Editing Talk:Ghost Hunt:Volume1 Prologue (section)

= Editing =

I'm not certain if this article has reached this point yet, but I've edited Yuuri's and Mai's ghost story.  The edit is as follows:



The room was dark. The blue glow of penlights moved around, trying to flood the room with its timid light, only to be incapable of doing so. One light stopped upon the silhouette of a girl's face, holding the light so that her face was illuminated from below. The faint sound of rain could be heard, and the voice of the girl chilled through the lonely sounds of the falling rain.

"This is a story I heard from my uncle once before.  One Summer, my uncle went to the mountain with a friend of his. They walked, aiming to get to the summit of the mountain," she paused for a moment, "and you know, the weather was nice.  Even though the two of them had been to the mountain once before, they seemed to have lost their way.  They should have arrived at the top in about three hours, but no matter how long they walked, they couldn't reach it.

"Regardless of this fact, they kept on walking, hoping that they would arrive at their destination. It wasn't long that a completely unknown mountain ridge appeared before them, and they did not know where they were anymore. They decided to turn back --- taking the route from which they came --- but after walking for a while, they returned to the unknown ridge once again. No matter how many times they tried to go back, they always returned to this unknown place.

"It was not long until darkness fell.  They had no choice but to camp at that place."

No one could open their mouths.

"So, the night came and they set up camp. They were sitting by the campfire, chatting, when they heard a man's voice.  A voice calling out for help.  The two of them looked around for the voice's owner, but they did not see anyone.  They called out to the man, but to no avail.  And, just when they thought it was just their imagination, they heard the voice again.  This time, it was closer than before.  They searched again, but, like before, there was no one to be found.

"The same thing happened time and time again, with the voice drawing closer each time. The voice got so close to them that the voice was coming from the campfire. His breath, the patting of footsteps, and even the wind ruffling against his clothes could be heard, but they still could not see the source. As anyone would, they got a very bad feeling about this.  So my uncle's friend began chanting a [[Ghost_Hunt:Volume1_Translator%27s_Notes#Namuamidabutsu|namuamidabutsu]] prayer. All the sounds started to fade.

"The two of them couldn't sleep at all that night; they awaited the morning's dawn.

"In the morning they realized that near the camp there was a cairn."

"Cairn?"

"Yeah. A man died in the mountain, and someone piled up some stones at that place instead of leaving a grave. That's called a cairn. You see, the cairn was about the height of a man. It was impossible to miss it. Still they didn't notice it the day before.  He probably felt lonely and tried to invite them... or something like that.  I still wonder what could have happened if my uncle's friend didn't do the 'namiamidabutsu' prayer."

Yūri finished her story, her voice dying with the rain patting against the ground.  She quietly turned off her penlight.  Another two lights remained lit inside the room.

"Next is Mai," Keiko suggested from the darkness.

I, being the expert among the group, started my story.  "It's a story I heard when I was a grade student.  It was night, and a woman was walking down a street to go back home. It was autumn, so her body got cold midway.   She needed to use the toilet.  She was near a park and thought she could use the public toilet in there.

"A public bathroom at night doesn't feel right, does it?  Because it's dark and all...

"Although she didn't want to, she went into the park and then into the restroom. Out of nowhere, she heard a voice calling out."  I made my voice high-pitched and tremble a little, "'Do you want a red mantle?'"

"No-o!" Someone screamed.

I continued, "that woman, totally frightened, left the stall ...but, the door was stuck.  The door jolted and again she heard the same voice, 'Do you want a red mantle?' She batted against door with all her might, but it didn't open.  And, when she heard the voice for the third time, she answered 'No, I don't want'. Right after that the door opened quickly."

The group was silenced by the story.  Only the weak rough noise of breathing mingled with the sound of the rain filled the room.

I continued with the story, "The woman got out of the restroom with haste and was so scared that she just couldn't go home by herself.  It was then when she saw two patrol policemen passing by.  She greeted and told them about what happened. They explained, 'That was probably a molester who hid himself. We will need your help.'  So she had to go inside again.

"Before she entered the stall, the officers instructed her, 'When the voice asks you again, please say yes.'  Then the woman entered the stall, and soon she heard the creepy voice, 'Do you want a red mantle?' She answered with yes. And at the same instant, a terrible scream spilled into the midnight silence.  The door shot open, and the woman there was dead."

Raindrops. Only raindrops...

"She was covered in red, as if she were wearing a red mantle, stained with the deep red color of blood.  Her body was mangled so that it looked like the pointer of a compass, full of small holes."

Everyone screamed.  And with that, I turned off the penlight.

Only one light was left...  Only one blue light was still shining...  Michiru started her story.



I just want to make certain that I'm not attacking this too soon, that it's to BakaTsuki's standards, and to make certain I'm not taking too many liberties with the original script.

[[User:M|M]] 20:53, 16 March 2008 (PDT)