Editing Hagure Yuusha no Aesthetica:Volume 5 Chapter 4 (section)

===Part 3===
 
"------------!?"
 
The shock woke Listy from her sleep.
 
"Haa...... Haa......!"
 
Along with her shortness of breath and dry throat Listy was able let out a noise. Then Listy looked up.
 
The interior of the room was familiar. It was Listy's office. She was sitting at her desk. She finally understood, it was all just had a dream.
 
-- After the duel in the arena, Listy indeed returned to the waiting room alone.
 
And then reflected on the feeling of Akatsuki's kiss.
 
But everything ended there, Akatsuki never went to Listy's waiting room.
 
...... To have that kind of dream......!
 
Listy bit her lower lip, and reminded herself to remain calm.
 
Akatsuki was absolutely still alive. There was no reason not to believe in him.
 
...... But that embarrassing dream......
 
Listy was blushing. A dream was said to be a way to realize a hidden desire. Could it be that her wish was for Akatsuki to do that kind of thing to her? Though she was embarrassed, at the same time she felt a little relieved that it stopped at a kiss. It would of gotten awkward if things went further then just kissing. Anyway......  
 
"No matter how tired I am...... there is no room to doze off at a time like this!"
 
Listy couldn't help, but shake her head and sigh, but it wasn't a mystery. Since Akatsuki became the new Demon King, and formerly declared war on Disdiya she had almost lived a life of sleepless nights.
 
She had already found no signs of Zechs in the room, and then Listy suddenly remembered. After hearing the whole story she asked Zechs to leave, because she wanted to be alone for a little bit. As she was thinking of what to do from now on the cumulative fatigue of the past several days finally caught up to her, and she fell asleep.
 
The facts that came out of Zechs mouth surpassed by far what Listy could ever have imagined.
 
-- However, after a few hours of sleep for first time in days Listy's head was clear.
 
Therefore Listy began to face the truth again anew.
 
First of all -- was the inner darkness Leon had.
 
He was bound by hatred and then those thoughts drove him mad. In Listy's mind the most appropriately word to express how she felt about the matter would be "regret."
 
The culprit behind -- the murder of the royal family, both her parents and relatives, was none other than Leon. That cruel fact hit home the hardest. However, Listy had come to terms with the grief of losing her loved ones, even knowing that the real murderer was Leon she won't bring herself to direct her hatred towards him. To begin with it was the royal family who chose the path of war with the demons, without doing that perhaps Leon may not have been driven into a corner.            
 
"But --"
 
Listy thought even if she could sympathize with him, she still couldn't accept his behavior. Leon lost to his own hatred, caused by the weakness of his mind. Listy won't blame Leon for that weakness, but also can't defend the way he handled it. Leon was not the only one to lose his family because of the war. There were a lot of people in the same circumstances, even Listy was among them. No matter how much sadness and bitterness was in your heart, you should have grit your teeth and looked to the future. To strive to live every day is the responsibility of those who survived. In Leon's case there was a trace of regret in her heart for being so close to him and yet unaware of his suffering.
 
...... I'm sorry Leon.
 
Listy had learned the sad truth about her former fiance -- yet she was still able to keep calm.
 
-- Why? Listy was fully aware of the reason.
 
There was a definitive answer that all this time hasn't changed.
 
A dark secret she never told anyone.
 
For Listy, the Hero Leon was her fiance.
 
But -- she didn't have any romantic feelings towards him.
 
 
 
-- Of course, it didn't mean she hated him either. Leon was always gentle, had a strong sense of justice, and in everyone's opinion was the prefect person fit to be the Hero. Listy also agreed. There was no way she could hate such a person. In fact she spoke favorably of him.
 
However, is speaking favorably of someone tantamount to love? The answer is definitely no.
 
A royal marriage was not the crystallization of love, rather purely an obligation.
 
All for the purpose of continuing the prosperity of a country. Therefore if Zechs's distinguished military services got him recognized as the Hero, Listy's fiance would have been Zechs instead of Leon.
 
However, Listy never intended to object to the matter. Since she was born as a member of the royal family, she would carry out her royal obligations. And Listy was determined to act like Leon's lover, all to please the soldiers and the people of her country. So she did what was expected of her.
 
But.......
 
One day -- Listy's quiet life encountered a storm.
 
It was her unexpected run in with Akatsuki.
 
Even thinking back now, it was still the worst meeting. At that time, Listy was taking a bath, when out of the blue Akatsuki fell on top of her stark-naked. For Listy having been seen by the opposite sex, also having her body touched as well was her first experience. She was angry enough to kill him on the spot, but having learned that Akatsuki was summoned from another world she was able to control her anger somehow. And that was how Akatsuki became a guest of the castle, and began living under the same roof. Everyone within the city walls would take care to treat Listy respectfully, fearing the slightest offense. However, Akatsuki's frivolous attitude and casual tone when interacting no doubt set off a series of exclamation points. In those days, she thought it was almost every day that she would get angry at Akatsuki. However, it was because of his influence she was able to learn how to express her inner emotions, and gradually find her true self. Those days,
 
....... Life was really enjoyable.
 
As a princess of a country it was hard for Listy to spread her wings, yet Akatsuki easily freed her from her birdcage. Usually he appeared to be free-spirited, but occasionally when no one was around revealed a look filled with worry that was almost painful. After she discovered an unknown side to Akatsuki, Listy gradually couldn't take her eyes off him.  
 
Then one day, Listy became self aware of her feelings. She liked -- Akatsuki.
 
However, such thoughts were not allowed. To not let anyone notice her feelings Listy buried them deep in her heart. For people of royal lineage it was a sign of pride to be able to repress your emotions.
 
In some shape -- her lie was also the same.
 
Just like how Akatsuki considered herself and Sherfied, and decided to hide the truth about Leon.
 
Listy also chose to hide her true feelings.
 
But on that day -- when Galious attacked the capital of Sherfied, Erudia. After she saw Akatsuki run out from the castle, Listy let her feelings override her reason for the first time and promptly chased after him. And through looking everywhere in the rain she found Akatsuki safe and sound, and was immediately relieved from the bottom of her heart.
 
However, Listy lost too many things that day. Both her parents and relatives, the castle she grew up in, and the country she must defend were lost. And the hope of the country Leon died. It was all too much. The despair pushed Listy to the edge of a complete collapse, but at that moment one thought emerged from the bottom of her heart.
 
-- I will do anything to not lose Akatsuki.
 
It was her biggest fear.    
 
She can withstand the loneliness of Akatsuki not being by her side, but not the pain of parting forever. So she rejected Akatsuki.
 
All for the sake of pushing him to return to his own world faraway from Alayzard.
 
Listy chose to lie.
 
 
 
-- Its all your fault that any of this ever happened.