

“It seemed to have been in her will. She said, ‘Please never remember me in tears’. Very much like her."

The plump liquor store owner spoke as he loosened his necktie and leaned against the wall with a wineglass in one hand.

“As such, I can only assume that Karasu-san did indeed realize the time of her death.”

“…Realized the time of her death?”

“Huh? Nagi-kun, You didn’t hear?”

No, I shook my head.

“Hmm, I see. Well, it’s a story all old timers of ‘Ikaigabuchi’ are aware of. In her high school days, she got involved in something strange and threw away her real name.”

“…Threw it away? Her real name?”

“I don’t know the details of what exactly happened. She would befuddle you by telling you that it’s better not to know, but it seems to have been a very dangerous incident. I heard that Karasu-san’s mother died because of it or something.”

With those words, I finally realized. The two men at the center of the hall who were politely bowing to the attendees one-by-one. They must have been Karasu-san’s father and brother. And there was indeed no sign of a mother-like figure near the serious-looking men.

“But it seems that Karasu-san herself didn’t believe she had escaped that incident by throwing away her name. That’s why she would always say it when she was drunk. She would say, 『I’m sure that one day, I’ll suddenly disappear from everyone's sight, but I never want you to grieve for me. 』

I hung my head down, not knowing how to respond to the story I had never heard before, when--

“I’ve heard it too.”

I heard a clear voice close by.

I turned my head to see Yukihito Kurimoto-kun in his school uniform, bowing politely.

“Nagito-san, it’s been a long time.”

“Yo, have you been well?”

Yukihito Kurimoto-kun was the younger brother of Krishna-san, the manager of ‘Ikaigabuchi’, and was currently a first-year student in the Koumei university affiliated high school. He was handsome in every meaning of the word, and he gave me a worried look with his soft, light hair and well-groomed face, like that of Krishna-san.

“I’m fine of course, but—Nagi-kun, are your injuries alright?”

“Ah, somehow. Haha, it is how it is.”

I vigorously shook my left arm, the one that wasn’t bandaged down. But just by the vibration alone, my entire body creaked and let out a scream, Guh, I choked. The right elbow in particular hurt like hell, since it had scraped against concrete to the point where the bone was visible.

“Please don’t push yourself.”

Smiling like a spring breeze, Yukihito-kun straightened the black necktie around his neck.

“Ah, Yukihito-kun. Never mind that, you said you heard it too—you mean you heard the story of Karasu-san’s time of death?”

“Yes. Before. It’s….um, it’s from back when I was still troubled you see. I was told the story when I was made to see Karasu-san as a sort of counselling. She said,『Someday, maybe very soon, I'll suddenly disappear, so please remember me.』I thought she meant it as 『Don’t keep depending on me forever』, and after that, I began to think for myself a little.”

“Ah, to say that to a boy in puberty is harsh--”

Suu-san smiled, and Yukihito-kun gave an embarrassed smile in reply.

“Back then, I thought I was being pushed away, and I did indeed think that women were scary… but, now that she really has disappeared, I think she was trying to encourage me to stand on my own.”

Suu-san and I followed Yukihito-kun’s gaze as he looked back, and we gazed in the far-off distance at the smiling Karasu-san in the photograph.

However, Suu-san quickly let out a ‘Pfft’.

“That picture doesn't even bring a tear to my eyes.”

“Yes.”

I, too, couldn't help but smile.


However, I took a hard look at it, and thought once more—

That it was indeed a strange picture.

Regardless of being a lively meet that was called a ‘Farewell party’, it wasn’t just me who would recall Karasu-san midway through the conversation and be at a loss of what to say. There were moments when the reality of a ’person dying’ would stab at my heart, when my thoughts would end up stopping in their tracks. But when I would look up, that joking wink and smiling face would be looking down on me. At that moment, my sadness would dissipate, and I would suddenly realize that my heart became lighter. To the point where I would end up thinking that ‘dying’ meant going on a simple trip to a neighboring country.

“That picture must be a form of Karasu-san’s consideration.”

Suu-san’s voice was a little hoarse as he spoke.

“Anyone who can be somber in the face of that foolish picture must be really dark from their roots.”

Thereupon, I realized the presence of a small shadow working diligently in front of the drinks counter. 

It was indeed Krishna-san, my senpai in university and the manager of the occult site ‘Ikaigabuchi’, to whom I owed a great debt of gratitude. She was handing out drinks to the visitors who came one after the other with a smile on her face. She was dressed in a black and white suit with only her glasses being in color, but—

“I guess she’s the one who has it the hardest.”

Suu-san’s words suddenly made me realize.

“She must be really depressed at having to close down ‘Ikaigabuchi’.”

“Ah…about that, has it already been decided? Why does she have to close it down? I don’t think Karasu-san would be happy about that.”

“…Ngh.”

After taking a sip of the wine, Suu-san hesitated for a while over whether to say something or not, before eventually telling us.

“I believe it happened a few years ago. Someone involved in ‘Ikaigabuchi’ died. Well, he was a reckless guy who kept venturing into haunted spots on his own regardless of whether Krishna-san stopped him or not.”

I suddenly felt mortified, like he was talking about me.

“In the end, he lost his senses and got run over by a train. At that time Krishna-san was so distraught that she made a great big fuss, saying she was going to quit and close the website. But, the one who stopped her from closing the site back then was Karasu-san. She acted quite out of character back then, you know. The normally outgoing and playful Raven-san wrapped her hands around Krishna-san’s cheeks and shouted at her, 『Are you listening, Krishna-chan? Don’t focus only on those who are hopelessly delusional and turn your eyes away from the countless ghosts who could be saved!』Well, Krishna-san changed her mind thanks to that – but, the question of whether or not to continue ‘Ikaigabuchi’ must have always been swirling inside that small body of hers.”

“……”

“’Ikaigabuchi’ is different from your average occult website. There are times when articles go beyond the realm of just being thrilling and enjoyable ghost stories, when they have to be investigated seriously. And, although we can't understand why – the information on ‘Ikaigabuchi’ we can’t see is always secretly sealed away by Krishna-san alone. If she made that decision after accepting Karasu-san’s words, then there’s nothing we can do as mere visitors to the site.”

…Ah, that was true.

I took a glance at Krishna-san’s small back once more. 

Information on S ranked haunted places was also locked and stored on Krishna-san’s computer. It could not be published, nor could it be erased, it continued to exist as disturbing data on her computer, and having ended up gaining that information, it was inside her even now, wriggling in the dark.

“Ah, dammit…I’m really.” 

Without thinking about how tiring that strangeness must have been, I was only thinking about myself once more. I only wished for the preservation of this extremely precious community -- of this gathering of so many strange people.

I felt helplessly sorry.

I looked at the Krishna-san working hard in the distance, straightened my posture on the spot, and made a deep, deep bow.

 ◯

“UKyooooooooooooooooooooooo!”

…Umm, right.

Incidentally, the person emitting this strange, high-tension voice was the aforementioned Krishna-san, aka Shiina Kurimoto. 

