Editing How To Eat Life:Chapter 3-5

===#3-5_otogiri_tobi / Someday, At The End Of The World===

“Otogiri…”

The teacher with black-rimmed glasses in front of the school gate called out. Tobi stopped.

“Good morning, Yagarashima-sensei.”

“...O-oh hey. What, Otogiri?”

“I have to use this backpack—”

Tobi gestured to Baku on his back.

“It has to be this one. I’m sorry about making sensei unhappy all the time.”

“I’m not particularly unhappy about it…”

“Is that so. Well, thanks for the hard work every morning.”

“Y-yeah. I mean, it’s my job so…”

Tobi bowed his head slightly to the staff before entering the school gates.

“Hmm…”Baku hummed.

“Is this what they call a change of heart?”

“...I just felt like it.”

Around the shoe box, Shiratama was waiting. Tobi changed his shoes and walked to the classroom with Shiratama. Shiratama seemed like she wanted to say something, but couldn't find the words. It was the same for Tobi. He caught sight of Asamiya’s figure in the classroom, and felt relieved. Shiratama probably felt the same.

In the morning homeroom period, their homeroom teacher Harimoto talked about Kon. Kon was absent today as well, and it would take a little while longer before she recovered. That was all. He didn't talk about Takatomo.

Murahama and Shimomaeda, who’d been close to Kon, joined a group of other girls and boys. Masamune, a.k.a. Masaki Shuuji, was messing around energetically, making the students in that group laugh. Asamiya had an unpleasant look on his face.

He demolished his lunch in seconds, leaving just the Koppe-pan. Tobi shouldered Baku and left the classroom with the bread in hand.

Entry into the courtyard was still off limits. As he tried to go outside through the front entrance, it started raining. It couldn't be helped. Tobi squatted in front of the shoe box and ate his bread.

“The world turns, huh?” Baku grumbled.

Tobi finished his Koppe-pan in a flash.

“What was that?”

“Just a feeling, you know. Don't you get it? At least get this much.”

What Baku was trying to say was probably this:

Such things had happened to Takatomo and Kon, yet other people were already quickly getting back to their ordinary lives. If Tobi were to disappear today, it would have no effect on the revolution of the Earth. It would keep on turning without fail. The world turned. One by one, everyone continued living their lives as usual.

Beyond the transparent glass door of the entrance, thin drops of rain fell. He couldn't hear the sound of the rain.

As meal time ended and lunch break began, someone approached the shoe box. That someone squatted beside Tobi.

The two of them gazed at the rain.

“Did you look it up?”

Tobi asked the girl beside him without looking at her.

“On your phone… like on the internet?”

“About the zingai?”

The girl asked in return. When Tobi nodded, she replied, “A little.”

“Did you find out anything?”

“Ghosts or spirits, yokai, fairies— apparently their true form is actually zingai. And also, the strange phenomena spoken of in urban legends—those have to do with zingai as well.”

“So a bit of everything.”

Tobi laughed dryly. The girl laughed too. Tobi looked beside him. Shiratama looked at Tobi as well.

“So me and Chinu are on the same level as monsters?”

Baku let out a “Tch” as if he were clicking his tongue. Shiratama stroked him, as if to say, “Now, now.”

“There are some people who want to connect everything and anything to zingai. At the end of the day, only the people that can see zingai can see them, after all.”

“Like Tobi and O-Ryuu? At least that part seems correct.”

“Those who can't see are the majority, so there’s a lot of people who aren't taking it seriously too. Like the occult—”

“Baku is part of the occult?”

As Tobi muttered, Baku went wild. Even though he had no legs, it was like he was trying to kick him. That, or he was trying to hit him. Once again, Shiratama stroked Baku, pacifying him.

“I haven't tried SNS before. Maybe I’ll try signing up next time.”

“Well, I don't have a smartphone.”

“It’s convenient to have one.”

“Is that the sort of thing it is?”

“Well, you can stay in contact no matter where you go.”

Even in the facility, it was not rare for residents to have smartphones. Those who messaged or called friends all night long would get a warning issued from the staff.

“If anything happens—”

Shiratama looked outside.

“We can talk. Anytime…”

“Mm…”

Tobi nodded halfheartedly.

“Keh!”

Baku seemed like he wanted to say something. If he had something to say he could just say it.

“Ah, that’s right.”

Shiratama pulled her phone out of her skirt pocket. She tapped the screen and launched an app. Tobi looked at the screen.

“You can look at maps like these, too. You can zoom in and out. And you can change the direction in any way you like.”

“Ahh, that’s amazing.”

“You’d never get lost again.”

“Um, Shiratama, are you trying to sell it to me…?”

“I wouldn't dream of it!”

The strangely old fashioned words suddenly came out of Shiratama, and Tobi felt like bursting out laughing. Shiratama looked stupefied.

“So the map,” Tobi murmured.

“And you can contact people.”

Shiratama fiddled with her phone and repeated her words from earlier.

“...Do you find me persistent?”

Tobi shook his head.

“Not at all.”

The rain was growing stronger. It looked like it was about to thunder.

“There was something on my mind—”

Shiratama spoke, then hesitated. When Tobi prompted, “What?”, Shiratama turned off her phone screen and took a breath.

“It’s about the voice.”

There was one part that came to mind. Tobi felt a little caught on it as well.

“You mean, the one that said “Aren't you weird?”, that voice?”

Takatomo and Kon had heard something akin to auditory hallucinations. As their mental health crumbled, it was possible for such things to arise. But it hadn't just been Takatomo. It wasn't just Kon either. Both of them had heard a similar voice. Shiratama looked down and bit her bottom lip lightly.

