Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume3.5 Me and the Pool and the Swimsuit Wonderland
Me and the Pool and the Swimsuit Wonderland
After the event last weekend 'Yuuji and Kirishima-san's wedding plan' ended safely, it's another weekend night. My bad friend Yuuji came over to my house to play, and at the same time, stay overnight at my house.
"Eh? What did you buy, Yuuji?"
"Of course it's food. You don't have anything to eat here."
Yuuji said as he puts the plastic bag in his hand down onto the table.
"Heh~you're rather thoughtful to actually think of bringing a gift over.
I open the plastic bag, and there's a lot of food and drinks inside.
-Cola
-Iced coffee
-Cup noodles
-Instant fried noodles packet
There are two servings of food and drinks. I'm so grateful for that.
"Oh yeah, what will you take, Yuuji?"
I asked Yuuji, who's taking his coat off.
As for what to choose, of course, I'm talking about food and drinks. I'm OK with cola or coffee, and I'm also fine with eating instant or fried noodles. Actually, I'm happy just to eat anything. But since Yuuji bought these things, I should let him choose.
"Me? Well, I'll take..."
Yuuji should be taking the fried noodels and cola, right? Even if I don't ask, I can guess what this guy likes to eat.
"--The cola and the coffee and the instant noodles and the friend noodles."
"YUUJI YOU BASTARD! YOU'RE JUST LETTING ME EAAT THE DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICKS!?"
"HOLD ON A MINUTE, YOU'LLL EVEN EAT THE DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICKS AS WELL? YOU JUST SHOCKED ME THERE!!"
Yuuji immediately stopped me.
"Besides, if I don't have any disposable chopsticks, don't I have to eat with my bare hands?"
It's really hard to imagine Yuuji eating instant noodles with his thumb and index fingers while shouting 'HOT, HOT!'.
"Forget about getting my chopsticks, I got your share as well."
"Eh? Really?"
"Yeah. Don't you see the other bag over there? The food inside is for you."
Now that he said that, I just noticed it. I didn't notice because the first bag was blocking, but on a closer look, there is another bag there.
"What, so you actually prepared my share."
"Ya, because I caused you to spend so much effort last week, so this is just a little token of appreciation.
"Hmm, now that you mentioned it, my hard work has somewhat paid off."
I pick up the bag that's pressed because and open it, there's food and drinks inside as well.
'Fruit jelly
'Diet coke'
'Jelly'
"MY PRECIOUS CALORIESSSSSS!!!"
Seeing the food that don't contain any calories, I couldn't help but cry.
"Don't worry, this is just my little token of appreciation."
"DAMN IT, YOU NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT THANKING ME, RIGHT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I WENT THROUGH JUST TO PREPARE THAT PLAN OF YOURS!?"
I pull my diet coke out and get read to fire.
"YOU'RE TOO NOISY! WHAT ABOUT YOU, DON'T YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I HAD TO SUFFER AFTER THAT!?"
Yuuji reaches into his plastic bag and pulls out his can of coke.
The evil atmosphere flows between us.
"...So Yuuji, you're ready to go at it?"
"Ya, besides, I think there's a need to have a showdown between us."
"Just what I want. I'll make you regret doing such a stupid thing as to challenge me!"
"Ha! You're all talk!"
We glare at each other as we get ready to move. The opponent's Yuuji, I'll die if I'm not careful.
In an instantaneous moment, the sound of water droplets dripping can be heard throughout the kitchen.
--Drip.
"--UU!"
With the drip of water as the signal, the situation went from a silent stare down contest to a firece battle. Both of us took action at the same time. If so, the winner will be decided on the next action--
PAAAZZZZZZZZ! (The sound of Yuuji and me shaking our bottles.)
GGYYYYYAAAAHHHHH!!! (The sound of cola being fired at each other.)
PATAPATAPATAPATAPATAPATA!!! (The sound of Yuuji and me covering our eyes and rolling on the floor.)
""MY EYES!!! MYYY EEEEEEEEYYYYYYYEEEEEEEESSSSS!!!!""
It went in! The cola just went into my eyes!
"Not bad, Akihisa!"
"You're not too bad yourself, Yuuji! As expected for the guy I see as a tough opponent!"
"But I'm going to get serious from now on!"
"I won't lose to you as well!"
Thus, Yuuji starts to grab the can of coffee, and I arm myself with the jelly to bet on this battle of pride.
--Please hold on a minute--
"...Yuuji, want to call a ceasefire?"
"...Ya, this is getting too meaningless."
Before we realised it, we're all stained with fruit jelly, jelly and cola. It sure is disgusting.
"Akihisa, lend me your shower."
"Hm, you can use the towel."
"I'll do that even without you telling me that."
After saying that, Yuuji seems irritated as he pulls the completely drenched clothing on his body as he walks towards the changing room. I then hear him taking off his clothes casually,
"Ah, Yuuji, I forgot to tell you something."
"What?"
Yuuji's voice can be heard from behind the bathroom door, and soon, there's the sound of the water tap being turned on.