She had a baby face and looked to be no more than a middle school student, but at the age of twenty-one, she was the president as well as the manager of one of Japan's largest occult websites. And now, the farewell party for Karasu-san had been upgraded to the regular year-end party for Ikaigabuchi, as well as a special farewell thanks from everyone because the site was being closed; Everyone had moved to the banquet hall on the second floor of a popular izakaya behind the station.

“—Hey, hey, do you drink? Are you drinking, Nagi-kun!?”

She slithered up to me on all fours on the tatami mat with her face flushed red, but she hadn’t actually drunk a drop of alcohol. In other words, Krishna-san had no disposition for alcohol at all, seeing as how she transformed into a truly spectacular drunkard just by smelling alcohol like this.

“I don’t drink. I’m still only nineteen.”

“Why arench’ya drinking! Nineteen is no different from twenty!”

“Krishna-san, you’re slurring.”

“Fudging the subject! I dun’ know nuthin about nineteen or twenty!”

“The wall that separates the two is higher than any other age…”

“The high’er the wall the bett’r the pay off! Can ya still say yer a man? Are ya a man? Doncha think a girl would swoon all ova’ the face of a boy who makes that challenge?”

“Um, no, you’re getting way off topic there…”

Thereupon—

“K-u-ri-mo-to! K-u-ri-mo-to!”

The regulars of Ikaigabuchi began chanting vigorously and perplexingly in unison. As soon as they started, Krishna-san stood up with a beaming smile on her face and started jumping up and down. 

“When she’s encouraged like this, Krishna-san is really funny.”

Without a moment’s delay, Zippo-san, one of the regulars, whispered in a small voice in my ear.

“And, it’s a real feast for the eyes.”

Harley-san whispered briefly, and I looked once more to see--- Oohhh. Krishna-san’s bust that had matured much more than necessary, was bonging vigorously up and down, left and right, each time she would jump up and down.

“…Fuwoo,”

I was on the verge of a nosebleed.

“I can’t bear it.”

“It’s impossible to bear it.”

“The thing under the clothes is, how should I say…?”

“It's so vivid in my mind that I can almost dream about it.”

Not noticing the passionate sighs of the men, Krishna-san danced a rather incomprehensible dance with a folding fan in hand, given to her by someone else. 

“Come to think of it, Karasu-san was the one who came up with this performance.”

At someone's words, I took another look around the group of red-faced drunks who were clustered around the tatami matted space of around 50 sqm. It was, without a doubt, the usual offline meeting of ‘Ikaigabuchi’. However, Karasu-san was not present there anymore. Even though she was nowhere to be seen, the image of her clapping to the beat and rolling around in laughter still came vividly to mind.

“That person was always a genius at stirring up the place and getting things going.”

“But, she was also a genius at spotting the person who was down and being there for them.”

“She would be the nice person that would tell them exactly what they needed to hear at the time.”

Those mixed words of sorrowful farewells, gratitude and affection filled the hall---

And I realized. Karasu-san was loved by everyone. And knowing Karasu-san, she would have loved everyone in return, and she loved this kind of ‘Ikaigabuchi’. She treasured them from the depths of her heart: the bold nature of the people who would even enjoy the depths of the world beyond despite its vast darkness.

“She might have been happy…”

I unconsciously ended up mouthing those words, and Yukihito-kun besides me, cocked his head in puzzlement, so I explained in an embarrassed manner.

“…No, umm. That bastard Sako once told me that the strongest attribute in this world is to be a true masochist. The type of attribute that goes beyond just being thickheaded, that it can turn this hopeless world into pleasure alone. I didn’t understand it at the time – but, now that I recall Karasu-san like this, I think I get it. Of course, I miss her too. I mean, I still can’t believe it, and I probably won’t be able to accept her death for many years to come. There are many things I don't understand, such as the fact that she threw away her name, or that she carried with her something so heavy she could never tell people about in detail. But, Karasu-san tried to enjoy even that, and in fact did succeed in enjoying it, somehow…I understand that completely now.”

In response, Yukihito-kun gave a small nod and then a small smile.

“She, was really quite cool.”

“Aah.”

“She was tough in some ways, but she was smart, humorous, and cute.”

“…….Hmm, Yukihito-kun, is it possible that…?”

“…Eh?”

“Is it possible that you had a crush on Karasu-san?”

“…S, sorry, but.”

A bashfulness slipped in and out of view behind the mask the honor student wore, to which I replied.

“I mean, I’m the same. Or rather, it’s the same for everyone in ‘Ikaigabuchi’.”

Reflexively, I poured some more orange juice in Yukihito-kun’s glass, and toasted it together with my glass of cola. *Clink* A pleasant sounding noise chimed out, and at the same time, for some reason, I thought of Akane Nanamori, who had passed away at the same time.

That child would suffer no longer, right?

Was she missed, appreciated and given a warm send off like Karasu-san?

When I was hospitalized, Akane’s parents came to visit me once, but I don’t remember their faces anymore.

I closed my eyes and leaned back against the wall alone, with the glass in one hand. I ignored the tumult around me and was on the verge of recalling something else that was important— when I suddenly opened my eyes. I looked around the tumultuous drunken crowd in the banquet hall once more. 

In the corner of the tatami room that was around 50 sqm in space, where everyone was merry and making a ruckus— was a vacant seat.

“Say, that chair…”

I asked Yukihito-kun. “Is someone late?”

In response, ‘Eh’, Yukihito-kun looked at me and after that, “A…ah, ummm that’s right.” He nodded.

Something didn’t feel right with the way he vaguely answered that question—

“But, it’s that you see—”

A carefree and inarticulate voice was raised up from somewhere.

“It’s quite boring if we all keep repeating that Karasu-san was beautiful, funny, and wanted to get married and so forth.”

The party soon switched to everyone offering their dedications to Karasu-san. I looked to see that the petite, bob haired occult site manager, who had been dancing and jumping up and down just now, had rolled over and fallen asleep next to me.

“Won’t it be better for someone to tell a ghost story as a farewell?” 

“That sounds good.”

“Well then, allow me.”

“No, no, let me do it.”

What was wrong with these people? I was appalled, but it couldn’t be helped since this was the basic nature of the ‘Ikaigabuchi’ offline meetings that Karasu-san loved so much.

“Ah, speaking of ghost stories.”

The gentleman who butted in at that point went by the handle name of ‘Professor’, he was rumored to be a professor at a certain private university.

“The story, ‘The Overlapping house’ that was on ‘Ikaigabuchi’ a while ago was interesting.”

“Ah, it really was. I mean, six overlapping is a lot.”

…Overlapping? Six?

I cocked my head in puzzlement. I hadn’t checked the ‘Ikaigabuchi’ forums recently, so I didn’t know what they were talking about.

“Sorry, what’s this story about? What do you mean by six?”

“Umm, you know about spiritual paths, right? There was a place where six of them overlapped.”

--Spiritual paths.

If I remember correctly, I had heard of them from Krishna-san once before. Firstly, you look up the location of old temples(apparently cemeteries, graves and memorial towers were also included) on old maps, and then connect the temples to each other with a line. The points where the temple lines overlapped were called ‘Kegarechi’<ref>Apparently refers to the point of contact between valleys, a low point absent of ‘qi’, points which are said to be unlucky and prone to disaster.</ref>, and points where ‘Kegarechi’ overlapped on to ‘Kegarechi’ were said to be ‘spiritual paths’. The reason for this is that spirits who are sure they had to go to their graves after they died wander between houses and gravesites.

