Heijou Unten Chapter 6
Long, long ago, on a certain planet (Earth), humanity prospered. And then, it declined.
The rise☆and fall of life♪[1]
Now ruling Earth in humanity's place are cute little fairies. I’m the person whose job is to act as a mediator between these fairies and humans.
“Oh my, what brings you to a place like this?”
One day, while walking through the woods, I came across a fairy. The fairies are a new type of species, measuring at about 10 centimeters tall. Even though they're small, they were still amazing. Sometimes, they made magical tools.
“Human, I have something nice for you. Do you want it?”
“Sure, I'll take it.”
“Here, the Bug Cap!”
The fairy pulled out a hat shaped like a golden, scarab beetle.
“If you put this on, you’ll be treated just like a bug—ignored by everyone around you.”
“How convenient!”
I was instantly captivated by its charm. Putting on the Bug Cap, I immediately headed to the village and attempted to break into the house where my friend Y lived.
“Die, you filthy bug!!!”
“Kyaaaaaaaa!”
My friend came at me with a hammer, her face twisted in a demonic expression. It was true murderous intent.
“A giant bug!!!” “So gross!!!” “Kill it! Rip it apart!”
The passersby continued to attack and pursue me on the street where I had escaped to.
“Hyah-ha! This one’s a rare bug!” “I have to collect it!” “A specimen!”
I was chased around by vicious kids with a Bug Attribute (they perform triple damage against bugs).
“Buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz!”
Then, a disturbingly huge drone beetle (a terrifying ten centimeters) tried to propose to me.
“Cock-a-doodle-doo!”
And to top it all off, I nearly got eaten by a chicken.
While wearing the Bug Cap, you're recognized as an insect by others, but whether they ignore you or not depends on the person.
Well, that makes sense… I learned how even typically kind people change when faced with bugs. Perhaps that was their true nature all along. This fairy goodie was far too dangerous.
“…This is now banned.”
“Ehh—”
Humanity, today as always, continues its glorious decline.
Author's Notes[edit]
- ↑ The original line is えーこ☆せーすい♪, which would look like this 「栄枯盛衰」 or 「えいこせいすい」 without the emoticons. The phrase means the "ups and downs of life" or "vicissitudes of fortune".