"My gas got cut off, so there's no hot water now."
"GWAAHH--!!!"
Clrack! Tatatatata!
"...You could have told me that, you big idiot!"
Wrapped up in a towel, Yuuji's having goosbumps due to the cold.
"Sorry sorry, I forgot to say it. Also, it's not good for your body to put cold water on your heart. You have to first let it drop onto you feet--"
"WHO NEEDS YOU TO EXPLAIN HOW TO TAKE A COLD SHOWER!?"
"Why are you so angry, Yuuji? Oh yeah, you should take a cold shower to cool yourself off."
"I'M ANGRY BECAUSE OF THAT, YOU IDIOT! DAMN IT, I'LL GET A COLD IF THIS CONTINUES..."
"Uu~ Hm...even if you say that, it can't change the fact that my house doesn't have any hot water..."
Even if I have money with it, I have to contact the gas supplier to provide me with some. Now that it's so late, the company workers shouldn't be working now. No matter how urgent we are, we have to wait till tomorrow, and there doesn't seem to be any public baths near my house. It may be a bit too strange to run over to somebody else's house just to bath.
"Sigh...can't be helped. Akihisa, get ready to go out."
Just as I'm wondering what to do, Yuuji, who changed back into his clothes, suddenly said that to me.
"Going out? Ah, I see, are we going to Yuuji's house?"
"I don't mind, but since we're going to bath, how about we go to someplace that has a bathroom and a swimming pool?"
"A place that has a swimming pool as well?"
Was he talking about a resort somewhere slightly far away from here?
But if we're going to leave now, it'll take some time before we reach there.
"That's right, it has a bathroom and a swimming pool, it's close to your house, and it's free--isn't there such a great place?"
A bathroom and a swimming pool, close to my house and free--ahh, I see.
"OK, I'll get prepared. What about your swimsuit, Yuuji?"
"I'll just wearing my boxers, they aren't any different from my swimming trunks."
"Got it~"
I immediately get ready and head towards Fumitzuki Gakuen with Yuuji.
"...So, do you have anything to say?"
Two hours later, Yuuji and I are standing in the office of Fumitzuki Gakuen, as we continue to have the lecture from Ironman--also known as Nishimura-sensei.
""It's that guy's fault.""
Our voices overlap each other perfectly, and even the pointing of fingers is completely the same.
"What the heck! Yuuji's definitely in the wrong here! If you had brought some gifts along, this wouldn't have happened!"
"What nonsense are you saying now? If you had paid your gas bills properly, none of this would have happened!"
"What are you saying now? Isn't it good enough that you haev water to shower?"
"Don't tell me you have times when the water doesn't come out?"
"...That's enought, I understand what's going on."
Ironman sighs deeply.
"You understood? That's great."
"Since you understood, we should be leaving now. It's kinda late now."
"Yup. Well, we'll be moving off then, Nishimura-sensei--WOAH!!"
Just when I bowed and prepare to walk out of the office, Ironman's burly arms suddenly drapes around Yuuji and my neck. We, we can't breathe!
"You two, no need tp be in such a rush, right? It's never too late to have that obligatory moment first, right?"
The strong force grabs our necks. If we try to resist anyhow, our necks will break!
"That, that's right...then please...allow me..."
"Me, me too, allow me to..."
Our self-defense instincts kicked in, and we can only accept this proposal in tears.
"Very good, then let's begin."
After releasing us, Ironman pulls out paper and pens from somewhere and passes them to us.
"Listen up, translate the following into English 'I reflect on having used the pool without authorization'."
I followed what Ironman said and translate the Japanese into English. Hansei suru (反省する) should be translated into 'reflect on'.
"...After writing so many reflection letters,you finally managed to come up with the words 'reflect on'."
"That's because I had to write it twice every week..."
"If you don't want to write it, correct your mistakes--okay, after you're done, show me what you wrote."
"Yes."
I hand over the piece of white paper with English words on it to Ironman. Ironman reads what I wrote--and for some reason, sighed.
"Eh? Why are you saying?"
That's strange, the English I wrote should be perfect.
'Sakamoto, read this."
Ironman hands over what I translated to Yuuji. After Yuuji receives it, he starts to read what I wrote.
"I reflect on having used the poor without owner's permission."
It was what Yuuji has said, there shouldn't be any problems, right?
"Translate that."
"'I reflect on having made used of the poor without authorization'."
"ARE YOU A SLAVE DRIVER!?"
"Eh, that, that's strange? Why did it become like that?"
"YOU BIG IDIOT! HOW DID YOU MISTAKE THE WORD 'POOR' AS 'POOL'!? AREN'T THESE WORDS THAT WE LEARNED IN MIDDLE SCHOOL!?"
Damn it, that was the only part I thought up myself.
"Okay, next. 'For my reflection, I will voluntarily clean up the pool next week'."
"Is that so? Then it's tough on you. Please do your best."
"(BAM!!) TRANSLATE THAT INTO ENGLISH!"
"Uuu...you devilish teacher..."