“I just don't think it was a trick of the ears or a hallucination…”

Baku let out a “Haah…” as if sighing.

Takatomo hadn't regained consciousness. And what about Kon? Her future was unclear. But it was settled, for now. Wasn't that it?

The world continued turning.

If it hadn't been a hallucination, then whose voice had it been?

In the afternoon classroom, you could hear the sound of rain even without straining your ears. From time to time, lightning flashed in the distant sky. A second later, thunder rumbled, and Masamuune would say something, making people laugh. Then, the teacher would warn them to be quiet.

Tobi checked in on the nearby Asamiya frequently. Asamiya had textbooks and notes open on his desk. But mostly, he just looked downwards. It was like he carried an invisible boulder on his back, and was trying his best to bear its weight. That was what it looked like.

Whenever Masamune spoke, Asamiya would lift his face slightly. He would turn and glance at Masamune. After that, Asamiya would shake his head, or heave a deep breath. Tobi couldn't hear what, but sometimes he would mutter something under his breath.

Right after fifth period ended, there was a particularly loud clap of thunder, and Masamune fell from his chair with an “Uhyaa!” year 2 class 3 roared with laughter, and even the departing teacher laughed.

“It’s not me!”

It was sudden. Asamiya stood up and glared at Masamune.

The laughter stopped all at once. Masamune sat on his ass, his mouth dropping open.

“You’re the one who’s weird!”

Who was the ‘you’ Asamiya was talking to? Of course, it was Masamune, wasn't it?

With the say no evil monkey that resembled a tarsier with tree bark-like skin on his head, Masamune was indeed weird. But that was because Tobi could see that zingai. Disregarding the zingai, Masamune was just a simple class clown.

“I’m not weird!”

Asamiya’s shout sounded like a howl.

“I’m not weird! I’m not weird! I’m not weird! Stop it…! I’m not weird, I’m not weird at all! It’s not me, you’re the ones that are weird! It’s not me! I’m not weird! I’m not weird! I’m not! I’m not weird, I’m not weird, I’m not weird! I am not weird…!”

“....Uh, objectively speaking, I think you really are being weird right now though?”

Masamune smiled tightly, and taking that as a joke, some of their classmates laughed reservedly. Asamiya started hitting both sides of his head with his hands.

“Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up! Who are you! I’m not weird! You’re the ones that’re weird, you’re weird, not me!”

“A-asamiya-kun…!”

Shiratama ran up to Asamiya.

“Tobi—”

At almost the exact same moment, Baku called out to him. Tobi noticed it. When had it happened? He wasn't sure, but he noticed in that moment. It was the say no evil monkey.

Right now, that unsettling zingai sat plopped on Masamune’s head. But it was no longer the say no evil monkey.

Its pose with the covered mouth resembled the ‘say no evil’ from Nikko Tosho-gu’s three wise monkeys, so that’s what Tobi had called it. But that was no longer the case. It wasn't covering its mouth. To be exact, normally there would have been a mouth there. But it was missing that part. There was nothing there. It had eyes like a tarsier’s. Ears and a nose too. But no mouth. Was it missing one from the very beginning? Or had it disappeared? Whichever it was, that zingai had kept its nonexistent mouth covered. Why had it stopped making that pose?

Asamiya pushed Shiratama aside.

“—...”

Shiratama crashed into a nearby desk and staggered. Asamiya’s upper body lurched forward with great momentum, then immediately bent backwards. He repeated the movement.

“UUUUUuuuAAAAAAAaaaAAAaaAAAAaaAAaaa…!”

The students were distressed. Some ran away, frightened. It was a panic. Of course, Tobi was shocked as well. Asamiya. What had happened to him? He was screaming that he hadn't gone weird. As if he were being told “You are weird”, and was arguing against it.

Who had told Asamiya such a thing?

At the very least, Tobi could not hear it. Could Asamiya hear it? Only Asamiya.

Tobi saw him. It was Masamune. Masaki Shuuji covered his mouth with both hands.

In place of his zingai, Masamune assumed the pose of the ‘say no evil’ monkey.

“....That bastard!” Baku spat.

Masamune’s eyes were narrowed, his shoulders shaking. What was so delightful about this? He was laughing. Masamune seemed ready to burst out laughing, desperately trying to keep it together.

Tobi grabbed Baku from where he hung on his desk. If Tobi left him behind, Baku would surely never forgive him. Tobi darted in between the desks, chairs, and other classmates. Masamune noticed him and widened his eyes. Tobi leapt at Masamune. He heard the voice.

(Isn't it weird?) (It’s your fault) (You’re to blame) (It’s you) (You are)

“—Nngah…”

Tobi clutched his head and crouched down. It wasn't just Tobi. Shiratama screamed, “Gyah…!” A voice. It was the voice. Voice? Was this a voice?

(It’s you) (Isn't it weird?) (You are) (You’re the one to blame)

Countless voices, like a jumbled up mixture of solids and liquids—like metal that was heated until it melted into sludge—gushed directly into his head.

(Isn't it weird?) (You are) (You’re weird) (You are) (You are)

“...Tobi! Tobi?!”

Baku shouted for him. 

On Masamune’s head, the mouthless tarsier with the bark-like skin—that zingai—even though it had no mouth, the spot where its mouth should have been squirmed and wriggled.

(Weird) (Isn't it weird?) (It’s weird) (You’ve gone weird)

Was it weird? Weird. Wasn't it weird? He felt like he was going weird.

Was it that guy?

That’s right. Masamune’s zingai. That was it. The voice was that zingai.

“Tobi, use me to…!”

