Editing Cute Kunoichis:Volume1 Chapter1 (section)

===6: The Hotpot Party Begins===

How many times had he narrowly avoided death tonight?

But after Sugiyado Souha was left in worse shape than the exterior of the old apartment building, something was thunked down in front of him.

“Oh, a hotpot.”

“What kind of reaction is that!? See, Bara, this is what happens when you tell him in advance!!”

“I never said anything about a hotpot.”

Hoozuki had come out and told him all the ingredients, but he kept his silence like a ninja should. Some truths were better left hidden.

“Sensei, I couldn’t help but notice the sad state of your diet. This was a party-size recipe, but it can be made into a single-serving vegetable hotpot as well. You have a small pot for stewing udon in your closet, so fix this for yourself from now on. …Surely you aren’t going to claim you’re so pathetic you can’t even stew something in a pot. Right, Sensei?”

It looked like this recipe was boiled in water. She also added some chicken broth, but she apparently did not like using a powdered chemical seasoning for that.

Silver ponytail Nantou Hoozuki expressionlessly tilted her head.

“How did you manage when you were an active-duty ninja? You must have had to gather ingredients on-site and cook outdoors.”

“You’re on active duty now, so I know you know the answer. Official Shogunate spies receive such thorough logistical support that it never felt necessary. The deployment team would give me as many combat rations as I wanted.”

“Those might as well be big chunks of chemical seasoning. I’ve never been able to even finish the ones I’ve been issued.”

“And if worse comes to worst, you can always catch a snake or a rat. There are animals everywhere, from the city to the jungle. Cook it enough and most any meat is edible.”

“And what about infectious disease, Sensei!? Learning to cook like a normal person is a lot easier than showing off your superhuman skills there!!”

Meanwhile, the hotpot on the portable stove had apparently finished cooking. White steam blew from the small hole on the top, so Kuhou Ouka lifted off the thick lid while using a cloth in lieu of a potholder.

“I swear I will bring your diet up to normal human standards. Here you go, Sensei.”

“You didn’t have to do this, you know? But thanks.”

After receiving a serving in a bowl, he started with trying a sip of the clear broth. Next, he ate some of the well-cooked cabbage and chicken meatballs and enjoyed the texture between his teeth.

After swallowing, he gave his thoughts.

“It’s surprisingly normal.”

“Are you saying the home cooking a girl made especially for you is on the same level as a snake or rat crawling through the ditch!?”

“I’m saying it’s a normal amount of tasty.”

“Kh, what does that even mean based on your standards!?”

After all, he had revealed his tastes to include snakes, rats, combat rations, and Happy Churn. The sample set was too bizarre to draw any real conclusions.

“Let me see,” said curvy young Bara, cool beauty Hoozuki, and small Asagao while they used serving chopsticks or a ladle to move the hotpot’s contents into their own bowls. And after trying some…

“I see. That is very normal.” (Hanasawa Bara)

“Yes, I see what he means about it being a normal amount of tasty.” (Nantou Hoozuki)

“Normal. Very normal.” (Shizukuma Asagao)

“Stop calling it that! You’re making it sound like it should have been more surprising or something!” (Kuhou Ouka)

Skinny Ouka grew a bit tearful, but she should have been more observant. No matter what the others said, they were not slowing down in their consumption of the hotpot. They were even fighting over the serving chopsticks and ladle.

“Why are the chicken and the fish both made into a paste?”

“Ouka can’t help it. She’s a ninja teacher’s pet who wants to turn all rice into riceballs and all meat into meatballs.”

Hanasawa Bara squished her large chest between her upper arms as she held her chopsticks and bowl and her comment made still-growing Kuhou Ouka poke her index fingers together in front of her chest.

“B-but that’s what Sensei taught me to do. What’s wrong with doing what your teacher told you to do?”

“While it does take a lot of work, it helps cook the meat more evenly and helps you digest it more easily. For example, if you make meatballs out of the frogs or rats you catch, they really will taste like chicken, so-”

“D-do not talk about that right now!! You’re going to make me feel like I’m eating something else!!”

“?”

Time seemed to fly, which may have been all the proof anyone needed that Kuhou Ouka’s hotpot had been a success.

It was soon time for the finishing touch.

Youngest Asagao spoke up as part of the shopping team.

“Hoozuki and I got in a fight in the supermarket over whether to go with udon or rice soup, but we ended up settling on rice soup. If you use a package of white rice, it’s just as easy to make.”

“Wha-!?”

The shocked party was red ringlet curls Hanasawa Bara. She had apparently expected to finish things off with some kind of noodles, be it ramen, udon, or champon.

“Th-this can’t be happening. While the broth doesn’t pack as much of a punch as with sukiyaki, this water mixed with chicken broth is pretty powerful, so everyone knows you follow that off with noodles that are merely coated with the broth, not rice that soaks it all up! Hoozuki, you should have fought harder. No, you should have called me up so I could come running and join the fight!!”

“Oh, Sensei. I’ll be shutting the lid and letting this cook, so it will take a bit of time.”

