Editing NouCome: Volume 1 Chapter 1 (section)

===Part 2===
Our high school, Seikou Private School, is proud of its 15 first year classes. It is a gargantuan school and has a wastefully large ground area.

To put it simply, it's a fairly long distance from the front gate to the school doors. 

Sniffing the erotic book, Daiko-san's hug, and an encounter with the mysterious dog-like creature were all considerable burdens on my mental and physical stamina, and they left me feeling sick as I crossed the schoolyard.

After a few minutes I finally reached the entrance deep in the grounds. Fortunately, Class 1 of the second years is at this end of the 2nd floor. I just had to go up the stairs and I would be at my class.

"Morning."

I opened the door and exchanged greetings with the friends I could see.

On my way to my seat, I ran into a girl standing still by the window: Yukihira Furano.

She stood there very casually. However, she still gave off a strange sense of presence. Only around Yukihira did the air seem strained.

As if embodying the image of the name<ref>her name uses a Yuki kanji for snow and the hira kanji can mean flat/broad as in a broad expanse of snow</ref>, her white hair in the sunlight streaming from the window gave off a bright light, like the reflection off newly fallen snow. 

"Hey, morning, Yukihira."

In response to my voice, she turned around. Though there was an artificial feel to her features, they were very refined.

Without an expression Yukihira replied.

"Morning, maggot<ref>Ujimushi means maggot, but mushi also means 'steaming' as in 'mushi atsui' is humid weather.</ref> jerk."

"...Huh?"

Surprisingly abusive language was used.

Normally you'd think you had misheard, but with Yukihira, anything's possible.

It's not a conversation if you flinch and back away, though.

"Ah, the weather is nice today."

"Yes it is, maggot jerk."

"On a day like today, I'd like to skip school and go play somewhere."

"You are surprisingly naughty, maggot jerk."

"What day of the week is it today?"

"Monday. Does that please you, maggot jerk?"

"Don't you know I'm trying to change the subject?!"

In contrast to my raised voice, Yukihira's is serene.

"Oh, sorry if it made you feel bad. It's just a little bug joke."

"Bug... joke? What on earth is that?"

It's the first time I've ever heard that in my life.

"This morning, on the fortune-telling segment on TV, it said there might be an insect related disaster. Even if I'm not that serious in believing it, I do still worry a bit."

"Yes, and?"

"Then, I thought I'd make some jokes and we could laugh it off."

"That's too much of a reversal..."

"Hey, I don't settle for succumbing to fate because I'm a woman with a rebellious spirit. I'll fight it to the death if it's not something I can accept."

"No... Don't think it will be that big of an event."

"By the way, Amakusa, if you want I'll do more insect jokes."

"No, you've done enough."

"By the way, Amakusa, if you want I'll do more insect jokes."

It seems you want me to hear them. Even if I bluntly refuse, it will just prolong things.

"Then, tell me one."

"..."

"Yukihira?"

"..."

"Hello, Yukihira-san?"

"Hey, listen, Monsieur. Today, a stupid classmate was ignored<ref>This time Mushi was the verb to ignore.</ref> for you."

It was endlessly trivial.

"By the way, just now I didn't only use 'insect' and 'ignore', did you also see me play off the word Monsieur?<ref>Monsieur is Musshu, fairly close to Mushi.</ref>"

"...I don't get it." 

Explaining a gag that didn't work... Such a strong personality.

"Then George, who was deprived of a turn for this; where should he put his anger?!"

"Who is that?!"

This Yukihira Furano... Though she should be a cool person, she jokes around in a way that raises the tension. She 
just can't be a normal character.

"Roughly what are you thinking about, Amakusa? You have the face of someone about to go attack a little girl at any moment."

"What the hell kind of face is thaaaat?!"

"Or, the the face of villager at the entrance of the village endlessly repeating 『The Starting Village』."

"There is nothing in common with those two things..."

"Or, the the face of villager at the entrance of the village who is endlessly repeating 『Huh... Huh... You want to look at little girls?』."

"Don't force the two together!"

...It's useless. You can only get exhausted dealing with someone like her. I abandoned the conversation and started to go around her...


[CHOOSE ① "Hey, your breasts<ref>Oppai was used, which is kind of a kid's word meaning breasts or boobies.</ref>, let me touch your breasts" ② "Hey, my breasts, touch my breasts."]


...Yeah, this is strange. This is strange, right?

