Editing Kamisu Reina:Volume 2 Yukimi Mitsui (section)

===2===

"Who do you think you are?"

A few days after I started feeling something bizarre about Reina Kamisu, I was suddenly approached on the corridor during lunch break. The girl who approached me didn't show the least of restraint and just blocked my way, seething with irritation.

An attacker. There's no doubting it.

However, the attacker isn't one of my classmates, who must have accumulated frustration against me, but a freshman named Sakura Kawai.

"Hah? Careful what you say now!"

If it's a real attack and not just my delusions, I can counter to my heart's content and ensure that the attacker will stop in the future.

I can fight. Even though I might get hurt in the process.

Sakura Kawai, however, doesn't wince. "I know about the dirty look you're giving Reina-san!"

"Filthy look? What are you talking about?"

"I think I expressed myself clearly enough! I don't know if you're jealous, but would you please stop looking at Reina-san like that?"

"Jealous?"

She's right in that I often look at Kamisu-san. I have been watching her even more these days because I wanted to find out the cause for what's bothering me about her, in addition to my urge to be vindicated, but she couldn't be farther off by calling this jealousy.

"Know your place, okay? Even if you're the student council president, you're still younger than me. Don't you think you're a bit insolent?" I argue.

"I don't wish to be rude toward an upperclassman, either, but there are things that I just can't let pass."

"Things you can't let pass? And that would be me, or what?"

"Yes! Just think about it. Reina-san is a wonderful person. I have so much respect for her, she's my inspiration".

Ah, so Sakura Kawai <i>is</i> one of them. It's obvious looking how she follows Kamisu-san around everywhere: Sakura Kawai is a firm "believer" of Reina Kamisu.

The number of Reina Kamisu's "believers" at this school is everything but small. No, you could say they're the majority.

It might be a nasty comparison, but if one were to compare Reina Kamisu's charisma with poisonous gas, the gas would be so strong that breathing in 0.1mg would be enough to kill a person with a likelihood of 99.999%. If released in a town, the whole town would die out. In addition, the virulence would be extremely high as well; just touching an infected person would get you killed.

I'm exaggerating? Perhaps. But anyone close to her would unanimously nod at this comparison.

Anyway. Being locked into this closed environment, Reina Kamisu is fulfilling and corroding the school without leaving out a gap.

What's the obvious consequence?

Reina Kamisu attains an absolute status within this small community. As a matter of fact, she <i>is</i> the law and driving force at the Junseiwa School.

"I... no, <i>we</i> won't let you get through with this! Scowling on Reina-san... Aah, I'm disgusted just by thinking of it! Anyway, we won't let you look down at Reina-san! No one can deny her. What makes you think that someone as petty as you could?"

"...What did you just say?! Besides, you're completely wrong. I'm not looking down at her at all."

"I'm not deceived that easily!"

"But you're really wrong!"

"Cut out those lies!"

It's no use. This girl won't listen no matter what I say. She is already firmly convinced that I'm looking down on Kamisu-san.

But that's not true; I have great respect for her as well. After all, I'm just another member of this small, closed community.

Therefore, I'm not looking at Kamisu-san with scorn.

—<u>Unless the odd thing I'm feeling about her is of a negative nature.</u>

"...Look, it seems like you know what I'm talking about," Sakura Kawai reproaches me with conviction, apparently having noticed the slight doubts that showed on my face.

"...It's a misunderstanding!"

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Just apologize and swear to keep your eyes away from her!"

My patience is wearing thin. Who does she thin she is? She means nothing to Kamisu-san; it's not like she's her family or even just a friend of hers.

"Hmph! Even if I <i>did</i> scorn her, what of it? I wouldn't be bothering anyone with it, would I?"

"What did you just say...?"

"If someone is bothering Kamisu-san, then it's certainly not me, but you guys who stick to her like fish shit!"

"W-What?!"

Sakura Kawai's face turns red like a tomato.

—Oh no.

She isn't the type of attacker who gets afraid and stops attacking. I knew that and should have retreated at the right time, but I accidentally continued to hold against her.

And right now, I rubbed her the exact wrong way.

It's too late. She's going to keep attacking me, keep hurting me.

And on top of that—

I got too worked up and forgot who she is.

"...I went too far," I say apologetically, but my words don't reach her. She isn't open to apologizes anymore.

"...you scoffed at <u>us</u>."

