Denpa Onna to Seishun Otoko:Volume8 Chapter3-B

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Chapter 3-B – Driven by Dreams and Hopes, Lying Beneath the Futon and Reality

Those who look only at reality “lack dreams”.

Those who chase only dreams “fail to see reality”.

And as for me, caught in a half-sleep, I let out a long yawn.

What greeted me the following morning was muscle soreness.

The insides of my thighs felt as though they were twitching like some other living creature.

“I haven’t been able to wake up at a normal hour lately.”

I tapped them a few times while grumbling, and I felt relieved when the pulsing finally settled. However, just as it calmed, a numbness spread outward, enveloping my legs. My lower body felt heavy. Pushing against the futon with my hands, I dragged myself along and dropped my legs to the floor. My heels hit the ground with a blunt, unceremonious thud. I took a single breath, and as I exhaled, I rose slowly. I visualised myself using even my very toes to lift my weight. If I ever had to explain to someone that I was sore from a game of tag, they’d laugh at me and say, “At your age?”

In truth, I found myself mocking my own situation. As I recalled the events of yesterday, I couldn’t help but laugh at various things.

“At least my waking was better today, since Smakin and the others didn’t wake me up.”

I descended the stairs, pressing my hand against the wall for support. I felt a sense of gloom, wondering if school was going to be just like this today. I wondered if Meme-san, Yashiro, and I were the only ones from yesterday’s group suffering from muscle aches. Ryuushi-san was likely fine, and Maekawa-san had only been walking. As for the Smakin duo, they seemed somehow unscathed.

When I reached the first floor and peeked into the living room, I saw a notice stuck to a familiar object.

The non-little Smakin was sprawled out in the living room. That part was a common sight in the Touwa family, but the notice was rare. Rubbing my sleepy eyes, I leaned in to see what it said.

“I’m studying. If you have business with me, please pet me.”

“…Pet her?”

I lightly tapped the side of the futon. It made a muffled thud, a sound that was quite far from “mofumofu”.

“Mofu?”

Erio’s face popped out. It was as if she were poking her head out from a turtle’s shell.

The hair at the top of her head, sticking up like bedhead, swayed gently like a field of grass.

“No, I don’t really have any particular business with you.”

“Mofu.”

She withdrew. She crossed her arms, agonised right there on the spot, and I tapped the futon once more.

“Hmph. I don’t have time to entertain you, Cousin.”

Her face popped out again, and she waved me away with her hand.

“Hmph.” It felt as though my daughter had entered her rebellious phase. That was the mood.

I found myself feeling a bit shocked.

“What kind of studying are you doing?”

“The kind required to become an astronaut.”

What poked out next was an English vocabulary book… Hey, that’s the one I use.

Return it before I go to school.

“It must be pitch black inside that futon. Can you even see?”

“Ta-daah, a flashlight!”

An emergency flashlight, kept by the entrance, was gripped in the right hand that emerged from the futon. There really wasn’t any need to go to such lengths just to study inside a futon. As I stood there feeling exasperated, Erio pulled her head back into the futon, as if to signal that the conversation was over, and returned to being Smakin. Thinking it was probably best not to disturb her studies, I moved away.

“That girl is really serious about this, isn’t she?”

Though it might just be that she had become difficult to get a hold of.

Last night, I had looked up a little bit about what one had to do to become an astronaut. I had no ulterior motive; I just found myself wondering about it. The primary requirements for Japanese astronaut candidates seemed to be proficiency in English, having worked for about three years after graduating from a science-related university, and possessing high communication skills. Broadly speaking, those three things were what was expected. Everything else depended on the specific role one would hold inside the rocket.

As of now, Erio certainly lacked every one of those qualities. I couldn’t say for sure regarding her English, but I knew the other two well. She had dropped out of high school, and her communication skills were well worth noting. Although she had become considerably more sensible, she was still far from being up to standard. Though, I did wonder what the actual standard for communication skills even was.

As I walked aimlessly down the hallway, I noticed that Meme-san’s room was becoming noisy. I wondered if it wasn’t just the person but even the room itself that had become loud. I hadn’t peered in there very often, but I decided to head over to at least offer Meme a greeting. Besides, if I, a mere highschooler, were to hurt my back or something only to find that a forty-year-old was perfectly fine, it would be quite discouraging, so I wanted to put my mind at ease early on.

