Talk:Toradora!:Volume4 Chapter3: Difference between revisions
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"In an acrobatic display of leaping and latching onto one of Ryuuji’s arms, Taiga had landed a crab scissors move somewhere between his waist and thigh with her bare feet and climbed onto him." | |||
I realize that you're trying to connect 'acrobatic display' with the actions of leaping and latching, but it comes off as an awkward sentence. Suggestion: | |||
In an acrobatic display, Taiga leaped up and latched onto one of Ryuuji’s arms, landing a crab-scissors move somewhere between his waist and thigh with her bare feet while climbing onto him. | |||
--[[User:Akirasav|Akirasav]] 14:20, 9 October 2008 (PDT) |
Revision as of 21:28, 9 October 2008
"In an acrobatic display of leaping and latching onto one of Ryuuji’s arms, Taiga had landed a crab scissors move somewhere between his waist and thigh with her bare feet and climbed onto him."
I realize that you're trying to connect 'acrobatic display' with the actions of leaping and latching, but it comes off as an awkward sentence. Suggestion:
In an acrobatic display, Taiga leaped up and latched onto one of Ryuuji’s arms, landing a crab-scissors move somewhere between his waist and thigh with her bare feet while climbing onto him.
--Akirasav 14:20, 9 October 2008 (PDT)