Using your fist to hit me? That damned violent teacher!
"Damn it. We're really unlucky that Ironman found us out."
"(BAM!!) CALL ME NISHIMURA-SENSEI!!"
Thus, until daylight, Yuuji and I were forced to have fist-involved remedial lessons.
“Because of that, my weekend got burned.”
Morning morning, before self-study period starts, the same old gang gathers around the desk as I said that.
“Such a thing actually happened. What a disaster...”
Revealing a gentle expression as he worries for me is my classmate, Kinoshita Hideyoshi. Anyone who sees him will definitely think that he's a beauty, but biologically, he's a male; truly an unfathomable friend.
“And we're punished to clean up the swimming pool this weekend. Sigh...”
We took so many punches and wrote so many English reflections, and now he wants me to clean the swimming pool. This is totally ridiculous. That Ironman's definitely a devil on the inside and the outside.
“..That's overwork.”
Beside us, Tsuchiya Kouta (a.k.a. Muttsulini) said calmly,
“Ya, I'm already feeling tired when I think about having to clean up such a large place.”
If there were some sort of reward...
Seemingly understanding what I'm thinking, Yuuji then says,
“It isn't much of a reward, but Ironman did say 'since you have to clean up, the pool will be available to you on that day'.”
“Eh? Really?”
So this means that the school pool this weekend will be open for us to use?
“Ya, so Hideyoshi, Muttsulini, you guys want to come along?”
Since we already got the place, it'll be a waster if only Yuuji and me are the ones using it. It's pointless to have it if we can't get some more people. Besides, it's boring to have 2 people alone, and I really hope that Hideyoshi and Muttsulini will come along.
Just as Muttsulini prepares to raise his hand—
“But Muttsulini, you have to help out with the cleaning.”
“...”
On hearing Yuuji's words, Muttsulini stopped what he's about to do.
Like what Muttsulini said just now, cleaning the pool is a seriously tough job. It can't be helped that he would hesitate.
“On a side note, I intend to ask Himeji and Shimada to come along.”
“...I'll prepare the brushes and cleaning agents.”
It is normal that he would agree so easily; if I can get to see Himeji-san, Minami and Hideyoshi in swimsuits, I'll do anything just for that one chance.
“Um, that's right. If we didn't get this chance to use the pool, it'll be unlikely that we'll have this once in a lifetime chance. Please allow me to join in. Of course, I'll help out as well.”
“Eh? Cleaning the pool is tough? Are you sure that you're willing to do so?”
“Um, unlike getting the whole pool, I just need to clean the pool, so this is nothing.”
Hideyoshi agreed heartily..actually, I'm fine with just seeing him in a swimsuit, so there's no need for him to help out. He's really a good guy.
“So there's only two left. OI~ HIMEJI, SHIMADA.”
Yuuji shouted out their names.
“What's up, Sakamoto? Anything you want me for?”
The one who walks over first is the girl who recently returned from Germany. Shimada Minami-san.
Her unique characteristics are her tsurime eyes and her ponytails. She's a very forceful girl, and there were a few times when I nearly died in her hands.
“Did you call me, Sakamoto-kun?”
Walking over next is our class air freshener, Himeji Mizuki-san. Gentle and cute, outstanding grades, and even her figure's excellent. She's a girl who can't be nitpicked about, and with all these attributes, she's really scary . No, hold on, Minami's not too far behind...
“Are you free this weekend? We got the school pool this weekend, want to come along?”
““Eh?””
On hearing the word 'pool', both of them seem stunned. Is there anything wrong with the pool?
“Ah, so you girls obviously have some other plans, right?”
If possible, I really want them to come along, but I can't just force them to cancel their schedules. They should put their own schedules before anything else.
?It, it's not that. I don't really have anything. But...what should I do? If I have to go to a pool, I have to wear a swimsuit, right?”
“That, that's right, got to wear a swimsuit...but my...”
Minami stares at her chest, and Himeji-san stares at her abdomen.
What in the world are they worrying about?
“Sigh, I know that you girls have your own troubles...but let me tell you first. Hideyoshi will be coming along, and he said that he wants to show Akihisa how he looks in a swimsuit.”
Seeing them hesitate, Yuuji suddenly said such a ridiculous thing. It's true that Hideyoshi will come alone, but he's not going to just show me how he looks in a swimsuit.
But after hearing what Yuuji said, Minami and Himeji-san turn to glare at Hideyoshi.
“That, that's too despicable, Kinoshita! You're doing that when you're so confident in your own fiure!”
“That, that's right! Kinoshita-kun's too sneaky!”
“What are you two talking about?”
Hideyoshi gives a puzzled look after being blamed by them. I don't understand it myself—why are they saying that Hideyoshi's despicable?
“So, how is it?”
“I, I'll go! I, I just need to make preparations...”
“That, that's right. Preparations are important.”
Though both of them reveal a complicated look, at least they agreed. That's great.
“Speaking of which, I should start buying a new swimwear. How about I use this chance to get one...”
Hideyoshi strokes his chin as he said this. Hideyoshi's buying a swimsuit? Now I'm excited.