“A little while ago, Kaiko-san<ref>His nickname means silkworm</ref> got a hold of the old maps of this area.”

Suu-san spoke with a red face.

“So, to pass the time, he tried to connect temples, small shrines, and the ruins of all kinds of memorial towers with a line. By doing that, he found a dangerous place where six lines overlapped with each other. When he checked it out, he found that it was an empty house again. He didn’t know how it came to be empty, but when he indirectly asked the people in the neighborhood, strange stories kept coming up. Stories of a woman peeping through a gap in the shoji on the second floor when no one was supposed to be living there, or hearing someone’s laughter in the middle of the night, or a sharp metallic sound ringing out at times, and so on.”

A shiver suddenly ran through my back. 

“That is probably close to the stationery shop at the back of city hall.”

“Ahh, is it the shop which always has its shutters closed?”

“Was it a stationery shop before?”

Those kinds of conversations took place with Suu-san at the center, and I interrupted.

“How do you know about it?”

“Hey, hey, don’t be looking down on liquor stores, Nagi-kun. A liquor store with a large delivery network is familiar with the map of the city and the family structures, and rumors keep coming in even if you don’t like ‘em. If you wanna ask for directions on a trip, you ask a taxi first, and a liquor store second.”

“But.”

Thereupon Harley-san cut in the conversation.

“When the thread was blowing up with discussions about the nature of the sound and the laughter – the entire thread ended up disappearing.”

“Disappearing? Why is that?”

“Why, you ask…it’s obvious.”

Harley-san motioned his chin right next to me. At that moment, a happy-looking Krishna-san had rolled over in her sleep, and ended up using my knee as a pillow.

…Ah, I see.

That meant that after a long time, an S ranked haunted place had appeared.

In short, it meant that it was ‘the worst kind of place people shouldn’t be involved in’ on the occult website ‘Ikaigabuchi’, and the manager of ‘Ikaigabuchi’ couldn’t allow such dangerous information to spread unabated, and had the authority to suddenly delete the thread itself.

“Well, we even identified the place. Our shenanigans might have gone too far.”

Harley-san spoke after gulping down the gin rock in his hand.

“But, Nagi-kun. Actually…”

Suu-san chuckled as he lowered his voice.

“There's been talk of people volunteering to go there next Saturday late at night. You're welcome to—”

When—suddenly.

“…Ah, don’t…”

Shameless thoughts were triggered in my imagination somehow thanks to Krishna-san’s sleepy voice. She suddenly got up, and whether she had grasped the situation or not, she sharply rebuked her surroundings in a loud cute voice.

“...I said it already! You must not! I told you, didn’t I!?”

Although she had a sleepy expression on with traces of drool on her face, she was still indeed the president of ‘Ikaigabuchi’.

The red-faced drunkards who were present straightened themselves, and bowed down in unison, “We’re sorry”.



◯



A face like a Noh mask.

The man I met at the front gate of the university the following day could only be described as such.

I was walking along the road and saw a limousine with tinted glass parked next to a row of Zelkova trees in front of the main gate of Koumei university, and as I walked past it, I stared at it and thought to myself, ‘What an amazing car’. When suddenly, the rear passenger door opened, and that man stepped out. The man was tall and lean, his hair was brushed back, and he looked good in a stylish navy-blue suit. However, apart from that, it was as if there was nothing to remember him by, like he had no distinct features, and had a strange face which made his age hard to discern. 

“You must be Nagito Yamada-kun, right?”

He called out to me in a low tone of voice, and I replied ‘Yes’ back to him, but from there, the man didn’t even try to follow up with any comment. He merely looked down at me expressionlessly, like a robot. I too looked back at the face of that noh-faced man – but it was as if I couldn’t get a read on his emotions at all, although for some reason, I had a feeling I saw his vacant gaze somewhere before.

“Umm…Who might you be?”

I asked as if to go against his heavy, intimidating air.

“You’ve been taking care of <italic>that</italic>.”

The man spoke in a manner where his lips didn’t move. 

“…That?”

“My adopted daughter as per the family register.”

…….?

I was flabbergasted, not quite knowing what he was talking about, when the man turned towards the Koumei institute. 

He then took out an expensive looking silver colored lighter along with a foreign cigarette from his pocket and lit it. Of course, he didn’t bother to ask me, and I didn’t have time to tell him that this was a no-smoking area of the campus.

“It’ll soon be a year huh? It’ll be a long time for that to have stayed in the same place.”

“Um.”

A sweet fragrance drifted in the surroundings, and I asked while choking a little.

“Who is this girl you’re talking about?”

In response, the man turned his body slightly towards me and shifted his focus to me once more. He stared at me motionlessly once more with eyes like holes in a Noh mask. It felt as if he might have laughed slightly, but it might have just been my imagination.

The man exhaled a sweet ectoplasmic smoke from his mouth, and silently took out a business card from his pocket. I ended up grabbing it reflexively, but all that was written there was his name, ‘美鶴木志洲’ and a phone number. There was no job title, address or anything else. So I had no idea who he was.

“Shi…Shishu Mitsuru…gi?”

“It’s read as Shijima Mitsurugi. It doesn't matter, you won't get a chance to call me by my first name.”

He spoke in a low whisper, but—something rang inside me hearing the word ‘Mitsurugi’.

Mitsurugi? A girl--? Huh…?

As I opened every single drawer in my memory, searching for the identity of the string of intense nostalgia, anxiety, slight fear and countless other emotions that came from that name, the man looked at me as if he were licking up all my emotional transitions.

“It seems you’ve <italic>forgotten everything completely.”<italic>

“Forgotten--?”

I was about to ask, ‘Just who the hell are you?’ But I stopped as the man tsked at the back of his mouth. I felt disgusted by his presence, as if he were disciplining a misbehaving dog, as if he was used to always making people follow his orders.

“If you've forgotten, you shouldn't force yourself to remember. It's a capacity that's not given much importance you know, to forget, but it's one of the most useful weapons of a healthy human being. It was an incident that people shouldn't know about, and your involvement in it was like a random accident. There are fatalists in this world who connect everything to the inevitable, but you don't want to live that way because it's exhausting.”

The man who had the image of being silent and expressionless like a robot suddenly became talkative. 

However, was he embarrassed of himself? He once again fell into silence for a while after that. I didn't know what I should do at that point. I was troubled with something hazy hanging over my heart. If I were to take stock of things--and, if this man wasn't mistaking me for someone else, then I knew of a girl named ‘Mitsurugi’ and had completely forgotten about her. The question was, who was she, what relationship did I have with her, and how did I end up forgetting her?

Was it because of the accident? The doctor said I had hit my head hard, so was it an after effect of that?

I was absent mindedly lost in my thoughts,

“Are you still going to repeat it?”

The man muttered a few inexplicable words. 

“... Good grief, it's so difficult to anticipate or deduce. It would be fine if you would just act obediently -- but you're still going to repeat it? Just like the disciples of the witch?”  