Me to? What? Use Baku to- I see. Tobi hurled Baku, aiming at Masamune.

“—Uahh…?!”

Masamune dodged it by a hair's breadth. He avoided it. Masamune cast a contemptuous look at Baku, who’d crashed into the lockers at the back of the classroom, and ran. Was he planning on getting out of the classroom? Tobi picked up Baku and chased after him. As he opened the door Masamune had slammed with all his might and stepped into the hallway, Shiratama’s call stopped him.

“Tobi-kun, wait! I’m coming too…!”

“Shiratama, go report this to Haizaki!”

Tobi said without turning around, and ran down the hallway. What would come of reporting it to Haizaki? He didn't know. He’d just said it in the spur of the moment. It was better if Shiratama didn't come along. It was dangerous.

Baku yelled, enraged.

“Where did he run off to, that bastard!”

“As if I would know!”

Masamune was not that tall, but he was pretty quick on his feet. Even as he closed some of the distance between them on the stairs, it didn't seem like it would be that easy to catch up to him. Masamune was heading towards the shoe rack. Wasn't he going to change his shoes? He charged towards the glass door of the front entrance. He did so with a force like he was planning on ramming his body through it. Masamune pushed open the glass door and ran outside. Tobi, too, chased after him in his indoor shoes.

The rain was strong. Tobi was soaked in an instant. As Masamune ran, he ranted and raved about something. The sound got lost in the rain, so he couldn't hear it well, but it sounded something like, “You’re wrong”, “It wasn't me”, “It wasn't my fault”. That seemed to be what he was saying.

“—For real, this guy is awful! He’s the worst…!”

Baku hurled abuse. It poured as if someone had flipped a bucket over.

Masamune crossed the crosswalk at a red light, and cars honked their horns at him. Masamune started and stopped for a moment, then immediately continued across the road. Tobi had no choice but to slow his pace a bit. Several cars were coming and going on the road. Picking out the gaps between cars coming from both left and right, Tobi got to the other side of the crosswalk as well. He’d gotten away from him again.

He should just leave him be. It was pouring after all. And he was out of breath. To be honest, this was tough. Did he really have to go to these lengths to chase after Masamune?

Zingai. It was because zingai were involved. Tobi had Baku. He could see zingai.

Baku had eaten Kon’s zingai. Because of that, Kon had fallen into heart desolation, or whatever it was called. That was the mess Baku had made, so Tobi was responsible as well. But at the bottom of it all, weren't they just getting what they deserved?

Kon had a complicated, problematic relationship with her mother. Even if that were the cause, if Kon’s zingai hadn't done bad things, this wouldn't have become such a big deal. Takatomo wouldn't have jumped off the roof either.

And then, there was that voice. That was the work of zingai as well. Masaki Shuuji. Masamune’s zingai had gone after Kon and Takatomo and tormented them with that voice. If it hadn't done that, the series of tragedies probably wouldn't have occurred.

If he let them be, Masamune’s zingai would do it again. In fact, it already was. It had made Asamiya hear that voice.

It’s better to just eat it.

Eat that zingai.

Masamune headed towards Asakawa. Was he going to cross the bridge? No. the river bank. Masamune ran down the bank of Asakawa river. What was colloquially known as Asakawa den. On the flood plain of Asakawa river was a tent village. Around where the tent village came to an end, Masamune went down to the river bank. The weeds were overgrown here; just ahead, various trees, taller than a person, grew densely.

Without stopping, Masamune turned his head.

Right now, Masamune didn't have Masaki Shuuji’s face. Two oversized eyes. Round ears that looked like they had sharp hearing. His nose was protruded, and he had no mouth. It was a tarsier. Was Masamune wearing a mask of a tarsier with tree bark-like skin? There was no way that was it. And crucially, the zingai sat atop his head was gone.

“Did he fuse with the zingai…?!”

It was probably as Baku said. Only Masamune’s head had become identical to the zingai’s. From the neck down, he was still Masamune.

“Masaki…!”

Even though it was useless, Tobi tried shouting Masamune’s name. Masamune was trying to push his way into the thicket. He was probably going to keep going like that. Something unexpected happened. Masamune turned back around.

(What’s with you?) (What is it with you?) (What are you?) (What?) (What are you?)

“—Aah…”

Without thinking, Tobi covered his ears. That action meant nothing. Masamune did not have a mouth. The spot where his mouth should have been squirmed and wriggled. It was like there were hundreds, thousands of maggots gushing forth. But it was decidedly not a mouth. This voice was not a sound.

(What are you?) (Who are you?) (You’re) (Who are you?) (What?)

His brain. Tobi’s brain was shaking. The voice vibrated minutely, shaking his brain.

(You don't even know) (You don't even know anything) (I’m not at fault) (It wasn't my fault)

(Isn't it weird?) (It’s weird) (You are) (Yours) (It’s you)

(Not me) (You) (Weird) (It’s weird) (You’re the one who’s weird)

“—...Tobi! Tobi! Oi, Tobi?! Tobiii…!”

Baku kept yelling Tobi’s name. He cowered in the thick, wet grass.

Masamune turned and vanished into the undergrowth. Tobi’s brain was still shaking. Was that even possible? At any rate, it felt very unpleasant. But he had to eat him.

Tobi stood up. He pushed his way through the drenched leaves and branches of the jungle-like thicket, searching for Masamune. He seemed to be facing the riverbank. That, he understood, somehow. Where was he? He couldn't see him, but he was there. Just ahead.

Brushing past the whip-like branches, there was a river beach up ahead. Though he called it a beach, it wasn't made of sand or pebbles. It was mud. Looking downstream, he saw a railroad bridge. Right beside that was a pedestrian bridge. Asakawa river was murky, and flowing as quickly as usual.

