My youth romantic comedy is wrong as I expected v7.5 S.S. 4
Short Story 4: Even so, Hikigaya Hachiman’s positive thinking is twisted.[edit]
We transitioned into the season where the refreshing winds, rather, the winds that were occasionally cold blew by.
“Chiba Prefecture Problem Consultation Maaails…”
When I announced the title as weakly as the rustling of the autumn winds, Yuigahama clapped her hands. But when Yukinoshita sent a dubious stare, those claps died down.
Yuigahama opened the tray of received mails as if to start things from anew and started off with the first mail.
“Umm, today’s first correspondence is from a resident of Chiba, Pen Name: Master Swordsman Shogun-san.”
<Pen Name: Master Swordsman Shogun-san’s Worry>
[The deadline of the industry’s leader draws near. An infallible method, with haste.]'
…This guy was sending way too many mails. It was the same scariness that you’d get when a bot on Twitter was adamant on making conversation with you.
“What’s this?”
Yuigahama who read the mail tilted her head and Yukinoshita called my name with a sigh.
“Hikigaya-kun.”
“You don’t need to tell me, I got it.”
It was something like this; now that you made it this far, grandpa was starting to feel like taking care of you now. It’s okay, I’ll accompany you until the very end... With my mind reaching a state of kindness, or rather, enlightenment, I typed the mail.
<The Service Club’s Answer>
[Things like the industry’s leader and whatnot, don’t be so selfish . Let’s just settle for GaGaGa Bunko. Don’t worry, it’s about the level of Shoggakan, okay? Furthermore, trend has it that GaGaGa writers can’t get married with voice actresses.]'
“So that’s one case done. Yuigahama-san, please read the next one.”
Yukinoshita didn’t do anything, yet she had a satisfied expression as she urged her to go on. Not finding that strange at all, Yuigahama began reading the next mail.
“Ummm, this is the next correspondence. From a resident of Chiba, Pen Name: Onii-chan’s Little Sister-san.”
<Pen Name: Onii-chan’s Little Sister’s Worry>
[Lately, I think because it’s gotten cold that our cat keeps going inside of our futon and forces me to be his arm pillow. I’ve yet to do it for onii-chan too! (That just now was high in Komachi points). I can’t turn over and the “fusuu” breathing in Komachi’s ears bothers me. Is there a good way to handle this?]'
After the letter was read, Yukinoshita and Yuigahama looked at me with odd, lukewarm stares.
“So it says, onii-chan.”
“There you go, onii-chan.”
“Shaddup, don’t call me onii-chan.”
The one who could call me onii-chan was Komachi and only Komachi. Keep calling me “onii-chan, onii-chan” and Chanko Dining might just start up.
“…By the way, d-do cats really, um, sleep together with you? A-Arm pillow?”
Yukinoshita was somehow embarrassed as she glanced back and forth at me with upturned eyes. That gesture of hers was rather sweet, but the way she was squeezing her fists with all her strength made her not cute at all.
“No, whenever the cat’s with me, he just goes straight on top of my stomach.”
When I said that, Yuigahama made a mocking smile.
“Isn’t he like toootally looking down on you? Kamakura totally thinks Hikki is below him for sure.”
“Don’t put him on the same level as your dog.”
“Cats fundamentally live their lives in isolation, so they don’t rank others as they would in a pack. There are cases where they do form packs, but in this situation, it seems closer to a relationship between a parent and child. That’s why he might be treating Komachi-san as a mother cat.”
Not only was she gallantly analyzing the situation, she was getting super chatty… Both Yuigahama and I shrank back along the way.
“Yukipedia-san sure knows everything, huh…?”
“Could you stop calling me that?”
Yukinoshita glared at me with an indignant face. It looked like she didn’t know everything like a certain pedia out there. Well, if she didn’t like being called that, then I had better revise it.
“Sorry. Catpedia-san.”
“It’s fine if you understand.”
“You’re okay with being called that instead!?”
Seemingly okay with that, in disregard to Yuigahama’s surprise, Yukinoshita was nodding her head in content.
Because of Yukinoshita’s lecture, I gained a considerable understanding of cats.
“…So basically, in my case, being spoiled by my overflowing, house-husband aura causes him to get on top of my stomach.”
Go me. Even the cats recognized my nature as a house-husband. In the future, I feel that I want to live a life like that of a cat’s.
But needing to destroy that ambition, Yukinoshita made a sudden, cold smile.
“But getting on top of your stomach could also be said to be the feelings of a parent cat towards its kittens, don’t you think?”
“Then he’s just being treated like a child.”
“…Phew, it looks like my desire-to-be-raised aura was making him do it, eh?”
I was even causing cats to want to bring me up. Amazing.
“Just how positive is your thinking!?”
“If you’re going to go that far, that resembles more like a maniac train of thought than positive thinking… Well, it might be better to learn from that as well.”
After saying that, Yukinoshita began typing a mail in response.
<The Service Club’s Answer>
[Since you get the chance to sleep with a cat, you should at least put up with that much.]'
Just get a cat already.
Translation Notes[edit]
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