“Hey, what do you mean by the witch?”

I asked, and thereupon, the man seemed to have realized that he had let a part of his thoughts slip out of his mouth. For the first time, something resembling emotion appeared on the man's face, and he clicked his tongue in disgust.

“A long time ago—there was said to have been a university for witches.”

“...Huh?”

“There, the disciples of the witch would be made to do the same thing over and over again —a recurring theme of my professor when I was a university student. I was told this persistently when I was a student. I guess he wanted to tell me to get back to the basics.”

He spoke that much as if he had accomplished his responsibility to explain, then the man turned his sharp jaw up to the heavens.

“At any rate, I just wanted to see the face of the one that took care of that.”

Saying that, he extinguished the cigarette in a black leather ash disposer, and opened the door of the black limousine. After he climbed in, he looked back at me once more.

“I'm glad you’ve forgotten everything. You saved me a lot of trouble.”

“…What do you mean by trouble?”

In response, the man gave one cold look at me,

“If you’re unfortunate enough to remember something – call me immediately.”

Thereafter, he once again reverted to a low, mechanical tone, bereft of any emotion.

“Next time, I will come to erase it.”



 ◯



I had forgotten something.

Or rather, I had forgotten someone.

Could it be that I had lost part of my memories since the accident? No, the doctors didn't say anything like that. I woke up in the hospital room that day, and next to me was Krishna-san, and even that bastard Sako was there, then I found out that Akane Nanamori had died, and that Karasu-san had died – and after that, what happened? After the man had left, I closed my eyes with my finger stuck in my head, as I desperately traced back into my memories.

It felt... As if I had screamed in the hospital room. That's right, I remember seeing something and trembling with fear, and then I screamed. The shrill voice from that time still clung to the back of my ears. I shouted at someone, “You monster”. At the same time, a tremendous pitch-black feeling of regret seeped deeply into my chest. But that was as far as it went. I have no memory of what happened after that. I couldn’t recall who it was that I had called a ‘monster’. They had vanished from my memory as if they had been sealed away.

I suddenly got scared and started running.

I jumped onto my bicycle, which I had parked in the bike park, and hurried back to my apartment.

The Houdate apartment building was about a 20-minute bike ride away from my university--my crib in Tokyo that Karasu-san had introduced to me: a cheap 10 square meter apartment with an attached loft. I opened the lock and tumbled inside, and focused my eyes on every corner of the apartment.

Sunlight poured into the apartment through the half open curtains, and dust faintly glittered in the light. Familiar clothes, luggage, and bags were carelessly thrown about in the living room. The same state they were in when I left in the morning. I looked around the entire apartment, and I noticed that this apartment had a loft. For some reason, I hesitated to go up there, but after gulping once, I placed one foot on the ladder. I climbed up slowly, step by step, and the moment I looked inside, something glittered faintly in the corner of my memory. However, it disappeared before it could take shape, as if it sunk away somewhere.

The loft was cramped, with a low ceiling and a wooden floor of about 5 sqm.

Of course, nobody was there.

Strangely enough, there was nothing there.
 


...Why, did I not store my luggage here?

...Why, was this space alone so empty?



And right now, why was I—

Crying this much?

These tears that overflowed from both my eyes without stopping, who were they for?




In the end, my yearend holidays passed by without returning to my parents’ home, and I spent them just doing my part time job.

My father and sister kept nagging me to ‘Come back home’, but I felt that if I returned home, something precious that was on the verge of disappearing from my memories would be lost forever, so I stubbornly stayed in Tokyo.


When I was hospitalized, my elder sister was the only one who came running, 『You little… there are limits to paid holidays you know, and it takes a high level of confidence to take them so don’t keep worrying me!』She was shouting at me about that, but I was honestly happy. However, I thought she would stay for a while, but perhaps because she saw Krishna-san close by, she became relieved, 『Sorry for always causing you trouble』as she bowed her head, 『Well, see you Nagi. I have very few paid holidays left. See you on New Year’s.』She ended up leaving with those words. Well…that’s how things went, and she must have thought that I would head back home for the new year as a matter of course. On New Year’s Eve, when I called them to tell them that I wouldn’t be coming back after all, my father and sister grappled for the receiver of the black rotary telephone to chaotically shout at me. But my elder sister, perhaps sensing that my voice had a heavy, cold emotion behind it—suddenly asked.

『…Hey. Are you okay?”』

I fell silent, and my sister also fell silent for a while.

『….Umm…Nee-chan, I…』

When I finally began to open up,

『No, it’s fine.』I was simply told.

『You don’t have to say it. You’ve always been a wuss and a crybaby, but when your switch gets turned on, you become impossibly reckless. At any rate, you went too far, and things became complicated, right?』

『……..』

『I mean, I'll only say this once so you'd better remember it, Nagi. If you think it's seriously dangerous, call me. Call me right away. Without hesitation. Even if it’s dawn or midnight, I’ll come running straight away.』

I felt a prick at the back of my nose.

『But I only have one day of paid vacation left, so.』

『….Alright. Thanks, sis.』

 That was all I managed to reply with. My sister was still on the other end of the line, she said something to pacify my father, and the call went dead. My sister must have sensed that something serious was going on. I had a vague feeling, that if I didn’t do that something now, that it would end up changing shape into something that could not be undone. Even just putting it into words would be enough for it to shift and become something else, then I wouldn’t be able to follow it anymore. I was just thankful that she was able to understand my urgent thoughts.

Yes, I had, indeed, forgotten someone. It felt as if that accident wouldn’t be over until I remembered them properly. The bandages had been taken off, and my right elbow which was in bad shape had healed quite a bit, but a stinging pain would still come at times. I couldn’t help but feel that the pain was Karasu-san being angry at me. In her case, she wouldn’t yell at me, but she would instead smile and place her hand on my shoulder, and say something like, “What are you doing? Get yourself together”. Whenever my elbow ached at my part time job, when I was alone in my apartment, when I was wandering around town, those were the times I felt Karasu-san’s marked presence.

I, myself, wanted to get it together. But how could I tell anyone about these vague signs of lacking memory? Of course, I talked to Krishna-san about my situation in as much detail as I could and asked her. However, the baby-faced occult website manager simply said, “It's because you've been in an accident recently”, and she scolded me, “You have to go back home and show your folks that you're safe.”

Krishna-san seemed busy during this period. It seemed she had decided to continue to graduate school after graduating. I hadn’t seen her at university much recently. The top page of the largest occult website in Japan had changed to ‘Under construction’. The message board where everyone excitedly talked together about ghosts, and the pages dedicated to investigating paranormal phenomena of the past were no more. At times, I would catch sight of ‘Ikaigabuchi’ members on occult threads of a certain large message board, but compared to ‘Ikaigabuchi’, the posts there were a little ill-mannered, and they almost never went into deep thought. I guessed that everyone would eventually end up nostalgic about how cozy ‘Ikaigabuchi’ was. Gradually, I began to see less and less posts on the Internet from people who seemed to know each other.

Then one day-- my neighboring room, room 101, suddenly became vacant.