Masamune was submerged up to his knees in the Asakawa river. His back was facing towards Tobi.

Tobi stepped into the muddy ground. It was terribly slushy. He was going to eat him.

Eat?

'''Eat him.'''

''But why?''

“...I’m hungry,” Baku moaned.

“I’m just…so hungry, I can't bear it. It’s the same for you, isn't it, Tobi…?”

His cells, all the cells in his body were completely hollow. They were empty. He had to fill them somehow. If he didn't, he couldn't keep on living. If he didn't eat, he would die. It was for the sake of survival. To keep on living, he would eat. That thing, that zingai, he had to eat it.

Baku was starving. The one who was starving was Baku, but Tobi could feel that hunger so starkly he could almost hold it in his hands. Tobi was not starving. He had absolutely no desire to eat that thing. Could he really say that with certainty? No one could go on living without eating, could they?

What was so bad about eating to survive?

So he had eaten Kon Chiami’s zingai. Was he going to eat again?

If he ate that zingai, what would happen?

Will he still eat that zingai, which has fused itself to a human’s head?

What would become of Masaki Shuuji?

“What are you doing over there, Masaki?”

Tobi stopped at the edge of the water.

He couldn't let him eat him.

He could not allow Baku to eat that zingai.

“You should come back. It’s raining, so it’s dangerous.”

(—abandoned)

The voice. It reverberated not in his eardrums, but in his brain. That voice,

(You abandoned him. That day… your brother…)

(He wasn't like you, was he? Slender, and smart, and athletic. Good at games, and drawing, and everything else. Nii-chan was a kind person, huh? And you?)

(You..always doing things that got you scolded by your parents, and nii-chan always covering your back. A hopeless, lousy little brother. Well, you were still his brother after all.)

(Always sticking to him and crying, nii-chan, nii-chan, nii-chan; he must have found you annoying, huh? Sometimes nii-chan would be cold to you, and you’d whine and cry and make a fuss, and your parents would get mad and say, that’s enough—)

What?

What was this—whose story was this?

(You went camping a lot with your family. That day was the last time you went camping, huh? A river. There was a river. A river, near the campsite. It was nii-chan who suggested it, huh? Shuu, let’s go swimming. Shuu! Shuu, for Shuuji. You’re the second son, so Shuuji¹, huh? But you were scared, so nii-chan went off swimming on his own. You sat on the riverbank, stacking rocks—)

Nii-chan? Brother?

(Having swam away from the shore, nii-chan suddenly yelled, ‘Shuu, help me!’—)

Whose brother? Masaki Shuuji’s?

(And you… you didn't go to help him, did you?)

(I mean, it’s scary! You couldn't swim that well anyway! There was no way you could’ve saved him!)

(That’s right! That’s right, that’s why you… you looked on silently, did you?)

(Nii-chan…he was drowning… bobbing in and out of the water… it was a river after all; it had a current, and it swept him along… as the river water went down his throat, he screamed again and again, “Shuu, help me!” and—)

(—you just watched, didn't you? You just listened, while your brother’s voice begged you to save him.)

(If I don't help him now, nii-chan will die!)

(You thought that, didn't you? Even though you understood that… you didn't do anything, did you?)

(Nii-chan was thoroughly swept away, you couldn't see him anymore—)

(And what did you do after that? That’s right! Right after that, you went to your parents)

(Crying, telling your parents, “he disappeared”, “Nii-chan, he disappeared…”)

(Am I wrong? Huh? That can't be it, right? That wasn't it, was it? That couldn't have been it, could it?)

(Nii-chan screamed again and again, “Shuu, help me!”... He begged for your help—)

(Despite that, you ignored him, didn't you? And on top of that, you lied)

(Nii-chan… you abandoned him)

(That’s right. You, you abandoned your brother) (You watched him die before your eyes) (You let him die)

“...‘You’—”

Tobi wiped his face with his hand. The rain was still coming down strong. Somewhere off, thunder rumbled.

(It was me)

The voice spoke.

(I) (Me) (I did) (I) (I did) (It was me) (I) (I) (I) (I—)

(I abandoned my brother, and watched him die. To be able to do such a thing, I—)

(Aren't I weird?)

(No) (...Wrong) (It wasn't m-) (No) (It wasn't me) (I’m not at fault) (I’m)

(It wasn't my fault!) (Who is it?) (Saying it’s my fault, that I was at fault, who’s blaming me?)

(Someone is blaming me) (I can hear it) (That voice, blaming me) (—it’s just my imagination)

(But my parents think so) (I know) (Why wasn't it you?)

(If only you died instead of your brother) (—that must be what they’re thinking)

(I’m not smart like nii-chan. And I’m bad at drawing, and can't seem to grow taller…)

(I don't do as I'm told) (I'm a liar) (I abandoned my brother) (I let him die) (I killed him)

(Even though nii-chan said, “Shuu, help me”) (—I didn't do anything in the end)

(If I just get our parents right away) (They wouldn't have made it in time anyway!) (Isn't this guy terrible?)

(Nii-chan was drowning) (It looked painful…) (I pretended not to see) (This guy is just unbelievable)

“That’s enough…!”

He didn't want to hear any more. He didn't want to know this.

“It wasn't on purpose, was it! Masaki, it wasn't your f—”

(Not me) (It wasn't my fault) (I’m not to blame) (I’m not crazy) (I’m)

(I remember it well) (At nii-chan’s memorial service, I cried, and cried, and cried—)

(Everyone laughed, saying my face looked terrible!) (Even my parents laughed!)

