Editing Watashi Tachi no Tamura kun:Volume1 Chapter1 (section)

===Part 4===


Air conditioning—

Shaved ice, fruit juice, popsicles, watermelon... fruit juice, shaved ice, fruit juice, watermelon, popsicles, fruit juice!

Air—Conditioning—!

If my life continued like this for another two weeks... what would happen to me?

The correct answer is—

"Ughhhhhhh... I'm... going to get diarrhea..."

I slowly crawled forward as I pulled myself out of the steamy bathroom that was just like a sauna. The floor of the hallway seemed to be emitting an icy chill, and I couldn't help but collapse on the ground with no desire to get up.

"Ah! Really. Don't just like there! We'll have guests over in the minute!"

Mom's slippers made squeaky noises as she walked past me.

"Guests?"

"Apparently it's Takayuki's girlfriend."

"W-What?"

I exerted my back muscles, and strived to pick up my head.

"Takayuki's... girlfriend?"

"Yes! That's why you shouldn't laze around there. Go back to your room!"

What was that supposed to mean? No, more importantly—

"Wait a minute. Isn't Takayuki in sixth grade? How does he have a girlfriend?"

"It seems like kids are maturing early these days. One really can't stand it, right?"

"I-Is that really so...?"

I had nothing to say. After losing like that, my willpower and strength to live on just collapsed onto the floor like big words.

Mom ignored me, who was collapsed on the side, as she busily cleaned up the kitchen, boldly unpacked and threw away the offerings from Chugen<ref>Chugen: A japanese festival where gifts are given to ancestral spirits. I'm not quite sure if this is the same as O-bon(?)</ref>, and took care of the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Calpis|Calpis Soda] as she hummed a song.

"Hey..."

This wasn't interesting at all.

"Humm hum—should I put the flowers over here?"

This wasn't interesting at all.

"Hey! I still have diarrhea! I'm not interested in this kind of thing!"

"What? Who cares about you?"

"Huh?"

I was shocked. She actually said such mean things out loud. Was she really my mom?

"You're getting what you deserve! If you eat and drink like that every day just because it's summer vacation, of course you'll get an upset stomach! I've tried to stop you before! But aside from that, what's with all your fuss? Are you wasting your intelligence?"

"A-As the mother of three kids, how can you talk about wasting intelligence?"

"Well the sauce isn't bad!"

"Don't talk about the sauce!"
<!--Really need a TLC above these lines-->

Before I knew it, I was filled with a flaming rage. I deliberately stomped up the stairs loudly and returned to my room on the second floor. Anyways, there was no reason to let guests encounter a premature kid like me. I'll just go hide in my room!

"Oh, Yukisada? Your older brother was asking if you saw his dictionary?"

"Just go buy him another other!"

I slammed the door shut with a bang. The wind chimes that hung down from the door rang with lonely jingles.

"Honestly..."

When I entered my room, a gush of cold air vaporized the sweat that covered my body. By rule, I left the air conditioning on in my room all the time to preserve the cool temperature, even when I left my lair and had great formalities with other beings on the way to the bathroom.

I laid on my cool and refreshing bed and buried my head into my pillow. So, so comfortable! Summer vacation was the best! Even though I had diarrhea, summer vacation was the best season.

Well, that should have been the case...

But—

Why wasn't I happy at all?

"It's because I'm about to become an exam candidate..."

I half-answered myself. But, that should be entirely true. I felt unsatisfied, bored, and hollow inside... completely because I was about to become an exam candidate.

I glanced out the window, and saw that the midday sun had just passed its apex. The sun was currently roasting the asphalt with its fiendish broiling rays. Huge cumulonimbus clouds were surged and rolled up, unmoving as they hung from the sky. It was quite a picturesque midsummer sky. Hypothetically, if I opened the tightly shut window, the hysterical cries of Aburazemi cicadas would probably pour in! I thought about asking Takaura if he wanted to go together to somewhere like the manga shop, but in this weather, it was impossible gather up motivation to go out with anyone.

So because of that, the only thing there left to do was—

"Ah..."

I was already somewhat aware of the truth. Apart from sitting like an obedient exam candidate at my desk, I didn't have any other choices. I half rolled off of my bed, and with great difficulty dragged my lazy and heavily sagging body to the chair. I faced my desk, took out my half-completed mathematics workbook, and began twirling my mechanical pencil with my fingers—but before long, I leaned my chin powerlessly against the workbook.