Some contractors suddenly came and carried away the large collection of Krishna-san’s creepy things. After that, I peeped inside a little when the interior designers entered: the wallpaper had already been reupholstered and disinfected, and the talismans and the shimenawa had disappeared. I had my doubts about whether the negative energy left behind by all those relics would disappear by doing that, but I suddenly thought to myself then.

All the memories I had slowly accumulated in the span of the past year: exciting memories, memories that were terrifying yet nostalgic, they were slowly being swept away by the wind. I felt like someone was saying to me: “They’ll come back to you naturally.”



My heart didn't clear, and a month passed, and then two— it was March, when the plums blossom.

It was the time of year when freshmen filled with hope would soon be entering university in large numbers. I took a peep at an internet occult forum I hadn't looked at in a while, and found that post.

『I found a haunted mansion.』

That was the title of the ghost story. The contents were a record of the exploration of an abandoned house. 『It was a two-story Japanese style house that has been empty for a long time.』『Nevertheless, laughter can be heard late at night.』『Someone was peeping through a tear in the shoji on the second floor.』『Something like a metallic sound would ring out at times.』I laid down in my room and continue to read until late at night, when I suddenly had a flashback.

Come to think of it, in the farewell drinking party for ‘Ikaigabuchi’, wasn’t something like a ‘metallic sound’ mentioned in someone's ghost story? That's right, someone -- or rather, a woman - was peeping through the shoji on the second floor when that story was told. I intently continued to follow the letters as the strange congruent nature of the two stories clawed at the back of my head. It seemed it was an abandoned house where no one had lived for a long time, and luggage was strewn everywhere as if they had run off in the night. In the back of the house was a Buddhist family Chapel, and a child was said to be there. I didn't know how authentic it was, but it seemed that you shouldn't look at the child, or so it said.

The latter half was a little different, but wasn’t this the ‘Overlapping house’ that came up as a topic at that time. Based on researching locations on an old map, it was a house built in a place where six ‘spiritual paths’ overlapped.

I sat up before I realized.

A terrible, damp sweat welled down my back, down my sides.

I read through it once more, but the location wasn't mentioned anywhere. However, back then Suu-san and the others…. that’s right, they said something about a ruined stationery store at the back of City Hall.

My throat stung with thirst, and I gulped once. My heart throbbed violently like it was about to break.

More so than fear, it was as if I alone ended up finding the key to an unopened treasure chest -- and I had a hunch that something precious was inside the treasure box that I needed to take back.




“—Say, don’t you want to go and take a look?”




I swung back in surprise, feeling as if someone had suddenly whispered into my ear.

However, there was nobody in the room. I had been alone in the room since the beginning. All I could hear was the faint sound of cars on the main road outside.

Without pause, I shoved my phone in my jumper pocket. Then I suddenly came up with the idea to take a pocket light out from my luggage. I checked to see if it worked, pocketing it as well, and flew out of my apartment. 

Even though spring was approaching, it was still quite cold and dark outside. And it was almost three o'clock in the morning, when the darkness would be at its deepest.

In the cold air, I sped my bike towards that house.


 ◯


“Man…just where is this so-called stationery shop?”

It was quite suspicious for a young man to be wandering around alone in a residential area late at night. What would I say if I came across a patrolling officer? As my thoughts swirled on such things, I continued to intently search for that house with my hands in my jacket pocket. It was hard to move quickly, so I parked my bicycle in the city hall bicycle parking. After that, I wandered around the residential area on foot for about thirty minutes, but I couldn’t find a building that looked like a stationery shop anywhere. In the first place, weren’t stationery shops supposed to be closer to schools? No, did it go under because it wasn’t close to one?  As I walked along thinking such things, I suddenly crossed paths with some students who were messing about on their way home. They looked at me suspiciously, but I somehow managed to hang my head down and passed them. I felt an awfully lot like a criminal.

I stopped in my tracks for the time being, and carefully recalled the conversation back in the farewell party. ‘Behind City Hall’ was definitely in this area. So, the stationery shop that went under…no, someone mentioned another characteristic---ah, that’s right. Someone said something like, 『The shop which always has its shutters closed』. When suddenly-- I caught sight of a small building with gray shutters. It was a building I had simply passed by many times thinking it was a garage.

“…Hey, is this it?”

I stepped back a bit, and looked at the right side of the building. It was a modern ready-made home two stories tall. The first and second floor still had their lights switched on. I could sense the presence of people from outside. Was this not it? The moment I shifted my gaze to the left side of the building where the shutters were down—a shiver ran down my spine. 

Beyond the darkness, I saw the shadow of a deserted Japanese house that was even darker. 

Weeds were thickly overgrown behind the fence that was no longer maintained. Through the frosted glass next to the brown door, I realized that the interior was pitch dark. I looked up at the second floor but couldn’t see properly thanks to the window being obscured by a torn shoji. As I was about to turn my eyes to the tear in the shoji, something cold crawled up my legs. 

I averted my gaze. Because I suddenly remembered the story of the ‘woman peeping’. I gulped once, and checked around to make sure nobody was around, opened the rusted door, and made my way through the garden stones to the front door. I tried peeping into the mailbox that was installed on the wall of the house and saw that it was chock-full of pamphlets. They had gotten wet, dried and torn, giving the impression that no one had been inside for quite some time now. Thereafter, I gently placed my hand on the front door, and tried pulling it once. Naturally, the door was locked and wouldn’t budge.

For some reason, I was relieved.

I didn’t have the guts as an occult maniac to break locks and intrude into abandoned buildings. I felt as if I had checked the door in search of a reason, that if I couldn't get in, there was nothing I could do.

--Let’s go back before someone finds me.

I told that to myself as I turned my back to the door, when suddenly--

I heard a grating *clink* sound ring out from somewhere. 

With a start, I stopped in my tracks and looked back in the direction of the house. 

--It can’t be, a metallic sound?

Holding my breath, I focused my concentration on the interior of the house once more on the spot. But I didn’t hear it again.

I saw the headlights of a car approaching me from the distance, so I quickly lowered my posture and hid under the fence. At the same time, I heard what sounded like people talking. It seemed it was a parent and child this time. A young mother was walking with her child hand in hand. I felt relieved and at the same time annoyed at the lack of common sense of a mother walking with her child in the middle of the night. No—people all have their own reasons. I mean a student was sitting here crouching in the middle of the night in front of a person’s front door, and I’m sure there must be single mothers out there who are trying their best to raise their children. 

At any rate, I would easily end up being found out if a passerby were to peep in from the street. So I had no choice but to stay low as I steadily followed along the fence and made my way to the back of the house. 

There, I found a place that was right around the size to be called a rear garden. There was a small pond that had no more water left, and a stone hanging lantern covered in moss. I hid myself behind the hanging lantern.

…Ahh, just what was I doing?

I thought as I bit my lip. Wasn’t I just like a thief, crouching down in someone’s garden in the middle of the night? I was surrounded by houses, and could easily be caught if anyone looked my way from some window. If I got reported, it would undoubtedly become a police matter.

--Let’s just go back. Let’s just go back home.

When I ordered my feet to do that, those words suddenly appeared in my head. 




