Editing Kamisu Reina:Volume 2 Reina Kamisu (section)

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Her gaze pierced through the one-way mirror all the way to me.

Surprised by this now unfamiliar feeling, I found myself looking at her before I knew it.

Mitsui-san...?

She is not looking at me anymore, but I am looking at her and even paused putting my schoolbooks into my bag.

What was that? Did I see things?

"...Reina-san? What's wrong?" Kawai-san, who has come all the way to my classroom just to hear my performance, asks suspiciously.

"...No, never mind," I answer wearing my mask again, but it seems like Kawai-san has already realized that my surprise was a special sign.

After our short exchange, I notice that Mitsui-san has already left the room.

"Excuse me, Kawai-san, but there is something I need to take care of at home, so I would rather not play the piano today."

"Huh? Ah, yes ... of course, if you are busy."

With these words, I bow my head to her and secretly pursue Mitsui-san. She has not joined any club and does not seem to have a lot of friends, so often goes straight home. I hurry to the shoe lockers.

I found her.

While she is busy changing into her outdoor shoes, I walk up to her. Noticing that someone is approaching, she turns to me.

"Kamisu-san...? Is something wrong?"

"No, I was just in a little hurry because of a pressing matter," I explain and observe her. In an unobstrusive manner, of course.

<i>Aah, it is as I thought.</i>

Mitsui-san is looking at me right through the mirror. There is no doubting it.

"...Goodbye then, Kamisu-san."

"Goodbye."

I part with her in a natural manner.

It feels like it has been a long time since someone other than Sakairi-san last saw me, not "her". Mitsui-san did still project something else on me, so it is still far from sufficient, but she is definitely different from Kawai-san and the others, who are entirely blind of me.

...But why Mitsui-san?

I am not particularly intimate with her. Well, I am not intimate with anyone, but she is one of the people who barely have any contact with me. She is just a classmate.

Is the answer hidden in her nature, then? She is a very aggressive person because of her vulnerability. She believes that everyone wants to do her harm,  which is why she has drawn a defense line to protect herself in the event of a real attack. But ... how is that related to the way she looks at me?

"———"

I try contemplating for a while, but I am entirely lost. There are two less leads.

Besides, is there even a point in finding out?

Perhaps there is none, but now that I have become unable to completely deny "her" existence, it strikes me as important to find a way to discern people who see "her" from those who do not.

If I do not take measures, "she" is going to take me in.

I have not admitted "her" ... I think. But ... as a matter of fact, I accidentally talked to "her". It is as clear as the day that this mistake is going to help "her" to pervade me slowly but surely.

Being taken in by "her". While I do not know if that is a good thing or not, I am neither enlightened enough nor desperate enough to willingly surrender myself to an unknown being.

<i>I suppose I will have to talk to Mitsui-san in person...</i>

I waited on a moment that lent itself to talk with her about it.

However—there was no indication of such a moment to come.



My momentary surprise when first taking notice of Mitsui-san's look turned against me in an unexpected form. Kawai-san, who had astutely observed my slight change, also noticed that Mitsui-san's gaze was different. That would not be an issue in and of itself, but for some reason she mistook Mitsui-san's look as one of scorn.

Because of that, Kawai-san and Mitsui-san have made enemies of each other.

It is impossible for me to disregard Kawai-san's will and become friends with Mitsui-san. As someone who exists for others, I do not have any freedom.

At any rate, it has become difficult for me to approach Mitsui-san.

What should I do? Can I even earn something by approaching her?

I do not know, but ... I feel that it would be wrong not to act when at last I have a reason to.

Therefore, I looked up her address and went there.



Although not as big as ours, the house in which Mitsui-san and her family lived was a quite magnificent brick house and was suitable for a student of the Junseiwa School.

I rang the doorbell and was answered by the lovely voice of a girl, who was probably Mitsui-san's little sister. After I told her why I was here, she briefly said, "The door is open. You may wait inside if you like," and stepped away from the intercom. She must have gone to call her big sister.

Accepting her offer, I walked to the entrance. This would not be necessary in the case of normal houses, but because there was quite a distance between the gate and the entrance, I would have otherwise made Mitsui-san unneeded work.

For a while nobody came. Considering that her sister answered the doorbell, it was possible that they had not employed any housekeepers. They did seem to have their house cleaned from time to time.

While I was gazing at the expensive-looking objects and handicrafts, Mitsui-san arrived and looked at me with blatant bafflement.

"Hello," I said as gently as possible to reduce her caution.

"—Kamisu-san?"