When I peeked into the room, Meme-san was still lying on her futon. She was still in her pyjamas. And as if it were only natural, she sat facing a tiny television screen alongside Little Smakin. It was truly small, perhaps about eight inches. On the screen, which was restless with flickering lines, the original subject of the cosplay I had seen just the other day was displayed in a close-up. Yes, it was E.T.

…Looking at it now, it all seemed rather cheap.

I couldn’t view it with the same sense of freshness I had felt the first time. It wasn’t the remake, either, but the old version.

Furthermore, the medium being played was a videotape. It felt nostalgic; it had been a long time since I had seen one. By the time I was a child, most things had already transitioned to DVD. Inside that dim room, time belonged to the Showa era.

Incidentally, the mirror on the dressing table, which Meme-tan had crashed into during the summer, was still intact. The job of facing Meme-san every single day must have been quite difficult for it. It was worthy of sympathy.

“Ooooooh…”

Little Smakin expressed her admiration. Looking down, I saw several scraps of paper scattered across the floor, filled with impressions like “Oh!” or “Wooooah!” It was a lavish use of paper. I wondered if the self-proclaimed alien had been truly that moved by E.T. Ah, E.T. was flying. To be precise, he was pedalling through the air on a bicycle.

“Oooooooohhhhh…”

Little Smakin dropped to her knees and leaned forward, pressing close to the television screen. Smakin was clearly in a state of pure excitement. It seemed that every Smakin was incredibly moved by the moment of flight. I wondered why. Was there some universal sensitivity shared among aliens? I wondered why; was there some universal sensitivity shared among aliens?

To be precise, it brought back the pain of a broken bone and the boredom of the hospital. It nearly made me scowl.

“But…”

To think that the two of them were holding an E.T. viewing party so early in the morning. Perhaps responding to my voice, Meme-san turned only her head toward me. Her long hair swayed with a rustle, its shadow dancing in the dimly lit room, where the only other light came from the television. It was frightening.

“Hmm, a black shadow eyeing up Meme-tan’s underwear!”

“Your delusions of persecution are in peak form this morning. Good morning.”

While the movement of her lips and tongue was in peak condition, everything else lacked vitality. It seemed she was suffering from muscle soreness after all. I had heard that as you get older, it arrives a few days later, but it appeared Meme-san’s body was unexpectedly young.

Meanwhile, Little Smakin, who had leaned forward too far, collapsed face-down. She kicked her legs around, but she did not seem capable of standing up on her own. That had happened before.

“Cough, cough… Ah, Meme-tan’s body is being eroded by an illness. I cannot move.”

“I wonder at what age her brain stopped developing as well.”

“Because of this malady, I couldn’t prevent this child’s intrusion, ugh…”

She writhed, stretching her body as if to say she had been defeated. What was she even saying after we had held a movie night together? However, it seemed this Little Smakin had returned again. I was certain we had properly parted ways in the park.

Perhaps because of how she acted, it gave me a headache how much she seemed to belong in this house.

The vibe between you guys is kind of like family.

“Please pick me up.”

Someone who had collapsed and was unable to move was now calling for help. Since she was kicking her legs and kicking up dust if left alone, I reluctantly helped her up. And then, the revived Little Smakin began her high-speed ja-ja-ja-ja.

“Good morning, Kurokage-san!”

“Please stop acting like you’re a new member of Akakage. Also, try to act like you’re not here.”

It was as if she had already become a child of this household. She shouldn’t settle in so easily. Furthermore, Meme-tan showed absolutely no sign of having learned her lesson. I doubted anyone had believed that superficial apology of hers anyway.

After a uniquely long pause, Little Smakin crafted a new sentence.

“Shall we strike a daring pose or something?”

“That’s not what I meant. Don’t try to make a scene. You’ll just wrinkle the futon.”

She wasn’t being cute at all.

My thighs grew too tired to remain standing, so I sat down. Little Smakin, wrapped in a futon that seemed to have been washed since the dirt had vanished, turned her body back toward the television screen.

“From behind, it looks like you’re about to be sucked right into the screen.”

She wasn’t quite real. Her presence was something similar to, yet distinct from, Big Smakin.

Now, while the boy and E.T. enjoyed their elegant journey through the sky, over here was reality. The thing that lay prone.