『But you're still going to repeat it? Just like the disciples of the witch?』




Those were the words uttered by that stranger in front of the university that day.

That unknown noh faced-man of unknown age who stepped out of the limousine said that there used to be a university for witches in the past somewhere, and that the disciples of the witches devoted themselves to repeating something over and over again. So –what was that all about? What did he mean by ‘going back to the basics’? What did those words mean to that man, and why did they resonate so strangely within me? In the first place, just what was that man…? I didn’t have any acquaintances who would show up in a limousine, and I didn’t recall any daughter of h—

Thereupon, a shadow suddenly emerged in my head.

…It was a person.

A black silhouette – I didn’t know who it was.

But they stared at me forlornly, and continued to whispered something repeatedly.

“….Who….?”

Forgetting that I was brazenly intruding in someone else's garden, I reached my hand beyond my memory.

“…Who are you? Hey, are you related to that man? What does the university of witches mean? Just what are the disciples repeating there?”

Of course, I had not wished for a clear reply. I didn’t expect an answer.

However,




(That was, to search for the origin of names.)



“….Eh?”

From somewhere, I heard the clear voice of a young girl, like a ringing bell.

(The Scholomance university of magic – a legendary university said to have existed somewhere on the Balkan Peninsula in ancient times. There, the disciples of the witch only had one thing to do. That was to research the real names of all events and creatures in the world and their history.)

“W-who—is it?”

Flustered, I turned around, but there was no one there. Only the faint light of the moon poured down on the dimly lit courtyard. 

Before I realized, a blue-white crescent moon peeked out between the clouds. It was such a beautiful moon that for a moment it seemed as if the moon itself had called out to me. A liquid darkness poured down from the moon, blue and azure, and filled my surroundings. And, I could feel the presence of someone right beside me. Someone I couldn’t see, but whose presence was strong and nostalgic. 

“…Is someone—there?”

I asked the question with a trembling voice and white breath to my surroundings, but there was no answer.

However, that presence was markedly there, beside me. There was a slight warmth in the midst of the crisp winter air. 

Tears gradually welled up from the depths of my eyes.

“I…know you.” 

In the stillness of the night, my sobbing voice leaked out.

“I’m supposed to know you, but… why did I forget everything…?”

The presence did not answer the question.

Only the sound of an unknown insect filled the surroundings.



(Say, did you hear that?)




However, after a short period, I was asked in return.

(…It’s that sound again.)

Thereupon, I realized.

Once more, from somewhere---no, from inside the house, *Clink* I heard a metallic sound ring out.



(Even though no one is living inside this house.)

(That sound...)

(It continues to ring out from somewhere in this house.)




My vision blurred more and more as the voice softly reached my ears.

Before I realized, I had vacantly raised my face, and stared at the second floor of the premises.

On the other side of the window.

The torn-up hole of the shoji – the darkness.

From there, something looked down upon me with a hollow gaze.

I was seized with the thought that the ground under my feet swayed, and the dots of my vision were becoming coarser.

I wondered if it was all a dream.

Could it be that I was still in a hospital bed?

A dream, a dream, a dream…Ah, that’s right, everything felt like a dream. I used to think that the source of my fears was the dream mansion I saw again and again—And, I thought I had crawled out of there, but could it be that I was still dreaming? This was a dream where I stood in someone else’s garden, a dream where someone else’s voice echoed despite me being the only one present.

The moment I thought that, tears spilled down my face; There was no other conclusion to be made except that.

“…I’m still…”

Was I still broken? Could I not tell reality from fiction?

In that moment, something cold touched my hand. And I understood that it was someone’s hand.

(That’s not it.)

The whisper of the young girl sounded in my ear.

“…Not it? Then?”

I heard a rustling sound, and the invisible young girl stood up.

She slowly approached the deserted house as if stepping on the overgrown weeds.

……Ah.

“…W, wait for me.”

I stood up.

“What do you mean by that’s not it? It’s obviously strange, isn’t it? I can’t see you. Despite that I can still hear your voice. I can even understand what you’re saying…”

(Reality and fiction—there are no humans in this world that can clearly distinguish that boundary.)

“……”

(The reason why is because humans live in their minds, and the world the mind believes in is the one and only reality.)

Those words made me feel shaky on my feet.

The world the mind believes in—that’s right, it’s always been like that. When confronted with something unbelievable or an impossible phenomenon, the ‘common sense’ present at the very heart of one's psyche becomes unstable. It begins to doubt: Just what was the ‘common sense’ that shaped our everyday lives? That is the greatest common experience, what you would call everyday law. ‘Common sense’ is a collection of ideas that are accumulated over the course of a person's long life that make things go smoothly. However, in rare instances, individuals appear who transcend that. They are called heretics, abnormal, and in net slang, ‘denpas’. However, was that really the case? Could you say that they were wrong? Didn’t we deny their theories and ostracize them to escape the fear of our own ‘common sense’ collapsing? Didn’t we merely place a lid on the things that were suspicious just to keep our peace? 

To live in accordance with ‘common sense’—that would be far easier, and the smart thing to do. However, that was the same as being stagnant. It takes courage to break out of stagnation. You had to face the insurmountable fear directly, and strike it head on. It was also a fight against people’s prejudices. It was easy to run away from that. It would be easy to avert your eyes and forget about it. It would be easy to pretend that it never happened. However, even if you lost your memories, and ignored it with your head, your heart wouldn’t be deceived. And now, my heart was—

Resonating with something forgotten.

Right, it was resonating with you who I couldn’t see. 

Before I realized—

I stood up, and reached my hand towards the void.

The tip of my hand touched someone’s cold hand; Someone’s eyes glittered bewitchingly.

‘Welcome to the world on this side.’ Is what I felt I was told.



 ◯



--This was crazy.

I was doing something completely insane. I was breaking into someone else’s house in the middle of the night, and talking to someone I couldn’t see.

No one would believe me if I talked to them about this, and they surely wouldn’t understand either. But despite that, I still couldn’t give up for some reason. I was helplessly afraid, yet helplessly excited. It felt as if my rightful place was here, beyond this darkness.

Both of us(In reality it might have just been me, but I dare say so) entered the house through the verandah. The sliding storm shutter had corroded, and easily came off with a little a bit of force. From there, we climbed down to the carpet that felt moist with our shoes still on, and propped the shutters up again from inside. With this, it won’t look like it’s been removed with a quick glance from the outside. 

The interior of the room was surprisingly wide—although, that was because the first floor was a tatami-matted space with almost all the fusuma’s thrown wide open. Similar to my parents’ home, the layout was partitioned by fusuma’s and shoji where deemed necessary.

A sour odor drifted through the room, was it because trash had been left somewhere? After taking several steps, I remembered and took the pocket light out of my pocket. I pointed it at my feet and switched it on. There lay several magazines and clothes strewn about. A fusuma that was broken had been removed and propped up against the wall, and an old electric fan lay tumbled over in the corner of the wall. For some reason, I aimed my light here and there and got startled.

Countless talismans were plastered over the lintels. Some were already peeling off and some were torn. 

“W...what is this?”

(They’re talismans.)