Apparently, my effort to get her guard down ended in a failure, but she was so kind as to take me to her room. Unlike my room, hers was only equipped with the things necessary, which was quite to my liking, and I also praised her for that. After her little sister had brought us some black tea and she had lowered her caution a little, I decided to go ahead and ask her.



"It has come to my attention that you have been watching me in a peculiar manner lately."


Much to my surprise, her expression changed abruptly. <i>Is she aware of the fact that her look is piercing through my one-way mirror? Or is she aware that hers is different from the looks of others?</i>

<i>No ... I suppose not. She has practically been threatened by Kawai-san. She must think that I am blaming her. She is that kind of person.</i>

"Ah, please excuse me. I do not mean to blame you," I assured, trying to calm her down. I also said things to the effect of not intending to attack her and staying on her side, which, for some reason, seemed to surprise her.

Is it so surprising? Even though I am just putting on masks that happen to fit the situation?

This is odd. Does that mean that she was not really looking at me, after all? If she was, then her current attitude makes no sense. Her attitude suggests that she does not know what kind of person I am and what kind of actions I take.

She is not deflected by the one-way mirror and does not see that thing that resembles me. But what if that is all there is to it?

"Ah ... that reminds me, you have not answered my question yet."

Right, what matters is not how she thinks of me but why she is looking at me in this way.

"Your question...?"

"I was wondering <i>why</i> you are watching me."

"T-There's not..." She pauses for a few seconds and continues. "—There's not much to it ... at least I can't put my finger on it."

She seems to be telling the truth.

"You do not not know, either ... I understand."

That means that there was no point in coming here. In that case, I have no business here anymore.

"All right, I think it is time for me to take my leave."

"Mm..."

I stand up and see myself in the mirror.

—No, I see "her" who resembles me.

She is smiling. <u>With a beautiful smile like mine.</u>



Aah—

—It cannot be undone.



The bitterness of biting a coffee bean spreads in my mouth. This bitterness may belong to "her" but it is something different. I don't know this. I don't understand this. I don't admit this. But I do recognize it. I am also aware of the fact that I pretend not knowing the answer. I want to keep feigning ignorance. But now that I can see "her" beautiful smile, I cannot suppress it anymore. I instinctively know what "she" is going to do ... no, what I am going to do using "her", and I also know that it is morally reprehensible. But I cannot control it. There is no one to stop me. I am "she" and "she" keeps accelerating me.


I am not interested in the individual—

—and the individual is not interested in me.



"She" is smiling. "She" is calling me.



＊＊＊


Unable to gain anything from approaching Mitsui-san, I lost to reality.

I face my mirror. I face "her" who resembles me.

"I believe that the evil witch in Snow White lost to herself."

I start to talk to "her".

"Mirrors only reflect. If you ask it who the fairest one of all is, you will only receive the answer you believe yourself. The witch lost faith in being the fairest and thus the mirror answered Snow White. And then she tried to kill her with a poisoned apple."

"But ultimately, even if Snow White had deceased, the mirror would have never again said that the witch was the fairest. It would have continued to say different names, because the witch had admitted Snow White's beauty and with it the possibility of others being more beautiful than herself. The mirror would not have given the answer the doubtful witch sought."

"What might the point of telling me this little allegory be?"

"Mirrors only reflect."

"That is true."

"That means that you are me and I am you."

"You are stating the obvious."

"Yes, so it is impossible to escape from you."

"Yes, because you are longing for me."

"Longing for you? Even though I do not know what you are?"

"You claim not to know what I am? Even though you have a fair grasp of my nature?"

"But I have not understood you entirely. I need an explanation."

"I suppose you do," "she" smiles inside the mirror. "I am a phenomenon."

"What kind of phenomenon?"

"A phenomenon called 'Reina Kamisu.'"

"That is my name."

"Yes, it is. But what else would you call me?"

"Point taken," I smile.

"I am a phenomenon with no powers other than being visible. A phenomenon that can be given a role by naming it."

"But if you are 'visible' then you must be linked to something, right?"

"Yes, I am linked with the Form that is based on beauty."

"The theory of Forms."

"That might be a close term for it."

"Are you independent?"

"To almost no degree. I am dependent on other beings and I lack the ability to reflect and to actively update information. I do, however, have knowledge and I do obtain a consciousness when taking shape."

"The ability to update information?"