Ouka ignored the harsh critic who was only interested in the eating side of the equation and she shut the clay pot’s lid with a smile.

“How long will it take?” asked small-faced Shizukuma Asago while she kicked her skinny feet below the low table.

“Cooking it won’t take long at all, but you need to shut off the heat and let it sit afterwards so the rice can soak up the broth, right?”

Cool beauty Nantou Hoozuki explained that while raising her arms and stretching her back in an alluring way. A much lazier time had just set in. With nothing to do, Sugiyado reached for the remote and turned on the fairly small flat-screen TV.

“Welcome to our documentary on modern ninjas. The Shogunate uses its isolationist policies to protect our nation’s advanced technology, such as ultra-miniature processors using molecular wiring, modular nuclear reactors which can be transported by train, and printers that can mass-produce the world’s most complex and detailed currency. But behind the scenes, there is conflict with other nations, most notably the Kingdom. Today, we will be shining a spotlight on that unseen backstage.”

Bara laughed.

“Imagine if the truth about our secret units really was broadcast to everyone’s living rooms like some kind of quiz show.”

“This is necessary.” Sugiyado toyed with the remote in his hand. “When they surround a construction site with tall walls, they will intentionally make one panel transparent. Because everyone can rest easy when they can see what’s going on inside. This is the same. A perfect secret force like you see in the movies would only worry the people, even if they aren’t doing anything wrong. The CIA is the best example there. They’re the world’s largest intelligence agency, but everyone knows their name. On the other hand, no one actually knows what they’re up to. …For people like you who protect the country in ways you can’t explain to the average person, it’s crucial that you can make everyone feel like they’re in the know even though you haven’t revealed anything at all.”

“Not just people like us.” Kuhou Ouka pouted her lips in a way that made her look childish. “For all of us. That includes you.”

“…”

He did not respond.

He hoped they could see his hesitation and conflict in the fact that he did not simply laugh it off and lie.

Now and in the past, he was one of the Hidden Ones who could not be ranked by the usual Low, Middle, High, and Elite system.

“Oh, shouldn’t it be done now?”

Shizukuma Asagao’s eyes widened on a small face which was further emphasized by her bob cut. Ouka sighed before deflating her puffed-out cheeks and going along with it. Sugiyado knew what a kind girl she was.

“Then I’ll drop the beaten egg in. Just a little longer.”

However…

“I know this is sudden, but I’m feeling kind of full.”

“That does happen when you wait a while after eating.”

“This is why I told you to go with lighter noodles instead of this heavy rice soup! Urp.”

“Can you all quit complaining when you didn’t lift a finger to help cook!?”

Young Ouka lightly clenched her teeth in frustration, but the eaters would generally eat whatever was placed in front of them, even if they were complaining all the while. Taking the food away from them would only inspire more complaints, so it was best to just ignore them.

“Here, Sensei. Eat up.”

Ouka made sure to at least serve Sugiyado. While she went all out in serving him, she also had the resolute eyes of a girl who was not going to overlook a thing.

But when she handed him the bowl full of rice soup, it felt surprisingly heavy. It was like she had handed him a whole apple.

“Oh.”

“What was that surprise directed at, Sensei? That might seem trivial, but it is actually very important.”

The twintail girl smiled, but since it was a forced smile, she must have been worried already. She may have noticed the excessive weight herself.

To escape the pressure from directly ahead, he used his chopsticks to take a bite.

“Huh? It isn’t that heavy at all. It’s perfectly edible.”

“Did you think I was making you something inedible!? I wasn’t so hopelessly flustered that I boiled up some plastic! Could you please give a thought to how your comments will affect a maiden heart, Sensei!?”

Her previous worries led her to talk awfully fast, but her face was bright. She must have been breathing a sigh of relief that he had actually accepted it. She kept switching between her “student” and “big sister” identities.

“Huff puff. Yeah, it really is edible.”

“I would still prefer udon next time, but this is good enough I suppose.”

People had a tendency to look down on people when it was their turn to be the critic, so it was best not to take the things they said too seriously.

Once they had finished off every last drop, rice soup time was over and the laziness had returned.

Sugiyado Souha really did bring his hands together in thanks.

“Thank you for the meal.”

“You’re welcome, Sensei. This is what they call human food.”

“Yeah, it’s not bad.”

“It scares me how little this seems to have affected you. To be clear, this isn’t meant to be a rare treat! You should be making sure to eat three proper meals a day!!”

“Which is why I’m so thankful.”

Red ringlet curls Hanasawa Bara’s large chest rose and fell in a sigh while she thought to herself and cooled her heated body with the breeze entering through the window.

She and cool beauty Nantou Hoozuki whispered to each other.

“(Hey, Hoozuki. Should we assume Sensei never learns his lesson because living like this gives his caretaker an excuse to visit him regularly?)”

“(I doubt he’s doing it on purpose, but I also doubt he cares if that is the result. In fact, this should be a lot more entertaining if we never point that out.)”