“The, then I'll buy one as well...”
Maybe because of Hideyoshi, Minami seems like she intends to buy a new swimsuit.
Sure is nice to have money...unlike me with my gas cut off...
“Eh? But Minami, didn't you say 'I'm not buying one since I got one last year' when we were talking about buying swimsuits...?”
“Mi, Mizuki! Don't say such a thing! This, this time, what I want to buy is...that's right, it's a duel, so that's different.”
“Shimada, the more nervous you get, the more you're digging your own grave.”
“...You're thinking too much.”
I don't understand what they're talking about. She meant a swimming match, right? To be actually serious in having a swimming contest, does Minami really enjoy swimming that much?
“Ah, oh ya! Yuuji, get Kirishima-san to come over.”
“I'll do that even without you telling me that.”
Yuuji looks reluctant as he gives me an intriguing look. That's strange? How did it end up like this? I thought Yuuji wouldn't even tell Kirishima-san about this. Did he become honest after the wedding event last week?
“Haha, so Yuuji finally matured.”
No, that's not the problem.”
Then what is it?”
“Akihisa, think about it. Try putting yourself in my shoes. If I don't tell her, when Shouko finds out, what will happen to me?”
Seeing Yuuji look so seriously, I start to think seriously.
Let me think, if I'm Yuuji, and if Kirishima-san knew that I was playing with girls in swimsuits at the pool...”
“Deep into a marsh...no, buried at the bottom of a lake...”
“You don't have to imagine me being a corpse, but anyway, that's the case.”
I see. Because of this, Yuuji would reluctantly invite Kirishima-san. But if so, I can see Kirishima-san in a swimsuit. That can be considered a dream come true.
“Anyway, seems like everyone's okay with the arrangements. Let's meet at 10am on Saturday at the school gate. Don't forget to bring your swimsuits and towels along.”
Just as Yuuji said this, the loud bang of Ironman opening the classroom door can be heard.
“Morning~ this weather today sure is great for swimming.”
It's the weekend, and under the clear blue cloudless sky, I raise my hand and say hello to Hideyoshi and Himeji-san, who are already waiting at the school gate.
“Morning Akihisa. The weather sure is great today.”
“Good morning, Akihisa-kun. Seems like we can enjoy ourselves today.”
Both of them respond with bright smiles. Just the fact that I can meet them during a holiday is enough to send me into lala-land. However, to top it all, I can see them in swimsuits! It's not an exaggeration to call it heaven!
Just as I raise my fist triumphantly, another figure approaches. Is that Muttsulini? He heard us, right?
“Morning, Muttsulini~”
“...! (Krack krack krack)”
At this moment, Muttsulini shows a 'don't come near me look' as he holds a camera in his hands.
“Well, I say~ Muttsulini...”
“...I'm busy now.”
Muttsulini merely said a few words, as if it's irritating to look at me for the slightest moment.
It's not that I don't understand his feelings, but—
“Muttsulini, it's good to prepare, but wouldn't you be doing that in vain?”
“...Why?”
“Isn't that obvious? Muttsulini...will be unconscious due to nosebleeding.”
Cheongsams were already enough to let him drown in the sea of his own nosebleed. If he sees the revealing swimming outfits, Muttsulini definitely won't be able to maintain consciousness.
But after hearing what I said, Muttsulini merely shrugs his shoulders.
“...If you're going to belittle me like that, I'll be really bothered.”
At the same time, Muttsulini opens the huge sports bag he brought and shows me what's inside.
“...All the blood transfusion processes are complete.”
“Hm, so you intend to take measures to prevent blood loss? That's quite manly.”
The sports bag is jammed full with blood packets. I don't know how he got them, but if so, there should be no need to call an ambulance. Seems like he's completely prepared for this.
“Speaking of which, Hideyoshi, didn't you say that you want to bring a new swimsuit? You didn't forget, right?”
“Nn, of course I did bring it.”
Hideyoshi prouds straightens himself and opens his bag. That's great. It'll be too pitiful if he can't swim because he forgot to bring his swimwear.
“Speaking of which, what I got is—”
“...! (widen eyes)”
Hideyoshi's declaration that makes people's hearts flutter causes Muttsulini to widen his eyes. Of course, I'm interested as well. What did Hideyoshi buy?
“—Squared swimming trunks!”
““HOW DID IT END UP LIKE THIS!!!???””
Muttsulini and I collapse onto the floor. Squared swimming trunks? Something that guys wear? God, why did you give us such a trial!? Wouldn't Hideyoshi wearing guy's trunks ruin everything!?
“Because you guys seem to view me as a girl, I thought I should let you guys see that I'm a guy—why aren't you guys listening to me?”
“THAT'S TOO MUCH, HIDEYOSHI!! DO YOU HATE ME THAT MUCH!!?”
“...I was wrong about you!”
“Wha, what's wrong? Why must I be scolded by you?”
“I, I guess you shouldn't mind too much, Kinoshita-kun.”