(Nii-chan said that a lot too!) (“Shuu is so funny”) (I made him laugh all the time)

(Am I funny?) (Hey, nii-chan?) (Am I funny?) (You’re funny) (I’m funny)

(Laugh) (Please laugh) (I’m funny, aren't I?) (Laugh) (Because I’m funny)

(Aren't I funny?) (Let me make you laugh) (I’ll make you laugh) (So, laugh!)

Masamune. Masamune was changing. No, he’d already changed. Masamune’s head was already that of a mouthless tarsier with tree bark-like skin. In other words, it had been turned into zingai. But until just now, it had just been his neck and above. Now it wasn't just his head.

(This is me) (Someone wrote that on SNS) '''(“Look for your true self!”) (“Search for yourself!”) (“Try to find your own self!”)''' (I’ve found myself!)

(The me who is funny) (The one that makes everyone laugh) (The me who abandoned my brother) (Isn't it weird?) (I’m) (I did) (I) (I’m) (I) (I) (I) (I) (I) (I—)

The tree bark-like skin spread, down Masamune’s shoulders, even his chest. The entirety of that skin pulsed and squirmed.

(Takatomo) (I thought you understood me) (She—) (That girl)

(I talked to her about it) (About my brother) (She comforted me) (She liked me, didn't she?) (Even so—!) (“I’m not going to go out with you, Masamune”) (She turned me down with a laugh!)

(Takatomo) (Even so, I was worried about her, wasn't I?) (Because she became strange) (But—)

(She) (“Hah? What?”) (What is with her!) (—Isn't it weird?)

(It’s weird) (It’s her fault isn't it?) (If she’d gone out with me)

(She’s the one to blame) (Takatomo) (Eat shit) (Man, that feels good) (She got what she deserved!)

Masamune was undergoing transfiguration quickly. If this continued, the transformation would cover Masamune’s whole body. Masamune would become a zingai.

(But I couldn't have imagined she’d jump, could I?) (That Kon) (That’s right) (It’s her fault, isn't it?)

(Asamiya) (What’re you so pissed about) (Laugh) (Laugh!) (I’ll make you laugh)

(Even though I’d gone to all the trouble of reading the room and making everyone laugh) (Laugh) (—Laugh already!)

It was no longer just a voice that shook his brain. That voice reverberated in Tobi’s brain all the same, but at the same time, another voice rang out.

(I’m) “I’m” (I’m trying to make you laugh!) “Laugh!” (You happy-go-lucky idiots!)

At this point, Masamune’s body had zingai-fied, from his head to his feet and hands. That strangely plump belly was pimply and bubbly, quivering and squirming, finally ripping apart. From there, it spread.

“Laugh!” (Laugh!) “Idiots” (Laugh!) “Laugh!” (“Laugh for the rest of your lives!”)

Was that a mouth? It was lined with tiny teeth. It was unmistakably a mouth.

“(“Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!”)”

The mouth, the mouth that opened on Masamune’s stomach like a gaping wound, laughed. It laughed hard.

“...Stop it!”

Tobi wanted to sit down. Baku was saying something. Keep it together, Tobi. or something like that. Keep it together? How was he supposed to do that? He didn't know. Masamune—the zingai—advanced towards him, splashing through the river water. Tobi couldn't understand anything anymore.

“Tobiiiiii…!”

Baku flopped around on Tobi’s back like a big fish that had just been reeled in. forced by Baku to jump to the side, Tobi ended up rolling in the mud. He was covered in mud, but thanks to that, they managed to dodge the charging zingai by a hair’s breadth.

“Eat, Tobi! We’re eating him!”

Baku forced him to his feet violently, forcefully.

“(“Uahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!”)”

Masamune—the zingai— opened that large, horrifying mouth on his stomach, and with a laugh that shook Tobi’s brain, the air, even the rain, prepared to charge again. Tobi’s head trembled.

“But if you eat that…!”

“If we don’t eat it, we’re gonna get eaten…!”

Was Baku insistent on eating that zingai no matter what? That meant eating Masaki Shuuji, who’d gone into this state due to losing his brother, along with it. Tobi gripped Baku’s strap tightly with both hands.

“No, you can’t…!”

Tobi tried to run. It was hard to find a good foothold on the muddy ground, but that didn't matter. Even if he couldn't run like he wanted to, he just had to run. More important than escaping, he had to get away from here, away from Masamune. Baku wanted to eat. Tobi could understand that feeling as well. He felt it so deeply it hurt. But if he let Baku eat, Tobi would definitely regret it. Masamune chased after him.

(Don’t) “Don’t” (Don't) “Ignore me!” (Otogiri!) “Otogiri Tobiiiiiii…!”

His foot caught in the mud. Tobi plunged　into the muddy ground head first. He couldn't see because of the mud, but Masamune seemed to have leapt at him. Taking advantage of the opportunity, Baku tried to sink his teeth into Masamune. Masamune jumped away briefly. Just as he thought that was what he was doing, he grabbed onto Tobi’s right ankle.

“Fuoh—”

Tobi was thrown. He flew in the air, through the rain. It was the river. He was falling into the river.

Right after landing in the water, something became entangled with Tobi. Was it Masamune? They were in the water, in the middle of the river. What was going on? Tobi flailed furiously. Baku, too, was fighting back. Somehow, they shook off Masamune, but even though he was heading towards the river bank, he wasn't moving forward at all. The water level was around Tobi’s chest. He could touch the ground with his feet, but decided to swim. It was no use. They were getting swept downstream. Ultimately, Masamune’s hand closed around his ankle once more.

“Ugua—...”

