Clannad VN:SEEN3512
Text
// Resources for SEEN3512.TXT
#character 'Voice'
#character '＊Ｂ'
#character 'Ryou'
#character 'Ramen Clerk' '
<0000>
// May 12 (Monday)
<0001>
// My chest's been feeling like crap, rolling around and around...
<0002>
// It's like my blood vessels melted away like molten iron...
<0003>
// Going back and forth... between the hardening hot and cold feelings-- but my body didn't actually feel that...
<0004>
// I just hated myself...
<0005>
// Yesterday...
<0006>
// Kyou's face was burned into the back of my eyes, not able to go away.
<0007>
// Anytime I close my eyes, or even blink them, she comes back...
<0008>
// ---\m{B}...
<0009>
// I was seen...
<0010>
// Kissing with Fujibayashi... Ryou...
<0011>
// We were going out, so something like that shouldn't be strange...
<0012>
// I shouldn't be feeling guilty about this at all.
<0013>
// Rather... that this should be normal...
<0014>
// We were... only just seen like that...
<0015>
// --\m{B}... un...
<0016>
// Just seen like that...
<0017>
// But...
<0018>
// Kyou's face... her expression stabbed into my chest...
<0019>
// ... the small hole left behind began to widen...
<0020>
// This dull pain, accompanied with heat, became heavy... heavy until it covered my entire body...
<0021>
// \{Voice} "\m{B}-kun!"
<0022>
// \{\m{B}} "... Eh?"
<0023>
// \{Ryou} "What are you doing, staring like that...?"
<0024>
// \{\m{B}} "Ah... s-sorry..."
<0025>
// \{Ryou} "Maybe you're not feeling too well...?"
<0026>
// \{\m{B}} "No, not at all."
<0027>
// \{\m{B}} "So... Fujibayashi, where should we..."
<0028>
// \{Ryou} "........."
<0029>
// \{\m{B}} "Ah... um... Ryou, where should we go?"
<0030>
// \{Ryou} "Hmm, there's a ramen stand not too far away that serves delicious food."
<0031>
// \{\m{B}} "... Ramen? You want to go there, even though it's boring?"
<0032>
// \{Ryou} "I thought you might like to try it... maybe you have a better idea?"
<0033>
// \{Ryou} "Or, maybe you don't like ramen...?"
<0034>
// \{\m{B}} "Nah, ramen's fine. Or rather, I like ramen."
<0035>
// \{Ryou} "I'm glad. The flavor will definitely be amazing."
<0036>
// Her smile...
<0037>
// Ryou's-- smile...
<0038>
// The day before yesterday, we promised to go on a date.
<0039>
// We didn't really decide on where to go.
<0040>
// We just planned on being together...
<0041>
// Lining up, we talk about random things to pass the time...
<0042>
// But, she was happy as we did that.
<0043>
// \{\m{B}} "... By the way, what ramen is this?"
<0044>
// \{Ryou} "It's a shio tonkotsu."
<0045>
// \{Ramen Clerk} "Thanks a bunch~"
<0046>
// \{\m{B}} "Whew, that was quite a lot."
<0047>
// \{Ryou} "Indeed. I'm quite full."
<0048>
// \{\m{B}} "You go to this stand often?"
<0049>
// \{Ryou} "I don't actually come here that much, but once in a while I come with my sister."
<0050>
// \{\m{B}} "... With Kyou?"
<0051>
// \{Ryou} "Yes. My sister really likes the gyoza here."
<0052>
// \{\m{B}} "Are they good?"
<0053>
// \{Ryou} "There's plenty of garlic."
<0054>
// \{\m{B}} "That's certainly good.
<0055>
// \{Ryou} "But... um... during that date... I wanted to hold back a bit..."*
<0056>
// \{\m{B}} "Hmm...? Oh, r-really?"
<0057>
// \{Ryou} "Y... yes..."
<0058>
// She's probably... worried about the time we kissed--... probably...
<0059>
// \{Ryou} "Ah, my sister puts a lot of pepper into the ramen from that stand."
<0060>
// \{Ryou} "By the time we're finished eating, the colour of my soup would look different from hers."
<0061>
// \{\m{B}} "She doesn't really care about her own body, does she..."