Damn it! I thought that only Hideyoshi won't betray me!
Just as I'm thinking of ways to get other swimwear for Hideyoshi to wear—
—Tatatatata!
“Good morning, baka onii-chan!”
“WAHH!!”
Moments after I head the footsteps behind me, something seemed to jump on me. What's going on?
“hazuki, really! That'll scare Aki!”
Soon after, there's another familiar voice.
Since that's Minami's voice, the one on my back is—
“So it's Hazuki-chan. Good morning to you.”
“Heh heh heh, it's been two weeks since we last met.”
The one on my back completely displays the attributes of 'childish and innocent' as she shows me a radiant smile is Minami's little sister—Shimada Hazuki. I remember she should be in 5th grade, right? We haven't met since the summoning tournament, and like what Hazuki said, it's been two weeks.
“Baka onii-chan's so cold. Why didn't you ask Hazuki to come along? That's too much!”
“Ah, mm, sorry, Hazuki-chan.”
But if I told you that, your sister will dice me up.
“Hazuki found me out when I was about to go out, and she wanted to come along, so I had no choice...”
Minami sigheed. I see, so that's why she's late.
“Eh? Sakamoto's not here? I thought I would be the last one.”
“No, Sakamoto-kun already arrived. He went to the staff room to borrow the keys—ah, seems like he's here.”
Speak of the devil. Just when Himeji-san was mentioning where Yuuji went, we can see him and Kirishima-san walking over from the school compund.
“Morning Yuuji, and good morning, Kirishima-san.”
“Oh, seems like you weren't late.”
“...Good morning.”
Yuuji revealed his arrogant nature the moment he spoke up, and the beautiful girl who's silently stnading beside him as she greets us is Kirishima-san, Yuuji's childhood friend. She's not just a beauty, she's also the valedictorian of our second year in Fumitzuki Gakuen. It's said that she's pretty athletic, so there doesn't seem to be any weaknesses—but the sad part is that she doesn't have the eyes in choosing a guy. Besides, there's nothing that can be said about her choosing Yuuji.
“Hello, onii-chan!”
Seeing Yuuji's rough appearance, Hazuki-chan isn't scared at all as she said hello to him energetically.
“Hm? The pipsqueak's here.”
“I'm not a pipsqueak, my name's Hazuki!”
“Ah, sorry sorry. So you came along, Hzauki.”
“Yup!”
Yuuji looks rather happy as he pats Hazuki on the head. Don't let him fool you, Yuuji really like kids, so he must be happy when he saw Hazuki.
“Okay, it's time to change. I handed the girls changing room key to Shouko, and you girls go follow her. Once we're done, gather at the poolside.”
With Yuuji ordering, we split up into boys and girls. Himeji-san and Minami follow Kirishima-san; me and Muttsulini and Hazuki and Hideyoshi are following Yuuji—eh, that's not right.
“Really, Hazuki and Hideyoshi should go to the girls' bathing room. Why aren't you following Kirishima-san?”
I continue to nudge Hazuki and Hideyoshi who're behind us. In this moment, guys should be thinking of going into the girls' changing room, not the other way around.
“Hehehe, I'm just joking.”
“But I'm not joking at all...”
If we're to change clothes, Muttsulini will end up returning to sender before he can even see everyone in swimwear. He himself may be satisfied with just that, but I can't just let my friend die like that.
“Oi, stop playing around, hurry up and get over here, Hazuki, Kinoshita.”
“YOU, YOU TOO, SHIMADA? NOO!! I WON'T GO TO THE GIRLS' CHANGING ROOM TO CHANGE!!”
Hideyoshi stubbornly refuses to go to the girls' changing room.
But even if he's not willing, it'll be bad if we're in the guys' changing room...
“Erm...if that's the case, why don't we let Kinoshita-kun change in another place?”
Himeji-san timidly raised her hand. As expected of Himeji-san, to be able to think of such a good idea. Now nobody will complain.
“U, ugh...I can't explain it, but I'll let this pass for now...I'll just make everyone change their mindsets once you people see me in a swimsuit...”
Hideyoshi muttered as he clenches forcefully on the bag with a swimsuit in it. Ugh~hm, squared trunks...no matter what, I can't imagine Hideyoshi being compatible with that.
“Okay, since we decided, hurry up and take action, stop wasting time.”
“Hm, you're right.”
“...(Nods head).”
Thus we all head towards the changing rooms in 3 different directions.
—20 minutes later—
“The girls still haven't changed, huh?”
“Seems that way.”
“...(Nods head).”
Having changed into our squared trunks, we're standing near the pool, waiting anxiously for the girls to come out. The feeling is just like that of a festival, I'm feeling really excited.
“Muttsulini, you ready? This concerns your own life!”
“...No problems, I already practised all 236 styles yesterday.”
I really want to know what styles are there.
“...And I already identified 256 different styles of bleeding.”
“Doesn't that mean that you're guaranteed a 100% chance of dying?”
Seems like Muttsulini's dead no matter what happens.
“Oh, seems like somebody's here.”