At one point Tobi was pulled to the bottom of the river. He gulped down lots of water; frankly he had no idea how he didn't end up drowning.

When he came to, he was in a spot where the water was less than knee deep. Had he gotten here on his own? Or had he been swept here? It was under the railroad bridge. Right at this moment, a train was passing through. He could see the pedestrian bridge. Someone was on the pedestrian bridge. They leaned against the railing, looking this way. It wasn't just one person. There were two.

“—Tobii!”

Baku called to him, and Tobi turned around.

It was no longer a voice. A roar that drowned out even the noise of the train passing overhead pierced his ears, and instantly Tobi’s brain felt like it was boiling. More than half of Masamune’s body had become his mouth. That was how widely the mouth on his abdomen opened. Masamune leapt on him. He was trying to eat Tobi and Baku. Did he want to eat that badly? He wanted to eat. He wanted to eat so badly, he just couldn't help it.

'''Because if you didn't eat, life couldn't continue existing.'''

'''You sustained this life, through eating.'''

'''Eat. If you didn't eat, you would just be eaten.'''

Unfortunately, Tobi found himself struggling as he choked on the water he had swallowed. His head felt fuzzy, rendering him unfit to eat in his current state. If things continued like this, he would be consumed before he had a chance to consume anything.

"Apologies for my tardiness...!"

From beside him, someone rushed over, preventing Masamune from devouring them both.

It was Haizaki, the janitor, dressed in his work clothes, who landed in front of Tobi.

Haizaki had been one of the people on the bridge moments ago. The fact that he had covered such a distance in mere seconds seemed almost superhuman. Was it truly possible?

Additionally, something peculiar caught Tobi's attention about Haizaki's right foot.

Haizaki's right foot appeared dark, covered tightly with leather or fur, contrasting with his left foot that was in regular work attire.

"Tobi-kun...!"

Shiratama's voice reached Tobi's ears. Haizaki had not been alone on the pedestrian bridge; Shiratama had been there as well. Running down the riverbank between the pedestrian bridge and the railroad bridge, she appeared unsteady, on the verge of stumbling. Tobi couldn't bear to witness it, yet now was not the time to worry about Shiratama engaging in dangerous actions. A sound, or rather a shriek devoid of its original voice, an ear-piercing noise, descended upon them.

"Ughh..."

Tobi struggled to maintain consciousness, while Haizaki, despite his apparent discomfort, remained resilient.

The zingai that had once been Masamune was no longer recognizable as such. It had transformed into a mouthless tarsier with bubbling skin, or rather, a zingai with an enormous mouth on its abdomen. It emitted relentless screams, blaming those near it, the people surrounding it, and above all, itself. Words no longer formed, only raw animosity, a fusion of hatred, fear, and resentment. And deep within, a swirling vortex of guilt. Haizaki's voice echoed as if he were being crushed.

"Where is the zingai's master...?!"

"He's inside it!" Baku responded.

Haizaki's question abruptly halted.

"Did the zingai seize control of its master and go on a rampage? Or did it consume its master...?"

The zingai, formerly Masamune, continued emanating a sorrowful fear veiled in hostility. Tobi silently implored it to stop, to cease its actions. Shiratama crouched halfway down the riverbank, her movements restricted. Tobi urged her not to approach, not to come any closer. She should stay there. She mustn't come over here. Tobi firmly grasped Haizaki's shoulder.

"What should we do?!"

"Well..." Haizaki shook his head slightly. His narrowed eyes resembled thin threads, and his trembling jaw conveyed his inner turmoil. Tobi understood it all. It was too late to save Masamune. Haizaki's eyes widened suddenly, brushing away Tobi's hand.

"You step back. I'll handle this."

The use of "I," or rather, "ore," instead of "watashi," indicated Haizaki's resolve. Tobi comprehended. Haizaki intended to deal with the zingai alongside Masaki Shuuji. Could he accomplish it? Through what means? Tobi had no way of knowing. If Haizaki stated he would handle it, Tobi had no choice but to entrust the task to him. Was Tobi truly at peace with that decision?

Restlessness overcame Baku, causing him to act wildly on Tobi's back. It was an unusual display.

Tobi immediately grabbed hold of Baku's strap in an attempt to restrain him. However, his efforts proved futile, forcing him to release the strap. He had no alternative but to let go. What would have occurred had he held on? Tobi pondered, unable to even fathom the possibilities.

Baku detached himself from Tobi's back and pushed Haizaki aside. Tobi didn't question whether it was truly Baku. Regardless of his form, Baku remained Baku. That didn't mean Tobi wasn't taken aback. To claim otherwise would be a blatant lie.

Baku turned his back to Tobi and Haizaki, standing upright on two legs. He possessed two arms, with large hands consisting of four fingers. Adorned in a long cloak-like garment, similar to the material of Baku's backpack, it was unclear if they were actual clothes or mere appearance. Baku's head took on a cylindrical shape, revealing nothing but a mouth.

"I'll be the one to do it...!"

"Go, Baku."

Tobi spoke those words, giving his approval. Baku didn't respond in kind.

The zingai that had once been Masamune charged forward. Instead of intercepting the attack, Baku took the initiative. With tremendous force, he leaped and suddenly seized the zingai's head. In that moment, Tobi noticed something peculiar. Baku's cylindrical head lacked any features except for a mouth, but on the backs of his massive hands, there were eyeballs.

"I'll tear it off...!"

Baku planted both feet on the shoulders of the zingai, formerly Masamune. Was he attempting to forcibly remove it, as one would a costume? It resembled ripping off a mask. But was such a method even feasible?

"NnununununununununununuuuuuuuaaaaaAAAAAAaa...!"