Meme-san, who had slumped her face into her pillow as if bunching up her unnaturally soft cheeks, looked exactly like an oversleeping child. Her hair, scattered like indigo veins, was a mess of bedhead, and she was even rolling her eyes back.

The scene was such that it wouldn’t have been strange if a Tuesday night suspense drama had started at any moment.

“It looks like we shouldn’t expect much for breakfast.”

“Today’s Meme-tan is just not feeling it…”

“I’m usually no good at it, but as an adult…”

I ignored her, pretending to groan in frustration. That attitude was exactly what was wrong with me.

“I’ll just grab some bread or something for breakfast.”

“Aaaah, the master’s once-a-month special home-cooked meal! Make sure there’s some for Meme-tan, too!”

I decided to pretend I hadn’t heard any of it. I left Meme-san’s room and headed toward Erio.

“Hey, Erio, let’s eat.”

Smakin was still sprawled out in the living room. Moreover, there was no sign of her even intending to move. A flyer fluttered in the wind, catching my eye. Ah, right, how annoying, I thought as I began thumping the futon.

No matter how I thumped it, there was no way it would produce a soft mofumofu sound. It had substance, after all.

“Cousin, read the room!”

Erio, with her face and hands protruding like a turtle, puffed out her cheeks in a pout. She had really been getting quite prickly with me lately. Even though she clung to people’s backs whenever we went out, hiding behind them because she was so shy.

I wondered if there was something about my usual attitude that made her feel she could underhand me. Had I spoilt her too much?

“I said we should have breakfast.”

“Huh? Are you cooking, Cousin?”

“That’s how it’s going to be. Meme-san won’t move.”

I was about to say “I don’t mind if you do it”, but I swallowed the words. I couldn’t believe myself, what on earth was I planning to entrust to someone who didn’t even know how to use a toaster? Erio’s round eyes darted back and forth.

“But Cousin, you can’t cook.”

“Don’t be so sure. I can at least toast some bread. Come on, let’s go to the kitchen.”

“Hmm.”

Erio pulled her head back. Then, she began to roll, heading toward the floor. She was such a lazybones. She rolled energetically toward the kitchen, arriving while bumping into a wall along the way because she couldn’t quite bring herself to a full stop.

“Alright, alright, that’s enough, Smakin. Get out from under the futon and sit down.”

“Squelch…”

She wiggly crawled out from underneath the bottom of the futon. She scrambled about on all fours, moving all the way to her own chair. She pulled the chair out slightly from the table and sat down, pointedly showing off her crossed legs for some reason. Crossing her arms and straightening her back, she was, in her own way, trying to project an air of “grandeur”.

It didn’t suit her at all, and there was no dignity in it. It was like a hamster trying to imitate a tiger.

“Scrambled eggs and ham. And, uh, let’s see… an espri, espresso.”

She started placing an order. Aside from her attitude, it seemed like the first two items were something I could manage.

Yet, I wondered if that was the fruit of her studies. It made me want to cry, in more ways than one.

“Anyway, what even is an espresso?”

I heard the term often. As in “dawn espresso”. Erio tilted her head with a “Hmm,” and said,

“I don’t know.”

“Don’t order things you don’t know. I’m sorry, but we don’t serve espresso here.”

“You don’t? What a poorly stocked shop.”

“Don’t worry, today is the last day we’re even open.”

I certainly hoped so.

I opened the refrigerator and took out three eggs. I decided to make some for Meme-san as well, just in case. Then I looked for ham. I rummaged through the refrigerator, which was largely empty. There wasn’t any. In its place, I found some sausages. They were brand new.

“Will sausages work instead of ham?”

“Then, one sausage-coffee.”

I thought about making exactly what she wanted, but I restrained myself, fearing that if she complained about the result, it might end up founding a kingdom of stress. I silently tore open the bag of sausages. At this rate, it seemed my English proficiency wouldn’t be much to expect for the time being, either.

“Was the last time I cooked back in middle school?”

Aside from the occasional time when my working parents were busy in the morning, I had rarely ever held a frying pan. My legs began to go numb just from standing upright for a short while. To be honest, I wanted to be sleeping too.

“At least prepare the plates.”

As I lit the stove, I gave Erio her instructions. Setting the plates out was a reasonable request for a child like her.