“No, I understand that. I’m asking why there are so many of them hung up like that.”

(The residents must have been afraid.)

After the young girl’s voice whispered in an echo—she continued, ‘However’.

“…However?”

But she didn't continue, and my surroundings continued to be filled with silence.

“…Hey? However what?”

But there was still no reply. I thought she might have ended up going somewhere, but when I stayed still and looked around, I realized her presence was a little further ahead of me. For some reason, it felt like she was biting her nails, but eventually, her presence turned to move in the direction of the kitchen.

(…This house is interesting.)

As if lured by that somewhat joyous voice, I stepped over the scattered luggage and nervously stepped into the kitchen.

(Why was so much luggage left behind?)

“Eh?”

(Dirty dishes.) (Worn out toothbrushes.) (Discolored vegetables.)

It seemed the invisible young girl was speaking of things she saw in the kitchen sink one-by-one.

(Toy trains.)

…Toys?

I, too, drew close to the sink, and peered inside.

Sure enough, there were several pieces of rubbish strewn about, and a wooden toy train was lying amongst them.

(Torn magazine pages.) (A torn shoelace.) (A doll’s arm.) (A piece of paper.) (A jar of salt.) (Dead insects.) (Sand.) (Rubber bands.) (Scraps of packaging.) (Citrus peels.) (Cup noodle packaging.) (One sock.) (Bookmarks.) (A discolored photograph.) (A ball with no air.)

“A trash house… well I wouldn’t go so far as to call it that, but it’s definitely close to one.”

When I said that,

(A hoarder.) The voice spoke.

(One of the anxiety disorders—people who can’t throw away things or put things away -- the root cause being trauma of having been abandoned by someone in the past.)

“Are you saying the resident of this house was that kind of person?”

When I mentioned this, I remembered. In the first place, wasn’t this house noticed as a place where six spiritual paths overlapped?

When I asked about it, a voice echoed in the darkness.

(Spiritual paths are just paths. They exist everywhere. In a country with so many temples and shrines, it’s impossible to avoid living in places where they connect and intersect.)

“Then, just why on earth is this house--”

As I was speaking, I noticed it. It was, how should I say…

…A strange smell of blood.

I puckered up my face and sniffed unintentionally, when—

(Don’t turn around.)

The invisible girl's words made my body freeze with a jerk. For some reason, I felt a cold chill at my back. I held my breath, and slowly turned my gaze from the sink to behind me.

…….Eh?

Directly behind my sneakers – was someone’s feet.

(Stop breathing.)

…B, breathing? Why?

That’s what I thought, but I was already in a state where I couldn’t breathe anymore. I had no idea what was going on. In the darkness, someone’s skinny bare feet were stuck close to me.

…H…hey, wasn’t no one supposed to be in this house…?

My body was as rigid as a rock, my gaze unable to move from the bare feet that were right behind me. The skin of the feet was discolored blue. There were no fingernails, and they were sore in places, and, for some reason—Ah, why was it?

They were both right feet.

The moment I realized that, I let out a shriek, “Eek!”. At the same time, my stiff body loosened. I turned around as I stumbled forward, and aimed my light at my back, but there were no feet there anymore, there was no one. 

In the silence, only the sound of my breathing echoed. As I desperately took the oxygen in me, I aimed my light here and there with trembling hands. The shadows of different types of trash stretched out creepily, but nowhere amongst them was anyone barefoot with two right feet.

“….H, hey, what… was that just now?”

At long last, I was able to speak. Before I’d realized, the bloody smell had vanished.

“…You saw it, didn’t you? What… was that thing just now?”

(…Who knows?)

The invisible girl close to me spoke once more.

(But, there are still two more.)

“…T-t-two more, you say?”

(Above.)<italic>

With that voice, I nervously aimed my light at the staircase at the end of the kitchen. 

There, illuminated by the light, an old wooden staircase extended upwards into an even deeper darkness.

“…H, hey, let’s stop now.”

I spoke in a trembling voice, however, without hesitation, the presence headed in that direction.

A creaking sound reverberated, suggesting that the invisible girl had placed her feet on the stairs.

(It’s on the second floor.)<italic>

“…Second floor? What is?”

But the girl did not answer, only the creaking sound of the staircase echoed upwards.
At that moment, I heard a sharp *clink* echo from somewhere inside the house once more. In an instant, something inside me shouted, ‘Stop right now’. Nevertheless, my feet slowly proceeded towards the darkness. 

As I slowly ascended the steps firmly one-by-one, I remembered. Come to think of it, when I was in the courtyard a while back, it felt like something was peeping out of the shoji on the second-floor window. What on earth was that….? And was it somewhere upstairs on the second floor?

As I moved my trembling legs one after the other, I reached the top of the stairs, and aimed my light.

The air was heavy. And -- it was overwhelmingly dark. It was dark enough to swallow my light whole.

I took one gulp, still desperately trying to regain my breath, and first checked my surroundings.

Roughly speaking, the second floor seemed to have three rooms. However, like the first floor, each of the three rooms was not independent, but merely separated by fusuma. However, the fusuma was torn at various places. In the darkness, something beyond the darkness of the torn fusuma—

Suddenly, the ground shook.

No, my legs had begun to tremble.

Beyond the fusuma—that’s right, I was afraid of the secret of my childhood, locked away inside the darkness.

“…If I could just, open it.”

Before I’d realized, I was muttering out loud between the gap of my teeth as if I was grumbling.

“….I might be broken… But, if I can open that, I’ll be cured… That’s right, by doing that… I returned to being normal… so once more…  it’ll be fine if I open it again… I’ll open it…”

Encouraging my legs that were on the verge of collapse, I drew close to the fusuma, step-by-step.

I placed my trembling fingertips on the fusuma, and with my eyes closed… opened it in a single breath. Then, a burning smell spread around me. I slowly opened my eyes a tiny bit, and aimed my light---

Ahead of me, was just a tatami matted room about 10 sqm in size.

“…S, see, look.”

I breathed a sigh of relief, and at the same time, I once again noticed that something still smelled.

It wasn’t just that the stagnant air had not been ventilated for a long time. The air itself was ridiculously heavy. 

And, I realized that the tatami was billowing. 

As if drawn to that, I aimed my light down towards the floor. I strained my eyes and gasped.

It was hair. Long jet-black hair creeped along the tatami. 

I couldn’t believe what I was seeing right now. It wasn’t hair that had been cut off. It was as if it had grown out of somewhere, filling the room with darkness, and a bloody smell.

From somewhere, a *clink* sounded.

No, it was as if it had been echoing continuously for a while now. 

It was as if I had only been hearing that sound at the edge of my consciousness, and paid no attention to it.

If people lived in a world their minds believed in—

Then what would happen to people, when their minds no longer believed? If the things they saw, and the things they heard—if they became unbelievable all at once…what would people use to stay standing?

As I was petrified in place—

I traced along the direction of that hair with my pocket light in a daze. And when I recognized a Buddhist family chapel in one corner of the wall, I heard my heart violently thumping. I averted my eyes instantly – but at long last, I finally recognized the thing I saw the moment I opened the fusuma. 

Something was there.

It seemed to be a woman.