<0062>
// \{Ryou} "If you don't empty the bowl, it'll be a bit rude to the ramen stand."
<0063>
// \{Ryou} "You have to at least finish it all."
<0064>
// \{\m{B}} "Indeed..."
<0065>
// \{Ryou} "By the way, \m{B}-kun, what should we do now?"
<0066>
// \{\m{B}} "Hmm? I guess.. you have any places in mind?"
<0067>
// \{Ryou} "If I'm with you, \m{B}-kun, anywhere's fine."
<0068>
// \{\m{B}} "Then, somewhere where no one's around."
<0069>
// \{Ryou} "Eh...?"
<0070>
// \{Ryou} "Ah... uu.. uh, umm... where... no... one's... around?"
<0071>
// \{\m{B}} "I'm a guy, see."
<0072>
// \{Ryou} "U-umm... that's... um... uh... ummm... umm..."
<0073>
// \{Ryou} "Y... you want to... do it...?"です…か？」
<0074>
// \{\m{B}} "If you're no good, I'd be in a bit of trouble, you know?"
<0075>
// \{Ryou} "Ah... uu... umm... i-is that so... um..."
<0076>
// It's been a long time since I've seen Ryou flustered like this.
<0077>
// \{Ryou} "Uh... um... I-I... u-umm... uu... I'm not ready yet... uu, uu~..."
<0078>
// She stares at me somehow.
<0079>
// \{\m{B}} "As if."
<0080>
// \{Ryou} "Eh?"
<0081>
// \{\m{B}} "I was joking."
<0082>
// \{Ryou} "I... it was... a joke?"
<0083>
// \{\m{B}} "Yeah."
<0084>
// \{\m{B}} "My stomach's full, so let's take a walk."
<0085>
// \{\m{B}} "Oh, that's right, how about the fortune telling at the game center again?"
<0086>
// I take Ryou's hand, and walk for a bit.
<0087>
// Stretch... my arm gets pulled.
<0088>
// \{Ryou} "........."
<0089>
// \{\m{B}} "Ryou...?"
<0090>
// I say that, standing there.
<0091>
// \{Ryou} "Uh... um... \m{B}-kun..."
<0092>
// \{\m{B}} "Yeah?"
<0093>
// \{Ryou} "I... I'm... fine with... it."
<0094>
// \{\m{B}} "... Eh...?"
<0095>
// \{Ryou} "U-umm... if there's a place you want to go to, \m{B}-kun... then, I'll come with you."
<0096>
// \{\m{B}} "........."
<0097>
// Her hand shakes a little bit, indicating her courage.
<0098>
// \{Ryou} "If... if we're going out..."
<0099>
// \{Ryou} "We're lovers so... s-something like that... should be normal, I think."
<0100>
// She says that with a blushing, tense face...
<0101>
// And then I finally realize it.
<0102>
// About the words she just said back to me.
<0103>
// Ryou will... do anything I want her to do.
<0104>
// That's how much she likes me.
<0105>
// That's what I figured out.
<0106>
// Because of that, I shouldn't say anything that I don't want her to do.
<0107>
// And...
<0108>
// I'm not ready to go that far with her so...
<0109>
// \{Ryou} "\m{B}-kun..."
<0110>
// Her hand tightens on mine.
<0111>
// That "form" shows how prepared she is.
<0112>
// \{\m{B}} "... Sorry, Ryou, maybe another time."
<0113>
// \{Ryou} "... Eh?"
<0114>
// \{\m{B}} "How should I say this... I think doing that is a bit too early... you know."
<0115>
// \{Ryou} "Ah... hmm... but, if we're lovers, then I don't think it's... strange at all..."
<0116>
// \{\m{B}} "--Well..."
<0117>
// I'm... the worst...
<0118>
// Saying something like that to a girl...
<0119>
// \{\m{B}} "I consider you important, so..."
<0120>
// And I try to hide those "lies" by "playing on them"...
<0121>
// \{Ryou} "\m{B}-kun..."
<0122>
// But... Ryou's face comes apart at those "words".
<0123>
// I feel like I'm a hypocrite or something.
<0124>
// \{Ryou} "I'm happy... that you think so seriously about something like that."