Erio nodded with an “Mm” and stood up, scurrying around the kitchen… Hmm. It wasn’t as if her legs were short, nor was there much distance to cover in the narrow kitchen, yet for some reason, she gave the impression of running with all her might. Her legs didn’t look like they were suffering from any muscle soreness, though. I narrowed my eyes and continued frying the sausages, thinking how envious I was.

After that, I finished preparing the meal and took my seat. I had prepared a portion for Meme-san as well, but there was no sign of her appearing in the kitchen. Well, I figured she would show up eventually if I just left her be. With that decided, I began to eat.

“This is my home cooking, so you’d better eat it with gratitude.”

When I said that jokingly, she gave me a roundabout rejection, saying, “There’s no espresso.” Shut up and just drink your milk.

As I spread butter on my bread, I suddenly turned to Erio and asked.

“Hey, Erio.”

“Hm?”

“Since you’re aiming to become an astronaut, do you intend to return to high school?”

I didn’t know if it would be easy to return after quitting. Erio cast her eyes down, hiding her mouth behind her bread.

“I-It’s uncertain.”

“…I see.”

I couldn’t tell which way she was leaning, so my response remained vague.

It felt like the relationship between a father and daughter whose conversation had run dry. It was a bit awkward.

I finished spreading the butter. Perhaps I had used too much; a clump of butter remained in the centre.

“Well, I guess there are things like the daiken? But if you want to improve your social skills, going to school might be the quickest way.”

After all, a school was a melting pot of human relationships. It was the perfect place to learn about personal boundaries. It was the perfect place to learn about personal boundaries. It also served as practice for eventually “forgetting” those things. However, the atmosphere was not one suited for a long-winded lecture on such matters. I wanted to bring up another topic to change the subject, but that was the only thing that came to mind.

“Ah, was it fun to play tag?”

“Tokkun is nothing but pain and hardship; there’s no way it could be fun.”

She spoke as if wondering what on earth I was talking about. Despite that, her expression was relaxed, so she must have enjoyed it in her own way. According to what she said, she had always had few friends.

I wondered if she simply hadn’t had much experience participating in games like tag. It was unexpectedly pitiful.

“Is Mako-kun-kun doing well?”

“He reached level 30.”

Whoa, was that… strong? At the very least, Mako-kun-kun seemed to have reached a higher level than me.

Erio gnawed on a crust of bread. As she chewed rhythmically, she once again started acting like “Erio-san”.

“Cousin, your baking is amateurish. You lack sufficient training.”

I was being criticised by someone who couldn’t even use a toaster by herself. Before I could even feel insulted, I found myself laughing.

“I didn’t bake it myself, so I don’t think there’s any training involved.”

“The ones Mum bakes are tastier.”

“That’s just your mother-complex-driven bias… oh.”

Little Smakin came trotting up with quick, pattering steps. Humming a soft “mofuufu”, she prepared a cup and used her toes to open the refrigerator, pulling out a glass bottle of chilled barley tea. After setting the cup and the bottle on the table, she closed the refrigerator. Then, she sat down in the chair that Meme-san usually used and poured the tea into the cup. She thrust the cup straight into the futon and began gulping it down, the sound of her swallowing audible.

“Phew…”

“Wait a second.”

I tried to grab the edge of her futon. But it slipped right through my fingers as she pulled away. She moved toward the corner of the wall, keeping her guard up. While I was at it, I pulled the empty cup out from under the futon. I wondered if the inside of the bedding had got wet. At this point, words like dexterous simply failed to describe her.

“What?”

“No, nothing. It was just so natural; I couldn’t help it.”

I was far too preoccupied with someone else’s refrigerator. Even as I thought that she should probably be kicked out instead of being allowed to get so comfortable, there was an underlying feeling that prevented me from actually saying it. I had become far too accustomed to the atmosphere of this house as well.

“Well, whatever. How is Meme-san?”

“Zzz and snooore…”

“Go wake her up and bring her here. You can even trip her on your way back.”

“Leave it to me.”

With a quick scuttle, Little Smakin departed, as if kicking off the chair. She was certainly obedient.

If only her eccentric side could be improved, she would likely become an elementary schooler beloved by everyone.

“Uhhgh.”

Erio groaned resentfully while rolling a sausage around with the tip of her chopsticks. What was it now?

“What, do you want to complain that the cooking is underdone this time? You damn critic from the Gourmet Club!”