I felt that it was impossible to keep going like this. I understood very well this was the crucial moment; the fated momentous battle for victory that had been built up. The person who took control of summer took control of tests! So, now was about the time I should start seriously focusing on studying—
<!--Need a TLC above.-->

I got an idea.

To motivate myself, I could go gather some intelligence. If I got to know who my rivals were, I'd naturally be able to come up with countermeasures.

I started up the power core for my desktop computer, and tossed my mechanical pencil off to the side. I'd look for countermeasures of dealing with exams that have been tried in the past until today, and filter for information that met my requirements in order to get ideas. This was a legitimate way of preparing for exams... I think. I waited for the computer to boot up, and then pulled up a search engine on the web. My keyboard clicked with a series of tapping noises as I typed.

High school entrance exam... spacebar... public... enter... and there we go!

There were, woah, 49400 search results returned! There's no way I can look through all of this! I'll come back later to take a look at this! That being said—!

Right, there was that!

Since I turned on the computer already, I might as well try satisfying my other intellectual curiosities! That's a plan.

"Boobs... spacebar: ...sample images..."

En~ter.

"Woah... 225400 results... wow... w-wow.... this is..."

So this was the truth...

The first dynasty... rising disorder. Going to... Kamaura...

"Ah—"

When I came back to my senses, the scary thing was that twenty minutes had already passed.

These curved and delicate bodies were so shocking they could deprive people of their sense of time... I wiped my forehead. At the moment, I had no patience for thinking about the merits and demerits of interactive media for studying, so I went back to surfing the net—

Tappings sounds came from my keyboard.

Without really thinking, my fingers moved on their own as they typed, distractedly smushing keys like I was a person talking on the phone while typing.

There was no real meaning to it.

I wasn't in the mood to do math. I wanted to keep playing on the internet a little more. Could you say this was me simply wanting to escape reality? Or was I killing time even though I was clearly very busy?

"Matsu - kawa - Komaki..."

I stopped.

Honestly, I didn't really mean anything in particular. Nothing at all.

"Huh?"

My heart leaped for a second.

In merely a split second, I felt my entire body go cold. Basically, I lost my color and went pale.

The familiar white search results screen was spread out with text. As I stared at the screen, I tried to keep my mind calm, but my body didn't listen at all.

What? What? I repeatedly kept muttering this to myself. What? What? What? What? What? Why—?

Thirteen results.

The text was blue, and the captions of the links displayed newspaper and tabloid websites I was very familiar with.

September 15th, 2001.

Dentist, Matsuzawa Hirotsugu (44). Dentist, Matsuzawa Yōko (43). Eldest son, Matsuzawa Wajin (18). Received severe traumatic injuries all over their bodies. A curve in the road with poor visibility. Went over a cliff. Eldest daughter, Matsuzawa Komaki (12) is still undergoing treatment. A tragedy for a family of dentists.

I heard some incessant clicking noises, and only afterwards I realized that my finger on the mouse was trembling somewhat strangely. I told myself to stop and stop, but I couldn't control myself at all. "I don't understand, wait! I haven't read that part yet!" Even though I thought this was, my eyes continued to fly and sweep over all the text. I even tried to consider if this was a family of someone with the same name. But their ages were the identical, and I couldn't imagine there'd be two people in this world who would choose that kind of name. 

But. But. But. It was an accident that resulted in death?

An entire family of three died, leaving behind Matsuzawa Komaki?

"Don't—"

Don't joke around. How could something like that actually happen?

Three years ago, she would have been in sixth grade. How is it possible that she lost her entire envelope of a family, and was forced to into loneliness all by herself...

I covered my mouth like a girl.

This, really happened—?

Was this really a truth that had been weighing on Matsuzawa?

I tried to imagine it, but I couldn't do it. The hairs on my body were standing on end, and I had already lost all my rationality. 

"It's the same! It's the same as before, so give up on it!" I didn't know who said this. But I agreed that I should back off, because that girl had seriously told me that it wasn't my problem. Yet, was I going to repeat that entire thing again anyways? If I repeated it with the same actions, I'd only regret it in the end—

"Well, then I'll just regret it—"

My words blurted out.

These fierce feelings were similar anger.

My skin felt like it was peeling off as I stood up from my chair. I rummaged through the drawers, and pulled out an address book. The phone numbers were no good. I needed the address so I could memorize it. It wasn't far... I could do it.

I was trying my best.

I bounded down the stairs, and my sandals... I shouldn't wear them, they're no good! At that thought, I turned around and kicked off my sandals. I stuffed my feet into sneakers and crudely tied the laces.