<0125>
// Swish... something piles up inside me.
<0126>
// Is it feelings of guilt... or is it actually guilt...
<0127>
// Grasping the warmth of her hand was painful...
<0128>
// \{Ryou} "I was a bit scared since you brought that up, and I wasn't prepared or anything."
<0129>
// \{\m{B}} "I see, sorry about that."
<0130>
// \{Ryou} "Not at all... half of me was surprised, and the other half was happy..."
<0131>
// Ryou returns to her usual smile, leaving me breathing a sigh of relief.
<0132>
// I notice that she's been staring out, looking at herself.
<0133>
// And, I suddenly stare at her serious face.
<0134>
// \{\m{B}} "What's wrong?"
<0135>
// \{Ryou} "Uh... um... there's one thing I'd like to ask."
<0136>
// \{\m{B}} "Something you'd like to ask?"
<0137>
// \{Ryou} "Yes."
<0138>
// She pulls back her chin, nodding slightly.
<0139>
// \{Ryou} "Uh... um..."
<0140>
// \{Ryou} "Well... asking you something like this... feels a bit strange..."
<0141>
// \{Ryou} "........."
<0142>
// And in that one hesitating moment...
<0143>
// \{Ryou} "... Um... \m{B}... kun... do you, like me...?"
<0144>
// \{\m{B}} "Eh..."
<0145>
// I feel like time has stopped.
<0146>
// "Do you, like me...?"
<0147>
// A simple question...
<0148>
// Rather... we've asked each other a lot of amusing questions while we were going out...
<0149>
// If we're lovers... there's no need to answer this question.
<0150>
// But...
<0151>
// \{\m{B}} "........."
<0152>
// I couldn't answer...
<0153>
// I couldn't say those three words, the "I like you".喉を通らない。
<0154>
// I realize my own feelings.
<0155>
// Yesterday... when I kissed Ryou and saw Kyou and felt that shock...
<0156>
// My chest had been struck with pain...
<0157>
// And Ryou stared at me...
<0158>
// I only made one kind of face...
<0159>
// One that gave off that uncertainty that was building inside me...
<0160>
// My heart swayed, holding back those words.
<0161>
// \{Ryou} "\m{B}-kun..."
<0162>
// Speaking of which...
<0163>
// I haven't told Ryou that I liked her yet...
<0164>
// Even though we're going out...
<0165>
// I hadn't said my feelings...
<0166>
// But...
<0167>
// My feelings...
<0168>
// My mouth was dry.
<0169>
// My jaw remained closed, as did my lips, and no words came out.
<0170>
// This terrible silence continued.
<0171>
// My throat remained dry, refusing to say those words.
<0172>
// I sigh with this hesitant atmosphere floating about.
<0173>
// Frankly, I couldn't bear to watch her face.
<0174>
// \{Ryou} "Ah... s-sorry, that was rude of me."
<0175>
// Suddenly, she drops her face.
<0176>
// \{\m{B}} "...?"
<0177>
// \{Ryou} "W-well... saying something like that, is a bit embarrassing."
<0178>
// \{Ryou} "To make you say something that you'd find embarrassing to yourself..."
<0179>
// \{Ryou} "I'm sorry."
<0180>
// Ryou's smile... somehow seems like a forced, apologetic smile.
<0181>
// I wonder if I blushed, when she turned her eyes away like that?
<0182>
// Though the circumstances are quite convenient for me.
<0183>
// I felt like... my existence is gradually falling, becoming vile...
<0184>
// Indeed, I had taken in a pitiable... disgusting feeling.
<0185>
// Even then...
<0186>
// Inside my mind was the face of someone who was the same as Ryou's...
<0187>
// Kyou's... her tearful look from yesterday--...
<0188>
// ... I couldn't wipe that away from my eyes...
<0189>
// \{Ryou} "Shouldn't we get going soon?"
<0190>
// \{Ryou} "Umm... I, still want to try out the horoscope from the game center."
<0191>
// \{\m{B}} "Yeah, you're right."
<0192>
// I nod, smiling.
<0193>
// Rather, I nodded because I had a responsibility to...
<0194>
// That I forced myself to nod...