Yuuji suddenly said. Turning back, a little figure is running towards us from the girls' changing room. That should be Hazuki-chan, right? Hmm, seeing an elementary school kid wear the deep blue swimsuit sure makes me—unable to smile at all!
“WHA WHA WHA WHA WHA WHA WHAT SHOULD WE DO!? THAT SHOULD BE A SCHOOL SWIMSUIT, RIGHT!?”
“...I want my lawyer (drip drip drip).”
“I say...you guys should calm down first. There's no need to get so excited over seeing an elementary school kid in a swimsuit.”
Yuuji calmly retorted.
Is, is that right? It's true that she's an elementary school kid, but we have no need to be so embarrassed. Calm down, hurry up and calm down. Look at her calmly before continuing.
“Onii-chans~ I kept you waiting!”
I calmly look at Hzauki-chan who's running at us. The large words 'Shimada' is sewn on the chest of her swimsuit, but that ample chest that doesn't suit an elementary school kid causes the word to be out of shape. And the limbs that aren't covered by the swimsuits are exposed under the sun, looking really healthy and eye-catching. This gal has unlimited potential.
Hmm, I see. Like what Yuuji said, if I think about this calmly, this isn't nothing big.
“Just 2 years of probation after all.”
“...I'll plead guilty even if I'm convicted (drip drip drp)”
“You two are only acting cool!”
But speaking of which, she doesn't look like Minami's little sister at all. That...what should I say, the part with the nametag on it and raised seems...
I hesitate on whether I should focus my eyes on that part that doesn't look like it fits an elementary school kid. At this moment, someone else comes running over from the girls' changing room.
“Dam, damn it, Hazuki! How can you take my thing away like that! Hurry up and return it to me!”
What appears in front of me is Minami, who for some reason is covering her chest with one hand. What's that?
“...Breasts pads.”
“Eh?”
I turn around to look at Muttsulini, who's muttering to himself, and sees Hazuki-chan's tummy inflate for some reason.
“Ah~ it dropped.”
Hazuki-chan reaches into her swimsuit and starts to look for something, and the bump at the tummy slowly moves towards the chest. Ahh, I see, so she stuffed breast pads into her swimsuit. No wonder, I was wondering how come an elementary school kid's breasts are so big.
“Hm! If so, what Minami wants back is the brea—”
“WATCH THIS, I'M BETTING EVERYTHING ON IT!”
“NO YOU CAN'T MINAMI! THAT ONE HIT CAN MAKE MY LOSE MY MEMORY OR EVEN ERASE MY EXISTENCE!!”
I seem to have found out something I shouldn't have found out.
“Uuu...I actually went all the way to prepare this...Hazuki, you big idiot.”
Minami muttered bitterly. I can't really tell since she's using her hand to cover her chest, but Minami should be wearing a 2-piece swimsuit. She does look like a beach volleyball player, so cool...
“Wha, what? Is it weird that I'm wearing this?”
Minami seems like she doesn't want to let others see her in a swimsuit as she curls up. Why doesn't she have any confidence in herself?
“It, it's not that at all! Well...I find that it suits you a lot!”
“Eh...Aki, are you serious?”
“Um, yeah...your limbs, chest and breasts are all slender, and I find them pretty. Your toes are stepping on mine—OW OW OWWW!!!”
“Didn't you just call me flat-chested twice?”
Those prideful eyes of Minami are raised several inches as she glares angrily at me. But the swimsuit Minami's wearing is really cute. Her face is already cute, and her sheep-like limbs are enough to make up for the lack of chest ampleness. And since she's so charming, it's not logical to not call her cute when she's wearing such a swimsuit.
Though I say this, since it's Minami, I'll likely be sent into heaven if I say it, so it's best to follow the gold rule of 'silence is golden' and keep quiet about it so that I won't suffer.
“Shimada, you don't really have to be so angry. Though Akihisa says this, he definitely minds about your look in this swimsuit.”
“Yu, Yuuji!? What are you saying!? I'm not...”
“Ah, is, is that so? Really, Aki, couldn't you be more honest about it...you idiot.”
Minami said that in a teeny-weeny voice. Really? Since you said so, I'll just honestly say what I wanted to say.
“Minami's chest is so small.”
“I'll wreck your eyes, left and right, equally.”
See? I'm about to be sent into heaven.
Just as we're admiring Minami and Hazuki-chan's swimsuits, the 3rd assassin walks over from the changing room.
The long black hair is swaying about as the person walks elegantly like a model. The body that's of high-class all around looks like she's unreal, causing me to almost forget to breathe. I stare at her every action—Kirishima Shouko-san really dazzles me.
She continues to look unperturbed as she reaches her hand out and pokes Yuuji's eyes.
“WAAAAHHHHHH!!! MY EYES! MY EEEEYYYYEEESSSS!!!”
“Woah! Even the act of poking Sakamoto in the eyes in so beautiful...”
“Hmm, to be able to see such a beautiful figure, it's worth sacrificing Yuuji's eyes...”