The zingai refused to remain passive. It thrashed its body violently, flailing its hands in an attempt to shake off Baku. A colossal splash followed. Together with Baku, the zingai plunged into the river.

(Not at fault!) (I am!) (You are!) (It's not my fault!) (It's yours!)

That voice reverberated within Tobi's mind. Haizaki glanced at Tobi, then refocused his attention on the zingai.

"Otogiri-kun, what's happening?!"

Tobi remained silent. Baku was Baku. That was the only certainty he could utter.

[[Image:HTEL 6.jpg|thumb]]

“Baku…!”

Shiratama had finally reached the shore. She was soaked, and maybe because she’d fallen, she was muddy all over. Chinu clung to her right shoulder.

“Do your best, Baku…!”

Shiratama understood that that was Baku. This was incredibly reassuring to him. Tobi spoke to Baku in his heart. For you too right, Baku?

Ever since his brother had disappeared, Tobi had been with Baku. They’d had nothing but each other. 

There were people who’d reached out a hand to Tobi. But Baku’s voice hadn't reached their ears. Even though Baku was Tobi’s precious partner. Baku was not a mere backpack. Even if he tried to explain that, it would've been no use. There was no way they would understand.

Shiratama was different. She understood that Tobi and Baku were inseparably bonded together. Because, just like how Tobi had Baku, Shiratama had Chinu.

Baku and the zingai grappled in the middle of the muddy stream. Unlike Shiratama, Tobi did not shout his support for Baku.  There was no need for that. Because Tobi was fighting as well. This was no figure of speech. Both Tobi and Baku were battling with their lives on the line. In the event that Baku was defeated, what would happen? Whether it was heart desolation or whatever, Tobi and Baku would perish right here.

Haizaki yelled.

“Aaah!”

Baku gripped the zingai’s head tightly with those eyeballed hands, not letting go. His right foot was on the zingai’s left shoulder, his left foot pressing against its chest. Right under that was the zingai’s mouth. The zingai’s abdominal mouth was snapping at Baku. Tear that zingai off Masamune before you get eaten. Just a bit. Just a tiny bit more. The zingai was considerably stretched. Thanks to that, it didn't look like a tarsier anymore. Its round eyes had become tall ovals. This was the limit. It couldn't stretch any more.

“URUuAAAAaAAAAAAaAAAaAAaAAAAAAAaaaa…!”

Baku raised a battle cry.

All at once, he tore it off.

After all that effort, tearing it off only took one moment.

The zingai had been reduced to a state resembling a lifeless, overstretched costume.

“Hahha! How’s that, Tobii…! Uhii—”

Holding the stretched zingai in his hands, Baku energetically dove into the Asakawa river. Was Masamune alright in the middle of the zingai? Something other than Baku and the zingai was flowing out. Was it a human? It was Masamune, wasn't it?

“We have to help him…!”

Trying to get to the river, Shiratama was stopped by Haizaki with a “Leave it to me!” Haizaki leapt into the air. With no run up; what incredible jump power. Was it because of that right foot? Haizaki reached Masamune’s side in a single jump and caught him in his arms.

Perhaps relieved, Shiratama let out a “Hya…”, and sank to the floor right there.

Holding the costume-like zingai, Baku splashed his way through the river.

“Wasn't that great, Tobi?!”

Tobi had Baku. Shiratama Ryuuko had Chinu. And Masaki Shuuji had that zingai.

“Yeah.”

As Tobi responded, Baku raised the costume-like zingai like he was going to throw it. His cylindrical head seemed to split open sideways; his mouth opened, wider and wider.

Baku did not eat the costume-like zingai whole, he chewed many times. But he almost ate it whole. Baku had eaten Masamune’s zingai.

Tobi saw it through, from start to finish. He didn't look away, or even blink. As Baku ate the zingai, Tobi felt his stomach swell as well. They’d eaten it. They’d gone and eaten it.

“Baku.”

When Tobi signaled with his left hand Baku went back to being a backpack. Tobi gripped the strap and hung it on his left shoulder, carrying Baku on his back.

Haizaki carried Masamune in his arms bridal style and climbed up from the river. Both his right leg and left leg were clad in work clothes. Twined around Haizaki’s neck was a weasel-like creature. Was that him? Haizaki’s zingai. It had probably been merged with Haizaki’s right foot until just now. Haizaki too, was the same as Tobi and Shiratama.

“Ryuuko.”

Tobi no longer felt any hesitation calling Shiratama like this.

Shiratama turned her face towards Tobi.

She looked like she was crying.

Or was it because of this unending rain?

“You’ll catch a cold.”

As Tobi said that, she nodded slightly. Then, her eyes narrowed ever so slightly, and the sides of her lips pulled upwards somewhat.

“No, Tobi-kun… Tobi’s the one who will.”


A while back, Tobi had once asked his brother a question.

"Hey, Onii-chan. Why does the rain stop?"

Tobi clung to the window, peering outside at the scenery. It had been raining since morning, and the window was slightly ajar. His brother stood next to the window, smoking a cigarette.

"Because nothing lasts forever," his brother replied.

"Will everything come to an end?"

"Anything that has a form will eventually perish. There's nothing on this earth that doesn't have a form. Everything and anything will reach its end someday."

"Even me and Onii-chan?"

His brother looked down at him and gently stroked his head.

Tobi recalled the smell of his brother's cigarette smoke.


The next morning, the intense rain had completely ceased. When Tobi went to school with Baku as usual, Shiratama was waiting for him at the shoebox. Asamiya was in the classroom, appearing unwell. However, when Tobi and Shiratama greeted him, he curtly returned the greeting. According to their homeroom teacher, Harimoto, Masamune, also known as Masaki Shuuji, was not feeling well and would be absent for a while. It was uncertain if he would ever be able to return to school.