<0195>
// Making sure our hands were tied together, they slightly swung around as we walked.
<0196>
// Kerplunk!
<0197>
// "This time, you will probably get into an argument because of a trivial thing."
<0198>
// "Hesitation brings anxiety, and anxiety brings hesitation."
<0199>
// "If you don't wish to lose your thoughts, the one thing you can do is put an effort towards your companion."
<0200>
// "If you understand each other well, your relationship will strengthen."
<0201>
// "Do not be impatient."
<0202>
// "Your lucky item is: silverwork, jewel."
<0203>
// "Your lucky color is: red."
<0204>
// ... Is this a coincidence...?
<0205>
// The fortune telling from this machine seems to be leaning towards a bad result...
<0206>
// Ryou's fleeting glance at the cabinet.
<0207>
// \{Ryou} "Not a result you can really talk much about."
<0208>
// \{\m{B}} "I guess. Well, it's a fortune telling game, so I kind of find it hard to feel it being authentic at all."
<0209>
// \{Ryou} "A fortune telling is still fortune telling, even in a game."
<0210>
// \{\m{B}} "But, unless it's someone who's talking to us directly, no matter what, it'll be lacking in terms of interest..."*
<0211>
// \{\m{B}} "That's what you said before, wasn't it?"
<0212>
// \{Ryou} "Umm... that's true but..."
<0213>
// \{Ryou} "Even then, it's still fortune telling."
<0214>
// She smiles, saying that.
<0215>
// \{Ryou} "The purpose of fortune telling is to confront the future."
<0216>
// \{Ryou} "We are the ones who choose how to react to that information."
<0217>
// \{\m{B}} "Well, I guess."
<0218>
// Confronting the future... huh.
<0219>
// If that's the case... then how should I take this fortune telling...?
<0220>
// Hesitation brings anxiety, anxiety brings hesitation--...
<0221>
// What makes me hesitated...
<0222>
// And uneasy...
<0223>
// .........
<0224>
// ... Kyou...
<0225>
// In the end... even though I spent the entire day with Ryou, I couldn't get her out of my mind.
<0226>
// And it's not even her smiling, beaming face, it's her teary face.
<0227>
// Even then, I smiled in front of Ryou.
<0228>
// Falling into this self-hatred... I wonder how I'm acting so much like a hypocrite...
<0229>
// And then, Ryou and I part ways.
<0230>
// We kiss on a corner of the street where no one was around.
<0231>
// Something like that is quite obvious to do anyway...
<0232>
// Closing my eyes and seeing Ryou in my mind, I stop myself.
<0233>
// I thought to myself... what kind of cruelty was this?
<0234>
// That face is just the same as Kyou's...
<0235>
// Bringing their faces close together, ignoring the long and short hair lengths...
<0236>
// When the lips piled up together, I couldn't tell whether it was Ryou or Kyou...
<0237>
// In that...
<0238>
// In my mind was Kyou...
<0239>
// Thinking that, the warmth I felt there was not Ryou's, but Kyou's...
<0240>
// Her lips faintly trembled.
<0241>
// I slightly stick out my tongue, reaching out for her teeth.
<0242>
// Her shoulders tremble, as if surprised.
<0243>
// But she wasn't resisting.
<0244>
// My tongue moves forward.
<0245>
// ... Ryou also responds in the same manner.
<0246>
// --Kyou...
<0247>
// That name echoes in my mind.
<0248>
// Slowly, the warmth goes away.
<0249>
// When I open my eyes, in front of me is the embarrassed... but happy and blushing face of Ryou...
<0250>
// Looking at her face, it somehow seemed out of place.
<0251>
// Even then, surely, the way I am now still smiles.
<0252>
// It's just, to keep Ryou from feeling uneasy, I force my smile...
<0253>
// Ryou lowers her head, and continues off on the road to her house.
<0254>
// She looked back many times as she went far away.
<0255>
// I wave my hand until I can't see her anymore.
<0256>
// And then I become alone...
<0257>
// Punch... I hit a nearby wall with my fist.
<0258>
// \{\m{B}} "... I'm the worst... aren't I..."
<0259>
// The pain echoes, not just in my fist, but forever in my mind...
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