Maria-sama ga Miteru:Volume22 Chapter5.3

Part 3.

As Sachiko waited for Rei to finish her cake with the spoon, she began playing the piano.

"Any requests?"

Sachiko turned to Rei and asked after she had finished skimming through her practice book.

"'Für Elise' please"

Rei answered as she spun the spoon around in her hand.

"When I meant piano, I was looking for a recital piece."

"Well I can't remember any others! Oh, I also know the Minute Waltz."

It would be great if Rei could have said something like Chopin's "Nocturne A" or Mozart's "March B", but Rei had lived most of her music untouched by classical music and thus was completely oblivious about these things.

"Fine, I'll do Für Elise."

Sachiko looked for the song in her book and stood the pages of sheet music up on the piano stand. Was it organized by numbers, or in alphabetical order by an author's last name, or were the piece names themselves in alphabetical order? All Rei knew was that Sachiko had simply taken the book of music out and thumbed quickly to the page, so she knew the book well.

Could Sachiko play every song in that book? If she could, then wow.

"And now, to fulfill the guest's request."

The familiar melody wafted over Rei. So that's why Sachiko had wanted a recital piece. She wanted something that sounded nice at a distance. The music was very soothing to Rei's ears.

To Rei it felt as if she were hearing some age-old recording from a CD. The song put Rei at ease.

Rei knew that the next moment she thought about Yoshino, the blood would rush into her face. But right now it was necessary for her to calm down. If she did then her thought process wouldn't feel so one-sided.

Every note that Sachiko pressed seemed to be hit at the right time, just the right way.

Could Rei call that a perfect session on Sachiko's part? And then could she attribute a quality of flawless beauty to it? Even the lulls were punctuated by the perfect notes or lack thereof. It was almost as if the music on the sheet was coming to life. Even without saying such grandiose words, Rei felt that she could convey the beauty of the performance to Sachiko with a simple expression of thanks.

This isn't how Shimako would look at the playing though. She too might consider that all the correct notes had been hit, but maybe she would have called the middle section too soft. Or maybe rather than commenting on how loud Sachiko had played, she might have thought that the song's sound felt too distant.

To a person that played music, it sounded different. If Rei could play like Sachiko, what would her performance have sounded like? Maybe she too would be considering the qualities of the music.

When Sachiko finished playing, she placed her hands on her knees. Sachiko finally got up when she decided that Rei's mood had cooled down significantly. Sachiko closed her book of sheet music and put the cover of the piano down. Had Sachiko been looking at Rei for an encore, Rei would have urged Sachiko to play two or three more times.

Sadly, Rei hadn't come for a concert. Rei let the music go.

When Sachiko sat back down next to Rei, Rei began talking once more.

"I won't be going to Lillian Girls' University."

"Huh?"

"I don't know if I can make it in time, but I'm applying for other schools."

"But didn't you fill out the escalator application?"

The day for filling out escalator applications had long passed. That day too Rei had been on the fence about where to go. So Rei had given the application just in case.

"On the last day of school, I'll tell the teachers that I won't be attending."

"I see."

Sachiko nodded slowly. She recognized that this was the real thing that Rei had come to talk about.

"Yoshino-chan..."

Did she know? Sachiko's eyes continued the question. But as soon as she could even think of the question, the question answered itself in Sachiko's mind. Yoshino knew, obviously.

There was no way Yoshino wouldn't know.

Yoshino always wanted to be the first to know anything about Rei.

But Rei shook her head.

"I haven't told Yoshino yet."

"Why?"

For years now, Rei had been telling everyone that she would be going to Lillian for college. So obviously Yoshino thought that Rei would be going to Lillian Girls' University.

"I'm afraid of her."

"Afraid?"

"Yes, afraid."

Rei answered so honestly that Sachiko laughed.

"Aren't you getting too worked up about this?"

It was a good thing that they were such good friends. Sachiko understood all of these things.

"Maybe I am. But I know Yoshino would look me straight in the eye and ask me "why". Then my resolve would break."

"What good is a resolve that isn't resolved?"

"I think I'm right about what would happen. Yoshino is important enough to me that if she really wanted me to change my mind, I would."

"I see."

"That's why before I tell Yoshino, I need to make sure my thoughts translate into actions. I want Yoshino to have no power over me when I tell her."

So she would tell Yoshino after she told everyone else.

"So you won't tell her that you submitted the escalator application either?"