“THAT'S BECAUSE THE MISFORTUNE DIDN'T OCCUR ON YOU!!!”
I don't care what the heck Yuuji's shouting as I still focus on Kirishima-san.
“Wah...onee-chan's so pretty...”
Kirishima-san's wearing a slightly more mature looking white bikini and short skirt. These alone wouldn't be much, but couple d with her perfect face, crystal clear skin and silky long hair, it's better to describe her as 'elegant' instead of 'pretty'. Anyway, she's full of charm.
“...I'm really happy to hear you say that...”
Kirishima-san lowers her blushing face. THAT'S AGAINST THE RULES!
“Oi, Yuuji, you should have something you want to say to Kirishima-san, right?”
Though Kirishima-san must be really happy to hear us praise her like that, she should be really mindful about that person she likes, right? We got to let Yuuji praise her somehow.
I reach my hand out and wordlessly push Yuuji from behind.
“Shouko.”
“...Mm.”
“Get me a tissue, my tears can't stop flowing for some reason.”
“YUUJI YOU BIG IDIOT! YOU SHOULD HAVE SOMETHING ELSE YOU WANT TO SAY, RIGHT!?”
“I CAN'T EVEN SEE ANYTHING NOW! WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY!?”
This damned bastard doesn't understand a girl's feelings at all!
“Really, that Yuuji's useless, don't you say, Muttsulini?”
I turn to talk to Muttsulini, who's completely silent, probably because he's busy doing blood transfusion. However, Muttsulini didn't respond; instead, he's stoned in place as he stares at the other direction.
“Eh, what's wrong, Muttsulini?”
Stunned because he's surrounded by charming girls wearing swimsuits—this guy's response isn't normal at all. His response is too weird. What's going on?
“...Sorry, Akihisa.”
Muttsulini lets out a hoarse and barely audible voice as he continues to mutter while trying his best to breathe.
“Eh? Why?”
“...I'm...going...first...”
Muttsulini suddenly collapses with a large amount of bleeding.
“Mu, Muttsulini!?MUTTSULIN—”
DAMN IT, WHO DID THIS!? WHO CAUSED MUTTSULINI TO BECOME LIKE THIS?
I hurried over to carry Muttsulini, who collapsed onto the floor, and casually turn to look behind—
“So, sorry, it took me quite some time to tie the lace behind my back.”
There stood a biological weapon.
Not, NOT GOOD!
“TOO DANGEROUS!!!(PHOOSH)”
I quickly stabbed my eyes. Secret technique –self-poke into eyes!
“A, Aki? What are you doing?”
That was close...it I continued to look, I would most likely come close to death. The instant judgement saved me.
“Excuse me, but what's wrong with Akihisa-kun?”
“Ah, Mizuki, I don't really know what's going on, but Aki just stabbed himself in the eyes—”
All I can hear is that Minami seems to see something unbelievable as she gasped. Damn it! Did Minami follow Muttsulini's steps and collapsed?
“Minami?”
“Worauf fur einem Standard hat Gott jene unterschieden, die haben, und jene, die nicht haben!? Was war fur mich ungenugend!” (God! Why is the standard to decide what some people will have and what some people will never have in their lifetimes? What am I still imperfect in?”
I thought that Minami already got used to Japan, but it seems like her old habit of lapsing into German when she's confused hasn't changed at all.
“Uuu...at least my vision's recovering—”
“...Yuuji, you can't look (kuoosh).”
“GUUAAHH! NOT AGAIN!? WHY ME NOW!?”
“Wah, onee-chan's chest is so ample...”
With Yuuji's wail as the BGM, Hazuki-chan cried out in surprised. Even the normally stoic Kirishima-san's voice is trembling somewhat.
“Eve, everyone? What's wrong?”
The biological weapon herself doesn't seem to notice this as Himeji-san asks while looking puzzled.
“Hahaha, there's nothing wrong at all. Himeji-san, can you please wait a while?”
“Ah, okay...”
I repeatedly take a few deep breaths to allow myself to calm down. Okay, this will do.
After making my psychological preparations, I slowly widen my eyes. Hoho, if I can calm down and deal with it normally, a swimwear-clad Himeji-san isn't anything much.
“The weather today sure is great, Himeji-san! (GUAAHHH!!!)”
“Ah, Akihisa-kun? A lot of blood is spilling out of your nostrils!”
WHO IS IT! WHO'S THE GUY WHO SAID THAT 'THE BODY IS STILL HONEST'!
“Sorry, Himeji-san, please hold on for a while.”
“Oh, Okay. I don't know what's going on, but I'll wait.”
“Thanks. You really helped me out a lot here.”
I then lift my nose up and empty my mind...that's right, I did see Himeji-san's tender white skin, and it was really—
“Thi, this isn't good! Akihisa-kun will die of blood loss!”
The blood flow increase. How did this happen?
“Are you alright, baka onii-chan?”
“Ah, mm, thanks Hazuki-chan.”
That was a huge relief, Hazuki-chan passed me a piece of tissue. Now I can finally stop my nosebleed.
“Okay, again...”