“No. Cousin and Mum, you’re always only focusing on that kid.”

“Huh? That’s not really true, is it?”

“It is. Look, she’s being so cheeky.”

She raised her arm and protested. Ah, so that was it.

I teased her because her sulky face looked so funny.

“Don’t be jealous. You’re such a child.”

“I-I’m not jealous!”

She stuffed a sausage into her mouth and began chewing quickly. Then, as if the juice had splattered inside her mouth, she rolled her eyes and let out an “Ouch!” While pressing her hand against her mouth, she stared at me with teary eyes, letting out a small whimper.

I felt my muscles relax, and my loosened expression naturally broke into a smile.

“I really think it’s more work just dealing with you.”

I meant it in the sense that she was a handful. I picked an ice cube from the refrigerator and popped it into her mouth.

“Whoa!” Erio pursed her lips, closing her eyes at the sudden cold.

Almost at the same time, a muffled scream of “Mofeeeeeeee” drifted in from far away.

Most likely, she had once again provoked the wrath of “the old lady”.

Perhaps that lack of ability to learn was the reason she remained wrapped in her futon for so long.

When I stepped outside with my bag, Little Smakin followed me for some reason. Perhaps as a result of nearly having her neck twisted off by the old lady, she stumbled along with unsteady feet, looking quite haggard. She had it coming, though.

As I slid my heel back into my shoe, I twisted my upper body around to face her.

“Are you insisting that elementary school is closed again today?”

“It exploded.”

“I see, I see. So it wasn’t the school you had business with, but the police.”

Ah, bending my knees was painful. It was because of the muscle aches. I walked away from the tiny terrorist and headed toward the barn. Little Smakin followed behind me. I didn’t want to admit it, but she seemed to be clinging to me for some reason. Erio, Yashiro, Little Smakin. Why did all these alien-type creatures insist on following me around? What exactly did I ever do to them?

I stepped out of the shed, and as the little one began to loop around me, I cut her off with a “Listen.” Little Smakin looked up with a “Mofufu” giggle. I felt a gaze full of expectation, but I ignored her and rejected it.

“I’m heading to school now, so I’m not joining you for any special training.”

“Ah, you don’t need to worry about the tokkun anymore.”

“Huh?”

Was she really just going to give up that easily? Was she really just going to give up that easily?

Or did she have some other motive? …Ah, come to think of it.

Yesterday, she had been talking about some new setting. I had mostly tuned it out, though.

“More importantly, it’s the bicycle! The bicycle! It’s incredible! It can fly!”

A bicycle? E.T.? More importantly.

“Your personality has completely changed.”

Ignoring my remark, she jumped right into the bicycle basket. Furthermore, the sound of her footsteps had evolved from a light pitter-patter. It had a heavier momentum. Yet she still carried a subtle air of silliness. Having settled herself neatly against my rear, she swung her legs upward and commanded me to be the driver.

“It’s Mach Go-Go!”

“You are definitely an Earthling.”

“A friend from Earth taught me.”

“You just arrived on Earth, and you already have friends? Wow, impressive.”

“Fufufu, that friend is you.”

“…When did I ever teach you anything?”

Tired of dealing with her and feeling the pressure of the time, I straddled the saddle again. Sensing the impact, Little Smakin began bouncing wildly with a clattering noise. God, how annoying. I pushed down hard on the pedals.

“I don’t think it’ll help, but I’ll listen. Where is your house? I’ll give you a ride.”

“It is in a far-off place in space.”

“…I thought so.”

I had already given up. I simply began pedalling toward the high school. Without even considering what to do about the situation.

When I lifted my gaze just a little, a deep azure sky stretched out as if the clouds had evaporated. There were power lines crossing the view and the red roofs of nearby houses. The world was in full colour. Yet, when I looked straight ahead, all I could see was pure white. The sunlight was intense, and the interior must have been incredibly sweltering. Though, I felt absolutely no sympathy for them.

“It’s slower than the Salamander.”

“That’s because its driver isn’t human.”

Don’t compare me to that. By the way, that non-human entity had been rolling around in the hallway after finishing breakfast. She had declared, “Once I’m full, it’s nap time,” but one way or another, she would likely head off to work after a while. She was someone Erio had been dealing with, after all. And that Erio was working at the shop today as well.