People usually would resist such a choice at any price if compelled. I also resisted... at the start. When Absolute Choice first appeared, I tried to avoid picking either choice... As a result, excruciating pain strikes your brain. I can't do it anymore. 

I'm not joking. At first the pain is only faint and dull, but over time it feels like my head is being slowly crushed by a steamroller. The skull begins to fracture and the fluid in my brain starts leaking; how else can I describe it? Even the woman with a scar on her face wouldn't be able to deal with it.

In other words, resistance is useless, impossible, and a waste of effort.

A man takes a breath. Dogs can't speak languages. And when an Absolute Choice appears, a choice is made. 

With that being said...

"Hey, my breasts, touch my breasts."

The moment I said those lines, Yukihira's eyebrows moved slightly.

"...Amakusa... You, just now, what?!"

It's no wonder you'd ask that. It's a remark that anyone can hardly believe they heard right.

"No, that is-"

"Perhaps, you just asked me to touch your tits<ref>She replied back using パイオツ or paiotsu, which is more porn like/crude, like 'tits' rather than 'boobs'.</ref>?"

"...Huh? Just now, what?"

I instinctively asked back, just now... Did she say tits?"

"I would like to hear whether you said 『Please touch my tits』 or not."

"No... I said something similar, except I didn't say tits."

"Tits weren't mentioned? It's funny; I'm sure I heard the word tits. Tits is a word that I'm absolutely sure I didn't hear wrongly... Ah, is it shameful to have said tits and now you are trying to conceal it? Even though I don't think tits is a vulgar word. Starting with tits is..."

"You just want me to say tits!"

"I admit it. But even you want to call out tits so badly sometimes."

"That's true."

"That's unnacceptable!"

"I'm getting scolded suddenly?!"

...At times like those Yukihira, the weirdo, was good to have around. If this choice had appeared in front of other women, it would be a big problem.

Actually, last year's class was disastrous. In front of the girls many things were done and said that can't be told... No, I won't remember it because I'll want to cry.

Anyway, this Absolute Choice seems pleased to make me have the worst experiences.

In terms of a galge, only the paths to bad endings were chosen last year. I wasn't even able to taste the L of Love.  

I don't want to be popular, I just want to talk to women (without frightening them or being despised by them)...

Today, however, there are a lot more Absolute Choices, and the choices are nastier. I went to my seat quickly; it's better to be quiet.

As I tried to pass quickly by Yukihira's side...


[CHOOSE ①"Hey, your tits, let me touch your tits." ②"Hey, my tits, touch my tits."]  


...I don't need this. I tried to go with the flow, but this is absolutely unnecessary.

However, no matter how much I complain in my heart, I have no veto power.

"Hey, my tits, touch my tits."

Yukihira, who took that expressionlessly, opened her mouth.

"I'm sorry. I don't want to talk to people who say such vulgar things."

"Which mouth is saying that?!"

"This mouth. This mouth always says tits."

"Is the word consistency not in your dictionary?!"

"In my dictionary, only the word tits appears."

"Then all your life you have been calling them tits!"

"Amakusa, you... Are you really taking a joke like that seriously?"

"Gaaaaah!"

I crumpled and tore at my hair. It's useless... I can't deal with her. I've been playing the fool with Yukihira... I shook it off, turned the other way, and headed to my seat.

Even though homeroom hadn't started, I was already absurdly fatigued. 

With a sigh, I sat down and casually glanced out the window.

"...Eh?"

In the middle of the second-story window, a face appeared.

"Waaah!"

I stood from my chair by reflex.

"Oh, Amacchi. Morning!"

The person on the other side of the glass gave a smile and flung open the window.

"Toe!"

The person dove feet-first through the window frame while giving off an action-hero-like cry.

While trailing elegant black hair that reached to her waist, she landed lightly.

"You... Where did you come from?"

The girl who received all the classes' attention, Yuuouji Ouka<ref>Her name changed from the inside cover 遊王子調歌 to 遊王寺調歌 but the furigana spelling seems the same.</ref>, stuck her thumb up and declared:

"Ha, because the guidance counselors were at the entrance I climbed up the wall!"

If you really thought about it... It's not a large climb, and you wouldn't have too bad of a fall, but even if it crossed your mind you usually wouldn't do it.

I stared at the girl intently. Long, glossy black hair. Full-bodied in the right places, but slender on the whole. The gentle features and appearance of a girl brought up by a fine family.

However, once she opens her mouth, she's noisy like a grade-schooler, her face flickers through expressions rapidly, and she repeatedly does unpredictable things.