Plural.

Right, this attacker is—<u>the student council president.</u>

"I will not forgive you for this..."

Her wailing before was a thousand times better than this. Now there is a deep, hateful tone in her voice that gives her hatred a firm shape.

Ah, it's over.

Up until now, I've simply been reacting over-sensitively to ambiguous remarks, interpreting them as attacks against me. Of course, some of those remarks must have been really directed at me, since I'm the type of person who makes herself a lot of enemies. However, in the majority of cases, it was just my overreacting that got me hurt.

But this is going to change now. I'm going to be under fire from all sides for real.

"She's making me angry," "What an insolent bitch," "Get out of here," "Piss off," "Go die in a fire," "Go west," "Die."

I'm going to really get such insults; after all, this attacker right before my eyes is the student council president. She's the second most powerful person here. If Sakura Kawai openly announces that she won't forgive me, then the number of attackers will grow. She does have the authority and the social network to do just that.

To make matters worse, Reina Kamisu's "believers" have uniform beliefs. If one of the central authorities like Sakura Kawai says that she won't forgive me, then the other "believers" are bound to share her will.

Inside this closed environment, it is an absolute taboo to get on the wrong side of Sakura Kawai.

Reina Kamisu treats everyone equally, but her followers can't emulate her deeds. Jesus Christ said that if someone slapped you on one cheek, you should turn to them the other also, and yet the believers kept waging war. That's how it works. Sakura Kawai has the power that it takes to unite everyone against me under the pretext of protecting Reina Kamisu.

She is aware of that, too, and that's why she was able to act so bold against an upperclassman like me.

"...I'm sorry."

However, as expected, my apology only adds fuel to the flames.

"...Prepare yourself! I will teach you that there is no place for you in this school anymore," Sakura Kawai proclaimed.

That's not a threat. It's a decided fact.

In a few days from now—I will have no place anymore.



Once I got home, I shut myself into my room, plunked into my semi-double bed, and buried my face in my pillow.

"Aah..."

It's over... I can't take this anymore...

This place was a painful, exit-less box to begin with, but now I'm going to be lynched by everyone on top of it; even though all I want is not to be attacked, not to be hurt.

That's just horrible: If striking back in order to protect myself angered the other party so much that she now unites everyone against me, then what should I have done instead?

I don't know the answer, but I've always had a hunch that things would eventually come to this; that someday, someone would hate me for good and initiate an organized attack against me. At the very least, I had deemed it more probably than North Korea making an onslaught on Japan.

...<u>I've always had a hunch that things would eventually come to this?</u>

But that means that I didn't have a chance to begin with.<!-- Possibly wrong translation. Can't quite follow Mikage's train of thought here (p24)  -->

Fuck! Fuck! Are you kidding me?! Why does nobody treat me gently?! Why does nobody understand me?!

No, that's wrong... It's all my fault... I know, I know!

As I continue this pointless and endless train of thought, I clutch at my pillow so hard that it almost bursts.

<i>Goddammit!</i>

<i>Knock, knock</i>, goes my door all of a sudden. It must be my sister judging from the sound pattern.

"What?" I ask bluntly toward the door.

The door opens and my little sister, Yoshino, enters the room. "Um..." she mutters reluctantly as I scowl at her, still lying on my bed.

"Get the <i>fuck</i> out of here if you've got no business!" I shout, turning my frustration at my weak sister who is 3 years younger than me. As always.

"I-I am sorry..." she apologizes despite not being at fault.

A thought suddenly crosses my mind as I gaze at my downhearted sister: she will certainly lose all her self-confidence because of me and become a dejected person.

I'm sorry for that. But I'm not in an easy situation either, so it can't be helped, can it?

"So, what is it?" I ask again.

"Um, someone has come over to see you..."

"Someone...?"

Sakura Kawai crosses my mind.

Was she not satisfied with attacking me just at school? That's absurd... but I haven't made myself any friends that would go out of their way to come over here. So... it's well possible that Sakura Kawai is already done preparing her attack on me and has come here.

No... Please not! Don't torment me any more than this!

"...Onee-chan... quick..."

"I know! Just shut up!" Yoshino winces again at my sharp voice.

<i>Yes, that's right! It's Yoshino's fault. I've only gotten myself into this situation because her lack of resistance gradually made more offensive!</i>

While casting the blame on others in my head, I push Yoshino aside with my right hand and walk to the entrance.

