Dark Elf:Volume1 Epilogue

Epilogue

Klaus Knockburn was greeted by a bow at a perfect 90-degree angle.

He had somehow managed to escape the Forest of No Return with his life and return to the royal capital. He found the familiar stone buildings and well-maintained roads. He heard the transit carriages and high heels clacking against the stone pavement. He was home. He could draw as much water as he could drink from the well pumps and he could order an extra-large meal at the restaurants as long as he forked over a bit of cash. His ordinary life was back.

And he found someone profusely apologizing out on the public street in front of a church. The armored knight named Elzane Livzy had her head bowed lower than his hips. Her massive twin ringlets were touching the ground. …He wanted her to stop. He just wanted normalcy back. His body couldn’t physically handle anything more at this point.

“I am so, so sorry!!”

“…”

…Everyone seeing this is going to assume some dumb commoner kid tried to confess to a noblewoman and she’s kindly giving her rejection in as polite a way as she can.

Worry, surprise, curiosity – the passersby all gave them subtly different looks. The royal capital contained people from countless regions and of every race and occupation imaginable. The group dressed in black mourning clothes was probably here for a funeral, but he also saw a lot of people who were more of a mystery, like someone in a clown costume, someone wearing a mask, someone with a large straw hat covering their face, and a middle-aged man with springs in the soles of his shoes. But the thoroughly-trained girl paid them no heed.

The armored knight raised her voice instead of her head.

“I unwittingly assisted the villain and threatened the life of an innocent boy – one of the very people I have dedicated my life to protect. I was careless – far too careless!! I swear to you I will make it up to you. Ask anything of me, boy!! Ask for my hand in marriage and it is yours!!”

Klaus stood as still as a statue, wondering if he was the only one feeling left behind by the flow of time. Breathing in and out made his broken rib throb with pain, but that wasn’t what mattered at the moment.

“Um, if you’ll do anything for me, then can you start by raising your head? Look, they’re holding a funeral right over there.”

“You…truly are a kindhearted person. I am moved from the bottom of my heart. I doff my cap to you. Now, there is no time to waste!! Let us be wed immediately!!!!!!”

Nothing he said was going to dissuade her from dragging him into the chapel to demand a wedding in the middle of that funeral. And Klaus had something else he needed to do now that he was back in the royal capital.

When he took off walking, the knight followed in a way that showed she was accustomed to serving people. Did that come from her service to the king? He was glad to see not even she was oblivious enough to walk around town with that enormous lance. She only had a small (and unnecessarily ornate) pillow sword at her hip for self-defense, but he knew she could do a lot with just that. She too kept her guard up during a simple stroll, but in a different way from the dark elves.

“Where are you headed, boy?”

“To school.”

Elzane’s shoulders and bright yellow croissants shook. As did her boobs accentuated by the chainmail like fishnet stockings or a boneless ham’s netting. She must not have had many pleasant memories about that place. Even though she was the one who always went to his rotten teacher for advice.

A silent and thoughtful mood set in over the two of them, perhaps due to the funeral they had seen underway. But time did not stop for them.

Klaus’s school was a magical education institute established by the state to increase the kingdom’s technological level. It was held in such high esteem that a portion of the vast royal court had been provided as a school building.

The boy flashed his student ID to the guard at the station and was allowed in. The school was known for its eccentrics, including Professor Dissection and his rotten teacher. There, no one would bat an eye at seeing a fortuneteller with a crystal ball in one hand or a mage girl in a white dress and a large straw hat covering her face.

“Oh, excuse me. Go on ahead.”

“You know, this is part of the royal palace. Spies and assassins are always a concern, so I really wish you would quit cutting in line like that. Especially when none of you ever seem to wear your uniforms which act as a secondary student ID.”

Once through the gate, Elzane’s expression changed. They could discuss things here that they didn’t want anyone to overhear while out on the open streets.

“Your kindness is frankly astounding,” whispered the knight walking alongside him.

“In what way?”

“The way you captured Rosehera alive instead of killing her. …I can’t believe you forgave her.”

He answered her stiff voice with a stiff voice of his own.

“Revenge wasn’t what she actually wanted. That’s all there is to it.”

Elzane no longer formally addressed her as “Lady Rosehera” or “Hope Elf Rosehera”, suggesting she now viewed her as a magical criminal who nearly destroyed the world. Klaus shrugged.