Climbing the wall of a school would usually be called an impossible act, but in Yuuouji's case, it's completed with a single thought.

"Hi, Amacchi. Your face is looking tired; something wrong?"

Without hesitation, she brought her face too close.

"Uuu..."

We're already young men and women... I wish she was aware of that, but it's impossible for her.

"No, there were various things this morning... Rather, what's with the backpack?"

On Yuuouji's back was a swollen-to-the-limit-rucksack.

"Where the heck did that come from..."

"Listen closely. Nahaha, because I wanted to smuggle this, I wasn't able to come in through the front entrance."

I waited as Yuuouji happily lowered the rucksack to the floor.

She carried that up the wall... What kind of superhuman strength is that...?

"Look, look; these are our prototypes."

The contents were casually dumped on the floor. 

Most of the items are stamped with the 『UOG』 logo.

Though it's hard to believe, Yuuouji is the daughter of the president of UOG, a very big and well-known company.

Their business is food, clothing, cosmetics, consumer electronics, books, etc. They produce practically everything, and it's hard to find a house that doesn't have a UOG product in it. It's a company closely tied into people's lives.

"These were rejected in the planning stage of our product development section. For now they're being set aside, but we still want the opinions of kids for future reference."

Yuuouji's voice tempted our classmates to gather around her.

Even if they were products that were killed, they were on the leading edge in UOG fashion, and so being interested in them was natural.

"Ouka-chan, what is that?"

Everyone could take a product and submit his or her opinion. One girl pointed at a dangerously red-colored bottle.

"Oh, that... That's for wives who are faced with ennui. It's an aphrodisiac for women. It appears to activate women's sex hormones."

Who would ask high school students' opinions of thaaaaat?!

"The effect is outstanding and the price is cheap, but no questions were asked in the planning meeting,. It was just dropped."

"Hmm, why would that be?"

I casually grabbed a bottle and turned it around. The flashy, fancy brand name was visible: 『Abazuren Z<ref>Abazure means bitch.</ref>』.

"Yeah... The name is bad..."

"By the way, I secretly mixed some into my mom's rice this morning. She began to pant suddenly and said 
『Ouka... Do you want a little sister?』."

"What are you doing to the wife of the president of UOG?!"

Yuuouji's mother was a former idol 20 years ago. The other idols of the time were all childishly cute, but she gave off an intellectual air and ran as a star for a while. She retired to marry the darling of the business world, Yuuouji Ouma, and changed her media appearance. I see her often delivering the news as a commentator.

In a word, she was cool. That said, to experiment on her parents, Yuuouji is shameless... It's unbelievable that Yuuouji Ouka came from Yuuouji Kyouka. 

The cancellation that puzzles Yuuouji doesn't seem to be from the name 『Abazuren Z』 alone. If such a drug circulates in Japanese society, it'll collapse.

I took control of myself and looked at the other projects.

Giving off a strong presence in the corner was what looked like a small printer. In the center of the machine was a bunch of rectangular paper.

"Yuuouji, what's this?"

"Ah, its a toy for small children: 『Money Maker』. You play with it and make money."

Indeed, on the surface of the printed paper is a large animated cartoon character drawn in the center, 『Bill』. 

I picked up a few and flipped through them.

"Ah, its not very elaborate... Eh? The real thing is mixed in?"

One piece in there was clearly real, no matter how you looked at it. Yukichi-sensei<ref>Fukuzawa Yukichi is on the 10000 yen bill and is regarded as one of the founders of modern Japan.</ref>'s face was peering intently from it.

"Nahaha, this is an amazingly good machine. When I tried an experiment it came out just like the genuine item."

"That would be a scandal!" 

It's completely out!

"Geez, this looks a little less skethcy... It looks like 『Life Candy』."

Life Candy is a long-running product of UOG's confectionery brand, 『Yuuouji』. Each unit, called a 『Chapter』, has one package with three pieces, and several flavor variations and themes exist.

For example:

『Love Chapter: Unrequited Love, Confession, Falling in Love』

The first piece would have a sour taste to symbolize the sorrow, the second piece would have an extra-hot taste that expresses the throbbing heart, and the third would be sweet like a burning heart. The themes of the candy are all over the place, but good materials and a low price had made it another hot-selling product and have taken half the popularity of 『Animal Candy』 away.

"No, when this was also rejected I grieved."

Yuuouji picked some up and handed them out.