What am I going to do? How am I going to handle this situation? I can no longer defend myself by attacking, that's for sure, but I don't know any other way. I'm not deft enough to ward off an attack. I'm the type of person who deliberately gets hit by a bullet in fear of the gunshot that would follow; that's why I have to take care of the attacker before she can fire a bullet no matter what!

Full with despair, I open the door and look the the visitor.


Time stopped.


"—Huh?"

I unwittingly react with the clichéd act of rubbing my eyes in disbelief and look once more at her.

"Hello," she says. <u>With an absurdly beautiful smile.</u>

"—Kamisu-san?"

"Please excuse my sudden visit, Mitsui-san. I take it that I must have surprised you?"

"I don't mind... but what brings you here?"

I try guessing her reason to visit me... but I fail to come up with anything plausible.

Kamisu-san treats everybody equally.

Of course, in her eyes I'm just another equal person. Therefore, there is no reason why should would come visit me.

However, as a matter of fact, she stands right before me, smiling.

"Would you be so kind as to let me in? While I do not mind talking right here, I am sure that you had rather take a seat and not have your family hear our conversation."

"Y-Yes..." I say, left with no other choice but to approve. While her way of speaking is incredibly polite, she doesn't seem to tolerate any dissent.

"..."

What is there to get so flustered about? Cool down: a classmate has come over to my place, that's all.

However—

Everyone who knows Reina Kamisu—or has just caught a glimpse of her at some point—will inevitably think the following: <i>there must be a reason of utmost importance for her visiting me. A reason deeper than the reason of life itself.</i><!-- Liberal translation. "Deeper than the meaning of the Yasukuni Shrine." -->



I lead Kamisu-san to my room. Her every movement seems so harmonized that looking at her from this short distance disrupts the rhythm of my own heartbeat, making it pound randomly. As I wonder how many millions of yen one would make by selling her beautiful black hair to a jeweler, I let her into my room.

"What a lovely room," she praises me with a sincere smile, gently satisfying the pride I have in my room layout. She managed to stir me just by praising me.

I ask her to take a seat on my precious red sofa. She accepts my offer politely and sits down in a manner just as beautiful. For a while, we talk about my room, until Yoshino comes in and brings us some black tea in stead of my absent parents. Confronted with Kamisu-san's beautiful face, however, Yoshino gets startled and blushes as Kamisu-san gives her a smile.

After waiting for Yoshino to leave and taking a sip of the black tea, Kamisu-san says with a smile:


"It has come to my attention that you have been watching me in a peculiar manner lately."


While attempting to calm down my racing heart, I look closely at Kamisu-san but fail to read anything off her mild expression.

<i>"I know about the filthy look you're giving Reina-san!"</i>

I start to ponder. If Sakura Kawai's complaint is the general consensus and not just a result of her deluded mind, then it would be highly probable that Kamisu-san feels offended by my gaze as well.

What if the will to harm me lies hidden beneath her perfectly adorned smile? No, that's not a "what if".

Kamisu-san came over to my place. Why? Simple.

<u>To attack me.</u>

"Ah, please excuse me. I do not mean to blame you," she says, probably to a certain degree guessing my internal train of thought.

<i>She might be lying</i>, I apprehend but the fact that it's "Reina Kamisu" who is saying it makes me calm down anyway.

"I am just curious to know what causes you to watch me like that."

"Did you come all the way here just to ask this...?"

"Among other things, yes," she nods.

"Why didn't you approach me at school...?"

In response to my question, she puts on a wry smile and replies, "You know Sakura-san, do you not? Certainly she would not be eager to see a conversation conducted between the two of us."

I see, she's right. Sakura Kawai is always hovering over her; it makes sense that she would have gotten wind of our conflict today.

"I do see where you are coming from, Kamisu-san... but I'm fairly sure that I'm not the only one watching you. What makes my case so special to you?"

"Yes, there are a lot of people who are watching me, but while those gazes might strike others as 'strange,' they are actually fairly common for me. For instance, I am very used to being approached like I was by your sister before."

I think I see her point. The looks Sakura Kawai gives her might be abnormal seen from others, but as someone exposed to them on a daily basis, they become ordinary and lose their abnormity.

"So... in other words, you are saying that the way I'm looking at you is odd even on top of that?"