Rei could not afford to show Yoshino that she was wavering. Rei had decided on a concrete path for her future life. And if they didn't have chances to talk with each other, then it would take longer for Yoshino to find out. That's how Rei wanted to keep Yoshino out of it.

"But does Yoshino have any right to get involved into which university you go to?"

Sachiko looked searchingly toward Rei's face as she asked.

"Maybe she does."

Rei said. Then suddenly she remembered something and said "No"

"I'll make sure Yoshino can't get involved with this."

Rei was definitely going to inform Yoshino some day of this. And everything Rei had done until now to keep Yoshino out of the way to plan what she would do with her life she had never done before. She had never kept Yoshino out of her life like this.

Plans for the future.

Rei remembered, and grimaced at the memories.

"You know. When I was a kid, I had thought that I'd become a nurse."

Rei had never told Sachiko about this before so she was certain that Sachiko would laugh. But Sachiko didn't.

"For Yoshino-chan?"

"Yeah."

For the little Yoshino who had to keep going back and forth to the hospital. She would even have to stay there a few times. When she saw Yoshino in pain, Rei was so touched that she wanted to become a nurse. Rei had felt that this was a message telling her what to do with her life. If she became a nurse, then she could be with Yoshino and be her strength. It felt weird but to Rei, Yoshino was the only real patient.

"The next thing I wanted to be was a doctor. I wanted to come up with some cure for Yoshino that didn't involve surgery. Because Yoshino had always been afraid of surgery."

"When I found out that Lillian University didn't teach Medicine, I was shocked. It was right before I entered high school. But if I had to go to a medical school instead of Lillian University, then I couldn't be with Yoshino, could I? So after two days of worrying, I finally decided. My first priority was to be close to Yoshino, and that after college I might go to med school."

Sachiko who had been quiet all the while smiled lightly. Rei too smiled. She continued talking.

"I was so sure of everything, right? I felt that if I kept my resolve strong toward this future, then all of it would be possible, even though I know that life wasn't all that predictable. But I had decided that the most important thing to me was to be with Yoshino. But."

Yoshino underwent the surgery on a whim, and then became fine. And then Rei didn't have to protect her anymore.

"Even though I was the one who had dedicated my life to being with Yoshino, I was the one left behind."

As Rei spoke her chest tightened.

Right. The pain from having realized that Yoshino had left her behind still hurt.

"I had grown up watching over her, and so when Yoshino didn't need me anymore I didn't know what to do. For me feeling needed was the most important feeling in my life. I had grown dependent on Yoshino. So I decided that I needed to slowly distance myself from her."

"That's why you wanted to go to some other school?"

Rei nodded.

"Yoshino and I are cousins. We live right next to each other. It's not that easy to shake her off. We even go to the same school."

"That might be, but still. Was Yoshino-chan the only reason you decided to go somewhere else?"

"It was. But I'm not running away. I'm looking ahead, not turning from what's behind. I'll be studying something that I couldn't here at Lillian."

"And what would that be?"

"Kinesiology."

With her upbringing from Kindergarten in the Lillian school system, she'd be going on to studying to teach kindergarteners kendo. Wasn't that an interesting take to life? Still she knew her choice was one she was making because she had been raised in the closed world of Lillian. Once she left Yoshino and her life here behind, she knew she'd be able to see a much wider world.

She felt at ease with Yoshino. But she was so overwhelmed by this feeling of ease that she was essentially becoming an actor in Yoshino's life, not hers.

Rei had spent the whole year thinking about her choice.

"But I'm weak and my resolve is never strong enough. I kept going back and forth between my choices until I finally chose to leave Lillian. I knew that if I went on this way, I'd lose to Yoshino. I felt like my eyes had been opened."

"Lose? To Yoshino-chan?"

"Yes."

Yoshino was planning to bring Nana along to the Rose Mansion for the Christmas party. Rei didn't know what sort of introduction Yoshino and Nana had planned, but Rei had no doubt that Yoshino was planning to introduce Nana formally to Rei.

"If I try to grow up after Yoshino leaves me behind, it would be even harder."

"... Rei."

Sachiko walked up to Rei.

"I think you've made a great decision."

Sachiko grabbed Rei's shoulders from behind.

"I'll think of you completely differently from now on Rei."

"So will I."

Rei began laughing. Suddenly, the doorbell rang indicating a visitor to the Ogasawara residence.

A sound that resembled Rei's alarm back at home, beckoning her to wake up.