I opened the front door and ran outside. The scorching sun under the sky was so bright that I could barely keep my eyes open. I used all my power to wildly sprint ahead. My skin felt slightly aggravated like it was being roasted in an oven, but I couldn't care about this kind of discomfort. I told my feet to run faster, faster, and even faster.

Please!

"Matsu... zawa...!"

I didn't know what I could do.

Maybe it would be better if I don't do anything.

But—

But, why?

Matsuzawa!

<i>I can't restrain myself from going to see you! I can't control my desire to confirm your existence. I can't stop my legs from running. I don't care what you think about me, but I can't help but act this way.</i>

Run, run, and run! I turned along a corner, and was headed towards a small townhouse. It was probably that one, but for some reason, I couldn't see very well. My steps staggered as I leaned against the wooden enclosure wall. I wanted to to confirm the name on the door plate, so I squinted my eyes and tried to examine it—

Just then—

"Mhn? Eh?"

The colorful scenery before me suddenly seemed to blur into sparkles. It started to twist, swirl, and then... it seemed like I was flying.

What happened?

The world just became a rollercoaster.


"He's really an idiot, an idiot!"

"Ah..."

"If he goes running in 36°C hot weather, anyone's body would suffer problems!" <ref>Approximately 97°F.</ref>

"Ah... I'll be sure to tell him that."

"In short, wait for his body temperature to come down, and make sure to rehydrate him. Afterwards, just let him rest in peace."

"Okay."

That was definitely Matsuzawa's voice—

Soon afterwards, a pure white face covered my blurry field of vision.

Huh? I mean... what happened, Matsuzawa?

Hey... I haven't seen you in a while. You've picked up some weight and fat... Huh? H-H-How was that possible?! 

"H-How sad! You've become bald!"

"Mhn..."

"Mambo!"

I extended my hands towards the sparkling smooth head, and exclaimed.

Then, a short period of silence followed.

"That's... not me!"

"You're awake?"

There were two voices that came from my left and right. It was like stereo surround sound speakers. Matsuzawa's sound came from the right, and the other came from the left. The bald head was on the left, and the direction I had reached my hand towards was also the left. In other words, the baldy was not Matsuzawa.

"Oh... it's not you. That's great..."

I sighed with a lot of murmurs to myself. Then, who was the person on the left? The person with the shiny head and plump figure? White clothes, spectacles, stethoscope... I had a faint guess, but I wanted to confirm it first.

"Excuse me... who are you...?"

"I'm the doctor!"

I was right. The other thing I wanted to confirm—

"Is this... your house?"

"Mm." Matsuzawa nodded.

"When I was hanging up the laundry, I saw Tamura-kun running here from the balcony... I watched and watched, and then you fell. So I dragged you inside and called the doctor. The doctor said you nearly got heatstroke."

Heatstroke...

When I thought about how useless I was, I had nothing to say. No wonder why my head hurt like crazy. My kness also hurt a bit, and when pulled aside the comforter, I noticed there was a serious abrasion on my forehead. It looks like I literally was "dragged inside". But... what was this? There was a fairly sized bruise on my calf.

"Sorry! On the steps of the main entrance, I dropped you several times..."

Matsuzawa's eyebrows drooped like the kanji, "八", and she became silent. Don't worry about it, Matsuzawa... Seeing how I foolishly charged out my house just to end up falling on the side of the road, who knew how many types of an idiot I was? If you dropped me or threw me away, it wouldn't be a big deal...

"Did you bring your insurance card? If you didn't, we'll need to add some medical fees."

Resisting the urge to tunnel back into the blankets, I responded to the "shiny" doctor.

"I can bring my insurance card to pay it in full later..."

"I understand. Then, come to the Second Suzuki Hospital. Okay?"

"Okay... My name is Tamura Yukisada... Oh I wanted to ask her...... um, Matsuzawa!"

"Yes...?"

"May I use the bathroom in your house? I was very shocked when I thought you turned bald, so now my stomach is very upset!"

Terrible! Terrible! Terrible!

I struggled to stabilize my footsteps as I listlessly walked back from the toilet I borrowed. I actually stupidly fainted! Right in front of Matsuzawa's house. There has to be a limit to this kind of stupid coincidental occurrences.

As I advanced along the wall, my head continued to throb. Almost like was still being beat up in a fight, my vision was all blurry, swaying non-stop.

"Ah..."