Takatomo Miyuki. Kon Chiami. Masaki Shuuji. Class 3 of the second year had gained three empty seats within a short period of time. Despite this, their classmates remained composed, and the teachers carried on with their classes as usual. During class, Baku hummed a tune off-key, and Shiratama looked down, her shoulders trembling. Tobi lightly nudged Baku, who was hanging on his desk.

During the lunch break, Tobi visited the janitor's room along with Ryuuko. Haizaki appeared worn-out, his work clothes in disarray.

"Hey, you two. I'm glad to see you both looking well. As for Masaki-kun, you can leave that to me, okay?"

"But you don't look okay," Tobi spoke his mind straightforwardly.

Haizaki let out a dry laugh and shook his head. "For some reason or another, I ended up staying up all night. I used to be able to go for two or three days without sleep, but age catches up with you, you know? Basically, I'm just sleep-deprived, so I'm really fine."

"Sleep is important," Shiratama said simply. Haizaki exaggeratedly scrunched up his tired face.

"Even though I should be the one worrying about you two. It's all turned around."

Then, Haizaki called out, "Olver."

A small weasel-like creature emerged from under the large work table and swiftly climbed up Haizaki's body.

"I don't think this is your first time seeing him, but this is my zingai, Olver."

Olver stood on Haizaki's left shoulder, twitching its nose. Baku stretched up from Tobi's back and let out a sound of appraisal. Ryuuko politely bowed her head.

"Hello, Olver."

Haizaki nodded slightly, and Olver scampered back under the work table.

"As for me, I want you to spend your school life without worrying about unnecessary things as much as possible. To achieve that, I'll do everything within my power. I won't ask you to trust me, but that's what I intend to do. If you feel like it, please rely on me."

After school, as Tobi carried Baku and prepared to leave the classroom, Ryuuko's voice stopped him.

"Shall we walk home together?"

It was a strange, tingling sensation. Tobi had no reason to refuse, so he nodded.

The two of them walked along the bank of the Asakawa River. As they approached the bridge spanning the river, Tobi felt an urge to climb onto the railing.

"Aren't you going to climb up?" Ryuuko said, touching the railing.

Tobi lightly climbed up the railing.

"Good grief," Baku grumbled.

Ryuuko laughed and took Chinu out from her pouch, letting her perch on her right shoulder.

Further downstream, they could see the railroad bridge. Tobi momentarily recalled what had happened the day before.

They continued leisurely, with Tobi on top of the railing and Ryuuko on the footpath

.

"Anything and everything—"

Why he said such a thing, Tobi himself didn't know.

"—will end someday, huh?"

Ryuuko stopped and looked up at Tobi. Tobi also halted.

"I think about it too, from time to time."

Ryuuko placed her hands on her chest.

"For instance, about the moment this life ends. It becomes quite painful, and I can't bear it. If only it would never end, forever and ever."

Tobi turned his body to face the road and sat down on the railing. Ryuuko rested both hands on the railing.

Suddenly, a thought occurred to him.

Didn't his brother know? Didn't he foresee their separation? Nothing without form lasts, and anything with form eventually perishes. The time they spent living together as brothers would also be lost. His brother had prepared himself for that, hadn't he?

If he ever gained something precious, it would disappear, just like his brother.

He only had Baku.

As long as Tobi didn't let go, he could be with Baku. That's how it should have been.

He was mistaken.

Someday, Baku could also get eaten. Just like how Baku had eaten Kon and Masamune's zingai, someone else's zingai could devour Baku.

That was fine. Well, not really fine. Whenever the time came, it would come. If Baku were to be eaten, Tobi wouldn't remain unharmed.

Something important must have broken inside Takatomo. She was pushed to the edge and threw herself from that rooftop. And then, Takatomo's parents would lose their daughter. He wished that wouldn't happen. Tobi could do nothing but pray for Takatomo's recovery.

Kon Chiami and Masaki Shuuji had their zingai eaten by Baku. It seemed like neither of them had been aware of their zingai. Nevertheless, their zingai had always been close to them. They were an irreplaceable part of the two. A part of them had caused harm and hurt others.

So, there was no other choice.

Tobi had to do what he had done.


"Tobi."

"Yes?"

"If Tobi..."

"If I?"

"If, even just a little bit, you regret what you've done..."

Regret.

Tobi echoed those words in his heart.

Regret.

''I regret it.''

"Please share that regret with me."

Her gaze was fixed on a distant place.

A strong gust of wind blew.

Her black hair danced in the wind, revealing her bare face.

"If you feel sadness or loneliness thinking about the end of things, I want you to confide in me."

"That kind of thing..."

Tobi lowered his head.

"To tell you, and then what?"

"I don't know."

She clenched her lip tightly. Tobi stole a sideways glance at that expression.

"I just want you to tell me."

[[Image:HTEL 7.jpg|thumb]]

He didn't have any regrets.

That wasn't the issue. He felt a slight pang of guilt for not having regrets.

He wasn't sad, nor was he lonely.

What was he supposed to talk to her about, he wondered.

Did he have something he wanted to discuss or not?

At the moment, he didn't even know the answer to that.

"I've thought about it before, but..."

Tobi gazed up at the sky.

"Ryuuko, you're an unusual person, aren't you?"

"You're really just saying that now?" Baku mocked with a hint of malice. He could hear her laughter. Tobi sighed, observing the pale sky. Then, he chuckled softly.


'''To be continued.'''