“Also, she is technically still a guest in our kingdom. If I killed her on the spot and didn’t even give her a chance for a fair trial, I would have made myself an international terrorist.”

That was what had happened with Sir Rainbook. The dark elves had done the right thing according to their rules, but that had earned them the ire of the human nobles.

He had needed to account for that.

Elzane sighed with exasperation in her sky blue eyes.

“It is true our Last Resort Unit just barely escaped this intact because you handed Rosehera over to us. But you didn’t need to leave that crown on her head, you know?”

“I went easy on her to protect the dark elves, not because I sympathized with her.”

He wanted to make that very clear. He could have easily killed her using Brashgain’s colossal form. Even if he was only mimicking that appearance, he had been a 10km dragon against what looked like a girl of 12. Really, he wanted some recognition of the skill that went into leaving her intact after that.

“Rosehera was behind it all. The humans and dark elves were only being manipulated by her. If we slide her into the villain position like that and then have her stand trial, the nobles lose any justification for attacking the dark elves, right?”

“Tacticians shouldn’t be so thoroughly adorable. I so want to marry you. But not everyone will accept that.”

“You mean that page named Loinbelt?”

That babyface boy had gone missing. Even after learning of the hope elf’s conspiracy and learning the world had come close to destruction, he had chosen to focus on taking revenge for Sir Rainbook.

It was elective time, which meant the halls were full of people moving around. The knight stood aside to let some students passed.

“To be honest, if he’s still inside the forest, he’s probably starving to death. No matter how he rations his supplies, he will be gradually running out.”

“And if he escaped the forest alive?”

“Then he would be licking his wounds and sharpening his fangs. But even then, the fact that he’s ‘disappeared’ means he hasn’t returned home. The knights function as a group. Unlike the heroic knights who fight all on their own in the famous stories, your power comes from being an organized group. And that holds true for your military and political power. Looking at the pure specs, an individual human’s magic is no match for a dark elf’s magic. It can be easy to miss after seeing that hope elf and magic sword, but they’re pretty powerful. Both as individuals and as a group.”

Who did Loinbelt see as his enemy now? And was he doing the right thing? It was a painful question for Klaus since the boy had saved his life once.

But chasing after him now would be meaningless. He doubted he would ever see him again. And while viewing the rows of doors operated by the school bell, he decided that might just be in both their best interests.

“Boy, why did Rosehera do what she did?”

“Isn’t it your job to question her about that while waiting for her to recover? I left her with you because I trusted your skill in that matter, so don’t come crying to me before you even get started.”

He had to avoid any preconceptions, but he felt a few pieces to that puzzle had been sprinkled throughout.

Why had Rosehera secretly possessed the legendary T.E.O.D.? Why had she insisted on using Brashgain as her method of destroying humanity? He sensed an obsession there.

Had humans treated her badly in the past? He had said that to provoke her during their battle, but it didn’t seem to fit. Her anger had remained under her control, suggesting he had missed the mark. But something else had shaken her much more: when he and Slender had chosen to work together after he revealed Rosehera to be the real villain. When he had said he wouldn’t abandon the dark elves, she had become fixated on something unnecessary to her plan.

She had demanded he show her “a bond that cannot be broken even in death”.

“Maybe she had her heart broken in the distant past.”

“That sounds romantic and all, but I would hate to think the world was nearly destroyed over that. I also don’t want to think about someone so small having such an ugly love story in her past.”

Klaus and Elzane walked to his elective lab. The small room full of documents was deserted.

However…

“I knew it,” groaned the skinny boy when he looked toward the window.

The warrior girl hesitated and ultimately did not have the guts to place a hand on the trembling boy’s shoulder.

“I knew that rotten teacher was still alive!!”

Hearing him shout, a girl with a large straw hat pulled over her face peeked in from the lab entrance. A message was written out on the window in alluring lipstick.

“You did well to escape that forest alive, my #1 student, but you have much room for improvement. That forest belongs to the dark elves, so even if you were battling that hope elf, you should have risked your human life to ensure none of it was destroyed or consumed. I have docked you several points for that.

“Do you know why Hope Elf Rosehera was fighting?

“Do you know the real name of the girl you decided to call Slender?

“The answers were right there all along. Simple observations and an understanding of their words and actions would have led you there.

