Editing Suzumiya Haruki no Seitenkan:Volume1 Epilogue

'''Let me tell you what happened afterwards.'''
On my way to the bathroom during lunch break, I met Itsuko in the corridor.

"I really should thank you from the bottom of my heart." She said, greeting me with a smile, "This world has remained unchanged, and Suzumiya-san is here as usual. I’ll have to continue my work now, but don’t think I'm not ungrateful, it’s all thanks to you that we’re all still here.”

Damn right.

“Of course, it's still possible that this world was only created last night! In any case, it’s an honor to have known you and Suzumiya-san. I hope to get to learn more about you," Itsuko said, before taking off, waving her hand at me. "See you after school!"

I went to the Literature Club room during lunch break and there sat Nagato reading his book as usual.

He looked up at me. "For two and a half hours this morning, you and Suzumiya Haruki had disappeared from this world."

He opened his mouth and said this, and only this. Then he lowered his head and continued reading.

"I'm reading the book you lent me now.” I said “I should be able to return it to you in a week."

"I see." He responded, not looking up.

"Can you tell me if there are many others like you on this planet?"

"A lot."

"Does that mean there'll be those who might attack me like Asakura did?"

Nagato now lifted his head and looked directly at me. "I won't let them."

I decided not to mention the library.


----


After school in the club room, I met Asahina-senpai, who was wearing his uniform for once instead of his maid outfit. When he saw me, he practically threw himself at me in tears.

"I'm so glad, I can still see you..." Asahina-senpai cried with his face buried in my shoulder. "I thought you'd never...(sniff)....return to this (sniff) world..."

Perhaps he just realized he was embracing me, because Asahina-senpai suddenly released me at once.

"N-no, I can't! If Suzumiya-san sees this, the same thing will happen again!"

"I don't really get what you're saying, Asahina-senpai..."

Looking at the teary-eyed, adorable little Asahina-senpai, I tried to calm him down. "Why aren't you wearing your maid costume today?"

"It's being washed."

At this point, I suddenly remembered something, and pointed towards my heart. "Oh yeah, Asahina-senpai, you've got a star-shaped birthmark around here on your chest."

Wiping the tears away from his eyes, Asahina-senpai looked confused. He then loosened his tie and unbuttoned his shirt to take a look inside it.

"E-eh, that's weird... I never noticed it myself... H-hey! How did you find out!?" Asahina-senpai blushed furiously. Cute as always.

Your future self told me about it. I wonder if I should tell Asahina-senpai the truth?

Suddenly, I heard someone near the door clearing their throat. It was Haruki, who stood there with an evil grin.

“Having fun, Mitsuuru-kun?” He said, as he lifted the paper bag he was carrying. “Congratulations!” Haruki hummed a tune that sounded like it came from an old RPG. “You've gained a level in manliness! Come! Time to change!"

Haruki moved as swiftly as a martial arts master and grabbed Asahina-senpai, who was too surprised to move.

"N...nooooo~~!" Poor Asahina-senpai screamed endlessly as Haruki forcefully pulled off his uniform.

"Stop moving! Resistance is futile! This time it's a butler uniform! Aren't you glad you don't have to cross-dress anymore?”

"A...at least lock the door!"

Of course, I went outside, shutting the door.
Although I feel sorry for Asahina-san, I'm really looking forward to what I'll see when the door opens. I wonder how cute he'll be as a butler...

Ah yes, and Nagato was there as well, sitting in the corner as usual, quietly reading his book.


----


This time, I finally handed the SOS Brigade application form to the Student Council. If I didn't bribe the Student Council, there was no way they'd ever allow a club like the "Save the World by Overloading it with Fun: Suzumiya Haruki's Brigade" to exist.

That's why I changed the name slightly to the "Supporting the Student Council in Organizing the School Brigade" (abbreviated as the SOS Brigade), and I altered the club's activities summary to "providing all sorts of consultation services to any problems people may encounter at school, and to actively participate in local community services".

I don't know what that really means, but I guess it'll be OK as long as it makes sense grammatically. After that I'll just make some posters about those annoying consultations and stick them on the board. I have a feeling we won’t get any cases that Haruki would deem as “something interesting”.


On the other hand, Haruki's "Search for Mysterious Events" in the town continued under his command for the second memorable time today. According to precedent, today's activities should have involved wasting a whole weekend wandering around aimlessly, but today Asahina-senpai, Nagato, and even Itsuko all said they couldn't come as they had something important to do, so I ended up waiting all alone for Haruhi at the station ticket turnstiles.

I don't know what those three were up to, or whether they genuinely had something important. But since they aren't normal humans in the first place, it's not surprising that they would need to handle some very important matters in some place I'd never heard of.
I looked at my watch. There were still thirty minutes before the meeting time. I had stood here for thirty minutes already; in other words, I arrived an hour early. I did this not because I looked forward to today's activity, but because the SOS Brigade had an unwritten rule that whoever arrives last, whether they're late or not, has to pay a fine.

Besides, there's only two people involved in today's activity.

I lifted my head and saw a familiar figure, casually dressed in jeans and a t-shirt. He probably never expected me to arrive so early, and stood stunned on the spot. He then grumpily raised a hand in greeting and walked towards me. I didn't know whether his frown had to do with today's low attendance rate, or the fact that I arrived earlier than he did. I'll just have to ask him when we get to the cafe. Of course, Haruki will be the one paying.

By then, I'll have many things I want to talk to him about, like where the SOS Brigade is going from now on, Asahina-senpai's costumes, trying to have him talk to his classmates for once, and asking him what he thinks of Sigmund Freud's psychoanalytic techniques.

However, I need a good topic before I can start a real conversation with him.

Ah, I've already decided what to say. That's right, I've decided...

...To talk about aliens, time travelers, and espers.

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