"Even I have to adapt in order to persist. For example, when I speak your language, I make use of your knowledge to transform raw information into words. Since my hosts, which are you human beings, are in permanent change, I have no other choice but to change with them."<!-- 「私とて私を維持するためには、まったく変わらないわけにはいかない。例えば私は、言語を使う際にはあなたたちの知識を利用し、形の定まっていない情報を言語に置き換えている。依存体、つまりあなたたちの情報が常に書き換えられている以上、私も変わらざるを得ないのよ」 -->

"In other words, information is what links you with us?"<!-- 「つまり情報とは、私たちとリンクをする際の条件？」 -->

"This is not everything that it entails, but it certainly is part of it."<!-- 「一概(いちがい)にそれだけでもないのだけど、それも含まれているわ」 -->

"It is difficult to follow you."

"As I said before, I am transforming information into language, so my words are lacking accuracy."

"It is no different for us! I also often feel restricted by the imperfection of words. But that aside ...  if you are connected to us in such a way, do we also suffer from any side effects?"

"I suppose that because of my remoteness to your common world view, there is a chance that you might lose it by 'seeing' me." <!--「そうね、あなたたちの一般的観念から遠い私を〝視(み)る〟ことで、一般的世界観を失う可能性はあるでしょうね」-->

"Which means?"<!-- 「すると？」 -->

"Your world view is a filter of sorts. By sending information through it, you are able to process data smoothly and without falling into confusion. Did you know that if you are born blind and have a cornea transplanted, you may not be able to see anything even though your eyes are properly functioning?"

"I think I have heard about that."

"Why is that? It is because they cannot process the information gathered by their eyes! People who have been born blind lack the practice of 'seeing' and therefore do not know how to cope with the light sent through the cornea. They cannot filter the information. As a result, they see nothing."

"In other words, by 'seeing' you we are forced to cope with the kind of information that would normally be filtered out by our subconsciousness?"

"Yes. As a result, you might fall into confusion, stand out in the world that is defined by the common world view, and mistake your selection of what information to filter out."<!-- 「ええ。その結果混乱し、一般的価値観によって作られた世界の中で浮いてしまうし、情報の取り入れ方も間違えやすくなってしまう」-->

"Has that already happened to me?"

"Who knows?"

"This sounds synonymous to 'insane' to me."

"That is another way to put it."

"Am I insane?"

"I cannot deny that."

"Quite honest, aren't you?"

"However, you have already defined me as true."

"That alone is the truth."<!-- 「それだけが真実」 -->

"There is no such thing as universal truth, though."<!-- 「元より真実なんてものは、その範囲内でしかないものだけれど」 -->

"Sadly, you are right."

"Well then, let's get to the point. What role have I given to you? Why did I wish for you?"

"Do I even need to say it?"

"I suppose not. After all, you are <i>Reina Kamisu.</i>"

"Yes, my role is—you."

"Your role is—me."

"I am the you who you believe has been lost inside others."<!-- 「私は他者の中で失われたあなた。あなたがそう思っている存在」 -->

"Yes, you are the most perfect and beautiful and inanimate mask I have ever created."<!-- 「そう、あなたは私が作り上げた、最も完璧(かんぺき)で美しい、無機質な仮面」 -->



""That is why others will see <i>Reina Kamisu</i> when they look in these eyes.""<!-- 「「だから他者は、その瞳(ひとみ)に〝神栖麗奈(かみすれいな)〟を視(み)る」」-->



"You then wished for me."

"I subconsciously wished for a perfect mask. By obtaining a new self, I wanted to lose my interest in others because they would only ever ignore me."<!-- 「私は無意識に完璧な仮面を望んだ。私を無視する他者への興味を、別の私を持つことで失わせるために」 -->

"Because it would make you relentless."<!-- 「そうしてあなたは残酷になる」-->

"Lose my interest in anyone."<!--「誰(だれ)にも興味を失う」-->

"Lose your sympathy for individuals."<!-- 「誰かに対する情を失う」-->

"Lose my soul."<!-- 「魂を失う」 -->

"Therefore, my role is—"<!-- 「だから私の役割は──」-->

"Yes, your role is to go against this world that turned me into this. To be—"<!-- 「ええ、あなたの役割はそんな私を作り上げた世界に対する──」-->



""—a tool of vengeance.""



＊＊＊



I became aware of the being that is <i>Reina Kamisu.</i>

I became aware of my tool of vengeance.

And the moment I became aware, I lost my powerlessness. I was set free from the control of others.

Even better, I am now freer than anyone else and can even soar up to the skies.

I am in a position where I can easily have my will.

After all, I have become one with <i>Reina Kamisu</i> and can freely make use of her.

This is how I use the perfect mask that is <i>Reina Kamisu.</i>

Or perhaps it is how <i>Reina Kamisu</i> uses me.

Either way, all that is left is to head straight for my goal.

Until everything crumbles into dust.

Until I crumble into dust.