『Chapter of the Lady Killer: Unfortunately I Cheated on Two People, Unfortunately They Both Know, Unfortunately I Was Stabbed』

"You said the last part so cutely! I was forced to laugh!"

『Chapter of the Middle Level Manager: Pain from Dealing with Above and Below, Being Laid Off, Dying a Dog's Death on the Roadside at 50』

"It's too sad!"

『Chapter of the Postmortem: Taking a Bright Memory into the Next World, Futile Effort, A One-way Ticket to Hell』

"Who would buy that?!"

『Chapter of the NEET: Really?,  My Old Age, What Will Happen?』

"You'll make people cry!"

『Chapter of If You Win You Get Another:  Wondering if I'll win, I missed?, You are an idiot if you see this』

"What are you doing to the idiot?!"

None of those have any relation to flavors.

"How many of these canceled major products?......hm?"

I looked, trying to find something decent in the products on the floor. My eyes fell on Yukihira, who was squatting in the corner.

What are you doing with 『Money maker』 in your hand and staring......What? Her eyes are scary.

"Yukihira, what is it?"

"Ah, Amakusa it is you. This toy, it could be dangerous if misused. Shouldn't a person with good sense take responsibility for it?"

"Oh my......maybe so."

Or rather, it should be destroyed here, right now.

"Oh, me? No, it's impossible. Oh, I'm the only one? I guess it can't be helped, I guess I can since you ask."

"What is this act? Nobody asked you!"

"Tch......"

'Tch' was said. Just now she tch'ed me.

Yukihira stood expressionlessly, and Yuuouji's voice was raised.

"Ah, Furanocchi over here, hey! "

Yukihira returned the greeting casually.

"Morning, Maggot's daughter."

That joke, you're continuing it!

"Eh? Maggot? Ah, so, speaking of maggots."

Yuuouji groped and rustled through the bottom of the rucksack. Did she say 『Speaking of maggots』......that's the first time I've heard that.

"Yes, there's this too. Gee, what a coincidence, Furanocchi try to eat this."

Yukihira was presented with an earth colored package. It was printed with 『Animal Candy Maggot Flavor』 

What kind of miracle is that!

"Indeed, misfortune concerning maggots, it seems to be this......the developer should die."

If Yukihira eats it calmly, she will vomit it back up. Oh, I understand the feeling. What roughly do maggots taste like. Things of that type should already be canceled.

Yukihira undid the wrapping paper, then threw it in her mouth. For a while she rolled it on her tongue then declared with a serious look.

"Seriously, it gives the impression of a maggot."

"What kind of an impression!"

"The secret ingredient is one drop of Cicada pee, I think it increases the potency of the flavour."

"You say something like that about sesame oil!"

While watching, I glanced at Yuuouji.

"I mean is it......even safe to eat?"

"It's okay, it's okay. The sweets have a 『Strawberry taste』 and a 『Melon taste』 without the strawberry or melon? Hey, Amacchi here is one too."

"S-so......?"

......I wonder what this is. It is not unpalatable, its not bad at all. It is a taste that can't be expressed.

"This, what in the world is in this?"

Yuuouji looked at the label.

"Just a moment. Umm, the raw material......its maggot extract."

"Waaaaaa?"

By reflex I ended up spitting the candy out. Yuuouji saw it and immediately went into a guts pose again.

"Amacchi, it's still good if you pick it up within 3 seconds!"

"That isn't the problem!"

"No Amacchi, I was just joking a moment ago, a joke! It doesn't contain any maggot juice."

Yukihira heard Yuuouji's words and clapped her hands.

"Oh, that is a wonderful maggot joke."

"That's enough!"

Arg......It's hard to tell the truth from Yuuouji's expression. I have to confirm it with my own eyes.

"Show it to me."

I half snatched it so that I could see the label side.

『The ingredients cannot be listed.』 

Scary!

"Yu-yukihira, you aren't worried about this??"

Yukihira put it in her mouth before me.

"Oh, Amakusa, you aren't being very manly with this maggots issue."

"You sound like an old man!"

"Generally it is rude to spit out food people give you. I don't think it is quite the lowest act?"

"That's not very persuasive when you are holding a tissue to your mouth Yukihira-san."

"It's morning sickness."

"That's not even a decent lie!"

"Ahaha, both of you, its okay, there are some cheeses in the world with maggots."

"You just said there were no maggots!"

My voice was going hoarse from shouting. How many times have I raised my voice this morning?

"......To be expected when those three are together."

I heard those annoying words spoken by someone. Speaking of Yukihira and Yuuouji bundled together with me, it could only be that.