Besides, my English vocabulary book was snatched away as well… I didn’t use it much anyway, so I suppose it didn’t matter.

If this helped fulfil her dream, I could hold my head high as Erio’s mentor.

Even to me, it seemed such a petty motivation.

“Because you stoked the flames, my cousin has started saying she wants to become an astronaut.”

“Heh heh heh, exactly as I planned.”

“I don’t even know what plan you’re talking about.”

I turned right at the corner with a wry smile. As I stepped out onto the street, a group of middle school students, who weren’t permitted to commute by bicycle, came walking toward me like obstacles. It was disheartening to see boys and girls holding hands on their way to school first thing in the morning, completely oblivious to their surroundings. It was equally disheartening when their gazes all turned toward me and the contents of my bicycle basket at once. I wished I were either blind to my surroundings or an invisible person.

“Oh my, you look quite disheartened.”

“If you have that much perceptiveness, then try looking at your own reality for once.”

“I hope it flies soon. Is it not ready yet?”

“No, it’s never going to fly.”

Had she really hopped into my basket expecting a flying bicycle? That was an impossible demand.

Bicycles on Earth always, and I mean always, just stay on the ground. Sorry to break it to you.

I was used to eyes gathering on the contents of my basket, so as the journey progressed and a certain amount of time passed, I stopped caring. If anything, I showed it off. No, that would be a lie. But I stopped minding.

I arrived in front of the school gates without any further incident and pulled the brake. The brakes were a bit weak again, causing me to stop at a position slightly offset from the gate. I thought perhaps I should have them inspected sometime.

That aside, I let out a grunt and unloaded Little Smakin as if she were a piece of luggage. Even with the futon, she was light. Her weight felt like barely half of Erio’s.

Little Smakin twisted her body to the right, looking as if she were truly bewildered.

Other students, being drawn toward the school gate as if by a vacuum, looked back at us at least once, but I turned my back to those gazes and let them pass. Being the subject of rumors no longer bothered me much.

“We haven’t even taken off yet!”

“Well, we’ve already arrived at school. So, that’s that.”

I waved goodbye. I wondered for a moment if she might follow me, but there were no footsteps. Without any hindrance, I headed toward the bicycle parking area… I looked back halfway there. She was still standing in the same spot. I moved forward. I turned around. She was standing there. I turned around. “Help me.” I found that I didn’t really care much anymore.

But I looked back once more. She hadn’t moved an inch.

“…Ugh, seriously.”

I turned back. I tried ringing the bell for no reason. As if rejoicing at the sound, and as if she had been waiting for it, Little Smakin thrust her two arms forward with incredible speed.

“Space Ninpou: Pity-Seeking Technique!”

“What is this Space Ninpou nonsense… Oh, wait, I think space ninjas actually exist.”

“We are comrades!”

“Why must you unfold your grand schemes so recklessly?”

I realised I couldn’t bring myself to completely ignore someone like this. It was difficult not to act like a good person. “Look, it’s just because I’m such a helpful guy with a good heart,” I muttered, offering a hollow self-compliment as my shoulders slumped. My bangs had grown long; I wanted to cut them.

“Anyway, what is it you want from me?”

“Let’s fly through the sky together!”

She invited me with a tone so light-hearted it felt as though a musical trill might follow her words.

“…That’s a cruel joke, young lady.”

Leaning against the handlebars of my bicycle, a dry, hollow laugh, “ha ha ha”, escaped my lips.

Once, there had been a girl who invited me to fly through the sky together.

Now, in a complete reversal, I was being invited to fly. By a strange, tiny Futonese.

“This Smakin is being quite aggressive, isn’t she? Give me a break.”

“Now, now, just think of it as helping someone in need.”

“Listen… you need to dress like a human being, or at least…”

Perhaps I needed to be firm with her just this once. I cleared my throat, readying myself.

Then, raising my voice to lecture that marshmallow-like creature, I said:

“Listen to me. Bicycles do not fly. I will concede that wrapping yourself in a futon is one thing. But do not try to put dangerous things into practice based on your delusions. Truly, making your family grieve is not okay.”

Even Meme-san, though she was like that in the end, must have been in despair when Erio went missing or became delusional. Judging by how much she doted on her, one could only imagine how much of a shock it must have been.

“My family is grieving, so I want to go home as soon as possible.”