Since my temples wouldn't stop hurting, I paused in the hallway for a little bit.

This was a quiet old building.

Because the hallway was constructed with wooden floors, each step caused creaky noises to sound. The entire of the house was very dimly lit, so earlier it wasn't entirely the fault of my eyes. The room that I had been resting in earlier was a type very rarely found nowadays, and the bathroom I just used was even more difficult. Very, very difficult. You could barely call this Western-style. The entire building was probably like this.

"Can you walk?"

When I heard a voice talking to me, I raised my head.

Matsuzawa was standing in the entrance to the room. For an instant, I thought she looked exceedingly like a beautiful snowy white woman. But when I looked carefully, she was actually just wearing a T-shirt top that could only be described as "casual". For a bottom, she was wearing knee-length shorts that looked like they were used as pajamas. Basically, it was dressed like she didn't care... she probably didn't even feel self-conscious standing like that in front of a guy!

"Oh, I'm fine!"

As I responded, I walked back towards the room. Because I couldn't stand how my head hurt, I had no desire to show off, so I climbed back into the futon that had been prepared.

"The doctor already left. Come! Drink some of this!"

"Oh, that's a little much..."

Matsuzawa had carried over to me a super high-capacity plastic bottle that was filled with barley tea. It was so large in volume, it made me wonder if it was used to store petroleum.

"It's all for you. You can drink all of it."

"I really appreciate your intentions, but I don't think I can take all of that. My stomach can't take it. Sorry..."

"The doctor said you were an idiot."

"Rather than saying I was an idiot, it would have been better if he said I had diarrhea."

I used the cup Matsuzawa gave to me and drank some barley tea. Because my body was so dehydrated, in a flash I kept asking for refills. In one breath, I drained three cups.

"The doctor said… in this kind of weather, if you do things like this or that, you'll end up like this or that. So, you're an idiot."

"If you want to seriously convey the message, you need to be more specific…"

Ah, damn! Maybe it was because I refilled myself with too much water, but now my stomach… I had a bad feeling my stomach would start rumbling again, so I twisted around a little in the blankets. This time, however, my bad luck descended, and "puwuuu~" a noise came!

"Is this a coincidence?"

"Ah!" I jumped up.

"D-did you hear that? It just happened to sound like a fart! It's just a coincidence! My calves just rubbed against each other earlier, that's all!"

"I wasn't asking about that. Tamura-kun ended up in front of my house… was that coincidence?"

Suddenly, I couldn't even break a joke. I stiffly swallowed my words.

What should I say?

"I…"

Earlier, what I had I decided to do—?

"This isn't a coincidence… I was looking for you."

"Why…?"

"In short, I felt it was absolutely necessary to run over here… yeah, I…"

All of a sudden, I felt like my hazy vision cleared up. Why did I come to see Matsuzawa? As I asked myself this, I quickly remembered everything.

The reason why I decided to run over here, and the reason why I was so anxious.

"I… probably… wanted to run to the side of you three years ago."

I noticed in that split second, Matsuzawa held her breath. Her slender shoulders began to tremble, and I couldn't bear to watch it. I figured she probably realized that I knew about that thing.

Was I cruel?

I probably wasn't considerate at all.

Despite this—

"I'm not saying I can do anything… but… when I accidentally found out about that incident earlier, I sprinted here with all my strength even though I knew there's no way I could return to "that time"… it looks like I've finally put that running training to use!" 

"Didn't you faint?"

After she said this soft words, Matsuzawa slowly lowered her head. When she pushed some hair that slipped out of place behind her ear, I couldn't take my eyes off of her appearance.

With a slight pause, she subsequently opened her mouth quietly.

"One year ago, I was waiting for someone to save me…"

The report said it was some light flesh injuries, but—when sixth grade Matsuzawa was at "that time", she had flown out of the open car window and landed on the grass under the shade of a tree. 

Then, right before her eyes, "everyone" in that car except for Matsuzawa Komaki shockingly tumbled down that slope, only to disappear into the unfathomable depths of the chasm floor.

When that one person was left on the side of the mountain road, it was already past ten o'clock at night. There was no way she had anything like a cellphone on her. She could only extend her five fingers, but not a single car passed. 

In the end, until six o'clock in the morning when a farmer's truck passed by, Matsuzawa Komaki had waited there. She continuously cried out the names of her family members, and continuously waited for an unlikely reply. She feared the sounds of wild animals, and was afraid of the dark. She trembled ceaselessly, and had no where to go.

Eight hours.