"Shit, it's not right....... I'm not like that."

"Nahaha, Amacchisa, resign yourself and accept you are part of the 『Reject 5』.

My shoulder is familiarly slapped by Yuuouji while the hated phrase was uttered.

Twice each year here at Seikou, a vote is taken in the first and second half of the year. Put simply, its a beauty contest vote by all the boys, up to 3rd year, 45 classes in total, which ranks the best 5 men and women.

Because there are so many entries the newspaper and broadcast department take it up and close to 100 percent of the school participates.

In it's brilliant shade an ominous ranking exists. Even though their appearance is excellent, their behavior and personalities make people judge it impossible to fall in love with them. 5 men and 5 women are chosen.

The dishonorable name given to them is the 『Reject 5』.

Yukihira shows no sign that she minds. Yuuouji doesn't seem to care about things like that.

However, I'm just a normal person and can't do that.

[[image:NoucomeVol1 045.jpg|thumb]] 

"I'm different, I'm different......I'm just an ordinary high school student."

However, no matter how much I lamented it, the title once given would not disappear for at least half a year.

By the way, the current rankings were totaled in March at the end of the last school year<ref>The japanese school year ends in March and the next year begins in April</ref>. Because the then third year students were included, as of May in the new year there are nine 『Reject 5』 remaining.  

Three people is one third of the list, and are concentrated in Second year class 1. The additional fact that not one of the students from the popular ranking is in the class it makes for a sad story for the class.

I don't want to think I have a third of the responsibility for that.

"Amacchimosa<ref>I think this is her made up suffix using 'mosa' as in Stalwart, Man of Valor</ref>, you are cool when you are silent."

"No, you shouldn't be the one saying that......"

So, if I'm honest, I think that objectively I look good. In middle school, confessions and love letters were not unusual. It's not too much to say I was popular.

However, March of last year just before I was entering high-school my life changed completely. The damn absolute choices happened to me, and I was forced into eccentric behaviour......and as of May in the second year of high-school the low quality label 『Reject 5』 was pasted onto me.

However, my abnormality in the end is caused by the irregular Absolute Choices.

The loose screws in the heads of Yukihira and Yuuouji are different. Amakusa Kanade, as a human, is a fairly normal character. So, even absolute choice doesn't 


[CHOOSE: ① Strip to the waist and yell like a Japanese man ② Strip your lower half and yell like an Amazon warrior.]


Are you screwing with me heaven!?

Why come out with this now! Read the mood! But, what prejudice is it that makes Amazon = naked lower half!

......Yes, I am ignored like usual. I'll do it, I'll do it. I thought you'd say that, I'll do it well.

I choose number ① and put my hands on my uniform, and I started to take it off despite my reluctance. 

"Oh my god, look at that."

What was sad that though the girls screamed 『Amakusa is doing something weird again』, it didn't seem to come with a reaction like blushing, since it had become such an everyday occurrance in the classroom.

Only a month had passed in the new class and its already been recognized that I'm the guy you don't help out even if I begin stripping......

I shook off the pain of that somehow and quietly(?) stripped to the waist. How about it choices, are you satisfied by this?"

"Gu......"

However, a headache hit signifying NO. Apparently it's not sufficient without shouting like a Japanese man.

"Gahaha, this is a hero's spirit!"

Already growing desperate I shouted that for the time being.

The pain faded away...... hey is it good like that?

"It's done."

At that time, the door opens, and the teacher enters.

She immediately sees me standing there doing a perfect guts pose shirtless.

"You......what are you doing?"

The teacher of Second year Class 1, Douraku Utage. With a body that can only make you think she is a grade school kid. But contrary to that is her speech and behavior which is crude and violent.

In the fairly loose atmosphere of Seikou, the yankee aura she gave out was noticeably different.

"No teacher, there's a good explanation for this......"

"Hmm, tell me what it is."

"Ah......I was ordered to do it."

"By who?"

"......by the voices in my head."

Not this, not this, despite everything.

"Come with me for a moment."

Utage-sensei's small palm, beckoned me. 

"Sit."

"No, I want to put on my clothes first."

"Shut up."

"......yes."

As soon as my knees bent, I was grabbed by the base of the neck.

"Let's go to the special guidance room."

"Ow, it hurts!" 

Utage-sensei commanded the class president to take roll call in her place and I was dragged towards the door. 

Where does she store such power in that body!

There was nothing I could do as I was, naked to the waist, dragged down the hallway.