“You’re right; you should go home and then go to school. Bye-bye,” I said, waving my hand. It felt like a good place to stop, so I decided to part ways with her right there.

She seemed to have grown tired of her dream of becoming an astronaut, and eventually, she would likely grow tired of Smakin, too. That was how a young girl grew up. Yes, that felt like a good conclusion. It should be fine to end it here.

“You’re an ogre, a demon.”

“As far as I’m concerned, you’re the little devil.”

“A little devil, huh? Hehehe.”

She wriggled her body around. She was being energetically creepy. Moreover, I hadn’t actually even said goodbye.

“…Well, let me ask you one thing: how exactly are you supposed to fly on a granny bike like this one?”

“In any case, I think if you just keep running, you’ll eventually fly.”

“Am I the only one who feels there is absolutely no context to that sentence?”

“Truth is a shame.”

There was no way that was true.

“I misspoke. I meant it truly is a shame.”

Shut up.

While I was busy dealing with her, a chime rang out from behind us. Drawn by that somewhat overbearing sound, I saw bicycles rushing in frantically and boys bolting from their parking spots. I had to join them. But however… “…” I tried backing the bicycle up fifty centimetres.

Little Smakin did not move from that spot. She lacked even the slightest movement to the left or right, as if she might be gold-plated and turned into a statue right then and there. I took another fifty centimetres of distance. The person who had claimed not to be able to sit still had lost all movement, as if her very essence had vanished. I looked away. She was gone. I looked back. She was there.

“…………………………………………..That’s foul play.”

The chime finished ringing. The air, which had been trembling in fear of the sound, settled back into its usual stillness.

As if responding to my surrender, the bicycle wheels rolled forward with a rhythmic clatter.

“…Fine, I give up. I lost. You can stop with that whatever-it-is technique now.”

Once I admitted defeat, a triumphant, fanfare-like sound erupted from inside the futon.

“Space Ninpou: Pity-Seeking Technique!”

“It worked perfectly, damn it.”

Was I a fool for being unable to abandon something like this?

Yes, I was surely just an idiot who was terrible at calculating costs and benefits.

It felt pathetic, the way I felt compelled to look after even something of this sort.

Ah, enough of this. I’m skipping.

Goodbye, school.

Sometimes, it was good to follow my aunt’s example.

“Come on, get in the basket quickly. We’re heading back before a teacher spots us.”

When I beckoned desperately, it began to hop around. It seemed as though it had been holding back its movement until now, for it bounced around with unusual intensity. “Dammit, just get on already,” I muttered, reaching out to grab it, but it cleanly dodged my hand and leaped onto me as if jumping on its own two feet. As the creature hopped around in high spirits with a “moffuffu,” I spoke to it.

“I’ll run for you, anyway. But I’m telling you right now, neither you nor I are flying.”

It was a slip of the tongue; I’d meant to say I couldn’t fly, but as I’d already finished speaking, I didn’t correct myself.

“It’s fine. Since I am carrying an alien, I am sure we can fly.”

“Hah, hahaha. The last time I carried a self-proclaimed alien, we had a rather spectacular fall.”

“That was because you were too accustomed to Earth and lacked sufficient power. In that regard, I am brimming with vitality.”

As if to show off her freshness, she kicked her pale, bare leg up toward the sky. There was absolutely no allure to it; the leg looked much like a boy’s. Since it was in my way, I gave it a light tap to make her pull it back.

“My power decreases when I am influenced by Earthlings, so please refrain from touching me so casually.”

“Your personality settings really change constantly, don’t they?”

I didn’t go so far as to tell her she should follow Yashiro’s example, since Yashiro was at least consistent. That girl’s situation was much more severe.

“That is because I am an extremely delicate being.”

“That’s not what that means.”

“Out of paper. Please refill.”

That was perfect; I would keep her quiet for a while.

Sighing repeatedly, I pushed the bicycle forward, onwards.

I began to ride, turning my back on the town and the school.

Horizontally, parallel to the sky.

And so, I ended up skipping school to keep Little Smakin company.

It was a secret that my heart was dancing just a little bit.

After all, it felt as though my Youth Points were making a long-awaited comeback.

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• Getting teased relentlessly by Little Smakin: −3
• Skipping school to head out into town: +3

Current Total Youth Points: −1

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