Then, even after those nightmarish eight hours passed, it wasn't like the ordeal was over. In other words—

It would have been better if it was just a nightmare.

The instant Matsuzawa said those words, the cup slid from my shaking hands. Fortunately, I had already finished all the barley tea inside. However, the simple act of picking it up couldn't process in my mind, so in the end Matsuzawa picked it up for me.

"My home is very quiet… there's only me and my grandmother who adopted me living here. However, recently my grandmother's been admitted to the hospital… so now it's only me."

Was it a subconscious action? Matsuzawa's fingers were tightly gripping a corner of the cup, and they seemed like they were turning white and discolored. I silently looked at her fingers.

"I told you this before... remember when I told you I didn't intend to apply for high school? That's because I don't want to increase the burden of money on my grandmother. Also... I have no desire to continue living an ordinary life. Like going to school and making friends, I've had enough of that. Once I'm finished with compulsory education, I want to live a quiet life and make just enough money to cover living expenses. I'll take care of my grandmother, and then live peacefully... that's what I want..."

What could I say in response to that?

Right now. What could I say on behalf of Matsuzawa?

Before I could even get a grasp of everything, Matsuzawa suddenly raised her head.

"Is Tamura-kun... someone who has dreams?"

I had no idea how to respond. But Matsuzawa seemed to assume so, and she nodded.

"Around this time last year, I dreamed about my mom, dad, and brother... a dream that they were all living on the moon. There was a house that was covered with a triangular roof, an arched floor, and shined with brilliant yellow rays. Everyone was living there."

A faint smile emerged unquestionably from her lips.

"Everyone was very energetic, and waved at me. I don't care if you want to laugh... but I'm convinced that's telepathy they've sent to me. I believe they wanted to tell me: "We're here! We'll be here waiting for you!" Since then, I've firmly believed that the final home I'll return to is on the moon. I'm convinced that one day, I'll forget all the memories I have here, happy or sad, and I'll return to that place."

Her fragile mouth still maintained that smiling shape, unmoving from that position.

"If it wasn't like that... then I..."

Matsuzawa suddenly stopped talking. True serenity descended on the sun-faded old-fashioned tatami mat.

I kept the silence, but I couldn't stop thinking—

If it wasn't like that... then I...

What would Matsuzawa become?


"Ah—it's you, Yukisada. Where did you go? Come eat! Hurry up and sit down! Dad, how many bottles of beer should I take out."

"Just start with one! And bring cups too while you're at it! Also, did you want to drink?"

"I'll be studying later, so I won't drink. Ah! Takayuki! Why are you sneakily snatching food with your hands?

"H-H-Hey! Agh! I spent the entire day today listening to a girl's nagging, I'm exhausted! And I'm hungry to death!"

"Huh? That girl... what's her name again? Yuri? You guys ate quite a bit, right? Oh and Yukisada, this kid's girlfriend ended up eating all your leftover ice! It was very frightening."

"Ah, Yuki nii-san, can you pass the mayonnaise from over there—?"

"Will Yukisada drink with me? Hah, will you share a drink with me tonight? Your dad is going to be lonely!"

"Oh yeah, oh yeah. Hey, have you seen my dictionary? I've looked for it for half a day and I haven't found it."

Yukisada. You. Hey, you. Yuki nii-san...

I used to take for granted hearing my name called out like this—

"Brother? What's up?"

I never imagined what it would be like for it all to disappear.

I had always taken it for granted.

I assumed it would always be right here.

"Sniff... sniff..." <!--The chinese has crying onomatopoeia, but I find it difficult to translate that well...-->

I sprawled out over the dining table—

"Huh, Yukisada? What's wrong?"

"What's... wrong with you? Did something happen?"

"Ugh, this is so troublesome. What's with you, Yukisada!?"

"As a man, there are times when you can't hold back your tears! Come. Let's drink together! Ha, tonight your dad will listen until you've had enough. Come on...!"

My tears, they won't stop coming.

What was Matsuzawa doing right now?

How lonely was it with her family passed away?

To be at home all alone, to be all alone in the world, and have to eat dinner just like this?

Could she laugh from joy?

Was she happy?

Waiting for the day she goes back to the moon?

Always waiting for the day she forget about everything that happened on earth?

Obviously when I thought about this, I couldn't help but feel the tears coming. I couldn't control myself.

In her world, was there nothing but sorrowful things—?

"Ah! Yukisada?"

Just like that, I lost control.

Slowly, slowly, I collapsed to the side.