"Yes, I suppose you can put it that way."

"OK, let me be blunt: are you troubled if I watch you?"

With an unchangingly mild expression, Kamisu-san shakes her head. "As I said, that is not my intent. In fact, the reason why I am here is probably the exact opposite of what you think it is."

"...The reason I think?"

"I do not intend to 'attack' you."

"Eh...?"

—Did she just say 'attack'?

Sure, I always and everywhere feel attacked, but most of that is just me picking up random sentences and interpreting them as attacks. No one other than me can possibly know about it

And yet—Kamisu-san clearly and readily said 'attack'.

"I know that Sakura-san is about to proceed against you. Therefore, I feared that you might fall into the mistaken belief that <i>everyone</i> is now set against you."

Ah, I see... Silly me, I just got ahead of myself. It's not at all surprising that she would use the term 'attack'; the 'attacks' I used to imagine to myself are becoming real starting today, after all.

In other words, my gut feeling that <u>Kamisu-san has known all along that I'm hurt</u> is nothing but an misconception.

...just a misconception.

"I am sure that it would be very sad and tough to consider yourself threatened by everyone. If, by any chance, there are other people joining Sakura-san in attacking you, then it will merely be a temporary trend. Neither will those attacks continue forever, nor should you care about them. I have come here to tell you this."

"...But knowing that doesn't make it any less painful when everyone denies me."

"All right, I promise."

"What do you mean...?"

"I promise to stay on your side."

<i>Huh—?</i>

I find myself awfully confused; after all, it's <i>Reina Kamisu</i>. The person who treats everyone as equals. What would prompt her to become my ally of all people...?

"Although I am sure that is no comfort to you..."

"But yes! Of course I couldn't be happier—"

—<i>but why me?</i> I think but I am unable to add this question.

"That is a relief. Ah... that reminds me, you have not answered my question yet."

"Your question...?"

"I was wondering <i>why</i> you are watching me."

"T-There's not—" I stutter as I give it some thought myself.

That feeling I've been having toward Kamisu-san is not admiration for her beauty or wits, or anything else positive. If the looks I've been giving her bore a positive connotation, then Kamisu-san wouldn't take special heed of them and call them "odd", since she's used to positive glances.

Therefore, I suppose there <i>is</i> ill will in my glance, and that's also why Sakura Kawai took action against me.

"—There's not much to it... at least I can't put my finger on it."

As a consequence, I couldn't give her an honest answer even if I were able to put that feeling into words.

"You do not not know, either... I understand," she says, and then she smiles. <u>As though that question never happened.</u> "All right, I think it is time for me to take my leave."

"Mm..."

We stand up and go to the entrance. Even something as mundane as putting on one's shoes turns into a captivating ceremony if done by Kamisu-san.

And even after talking so much, that strange feeling I've been having toward her hasn't disappeared.

No, if anything—

"Well then, goodbye Mitsui-san."

"Yeah, see your tomorrow at school."

After waving at me once, Kamisu-san disappears on the other side of the door.

"..."

On the other side. Yes, she and I, we stand on opposite shores and live in different worlds.

There's one thing that keeps me thinking: if there really is ill will in my glances, and if even Sakura Kawai noticed that ill will, then is it at all possible that someone as intelligent as Reina Kamisu would <i>not</i> notice, despite being directly concerned?

But then, why would she so clearly suggest to remain on my side whatever happens? How can she promise to support me, not to do any harm to me, when she noticed that I'm an attacker to her?

At the very least, I couldn't do that in her position. No... <u>we</u> couldn't do that.

"Hey, Yoshino?" I ask my sister who has been sneaking peeks at Kamisu-san.

"W-What is it, Onee-chan?" she says, wincing in fear of being reproached for her watching us.

"I'm not angry. I just wanted to hear your opinion on the girl that just was here."

"Ah, okay..."

"Yoshino. What impression did she make on you?"

Unsure what kind of answer I'm expecting of her, she only groans, "Um..."

"Don't worry; just tell me your first impression."

"O-Okay... I thought that she is pretty."

"...Well, fair enough."

It's a perfectly valid opinion—and probably the only thing she can say because she's afraid of offending anyone.

However, against my expectations, Yoshino wasn't done yet.


"So pretty that I can't believe she's human."


And thanks to that remark—I finally recognized why I felt like chewing on aluminum when seeing Reina Kamisu.