It felt as if her feet from her ankles down were bluish-white, and she had no toenails.

Her hair hung down and covered the entire floor, she stood still facing the wall, her back was turned towards me, and—

“-A…Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!”

I screamed. I screamed as loud as I could. By screaming, I was trying to stimulate my ears, my senses, to bring back reality. I wanted to deny the entirety of the thing in front of my eyes as an illusion. 

And the next thing I knew, I ran off and almost rolled over. 

I kicked various things away that were scattered on the floor, bumped my shoulder into something, but ran despite that as I tumbled down the stairs. I descended to the ground floor and closed my eyes as if pretending not to perceive the marked presences, and dashed towards the sliding storm shutter. With a violent crash, the sliding storm shutter fell outwards, and I simultaneously collapsed out on the veranda. I had already hit my body here and there, but it was trivial. Even if I had dropped an arm or two on the spot, I would have left it there. I was shouting something, but I didn’t care about being reported anymore. Or rather, I was scared to the point where it would have been better for my screams to be reported and an officer to come. 

The woman with her back turned who I saw just now, was horrifying, the metallic sound that seemed to be chasing me was horrifying, and the thing most horrifying of all, was the me just now who had been exploring the ruins of a building until now together with an invisible, unidentified ‘voice’. Once again, I heard a *clink* ring out from somewhere, but I didn’t look back anymore, instead, I ran out of the grounds of the house as if trampling over the fence.

I ran out to the street and kept running and running all the way to Itsukaichikaidō where many cars were passing by.


 ◯


What happened?

No—what was happening?

My heartbeat slowly returned to normal together with my ability to think.

Right now, I was sitting alone on a bench set up on the sidewalk along Itsukaichikaidō, with my hands clutching my hair. 

Despite it being late at night, there were countless bikes and cars passing by on the road. There were students walking along the pavement laughing with each other. It was peaceful to the point where someone like me, trembling by myself over a ghost, looked comical. However, I was still worried about whether my head was functioning properly. 

Slowly and gradually, I recalled the events that took place in that house.

I heard the whisper of an invisible young girl behind the hanging lantern in the courtyard. As if lured by her whispers, I entered that house.

The ‘Overlapping house’ – a metallic sound echoed there, a house where six spiritual paths overlapped. Countless pieces of junk had been gathered up inside, and who knows how many old talismans were plastered on the walls. There, I saw a strange pair of feet…or so I thought. On the second floor, it felt as if I saw a woman with her drooping hair covering the entire floor. Was I normal at that time? Was I not broken once again? Was it all a delusion, borne from being distraught with fear? Even the repeated metallic sound must have been an auditory hallucination, or the rattling of the house. That’s right, didn’t Krishna-san always tell me? That ninety-nine percent of ghost stories out there in the world are lies, delusions, or misunderstandings. 

Thereupon, I recalled the words of the girl whose voice I could only hear.

It was when I was looking at the junk in the sink on the first floor, and looked back at the thing with the two right feet behind me. 

The young girl said: 『There are still two more.』 That’s right, there was something on the second floor. It felt like it was a woman. But ’two more’…. Wasn’t that the end of it?

However, I recalled back that far, when a cold, chilling thought came down to me.

No—that wasn’t it….

The last person she meant… could it have been…




(Why did you climb up to the second floor?)




The moment that voice reached my ears once more, I jumped up.

“….Guwaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!”

I screamed shamelessly, managing to hold myself back from falling off the bench, and looked to my side to see—

That the presence of the girl from that time was markedly present next to me. 

I was slowly brought to tears, and with my mouth half open, 

(Say, why did you go to the second floor by yourself?)

I heard her voice once more, and clasped both of my hands together and raised them up in prayer.

“I…I’m begging you, please go to heaven… It won't do you any good to haunt me. Not at all.”

In response, a small gasp of exasperation escaped from next to me.

(I’ll only ask once more. Why did you go to the second floor?)

“W…why you ask…? You…said…above…that it was on the second floor.”

I continued to speak.

“I know already. You’re the third one, aren’t you? What are you trying to do by possessing me? If you’re gonna possess and kill me, then hurry up and do it. This slow way of doing it… have some mercy.”

In reply, the voice declared something unimaginable.



(I never said above, nor did I say that there was anything on the second floor.)



….Eh? 

Thereupon, I realized with a shudder. Didn’t she just ask, 『Why did you go to the second floor alone?』

So that meant---Eh…?

(I was on the first floor. I was thinking about the association between the countless presences, the metallic sound that continued to ring out, and the direction of the affixed talismans. And then I understood. Those diverse items in the sink weren’t things that couldn’t be thrown away.)

“….What…?”

(It was the opposite – they were things that had been gathered to comfort a child.)

Those words—made goosebumps run all over my body for some reason. 

A child…Yes, a child.

The online posts I read in my room also said that there was a child in that house. 

And that you shouldn’t look at that child…

(That was the third—no, the most malicious ghost of that house.)

…..

(Did you catch sight of a child anywhere?)

In that instant—I remembered.

When I was crouching in the doorway of that house, I recalled a mother and child passing by me with their hands clasped together.

At that time, I felt something strange. That’s right, why were a mother and child walking together in the middle of the night?

“You can’t possibly mean…”

(You saw it, didn’t you?)

“No, I don’t know if that was it…but, I saw a mother and child in front of that house.”

(That's where the entrance is.)

“…”

After gulping down once, I asked:

“Just now, you said that you understood, but—just what is it that you understood about that house?”

(I believe it’s true that it is a house of overlapping spiritual paths. Because it is said that when the spirits pass through the walls, a sharp metallic sound rings out.)

“…..Ah.”

(But that’s not all. The people who lived there were struck by all kinds of inexplicable phenomena, going so far as to post talismans. However, you must post the talismans in a specific direction. In that house, all the talismans were all posted on the north side. That would make it impossible for the spirits to exit. Inevitably, they would accumulate in that house. You often see bait sold that’s used to lure cockroaches and keep them in place -- but this house was constructed similarly.)

“…Then, what was the deal with that child?”

(I don’t know.)

The girl spoke.

(They say there are times when ghosts merge with each other—but that was different. It was something originally not human, something that took the appearance of a child and existed there.)

“…..”

(In addition to being a house of overlapping spiritual paths, there was intense traffic of ghosts—Fearing that, the talismans were posted, but in the wrong way—the spirts accumulated —they continued to accumulate, continued to overlap, mere painful thoughts that continued to accumulate and thicken—that crystallization.)

‘However’, said the girl with a trace of happiness in her voice. 

(It’s wonderful that such incomprehensible things still exist in this world.)

I was left dumbfounded by the innocent tone of her voice, when—

It felt as if the girl stood up without making a sound.

“H…hey.”

In a panic, I called out to her, but the girl’s presence gradually moved away.

“Hey, wait a minute. Just who the hell--”

Who are you?

The moment I was about to ask that, it felt… as if the girl stopped a little further ahead of me. 

(I forgot to mention it, but you are not broken.)

Her voice was somewhat kind as it reached my ears, echoing in the silence of the night.




(Because – you can still ‘fear’.)







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==Translator's notes and references==
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