Maria-sama ga Miteru:Volume8 Chapter8 4

Spring Breeze. Part 4

"Um, is it alright to leave them alone?"

I asked Rosa Foetida, who had exited the room alongside me.

"It's fine, don't worry. Trying to mediate would just make everything more complicated. Without an audience, they won't have to hold back, so they'll come to a resolution sooner."

"Ah…"

Even so, I still felt somewhat responsible since it looked like I was the cause of it. Rosa Gigantea blamed Rosa Chinensis for me being in the room.

"It's Shimako-san … right? I'll bet that surprised you."

"Yes … ah, no."

I hurriedly shook my head. But it looked like Rosa Foetida's expression didn't seem to be related to my response.

After leaving the Rose Mansion, we walked side-by-side down the corridor. As I'd become acquainted with the school building in the month since the entrance ceremony, I would have been fine without an escort, but Rosa Foetida stuck with me. Perhaps she was staying true to her words and leaving them, "without an audience." Only Rosa Chinensis and Rosa Gigantea remained on the second-floor of the Rose Mansion.

"You're quiet. Or is it because I'm a third-year?"

"I'm not much different even when I'm with my classmates … "

"Really?"

Rosa Foetida tilted her head in thought, the corners of her mouth creeping up just a little bit.

When the school building entrance came into view, I asked Rosa Foetida:

"What should I do?"

If we parted ways like this, I had an impending sense that I'd be trapped inside a labyrinth. I wasn't worried about getting lost at school, but it didn't look like I'd be able to find my way through the maze of people's emotions that were blending together.

"About what? The assistant thing? … Do whatever you want."

"Whatever I want."

"Ah, sorry. I'm not trying to throw you out. It's true that Youko … ah, Rosa Chinensis was trying to put you to work to help Rosa Gigantea, but that's not really relevant to you, is it? You're under no obligation, so you can come if you want to, or if you refuse, that's fine too."

"But."

"Will pulling out like this leave a bad aftertaste?"

"… I don't really know."

In the hallway just before the building entrance, we leaned against the wall, alongside each other.

As we talked, I started to understand. Rosa Foetida didn't seem to be as assertive about interfering with Rosa Gigantea as Rosa Chinensis. If pushed, I'd say she seemed to be watching on from a neutral position.

"Yoshino-chan told me that you're on one of the committees."

Rosa Foetida changed the topic, as though she was offering a palate cleanser.

"Yes."

"Which one?"

"The environmental care committee."

"– Fitting, very fitting."

Was Rosa Foetida laughing? Arms crossed across her chest, looking at the toe of her indoor shoes.

"Do you want to live in a paradise devoid of humans too?"

"Huh?"

"One of my friends is like that."

Looking out at the sky through the hallway window. At that moment, I remembered Rosa Gigantea. I didn't actually see her, but for a moment I felt like I saw a ghostly image of her in the cherry blossom blizzard, eyes closed, looking up at heaven.

"But setting aside Rosa Chinensis' expectations."

Rosa Foetida brushed back the hair gathered by her hairband.

"Are you unwilling to assist with the student council work, Shimako-san?"

"Not really."

I offered a weak denial. If I'd been asked, "Do you want to?" then I would have unequivocally answered, "No."

I thought Rosa Foetida would tell me, "If you're not unwilling, then you should agree to it." I was used to conversations flowing like that.

I've been trapped like that a number of times during my lifetime. Like being group leader, or class representative, or manager. Despite not remembering ever nominating myself, before I knew it, I'd been installed into a position of leadership. I could have refused if I'd been unwilling, but I wasn't unwilling enough to turn them down. How many times had I taken responsibility after looking at the people who were very obviously unwilling to do the job. Even though there was no way to measure a human's unwillingness.

"You should come and visit the Rose Mansion again, Shimako-san. We'll show you better hospitality, next time around."

"…"

Rosa Foetida looked at me impishly as I hesitated.

"It looks like you're having trouble deciding, and that's no good. Come and take a good look at us and make up your own mind. You can take all the time you need before you reply."

Rosa Foetida hadn't said that I should accept the offer. She'd consistently said that I should decide for myself. That may have been, in a sense, a more severe demand than forcing me into the role.

"But is it really alright that I delay my answer?"

"You can't calm down until you've decided between black and white then? You're way too serious."

Rosa Foetida smiled thinly, perhaps finding my suffering amusing.

"It's not that. If I visit the Rose Mansion while my status is still up in the air, my presence would be offensive to Rosa Gigantea."

"Maybe. But as long as you're at this school, there's a chance you'll run into her anywhere. You can't run away from that possibility."

"I can't …"

I thought that maybe she was right.

For better or worse, it was now too late to completely erase my involvement with the top echelon of the Yamayurikai. Even if my presence was offensive to Rosa Gigantea, there was nothing I could do about that. Naturally, I couldn't choose to erase myself from Lillian's for Rosa Gigantea's sake.

"I told you before, right? You don't have to think about Rosa Gigantea or anyone else. Just think about yourself."

"Just myself?"

I thought, "What should I do here?"

Even though it felt like the cherry blossoms in the blizzard that surrounded us when we first met were at long last being reunited with the ground.

"Right. Then it'll be fine. It doesn't have to be black or white. Because Rosa Gigantea herself is gray."

"Huh?"

"Up in the air."

Rosa Foetida whispered as she stroked my hair, as though sharing a secret.