For the third time, I stare at the swimwear-clad Himeji-san. My nose instantly became hot the moment her figure enters my eyes, but at least I finally managed to stop it.
“That...Akihisa-kun?”
“...”
I try to say something, but I could say anything.
Himeji-san figure enters my eyes, and that get-up of hers is too refreshing. She's wearing a pink bikini that reveals much of her large bust and a skirt on her waist. The normally pure and innocent looking Himeji-san has a 10 times 10 killing ability when she's in this swimwear now. Besides, that huge bust that doesn't match her petite body is really disasterous. I feel like I'm challenging a human's limits.
“I, is it strange for me to wear thi...”
Like Minami just now, Himeji-san curls herself up as she doesn't look very confident. Can't let this go on! I got to say something now!
“It, it's not strange at all! This swimwear fits you well!”
“Really?”
“Of course it's true! I can bet on a life!”
Actually, Muttsulini bet on his own life.
“This is good...my hard work in limiting my food intake finally paid off...”
Worked hard to limit food intake? No way, she still has such quality! What will happen to me if she's serious?”
“Mizuki, as expected, you're definitely my greatest opponent...you better remember this!”
Having finally recovered, Minami glares at Himeji-san's breasts like an enemy. If she has even 1/5 of Himeji-san's own, Minami would be like an ordinary person.
“Ugh...I still can't see...is everyone here?”
Rubbing his still-closed eyes in pain, Yuuji's still tearing as he asked us.
“Hideyoshi's not here yet.”
Hideyoshi had to go to the campus instead of the changing rooms, so he had to spend a longer time.”
“...Hideyoshi's wearing squared trunks...”
Finally managing to recover and replenish his blood, Muttsulini said with a somewhat lonely voice. Ya, I understand how unhappy he is. Hideyoshi looks so cute, so he should wear a swimsuit that suits him!”
“Baka onii-chan, why do you look so sad?”
Hazuki-chan looks worried as she asks me. She's really a good kid...
“Sorry for making you worried, Hazuki-chan. I'm just feeling a little lonely, you don't have to worry about it.”
“Hazuki, it's stupid to worry about Aki, you don't have to—”
Speaking halfway, Minami's suddenly speechless. What happened?
“Sorry for making everyone wait, took me quite some time to change, and there's quite the distance from the building to the pool...”
A familiar voice rings in my ears.
This voice and tone, Hideyoshi's finally here, so everyone's—
“sncfksurjkmxaoe,m(((Don't worry Hideyoshi, we weren't waiting for too long)”
“Calm down, Akihisa, this is planet Earth.”
Yuuji calmly retorted just as I'm all panicky now. But this is because he can't see anything now. Can he say that so calmly when he sees what's in front of him?
“How, how is it? Don't I look more manly now?”
Looking shy but trying to display the swimsuit, Hideyoshi came walking towards us.
“Wah, this onee-chan's so pretty!”
“Ugh, you're calling me pretty? Shimada imouto, I don't know what's wrong with you, but as you can see, I'm a guy!”
“Eh? But Hazuki feels that this is a girl's swimwear.”
“WHA, WHAT DID YOU SAY!?”
That's right, Hideyoshi's wearing a squared trunks swimsuit—but that's a girl's swimwear.
“Ki, Kinoshita...how long do you plan on obstructing us?”
“Kinoshita-kun's too despicable...actually using squared trunks to make us relax. You betrayed us in the end!”
Basically, Hideyoshi's wearing a sports swimwear that's similar to what Minami's wearing. The top's a short sleeveless tight vest, and the bottom's an ordinary pair of trunks. There's a pair of shorts added outside the swimming trunks, and the top button is unbuttoned. This is a squared trunks, though it's a girl's swimwear.
“Hideyoshi! You finally detected our feelings!”
“...I will salute this swimwear as payment for our everlasting friendship and lust.”
“It, it's not like that! I should have gotten a guy's swimwear! I even told the shop attendant that I wanted to buy 'an ordinary pair of squared trunks'!”
“I guess that attendant must have been mistaken..because Kinioshita-kun only said that he wants 'squared trunks'.”
“...Ya, I would have recommended the same thing.”
“How, how did it end up like this...no wonder I felt that it's strange; why would guys swimsuit have a vest on top...”
Hideyoshi collapsed onto the floor and clenches his fist and teeth as he said this. Even at this moment, I can only find it weird, it does fit Hideyoshi's personality after all. To the shop attendant we never met before, Good Job!
Just as we're discussing this, Kirishima-san looks worried as she says to Yuuji,
“...Yuuji, are your eyes alright?”
“Hm? Ahh, they're alright. I can more or less see. If you are worried about that, you shouldn't have done that right from the beginning, right—”
“...If so, here's another one (phoosh)”
“A, A THIRD TIME!? WHAT SORT OF HATRED DO YOU HAVE AGAINST ME!!?”
“...There're too many things here that Yuuji can't see.”
We're already at the pool, but the way things are going, Yuuji will end up in the hospital before he can even step foot into the water.