“If you cannot answer those question, then I can’t give you a passing grade for this fieldwork.

“-Magical Biology Court Scientist Reika Kickpleats

“P.S. I left a gift from the dark elves on the desk: assorted dried fruits. They are preserved, but don’t wait to eat them. Leave any and it’s punishment time for you☆”

“Heh.”

Klaus hung his head and tried his best to suppress his body’s trembling.

What was this? He had come so close to dying, fought for his wife, saved the world from destruction, broken his rib, and come back alive, but she was going to fail him!? That meant he would have to write an extra report to make up for it. He was already dead tired and now he had to silently complete some totally unfair homework assignment like some kind of cruel joke!? And all while she ignored the fact that she had been dead wrong when she so confidently stated the dark elves were trying to resurrect Brashgain!?

…Also, was she watching me that whole time? And from pretty close up if she’s referencing the granny’s dried fruit. There’s no stopping a genius when they’re that skilled. She hasn’t even learned my camouflage magic, so how in the world was she following us around and observing us the entire time?

Yes. Yes, he could just see it.

In the near future, in this very lab, he would be stuck there dealing with some hellish assignment to avoid being held back, but then she would situate her butt on his desk, cross her long legs, and smile down at him with a look of utter confidence. And then she would say something like, “Let’s see, what can I have you do to avoid failing the year?”

His patience had already been pushed to the limit and now it was pushed even further.

“Nwoooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!???”

His injured rib didn’t even matter. He kicked the leg of his desk, slammed his fist into the side of the bookcase, gathered up the documents, divided them by subject matter, dusted the desk with a duster, and wiped it clean with a rag. He had started off lashing out in anger, but the next thing he knew he was tidying up all the documents piled up on the lab’s desks and floor. He even made sure the window looked good as new even though that lipstick message was a lot harder to clean up than it would have been to write. He had always had a knack for converting his anger into housework.

Elzane Livzy looked like she had fallen in love while crossing her arms in front of her chainmail-covered chest.

“Boy, I insist we get married this instant!! I have so many rooms at home I want you to clean!!”

“Pant! Pant!!”

Klaus’s shoulders rose and fell while he wiped sweat from his brow.

Now that he had calmed down, he worked his mind like a researcher and arrived at another conclusion.

…A gift. The window message said the dried fruit was a gift. That means that rotten teacher was interacting with the dark elves. Is her goal to fully decode their language? No, does she want to compile her own dictionary, become the only person in the world who can contact them, and act as an intermediary for trade? So did she intentionally cause trouble in the forest to rattle that peaceful village and make them feel the need to work with humans? Which would mean she made them think her own student might have parasites and that they would try to help me by smoking them out!? And her very first trade good is that dried fruit. That! Goddess-Awful! Rotten! Teacherrrrr!!

There was so much he wanted to say.

But there was one thing he had to say first.

“Ugh, cough. Pant, pant. I am not marrying you.”

“Ehh!?”

“Why would that come as a surprise? Try to remember you’re younger than me.”

“And what is wrong with that? I don’t know the details, but I believe this kingdom’s Specialized Aristocracy Law says the minimum marriage age is either 12 or 13, and that includes shared inheritance rights over both parties’ assets.”

“Why haven’t any of your butlers or aides told you you’re crazy!? They might think they’re being kind, but this is how nobles end up so damn messed up!!”

Also, why did they have special marriage laws for the aristocracy? He wanted to scream. Did nobles start thinking about marriage at a younger age? Was that why that big-boobed knight (who was actually younger than him) wouldn’t shut up about marriage? It felt like the opposite of the dark elves who were actually old ladies but were young in mind and body.

Klaus Knockburn fidgeted with his left hand. He wore a simple handmade ring on its ring finger. He still had no intention of removing it. That may have been a statement of sorts.

“Please stop joking about marriage. Especially in front of her.”

And.

He removed the straw hat from the person standing next to him.

From the mystery girl in a white dress who was sticking just her head into the lab.

“My wife might not understand our language, but she can still pick up on the nuance.”

“Wait, whaaaat!? Why is that dark elf still alive and what is she doing outside of the forest!?”

After all, she had been run through by a legendary magic sword. She had intentionally let it stab her to protect Klaus and then held it inside her body when it tried to leave. That should have been a fatal wound.

But Glasses of the priests was their elder because of her true value that only showed itself during emergencies.

Yes, he could never stop observing. The dark elves had been defeated by Elzane and Rosehera once, but had he seen even one of them wrapped in bandages or otherwise showing signs of injury when he visited their village? No, he had not. That was thanks to Glasses’s true power.

The recovery version of Archdragon Magic was also extraordinarily powerful. He had stopped her bleeding with his cloak and belt and then he had carried her back to the village.

And…

He had worked at convincing Slender to listen to him. He had begged and pleaded while she squirmed awkwardly (but never ran way). It had taken him days of trying every idea he could come up with. Little Girl, who was actually an old lady, and Glasses, who always wanted to be of some help, had even slapped him on the shoulder to cheer him up. Either he had looked pretty pathetic or they were eager to see how that love story would end. To know which, he would need to continue observing the dark elves.

He could not disregard her now that she had saved his life. He would normally only have one chance in his life to try for that village, but he could come and go as he pleased now that he had passed that trial. That just left his human life to worry about.

“Oh, goddess dammit.”

His rotten teacher really was a genius. She could sniff things out better than most. She would have known exactly what he was up to the entire time he was out there.

“That’s the reaction I wanted to get from that rotten teacher,” spat out Klaus with a tongue click.

The church bell rang. Sir Rainbook’s funeral would be ending soon.

Klaus’s attempted surprise had failed, but that rotten teacher had still made herself scarce so she didn’t have to deal with all three of them at once. That self-centered garbage never budged on anything, so now she was likelly running around dealing with some plans unrelated to him. He would count that as a win for now.

“Ugh, I’m still not used to this.”

He heard some of that unique (and artificially constructed) dark elf language.

There was no scar on her stomach, but she still rubbed it on occasion.

Slender seemed overwhelmed by the stone roads, stone buildings, and all the people. She would put the large straw hat back on every chance she could to hide her splendidly long ears. It may have been a replacement for her bunny-ears hood.

The truth was, very few human states officially recognized civil rights for magical lifeforms. They were even depicted as villains in children’s stories a lot of the time. But on an individual level, few of the people would go out of their way to harm her. She still had to be on the lookout for crazed animal abusers or slave traders hoping to capture her, but the humans also had to watch out for those abnormal criminals.

Her nerves were understandable when an extreme exception like Professor Dissection had been one of her first experiences with humans, but she didn’t really need to be so afraid. She could live here just fine if she was just as cautious as an ordinary person was of being caught up in a crime.

…She can live here.

The reality of the situation was catching up to him. He had to find a place for Slender to live. Wait, or do I? he asked. The more seriously he considered it, the further he strayed from his original plan of “Welp, you’ve no choice but to come live with me!! Yes, no choice at all!!”

Incidentally, he had yet to return her earring.

Even though they had exchanged rings.

Every time he tried to, she would shake her head and refuse it. It may have been some kind of magic charm to her. Hadn’t she said the pair of accessories would draw destined lovers together?

“Damn, and here I thought you got to marry a dark elf if you saw her naked and stripped of all her equipment.”

“You thought what?”

So much for that legend. Another casualty at the hands of communication.

“What do I do now?”

A few of the people walking on the main road looked back at them when they spoke the unfamiliar dark elf language. From the dark elf’s perspective, she was surrounded by unintelligible humans, so she may have been nervous.

She could still sense the questioning tone of their voices, though. While she looked cool and composed, she reached out hand grabbed his clothes with her brown fingertips. Cute. She furrowed her brow worriedly Super cute!!

“We can learn each other’s languages bit by bit. I’ll translate for you until then. That rotten woman is technically a teacher and there’s no way I can’t pull it off after she taught me.”

“?”

She tilted her head.

Is she trying to kill me with cuteness? Does she radiate beams that make you fall in love with her!?

“Slender, is there anything you’re interested in seeing? Or someplace you want to go? The other dark elves told you to go see the outside world and learn about our culture, right? Then you need to get started.”

“Yes.”

The dark elf girl placed her index finger on Klaus’s lips.

This rattled his brain.

Thank the goddess I survived to see this day!!!!!!

He was willing to give up his dark elf research and focus all his time on being the world’s leading expert in Slender research.

Then she breathed in and out.

And she spoke with a wink.

Their next adventure was sure to be even more exciting than running around the forest and battling the hope elf.

“First, I want to see your home.”

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